Jumuah lecture delivered on Dec 2nd, 2016.
Alaa Elsayed – Raising Children
AI: Summary ©
The importance of growth and growth in the culture of the United States is discussed, along with the challenges of dealing with children and the importance of learning from experiences. The speakers emphasize the need for a father figure and protecting oneself in relationships. The importance of investing in one's children and not giving up on past experiences is emphasized, as well as the importance of not giving up on future plans and future expectations. The segment ends with a brief advertisement for a retirement plan and a message about a man named Joseph.
AI: Transcript ©
In 109, I want to start even want to start with when are we lacking is rhodium fujinami say that Dr. Medina, Maria de la Vela, Melissa woman, you bleep Ella. Why should we learn?
What the hula sharika Why should one Mohammedan Abu Sulu, Nationale de oro Sula, la data Amana have a lot of reseller on Osaka Oman. Akasha Allah will become a woman at the villa haka he had Kalia clean, which is aka loveline. nebia nanometric. What are Sula nerissa? Latin America? Yeah you are Latina mundo de la vida de la tomato nyla on the moon. Yeah you Hannah sutopo Bakula the NFC Makita bahala. Pamina Soulja Baba meet Omari Jalan region 01 is
what de la la luna v one or ham in LA Cana la Cooperativa. Yeah, you have Latina hora de la la la la Colin Salida you select local Moroccan oil see la comme de Nova calm
our sole
focus on Alabama and back in our 70s cutable law. Well hey God Mohammed in Salalah while he was alone, or shadow Maureen wanted her to have Hakuna Matata timbira wakulla with Adam, Allah Allah, Allah Allah ma back My dear brothers and sisters in Islam and we're gonna break this series of massage modalities set again for a special event hamdulillah we're continuing inshallah after the past seekers series, but today we're going to talk about something very special.
Our children
for a reason, inshallah.
They are the fruit of the hearts.
They are the hope of the future, the flower of tomorrow and the pleasure of today. They aren't answered.
There are mentioned Robinson that fluffer in plenty.
We need to have them in as well. You know what?
I mean? Well, I grant this from our spouses and our children Yeah, pull up the I make a leaders with the pious and righteous and conscious of a loss.
It's a long list, and the path is there. For those who wanted
Allah Subhana Allah to Allah give us a way to attain it. And prophet muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, shoeless how practically
you understand that there are three prongs we are going to approach through a child law. Does Leah, Leah, tell me three things that we have to work on when it comes to children. So we always told that definitely accoglienza here, this is actually not what I bought, which means purification before beautification, but I'm going to add one, which is growth.
In this land, we have to understand how to deal with our children. It's a very difficult task well, like we've heard enough stories we've seen enough. And Jeff Atilla This happens all over justify for that how many cases we have either emails or voicemails in person, or in the office enough, over 20 or 25 years of doing this? We've heard enough, we've seen enough. And by the blessing of Allah Subhana, Allah finally we've done something that may Allah accept from us to address it. Hopefully, there is proactive approach, not reactive approach, or at least damage control. So this purification, before the beautification, then the growth is what we're going to talk about today.
Even when you say I should try to alert you know, it is a lot in that in itself is that well, meaning the what is compromisable? What is not compromisable? In the Shahada, you're actually saying the same thing. The purification, the notification says, I agree with this, that there is no deity
of worship except allows them I don't know, you actually say what, I'm innocent of anything. First, that is being worshiped on the face of the earth, prior meaning in history, or present or in the future. I'm innocent of that.
Small G. I'm innocent of anything
other than a loss of how now you love Yoda, so we're also going to talk about that, that's that positive and negative. First, we said if you have a stain on your shirt, you just can't put preview and work. You have to wash it first. And that's what we're gonna try to do. This washes first, then add the intro after jhala then grow with it to Java. So it says the three problems are simple. So it tells me out in the shower, what should watch
This purification of that the doodies the bubble deep, the doubts and desires. That's why we will see look man for him to lay, it will tell you who they are. And even the advice he's telling him and what is that advice after that I like to shake? No doubt, there is no there is no addition to that worship of Allah subhanaw taala do not ascribe partners to Allah or Buddha. So he's monotheism worshiping Allah Subhana agenda. There's no sure
what to do now in the end of Soraka. I mean, can I really Barbie fell Yamanaka? Well, I usually
put them together since you have to do the righteous deeds according to the plan. What Allah subhanaw taala told us to do. And according to the Sunnah, and there is no shame. No, there has to be a plus. In number am Albania in America liberty in Manoa, and
in the so Hey,
everyone will get what they intended, not just what you do what you intended with what you actions, most of us know the first part of the agenda. But we neglect the second part of
America.
If you're migrating, if you're doing anything for messenger, you will get that rewards. But if you're hitting it off, or doing the app, or Emma, for this worldly affairs, businesses, money, whatever it is, nothing is held up. But that's what you're gonna get, or a woman that you will wait, that's what you will get. So why is it then that we have all these issues? Why do we want to travel around the world we see the same thing, same issues, but just different faces and different names, same issues? Well, I'm letting you guys know, because we far away from the peninsula. That's the only answer I this was the one that comes with it. Because when the sister comes in to complain
about her children, or the brother comes in about the children, and we hear this or that he used to be memorizing the grand well, like, so we're not listen, we're not speaking from a high horse, we have some issues with our children to those things we don't we do.
So I used to hear this used to memorize the Quran, she was there to wear the hijab in that country, she used to win the pratica competition, using a porpoise will lie he that's why we're here. But what do we wait for three letters? And one word? What is it? But
But what have you,
when he left this country, when he left the high school, it's another one, when he left this company, when he left that environment, when he left this message when he left this, whatever, but this is what we went for.
So what do we have to do it?
The first thing that's gonna say in order for you to reach this level, because I will tell you the reward after inshallah, because in sales, they will tell you what, what the future is, I'm gonna have it's two things, the features and benefits, agility, futures, contract benefits self, I'll have to tell you the benefit. In the end. I'm trying to sell you the idea you have to invest in your children do you believe it? We have now we came to a level that I have to tell you how important it is for you to look after your children.
Because what do we get? Where's your father? Man?
Where's there overseas somewhere? Where's your mother?
Where's that somewhere out there? And that's why I need that he thought about the law. I'm on Elevate to the pub. He says that what is the definition of an orphan?
What's the definition of an orphan? An orphan we know that that the one that lost his father, this human beings lost his father before he reached puberty. That's the definition of orphan but he has a different definition. There are two definitions actually, according to some of the scholars and
he says they a team is not the one
that has no father and mother. No, no, he has a father. He has a mother.
But
that's not what I did. He has a father he has a mother, but he's still an orphan. Why? Because the harlot a mother that has what her children in her up up front. That's her goal. No, he has a career to to get to be successful a lady we're not telling you not to work. I want you to be the best doctor the best teacher the best everything well life
but not when you lose your children. What kind of career is that?
He saw he says he has a mother but the mother is not there.
You know I received
a sister that wants to get married but you know on her bio. She doesn't want to cook shoes when technicians want to raise children's. So I don't want to embarrass them.
Well, I I told my wife delete her file. How do I play a brother with a sister and she wants the brother
To raise the children. Isn't that amazing? We got too much Western Western eyes aligned our attitude. We live here Now listen, we're equal. Yes, you are equal in Nevada. No doubt. But Allah Subhana Allah give you three levels higher than us higher. You are raised three levels higher. Do you believe it? You are three levels higher than us. What honor can you get? You want more on I'll give you that inshallah.
Prophet Mohammed. So someone says, your mother, your mother, your mother than your father. Why? Because you're good looking?
No.
Because he said, the three things that Prophet Mohammed told you raised you three times higher than us is that the three rents one is you're actually having the child inside of you in the womb, nine months, we're not equipped we can never compete with you. Number two, the scholars say the labor pin you had to endure to give us birth in the favor of a delay. It says women are having DOMA. And they give birth to the other hybridoma to the other Homa, but they are leaving the oma and going through that. Whatever it is, they're going through what like what better honor for you to raise a child that can lead the oma it's better for you to raise a child and raise a high rise. Anybody can do
that. But not anybody can raise a leader. So kind of logic.
And the third one is the two years you stayed up by night to nurse your child. These are the three ranks you're raised above men in Islamic psychology, but we're taking the throw it away.
You want more honor? Okey listen to the
Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, I know I had a woman that raised her children righteously got it. He said
he put his index finger and the middle finger together. It says that woman
that her husband died, but she stayed to raise her children righteously. We are together in gender like this.
How much would you pay off you to be with Prophet Mohammed? Salah Jana like this, your children are your key suppiler love.
Another hug, he says
will open and I will see a woman that will come once then to agenda with me.
So I asked Who is this? Who is this up, since this is a woman that her husband died and refused to get married after that. And she wanted to make sure that I gave her life and devote her life to raise her children. So I take her hand and go together with the agenda.
Hello. So are you gonna let go that hand up your children and take their hand that boss that wants to pay you whatever it is. Now I understand if there's the whole understand if there's need and necessity understand what money but under normal circumstances, well, I went to a city not gonna mention his name. I was teaching this course about this stuff. And the sisters will lie and that he that Yeah, I was scared. I was I stopped teaching the horse. Because they gave me so much attitude. When I started talking about this as I was a career, and this city was known to be a career, you know, driven government. Whatever you understand, I'm talking about now.
Now the system will lunch if you can see the laser beam coming out of the eyes.
I mean, you know that you know the attitude. Well, like I said, Well, I stopped the course I said, well life we're getting this course this is not important to me right now. But you know what's important to me is your Akita
you believe your deen you hear after? Why? Because I just told you, Allah Subhana Allah said it's in the Quran, and you refused it that scares me.
I just told you all the Prophet Mohammed Salah was I said that in the Sunnah. you reject? I won't forget the force, let's work on your aqidah first.
Because the level somehow no data sets will not
follow what a pseudo
it is not befitting for to believe in the woman. He didn't say I'm Muslim is a true believer, women and men, men and women both have a lovely piece of matter. And probably Mohammed saw some decrees that matter that you would have a choice of their own.
Yeah, you have.
Too many too many of them. So what happens? Yes.
You want some more? We'll get you some more the brothers. Yeah. See, I know sometimes we can't find a job here. So you have to go back home or overseas in the Gulf region where the money is there. I understand what like I understand. But there are exceptions. Don't get me wrong. I've seen some brothers that their father's overseas under martial law and they're doing fantastic. That's an exception. But the norm what's the norm? the norm is you need a father figure in their life. They need somebody to be there.
We delegate the responsibility of the mother and the father to the mother. And that's it. My job is what $1 sign dad. That's what we talked about before. So the children's ears, the dollar sign, you're not there for them when they're young, they're not going to be there for you when you're old. Rest assured, it's said that you have to repay because they see you as $1 sign who's my dad, he doesn't know me. He doesn't know like, my favorite person doesn't know anything I want to do. All he thinks that he has to do is put the food on the table roof over their head and clothes on their back. That's my job as a father. Well, if you got it wrong, you got it all wrong, my brothers.
You have to be there for them. Because the time is running, but we'll take you on the roadmap and y'all love me I love it. Make us with a W nine mama and save our children. I mean, the whole mothers no one wants that.
salatu salam, ala Latvia.
Forgive me, my brothers and sister. Sometimes we get emotional lucky because of what we see. And what we hear. And we live your pain. You know, don't you think it affects his whole life? It affects us. When I see a brother or sister come and cry in the office. What do you think we feel? How do you think we will human beings sometimes will lie? I go quiet.
And I tell them I can't believe this brother did this. I can't believe the sister did this is the brother. I can't believe the demand. did this. I can't believe the child did this look. Like when she got hit? so long? I thought I think I'm gonna protect the smell of or give us and forgive them guidance and guide them. But we see it all the time. And what do we do? What do we do? It's amazing. we absorb it and we live it and it's there all the time. Why it's not easy to take, I assure you it's not easy to take to see your brothers and sisters, the one that you love. The homeless is falling apart and you see the media around you dissecting. And you see the places where we left
home. I remember when I left a long time ago, and you walk in the street. It is it is amazing. If you see even an undergarment Forgive me for the expression. undergarment even displayed on the outside. It's Wow. We will go talk to the owner of this thing what you're showing them underground and then display on the street. Now you go ahead and walk into a Muslim country so called Muslim countries, what happened? Is that not among the signs of times
that you see things that even will lie My wife was telling me I was I was I was watching some series on some so Muslim countries, and I thought they were worse than the western TV stations. They're now talking about certain things we didn't even fathom and about. So what do we do? How do we save our children and it's a small village. Now this whole world of small village doesn't matter where you are
in your bedroom. Shaytan is everywhere. But God has got into your cell phones and your computers you cannot run away from what you have to do to protect yourself first. That's why I
didn't say the tablet. stylus wasn't
used to say it doesn't come to me he was doing piano like
it was a family and all of a sudden you remember this son? What did you do? Is I prolong my career.
I was doing piano late and it's just I remember the loss of
the piano lower symptom. Well, you're still living.
You understand we have to start my brothers and sisters and that's why Prophet Mohammed told us
everyone is a shepherd you will be held accountable. And that's why you will see that scholars will tell you what is the shepherd the shepherd lead the flock and tell us you to go ahead and follow me know that the separate actually goes behind the flock and make sure they go in the straight path. You have the vision you don't see anything when your front laoshi a shepherd one of us make sure that we have the flock is upon our sight. Our children should be right there up front. The investment is the most important as you will see a ninja the whole book why we should be doing this.
And we have to have this anona kulu kumaran everyone is a shepherd and responsible for the flock the leads.
And why? Because Allah subhanaw taala told us this amount is in the amount of this amount as the whole thing the whole be this amount of trustworthiness, that the whole law
in America.
He's telling you, your children and your wealth is a fitna is a test. I'm not saying it's bad. A fitna is a test it could be good or bad.
It depends on how you use it.
So the same facade and I've been shut up about
you know what that means? If your children are spoiled, you didn't raise them righteously who's going to pay the price do you think?
Well, yes, they will pay the price of course but who ultimately you
If you haven't invested in your children, you think the rest of you the whole your whole life, you think you're gonna have a nice, easy life, it's gonna mess with your head, subconsciously, you will not be able to sleep. I did this to my child, I did that to my daughter, my daughter or my son, I did not give them the tools to be able to write a shower. These doubts and desires that
I didn't give enough tools I was responsible, but this one human being, but I failed miserably. Well, I am not saying that for you to despair to wake up. That's all to make sure it's not too late to come back. And the answers are there, we're here for you. We're here to help your child love.
But you have to do your part.
You have to understand that we cannot just get children here. And some of us have more and more children, but the quantity that we after quantity, we're after quality to
just keep bringing children the word that we cannot give them the proper tools and everything else they need to get done. We're not there for them. It's not that it's a different environment here. We understand that an environment that was a fiasco last
night,
and how they used to bond together.
Java Yup. You understand when he actually went he was he was not a very rich man. But when the people there, the father and mother died, he was the he was the orphans lead. He looked after the orphans. And that's why when he died, he said the Sahaba fought over the children for he looked after these are they were fighting over who's gonna look after the children.
Whatever was hobbled
at a time. That's how I used to work. And that's why he's here.
You know, when you have children, you're free. Now, how do I pay? I have to be silent. Don't say anything. You have to get the job. You have to pay the bills. Don't worry about anything. Unless you're scared. No, it's allowed. It's a big man. Your children are fitna and your wealth is a fitna, you're testing how you're going to use them.
Among the Xena.
This blue element of life is that same thing again. You will you'll find it. So what do we have to do? Yes, yeah.
Well, let's go now, let's take it the road map. And the
first thing that scholars tell you we talk about this all the time, please, before you get married, before you get married. How do you criteria strategic priorities? You know, I talked to the youth all the time, why don't I get married? My mother told me to do it.
Why don't we get back she's 3624 36. So my heart is aching. My knees are shaking, strained thinking she doesn't even think and I've said that before well, and she has got it all wrong all along.
But if you think about how to do it, and why you want to do it, you have to go back in history. You have to think of what to do now you'll be look at the intentions look at the intentions. Why do you want to get married? And he talks about the long list of things. Yes, that's the best money and spend in your life is the money you spent for your family. Even intimate relations are rewarded. Well there have to be we have to blend in sooner.
Proceed with self discipline your children coming to you and gender.
Alina?
Yes, your children will follow you. In Jenna, you raise them righteously.
Yep, lower your gaze lower against protect yourself. Protect yourself. There's so many things that you can do complete hazard your deen so many inventions you can do when you get married. So we have to purify our intention. First, why do you want to get married?
So it's not that what we think? No, it's not how we brought up, come back.
Listen to
the Father. Desmond Dean.
What do you want to do? Do you say I want a wife to raise a child that Allah subhanaw taala would give him so we can get this back.
That was his intention. But this woman that he wants to get married, it was not having the same intention didn't marry her. But another woman heard him say that. He says he's asking her my intention to get married to you is this. She wasn't on board. He didn't get married. But another woman in the same place. She heard him. I heard you say I want to get married. So I can raise a child to read Allah subhanaw taala will give him victory to get our messages. Back Bay to lock this back is I want to get married so I can raise a child. So it allows him I don't I don't give them back. So we can get this back. They married each other.
And that's
a UV that's
a UV. That's the fruit of that intention. Allows right gave him that Why? Because they were sincere. So can I ask you a question brothers and sisters? What's your intention of having children? Yes, it's my retirement plan.
I have a child who can be a doctor because that's all
Almost as you want a child a doctor or an engineer, that's it. You're going to be a doctor. Engineer. Number one, number two, number three doctor again, I'm gonna call engineer doctor. Engineer. So I would invest in them. Yes, when I was dying, I'm chilling, dude. Yeah, Habibi is much more than that. Much more than that. A chef here is actually explaining the idea. He says the investment he told him here Yes, here fine, no problem, but then you answer my brothers. Yeah.
That's the investment you after to protect yourself and your children from now via Moodle together and gentlemen, enjoy yourself to the fullest and isn't done yet. Have fun enjoy to the halls of Congress had no problems but our intention is different. Our intention is different my brothers and sisters and so on and so forth. Lastly, inshallah.
Hopefully it will get in touch inshallah. I will tell you the reason why we're talking about it today.
Listen, in that. Ronnie
Rahmatullah is narrated.
Prophet Mohammed Salah. Lavanya so look
at another Hadith
Allah subhanho wa Taala on judgment day.
You will see in your Sahiba your books so many good deeds
you said I'll be another
where does this come from? All these good deeds? What Why am I Why am I so having too much good deeds?
You know what that he says? Haha hada is still far one
isn't amazing. Your child is making too hard for you or for you? And nobody happy? He said allows him how to deliver raise your rent so high in heaven and you asked him the same question your law How can I be raised up high heaven is this again your child was making driveway and stuff
that's why
he said that. He said this is what you want to invest in. That's why the Sahaba johannah train you to understand that's why you see I believe Norma I believe
you see if
you invested in in the children you knew that that's the path to come close to Allah you because they wanted to assure the future of the oma but I was our intention now. He has to wear gosh oh my gosh and pick you up and touch Darshan and you have to drink you think you will or whatever Yeah, I mean, it's not that yes, you want to have a car that's got a house and has to you have to weigh the colors and the deed you have to be in with the group and you have to be chill, relax. It just the dunya is just a bridge, have the Cathars we're not saying raggedy let them be the best of everything but don't forget that in and that's why probably Mohammed told us that after on top of that is raise
your children up to three things three things
unless officer elevates the family of
one. He says
Deanna, raise your children to be like this. Yeah, he had already given the two prongs given the tools to be the best in the dunya but to protect themselves. That's the two prongs and that's the reason we're telling you there are three things that we're talking about here today is all right here. We're starting the job love I've listened to a lot
we've been working on this for the last few years by the way. I mean I love this the he doesn't want to
write us back and pick the focus
to bring it back starting in mid January January 14
there are three things that we're doing here at least on the weekend inshallah the grad
program there are three programs Islamic under the Islamic boundaries of the weekend something we can
budget for, they don't have you know, law.
And the Islamic Studies led by Dr. Oliver was he had with a lot of the Islamic Institute of research and the Arabic program which is led by radio brother without without law of relativity. So we have three programs for you. Or an Islamic Studies and Arabic. It's all in a piece of paper waiting for you outside. So I'm asking you for the sake of Allah. Don't let yourself down and don't let your children down. And don't betray the Amana take a flyer registered children and we'll see you in July in the middle of January. Where we can celebrate the success in this dunya in a we're after so we can be together in gender with our children. I mean, laugh at our candlelight. Oh Blimey, no samanya
Joseph theater opened up in Hamburg on budget It was about he was planning on selecting a homogeneity no matter how many Alonso has done Iceland was that you know I didn't have to give him I don't have to attend my dealership carmustine nada de nada caffeine. Caffeine, aka Valentina Valentina, have recently been named said to me, My phone number is me calling me and my phone number is slightly cloudy my phone number to send it off and in what additionally been another or has it been a long time in mania. You
No phocoena on a Monday night Romanian Okinawa, Tatiana robina have done them as well you know what the reading up on it and watch
it later but I mean it will suck you into me