Muhammad West – Parenting #04 – Early Childhood Development

			We live in Michigan or James Miller Amanda Rahim al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Salatu was Salam
ala shiraki more serene. So in the Mohammed Ali he also he married my beloved brothers and sisters
of Saira Malik Mohammed Omar when it comes to having the lower blood amin always and forever will be
in the praise of Allah and I should alert you know, Allah will be a witness that man has the right
of worship besides Allah subhanaw taala and we send our love and greetings salutations so beloved
Nabi Muhammad Sallallahu sallam, this pious and pure family to his companions and all those who
follow his soon until the end of time, Allah blesses to be amongst them. I mean, what from the river
		

			hamdulillah we continue our series on parenting. Last week we spoke about the pregnancy and at birth
and the name giving and all the rules attached to naming a child. And then a hamdulillah mela bless
us and bless us in our offspring mothers panatela protect our children, my children and your
children. Moloch allowed him to be born and raised and live and die on demand and taqwa and may we
die as a man and taqwa as well. I mean, and from the law once a child comes into this world, and
even before that, the struggles and the stress of parenthood begins, and really is only through
being a parent, there's one appreciate one's own parents that's panela. So much effort and so much
		

			work and concern goes into raising a child and and I guess as a parent, you're never in, you never
stop whining, even, you know, you're worried about them before they're born. While they are, they
are being carried as children, you're worried about dementia panela, I'm sure that even when they
grow up, and in the old age, if you're still alive, you'll still worry about your work the well
being of your children, and you'll perhaps only only stop when they join us. We join our parents and
children during one another in general for those I mean, that is the only time the worries of
appearance will really end. And so inshallah talking about the different stages in a child's
		

			development, different bodies and different ways of raising a child, it's panela, both the
psychologists of today, they have split the different stages of development of a child. And we find
this even indeed, even within our our Sharia, even within Islam, that different levels of a child's
development has different rules attached to it. And there are different ways in which we interact
with the child. And so today inshallah we'll talk about the early childhood development, basically,
from birth until about seven years old from birth, until they are ready to go to school, this early
stage in a child's development is perhaps the most important part of, of a child's young life. And
		

			so much of the body is developing so much of the brain and the the functions are developing in these
years. And finally, it is a tsunami of a law that every single child is born with zero every child
is born with a, you know, a completely blank slate, an empty canvas, and it is for us as parents to
nurture that child to develop to their full potential and release panela if you are listening to
this lecture, you're healthy, you're able to walk and talk, you're able to have a job, then it is so
much of a blessing that we and the things that we need to give to Allah and our parents. That
process here that you know, if they neglected us for one day, or even a part of a day, you know, in
		

			this early stage, if we will lift not to not to eat will lift in the cold or in the heat or
whatever, just for a few hours, it could have completely ruined our development. And so if anyone
has developed your maturity, then it means that we had parents that watched over us every single day
and never left us to harmonium, Allah bless our parents. And if they passed away my look around him,
I place in Jannah. And so in these stages of developments, you find the psychologist they mentioned
that from birth until about two years, that's a special stage when the child has an infant or a
toddler. And then from two to about seven, the child is a preschooler and the special things that
		

			needs to happen and milestones that need to happen during that age. And then from when the child
goes to school. So from primary school, up until they reach adolescence, the primary school years
and even Islam at the age of seven is a specific age and a child is said to be mommies, meaning
they're not yet McAuliffe, but they're the age of discernment. They know what is right from wrong,
they are aware of certain things they are intellectually mature enough to choose make choices. And
then of course, once they reach the age of adolescence, they each puberty they mature to that level
where they're actually accountable. And we know the very important thing that when someone becomes
		

			mukalla now they are accountable with Allah to the deeds they actually get a reward or punishment
for the the mistakes. And of course everyone before the age of being Caliph, every child that is
polemical, if they are on the fifth drop it no matter what they do, or las panatela does not hold
them accountable for the reasons and we know from Islam, that if a child even though he never
worship Allah, he was you know, whatever religion you practice if he died before he was buckled up
when he's a Muslim, and he enters Jenna, what from Lila and so it is only at the age of becoming
Caliph does the pin start to start to write, and these are narration and a lot of this is attributed
		

			to the set to be attributed to scenario the Alon, although I have not found a inauthentic innovation
for this, but the meaning is correct. If you said that on the side of play with your children for
the first seven years, so up until the age of seven, spend your time with him in play. And then once
the after the age of seven, then focus on teaching them teach them teach them manners and teach them
spend a lot of time in teaching them skills and and the education and then the next seven years now
by
		

			Sep from 14 during the teenage years, advise them you constantly control them so much all you can do
is to give them counsel advice, but they will make their own decisions and SubhanAllah. From an
Islamic perspective, there is truth to this. And of course of psychologically we know that these
different stages As parents, we can only impact and influence our children in in different ways. And
so in the early for the first seven years, what we find from the Hadith all the ways in Ibiza Salaam
interacted with children, what Allah describes the few is about children at this age in the Quran,
we know that the priority for us as parents, is to give our kids the best possible environment to
		

			flourish. And we do so by giving an environment that is safe and loving, and we are affectionate and
we spend a lot of time playing with him, enjoying them. And if we were to teach them we teach him
through examples, you know, so as between zero and seven you can put them really in a class and you
you have to you they learn through play, and they learn through seeing us and seeing what the
parents do. So you can't give them advice on sada how to Posada, these are the pillars of Salah they
never gonna learn like that. Instead, or most children some children learn differently. But for most
children, they will learn by seeing mommy and daddy making Sala and then they will start playing and
		

			then eventually they will start mimicking and interacting and it will become a habit of for a while.
And so Subhanallah Our job was if you have children between the age Your job is to really to shower
them with love and affection and make them happy and comfortable and then teach them through play
and through your good example we see this from an obese also nominees a number of Heidi's that we
take from the Navajo salom unnecessarily olana unece interestingly, very abusively, this is coming
from Anissa with us and as we said he was six years old when he made the Nabi so solemn and this was
then a visa Salaam asst we could say was Squier, you would go and he would bring things and fix
		

			things and you'll be sent home with give him little errands, the boy You know, he was just there to
help them be so solemn. And so from a young he knew that I'd be so sad I'm only as a child, because
the porcelain passed away when he was 16. And so unless really has a child's perspective of the
nervous system, and he says anuses that I never saw anyone who was more kind of affectionate towards
children then the Prophet sallallahu Sallam and in Ennis continues. Then abyssal Salaam, son then we
had a son Ibrahim, who is Lawson was being cared for by a witness. Another lady was breastfeeding
Ibrahim, and she lived for outside of Medina. And so the navitas alum would make an extra effort in
		

			his busy schedule to visit this Ibrahim every single day. And when he saw him in the NSA saying that
I've used a lump sort of couldn't resist picking up this young boy this was two years old when he
passed away and kissing him and hugging him and he would come back and he really and so as the
saying was gonna be so solemn love to shower children with love and and affection, Osama or the Alon
Osama also have as we know, he is the son of his age, the adopted son of Mr. Lim sort of sounds like
a grandson. And so Osama says that you know, we were I was a young boy. And I remember when the navy
seal and put me on on his lap on one leg and he put her son You know, Hassan and Hussein Hassan on
		

			the other lap. So yes, these two little boys, maybe they are four, five years old, the two of them
and he says we're both on the Nationals lap and he hugs the two of us now this was hugging these two
boys and he says let me make the dog he says Oh Allah please be merciful on the two of them as I am
merciful on them meaning Allah loves them like I like I love them. And then another Heidi's who know
of a man he sees an abuse also in the merchants resources in the masjid. And he's got his
grandchildren will see Miss Hassan and Hussein with him. And that avviso salaam you know this in
public, he can't resist but to hug and kisses me son was really you know, he couldn't control
		

			himself basically around his grandchildren, and you teach them and this man, you know, looked at the
abuser. And he said, You know, I have 10 children and Never in my life have I kissed any of them.
I've never kissed him like you know, like you're kissing them. And there'll be the Salaam looks at
this man and he says whomever is not merciful to others will not be treated mercifully in other
hardyston abuses. What can I do about someone who has never mind is that if you are looking at me as
if there is something strange that you don't kiss your children, rather, it is strange, that I kiss
my children are all the strange that you have never kissed your own children. There's something
		

			wrong in you. And so again, I be so solemn, very affectionate, very open in his in his affection.
And it's not just, you know, hugging and kissing and playing with it with these children. But then
every so Salaam would talk to not just his own children, but the Sahaba and the young children of
the community. You would give them special time you will take them on the rides on his camel, he
when he would see them he would have conversations with him on the level. One of the beautiful
examples was this Sahabi young young girl named pilot before she became the mother of Khalid she was
a young girl, she was all the Sahaba who were born as a senior. The side note, we know that a group
		

			of the Muslims when the persecution in Makkah was too much. they immigrated to Abyssinia to
Ethiopia. And so she was born in Ethiopia. She was born like a refugee. And she grew up the first
few years of her life in Ethiopia, and she learned the language of the abyssinians
		

			Arabic. And so when she comes to Medina, she's learning Arabic And it's sort of a new experience for
her. And she was wearing a V, bright colored, yellow kind of clothes, which was not the style of
Medina. So she was wearing ncop and kind of outfit, and then a recent Caesar and he goes to her and
he says Center, a center center is a word in the Ethiopian language to me, it's pretty so he's
saying to her, she's a young girl for five years old. And she remembers, she says, there's gonna be
who came to me and said how pretty this dress is, but he uses not Arabic, he uses the Ethiopian
language. And then you know, she starts to interact with an abyssal Salaam and her father like
		

			pulsar went live in a B, don't you know, don't disturb him. He's, you know, he's busy, you will see
time. And then I've used this lever don't pull away like this. And then I basically made it to our
we have a long life. And this goes panel activities of the last Sahaba was 100 years old that she
passed away. point isn't it so solemn, took the special note and spoke to the the kids on on the on
the level. Another example, we just spoke about unece. Now, as we say, he knew the novices or
non-winning from six to 16. So he was always a young boy around and abuse of Salaam. Now unece had a
younger brother, you know, he had an a younger brother, who they used to call a boomers, right? So
		

			that's all these names, but they used to call him I think his name was nice, but they used to call
him a boomer era nickname. So he's younger than and so maybe he's about four or five years old. And
this boy here, the pit Sparrow, a new leaf, alright, so he had a spit Sparrow, a sparrow in Arabic
is a new place. So he had this little spider, which used to play with you to bring around. And so
then all of a sudden, the sparrow died, the pit died. And this little boy was really, really sad.
And so then abyssal Salem saw this boy that he said, and he goes to him, and he says, Yeah, about a
mile away, this is Oh my god, what happened to know what happened to your Sparrow, like the same
		

			thing, we just fell, though. And he's like, you know, consoling this little boy, because his birth
had died, and so span a lot meaning that a visa Salaam took notice of the pics of the little
children in his in his communities, panela and you will make it a special time to give them his his
attention. Of course, it's not only about showering our kids, our young children with love, and you
know, allowing them to get away with everything. And we have to obviously discipline them and teach
them and Allah Subhana Allah mentions this in the Quran in Surah Surah Lu is all about our and you
know, ethics between gender and those kinds of things, and hijab. And so Allah says, already from a
		

			young age, Allah says, Oh, you will believe, let your servants those who work in your house. And
those of you who are still under age and the children that are still young, when they ask for your
permission, let them knock on the door, or let them ask for permission before they come into your
private rooms, especially at three times before fudger. And when you take off your clothes in the
afternoon, meaning in any community that lives in a very hot climate, they tend to sleep in the
afternoon. So they will play Lula or siesta they go to sleep when it's very hot. And so you take
your clothes off to go sleep. And so the Allah saying that before budget when you're not dressed
		

			appropriately, because you in your bedroom, or in the afternoon when you're sleeping, or off the
shy, then they should take permission. Because these are three times of privacy for you. It's also
really, it's instructing us that even though there are children, and they might not be aware of what
is our not our what we should begin to teach them the manners and we should teach them about what is
appropriate and inappropriate contact and even on their own body. So much can be said about this. If
So Allah is already instructing us to make children aware of these things, and to teach them good
habits at a young at a young age. And then of course, on them also says, The Teacher children to
		

			make Salah from the age of seven. So from the age of seven, we should be actively encouraging our
children to make solar and teaching them to make solar. And then he says that give them a light
spanking, if by the age of 10, they're not making solar. And we'll talk more about this insha Allah
in the next section, and they should be sleeping in separate beds, meaning boys and girls should not
be sleeping together at that kind of age. And they should be the segregation or learning from that
from that age. So we thought we should teach our children these kind of etiquettes. And of course,
the best way in which to teach at this young age is through is through play and through imitation,
		

			they will learn from the example of the parents 10 times better than learning by you telling them to
do something children that he if you tell him to do something that I'm going to do it, but they will
imitate those behind Allah, when we look at our children at that age really is reflection of us as
parents, and so we find them to be so solemn. He would make an effort that when he performed certain
virtuous deeds, his grandchildren were with him. And so we find Obama or mama will easily
granddaughter going to be so sad. Um, sometimes we only think the only grandchildren he had was
husband at the same. That'd be so mad at multiple grandchildren. One of his granddaughters was Mama,
		

			and she was the daughter of Xena. And so there's a hadith where the Prophet Salam is carrying his
granddaughter, you know, like on his shoulders, her legs are sort of, you know, around the
shoulders, and he's carrying her to the masjid and he gets to the masjid and he's gonna leave the
Salah, and he's still keeping her and he makes her with her
		

			You know, in his arms, and when he goes down into suit, he puts it down on the ground. And then when
he gets up, he picks it up again and he keeps away why he's leaving with the last panel. I don't
think any mom today would possibly leave the Salah, and he still keeps his child who his
grandchildren in his arms. Gemma would allow him to do that. But upon a lot the enemy's son did
this. And he brought us I mean, and that's a lot can be said as well he brought it to the masjid as
a child. We also know the very famous Hadith which then abyssal Salaam was leading the Salah, and he
you know he was very long interviewed so long that one of the youngest Sahaba lifted up his head
		

			from sudo to see what's going on. Why does an abuser Salam take so long Institute and he found that
Hassan or the alarm was a young boy was on the webisodes back playing husi oc on his grandfather,
and so then abyssal Salaam, when he finished Sala, he explained to the Sahaba I did not prolong the
sujood except that my grandson and he will always say my son didn't say my grandson, my boy was on
my back playing and I didn't want to disturb him. I was gonna leave him to play until he was
finished played. And then I then when he was unclean, we'll see we'll see. Then I got a phone shoot.
We also know that analog times and maybe some would give up and he's on the pulpit and he would see
		

			his grandsons in the masjid and he would basically fetch them and he would put them Hassan and
Hussein was him on the member while you while he would give while he would give a hoot back and so
then every so solemn would teach them by just being in his company when he was doing something good.
And you know, you'll find some you were bidding to bring the kids to the masjid. You want to recite
Quran with him said they even if they're playing, just the fact that they see you reciting Quran in
itself is a learning, for example, you find in the masjid very beautifully. When a father wants to
maybe put some money in the towel, you would give it to the boy and so you put it in the towel. And
		

			so he's teaching the children that you know, we give charity we give to the masjid regularly and
beautiful ways when we see them making mistakes. Of course we need to reprimand in a very nice way
and look at another Hadith Omar even Abu Salah. So the prophets of Allah married him Salama, one of
the wives of an abyssal Salaam, her name was on Salah. She was previously married and she had other
children. So these children are the stepchildren step sons and daughters of the processes alum and
he raised him as well. So he raised these children of his other wives. And so Omar, who is a step
son to the Nabi sallam, he basically says a hadith which he tells you as a young boy, he remembers,
		

			then I be so sad. I'm teaching him. He says I was a young boy, under the key of the messenger, it's
also in them so there'll be so much my stepdad. And he looked after me when I was from as a young
boy. And when we used to eat, my hands used to go everywhere, you know, like a small child, he grabs
with both hands, everything in every way and he eats like that. You know how children eat other than
obeso salaam says to him, yo, hula, my boy, you know, my dear boy, before you eat, mentioned Allah's
Name, say Bismillah and eat with your right hand and eat that which is only close to you don't reach
over the plate, eat with the close to you. And so, and then he says, since then, I've always been
		

			eating this way. So that little advice he saved in such a nice way. And he, you made me feel so good
that I always offer that I didn't need another listens panel off of the reasons teaching was
amazing. And we also look at this one customer saying that the alarm they were passing by the zakka,
you know, goods, and there was dates in the carpet. And so they took the two of them took some data
out of the bottom, they put it in the mouth, and then resold and pulled it out of the mouth and
said, this is not we are not allowed to have charity, meaning you know, the family are going to be
solid, we're not allowed to take any charity. And so he said this is haram for us. And he told them
		

			that you are underweight, you should not you're not allowed to take anything of charity and
obviously by extension does not belong to you. And maybe we can think of our times the kids go to
the shop and they maybe take something off the shelf and they open a pack of new easy to teach them
that this you haven't paid for it doesn't belong to you. And so they understand right from wrong
without punishing them because of course it's not meant in a in a in a in a bad way. But to teach
them of course right from wrong is very important at this age because they can really understand
right from wrong. People ask you know, especially those who have the first child and Masha Allah
		

			when our first child comes we automatically you know bold this picture that by the age of five, six
there will be hospital for an amine, and there'll be school you know in the when they 15 and they'll
get the first degrees before they're 20 and inshallah write books and they're going to be win Nobel
prizes that handler and by the time you know the last one comes Alhamdulillah whatever happens we
happy no problem. You know if so long as they are passing, when they get a BOC, it's fine. We almost
lower another lower expectations, but we become more realistic. So maybe that's the correct word.
And so people ask what are the important things that we need to teach children, primary children and
		

			what are the lessons we need to teach? islamically? What should we teach them because there's a lot
of material out there, what to teach those kids academically, but or secular who would also say,
what about islamically the perhaps the most important thing to teach children is that Allah loves
them and to teach them
		

			concept of Allah's mercy and kindness. Panama it is a horrible it is, you know totally haram almost
for you to only expose your children to if you don't do this, Allah is going to punish you. And if
you do, if you don't use Panama Allah is always the nasty one, that if you if you don't go to bed,
they're always going to burn you're always going to put in January, this should not even you know
cross your mind. In fact, Allah subhanaw taala will only hold them accountable many, many years
later when they are more or less, what you're saying even is, is a lie. They whatever they do, Allah
subhanaw taala is forgiving of them. And they will they are they are generalities at this point in
		

			their life. They are in Ghana, you know you should be worried the selfless punishments punish you.
So the best we can do is to teach about love kindness and is Rama that whatever good in the world is
from Allah, they do something bad Allah is going to protect the image should feel safe, they should
always find that Allah's love is more important than our love as parents then of course, also that
to teach them to love the parents and to love the siblings, the families to be loving children and
to not to be violent and to be respectful. Perhaps this is the most important lesson after they love
Allah subhanaw taala. And then, you know, very good thing to start off with is to teach in the
		

			stories of the unborn children love stories. And so Allah has put so many stories in the Quran. For
us as adults, of course, for children, they should also be aware of the stories and they will
remember so we should known abuse with a man, you know, you could talk to the animals now be in a
bow with him, you know, he defeated Goliath, we know him animals. So all these stories, we should,
all kids should learn those stories. Another thing that's very important is about the bodies and
personal hygiene. So the Sharia wants you to teach them, you know, toilet manners, and how to use
the toilet how to wash themselves and clean themselves, this is very, very important at that age.
		

			And then of course, good habits. So along with good habits like eating and sleeping on time, good
islamic habits, like eating with your right hand, entering the toilet with your left foot coming off
of your right foot, these basic habits, we should sort of try to inculcate in them as a routine and
make it a ritual, you know, make it fun as well. So they learn these things. And when we do good
deeds, so if we are reciting Quran, if we are listening to a lecture, whatever it might be, include
them in it, even if they are playful, and they and they get distracted, no problem. And you know,
for example, we do this for a mobile be very good at the moment, we say, Look, guys, it's going to
		

			be fast tomorrow. So we all need to fast, you can fast half a day. So even though it's not a real
fast thing, because you can't force off a day. But it is to encourage them that you participate in
the in the action. You know, also, as we said communication skills to speak to them about sometimes
at a very young age, someone really close my pass away. And so to communicate and to listen to them,
to talk to them about things about gender and the RTR and all those things in a very, in a soft way
in a way that makes them to understand. And yes, we have to teach them about dangers and harmful
things, there are things about the dunya that is harmful and dangerous. And so they should be aware
		

			of things like shape on and on without scaring them. But to make them away, you know, that, you
know, Allah is good, and she fine is bad, and telling lies are bad and those kinds of things. We
teach them the harmful stuff so that they can avoid it. And we explain why. So don't only tell your
children and don't do this, you're not You mustn't do that. explain to them why, you know you eat
with your right hand. And why do you seem to with your left hand and why, you know, we make Salah
explained to them the reason why it is so sad that people in the teenage years or in the 20s, they
tell me I've left Islam, because all I was told my whole life is you must do this. And there was no
		

			reason why and if you don't do it, you'll be punished. That's all they knew about Islam. It was a
whole list of do's and don'ts, and there was no reason behind it. And so it's important to explain
physical stimulation. The professor Salam encourages us like we said, you know, the Hadith about
swimming and all those kinds of things that he physically It is part of the development. And of
course, it find the young and the Sahaba of old. This is a very important time for memorizing so if
you can, and if not, don't pressurize them. But the minds are very open to memorizing and they saw
if the child is able to because they can't understand complex things and the reasoning gives the
		

			ability to reason muscle develop. And so memorizing is a very strong tool and that's why many
children they learn a lot of the back to us and you know, is of the Quran, the short Sutras, this is
the time to try and teach them those things. But again, it is not about pressurizing them into doing
it. It is not important that they memorize books and books of things are many Hadees of being
hospitable Quran if Allah blesses them with Mashallah is good. It is much more important for them to
have a relationship with Islam. And this is the most important thing, let them have a good
relationship with Islam. And as for learning details and information that will come with time, if
		

			the relationship is they, they that will come and if they've memorized many things, and they don't
have a relationship with Islam. And really it will not serve much purpose in the future. Just we
divert a moment to talk about an inch foreign law. I must mention of course I'm not a expert at all
in the field of childhood.
		

			Psychology, I'm not the field in any kind of psychology. In fact, the only thing I can say is that
I'm a father of three children, one hamdulillah. And it is a very difficult thing for us learning
how to be a parent, many of us, you know, will go into it clueless. And there's so much books, and
it almost becomes overwhelming when you go online. And check is my child on track in terms of
development. And, you know, it can sometimes depress you, when you compare what the psychologists
say, your child should be doing XYZ. At a certain age, they call it milestones, and you'd feel
you're alone, my child is already one year in me still not doing this. And they're not doing that
		

			they five, and they can't talk, those kinds of things. And of course, as a parent, it's very, very
demoralizing. But it's important also, to take note of these milestones. So as they say, skills such
as talking, taking the first step, smiling, even waving bye, bye, Blow a kiss, all these are called
developmental milestones. And children need to reach these milestones at different levels in the in
the development. And so the question that we're always asking, Is my child on track? How are they
doing? Are they falling behind, you know, we are they, on top of the milestones is a very big thing
to ask. And these are checklists, which there are many checklists, but most of them, they divided
		

			into four different categories. They are physical development. So the body, you need to move in a
certain way, at two years old, five years old, the body needs to do certain things, then these
cognitive, you know, thinking, the ability to reason and think that needs to develop at a certain
age, language development, the ability to speak, listen and speak. And, of course, the social and
emotional development, how they interact with other children and other people around them. And each
one of these areas, the child needs to meet these, these milestones. And you know, very
interestingly, there was a study done by a research institute where they took the base lists. So
		

			there are many lists of milestones that are two months, these are the physical milestones, or two
months, these are the emotional milestones. So many researchers have put down lists, and they took
the best list in the world of Boston child's hospital, took these lists of the best of them in the
world. And they looked at these lists, and they said that the appears to be 14 milestones that
appear common across all business. So different lists will have different things as milestones. But
they found that there are 40 commonalities across all these lists. And we've added some of them
here, and I won't go through all of them. But it's something for you to read if you have a child
		

			between the age of zero, and five, basically, to look at these lists. And I must give a disclaimer
here, that even though it's important to measure your child against these benchmarks, to look at
your child and compare, how does your child compete on these milestones, remember that each child
develops differently, each subject, sometimes your child will skip milestones, which is not very
initially good, you might think it's good. But for example, if a child walks before they can throw,
it's not a good thing your child should crawl, sometimes your child struggles to reach a milestone
and inshallah, once they reach that milestone, they excel. And really, maybe I can just mention my,
		

			my experience as a parent, you know, it's not a gradual thing. So most things in life, you'll find
these gradual progression, children's panela, one day they are unable to walk, and all of a sudden
they walking one day, it's like a switch that is turned on, they completely not talking. And then
immediately the next day, they start dabbling and the words come like all of a sudden, and so it
sort of once you reach that point, you know, the switch goes on, and then the development comes and
so each child is going to be different. Get there is not a single child that is a textbook child in
terms of development. And so the best you can do is to look at those milestones and look at your
		

			child's development and to regularly consult you medical experts on educational experts, that they
will properly assess how your child is developing. And if there are any delays in your child's
development, do the necessary interventions that is needed and Subhanallah if there is genuine
concern, say something physically is not on par with should be all cognitively all the languages are
on par, then you owe it to your child's development to take the intervention that is necessary.
Sometimes it's very difficult as a parent is you know, we almost tell ourselves, it will be okay
there will just come right? In insha Allah sometimes that happens, but it's better for us to give
		

			that intervention. Because the way we teach every single moment for a child of this age, every meal,
every conversation is a is a learning experience. We are learning how to how to be a human being.
And so sometimes they need a different environment and they need different tools and skills that
will help them to learn and so early intervention can be life changing. And also remember sometimes
I know there are many parents, that when the children are not developing, then they blame
themselves. For us as parents we did not decide what kind of childhood was going to give us. There
are some parents as we sit in as Allah mentioned the Quran for some Allah gives voice others he
		

			gives goals others he gives both boys and girls and others he gives no children. Sometimes he gives
you a child that will excel at everything. Another child will struggle another child will be sickly
		

			another child would live long another child will die. This is Allah's decree. And we can decide what
Allah gives us. Rather, Allah has given those children to us as an Amana, they don't belong to us,
they belong to Him. And so we need to do our best to provide them with the best environment for them
to flourish, the best environment for them to develop. And the risk, the result lies with Allah, we
tie the camel, we give what we can. And the result is with Allah. And so I've given a list of
milestones. And I said, as I mentioned, I say, this is taken from, you know, different websites and
things like that. And I appreciate that if there are any psychologists, you read this and you agree
		

			or disagree, please take me now. But this is for, you know, if I say, if I was a new parent, these
things are very important to look at and to assist your child. But of course, don't go overboard,
every child is different. And so look at these milestones and go through them. And in sha Allah,
there is some benefit. Now, there are certain warning signs, of course, sometimes, and as I said,
the best thing for your child in the development is to constantly take him to the pediatrician, the
doctor to do a proper analysis. And so things that you need to be wary about, especially young
children, if they don't respond to stimulus, you know, if they don't, loud noises, bangs and stuff
		

			like that they don't turn the head, it's there could be a hearing problem. Or if, you know, you move
your hand, the eyes don't follow, they don't make contact with your eyes, they're not able to reach
to the mouth, especially as young children or sit up there, they're clumsy, or they draw a lot,
these are things that you need to need to look at. You also will notice if a child is struggling
with the speech, or there's a major delay in the speech, they need something to to check, check up,
you know, extreme behavioral issues of having very angry or very sad, very scared, those things may
be out of the normal range, they have this difference between tantrums and meltdowns, you know,
		

			those kind of things, you have to assist those things. And it's best for you to consult a doctor so
that their child again, like any, any if a child, so for example, if the child had a physical sick,
a bit of cough, or they had a fever, we take the child to the doctor, and so they could be a
developmental problem. And so we also take the child to the doctor. Lastly, and I mentioned this for
any one of us, any parents, that is maybe struggling with a child that is sick or a child that is
not meeting with developmental goals, they have some kind of disability. And I was presented with
you and bless you in that last part that is your taste. And I was pinata Allah has given that child
		

			to you as an Amana and it is a means for you to intergender and it means for you to give extra
effort. And so this is part of that love that Allah subhanaw taala has basically provided you with
and Allah will not put a burden upon anyone, one that they cannot meet. Also, it doesn't mean that
you should sort of give up hope and become fearful or despondent is no just one person and there's
so many that we can take one person that really stands out to show you the amazing the nature of
loss panthella perhaps the greatest scholar in Islam is Imam Bihari. We know that Soham Hari, his
book is the most authentic book and the most important book in the world. After the Quran of the
		

			Quran, Imam Khalid, his book is the most important and most authentic book and do we know that
mumble higher himolla when he was a young child, basically two, three years old, he lost his
eyesight, he became blind, and many people basically would have in the past on Allah. Today, if
you're blind, your life is really the polygon those who are blind too far. But in the past, you
know, 1000 years ago, if you're blind, what were your prospects, you couldn't do anything, you're
basically going to be invalid your entire life. And his mom his dad also died, so he was like an
orphan. And so his mom would make constantly dewater hundreds upon gadget that our last panel
		

			accuses some and so not only Allah kill him and returned his eyesight, but he had a photographic
memory after that, after that when he could see he would memorize everything he saw. And that is why
he became Imam Ramallah and instill this to our, of his of his mother. And so no matter how
difficult the situation is, the art of appearance, especially appearance is so blessed and so
mobarak and a grandparent that insha Allah is going to be enough to grant your child the best of the
union of animals under bless us and our families and our children. I mean, just like lajitas Allah
sent them hammered while earlier so have yourselves Salaam was sending from Nairobi. alameen