Ahmed Hamed – Tips to Manage Relationships

Ahmed Hamed
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AI: Summary ©

The learning group on Islam emphasizes the importance of balancing love, attention, and caring for others in order to build strong relationships and avoid negative consequences. Investing time in one's life to make it worthwhile and worthy, and prioritizing patient's love, respect, and caring for others is emphasized. The importance of forgiveness and small small moments of regret is emphasized, along with the need to avoid mistakes, maintain healthy relationships, and find a person of equal caliber and value themselves in order to achieve their goals.

AI: Summary ©

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			Karani Rahim al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala Abdullah II Rasul he now be in
mo Hamad ala alihi wa sahbihi. Juma in.
		
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			As usual we praise and thank Allah the Almighty Send blessings and solicitations on the Messenger of
Allah Mohammed sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, his family, his companions, and all of us who believe
till the Day of Judgment. This is your brother Muhammad Akbar, and I shall be a host once again
today. And I would like to greet you with the most honorable of the greetings the greeting of Islam
As salam o Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuhu.
		
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			This is an initiative of almoner Islamic Center. almoner Islamic Center is run under the patronage
of a Highness Sheikh Mohammed bin Mohammed Jamal matteau, wife of His Highness Sheikh Mohammed bin
Rashid Al Maktoum, Vice President, Prime Minister and the Ruler of Dubai.
		
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			We thank Allah the Almighty for choosing us to be a part of this wonderful learning group.
		
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			And I would now like to take the honor and the privilege to introduce to you today's speaker. Once
again, my dear brothers and sisters, we have been blessed to have among us chef Hamad Hamad. Now let
me give you a brief introduction on Sheikh Mohammed, Shanghai, Mohammed is a motivational speaker on
Islam and comparative religion. He's also a corporate trader, life coach with spiritual touch. He
presents Islam in a dynamic way and clarifies misconceptions about Islam on the basis of Quran
authentic teachings of Prophet Muhammad peace and blessings be upon him and other world religious
scriptures with reason, logic and scientific understanding.
		
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			He is a former board member of Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum award for world peace. established by
the decree of His Highness Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum, Vice President and Prime Minister
of the UAE and Ruler of Dubai, an initiative to accurately and fairly highlight Islamic teaching of
peace as a doctrine that promotes harmony, tolerance and moderation. He has gained prominence
through his strategic approach in organizing large events, and has been a regular contributor to
peace initiatives by putting together international conferences, lectures and programs. His main
exercise are the following. For example, public talks, Dawa training, personality development
		
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			workshops, life coaching, organizing large conventions, Islamic courses and workshops, counseling
programs, social guidance, life skills, training and mentoring. So please stay focused, as we
present to you, Chef Mohamad on the topic, tips to manage relationships. So, my dear brothers and
sisters, this is such an important topic that when we connect ourselves to one another, it becomes
very important for us to have a relationship alive with them in the Islamic perspective. So now I
would like to invite Czech Mohamad, to please come forward and take over the session and share more
knowledge with us so that he shares his tips of his tips on managing relations relationships.
		
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			Assalamu alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh Malik my honorable,
		
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			very methodical share. Yes, we can hear you very clearly. Luffy Zach Lowe.
		
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			Salafi once again, Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah al Karim while
he was happy Jemaine I was a Billahi min ash shaytani r rajim Bismillah Ar Rahman AR Rahim wibu De
La Hoya to Shrek be Shea while bill Valley Dini Sana Wabi Sabi Cordoba. Probably surely surgery.
Were certainly Omri while opendata melissani Yes, tahu Kohli, my beloved brothers and sisters,
welcome again to another live vetinari on the topic, tips to manage relationships. Well, hamdulillah
we praise and we thank Allah subhanho wa Taala. And we ask a lot of Blizzard to help us fix our
relationships stronger and deeper for his sake. I mean, you're up but I mean, my beloved brothers
		
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			and sisters at the outset, always it is important to learn with reason. Learn with reason, why do we
need to manage relationships Subhan Allah, if we actually ponder over this point, where we have to
really really think over again and again, that how important it is
		
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			To manage your relationships insha Allah when we realize that we would at least think twice, to to,
you know, civil, our relationships with anyone, Allahu Akbar, my beloved brothers and sisters, we're
living in time where we are actually, to be honest, in honestly speaking into relationship crisis,
yes, indeed, we are into relationship, crisis and Subhanallah it becomes more important when we see
that there is a problem which is increasing every single day, where we see the relationships are not
being valued the way it is supposed to be. So my beloved brothers and sisters, it is highly
important for us to understand the management of relationships, you know, Subhanallah perhaps we are
		
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			quite good. When it comes to building relationships, we build relationships, perhaps very quickly,
some of us but then it is quite challenging. And it becomes more, you know, difficult many times to
manage the relationships and somehow Allah, a lot of Budweiser, he has created us and in our lives,
we actually see two types of relationships that we need to build and manage Subhan Allah, the first
relationship that Allah Subhana huhtala has gifted us with our own family members. Subhan Allah,
this is absolutely Allah says plan that he has chosen us for mother for us mother, father, brother,
sister, you know,
		
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			these relationships, or these kind of relationships, which we say blood relationships, you know,
relatives, they are given by Allah subhanho wa Taala. So, in reality, this is a plan of Allah
subhanaw taala and it comes as a blessing from Allah subhanho wa Taala each relation ship that we
actually see, that second type of relationship is that which a lot of Syriza has obviously planned
it, but he gave the freedom for us to actually choose, for example, neighbors, for example, he has
given us the liberty to choose friends, spouses, these relationships that we actually try to choose
and build for ourselves. And Subhanallah Islam is a complete balanced way of life, which actually
		
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			gave us the guideline that we can actually build and manage relationships, absolutely better and
powerful. 100 Allah, Allah subhanho wa Taala he says in the Quran, what about Allah? Allah to Shri
cuwbc?
		
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			What will worldly they need if Sunnah? What is ill corba so Allah Buddha, he says in Surah, Nisa,
surah number four is number 36. A lot of binaries I says, Do not, do not associate anyone with ALLAH
subhanaw taala when it comes as a command, why would Allah worship Allah subhanho wa Taala and do
not associate partners with him and to your parents do the excellent, you know, performance in terms
of all things, do good with them with Exxon and with the relatives, so relations are also taken into
consideration. upholding ties is actually a duty of every one of us and this is the duty which is
given by none other than Allah subhanho wa Taala where Allah subhanho wa Taala he says what
		
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			and be conscious, be conscious of Allah through whom you demand mutual rights with each other.
		
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			And do not cut off relations of rooms of relatives of your your your belonging once do not cut off
relationship. So it comes as a duty upon every one of us in the command from Allah subhanaw taala to
keep the relationships upholding ties Subhan Allah and a lot of good things he has warned us in
Surah Arad surah, number 39, number 25, where Allah subhanho wa Taala he says and those who break
the covenant of Allah subhanho wa Taala
		
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			After its ratification, and several, that which Allah has commanded to be joined, that is they sever
the bond of relations, Subhash Subhana Allah and work mischeif on the land, and on them a lot of
resources and on them is the curse. And not just that in this world this is the curse which means
they are away from the mercy of Allah subhanho wa Taala. Those who cut off relationships and for the
hereafter in the hereafter for them is an unhappy home, which means the Hellfire, Allahu Akbar, my
beloved brothers and sisters, they cannot be any more important that can be triggered than to
understand that Allah subhanho wa Taala he gave us the command, he gave us the instruction to keep
		
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			your ties intact, to make sure that you do not cut off your relationships, because this will bring
the Wrath of Allah subhana wa tada in this world, meaning you will be away from the mercy of Allah
subhanho wa Taala. And in the Hereafter, there'll be a worst punishment for those kinds of people.
Subhan Allah, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he gave us the definition of upholding ties.
You know, it's not about you are good to those who are good to you. It's not about you visit to
those who visit you. It's not about you gift to those who give to you. It's not about you greet one
who greets back to you. It's about you give it regardless whether people give it to you or not. That
		
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			is appalling ties. And that is what the prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he says the one who
maintains a relationship with the relatives only because they maintain it with them, then this is
actually not upholding ties. upholding ties means the one who uphold ties regardless of the other
person, do it or not Subhana Allah, this brings to our notice that ma Mashallah, in Islam, the point
that we have gained in as a part of our guidance in managing relationships is regardless whether
people they care for you or not, you care for them, they might do things which they wish or they
like to do, but you as a person, you as a believer in Allah subhanho wa Taala you need to work in
		
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			the way that Allah subhanaw taala has guided you. And this also brings our notice that the Hadith of
the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam reported by Abu Bakr Ah, or the Allah and he said that there
is no wrong action, there is no wrong action, which Allah subhanahu wa taala is swifter, is strong
in taking account to punish in the world in addition to the punishment of the year after.
		
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			And that is than cutting off ties, cutting off ties with the kin and the and the kids, the religious
spannend and being unjust or doing injustice. So Allah subhanaw taala through the prophet sallallahu
alayhi Salaam brought again a point of wanting for us, if we cut off our relationships with with
people, then it's actually we have to be prepared for a swift account. And this is a punishment in
this world, as well as in the here after Subhan Allah so my beloved brothers and sisters, it is
very, very important to understand also that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he said, Those
who believe in Allah and the Last Day, meaning those who believe in Allah, subhanaw, taala and
		
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			Yeoman are here.
		
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			They must maintain relations. So my beloved brothers and sisters, it becomes so important for us as
a reason to keep up ties and bonds with people and manage relationships, you know, in our lives, and
to Allah, Allah who when he gave, or whenever he gives an instruction to follow, he always helps us
with what with guidance. He shows us the way through the Quran and practically showing the
demonstration through the life of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. So, what are those
principles that we need to keep in mind in managing relationships? These principles are so
important, and they are like core very, very significant.
		
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			We, if we really want to manage relations, we have to follow these principles, there is, I repeat,
there is no way that you and I can manage relationships better and more healthier
		
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			than following these principles Subhan Allah there is no other way than these principles. So what
are these principles? Number one, the principle number one, love each other for the sake of Allah
subhanho wa Taala. You see, it is said that the love which is for the sake of Allah never dies. If
you and I love each other, for the sake of Allah, it demands what it demands purity, it demands
sincerity, it demands that which is so beautiful in relationships. So you you carry a special care
and compassion for that person, because you know, that you are loving each other for the sake of
Allah subhanho wa Taala. In order to do that, the principle demands that you need to fix your
		
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			relationship with Allah subhanho wa Taala First, if you're in my relationship with a lot of Bonanza
is not good, is weak, is shallow, it's something which is you know, very, very bleak, then
obviously, your and my relationship with anyone will not be powerful, it will never be stronger. It
will never be deep. It will never be sincere, Subhan Allah, so you and I have to fix our
relationship with Allah subhanho wa Taala first, and that means that we need to believe in him and
we need to sincerely submit and obey Him in His commands. Subhana Allah so when you fix relationship
with Allah Subhana Allah, Allah will work for you. Allah will make things easy for you, Allah will
		
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			guide you and He will put your love in the hearts of Your Beloved ones. So those who are sincere,
will definitely love you back. Many times we try to please people at the expense of displeasing
Allah subhanho wa Taala thinking that my relationship with temple with people we don't think that
this act or any act that tampers my relationship with my makeup with my Creator with my cherisher
with my sustainer with my rub, what what is going to be happened what's the consequence Subhan Allah
so I need to make sure that I will never please people at the expense of losing Allah subhanaw taala
I have to keep a lot of Blairism on my side always in order to do that I need to fix my relationship
		
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			have strong connection with Allah subhanaw taala Your and my relationship the more into stronger,
deeper, sincere, submissive with Allah subhanho wa Taala The more we will be able to manage
relationships with the people why? Why is it so because when we actually love each other for the
sake of Allah fixing our relationship with Allah subhanho wa Taala we work on the terms of Allah,
you're in my terms will not work that way. It will never, ever bring results. You know, it might
give you temporary, you know, point of, you know, satisfaction but then it will never be long term.
It will never be fruitful, it will never be productive. It will never be beautiful. Why? Because the
		
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			mercy has to come from Allah subhanho wa Taala the kind of beauty the strength in love has to come
from Allah subhanho wa Taala he is the owner of all that. So when you fix your relationship, you
work on Allah stones so you forgive people for the sake of Allah, you love people for the sake of
Allah, you don't really matter things you matter what Allah Allah is Allah says so, first principle
is love each other for the sake of Allah fixing your relationship at the first when Allah subhanho
wa Taala second principle is you need to follow the example of the Prophet salallahu alayhi salam,
you need to have a role model in life in managing relationships. How the Prophet sallallahu alayhi
		
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			wa sallam manage his relationships, right Subhan Allah we know that the Prophet sallallaahu Selim is
meant to be the best example as a lot of money resources locker, the Canada configure us to rely on
Hashanah. The best example for you and I to follow in our lives is the law is the life of Prophet
salallahu alaihe salam, look, how Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam maintained relationships with
all people and we'll talk about all those relations in Sharla in a while. Third, we need to work on
excellence. You know what is sun if the principle of
		
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			Son is missing in managing relations, we will never be able to manage we may build for temporary
time period, but then eventually will drop off will temper our relations. So, if the ingredient of
sun excellence does not come in our principal book of relationships, we will never be able to carry
our relationships better, stronger, healthier, and happier, we will never be able to So, what is
axon axon is you do extra work the person deserves you do extra what the person deserves a person
might not deserve the kind of or the level of treatment, but what did you do you did it extra that
is son. So a person might not do anything but you still do it what is that, that is a sign of son.
		
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			So have the quality of son.
		
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			You know excellence in your principles of life, to manage relationships, number four respect.
		
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			Today we see there is a lack of respect, even in the relationship which is the most important, you
know, after Allah and His Messenger, the most important relationship that we have in our lives is of
our parents. We see there is a lack and a gap of relationship of respect. In this relationship, a
lot of binaries aces will occur the Karana Bani Adam, Allahu Akbar, Allah says that Allah has
honored the children of Adam. So if Allah has honored the children of Adam, and among the children
of Adam, you as a parents whose a lot of reasons for being valid any signer, that's what Allah
subhanaw taala says. So you need to have extreme level of respect, right? So respect for everyone,
		
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			regardless, regardless who that person is, whether he is his, his, you know, Muslim, or a non
Muslim, a person who, who, who you know, whom you don't know, anyone, respect for the mankind is
guaranteed and decreed by Allah subhanaw taala. So, you and I cannot definitely, you know, leave
that aspect and Subhanallah respect is actually shown at the time of disagreement, you don't respect
each other will go on, you know, you and I can respect each other very nicely as long as we are good
in relations. But the moment you and I argue, this agree, coming to conflict, there is a dispute,
there is a difference of opinion, that's when actual respect is reflected, Allahu Akbar, that's when
		
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			your respect the quality of that you have respect the principle that you have respect, it reflects
very clearly at the time of turbulence at the time of that crisis. At the time of that difficult
situation that you and I are in that state, the actual respect is evaluated. Allahu Akbar. So my
beloved brothers and sisters, you and I have to make sure that we carry respect in our lives for
everyone insha Allah, in order to manage relations in sha Allah, the first the fifth principle is
always, always value a person over a problem. This principle, it works like anything, it works like
wonders, Subhan Allah, by the will of a lot of Vanessa, it works like wonders, when you value a
		
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			person. For example, when you value your mother, any problem that comes into that relationship, it's
trivial. It's nothing, when you value your friend, in terms of any problem that comes under those
problems becomes very smaller. When you value your husband, when you value your wife, the problem
that might happen in between both of you, it has very little significance why because you have
valued, where you have valued you have given high respect and importance to that relationship to
that person, that these problems these issues become you know, trivial and we cannot expect that
there will be no issues they'll definitely be issues they'll definitely be problems but then the
		
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			beauty lies in when you value a person over a problem. When you value a relationship over an issue.
Subhan Allah so my beloved brothers and sisters, Principle number one, love each other for the sake
of Allah subhanaw taala fixing your relationship first with Allah
		
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			Whoa, what's up, number two, always follow the model of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam. Number
three, work for excellence, son. Number four, respect, respect, everyone. Number five, always value
a person over a problem insha Allah when we do these things, when we work, and when we live our
lives based on these principles in sha Allah isn't Allahu taala, we can say, we can definitely by
the will of Allah by the mercy in the permission of Allah, we will definitely be able to manage
relationships in our lives. My beloved brothers and sisters, as I said, there are two types of
relations that we carry in our lives, right? One is which is given by Allah, and one is we choose,
		
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			Allah gave us the freedom to choose. Now let's take up these relations and evaluate each other,
evaluate and introspect each other, and understand that how am I in this relationship? What does I
mean by giving importance to the relationship? So what is the relationship that I need to actually
manage insha Allah, so my beloved brothers and sisters, what we need to realize and understand is,
we have to have a very clear understanding of what are those relations that we need to manage in our
lives, Subhan Allah, so number one, is mother in the entire world. The first relation that comes
into play, when you have to manage your relationships, is your mother, my mother, so make sure as
		
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			the Prophet salallahu alaihe salam told us in Hadith, that the most honorable one to do who deserves
the companionship is your mother, your mother, your mother, and then your father, so Mother, you and
I have to make sure that we carry our relationship better and stronger, and how do we, you know,
carry that relationship by making sure that there are certain tips that we need to keep in mind,
which we'll talk about insha Allah in a while, those tips which we have to ensure that all these
relations that I'm going to count on have to be managed in a way that is very beautiful, and
powerful at the same time in sha Allah. So mother, father, is a beautiful and powerful figure in our
		
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			lives, who, who make us proud of gaining that momentum from Han Allah. So how do we carry
relationship with our fathers as well and Subhanallah this relationship with father and mother, it
doesn't cut off. If If anybody's father has passed away, or mother has passed away, you can still
count on relationship and carry the relationship with your father or mother even if they passed
away. By making sure that you continuously do good and pray for them, their their job, their levels
will go higher and higher. And Subhanallah This is how you actually keep your relationships up with
your parents as well. inshallah, then comes your siblings, you know, a lot of binaries, I chose your
		
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			brothers and sisters to be the brothers and sisters of yours and mine. So we need to make sure that
we value those relationships of brothers and sisters in our lives. And, of course, we have the
relations, the relatives in our lives. Again, they are blessed by Allah subhanaw taala. And that's
what a lot of queries it says, Be good to your relatives, so many times in the Quran. And in fact to
her Allah, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he also said that if you and I would like to get
increase in our age, and in our risk in our sustainance, we must keep up our ties with our
relatives. So upholding ties, and regardless, as I said, regardless, the standard is regardless
		
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			whether they do it to you or not, you uphold ties with them, makes your in my life has more Baraka
more blessing, and also it increases the amount of sustenance in our lives as well insha Allah, and
then we have relationships with our children. Again, they are the blessing from Allah subhanho wa
Taala what kind of bond that we have with our relations with our children. Subhana Allah, what kind
of beauty that we actually blend ourselves with, when it comes to our children also makes a real big
factor for our happiness, inshallah, in our lives, also my beloved brothers and sisters, the
relationship that we also have in our lives is that we choose
		
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			And that is spouse, husbands and wives, many times we choose our spouse and Subhanallah, this bond
that comes into play a person who is unknown completely in one night, that person becomes a part and
parcel of your life, she or he becomes the life partner for each other and Subhanallah this
relationship is so much discussed in the Quran, and in the Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi
wa sallam, because in reality, this is the relationship that basically forms the beautiful family,
by an extension to our society, and entire oma as well. So the the beautiful, the more stronger,
healthier, and happier that relationship is, the more better the oma will be at large insha Allah,
		
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			so how do we actually make sure that we manage relationship with husband and wife also we'll talk
about it in sha Allah, student and teacher has again a relationship, you know, a neighbor as well,
so much discussed in the Quran, and in the sooner about the importance of neighbors that we have to
have relations, inshallah businessmen and customers, you know, this, again, has a relationship
again, this is also governed by the principles that we had just discussed in, in this session,
inshallah, employer and employees also have that relationship with each other, and they actually
have to be again, governed by the laws of Allah subhanho wa Taala, my beloved brothers and sisters,
		
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			what is the relationship demand?
		
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			How do we expect a relationship to manage and carry on for long time? How do we expect? What are
those demands of maintaining or managing relationships in our lives? Number one, time, yes. In all
these relationships that we counted on, we
		
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			assume that the relationship can be better and stronger, without investing our time, that's not
possible for you and I to make sure that we manage our relationships better
		
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			and powerful, we need to
		
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			fulfill the demand. And that is time, the first demand is time. So panela, this relationship, to
grow in a better way to develop in a way that becomes beautiful, we need to invest time, and it
doesn't mean that you invest 24 by seven, with your loved ones, it doesn't mean that it means that
the amount of time that you actually spend, that becomes so valuable, so beautiful, so worthy, that
you invest that 10 minutes with your switch, you know, sitting at the at the, at the legs of your
mother, for example, and massaging your mother, for example, a few minutes to three minutes of that
time that you spend in kissing the head, you know, forehead of your mother, for example, making sure
		
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			that you give water without even she or he asks you, your parents, right. So investing certain time,
make it worthwhile, make it worthy, you know, Subhana, Allah de the amount of time that you and I
can spend, of course, it becomes very challenging to give a lot of time to our relationships. But
the problem is we do not value the amount of time that we take with our loved ones, we need to make
it absolutely high value out of it, make it worthwhile, make it valuable, make it really
extraordinary Subhan Allah, and how do we do that by making sure that we focus on that time, by
making sure that we give that quality time to that relationship that we have, and Subhanallah by
		
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			doing so, we actually gain that momentum of happiness. And in Panama, this is something which is
which is so important in our lives, giving time to each other is one of the key demands of managing
relationships. Number two is attention. Yes, you and I have to be attentive in managing relations.
You know, for example, when a husband leaves the house, how does the husband should be with the wife
and how should be the wife with the husband? Those moments of departure in the morning and those
moments of welcoming in the evening, between husband and wife those moments? How do you depart it's
very important. Pay attention to it.
		
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			The way you depart, that will set the tone for the day, the way you welcome that will set the tone
of the night. So make sure you're attentive, you give warm departure to your husband by making duar
greeting. And you can be as good, as beautiful as you can, when you depart and make sure that you're
welcome in a beautiful way your husband has gone out, you're working with trusts with so many
challenges out there, which you're not aware of, but the moment she comes in, you need to make sure
that you give that warm welcome those moments requires attention and the husband, when he comes, he
has to forego all those challenges, those stresses those pressure outside the home the moment he
		
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			comes, he should make the entire home field that you are in, it should not be an attentive, you
know, entry, it should be a very strong powerful, influential entry. So those moments that you
actually have require attention and how you actually are attentive towards each other. And this is,
you know, applicable for all the relations that we have, time does not allow us to go in each
relationship as a case study, you know, although we can do that, and Subhanallah This is so
important. So I'm just sharing the tips and bits of the the overall demands that we can make in our
lives and fulfill in our lives, and we can gain amazing fruits out of it inshallah. So time,
		
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			attention number three, affection, you know, love, we say affection, we say, is the key driver in
any relationship, it drives and manage your relationship. You know, a lot, many times we don't say,
you know, Subhan Allah and I asked this as a question to myself and to all of you when was the last
time that you said, I love you, my mother, I love you, my father, husband, when was the time that
you said to your wife and the wife said to your husband, when was it, when was the last time that
you stole your own children, I love you. So, the amount of love is, is felt with words, good words,
with feelings, that emotions that you blend yourself with and in the physical action. So, your
		
00:37:26 --> 00:38:15
			words, your your, your feelings, your emotions, all of these will will make, you know love reflected
many of the people they think and they want to live in this notion that you know what my love is in
the heart, well, who has gone inside your heart to see what it what what lies there, you need to
reflect it you need to present it and you need to show it, show it in not in the sense of showing
off, but show it means you need to reflect it make it manifested, you know seen and felt by the
people around you. So that is very, very important demand that you and I have to fulfill. Number
four is sacrifice as we see no price without sacrifice. So managing relationship requires sacrifice,
		
00:38:15 --> 00:39:09
			you know Subhana Allah Allah, Allah says, In Surah Al Imran surah number three, number 90 to learn
to know burrata tofu mimar to hogben, you will never attain a bill. Pie to goodness righteousness,
until you love you sacrifice that which you love the most. So, you need to have the ability to pay
sacrifice. If there is no sacrifice in life, you can never manage relationships, why sacrifice is
important, because life is not a straight line, it has ups and downs, it has good and bad it is it
has good times and bad times it has positive times a negative times. So in all those things, you
need to pay sacrifice, you need to go an extra mile you need to make sure that you give up sometimes
		
00:39:10 --> 00:39:58
			things which you might love the most. So, you need to pay sacrifice in order to fulfill the demand
in relationships insha Allah, the final thing is commitment. You know, you need to be committed in
relationship, if that relationship demands commitment, because you have formed the relationship, you
know, a stranger, a stranger is someone you can you know, smile at and greet at the max and you
know, you are not going to live him with him. But the moment you have your circle of relationship,
you need to be committed. Meaning you need to pay, you need to show love. You need to be attentive,
you need to have the sense of belongingness with them and you need to spend time with them. You need
		
00:39:58 --> 00:40:00
			to pay sacrifice at times. You need to
		
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			Make dua for them for the betterment. So you need to do so many things, what does it call in one
word, commitment, you need to have the sense of commitment in order to fulfill the demand in order
to me manage relationships insha Allah in your life, so my beloved brothers and sisters, these are
the five demands that we have in our lives that we need to keep in mind, to make sure that we manage
our relationships better. Now, what are those things that we need to keep in mind while managing
relationships? And what are those things that which we need to avoid? So, number one, what are the
things that we need to keep in mind that we have to have in order to manage relations, number one,
		
00:40:45 --> 00:41:39
			number one, we need to have understanding with each other, if there is no understanding or if there
is no understanding or if there is a misunderstanding, that relation can never carry for long time.
Mark these words, understand that without a key, proper understanding with each other, you can never
manage relationships better. In fact, you can't manage operations, why because you don't have an
understanding or you have a misunderstanding or you have lack of understanding SubhanAllah. So, you
need to make sure that you understand the person better and Islam gives us a principle to have a
good thoughts with each other. So, anything could happen between two people, when there are two
		
00:41:39 --> 00:42:23
			people, there are two minds, when there are two minds, there are two things two things means
difference of opinion anything is possible. So, the Prop, the point is, you and I have to have a
good understanding with each other, and how does a good understanding Well, you need to have a good
thinking about each other, when you have a good thinking as a lot of is to the example of the
prophets, who taught us he said that have personal done, have Krishna has done what is crystal done
is having good thoughts about your you know, beloved once beat your father, mother, spouse,
children, siblings, anyone have good thought process, as a principle as a base, no one is bad, think
		
00:42:23 --> 00:43:11
			about it as a bass in a sense, everyone is good, but there are certain things are the qualities of
the people or the behavior of the people that is bad. So that can be corrected inshallah. So, work
with this principle and have this this understanding, good understanding, number two trust, when you
have understanding, obviously, it builds what it builds trust, and this trust is so strong, that you
do not want to hear about that person from any third person. And that gives us another very
important thing, and that is communication. Today, we break relationships. Why? Because we do not
communicate which with each other, or we communicate in a very improper way, in a very unethical
		
00:43:11 --> 00:43:24
			way. Or we don't know how to communicate with each other, we lack vocabulary, we lack words, which
are good, we lack goodness, in our words, ceman Allah, Allah subhanaw taala says in the Quran,
		
00:43:25 --> 00:44:20
			speak good to people, good is defined as good words, the word the choice of words, that you and I
use in our lives must be good and Subhanallah many times when there is a breakup in relationship,
the problem is we do not want to communicate, we do not want to communicate with each other. So, how
is it possible that you can bring a solution without communication. So, the first thing you and I
have to understand is to manage relations, we need to have communication, clear, comprehensive
communication, this is very important, you know, when even if you have a difference of opinion, sit
and talk, speak, speak out, respectfully speak out. Many times when you communicate, things can be
		
00:44:20 --> 00:44:59
			sorted out, relationships can be can be, you know, saved Subhanallah it is quite sad reality that we
are facing in the world today that the relationships are breaking up because of petty, tiny, trivial
issues. Allahu Akbar, the separation between husband and wife is happening quite often why there is
no scope of communication between them. You know, children are breaking up with their parents. Why?
Because there is a gap of communication Subhan Allah so communicate with
		
00:45:00 --> 00:45:48
			each other and make sure that this communication goes with respect, with clarity, with confidence
with, you know, keeping up things straight insha Allah. So communication is again, a very important
thing and have patience when when you want to manage patients, Allah subhanho wa Taala him has
created us, you know and made us for each other as a test Subhanallah He made us as a test with each
other. So we are living in this world full of tests and everyone around us is a part of that test.
When they are a part of test what do we need to do? We need to be patient, we need to carry on that
relationship with Allah Subhana Allah has blessed us with with patience. And remember, go back to
		
00:45:48 --> 00:46:39
			the principle that we have talked about when you work on terms of Allah Buddha is when you are
patient, you're not patient because of that person. Remember that? Many times we do this mistake
that you know, I'm being very patient, for you know, it's not for that person. It's for Allah
reason. Why? Because it's Allah who said in Allah Subhan Allah is with those who are patient. Why?
Because Allah said those who have patience will have what paradise Jana inshallah so what can that
person give to me what that can person punished to me nothing, right. So I should be patient for the
sake of Allah Subhana huhtala with that person, when your aim is that big, that that's that's how
		
00:46:39 --> 00:47:28
			your aim is you don't get engaged in trivial issues. Your purpose is very high, you are created with
a higher goal with a higher purpose and not as to please Allah subhanaw taala and to benefit
humanity. So when you're patient, be patient for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala gratitude,
relationships required gratitude, give the sense of thanksgiving to each other. today. We think that
it's a it's a it's a big thing or it's a very wrong thing to say thank you to each other Subhan
Allah, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he said, He who does not be grateful to people, he
who does not thankful to people are not thankful to Allah subhanho wa Taala So you and I can't or
		
00:47:28 --> 00:48:18
			you can't be thankful to people who have done probably little with us, how can we be thankful to
Allah subhanaw taala has done so much to us. So make sure you show the attitude of gratitude towards
people and that also manages your relationships inshallah. Also my beloved brothers and sisters,
managing relationships, one of the tips requires is forgiveness. SubhanAllah forgiveness is
something which is so important these days. You and I mark these words, you and I can never manage
relationships, without the element or the quality or the ability of forgiving each other. And again,
forgive each other not because of that person, but because of Allah subhanho wa Taala because our
		
00:48:18 --> 00:49:09
			rewards in Algeria Illa Allah Allah, our reward lies with Allah subhanho wa Taala and Subhana Allah
a lot of malaria, he says in Surah Surah number 24 and number 22 a lot of malaria he says, forgive,
overlook the false pardon them Don't you want a lot to forgive you? Meaning when we forgive people,
Allah does what he forgives us, when we are kind to people Allah will be kind to us. So make sure
you have this quality of forgiveness. And this forgiveness is very much to do with making sure that
you forget the things which have been done in the past and you look forward for the present and you
move forward in the future inshallah. So forgiveness is something which is very, very important to
		
00:49:09 --> 00:49:56
			manage your relationships, healthier inshallah. Many times we might manage relationships, but but
they're not on healthy terms. They're not beautiful, they don't have that fruits of enjoyment
Subhanallah those pleasurable moments will not be there in that in that relationship. Why because
you still have that goal. You still have that grudges, you still have that that animosity, that
hatred in the heart, and that becomes heavy and that became black that became hard that becomes
harsh, that you are not able to forgive people. SubhanAllah when you forgive people, you will make
sure that your heart will be lighter. And people ask me questions. You know how long I say until we
		
00:49:56 --> 00:49:59
			die. Why? Because forgiveness is an act of good
		
00:50:00 --> 00:50:45
			And we will make sure this act of goodness will lead us until we die in sha Allah and even after we
die, we have to gain janai inshallah. And to do that, to achieve that, we need to make sure that we
forgive people. And forgiving people means forgetting what they have done to us and making our heart
clean and clear. Insha Allah, also my beloved brothers and sisters, in order to manage
relationships, we need to have the element of mercy, kindness, sympathy and empathy towards people.
If there is no gentleness, you know, Allah subhanaw taala, through the prophets of Allah instill
them, gave us guidance, so beautiful, he said, Allahu Akbar, my beloved brothers and sisters, he
		
00:50:45 --> 00:51:48
			said, whenever gentleness, kindness, blends with anything, it be, it becomes more beautiful, it
generates what kindness panela so when you and I are kind with each other, merciful to each other,
we're bound to manage relationships. Insha, Allah is an Allahu taala one of the key tips that I want
to give to you, and to myself as an advisor is my beloved brothers and sisters. We are we expect
from people when we do things Subhan Allah, when I love you, I want you to love me back. And this is
Subhan Allah, we call it as love. But in reality, Islam has discarded this definition. And the
definition of Islam of love in Islam is something very beautiful. The definition of love in Islam is
		
00:51:48 --> 00:52:41
			that you will love others, regardless whether they love you back or not. Allahu Akbar, why because
if they have you, or you expect them to love you back, it means it is an exchange is nothing, you
know better than a business transaction. You love people regardless of what they do to you, or what
they, what they to do to you SubhanAllah. So you expect something, which is when it is not met. So
for example, when you love someone, and that person doesn't love you back, meaning he did not met
your standard of expectation, then you get frustrated, you get disappointed, you get you know,
agitated, and at the expense of all these things, you break up, that's not love in Islam, in Islam,
		
00:52:41 --> 00:53:08
			love is regardless of what the other person does, because you love for the sake of Allah, your love
for that person is there in your heart, in regardless whether that person loves you back or not, you
still keep on loving that person, that is true love In reality, and that has to be understood
because people have lot of expectations with each other. And if those expectations are not met, at
any given point, what happens, what happens?
		
00:53:09 --> 00:53:37
			issues, problems, difficulties, and breakups at the end of the day. So keep yourself as best as you
can, to live as non expectation life Subhan Allah, and this will give you a real happiness. Another
advice is to keep up the quality of care, compassion, in your life, in your relationships. So when
you have care, when you have
		
00:53:38 --> 00:54:34
			compassion in your relationship, that that that becomes more better and healthier. And it becomes it
gives the the fruits of happiness panela so care could be as little as opening the door for your,
for your elders, you know, greeting to someone whom you don't know. So this is something which
generates, you know, the energy for managing relationships, insha Allah and making sure that you
don't leave. Don't live in the past, but rather leave the past. Let me repeat, don't live in the
past, but leave the past people. They don't want to manage relationships for long because they want
to live in the past, what you have done, what what the person has done to you one year back two
		
00:54:34 --> 00:54:59
			years back five years back, you know, 10 years back, people keep that in their minds and hearts so
much so that they don't want to live without the past. But reality should be they have to leave the
past and they have to live in the present so that they can actually receive this present as a
present as a gift as a blessing and they need to move forward in their lives in the future,
inshallah
		
00:55:00 --> 00:55:52
			Allah, this is how you actually make and manage your relationships better and fruitful, insha Allah,
my beloved brothers and sisters, there are certain things that you and I have to also avoid at
times, and what are those things to avoid in managing relationships is we need to ensure that we
avoid, you know, extreme anger, we need to avoid anger, most of the time the relationship breaks up
because of the and, sir possible, you know, limits you know of anger Subhanallah and this anger, you
and I are not free? Well, you know, we all get angry at one or the other other time. But to manage
that anger is very, very important because the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he said to the
		
00:55:52 --> 00:55:59
			one who asked Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and advice or prophet give me advice. He said,
		
00:56:00 --> 00:56:10
			Don't get angry, said lots of them. Don't get angry. He said, lots of them don't get angry. So why
did he say repeatedly this because this is a key
		
00:56:12 --> 00:57:02
			which breaks the relations Subhanallah if it's not controlled in a better way, it managed, you know,
in a right way, it actually spoils home. And this is one of the reasons of breaking of the managers
breaking of the relationships in general, my beloved brothers and sisters, in order to manage
relationships, we need to avoid extreme anger. Also, we need to ensure that we avoid negativity, you
know, relationship becomes really, you know, bad and unhealthy when it is blended with negativity.
You know, when you think about your beloved once be into your mother, father, spouse, children,
siblings, whoever it is, when you have negativity in your, when you were a negative frame, and you
		
00:57:02 --> 00:57:11
			see things, obviously, what are you going to see negative things. So when you want to manage
relationships, you need to ensure that you
		
00:57:13 --> 00:58:09
			make sure that you avoid negativity inshallah, in your lives. Also, you need to avoid suspicion, you
know, avoid suspicion, you know, many times relationships get tampered, and they actually driven
away. Why because they carry people carry the sense of suspicion in their lives, they always tried
to doubt about things, they try to take out mistakes about the things, you know, beat a husband, or
a wife or a mother or a father or a brother or a sister, whatever it is, avoid suspicion, because
many times suspicion is actually is what is a sin SubhanAllah. So avoid suspicion, avoid arguments,
you know, don't try to get into arguments again and again. SubhanAllah Yes, at times, you have a
		
00:58:09 --> 00:58:59
			difference of opinion, go back to the principle of respect, you can settle your affairs, you can
even for the separation, you have to be respectfully in that act in that state, you need to
respectfully depart at times. So, make sure that you avoid arguments during arguments what happens,
the temperature goes higher, our words will lose control, our mind will lose control. And as such,
we lose that loved one who cared for us for so many years, who loved us for so much, you know,
without any, any any materialistic, you know, you know, attraction SubhanAllah. So, avoid arguments
in order to manage relations in sha Allah, avoid ego, you know, Subhana Allah, in order to manage
		
00:58:59 --> 00:59:59
			relationships, it can never ever be managed, when you do not avoid when I do not avoid ego, we pump
ego so much that we give value to ourselves so much that we become obsessed with our personality, we
we try to develop the sense of superiority so much that we try to see things and people very low.
And as such, you don't care for them, you don't value them. And as such, you lose them. So managing
relationships means you need to really, really manage your ego, you know, we all have ego but then
if this ego takes a level where we actually lose control, then definitely It is something which is
really bad and Subhanallah the civility of caring, ego and pride can be understood.
		
01:00:00 --> 01:00:25
			With the Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam who said that a person who has the atom's
rate of pride will not get the fragments of Jana Allahu Akbar. So my beloved brothers and sisters,
you and I would want to go to the highest levels of Jenna, and hear the process of instead, who has
the ego will not get the fragments of Jenna, let us take
		
01:00:26 --> 01:00:55
			a very strong decision to make sure that we stop breaking up at the expense of fulfilling our egos
in our lives. Also, my beloved brothers and sisters, avoid injustice, you know, injustice is many
times it takes a turn towards that direction, which is destructive, which is wrong, which is unjust
and unfair. SubhanAllah avoid expecting perfection, this is very, very important. And I would like
to end with it.
		
01:00:56 --> 01:01:50
			Avoid perfection, you know, don't expect a person to be perfect, and neither don't expect yourself
to be perfect. We all are human beings, and meaning human beings have flaws have shortcomings have
weakness in our nature. SubhanAllah We are weak, right? So we can never, ever expect ourselves to be
perfect. Neither we can expect anyone to be to be perfect. So obviously, when we are not perfect, we
are bound to make mistakes, we're bound to commit certain, you know, things which are not desirable,
we're bound to have shortcomings. So embrace yourself, accept yourself and others, that they and I,
every one of us have shortcomings, and have good days as well. SubhanAllah. So when you expect
		
01:01:50 --> 01:02:37
			perfection, and you don't get what you expect, then what happens, you get into regret, eventually it
takes into breakup. So don't expect perfection with each other, we are all human beings, we have to
understand and accept and embrace and acknowledge our imperfection in you know, because naturally,
we are human beings, and we are bound to commit mistakes and shortcomings. You know, and we also
have goodness, so expect from people that they have goodness, and they have certain shortcomings.
When you have that clear expectations insha Allah you will be able to manage your relationships
better, healthier, and happier inshallah, and you will come out of the blaming game, you know, you
		
01:02:37 --> 01:03:24
			didn't do that you didn't, you know, fulfill my things you don't. So stop blaming, this also
corrupts relationship. So make sure my beloved brothers and sisters, we avoid these things, we
follow these advices. And we work on the principles we fulfill those demands that we have talked
about, make sure that relationship is very, very valuable. You value it, you think about it, you
keep in your heart, you put it in your action, choose the right words, and make sure that we don't
get into breaking up. We don't, you know, get into a state or a situation of relationship crisis, my
beloved beloved brothers and sisters, as we heard from the Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu sallam,
		
01:03:24 --> 01:04:16
			as we heard from the ayat of the Quran, relationships are very valuable. Let us make sure that we
keep up those relationships. Let us make sure that we maintain and manage these relationships, let
us uphold ties with each other. So that insha Allah, we will be able to live happily in this world
and we will be able to enjoy the real bless enjoyment, pleasure, satisfaction, glory, in the
hereafter by Allah subhanho wa Taala in the highest levels of jhana which we all are aiming for, let
us work towards it, let us act towards it. Let us make sure that we be the consigner of the hearts
let us be the advisors of patients put entering tranquility My beloved brothers and sisters, I asked
		
01:04:16 --> 01:05:00
			Allah subhanaw taala to mend the relationships of every one of us, those who have broken up let us
make sure that we pick up a phone call, pick up mobile, pick up your phones and call to those whom
you have cut off for years altogether weeks altogether reconcile because this is the beauty that you
will enjoy that you have to make sure that you come together. Enjoy yourself by the relationship
that Allah has blessed you with. Make sure that you are not a person who breaks up the relationships
but a person who builds and manages and maintains relationships for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala
in the way of
		
01:05:00 --> 01:05:35
			Rasulullah Salallahu alaihe salam, following the path in the principles of Islam and by this way
insha Allah, Allah 's mercy will be on us and Allah help will be on us. Allah support will be on us
and as we know that a lot of Allah is he has the power of changing the hearts, Allah will change the
hearts, let us be the agent of goodness be the agent of welfare and develop the sense of
belongingness with each other so that we may enjoy in this world and the year after we are healed
Alana Anil hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen
		
01:05:43 --> 01:06:06
			does not allow Farren robotic allow fixtures for throwing light and knowledge and guiding us on such
an important topic tips to manage relationships. In fact, a few minutes back, I went to my wife and
told her I love you. And you shall I intend to call up my mom after salata Margaret to tell her that
I love you. And in front of everyone Today, I would like to tell you that I love you. And so
		
01:06:08 --> 01:06:47
			what are the Luffy and as you rightly mentioned, it gives her amazing pleasure in my heart to say
this and to get to know that they allow me to for the sake of Allah the Almighty hamdulillah shake
me I find the kindly find out from you, if you could kindly share a few minutes because we have
received up a number of questions related to the topic from our brothers and sisters so that they
would inshallah find some solution out of these problems that you could help them with. inshallah.
So I would like to take the first question from a sister who says sending Salaam to us. And she says
that the fathers generally in a family do not take responsibility of upbringing the children. And in
		
01:06:47 --> 01:07:18
			fact, they put it back on the mother saying that this is your responsibility to take care of the
children. And apparently she adds up saying that in spite of reminding such fathers to spare some
time and get into the family affairs, the fathers say that this is not my work, and they keep
themselves busy with their friends, not only during office hours, but also during the weekends. So
the sister apparently would like to know how she can deal with these kinds of fathers and is it not
their responsibility also, to take care of the children along with the mother.
		
01:07:19 --> 01:08:08
			So how to love the responsibility of upbringing the children is a shared responsibility. With a
father has a role, where the mother has a rule, it can never ever be separated and shared by one
party. Whenever such activity happens, where only mother takes up the role or where the father only
takes up the role, the children's upbringing, it can never be proper, and can never be as desired.
SubhanAllah. So at the first sister, as a doctor, you need to make sure that you take few moments.
And here goes my advice. take few moments, in the last part of the night.
		
01:08:09 --> 01:09:03
			Get up, wake up, and pray to Raka bare minimum as tahajjud and going to see Jude cry out to Allah
subhanho wa Taala when a lot of butter is comes down on the lowest part of the earth, of the
heavens, Allah as it suits to His Majesty, where Allah subhanaw taala calls out Is there anyone to
ask so that I can give Subhana Allah at that moment, my beloved sister, cry out, ask Allah Subhana
Allah, Allah helped my father to be to let him correct his affairs, let him be responsible, let him
take up the the role of a father Subhan Allah, the role of a father, my beloved brothers and
sisters, and I give my attention here to the brothers, to the husbands to the fathers. This is
		
01:09:03 --> 01:09:45
			something which is very, very crucial You and I have to make sure that we have to be the partner.
And what is partner a partner is not one person a partner is you have to have that partnership with
someone. And to Pamela This is a supportive role. You both husband and wife has to make sure that
you get into a partnership of the growth and the development of the children Subhanallah and this
can never ever be isolated or given to one party at any given time. This is the first advice My
beloved sister that you call out and pray to Allah subhanaw taala and this is toll free, you know
any time anywhere you can call but the best timing is what I have advised you in the last part of
		
01:09:45 --> 01:09:59
			the night where a lot of malaria comes to the lowest part of the heaven and ask you so ask a lot of
Melissa for that number one make dua number two counsel many times daughters can make counseling or
you know, a very vote to the to the
		
01:10:00 --> 01:10:04
			The fathers and show them remind them, you know, a lot of ERISA, he says,
		
01:10:05 --> 01:10:51
			remind them as the reminder benefits the believers, and I'm sure he being a believer hamdulillah he
will be reminded in sha Allah many times because of the bad company, because of the outside world.
We give importance to the outsiders so much forgetting the beloved, the beauty, the pleasure, the
real joy lies right in our homes and Subhanallah by, you know, calling out to Allah, and by advising
and reminding and don't lose hope. Don't ever think that my father is not going to change never,
never, ever lose in the hope in the mercy of Allah subhanho wa Taala not talking to me Rahmatullah.
So keep up your hope and in the mercy of Allah, keep trying, keep trying, don't give up, your father
		
01:10:51 --> 01:11:26
			would never give up, your mother would never give up on your own children. So we as children also
should not give up. Many times, the children, they remind us about our responsibility, or the wives,
they remind us about our responsibility, or at times remind our spouses, our wives for their
responsibility. So my beloved sister, this is what you can do, inshallah, and I asked, and I asked
everyone to ask for such fathers to make them responsible insha Allah in their life, so that they
can not be held accountable in the Hereafter, which is going to be very, very challenging. Sharla
		
01:11:29 --> 01:11:34
			does not allow that and that reminds me myself, and inshallah puts me back on track as well.
		
01:11:35 --> 01:12:30
			We do have one more question coming up from a sister. And the question is, the sister asks, What if
a man was not related at all, to her, gives her gifts? What should she understand of that kind of
gifts and that kind of relationship and how should her reaction to him be right now, when a stranger
gives gifts to a sister, and obviously, that stranger knows that sister, even though she does not
know that person knows that sister, that person wants something from that, from that person, expect
something. So, obviously, taking gifts from a stranger is definitely something which is which brings
so many questions into play, if that person is a stranger, obviously, his or her Muharram which
		
01:12:30 --> 01:13:19
			means is not related to you. So in Islam, we have certain barriers, certain parameters for sisters
in particular and brothers as well. But sisters in particular, there are certain boundaries that you
need to you know, keep always in your life and these boundaries are not comes as a burden, it comes
as a protection, it comes as a mercy from Allah subhanho wa Taala because it provides that
protection that safe zone to you and to everyone. So sister, you have to report back to your elders
when you get such kind of gifts from a stranger report back to your elder and and and and, you know,
let that person put to task meaning he should be held into communication and ask what's the point?
		
01:13:19 --> 01:13:53
			What's the reason of giving gifts to my daughter or to my sister, what's the matter you know, and
investigate and try to find out more detail about that person, why is he interested in giving gifts
and you know, foster finding out the reasons you know, you can judge based on that, but we need to
make sure that you immediately reject these these kinds of gifts from strangers and also report back
to your elders so that inshallah these things can be properly you know, set up inshallah
		
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			once again, and there's yet another important question, if time permits, we at least proceed asking
you the same Miss Bella.
		
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			Sister again, as requested, what if, after a long time of the relationship between her and her
husband is still not good? To the extent that she feels really sad about it for over decades
together? How should she manage that kind of relationship in spite of she putting a lot a lot of
efforts to reconcile between her husband or her in laws?
		
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			Right, such kind of cases Subhan Allah for everyone out you who are facing or who are actually
struggling in in a similar situation. I ask Allah subhanaw taala to ease your affairs and grand
peace to you in your lives. My dear sisters have definitely This is ironic to see such kind of
behavior from the husband's from the people around such as
		
01:15:00 --> 01:15:49
			blessing because you know the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he said, You know, this dunya is
a pleasure and the greatest pleasure in this dunya is Subhana Allah, a righteous wife, so Subhan
Allah, when you actually don't attend when you actually don't value, the wife vindale when she's a
blessing, this is something which is quite sad, disappointing and ironic. Subhan Allah, may Allah
will Riza correct the husband's affair in regards with this, many times, sisters, you need to
understand and take quick, swift steps. You know, many times, the sisters become quite complacent,
meaning they try to think that patience means bearing injustice, bearing that which is wrong,
		
01:15:49 --> 01:16:41
			bearing that which is unrequired. That's not really patience. Patience is you stand for the truth,
you bear. Protect yourself from that which is wrong. So one of the parts of wrongdoing is injustice.
So many times the sisters are being are done injustice to an extent that they can they live like
slaves Subhan Allah, may Allah protect us from that. So, so idea is, sister You need to make sure
that you stay strong. And you need to clarify, don't just live in that relationship with Taz. No
pleasure, no, you know, point of satisfaction and Allah, but talk, communicate, bring up your elders
understand what's going on. What's the affair many times assistance, they don't get involved, the
		
01:16:41 --> 01:17:17
			elders, many times the sisters they don't talk to, to their husbands, many times, sisters, they
don't think that they have to take certain steps. They don't have to spend decades all together for
for no reason. Rather, you need to understand that you need to communicate number one, ask
straightforward, respectfully questions which are very powerful and meaningful. What's wrong with
you? What is wrong with me? What is the matter? Let's settle down, let's resolve Are you not happy
with me are what are the expectations that you have, so I can fulfill so communication?
		
01:17:18 --> 01:18:04
			asking each other, you know, resolve a lot, you know, perhaps that person has not married you
because of his choice. Perhaps that person is you know, having a different expectations altogether.
So all these can be sorted out and can be evaluated when you communicate at your level. But if you
see that this communication is not working anymore, bring your elders that's what the school the
principle of Quran and Islam is you bring up the elders of your family and talk with this guy, talk
with his brother, understand what's the matter and if that again doesn't resolve involve his elders
also and try to you know, get into certain conclusion which is good for both the parties and
		
01:18:04 --> 01:18:50
			SubhanAllah. By this, you will be able to inshallah, by the will and the permission of Allah be able
to resolve the matters. Again, I remind myself and all of you to follow the principles. What a lot
of Billerica has said, he said was terino with Sabri was Salah, seek the help and support from Allah
through patience and prayer. And as I said, patient does not mean you bear in justice, rather you
speak up for the truth, respectfully in a disciplined manner, in a nice manner, not losing your
temper or control and have that that consciousness of Allah subhanaw taala when you speak so
patience and prayer is something which is which are very powerful tools of of gaining the support
		
01:18:50 --> 01:18:57
			from Allah subhanaw taala. And a lot of Vanessa is the best one who is the Disposer of affairs
		
01:18:59 --> 01:19:45
			does not allow cowrie shells. Just one last question in sha Allah seems to be quite important. And
this has been asked by a brother on behalf of his friends. And the question is, how do we react with
relatives who are apparently quite richer? And who try to look down upon us because we are slightly
poorer compared to them? And how long can we bear those insults that they really put forward all the
time? Right, this is a very, very important question definitely, which needs to be addressed and
Subhanallah we see this in society, which is a very common practice. And what we need to do is we
need to make sure that we keep on reminding those kinds of people, we need to be accessible to those
		
01:19:45 --> 01:20:00
			people and we need to give them a you know, the teaching and understanding that it is not because of
the money because of the wealth because of the you know property because of the worldly status that
a person
		
01:20:00 --> 01:20:46
			gets richer. The person gets richer because of his heart, the quality of hearts makes a person
richer. And because of that, Allah subhanaw taala. In an era, he will count on hearts, not on the
faces, not on the riches, not on the race, not on the nationality, not on the stages, not on any
other grounds in love with taqwa, except with Taco Bell, with consciousness of Allah. And as the
Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he said, taqwa Hakuna Matata Hakuna taqwa hoonah the taqwa lies
in the heart. The taqwa lies in the heart and the taqwa lies in the heart, so your heart is richer,
it is definitely reflecting that the person is rich. If that heart is not richer, then obviously all
		
01:20:46 --> 01:21:30
			these you know, status, all this, you know, wealth, it's not going to help. So reminding each other
is is definitely a powerful way. And sometimes you need to tie up a contact, who is of similar
level, who is perhaps also rich, but very humble. And that's the person whom you need to find out
within your family. Perhaps there might be someone who has to counsel that person, perhaps they
might not listen to you, perhaps they might not give even importance to you, perhaps they might not
even value you. So you need to find out a person who is of equal caliber, yet very humble, yet,
Allah conscious yet who gives importance to poor relatives. Indeed, this is a heinous crime, to look
		
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			down upon someone based on their status of this world. This is something which is which is actually
an offense in the sight of Allah subhanho wa Taala. So they need to be reminded, if they are with
good heart, many people, they get corrected, they get into a real, you know, attached to the
principles of Islam and in sha Allah, we we hope that this relationship can can be sorted out as
well. And Allah knows best.
		
01:21:59 --> 01:22:10
			sha Allah, does Allah Harris shake once again, even though I said that should be the last question,
but there is one important question inshallah after which we could try to conclude the session. And
the question is,
		
01:22:11 --> 01:22:52
			a Hindu brother who accepted Islam is quite enthusiastic to share the message of Islam with his
family members. And every time he does that, his family members who are not Muslim, as at the
moment, cut off the relationship. So the Buddha apparently wants to know how we can maintain the
relationship with them while he conveys the message of Islam to them. Subhana Allah, this is, again,
a very, very important question. And I asked Allah subhanho wa Taala, to give firmness, strength and
stability to this brother, upon his faith, indeed, my beloved brother, you have done the greatest
decision that you have made to become a person who is submissive to Allah subhanaw taala in the
		
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			state of Islam being a Muslim when hamdulillah indeed, any big decision comes with big trials and
tribulations, big tests comes on the way to those who have a bigger purpose in life and you have
defined a you have find out the purpose in your life and that is to worship Allah subhanho wa Taala.
So obviously, on the way there'll be a full of struggle, hard work and sacrifices. Now, when it
comes to dealing with non Muslim parents, by a Muslim, you know, person or family member is very,
very sensitive Subhan Allah, we find in this beautiful in the example of Ibrahim alayhis salam, for
example, in the life of life of Ibrahim alayhis salaam, we know that Allah subhanho wa Taala
		
01:23:47 --> 01:24:40
			mentioned in the Quran, the way he actually addressed his father by stating your ability, and Allah
Ma, the scholars have taken this very behind, and they said, yeah, it has lot of meaning in this. It
has the highest form of respect, love, affection, care, compassion, and so much of that Subhanallah
so what we learn is even though his father was an idol maker, and an idol worshiper, still he
addressed his his father as yeah ability or my father, you know, Lima, terrible Dune, why do you
wish of that which cannot hear which cannot harm you, which cannot benefit you. So the way he dealt
with his family member, particularly the father was extremely kind. So the dear brother, what you
		
01:24:40 --> 01:25:00
			need to understand is perhaps your family members, they are not at the similar level that you are
on. Maybe you have taken this decision, and you have gone way higher in terms of intellectuality in
terms of understanding and valuing yourself and Islam. What how
		
01:25:00 --> 01:25:56
			Vanilla, but perhaps your parents are still, you know, not able to cope up with that understanding.
So what I would advise you is, do not try to remind them again and again, don't get into arguments
or engage with them in the matters of worship again and again. Rather, you try initially, to make
them feel that you have changed completely, you know, you will not like the one, how you are now
meaning you became the most obedient child, you became the most loving Brother, you became the most
responsible Brother, you became the most kind person, you became the most generous person, you
became the most lovable person. So you try to show up your character, which comes from the spring of
		
01:25:56 --> 01:26:46
			Islamic teachings, you show up your characters so beautifully well, that it reflects without even
you say something, they would definitely question themselves. Why is he acting like that? Why is he
behaving like that? What changed him? What transformation was made? How did it happen? So slowly and
slowly, when they try to get into closeness to you? You can now and then you can remind them in a
logical way, at the beginning, that you know, how can we worship something which does not benefit or
harm? How can we worship the creation leaving the creator? So I chose this way. So what I would
advise is this, show up your character, remind them not very frequently, but look at the right
		
01:26:46 --> 01:27:33
			timings. Sometimes the right message at the wrong time gives negative results. So you need to make
sure as a lot of resources. Although Illa Seville erotica bill hikma, invite to the way of your
Lord, with wisdom with beautiful preachings. You know, and engage with them in them in the ways that
are most gracious, Subhan Allah, so do your brother, make sure that you show up your character,
remind them at times about the toast of Allah subhanaw taala, but the oneness of Allah in a logical
way in Islamic way, and then make dua one of the powerful attributes of all the prophets and the
messengers in all the righteous people of the past in the present is they make dua for the guidance
		
01:27:33 --> 01:27:58
			of the people and more importantly for your own parents. So make dua insha Allah, Allah or Buddha is
I asked, you know, Allah, to to guidance as as he guided you, in Islam, insha Allah so that they can
enjoy the bliss in this world and in the hereafter. Thank you so much. Well, actually, I wanna and
hamdulillahi Rabbil alameen
		
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			Zakat roboticle off.
		
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			As always, your sessions are always very, very easy to understand. And there's a lot of takeaway for
all of us. We ask Allah the Almighty to preserve you for the benefit of oma amin, my dear brothers
and sisters once again, you all have been very wonderful audience. And we allow the almighty keep
the spirit of learning and seeking knowledge alive. In all of us. We allow increases in knowledge
and always help us keep our relationships alive in the Islamic perspective. I mean, my request all
my brothers and sisters to please do keep following up as offer updates on social media, Whatsapp
and try and please join us for the forthcoming sessions in the future in sha Allah. I live I live
		
01:28:44 --> 01:28:51
			you now in the care of Allah Jazakallah Heron robotic Allah faecal salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa
barakato.