Muhammad Salah – Fiqh Of Love Episode #21 Family Financial Rights 2

			Salam aleikum to Allah who have been a cartoon. My name is John Fontaine and welcome back to the
fifth of love. Today we're joined again with Dr. Muhammad salah. Sorry, I'm sure why Luke combs
Salam wa rahmatullah wa barakatu. How are you, John Alhamdulillah I love you for the sake of Allah.
Thank you. I have Becca LADEE. Got Danny fi design the one whom you love me for his sake love you as
well, Amin. So share. In the last episode, we were speaking about the rights of the spouse. And we
started with the rights or the financial rights of the woman or the wife. And in this episode, I
wanted to speak about the non financial rights if that's possible. So what
		

			are the some of the non financial rights that the wife has? Smilla Rahmanir Rahim in the beginning,
I would like to remind you as well as our viewers, that is the second episode that we're discussing
the rights of the wife. So we're talking a lot about the rights of the wife. And we started off with
the rights of the wife, not the rights of the husband. So when we come to speak about the rights of
the husband, I want the wives to bear with us. Yeah, okay. So, how many episodes
		

			live the rights of the husband Misha as many episodes as that will make you happy.
		

			In surah, Nisa, chapter number four, and number 19.
		

			The Almighty Allah says who is your own Neville Morrow
		

			and mashallah is to live with them honorably, to treat them with honor, with respect, not just
respect with honor. She's your little queen. Why is your Ohana Bill Monroe? And that covers every
aspect of life the way you call her the way you deal with her the way you address her before people
and if you have kids before kids and even between you and her in the privacy of your bedroom. So the
prophets Allah Allah Allah Salaam and he's a prophet Salah Salem used to give his wives like a
spoiled name. So our Isha used to call her I wish okay, it's perfectly Halal to call your wife as
per name that she likes. Okay. Then the ISA is for inquiry to more Hoonah fossa and Takahashi N word
		

			allah lofi Heilung Tefera sim, a earnable 9019 of surah. And he said women chapter.
		

			So he said, You got to live with your wives honorably, treat them with honor, with utmost respect
with love and care. Then he said, and in case
		

			if you dislike them
		

			faster and Takahashi and you may dislike something, whether it's a wife, whether it's a husband,
whether it's a walk, business or anything,
		

			whether Allah Allah who you hire and Kathira and that particular thing, which you now you dislike
Allah and they bring out of it, plenty of goodness. So it is not the time being, sometimes the
person is upset with his spouse or with her spouse for an incident for a mistake that happened or
she was embarrassed in public or in front of people and immediately he or she will demand divorce.
No, no, no come down. This is only one thing. There are plenty of other things. And the sound
Hadith. Rasool Allah is Allah Allah Allah cinema said La Jolla for a minute and Leia frog Jonnie, a
believer should not hate his wife. And also a wife should not hate our husband entirely. Obviously,
		

			each one of us have some errors, mistakes, and you know what? I'm full of mistakes. So why do you
only pick on my mistakes? Why do you only point fingers to my drawbacks? Don't you like anything
else? Don't you appreciate anything else? Don't you like my food? Don't you like the way I dress?
Didn't you like the fact that I'm very sweet? I'm kind. I'm quiet. I serve your parents. I help you
with your work. I'm a believer. I pray and I offer my my a bad and I'm a devout worshiper. So there
is a long list of it.
		

			comes when you have the checklist and you find just a couple of things, while there are other
beautiful things, plenty of privileges and you know positive things. So focus on what is positive
and this is for both the husband and the wife. So, in many of the marriage counseling cases, I find
the couple are having an issue over one or two things, not really too many things. And if these two
items can be eliminated or handled or taken care of, they will live a happy life. So, the Prophet
sallallahu Allah selama said, you should not hate your spouse simply for one thing or two or three,
look at what is positive so, if you have a checklist of the positive things, you will find them
		

			plenty Masha Allah, and that would make you turn a blind eye and act if you did not see what
displeases you pretend negligence. The Prophet sallallahu sallam said in the Hadith, which would
assist the husband to comprehend what I was just saying earlier. It's also been Nyssa hyaluron. So
he enjoined on meant to be kind and good to the wives. Why is it for in the Honda Holyoake naman
Bella in ours, because a woman is created from a bent rep.
		

			Many people think this is something negative. And one of our men on Wi Fi, it is a Yeah, you're
right. You are created from a crooked rip.
		

			It is not like that.
		

			As a matter of fact, describing the RIP have been bent, or taking that shape fits perfectly its job
in order to protect the lungs. If the rib was straight, he won't fit in your chest. So Allah
subhanaw taala created everyone with certain features among the features of women being emotional.
So she needs to hear sweet words. She needs some assurance, comfort and her he said Why aren't you
Hoonah been maruf? I shall Radi Allahu anha
		

			says I remember when I was looking from my apartment, you know her room used to open the door would
open to the masjid. So she was looking at a show an exhibition, which was offered by the abbey
seniors they were playing with the daggers and spears. Okay, a military show. And that was in the
mission.
		

			And the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam was covered in her with his clock, and she was dressed in her
shin over the Prophet shoulder. And the prophets Allah said, I'm gonna say, is that enough? She
says, No, I want to see more.
		

			Wait for some more. And the Prophet salallahu Salam would wait, and would wait until she said Hollis
enough. Then I Aisha Radi Allahu anha narrated that and she will say Takuro Lee injuria T Hadith at
a senior kodra. So you gotta appreciate that young girls like to have fun. When a husband,
especially if there is, you know, some difference in the age He's a little older than her. So he is
a wise man. He's a CEO of the company, he wants to treat the wife like his suite in one of his
employees, everything is on time I want to walk in on a firefight in the food on the table, and it
must be warm at this kind of temperature and all of that. No, this is not like, you know, work. This
		

			is home. There must be love, compassion.
		

			The kind treatment between both. So even from from this hadith, you mentioned this example. This was
even kind of public affection as well.
		

			You know, like did the public, you know, this was in public, right? So people could actually see.
Absolutely, you know,
		

			if the Islam teaches us, that if a husband and wife are having an issue with each other,
		

			it should not be taken outside their bedroom. I didn't say outside that house, outside the bedroom.
So the Prophet sallallahu Sallam says Al headrow should be only Phil Medaka Jani, if worse comes to
worst, and you're really upset with each other or you're upset with her. So you're sharing bed, but
you turned to the other side, you will give her your back. This is the Hydra that the Quran refer
to. You don't go outside. You don't speak to your colleagues. And you could speak to your parents
and your siblings. My wife did this and this and this and that because guess what? You and your wife
and similarly, the sister, the how the wife, you and your husband, eventually were reconciled. But
		

			the people whom you shared with all the
		

			negatives, they will not forget that. And every time they meet your spouse, they will remember all
the negatives that you spoke about them. So this is just the general idea of the meaning of why she
ruhuna Bill Morrow, when almost selama was with the Prophet Salah Salem on bed, but she notes that
her menses started, so she slipped away. The Prophet SAW, Selim said, Come on over. Have you started
the menses? She said yes. He said, come back. And he took her under the cover again. And as I
mentioned earlier, the hug the cuddled and she says the he would do, he would kiss me even while I'm
fasting. You know. So there is
		

			there is no problem to do that. In addition to that the person the husband actually must pay
attention to the woman's need, the emotional need, the physical need, the physical desire, because
most men demand the rights in bed.
		

			There was just on this topic of the needs of the woman.
		

			I just remembered
		

			the story of when the Prophet salallahu Salam where he raced. Aisha, exactly. You know, and this is,
this is, you know, an event which happened during a journey. It was in one of the battles and the
Prophet salaallah Salaam was returning home. So the whole army is there. And the prophets, Allah
Salam takes our Isha far away, he Spears time to give her some fun. Not once, not twice, it happened
several times. And she caught it upon us twice, once, when she was traveling with him, along with
Muslims, and he raised with her. And she was a lot younger, slimmer, and she beat him. She won. then
several years later, as she grew up, and she put on some weight, and he said, Let's race. Just I'm
		

			gonna ask you, how many times do we tell our wives go for a walk? I mean, we'll go to the gym and we
exercise but we'll tell the wife, It's haram. You cannot go to the gym. You cannot wear those tight
clothes. So when was the last time you decided to take her for a walk to exercise or go to the park
early morning or over the weekend after you drop the kids to school?
		

			weekdays and you just walk and you checked and you talk Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam would be
praying at night, and between the Torah cause he would turn around if our Isha is awake. He would
have a chat with her. Like was with the rest of his wives sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So he raised
without Aisha, he let her watch the show and he was very patient with her.
		

			Sofia around the Allahu anha.
		

			Sophia was a short lady. And she wanted to ride on the back of the camel in the saddle. So Anna 70
Malik Ravi Allahu Allah narrated that he saw the Prophet sallallahu Sallam kneeling down and put in
one of his knees up so that she could step on his blessed knee in order to ride on the side. Right
on the back of the camera. Is any of us by any mean better than the prophets Allah Salam? Will this
incident lower his you know, status? Of course not. Just o'clock hashtag. So Subhan Allah is very
important. One of the rights of the wife is the husband has to be kind to his wife. And we're just
going to take a short break right now and we'll be right back after the break. Join us in a few
		

			minutes for the effects of love.
		

			Salam Alaikum Hello. Welcome back to the Feck of love. So I can show it from salaam John
rahmatullahi wa barakato. Sheikh you know some couples maybe the man maybe he goes out and he
studies maybe he goes to classes. I was actually studying even at university.
		

			You know, should he actually share this information with his wife? You know, what about her
education as well? It's one of the eyes of the wife upon her husband to teach her to educate her to
give her the chance to learn particularly about the deen because Allah Almighty said in Surah
taurine in number six. Yeah you Alladhina Mn O QU and fullcycle more Alikum Naraku Han Nasser al
Hijra. So you are as a family father, as a husband. You're not just responsible for yourself, to do
the good deeds and to avoid the Haram in order to enter heaven. No, you want your wife to be with
you. And in the future. When you have kids, you own your kids.
		

			To be with you as well. So the Prophet sallallahu Sallam provided his spouses with what is known as
continuous education, the Companions would come home and share with the Prophet salallahu idea
center, and they share with their wives, what the Prophet sallallahu Sallam taught them. And then
the women came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam.
		

			And they say the Rasool Allah
		

			that how can that mean attend the classes and learn and benefit and we don't enjoy that as much. We
want you to give us a day so that only women can get to learn from you and the Prophet sallallahu
sallam said, You guys get together and we'll we'll meet with you and he started meeting with them on
a regular basis to give the ladies a tally. That's why he said let them now Ima Allah in masajid. In
one incident, he said for a woman to pray at home is better. But on the other hand, he said for the
hospital, the way the guardian or whoever is in charge, you should not prevent women from going to
the machine is going to go into the machine. It's not only about attending the prayer Taleem classes
		

			courses sessions, nowadays Masha Allah with the electronic Dawa the distant learning the courses
online, the husband should encourage his wife to attend such classes, even pay for her potions and
classes in order to learn. She learns she becomes a better believer, he becomes a better believer,
the children become better as well. What about some wives who are expecting, you know, the husband
to pay for a PhD or something like that? He's not he's not required to do that. But if you can
afford it, and if it is needed, why not? You see, we say, oh, some wives or say that I read
somewhere that the husband must hire a maid for the wife could read it, if he can afford it. But if
		

			he is struggling to survive, he can barely put bread on the table in Surah, two Pelican and number
seven, Allah Almighty says Leon do Sati min Sati one whom Allah subhanaw taala made him prosper and
has plenty of money he should spend accordingly. Get a driver garage affair, get a maid gotta cook,
fine. So she is a queen at home, just wear makeup and enjoy your time, attend classes go out go
shopping, but if the man cannot afford it, and most men are like that, most people middle class or
low class or under the poverty line, they are just making it. So the wife should not push the
husband to the edge or actually make him end up earning unlawfully in order to satisfy her needs. So
		

			you're talking about you know, maybe if he can afford it, he can you know, he can help her with her
studies. Painful to study, why not, you know, even if he was to have maybe three or four wives,
three or four wives and you know, the wife gets suspicious or jealous. How does he actually helped
with this, when the Quran limited the number of plural wives because before Islam, it was unlimited.
In any religion before Islam is was unlimited. And neither the Bible nor the Torah have ever
addressed this matter only the Quran which limited the number, but Allah subhanaw taala says, For
LM, daddy love our header, so he has he said one or two or three or four. But in case that you
		

			you're afraid, or you assume that you're not going to be fair, in treating them fairly as far as
time and spending, then one is enough. And you should stick to one. So the furnace in dealing with a
co wives is concerning. The time that you spend with them. The money that you spend on them.
Everyone based on their needs. This one have kids this one doesn't have based on their needs. But
when it comes to love, affection and emotions, no one has any control over that. You know what? Even
with your own kids, you may like one of them more than the others. Right? Yeah. Why? Because of so
many reasons. Love is in the heart. So sometimes without reason you're like, you have Miami Apsara
		

			you have an S you have but you like and us more than anybody else? Or do you like Sarah more than
anybody else? Or because one of them is the youngest? Or one of them is the Shane, the same feeling
with you. So you cannot actually control your emotions when it comes to whom you love more. As long
as when it comes to the treatment. You're fair. So that is perfectly okay. See, when you speak about
fair treatment, you see,
		

			you know, are we talking about equality or justice? Because of course, one wife may have four
children and well my wife may not have any children, you know, so did he both get a four bedroom
house for instance? As I said, Everyone based on their needs. Yeah, exactly.
		

			So, you know, sometimes
		

			some husbands, maybe they travel a lot, maybe they go to work or even dour, or you know, maybe they
they don't see their wife for a few months. Okay, is this permissible? And what races a woman have
for this? For a man? You know how some people say that I want to marry sure another one. Why he says
because Allah give me strength and I have this sexual desire which I cannot satisfy with my with one
wife. You got to also keep in mind that the women have also physical needs must be fulfilled. And
that's why it was our top may Allah be pleased with him who said that a man should not stay away
from his wife for more than six months, based on a very interesting incident that happened before
		

			him. So he started investigating, and he decided and he issued the verdict. Any Mujahid any Muslim
was going, joining the army, going to any battlefield or for training, should not stay away from his
wife more than six months. Why because women to have needs so that you would not, you know, leave
them without the attention of their physical needs or pay attention to their physical needs shake.
I've heard some people say that after six months, then the merge is is finished. Notice my true
manager marriage is not finished automatically. Just shake in Islam.
		

			You know, in the Quran, he speaks about beating the wife. And sometimes this is misunderstood and
used by non Muslims to try to say that, like men are allowed to be of their wives. What's the
correct understanding of this? The correct understanding
		

			is very obvious. From the explanations of Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam himself. When he said,
Well, I have the reboiler in one who lays his hand on his wife is Nikki.
		

			And in another Hadith, he said, Those who be the wives are the worst of people. Because some wives
came to the Prophet sallallahu Sallam complaining, he said, Allah Iike sharara come, they are the
worst of you, those who lay their hands on their wives. When a woman came to the Prophet sallallahu
Sallam asking him I have two proposals. This guy and this guy, one of them was by the name of Abuja,
the Prophet sallallahu sallam said, As for this guy, Lai Allah wa sallahu, Antarctica, this guy is
always cutting his stick, I wouldn't advise you to marry him, why because he is known of beating
people. So he is not necessarily aggressive, by he is not the kind of person whom you would think
		

			that he is, you know, very kind. And even if you differ with him, he would never lift a finger or
lay his hand on you. So the Prophet sallallahu Sallam advised her not to marry this person, because
of the season. So the understanding of people that they have the right to the Prophet salallahu
Alaihe Salam.
		

			As a shout out the Alana said he never beaten a woman or a servant never laid his hand on only on
the battlefield when he has to fight otherwise. And and he's our role model. Why don't you follow
Him? So now we reconcile this with some of the I have the crime when he says the loss and I'm when
somebody beats his wife, like he's beaten a slave, then he calls her for bed, what kind of a man is
this? You know, what do you exhibit? What kind of relationship is this? When Abdullayev now bear
solidly Allah and was explaining the idea of number 34
		

			of surah. And he said, you referring to well let into her phone and she was the one variable Hoonah
WA, Jerome Neff in my budget was very Wuhan. So the stages of free, consoling and fixing the marital
issues. If you think that your wife is misbehaving is doing something wrong, and it's something
terrible, the advice then I'll see her when we come to speak about the husbands wives and we discuss
the ayat and the Hadith and disregard a wife would make certain that she wants to please Allah and
that will be through making certain that her husband is happy. As long as he's not asking for
anything weird or strange. Then ever wanna, if we frequently study together, some of those are
		

			Hadees like, one of the most pleasant moments is when you and your wife or if you can have a chance
to you your wife and kids open the book of Fredo Salah Hain and study chapter by chapter, the 40
Hadith, or study that the fear of the short is and you're just reading from the book for them.
You're educating each other all of you, you know, you're right.
		

			and your limitations. Were Juru who Nephin Maharaja and the Prophet Salah Salem says, The next
stage, and it's like escalating, to turn around to give you back to her in bed, and all of that
because she's done something terrible. Or she's not listening. Okay.
		

			Loretta had your LFL bite, and do not step outside the house or outside your bedroom and show people
that you're not talking to your wife. Then the third is the discipline. And what are the live now
best says, the use of the miswak or the toothbrush, it is not the beating in a sense of, you know,
hitting, no, it's a sign of disapproval. Yet, the prophets Allah Allah, Allah senemo says the best
of all of you is the one who's best to his wife. And I'm the one I'm indeed I'm the one who's based
on my wife has never ever laid his hand on any of his wives or any woman at all. Just her show.
That's all we have time for today. So thank you again for joining us on this show. And for those of
		

			you at home, please make sure you tune in next time and we will be covering the rights of the
spouse. And next next time we're actually going to be going into the race. It's like you're telling
them not to attend your
		

			make sure you attend the next episode each hour. That's all we have time for the thick of love a
Solomonic conference Allah he will back out