Mirza Yawar Baig – Islamic Manners #08

			Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa salatu salam ala Rasulillah Mia Eva
mousseline
		

			Madhu rasool Allah is Allah Allahu Allahu Allah, Allah He was seldom does even cathedral cathedral,
Hama Babu, my brothers and sisters, I am probably
		

			back backtracking a little bit
		

			on the manner of conversation on
		

			to the art of listening and I think that's very important.
		

			So the chef says so as if a person starts telling you something, whether you're alone or in the
company of others, something that you already know very well, you should pretend as if you do not
know it, do not rush to reveal your knowledge or to interfere with the speech. Instead, show your
attention and concentration. The Honorable Davi Imam at Abbey, Abbey Raba, he said, a young man will
tell me something that I may have heard before he was born.
		

			Nonetheless, I listened to him as if I had never heard it before.
		

			Now on the sat on a side note from myself, I also tried to do this for a couple of reasons. One is,
because you don't want to embarrass the other person, especially with elderly people, we have a
issue with memory. And we short term memory is not good, long term memory is good, which means that
the incident itself which we are talking about, remember very clearly, but whether or not I told you
this thing before I would not remember. So
		

			I usually start by saying, I hope I have not told you this before, if I did, please stop me. But
never stop the person never do that. And if somebody just tells you something, even though they may
not have this preamble of, you know, if I
		

			if I if you heard this before, as well, doesn't matter.
		

			Act as if you are hearing it for the first time. Because this is from the beautification of manners.
This is from keeping the dignity of the individual. And usually it's elderly people, because, you
know, people of your father's age, grandfather's age and so on grandparents
		

			keeping their dignity and remember, they will come when you will have the same thing. And at that
time somebody says, Have I said it before, it's a you This is told this told us this 20 times before
No, this is very rude, do not show that you know something. The second reason why i
		

			i Do not interrupt people, especially now the the incident that
		

			should have Shehata robot said
		

			if a young person tells me something, and I've noticed,
		

			another good reason is because I may know the incident itself, which the person is talking about.
But if I listen to the young person narrating that incident, I'm getting a lot of information about
how they see today,
		

			how that incident appears to them or appeals to them or does not appeal to them today. And that is
very good feedback in in terms of learning to know the new generation, the present generation, the
current generation, so that you will not get just from the story. So yes, I know the story. But
		

			let me listen to this person telling me the same story in the manner in which this person tells me
that story will tell me something about the story. So I think this is another very important reason
to listen to people even though you may have heard the story before.
		

			To continue, Khalid bin Salman Al Tamimi, who frequented the courts of the two Khalifa as Omar bin
Abdulaziz and a sham. When Abdul Malik he said if a person tells you something you have heard before
or knew that you already learned do not interrupt him to exhibit your knowledge to those present.
This is rude and ill mannered.
		

			Also, it is a form of RIA of showing off
		

			the honorable Imam Abdullah bin Wahab hora de el mas three a companion of Imam Malika lays even
Assad and Allah authority. He said some times a person will tell me a story that I've heard before
his parents got married.
		

			Yet I listened to it as if I have never heard it before. Eva I even love Junaid
		

			Raja Lolly Lally with rain, all these people may limit visitors he said a wise man said to his son
learn the art of listening as you learn the art of speaking and this is something so critically
important. And this has never taught this is the problem. Lots of public speaking classes and so on
and so forth. And you know how to do this how to do that but
		

			the
		

			the key thing is not to
		

			I
		

			mean, obviously, you know, let us say
		

			public speaking is important. I won't say it's not important, but much more important than public
speaking, is listening. Because listening gives you a sense of what the what the the world is trying
to say to you what what the person was speaking to what they're really trying to say to you. And
this is a key influence and a key should be a key influence in what you say to the person.
		

			Listening while may means maintaining eye contact, allowing the speaker to finish the sentence, and
restating your urge to interrupt the speech
		

			I'll have is unhealthy will bother the he said in a * in a poem, never interrupt a talk, though
you know it inside out. So, these are some important things in terms of listening.
		

			To other things I want to mention one is
		

			to listen, to be able to actually listen here listening is different from hearing, hearing is just
the sound, you know, entering your years
		

			listening is to understand that is to
		

			is to benefit from it. That happens if you do two things. One is if we
		

			have a genuine interest in what is being said. So this interest sometimes happens automatically
other times it has to be manufactured. So be very clear, have genuine interest in what is being
said. So that's the first part of listening. And the second part of listening is to
		

			tell yourself that, and the second part relates to the first part, how will you develop a genuine
interest by telling yourself that it is entirely likely very possible that I will benefit from this
statement.
		

			And this is the truth. I mean, of course you will benefit from the statement is just that we need
to, you know, sort of sort of convinced ourselves. So make sure that we listen and listen carefully.
And then we take the net, we take it forward, right. And you will be surprised how much you will
actually benefit. If you listen carefully. Then we come to discussions and debates.
		

			Here the sheriff says if you have trouble understanding some of what has been said in a meeting,
hold your questions until the speaker has finished.
		

			The best way to do that is to keep notes. Because if you don't keep notes, then the chances are that
you will
		

			that you will, you know
		

			you will forget what was said and all you will be misunderstood. You misunderstand it because you
forget it. And this is something which is obviously very detrimental. So make sure that you keep
notes. And then at the end, you ask questions. Now the important thing is that many times
		

			we
		

			we
		

			when we keep notes, way, many times what happens is that we
		

			the speaker for example, I'm sorry, I'm getting interrupted.
		

			Many times the speaker will say please stop me at any time. Ask me whatever you want. Now, if it's
the kind of workshop format, that is okay. But usually if it is not a workshop format, if it is a
		

			if it's a lecture that even if the speakers have stopped me, don't stop them because it breaks their
line of thinking that their line of speech, keep notes and then at the end of the speech, you say,
Well, you know, this is what you said, and this is my question. So it's very, it's not just polite,
it's also you know, it's good to to understand what was being said many times also what happens and
I've seen this many times in my own experience.
		

			A question may arise, but five minutes later, that question gets answered in the same speech because
the speaker would have would cover that area. So they may not even be necessary to ask the question
at all. So be very clear. And then he says gently, politely and with a proper introduction, ask for
clarification. Do not interrupt a person's speech. never raise your voice with a question or be
blunt to draw attention to yourself. This is contrary to the proper manner of listening and it stirs
up contempt. However, this is not the rule of the meat if the meeting is for Study and Learning. As
I said, if it's a workshop, it's if it's a class that's different than you can ask. In such a case
		

			asking questions and initiating a discussion is desirable, but must be conducted respectfully and
tactfully only after the speaker finishes
		

			Khalifa al Mahmoud. He said discussion and trenches knowledge much more than mere agreement and hate
them if they are the great scholar historian remember the court of for Khalifa Abu Jafar, Al Mysore,
Al Mahdi, Al Hadi, and our machines, he said, It is
		

			ill mannered to overwhelm someone while speaking and to interrupt him before he ends his talk.
		

			If a colleague did not understand an issue and asked a scholar or an elder to explain, you should
listen to what is being said. The repeated explanation may give you additional insights to what you
already know never utter a any word belittling your colleague, nor allow Your face to betray such
attitude. When an elder or scholar speaks. Listen attentively, never busy yourself with a talk or
discussion with other colleagues. Do not let your mind wander elsewhere. Keep it focused on what is
being said. never interrupt a speaker never rush to answer if you are not very confident of your
answer. Never argue about something you do not know. Never argue for the sake of argument. Never
		

			show arrogance with your counterparts especially if they hold a different opinion. Do not switch the
argument to belittle your opponent's views if their misunderstanding becomes evident. Do not review
or scold them. Be modest, unkind. A boy once said who could be who could get me a friend who if I
offend will remain calm, who will listen or listen intently to what I have to say when he knows it
better than I do.
		

			Was a lot Alana will carry while he was away it may be wrong try