Muhammad Salah – Fiqh Of Love Episode #20 Family Financial Rights

			Salam aleikum. Hello. My name is John Fontaine and welcome back to a brand new episode of the fake
of love. I'm joined here today with Dr. Muhammad Salah Scirocco, Shia y equals Salam wa rahmatullah
wa barakatu. You look happy today. No, subhanAllah it's just been an emotional ride so far, you
know, the whole series and
		

			we've got a very interesting topic coming up for today. Sure. So today
		

			I wanted to speak to you regarding the rights of the spouse, and specifically today I want to touch
upon the rights of the woman or the bride.
		

			They asked you why do you begin with the woman or the wife because you know, ladies first I'll tell
you why hold we begin with the eyes of the wives. First of all, because Allah subhanho wa Taala
stated in the Quran in surah, Al Baqarah, second second chapter of the Quran and number 228, what a
Hoon, Miss LADEE Allah hinda Bill maruf.
		

			This gives the perfect balance between the rights and duties, not only of the wife, but the wife and
the husband. Alana, the pronoun refers to the wives the feminine. So Allah Almighty says wives, they
have dues similar to those which are due upon them. They have rights which are similar to the
obligations which are due upon them. Likewise, for men, they have rights and the obligations they're
espouses. So Allah subhanaw taala began by saying Lohana for the wives, they have
		

			rights, they have dues. So in this case, we'll begin by discussing
		

			those rights, which the wife deserves to be paid on falling from the husband beginning with the
financial rights. And again, why do we begin with the financial rights not any other rights, the
protection the love the affection, because the financial right is actually is the actual beginning
because it takes place even before the marriage contract, and before consummating the marriage,
which is secure in the gallery. I know I spoke about it before in an episode discussing the gallery
and all the outcome of the gallery. But it's okay to remind the viewers that the delivery is the
first of the financial rights which the husband owes to the wife whether immediately or if they
		

			agree to defer the entire dowry or certain amount of debt
		

			in the last in the episode where we actually spoke about marine a lot more depth. You also said
there is a debt you know, and it should be paid off as soon as possible correct?
		

			Well, I'm gonna miss Lydia Allah hinda been model the first slide we see the financial right the
dowry Allah subhanaw taala says, in Surah Nisa will add to Nisa saw Ducati in Nagla.
		

			We already agreed to that. Then there is the isas for improving Allah Kumaun che in Minho, nevsun
for Kulu, honey and Maria.
		

			And
		

			this segment of the eye shows that when the wife collects the dowry, they becomes hers.
		

			And neither the parents of the bride nor the husband have the right to ask her anything of this
dowry. It's hers. So the IS is important Anna Comanche and men on have said, if the wife decides to
remit some of the dowry, or foregoes or gives you a part of the dowry as a gift, then enjoy it. It's
Halal Kulu, honey and Marie and with pleasure. What if she doesn't? This is now her position. You
cannot say but I am the one who gave you the money or the money was a compensation for agreeing to
marry that sabak And it has become hers. The wedding gift and it's refundable. Is not refundable.
And that's why sometimes when a couple gets married, and the husband happened to buy a lot of
		

			jewelry for the bride, and that is perceived as a part of the dowry order delivery. Then
		

			he was at that he's in need, he wants to start a project he wants to buy a car. So he says honey can
I take a
		

			loan from you. What I don't have I only have good, okay, can I take apart of that? And Insha Allah,
as soon as I possess the amount I will pay you back or pay off your shirt, so she will give him
whatever. Many people take this money, and they never return it assuming that were one. Yes, you're
one. But when it comes to the financial position, everyone is independent. You see, this is
important here because in especially in a non Muslim society, especially where I'm from England, you
know, when people become married, their finances, like you say they want. But you're saying that in
an Islamic life that you should always be separate. Not like what you're saying, but I'm talking
		

			about, I have a position. This position has nothing to do with your position, when they have a joint
account, or the wife can go to the grocery store or pay the bills and the utilities. This is great.
But the man is working and she is working or the man is working alone, and she has an access to the
account. Now we're talking about the woman's position, the wives position, let's say that she
inherited something from her dad or mom or uncle. This inheritance is hers is hers. It is not for
all of them. So if she willingly wants to give you a part of that, or all of that as a gift, that's
fine.
		

			But if you decided to take a part of it as a loan, then it's a loan which you must settle once you
are capable to pay it off. Okay, yeah, there is a meaning of it and terminal akkermansia in men
rough Sampha Kulu. Hania Marie, if she doesn't give you any, then it's not us. If she remits part of
it, or if she gives you a part as a gift, or if she gives you a loan, then you have the loan you
have to pay off. If it is a gift, enjoy this is Hello without putting any pressure on her. Then
among the financial rights is enough, aka
		

			Vemma and fuck woman and Wiley him. The man happens to be the guardian of the family and the family
father. Why?
		

			One of the reasons as Allah subhanaw taala said he has given this guardianship because he's in
charge of supporting the family financially. So he works he earns, he puts bread on the table, and
he delivers wherever the house is in need for again, Bill Maher off. Bill Maher roof means on a
reasonable basis. So somebody's income is 20 grams, and Masha Allah the house spends three or four
or five, he can afford it. But somebody's earning is 2020 100 and houses in need for 3000 We're not
going to kill them, we're not going to ask him to steal, we're not going to ask him to, you know, to
accept bribery in order to, you know, to make up or to come up with the difference, then the House
		

			have to squeeze itself in order to live in accordance with the income of the husband. So the word
will Morrow means on reasonable basis. Well, and mono Dilla, who is gonna work eastward to Hoonah
Bill Maher off, and mahmudullah Who here refers to the father of the child. Now the couple have a
child who's in charge for covering the expenses and mallu the law the Father, and he's supposed to
provide for the mother is supposed to provide for the child and whatever the mother needs of
clothing, of medications, of hospital bills, you know, a food of formula milk, whatever. This is all
the duty of the husband to make available and to work hard to make available. What does isa again,
		

			what are the mohu de la hora is gonna work is what one bill ma roof. So you do not put somebody to
the edge or keep demanding things you know that the husband can afford. And by the end, you're just
literally forcing him to steal or forcing him in some societies to take his life because he cannot
afford it. Do not push him to the edge Subhan Allah is very interested in SubhanAllah. So the
husband has to take care of her needs he has to spend on the wife. And when you're seeing it depends
on the individual, of course, also in different cultures, you know, people and also different levels
of living as well, because some people are more poor, some people are richer.
		

			So what about I mean, this is kind of a late question really, because maybe I should have asked this
earlier on in the series. What do you think? What do you think about marrying into different
cultures?
		

			and different, older say classes but you know, marry someone who's maybe financially financial, you
know somebody who's financially better off. You remember who said that if I'm a rich person and I
find a guy who is very good, very righteous, educated, but he is not as well. As much as well as our
family for innocence, I wouldn't mind asking him to marry my daughter, because his plus is something
good to add to the family. Again, if the daughter agrees, and if she's happy with that with her
consent. So in this case, I'm not going to ask him to squeeze himself or push him to the edge in
order to come up with a certain amount of money to make her live in the same standard he cannot
		

			afford it. And from the beginning, I know that he cannot afford it. Unless if I give him a job and
increase his salary, that is something different. The blame will be on the person who have the means
and he is kind of tight, he's cheap or miser. So we'll turn around and we'll say to the wife she has
already even to take from his wealth and his money like he leaves money at home or in the safe take
whatever is sufficient for you and your kids.
		

			The Prophet sallallahu Sallam used in this regard the term Alma woof again, okay on reasonable
basis, a woman by the name hende, who's our Sophie Aaron's wife, after they both accepted Islam
		

			and the Prophet sallallahu sallam was teaching women the etiquette of being a good wife and being
dutiful to her husband. And she got up and she said Dr. Rasool Allah, in Ms. Sophia Raju Loon, Shahi
my husband, I was Sophia and it's kind of tight. So is it permissible to take from his money, he
doesn't give me enough money for myself and my kids? So is it okay to take from his money without
his knowledge? Would that be considered stealing the prophets, Allah Salam said, No, take whatever
is sufficient for you, and your kids, Bill Maher roof, not to buy a diamond ring. But because you
need to buy food, medication, pay the bills, school, tuitions wherever is reasonably sufficient for
		

			you and your kids to the floor Hashem, we're just gonna take a short break.
		

			So join us after the break in a couple of minutes, the effects of love ceremony.
		

			Salam Alaikum salam. My name is John Fantana. Welcome back to the effect of love. In this episode
share, we're discussing the rights of the spouse. And specifically we're speaking about the rights
of the woman. Just before the break was actually speaking, you mentioned a very interesting Hadith
actually, where they were the prophets Islam was asked regarding mulatos If the woman needed needed
some money, and if she took some of the wealth from her husband, obviously a reasonable reasonable
amount of wealth, that this wouldn't be classed as steal it? No, because it is obligatory upon him
to provide for the family
		

			providing enough Shake what about if the husband was to take some of her wealth without her knowing
that is stealing that steal? Why?
		

			Because the wife is not required to support the family financially. And unlike almost to give this
typical example of in case that ask one have
		

			plenty of money, that he pays a cow on a regular basis on this money, it is a cattle and his wife is
poor. Can he give her a part of this occur? The answer is no. Because whatever the wife needs, is do
upon him.
		

			So he will end up becoming a beneficiary of this ACA that he pays which is not permissible. On the
other hand, if the wife is wealthy and she pays a cat, and the husband is poor, he is laid off, he
doesn't have a job, he cannot afford to support the family. Can she give him a sadaqa for her
wealth? That is permissible? Why is it permissible in this case, because she is not required to
support the family financially. She is not required to buy clothes for the husband. She's not
required to put bread on the table and buy food for the family or pay for the tuitions of the school
for the kids. That is not her job. She has other duties that will be discussed in sha Allah in the
		

			next episode, but his duties among them is the financial duty which is the dowry supporting the
family financially and so on. So other than financial duties, what are the
		

			raised as a woman
		

			from I would still say that it is considered among the financial rights which is the housing. Okay?
		

			In sort of Pollock, the Almighty Allah says asking one man Hi, so second to me odd come.
		

			So the man is supposed to provide the housing, whether it is a rental property or a property that he
owns. I mean, who would love to have a nice place like that to live and he comes back from work and
they take a dip in the pool, and lunch will be ready and the maids are fixing the food picking up
the table. But if I don't have We're just filming here.
		

			We're just sitting in the place just to clarify, this isn't your I mean, it's very shallow
		

			will be much better than that. Okay. But after we finish, you and I are going to little, our little
tiny flats Alhamdulillah shiplap. Even if it is little tiny, if it is filled with happiness, then it
is very spacious and roomy. But if a place is as vicious as this finish or even more with a couple
of fighting, and every one is accusing the other and pointing fingers, no matter how big, how
spacious, how roomy is their bedroom, maybe it's a suite, with Jacuzzi and all of that, but it's
held. So the person understands that it is not that pace or the place which will create happiness is
actually maintaining, maintaining love between the couple. And if it is not love than being God
		

			fearing and the Hadith, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he says
		

			that was in the Federalist speech. Like he was wrapping up his mission by saying and he was
addressing men. It duckula Finisar or people fear Allah and TBO duty to Him. A respect of women.
		

			When it comes to your wives, daughters, sisters moms, feel a Allah concerning them. And then he
specifically mentioned the wives. Is it a nakoma? Hustle Munna the Emanuela was the halal to follow
Jonah became Atilla Obeah dilla. And that means, you know it has been has been made lawful for you
to sleep with them, and get intimate with them only because you have taken them with a promise from
Allah. When you propose then there was a JB and Kaboul and agreement in he said, according to the
book of Allah, and according to the guidance and the Sunnah of Rasulullah sallallahu Salah. So
that's a promise. And that's a vow that you're going to treat her kindly. In the light of this
		

			guidance, will this guidance is teaching us to be kind to them, to teach them whatever is necessary
of the deen of Allah to be good Muslim wives, good Muslim parents and mothers. Okay, that is your
duty as well. To be protective, not to expose them to any harm to make certain that your house is
happy. And again, Happiness isn't only due to financial capacity or affordability, no one was spoke
about asking or Hoonah min height or second to me Modi do come from the beginning if you can afford
it, then she should have her independent housing. The prophets Allah Allah Allah said had how many
wives at a time had mine. He did not put two in one apartment,
		

			each one in her apartment. And we receive lot of complaints. A lot of sisters feel depressed and
feel oppressed due to the fact that when he got married in the beginning, he was very sweet and
promising. Now she says I'm just a maid, to his family, not only to the parents, but to the ELO's.
His brothers and sisters are made, though they hire that mate, but without paying me they just feed
me that is not permissible. Subhanallah so she she has the right to her own accommodation. Exactly.
And that should be actually you know, it's understood, but unfortunately due to the fact that in
some cultures, this is not very clear. So that should be stipulated from the beginning. My daughter
		

			should have her own accommodation. Your family your parents should visit anytime they are your
family. Okay? What was the arrangement or the wife so that she maybe she's ready to receive them.
She's feeling well, tomorrow is a finance for the kids and she's
		

			In studying with them, and then all your brothers and sisters, nephews and nieces don't come to
visit. That is not right. There should be communication between you and her. She is not feeling when
she's sick. She cannot cook for this whole gathering. Well, if you're going to cater the food or the
food from outside, fine, but if she's going to use her, must be with the arrangement with her. When
a woman has her own accommodation, she feels much safer. And she is more given and she likes to
decorate the house, clean up the house take care of doubt. She decides what her husband or
consultant against what are you going to eat today? What would you like me to cook for you today?
		

			Versus when she is used as a servant? Somebody is dictating to her. You gotta do this. You gotta do
that. We're cooking this today. What happened yesterday, and she doesn't have a say, ASCII no one
mean how to second to me emoji. It doesn't have to be a big place according to what you can afford
shake. What about the emotional needs of a wife? Of course, we spoke about the financial needs but
more emotional. The Prophet sallallahu Sallam is our own mother, no doubt, right. And he said in the
Hadith Salallahu Alaihe, salam, hydrocodone, hydrocodone,
		

			hydrocodone, clearly, the best of you is the one who's best to his wife, and I am the best of my
wife. This is what the prophets Allah Allah, Allah Salah mercy. I want to give you a couple of
examples to see the emotional rights and how the Prophet sallallahu Sallam fulfilled them in the
best possible way.
		

			Almost Elena's daughter,
		

			we said before almost lost her husband, and she had a bunch of kids. So after the eighth there was
over the Prophet salaallah Salah proposal, she said, yeah rasool Allah, I'm an old woman, and a
bunch of kids. He said, Well, your kids will be my kids. And that is the main reason why the Prophet
Salah Salem would marry I would do with a bunch of kids, while every young woman would desire the
Prophet sallallahu Sallam to take her as a wife. But the prophets Allah Allah Salah and marriages
were for reasons and wisdoms. So her daughter said that, almost selama her mom when she got her
period used to wrap themselves with certain close, so that they will not spoil the place and so on.
		

			And the Prophet sallallahu Sallam realized that she got her period, and she distant herself. She
doesn't want to
		

			come close to the Prophet sallallahu Sallam assuming that she is an estate of the menses, that he
would not be interested in her. Then the Prophet sallallahu Sallam called her and he said, Have you
gotten your menses? She said yes, he said, Come, come, don't worry about it. And he took her under
his cover and the cuddled together. And she said that the Prophet sallahu wa salam used to kiss her
while fasting. And whenever he entered the house, he would kiss his wife, and before leaving, even
for the Salah, would kiss his wife, and we'll learn from that, that kissing the ones wife or hugging
one's wife does not invalidate the the wudu so the wives of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam were
		

			telling us that the prophets Allah Salam was the best and the most ideal husband, even though they
were multiple wives, you know, take for innocence when our Aisha Radi Allahu anha was asked, how was
the Prophet sallallahu Sallam at home? How was the Prophet salallahu Salam atto look, I can let our
Isha talk and read to us. And we have a whole program, a whole series. Just explaining and
discussing and sharing what our Isha said about the Prophet sallallahu Sallam as a husband. She
said, Can I gonna hit Matteoli? Isn't this more than sufficient? He was always serving his wife and
his family, taking care of the gate, cleaning up his shoes, patching his clothes. So when his
		

			clothes, clean him and his assistant, his wife, and she says, Well, the Allah on her might the
Prophet sallallahu Sallam would stand up praying, and he would recite a longer citation. And then
between the two rockers, he would turn around. Aisha is asleep in one corner of the room.
		

			And he would look at her I wish with a spoon name. Are you awake? And if I'm awake, he will have a
chat with me. Then he will resume his prayer salatu salam. This is a man who's running the affair of
the greatest OMA Subhanallah but he does not forget about his wives. We all have problems at work at
school in the street. When it comes to home. The wife have emotional rights, you have to pay
attention to just Sokoloff * of hellos beautiful
		

			points you made the supply is very important.
		

			and it is o'clock Hershey. Thank you for joining us because that's all we have time for on this
particular episode. So Paula, beautiful points which the shake has mentioned. I hope we can actually
learn from them and take some benefit from them. Join us next time for another episode of the fit of
love as Sara Marie Corsola he will barakato