Haleh Banani – How to Stop Self-Sabotage and Finally Achieve Your Goals!

			Salam aleikum? Have you noticed that whenever you're trying to make some kind of success, move
forward, feel some kind of happiness, you do something. And it's unintentional, but you stand in
your own way, something happens in the way in your behavior, somehow you get uncomfortable, whether
it's with a certain success, whether it's you are achieving good grades, whether it's success at
work, whether it's a relationship you finally have, you're in a good place with your spouse, you're
getting along, maybe it's after a weekend, maybe it's after a trip, and then you get into a fight.
And what happens when you are, let's say, motivated to make that commitment to eating healthy and
		

			making good choices, and then suddenly, you you just stop and you cave in and you do all the things
that you weren't supposed to do. What that is all about is that you are self sabotaging yourself.
And a lot of times, we're not even aware of it because it is in our subconscious mind. self sabotage
is basically when consciously you want something, for instance, the good grades, you want the you
want to make more money, you want to let's say be more religious, you want to lose the weight, you
want that consciously. But subconsciously, there's something there that prevents you, it prevents
you from taking action, it either scares you, or there is something there that prevents you from
		

			moving forward. And a lot of times, the self sabotage is so subtle, that you're not even aware of
it. And it's so important to understand this because, you know, many people have been able to break
through this, it's what is like a glass ceiling, right? We put these kind of glass ceilings for
ourselves where we stay, and we cannot move forward. Unless we understand this, you know, I just did
the light session in the mindful hearts about stopping the self sabotage and, and it was an eye
opening experience. A lot of people said that they hadn't even they had not been exposed to the
information and, and how it's really making them understand why so many times when they are having a
		

			good relationship, they get into a fight afterwards, or when they are making progress at their work,
they suddenly do that the self sabotage is very eye opening. And we have to recognize that this can
be overcome it's a matter of awareness is recognizing that many times we are preventing ourselves
from moving forward out of fear, sometimes this this fear of oh my gosh, what if what if like some
of the sisters were sharing that if I am successful, then I'm going to be envied. Or if I'm too
happy, I don't feel happy, or I don't feel comfortable with happiness or success. And that is all
rooted in the way that we have been programmed. And a lot of times this is happening in our
		

			childhood, where we were not even aware of this programming. And until you go in, you understand and
then you reprogram yourself and you change that about yourself or your expectation, then you're not
going to be able to break free. And it is all about understanding, understanding that we have the
ability to reprogram, right? So in that process of getting, what is it what is our limit, right. And
when you reach that, you may feel like you're not worthy. A lot of people out there feel like
they're not worthy to have a good relationship, they're not worthy to succeed or achieve that goal
or get that degree and this prevents them from moving ahead, you know, on a daily basis. I work with
		

			people and I help them break through that glass ceiling, whether it's individually, helping them to
overcome their self image, the body image that they have, you know, had just one sister, Mashallah
tell us that, you know, she hadn't been exercising for years. But because of these lessons, she was
able to break free from her limiting beliefs herself sabotage. And not only is she taking Pilates
classes right now, she is becoming an instructor. It's not awesome. When you recognize that this is
holding me back. And now I'm going to actively do something about it. Now that I have the awareness,
right, because it's really about shining, like laser light on the problem. And once you recognize
		

			that, then you can catch yourself, you know, another sister was saying, Oh my god, I think this is
the reason I am not able to be happy in my relationship. One said that in her first marriage, what
happened was that anytime she was happy, she would self sabotage, she would get into a fight
subconsciously, right. None of us are thinking or planning plotting it out. But it just happens to
us naturally because we don't feel like we're worthy of that happiness. We're not worthy of
achieving that success. So it's so critical to recognize this. I see this in when I'm working with
couples and they have
		

			Have a beautiful, let's say vacation, and then they come back and they immediately get into a fight,
or they go out on a date night, and everything went smoothly, but then they come and they fight over
something so trivial, that they don't even know what the topic was about. I've had this experience
where I said, Hey, you, you brought up divorce, you were so mean and rude to each other? What was it
about and they're like, I don't even know. So that indicates to me that people are happy at a
certain level. This is their, their their, whether it's comfort zone is their upper limits. And you
what you have to recognize is that as soon as you go above that, you will do things, subconsciously,
		

			you will do it in order to get yourself back in your comfort zone. So what we got to do, we got to
recognize how to break away from that. And I show a step by step method in overcoming and overcoming
this self sabotage. Because once you learn this, you can reach those goals. And it's like, so
exciting. When I see people who thought when I had one client who always thought that they were she
was dumb, because that's what her mom had told her. So she thought that she is not able to achieve
her goals. And she never did well in school, she always was basically she classified herself as a
failure. But learning about all of this learning about the fact that she's self sabotaging herself
		

			and changing her limiting beliefs, she is Mashallah she went ahead. And she got not only her
bachelor's, but she pursued her master's. And this is, this is what the exciting things, the
exciting thing about being able to break free from the limiting beliefs and knowing how to stop the
self sabotage will help you to finally achieve that success, whatever in whatever area, right it
could be, religiously, maybe you have certain ideals. But you're not able to achieve that because
you're only comfortable with this level, right? Or maybe it's in your relationships with your with
your spouse, with your kids. Maybe it has to do with your relationship with your mother in law with
		

			your sister in law, right? You have a certain expectation. And no matter what you do consciously,
right, you could you could use willpower. You could say, you know, you could do a mantra, but it's
not going to help you until you recognize that this is the this is the limiting belief and you're
sabotaging yourself. So I hope that you can join me in the mindful hearts.com where every week I do
live sessions, and we make some major breakthroughs. Alhamdulillah we're seeing the sisters
transform their whole mentality. The family is noticing, they're noticing they're happier, they're
more optimistic. And the group the sisterhood is phenomenal. It is a place where you can be yourself
		

			there's no being fake or putting on a show. It's just about raw emotions being vulnerable, and it's
a closed group. So you have all the information is it's private, and the sisters are so incredibly
supportive there everyone holds hands and we're going through this journey together. So I hope that
you join me on the mindful hearts.com where you can learn amazing topics like how to stop self
sabotage how to stop limiting beliefs, how to have body appreciation, how to build your self esteem
all of it and it's not too late. Now what's unique about this course is that you can join in at any
time and it is you can join the live sessions right and this is on a weekly basis every Thursday at
		

			1pm Central. I do live sessions so you can join in the live session half the discussion feel the
sister their sisters are so excited they're like oh my gosh, I missed each other there's that
beautiful positive vibe where you don't get everywhere. So and there's this lovely lovely community
Mashallah and then all the sessions I've done so far it is recorded so you're not you haven't missed
out you're not going to be behind you can actually watch it at your own pace. But then you can join
in the live session and then there's the private the private facebook page and that's where you can
just you know share and there's even a messenger like everyone there chatting they're getting
		

			support sisters are praying for each other and it's just amazing so I hope you join us and on the
mindful hearts calm Oh sister said my you're saying you tried to join Okay folks, pending we're
gonna get that checked out sister sama I'm glad and we have sister son out here I like was Salam and
firewall and this is an all woman's group. Okay, so we have a sisters only and inshallah It is
amazing. It's a phenomenal experience. I hope you join me. Take care of Salaam Alaikum