Hosai Mojaddidi – Intentional Parenting No More Passive Parenting; Treat Your Teen as a Friend

			If you think you know, sending
your kids to school or dropping
		

			them off to a Sunday school and
you have all these other adults
		

			and all these other influencers,
helping raise your children is
		

			kind of okay because that's all
that you have, you can do. And,
		

			and you don't realize that they
need to supplement all of that,
		

			because a lot of it is out of your
control, you don't know what
		

			they're exposed to at school, even
in Sunday school, you have no idea
		

			what your kids are exposed to,
it's so important to strike a
		

			balance and say, for X amount of
hours, I don't talk to my kids, I
		

			don't know what's going on. I
don't know who they're talking to
		

			what they're learning, I have to
fill in the time that I have with
		

			them by connection and talking. So
please like when you're with them
		

			at the dinner table, as Dr. Reddy
has said or differentiated from
		

			me, when you're with them in those
spaces where you're actually with
		

			them physically, please don't
waste that time. Oh my God, that's
		

			like a horrible, it's squandering
valuable time that you have to
		

			actually get to know what is going
on with them. But if you're
		

			thinking, oh, you know, I'm just,
I'm being a good parent. I'm
		

			educating them, I'm sending them
here, I'm paying for this class,
		

			I'm paying for that, you know, I
got my, you know, my stripes as a
		

			parent. That's not enough. In the
teen years, you actually it's
		

			recommended that you you'd be
friend that you we wouldn't treat
		

			our friends that way, who treats
their friends that way where
		

			you're not even talking to them,
and you're distracted. When we're
		

			with our friends, we are with our
friends. And the advice is to
		

			treat your teens as your friends.
So be with them, talk to them, get
		

			to know them, and you will see the
demand dynamics in your family
		

			shift. But if you think I'm just
doing the basic bare minimum and
		

			doing this and doing that, and
outsourcing and outsourcing, and
		

			I'm a good cook, and I do this,
and that's enough and there's no
		

			conversation. You're this is this
is what's going to happen. You're
		

			gonna have all these issues, and
may God protect you from that