Hosai Mojaddidi – Learning to Rely on Allah Lesson + Q&A
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AI: Transcript ©
Okay, that sounds like I'm once again, like I'm set out to have a
glare. But to get to again, just like your left hand system, we're
gonna split it up. I don't even have the level. So that should be
even more sorry and say that I will know that or have you been on
civil law, it was seldom on any recycling center Sleeman kathira.
So,
before I begin, I do have slides. So I've shared that and we can
bring that up soon. But also, I wanted to, I forgot to say
something in the previous session, which is the way that we write and
actually say the word inshallah is really important as well.
Sometimes if we write it as though there's two words or, you know, as
one word actually can change the meaning. And this was surprising
for me, because for many years, like so many of us, I was writing
it like I SHA, Allah, right apostrophe, Allah, and I didn't
even think twice about it, until my teacher actually shumsa pointed
out that it was incorrect. And this is again to, you know, humble
us, because sometimes we we don't understand we if you haven't
studied, you know, Arabic grammar or the meanings of things, you may
just do things because you see it everywhere and repeated and it's
written, but we have to seek to understand. So he explained to me
that when you write it as two words, right, in sha Allah, it's
completely Storting. The meaning, because it's actually three
separate words. And so that does make an impact. So just a an
advice for all to remember that when you look at the grammar,
right, the meaning is if God wills or if you know, God willing,
right, so the first word in is what they call chef do, which is a
conditional. And that's why it has to be separated so that you're
reading it as three separate words, right. And then share is an
active past tense verb, which is willing, right? And then Allah, of
course, is the is modality, which is the Exalted Name of Allah, and
he's the doer of the action. So putting it in that formula in sha
Allah is the correct way. And you'll find many people warning of
not writing it, whether it's in English or Arabic, as two separate
words, because the meaning of in Shatta Wale as one word, right,
when you say it is, as one word in sha, Allah is like to create, so
it actually changes the entire meaning of the phrase. So this is
just something that we want to be mindful of when we're writing it
to separate the three words, in English and in Arabic. So in sha
Allah, and there's actually a really great paper, I saw
reference to this just because I wanted to confirm certain things,
but this was, maybe I can put up the it's called, if you just did a
quick search for, like the importance of insha Allah or the
difference between inshallah and and the other way that it's
usually written, you'll see actually many people, I think
they've used the same source on their blogs or their websites to
cite this important difference in Arabic grammar. So it's just an
important lesson I learned I benefited from and I hope that
benefits you. But Inshallah, can you see my slides? I'm not sure.
But I my slides are up. So if we can display them, that would be
wonderful. Okay, thank you. Alhamdulillah. So here we are at
this idea. And again, I chose it because it's a it's a word that we
say so often. And it's a short phrase, but there's so much power
in this phrase, because it shapes again, our reality and then our
experience of reality, right? So I wanted to explore this idea a
little bit more specifically, this concept of the power of words. And
so this is just to remind us, that the power of words, one of my
favorite quotes, is from Chicago, my teacher, and this is again,
you'll if you do a quote, search for any of his quotes, you'll see
this come up, often, but there's just so much meaning in this,
which, again, is in line with the talk today. Don't ever diminish
the power of words because words move hearts and then hearts move
limbs. So words even when they're short phrases like Al Hamdulillah,
sublime, Subhan, Allah Allahu Akbar, we may not feel the weight
of them, but they're how many Hadith do we have actually,
literally tell us the weight of these words, right? That you know,
when you say subhanallah for example, that there will be trees
planted for you then right or that if you say certain of cotton dua
that they that they will remove all of your sins, even if they you
know are reaching the foam of the ocean. I mean, words clearly have
power in our deen and even when you're reflecting on different
verses, we're less proud of that it says that had he revealed right
they'll put on his words upon the mountains they would have
crumbled. So what is this telling us that words have are either for
positive or negative? Right? But we need to draw from obviously the
best of words which is the Calam Allah that the words of the of
Allah soprano data. And so I wanted to just share some some
more on this topic of the power of words. And I don't know how many
of you are familiar with this. This was pretty eye opening for me
and I shared it with my students earlier too. That you know, our
world is shaped by obviously words. I mean,
It's how we communicate as human beings and what sets us apart from
other creation is that we are able to, we have language, right? It's
a very big part of our creation that differentiates us from the
animals and others. So the fact that we've entered this world or
we are in this world, and actually probably from the beginning of
time, words have been used as tools, right as tools of either
discussion or, or, or positive instruction and guidance. But
we're in a in an era right now, where our politicians and people
in power have absolutely exploited this concept called the illusion
of truth effect. And you'll see this in many different areas where
people who researched the way that human beings retain information
and also, the way that we are realities are shaped, have come to
understand that if things are repeated, often enough, regardless
of their truth, they will be accepted by the individual. And
this is why propaganda exists. So why a lot of us have been duped by
many people, unfortunately, whether it's, again, politically
or otherwise, is because they know that if they start to repeat
things over and over, regardless of whether or not it's true, that
it will, we will believe it. And that's just quite shocking. And I
mean, it shouldn't shock us, but I think it should, in a way that we
understand that people there are people that don't have the best of
intentions that will manipulate words, in order to, to basically
you know, manipulate us and so we need to be then on guard, but then
we also need to appreciate it for me what the realization was, is
yes, obviously our deen teaches us that we are this realm is the
realm of where evil occurs where people disappoint you or people
hurt you. And certainly where there are those people that that
will use whatever tricks and means that they can to hurt us. But I
think what also made me appreciate is the fact that our Dean places
such a high priority on language and knowledge and really deriving
or meaning from things right that we we don't look at these as, you
know, unimportant or, or we they have immense weight for us. And
when I think about, you know how, again, the words that we expose
ourselves to, I don't know how many of you are familiar with this
Japanese? Doctor, I think his name is Dr. Matsuo. But he's done a
couple of really awesome experiments. One, he did it on
water, where he, you would look at the way that water crystallizes,
based on the words that are expressed upon that water, right.
So he had different cups, and he would arrange them and then upon
each cup, he would say certain words, and he was trying to just
see basically does is this possible can words spoken actually
have an effect on water. And in fact, he found looking at the
microscopic pictures, and there's YouTube videos of this experiment
everywhere. But he found that when positive words were being spoken
upon the water, the words were crystallizing in these really
beautiful ways, right. Whereas with negative words, they were
they didn't they have distorted the word that the crystallization
of the water was just coming out, misshapen and not beautiful. And
so that was one experiment. And then he did another experiment
with rice, where he took two mason jars of rice cooked rice. And upon
one of them, he wrote, you know, I think he wrote you full. And then
the other one, it was something positive, thank you, or something
just more positive. And in both the outcome was that after 30 days
of having students speak these words upon these mason jars of
rice, that the one that was spoken to, you know, with the with the
harsh words, you fool, turned it in, molded, it became this black
gelatinous, slimy mess, with mold, and then the other one was
preserved and fluffy, just like it was the day it was cooked. So he
was showing that yes, words actually do impact us and, and so,
you know, the fact that, you know, these, these experiments exists,
and also just that we see the impact in our own the way that we
communicate with one another right? If someone insults you,
obviously, it's going to hurt you. It's going to, it's going to maybe
ruin your entire day, how many of us have been impacted because
someone said a single thing negatively to us or the opposite,
that a positive word can completely not just affect our
mood, but actually save our life. You know, there's been so many
stories, there's that one, I think, Kevin has it James I can't
remember his last name, but he was he's now very famous speaker and
he was suicidal at one point and he his challenge for the day that
he decided to end his life was that if he was you know, he was in
San Francisco and he was taking the bus and he was interacting
with different strangers. And he said if any one person stopped me
to actually I
asked me how I am and check on me I won't take my own life, I won't
do it that was sort of like the challenge for himself. So he goes
about the day, not a single person asked him, and he committed to
what he was doing, he actually jumped from the Golden Gate
Bridge, which is, you know, the bridge that they call it a suicide
bridge, all the villa, he jumps and he survived by sheer again,
the will of Allah subhanaw taala. He survived a fall that note very
few people have ever survived, it's that fall a bit of a fall.
And how did he survive Subhanallah his entire, all of his bones were
pretty much fractured or broken. But Allah sent these seals or sea
lions, I think, to him, to rescue him literally lift his body and
bring him to Safe Harbor and passage. And then he survived. And
he promised, He said that when he jumped, that he realized his
mistake, and he basically in it in that moment, it's all happening so
rapidly, but he promised that if he survived that fall, that he
would spend the rest of his life saving people from, you know,
suicide and depression and what have you. And he's gone on to do
that. So we've had a lot. So words have immense power. And I think,
when we hear these stories, right from from, you know, such a, you
know, examples like that, or this these experiments, we have to
truly appreciate that they do, in fact, shape our perspective. And
so, you know, the way that we look at the world, the lens with which
we look at the world, what are those that we are either taking in
and absorbing, and that is shaping our worldview, or they were
negative because, you know, I like to use this analogy, the
kaleidoscope. If you look at the picture on the left, that's a
kaleidoscope, but it's you know, it's a very, it's not a pleasant,
the most pleasant, you know, view, you look through that it's kind of
disjointed, it doesn't look very pleasant, it's black and white. So
there's not much beauty or color to it. It's still a view, you
know, and that can be your worldview, or the way that you
communicate, it can be that black and white kind of matter of fact,
way of being, or it can be more beautiful and more colorful, which
is the image on the right, and this will then shape your reality
right and this is also confirmed for us in the Hadith. Carlos
Carlos says, I'm the Veni Abdi V, I am in the opinion of my servant.
So if we have the best opinion of all US Prophet, I will use the
most positive words, in attributes to understand him through or to
speak of him, we praise Him, we call upon Him, then our reality
will be shaped by those words. So in fact, the words the DUA is the
weapon of the believer. All of this is signaling to us to not
minimize or diminish words, but to actually see their power and hear
let's find those also directing us to make sure that we have our
priorities set or right, right, because the perspective you have
will shape your reality seek the home of the Hereafter. Of course,
always father has the most perfect board. So he is directors that we
need to shift our focus away from this lowly place. Because this is
a place where again, pain and hardship and tribulation exists,
suffering exists, but to seek our final abode in the hereafter. So
he's, he's directing us through words, he's, he's, you know, he's
reminding us to, to use, you know, the power of language to really
derive meaning, because that'll shape again, our perspective, and
then our reality. So if you're an individual, and you understand
truly, that this place is not your file, a vote that you are not
going to last year, but it is a place of suffering, and you start
to really understand these words, then you work toward the alpha,
right, which is what the quote that we read at the beginning was
or two that don't diminish the power of words, because the words
are what moves the heart and the hearts move the lens. So once you
have that right accurate on your team, then you're going to be
infused with the faith and the taqwa that then directs your
actions and you start to actually work toward the right goal, which
is not the dunya it's the hereafter, right? But at the same
time, he's reminding us don't forget your share of the world. So
have the right perspective, a healthy, balanced perspective. And
this is again, reminding us we are not an OMA of dreams, we're an OMA
of balance so in everything we do we need to seek the balance,
right? We're supposed to be that middle nation that we're people
who are falling into the extremes can look to and say hey, they're
doing something right. But when we fall into extremes, when we make
those extreme claims or extreme statements in either direction,
some people go you know, a little too far to the right or to the to
the left, and I'm not speaking politically but that could apply.
But just in general, when we're in extremes in our perspectives or in
extremes in the way that we speak in the in the extremes of the way
that we operate. It is it's um, it's unwise, and it's certainly
harmful to ourselves and also to others. So, we have to look again
to the words that Allah subhanaw that is using to direct us and he
tells us repeatedly be a people of balance right. And and what does
that mean again, avoid the
extremes Don't be polarized so don't use polarizing language and
and in a very practical application of this in your
relationships you know, being in all are nonsense if you're
speaking in ultimatums, if you're speaking in language that is so
strong that it's, it's, you know, pushes people away from you then
learned this is not our way that is not appropriate for a believer
to make claims or to make threats. And to use harsh to use language
again in that weaponized way. Just because you want certain outcomes.
Rather practice, what we are taught in the full character of
our beloved ally said, um, and what we're being directed to
Bilaspur that our Creator, which is be balanced, remember, you
don't hold power, so stop you know deluding yourself. Power is with
Allah subhana wa Tada have humility, seek true justice
through him, don't serve just yourself. So all of this would be
encompassed in a very balanced and healthy worldview. But that
worldview is shaped by again, the language that we use, and that we
understand and the reasoning that we do from that language. And
again, the problem was, it reminds us to follow the straight path
don't follow other paths, there's going to be a lot of messages. And
this is the era of information. There are a lot of words being
articulated and spread and shared. We get bombarded with articles and
emails, text messages, and WhatsApp groups and all of this
information flooding us constantly. But we have to be
vigilant to know who is really telling us the truth, whose words
are distorted and deceptive and manipulative, and whose words are
not. And there's no comparison, or a loss of half of the promises in
every single thing our deen teaches us is for our betterment
every single thing, what we do and what we don't do, and whereas
nobody else on the planet can, can, can make that claim nobody,
because there's always ulterior motives human beings are, we're
flawed. So we would clearly, you know, we can use language to
manipulate for other than good, and it happens all the time. So if
you become that person whose reality is very crystal clear,
which is I'm only I'm going to put my trust in taka and Allah and the
Prophet says, I'm going to follow what I'm taught to follow. And I'm
not going to look at any other messages competing in any way with
my Lord, then clearly your perspective is healthy. And that
is going to again, determine your outcome by an Andy then the RTB,
Allah will confirm for you that that faith that you haven't Him,
He will show you and he'll make this moral much horrible, will
just simply don't have the capacity to deal with the dunya.
Because they are given false understanding of what the world is
false promises, false expectations, entitlement, this is
not the place to exact justice, we shouldn't seek justice in this
world, because it's not the place for justice, justice will come
with what we seek from this world as a result of our last panel
data. And that may require us to be patient, instead of seeking to
force things, it may require us to just, again, to differ and to to
wait for Allah subhanaw taala to show us the way instead of forcing
our own way, but that is, again, all shaped by whether or not we're
taking in the right understanding and the right message. And there's
just too many pathways of information. And so this is why
words matter. And why even as we've said something as simple as
insha, Allah should not be underscored is very powerful. And
our deen is has a tremendous, I mean, it's just an endless
treasure trove of depth that we have to explore. So more to say,
but let's continue. And this is just, you know, some perspective
on on that balance that we were speaking of, because it's a harsh
place. So we also have to, you know, console ourselves that we're
not always going to get it right, you know, as much as we try and we
should try, we're not always gonna get it right. So here's the
beautiful Hadith where one of the Sahaba came to the Prophet lies to
them. And he just basically was giving the truth, real talk, like,
when we're in your presence, and we're reminded of all these
things, everything seems to be fine where, or our faith is
intact, and we're strong. But then as soon as we go away from you,
and we go back to the world, you know, which is our families and
everything else, the business and all the things that we get wrapped
up in, then we are forgetful and the prophesy said I'm beautifully
using words. So it's all the hearts and this is why words are
so important. For all of us to think of mind we're not expected
to be perfect, we're expected to strive toward perfection, but not
to be perfect, right? But he tells us He tells us to have a year by
him in whose hand is my soul, if your state of mind remains the
same as it is in my presence, and you are always occupied with the
remembrance of Allah, then the angels will shake your hands and
your beds and roads Oh hands on a rather time rather time should be
devoted to this and time should be devoted to that. So this is again
reminding us of the balance that yes, we have those lofty goals and
aspirations but at the same time, we need to be realistic
Stick and find the balance and not to, you know, go into the
extremes, which is what again many of us fall into. And that's why we
are in the states that we're in where we're not planning properly,
we're not thinking about these things. So this is the power of
planning. So I'm just going to try to zip through the rest of this,
because it does, I think, practical perspective, just to
give us all some advice on how can we plan to use words and to help
us shape our perspective and into success? Because then what were we
should all strive for? Right? We want success. So emotional
regulation, you know, words, as I mentioned before, are so powerful,
and that they can impact us, they can impact us, whether it's from
other people from ourselves, the voices, the voice in our head,
that is, which is so important, excuse me to pay attention to the
stream of consciousness, what are the words that are being heated in
your mind? And what is you know, we have the concept of the four
hot that which are the four sources of thoughts or
inspiration, right? So what is what is making the up the bulk of
the thoughts that are being repeated in your mind? Is it the
words of Allah subhanaw? taala? Is it the reminders of Allah subhanaw
taala, the beautiful reminders of the prophesy so them that are you
know, that you are, whether you have, you know, tools on your
phone, or that you read every day, that you're very diligent and
you're very intentional to constantly fill your cup to fill
your vessel with really positive words, are you doing that? Or is
it you know, that you're reading nonsense and garbage and, you
know, social media or tabloid nonsense, or you're just involved
in these conversations with individuals who might not, you
know, have the best intentions. And we have to keep in mind,
right, that the profit lesson reminds us that, that the bulk of
the sins of the son of Adam come from the tongue, that it's our
tongue that gets in the most trouble. So sometimes we are
trends, having these transactions every single day with so many
people, whether it's family, friends, our children, our
friends, our neighbors, strangers on the internet, and we're not
even thinking about, you know, how is that shaping my mind? And then
how is that impacting me. So emotional regulation is really
important. But again, it requires us to pay attention to that self
awareness. Because if we're not aware of all of these things that
we've talked about, then it's going to affect our state. And the
state that many of us find ourselves in, in these depressive
states. And these hopeless states are coming from a lack of
awareness or vigilance around these things of what is what am I
consuming? What is coming in to this vessel of my heart and
shaping my perspective? In my mind? What are those words? Are
they damaging or otherwise? So, you know, what is emotional
regulation? It is to it, there's three components to it. It's
initiating actions that are triggered by emotions, inhibiting
actions triggered by emotions, modulating responses. So there's
three ways of emotionally regulating yourself, right? That
you are very mindful of what's triggering you, right? And you're
also mindful to not let those triggers happen, and then to
basically you know, manage those those those reactions. And so how
do we do that? Well, we got to, first of all, again, this is where
we pay attention to reality. Because if your perspective is
right, then you know, that there are certain things that we are
given, there's certain emotions that we feel, and that that are
part and parcel of being a human being. And you have to know how to
regulate those emotions in a time and place for everything, right,
there's emotions have utility to them. And so just realizing, yes,
this world is a place of anxiety. That's why the prophets have
sought protection for badness and anxiety, but we have to be
resilient. So there's all these emotions that we should be very
well versed in and literate in, but also understand that there are
things that we can control right, because maybe those emotions are
being triggered by events by people, but there are certain
things that we can control and what are they we can control our
knifes our thoughts, right, our words, again, going back to the
importance of the power of words, our beliefs, our prayers, I mean,
I was speaking to my students earlier about this whole topic and
I said to cut if if we just really understood the wisdom of Allah
subhanaw taala giving us the five daily prayers spreading them out,
and then the repetition right because as we talked about, that,
you know, that this illusion of you know of
forgot the reference but but the you know, what I mentioned
earlier, that that truth right can be that if you repeat something
often enough, it'll solidify your your truth, right, what your
meaning is, so just think of the wisdom that every single day we
are asked to repeat over and over again, there's, and there's a
certain I mean, there's it's beautiful because obviously it's
the perfect words of Allah subhanaw taala. But I was thinking
that it would be so enging
required us to pray, but each prayer had to be unique, right?
And I was thinking, what a gift that He's given us the action of
prayer, right? Because there's a great benefit in repetition,
right? That we are infusing our bodies, our souls with all that
positive energy. Because these are the perfect words of Allah, we
know that the words of Allah or Shiva, so he's giving us that
every single day. It's like a dosage, right medicine that we are
taking, where you don't even realize the effects of it, but
they are affecting us, they're benefiting us. But then he also
made it easy to do, because once you do something often enough, it
just becomes much more easier. But if it was, the opposite was the
case, right? Just imagine if we had to stand up for prayer, every
five prayers, but we had to come up with original statements or
original prayers, and each prayer was different from the other, it
would be very difficult to do. So there's an immense in the
repetition in and of itself, you know, just by virtue of repeating
these perfect words of Allah subhanaw taala. But it also is
very empowering. Because, again, if you, you know, go back to that
those experiments that we talked about, to infuse your spirit, your
body or soul, your mind, with, with words that are positive, has
an effect, right? But we take it up a notch, this isn't just
positive, these are perfect words. Right? Which is why we ask, you
know, ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada, why we're also you know, the some of
the doors that we say, we're always reminded that Allah spa,
those words are the most perfect words or we ask Allah protection
from the evil in his creation from his most perfect words. So he's
giving us the best of words to, to help us cope with this dunya it's
a it's a very difficult place. But these are the things that if we
really tapped into their power, then we wouldn't just stand up for
prayer, robotically, not thinking about what we're doing, we would
see the immense drama, the immense wisdom, the immense just joy of,
of being able to call on our Lord with his most perfect words,
because we're, of course, we're limited, we don't have the ability
to do that. And then to benefit have that residual benefit
throughout the day, every single day for the rest of our lives.
While the rest of the world you know, just think of the fragility
think of the way that our world is, you know, that we the things
that are the events that we see emerging almost every single day.
I haven't I don't think I've gone a day where I haven't seen a news
story. That is just more and more evidence of how destructive life
was that is right. Because every day something will come out where
it's like, wow, these people are this individual. Literally,
they're missing god, they're missing the all of this. They're
missing the power of knowing who Allah subhanaw taala is, you know,
I was telling my students about, about something that I saw the
other day yesterday or the day before, of his high school
students who came together just to have like this kind of like a
dance off. I think it was between two different cheerleading squads,
and everything seemed to be fine. The parents are recording from the
stands, and everything seems fine. And all of a sudden it breaks out
into this horrible Brawl where these people are everybody's just
sick of dogpile of fighting. And you're like, what happened because
someone got triggered. Maybe someone said something, someone
did something. But that triggering effect that emotional control we
give to other people, you know, comes from this lacking lacking
things that build your resilience and build your fortification that
help you to not be so affected by other people to see ignorance for
what it is to not, you know, take on other people's, you know,
worldviews or other people's impressions or other people's
whatever estimations of you as though that they're true. It this
is what Islam gives us. This is what you know why our deen is such
a gift. And we have to really appreciate it. But all these
things always find that it's telling us He's given us the power
to control when we give you know, and we give from our whether it's
our wealth or our time, or even good counsel. So how long were
rewarded, you give a compliment to someone Allah doesn't shortchange
you. Those words are waiting to illustrate that Adina NSCI SEIU,
you remove the burden of another muscle, it's one of the greatest
things you can do to remove the burdens and how do you do that
with a smile or just beautiful kind words? encouraging words. So
when we support each other, all of these things are things that are
quite empowering potations, or reactions, these are things that
we can control. And then our dollars, obviously, you know, I
mentioned earlier was the weapon of the believer, many of us are in
the States, we're in everything into the pot. That's simple as it
is, we're not tapping into the power of the law. I can't tell you
how many people I have been, you know, who have approached me with
problems in their life real serious problems, whether it's
their marriages or their children, financially, and many of them upon
further investigation. I'll ask them all you know, how many you
know, how are you doing? Guys? Are you waking up? Are you doing the
hygiene? Are you praying? Are you doing these things? And sometimes
they're like, No, I apparently can pray. I'm not really good at my
prayers and they'll make a lot of excuses for why they're not
praying and I'm like, Well, you need this is again where the
perspective is off. If you believe that
Your circumstances are going to change miraculously overnight,
just because you're seeking other means to fix your problems. And
you're not going to do directly to the source of all goodness, right
and actually asking petitioning your creator for change, then
you're missing, you're missing, you know, the point of your
existence. So we are empowered with words and doors are at the
top of what we need to really be using more. And, you know, and to
remember, you know, the prophesy said and said, he said, not
harmful, I know material that I feel the pain, which is, I fear,
nothing for my OMA except for the weakness of certainty, right, that
we would be weak, in our opinion with Allah, that we would actually
start to question whether or not certain things can happen, because
there's a weakness of our certainty in God. And that is
really unfortunately, what's happened. And why is it happened
is because there's other competing ideas, and we've actually given
those competing ideas Wait, right, and which is so tragic, if you
think about it, the Creator of the heavens, and everything in
creation, is is telling us that the best way to get what you want
is to seek and we don't seek him, but we seek people, or we seek
other needs, or we seek our own selves, some of us are too
overconfident in our own abilities. And we don't turn to
the only one who could change our circumstances. And so this is the
delusion but all of us shaped again, by our whatever's shaping
our perspectives, which usually falls into the category of the
language that is being infused, or that we're absorbing. So feelings
of all these things, we have the power to control, right? That is,
absolutely, it's the Hallmark quality of a believer, if you
don't have a debt, if you don't speak, well, considerate of other
people, what what are we doing? These are you we're missing,
again, the point of prophetic character learning about his life
and Sierra is the best way to learn is to embody his
characteristics. So Adam is very important. And you'll see a lot of
people nowadays, minimizing, oh, what's the point of that, and they
kind of almost mock the emphasis on other this is terrible. And you
know, may Allah forgive? Those of you who even would ever say
something like that, to kind of make a mockery out of people who
put a high price on other, but we are people of other Bucha be
people who are not, then we need to examine the language that we're
using, and why we speak without, you know, these filters, if we're
going to go and put all these filters on our face to try to
present ourselves so beautifully to the world, but then exhibit the
ugliness of bad character. What good is that doing anybody. So the
priority is to actually show up with beautiful character. And
that's true, beautiful dishes, other beliefs, sincerity, all of
these things are in our control, and then what we can't control and
this is where, again, the power of words comes into play, we have to
have some real talk, some of us have been given the wrong
understanding. Some of us have been given false hope, or a false,
you know, expectations. And that's where our reality isn't matching
up with what we're expecting, and we fall apart. Oh, I did it. And
it didn't my marriage didn't work out. Therefore, I'm doomed. No,
you did. It's the Hata asking Allah subhanaw taala to give you
hate and dunya and Ashra, you did not do this, the hotter as this
magical, you know, abracadabra, Word, you know, spell that then
gives you every single thing that you want in life. That's not the
dawn of staccato. So your perspective is off. You're
petitioning Oh, was poppin. And the dog was kind of saying, y'all
Allah, if it's good for me, and sometimes a difficult marriage is
actually good for you. Sometimes you're put in a difficult
marriage, because it's a mirror for you to see the ugliness that
is rotting your soul that maybe you're oblivious to. Because the
spouse is a person who can and I'm not talking about abusive
marriages, by the way, I want to be very clear, I'm not talking
about abusive marriages, I'm talking about a marriage where
there's incompatibility, a marriage where maybe, you know,
your your spouse is, is showing you, you know, yourself or sign up
to can. So sometimes that's the purpose of going through a
difficult marriage. And if the marriage ends up, not, you know,
dissolving, then you can't look at it as Oh, that was not an answer
to my stuff on it. And what is this? And now your whole faith
isn't kept, you know, in doubt, no, you look at it, like, what did
I ask? I also want this created for me, and maybe I needed to see
some of those things. Maybe I learned more about myself in that
marriage. Maybe I had a child or children out of that marriage. And
that was hard for me. So this is how we can, you know, really shape
our perspective. But a lot of this comes down to again, the language
understanding the way that we're interpreting things, the power
knifes, we're not gonna be able to control everything that happens in
dunya, we're not going to be able to control the knifes in the sense
that desires you know, come up and sometimes we we, I mean, we should
be able to but sometimes those desires are just part of our test,
right? So we have to be able to realize that that
You know, some people are tested in certain things and other people
are in other things. And that's just part of the human experience
shake on he'll come and remember shit on also uses words, right
he's the uswest he's the one who whispers. So he is also part of
this whole, you know human experiment that we can't ignore
that he will also use words to infect our hearts with ideas and
distort our perceptions. So we have to be vigilant about the
words that we are, that we are, you know, using or infusing in our
hearts to combat his negativity and his false narrative or his
lies. So we also can't control them their words, their actions,
we also can't control the responsive dog, right? Because
there's a hadith I don't have it here. But where the Prophet SAW
Selim says that, you know, there are many people who will make dua,
but the reason why they're DWIs and answered is because they put a
timer on it. This is also a problem. And this comes from this
very distorted worldview where everything is so transactional and
instant gratification that you expect everything to go your way
just because again, you willed it, you know, I wanted it, I ordered
it, it should come in the mail, you know, where's my Amazon order?
It's supposed to come here, I have prime. And so we get this kind of
mindset that everything is just come when I want it. And when it
doesn't, what, what does that do? It affects your feed, what have
you forgotten losing control? Do you do you need to be reminded,
just because you want it doesn't mean anything. If you're really
trusting your Lord, and you're referring to his knowledge over
your own, then put it out in the universe, be sincere, know that he
has your best interests in mind, if he gives it to you, Al
Hamdulillah, if you delete it Alhamdulillah if he gives it to
you in the next world of Hamdulillah, single case, you're
successful. So where's the problem? The problem is,
worldview. And that worldview is shaped by the words. So for the
outcomes, a lot of these things we have to just contend with. We
don't control outcomes, you can put a lot of effort into
something, but maybe it won't come out the way you wanted it to. Do
you trust a lot and ended any of the beat? Do you believe your
Creator has the best, you know, intentions for you and wants the
best for you? Do you believe that with every fiber of your being,
then have patients have beautiful patients with whatever you're
going through? This world is short, we're all going to be out
anyway. And in the next life, as the Hadith reminds us when that
when the man who suffered more than any other human being ever,
in the totality of the human experience, the one person who
suffered more than all of humanity, Allah subhanaw taala
dips him in Jannah for just a moment for just a second. And then
he asks him Did you suffer in the dunya and heal, I did not suffer?
That is Jenna, that's the hereafter that we're supposed to
be looking toward. And that's where our promises it's not in
this dunya so these are the types of messages words that we have to
be really not just reading and, and and, and, you know, thinking
over but absorbing into every single cell of our being. And
that's why, again, we're we have to be so grateful to our dean that
that teaches us to repeat, keep getting up for prayer, keep
getting up, you've read the Quran, already read it again, keep
reading it, what's stopping you? Is there anything else better than
reading the book of Allah and I say this to myself, as advice for
myself as well that we sometimes we forget that what is better than
having access to the words, the perfect words of our creative,
nothing, nothing is better. But the human being were so
delusional, right? And so the six useful skills and I know I'm
sorry, I probably way over time, let me actually check. Usually we
get we get warnings my way over time. Yep.
Okay, I'm sorry, I went off on so many tangents I apologize. But
this is the final piece I'll leave you with, in terms of, you know,
regulating our emotions, because I know a lot of us are dealing with
heavy things. But I just wanted to bring it back to the you know, the
power of words to our states are beings. And this is how we do it.
We have to be aware, we have to have mindfulness, we have to you
know, be able to cognitive reappraisal and be able to re
imagine things rethink things in their proper context. And that's
part of you know, what all of this is, is is what what, what our deen
teaches us is to understand things in their proper meanings, not the
distortions that then affect your perceptions to actually understand
them as almost not that intended them to be to be adaptable, to
have self compassion and to look for emotional support. A lot more
to say I'm sorry, we're gonna have to do a part to everyone but I'm
here for the q&a. Bismillah go ahead SR Roboto take it over
mashallah, thank you so much. I started Jose, you covered this, so
comprehensively, so I hope everyone appreciate it and really
benefited from it assisted, repulsive, we don't mind about
going over time. So they all really, really enjoyed it. And you
know, as you were talking, the idea that came to my mind about
words was you know, the is a good word is like a good tree with
roots firm and its branches in the sky. So, somehow that was like
Have a really profound conversation and topic on words
and and like all the ways that can affect us all the ways we can kind
of deal with them. And we had a lot of positive comments as well.
So without further ado, I'm just gonna go into the q&a because we
did get some questions.
So sister Kimberly asked
at SoCo, Mr. Jose, what are the four sources of thoughts that
you're referred to? Absolutely just like okay this is true
Kimberly. So the four are the, there whatever Neff say or sorry
however, Rabbani or however Molokini whether Neff Sani, and
how other shaytani which translation is, they are
inspirations or thoughts that are coming from almost kinda directly
to the human being. thoughts that come from the angelic realm,
right? The angels do actually communicate with us thoughts that
come emanate from the knifes our own internal dialogue or inner
dialogue, and then thoughts that come from the demonic realm
shaitan, which is the West Lissa. So these are the four streams of
inspiration or thoughts that come to the human being and everything
that we experience, everything that we're told to all the
messaging that we are bombarded with and be, you know, under one
of these four groups. So I hope that's clear. Thank you so much.
We just had a comment saying please do part two. So I think
everyone was going through every word, and they're really excited
to hear more about this topic. But just another question, you did
kind of talk about the situation a little bit in your talk, but
someone asked,
How much do you rely on, on yourself? And how much Allah? If
I'm angry at my husband? How much? How much should I speak up for
myself? And how much should I just leave the matter alone for a lot
to handle?
Excellent questions as I feel fit into the sister who asked,
obviously, you know, when we are put in those very difficult
situations, it is an opportunity to grow to better ourselves, but
we want to be in the right state of mind. So in the initial
aftermath of like a dispute with your spouse, maybe you're not
ready, you know, you're not ready. And I think this need sometimes
and this is where temperament theory is very helpful, because if
you understand temperament theory, you'll understand that some people
are very highly reactive people and they want to kind of do the
conflict resolution really quickly and other people need more time to
process. So if you know your temperament and you also know your
spouse's temperament, which you should, everybody should and also
your children, and everybody that you know, in life, you really
should know people's temperaments. It will help you to tailor your
reaction and your response according to what's appropriate
for that relationship. But if you yourself first of all, you know,
as we talked about, self awareness is the starting point. If you are
a person that needs a little bit more time to deliberate to
sickness, you have to gain perspective to maybe make dua
before you feel like you want to tackle something that's
complicated or heavy, do it don't fall into or don't be pulled into
sometimes we're pulled into altercations when we don't want to
have boundaries and be very clear with your spouse. Please give me
some time. I just need some time to think and if you're if your
spouse for example, is a type that wants to just get through the
confrontational very, you know there are those very domineering
personality types of sometimes we have to deal with but when
boundaries are in place and you know yourself and you can be
advocate yourself in that way, which says, Please give me some
time and then you turn to you turn to the last founder and that's
actually what we should always do in the event of any difficulty and
challenge is we first turn to Allah subhana wa Tada so to answer
your question, Allah first and then process you know, as we we
should, according to what is best for that circumstance. And there's
no one size fits all by the way, I really want to make this clear.
Your communication style is your style, right? Kind of like love
languages, we all know about love languages, but every single human
being has a different communication style and emotional
intelligence is when you learn to learn other people's communication
style and adapt and start to really find a common language that
brings your language and your in your interaction lucky or the
person that you're going to talk with what together so that it's a
common and mutual mutually beneficial exchange. So that's
what I would encourage you to do.
Thank you so much, Sarah, Jose.
One thing that you know, the audience really appreciated and
enjoyed was your explanation of how to type out inshallah.
A couple of people did ask, you know, how is it written they
wanted confirmation Someone asked, is the meaning chain if you put
the phrase into one word, is it still incorrect to write it like
this? So if you could, it's actually incorrect. It is
incorrect to write it as two words it's not insha. Allah in sha means
to create. So what you're saying is to create Allah is actually
wrong and dangerous and many scholars advise against writing it
that way and
They say that if you see it, you should correct it. Unfortunately,
again, people have, we're just doing things cut, paste, copy,
we're not really thinking through our choices. And I told you my
story, I was doing the same thing. Until 100. I was pointed out to
me, and then when I read even further, and let me see if I can
quickly, while maybe you are bringing up the next question, I
can find this website because I do think it was a very valuable write
up that this this person did, to that gives that gave me a lot of
this information that I was sharing with you today. But you
know, from what I have learned, so I'm gonna sorry, let me okay, let
me try to find out quickly.
For one second, is this one, just so we can? Yes, it should be in
three words in which is if SHA right willing, Allah God, so if
God willing, but separating the three in English and in Arabic, so
let me actually pull up this website because I feel like once
you see the way that sorry, one second, just give me a moment that
they have it. You'll it he does a very good explanation.
Is this the one? So yeah, if you can give me just a moment and I'm
with you and be distracted for a moment until I find this website.
Yep, no worries. While you are waiting, I'll read some praises
for you said
that I was dying to celebrate mercy team. We are blessed to have
such good Allama and they're coming to us from Mississauga,
Canada. I'm currently in Toronto, so it's always good to see some
Canadian thoughts. Were able to find the website. I did. And I
found it. I actually sent into city thoughts on WhatsApp, I'm
sorry, because I'm working on my phone. I have it on my phone, but
I can't seem to find it on. So here, I'm going to type it to you
in our private chat system without it if you can share it with
everyone else. That would be wonderful. So here it is. It's a
really good write up. I encourage everyone to read it. He does. He
does a beautiful breakdown. He actually has quite a lot
in there about versus men and that also speak of the word in chat and
show the distinction between the singular like inicia and in sha
Allah. So it's just a really well done write up and I would I would
definitely read that. I would encourage people to read that. And
show Mashallah. Thank you so much. We have another question. Maybe
this can be our final question. Samira said, How are we for fight?
Or neffs thoughts aren't any thoughts? Okay, that's a great
question. Just like
it's I'm sorry, Samir. Yeah. Samira sister Samira Great
question, you know, fighting the knifes is the eternal or the
sorry, the struggle, lifelong struggle, we're all in, we're all
going to be in this room, which I had enough is really what we do
every single day. It's not as easy as it may sound to do it is
difficult for that reason, but I would say the best thing to do
start to really pay attention to your thoughts, you know, I gave
you that structure of the four you know, hot that it just so that we
can start to understand, where's the information that we're
receiving? And that we're kind of repeating in our head? What is it
coming from? Can I source it back? Is this just enough? See thought?
Is it a shape Donek thought obviously, anything that causes to
evil would be shaytani or Neff? See because the knifes Believe it
or not, and this is sometimes shocking to people, but the knifes
is actually the greatest of all the evils. So you know, we have an
understanding that there are four evils, which is the dunya however,
the desire that fluctuates from the human being the shaitan
himself and then the knifes. So these are the four sources of
evil, but Allah man tell us that the neffs is the greatest of the
four. Why? Because into it, it's our mind, it's our it's our voice
in our head. So we're not thinking that it's going to, you know, call
us to something harmful, but it absolutely does it's really want
to in the correct way, it always seeks the easiest route. It's, it
wants to be always comfortable. So it'll prioritize its own comfort
above the right course of action. So childhood, first of all,
becoming very aware of the distinctions of how to discern
between the knifes and shaytaan is important. And the best way to do
that is to know the simple idea, which is anytime you have a new
thought that you've never done before, a new inspiration of evil,
that's a bliss, your bliss wants you to, you know, keep basically,
you know, falling. So he's going to
introduce ideas, new ideas that are harmful to you. But once you
habituate to something and you're just doing it all the time, that's
your enough, it's habituated to it. So that's the simple way of
differentiating an inspiration or a thought like if you're going to
do something that you've done before, you can't blame that on at
least right. So paying attention to those things and then to start
to look at, you know, I because I teach youth so I tried to come up
with visual guides or visual models of teach
doing. So I think the best thing that I came up with are kind of,
in my own trying to explain this to them we came up with it was
was, was to think of like your heart as this
is a pure vessel, right? It's pure, it's untainted. And a
similar analogy would be like if you had squeezed from the most
beautiful, you know, pomegranate all of its juice and nectar and
it's just so rich. It's so it's thick, it's beautiful. It's
delicious. It's got all of its just intact, right? It's
beautiful. It's perfect, right? And you have that in a vessel. But
then you started to take that pure substance, and slowly start to mix
it with water right over time, what's going to happen to it is,
are you going to even see any remnants of the juice anymore,
when you diluted so much? With everything else? Right? And what
do I mean with water. So the way I look at it is that ultimately
created our hearts as souls, then he gave us the great treasure of
his book and of the prophesy set him to teach and model ourselves
after. So we're spending a lot of time filling that vessel with this
purity, right. And also making sure that other thoughts and ideas
that are alien antithetical against our, the purity of our
faith are not allowed in, then we preserve the purity of our faith.
But what's happened is in the age of information, we have opened the
Pandora's box or the floodgates, whatever you want to call it.
There's too many ideas, too much information coming to us. We're
not gatekeeping or protecting our hearts. We're not vigilant over
our vessels. And so what's happening is, is we it's
confusing, and everybody's kind of walking around with all these
distortions, cognitive distortions, different ideas,
wrong ideas, wrong conceptions, too much traffic, the incoming
traffic needs to stop and I think once you pay attention to your
thoughts, and you realize like, Wow, all the television I'm
watching the music, I'm listening to the you know, the tabloid
stuff, people will spend hours online going through tick tock or
reading on their Kindle. You know, you see these people who are very
obsessed with certain genres of television, I mean, books, and
film, all of that is, is like diluting the purity of your heart.
It's just diluting that pure beautiful, you know, I use that
juice analogy, but like, think about it, what's going to remain
if you have all those ideas swimming around inside of you,
where is the kalam Allah, where is the Prophetic beauty that we're
taught where's it's going to be just lost in the ocean and the,
you know, the volume of all the other stuff that we're pouring
into it. So be vigilant about what you're pouring into that vessel,
and inshallah you will start to see, you gain mastery over your
next because when you are taking in those words of Allah subhanho,
the most perfect words of Allah and the prophesy centum, then that
has that ripple effect on a cellular level as we saw in those
experiments, realities, people's entire states can be transformed,
you know, because of the words of ALLAH SubhanA that is a sheets
called the Shiva for a reason. And there is on YouTube, just as a
quick last minute thing for my mother alive, somehow was sick in
the hospital, I was getting so much advice and one of my closest
friends Sharifa Ozma, my best friend, I would say, May Allah
bless her and increaser she shared with me some videos that were very
powerful about a physician in Pakistan, who is you know, he's a
very well known reputable doctor and he had patients with all these
different complications and he is a committed strong believer. He
really believes in Allah. And he started to see in his own
practice, why am I not using the Quran? Allah calls it a she fell
What am I doing? So he started incorporating the recitation of
the Quran as part of his therapy to his patients. And the results
were incredible. People were like a cancer was disappearing. A lot
of things he was like, we have to believe Allah is giving us all the
answers. It's our weakness of faith that we're not even using
the means that he's put forth but for us so we have to I think just
really appreciate the immense gift of being Muslim and having all of
just if we're not you know, benefiting from it that's because
of our own selves. It's not that there isn't power that we just are
not benefiting so we all guide us and and you know, and bring us
inshallah his healing and and really strengthen our faith
inshallah. I mean,
100 I call it gone away over today, and I'm sorry, I did not
mean to do that. No, not at all, though. I think it was meant to be
I think everyone benefited greatly from everything that you shared
with us today. I know I did for sure. I wanted to share this car
with my sister Rashida who served as a fellow here San Jose for the
gems upon
gems you shared with us. May Allah azza wa jal or reward you
abundantly and as well, you had a salon from our dear sister summer,
who said, so good to hear from you on Friday gems again. And actually
I wanted to share something with you here today. So Jose says from
Tarik and the entire celebrate mercy team, not this
this one happy birthday
we're so grateful I wanted to say that we're so
for your continued contribution to our programs, we pray that Allah
subhanaw taala continues to bless you with guidance and wisdom so
that you may continue to inspire generations to come on the path
path of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and made it a
plus the year for you and your family
man thank you that is so sweet and I was not expecting that sister
summer very we share birthdays around the same time her and
and I so we exchanged messages usually and so she messaged me
earlier today I saw it on my way here I haven't had a chance to
respond I did not expect that all of you knew that but thank you so
much. It's very kind of you may Allah reward all of you and me
which mean thank you. Thank you
I had some celebration emojis on this slide as well. But
unfortunately it didn't come up but just imagine
a lot of celebration.
It's really sweet. Thank you. Thank you everyone. Also since
it's I think her birthday too right summer. So we have like a
string of us that are all around the same time. It's an honor.
Thank you and
we have many comments here wishing you Happy birthday, masha Allah so
thank you so much. We all benefited greatly from the session
today. Everything that you shared, masha Allah, and we always look
forward to having you on this program. Zakho friend, and I'm so
sorry, I forgot to mention one last thing, and I promise I'll end
here. It's actually fitting because it is a DUA, but the
prophesies of them said and this is just to remind you again, the
power of words, he said the best remembrance is La Ilaha illa
Allah, and the best application is Alhamdulillah. So the point of you
know, all of this discussion that we had today is to never minimize
the words of Allah subhanaw taala even if we think they're just
short phrases, they hold immense weight and when we're taught, you
know, what is the best Vica to do to remember all those problems,
just say that I had a lot remember constantly God is one God is one
God has one as the most pleasing to Allah, and then to be in a
state of real gratitude on hamdulillah it's so powerful, it's
not just a word, it rolls off the tongue very nicely but it it
really is a state of being when you say it with the right
understanding. It should emanate from the heart where you're like
thank you, Allah Alhamdulillah sugar, thank you Allah for, for
everything for the gift of existence for the gift of being a
Muslim in the home of the best of creation. So a lot is sort of for
the gift of life and health and well being and family and loved
ones and all the opportunities that he gives us. Thank you, Your
Allah Thank you. Thank you, thank you. That is what that is. And if
it's not that, then get your heart to that place in sha Allah May
Allah guide us Joseph Morehead and forgive me again. For the time it
was an honor and a pleasure May Allah reward all of you so don't
want to go into what
they call it fell out of my hotel love ikata Thank you