Abu Taymiyyah – EMOTIONAL My Child Is Not Responding To Allah
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AI: Transcript ©
My beloved brothers and sisters,
from the most common questions
that I receive
on a regular basis is one asking,
why is it that I don't feel that
connection with Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala?
Why is it that I don't feel that
love that I should have
for my Creator Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala, the
Almighty Sustainer?
I want to have a relationship with Allah
I want to taste the sweetness of Ibadah.
And likewise from the parents, they ask,
I want my child
to have that connection with Allah.
When I tell him not to do something,
that he doesn't end up doing it,
Why is
it that they don't have the relationship that
they should with Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala
and I hope to insha Allahu Ta'ala in
this khutbah
to elaborate on this bayanilahi albari.
My beloved brothers and sisters,
there is a hadith
that should frighten every
parent,
someone who has been
given a responsibility with regards to his children.
The Messenger Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam he said,
There is not an individual who has been
given responsibility,
I. E. Here his kids.
The day when he dies, he dies as
someone who is a Arash,
someone who deceived his children.
Why would somebody deceive his children?
Why would someone
deceive his children before departing from this wawd?
And then the Messenger sallallahu alaihi wasallam tells
us,
illa haram Allahu alaihiil Jannah,
except that Allah
will make the Jannah haram upon this individual.
What is it that
he failed in? Was it because he didn't
put a roof over their heads? No. This
is not what the messenger salallahu alayhi wasalam
is speaking about.
Even though this is a seminar is extremely
important,
is it because
he did not
financially
put them in a good position.
No. This is not again what the hadith
is speaking about even though it is extremely
important.
Right?
And one is
applauded
for looking after their family,
making sure that they are financially in a
good place. This is something that he is
praised for, commended for but the hadith is
not speaking about this my brothers and my
sisters.
So how does an individual now die as
having deceived his children
when Allah
makes the jannah haram upon him?
The Messenger sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, he said,
walam yuhit hab binusay.
He did not advise them accordingly.
He did not give them the correct Islamic
education.
If we are honest with ourselves my brothers
and my sisters, the first step to solving
a problem
is to identify that there is a problem.
It's one thing identifying the problem, it's another
finding the solution.
However, if we are in denial,
my beloved brothers and sisters,
we will not even think about
the solution that is needed
to help us navigate
and maneuver
around these challenges that we
as a community on a societal level
is facing,
right? We are under attack let's be honest
my brothers and my sisters,
right? There is a war
against
the mind of this child. They go to
these universities which I call
a breathing ground
for Kufar,
Sheikh,
feminism,
liberalism,
secularism and of course
the rainbow team are extremely active,
right? Extremely
extremely active,
shoving down their throats and rubbing on their
faces
that which
was abnormal once upon a time. And I'm
just quoting how society
looked at these things
in all of these years that have come
past. Anyways, my brothers and my sisters,
they go to these schools where their minds
are polluted
and their brains are hijacked.
However, when they come home my brothers and
my sisters,
what is it that we do now
to better their understanding of the Deen,
to change their world view, to have an
impact on it,
right,
they are in need of Islamic education
more than any time in history.
Right?
In previous times, my brothers and my sisters,
if we look through the Quran as to
why Allah Azzawajal destroyed,
right? The people of Midian, the people of
Hud, the people of Samud, the people of
Lot.
Right? Would you agree my brothers and my
sisters, in this time
we have
so many of these reasonings
as to why Allah
destroyed these fascinations.
Every now and again, there would be that
which these societies
spread and engaged in, and Allah Azza wa
Jal destroyed them for it. You could maybe
count the problems that they had on one
hand,
and Allah Azza wa Jal punished them for
it. However, in today's day and age it's
on a completely different level and I don't
think I need to spell that out to
my brothers and my sisters.
Today my brothers and my sisters, a child
comes home,
right?
Do we ever engage with
these children that may have been polluted when
they went to school?
Right?
Some parents, the only relationship that they have
with their children is the back of the
hand,
Tarbahdin as they say in Somali language.
Only when he's done something wrong, this is
when he engages with him or converses with
him, pulls him into a meeting.
Say what about the rest of the time?
There are some parents my brothers and masters
every single night,
every single night, and it's not easy and
nothing in life comes easy.
They sit with them not because they've done
something wrong, let me just engage with them.
Let me see how they're doing.
Right? One of the benefits that we can
take from Surah D'yousef, right at the beginning
when he saw that dream,
I saw 11 stars of the sun and
the moon all prostrating to me. Remember, Yusuf
had a lot of brothers,
he had many brothers, but as soon as
he saw that dream who did he go
running to?
None other than his father Yaqub,
Right? Alayhi Salatu Wa Salaam.
That shows us that he was extremely comfortable
around him.
He could have chosen to go to his
brothers, but the father was the closest to
him.
Right? Again, a common question that parents tend
to ask, why is it that my child
doesn't want to maybe
have that friendly relationship with me but he
wants to go with others?
Maybe my beloved brothers and sisters
simply because there is no connection there,
We barely ever speak to them or barely
ever have a good time with them.
They might be at home, right?
And we are busy with the TV.
Again let's just be honest with ourselves.
We are busy watching series after series after
series on Netflix
and we don't want them to
distract us.
So watching the TV series after series after
series Netflix, Amazon,
Hollywood, Bollywood, Somollywood
right while the children
they want attention
and every child wants and craves attention.
Right.
What do we do? We give them
these gadgets, these electronical gadgets.
And I'm a Jerul,
you know, busy yourself with that.
Right?
Now, to my brothers and my sisters, the
child doesn't have 2 parents anymore, it's not
just 2,
it's not just 2 parents. The child has
3 parents.
The mother, the father and also these gadgets.
These gadgets, these electronical Ipads and phones and
whatever have you,
are shaping
the way
they end up becoming as human beings with
all that which they keep laying their eyes
on.
An auntie one time called me and she
said, Muhammad,
please speak to my daughter, I was like
why?
What does she do now?
She's asking me to buy her a miniskirt,
a telephone miniskirt, I think everyone knows what
miniskirt is, right? What women wear when they
go to the club.
The auntie saying to me, I don't wear
it, her sisters don't wear it, why does
she wanna wear it?
Like this child, she spends the majority of
her time on TikTok.
What is she looking at? The parent has
no idea.
These Fasiqaat,
these Fajiraat,
right? These women who wear these very revealing
clothes, and she keeps looking at it, looking
at it, looking at it all the time,
and then she becomes desensitized to it.
What does desensitization
mean?
You know my brothers and my sisters, there
are people the moment they hear a bit
of music,
it makes them feel uncomfortable because they're not
used to hearing it. But maybe others
because they hear the music on the advertisement
on the TV all the time, it just
becomes like normal,
nothing moves
inside of you.
A lot of people will testify to this,
you go for imra, you spend 3 months
there, or 2 months there, or 1 month,
and then you come back, you walk in
the subway, environment, and our heart keeps
being penetrated,
right, and pierce into with the environment that
we live in, again it just becomes normalized.
Right. This is just how things are.
Alakulihaal
my beloved brothers and sisters,
especially at this moment in time,
where we live in a very sexualized
society,
everything is telling you, Hey Talaq, let's get
it on, let's come and do haram.
Right? We, not just our children, every one
of us here,
we are in need
of revisiting.
Right?
Who Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala is.
The more we learn about Allah Subhanahu Wa
Ta'ala, my beloved brothers and sisters,
as some of the righteous scholars of the
past would say like
Whoever
has more knowledge of Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
this individual my brothers and my sisters will
be a lot more conscious of Allahu Jala
fee'ullah.
And he will be a lot more inclined
in doing acts of worship,
right? And he will be further away
from sinning.
At Tawhid
monotheism my brothers and my sisters,
we will not be able to maneuver and
navigate
around these modern day ideologies,
and a lot of these temptations that is
inviting us to a zina
except by knowledge.
And knowledge my brothers and my sisters,
knowing who Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is.
And the only source of knowledge that we
have of Allah
is none other than his names and attributes.
My brothers and my sisters in the second
part of the Khutba I'm going to read
out
personal messages that I've received
of young people
who are sick
and tired of the sins that they are
falling into,
not knowing why this is actually happening to
them,
You know my brothers and my sisters, a
lot of the time what happens is,
right?
We tell people don't do this, don't do
that. Right?
We tell them this is haram, this is
halal.
And then we begin to think that Islam
is so rough and tough.
Why is Islam so restrictive?
Even the Shabaab, I speak to a lot
of them.
Once upon a time, they thought to themselves,
you know, Islam is stopping me from enjoying
myself.
I want to have a relationship with her
and then
there's Molly,
or Molvi,
or the Sheikh.
Right?
He's telling me don't do it when everyone
is enjoying themselves on a Friday night,
And he's telling me stay at home,
right.
You know when I say to them now,
I told you this when you don't want
to take it go do as you wish.
Go do as you wish,
right?
Maybe you will join this long queue
of young brothers and sisters who are messaging
me saying,
I fell into this Haram
and now I'm absolutely devastated,
I need a way out.
Remember this my brothers and my sisters,
everything that Allah commanded you with and told
you to stay away from, it is in
your own best interest
whether you see it or not.
This is just one of the emails that
I received the other day, 20 year old
man, this is the title,
Zina,
it's written on there.
You know what he says?
Assalamu alaikum Sheikh, please can you help me?
I've done Zina for almost a year now
with many many girls.
I am completely broken,
empty and I don't want to live anymore.
My family doesn't know what I've done, only
my mother.
Everyone who looks at me says I look
lifeless.
I've lost my appetite for food,
lost the will to go on. I really
need some advice, please.
Messages are many, my brothers and my sisters.
Assalamu Alaikum, I'm an 18 year old girl.
I was a good Muslim, I
stopped praying
I stopped praying, I stopped being religious, I
have no idea what's happening to me, why
I've become such a bad person now, what
the * happened.
This wasn't supposed to happen ever.
Was this ever supposed to happen? I'm so
deeply unhappy.
I am so regretful and I don't have
the stability or the motivation
to go back and I don't think I
can.
Right?
Messages after messages after messages.
Hi, my name is and then she says
her name, I'm 16 years old.
I'm going through a lot of pain, depression,
stress, sadness.
I truly need your help,
please help me I was in a haram
relationship.
I fell in love very hard and I
left and he left me,
but I still love him. I cry every
night knowing nothing will work out.
I pray I want to have a relationship
with Allah. I want to be better, but
shaytan is not a Amy.
Sometimes
or something always happens when I try to
be a good person. I watch your videos
most of my times. I truly need your
help.
Help me make dua for me I'm still
young.
Many many messages like this my beloved brothers
and sisters,
right.
This quote was
the more knowledge we have of Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala who he is,
right? The more my brothers and my sisters
one will be conscious of Allah
and the more he will be inclined in
doing acts of worship
and the further and more distant he will
be from sinning.
Let me give you guys a number of
examples my brothers and my sisters,
how internalizing
the names of Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
has an impact on our day to day
lives.
Let's be honest here, there are people that
we respect
in society today.
A lot of the shabab, they really like
this guy, and I'm sure some of the
parents know who he is as well. They
really like Andrew Tate,
Right? Why do they like Andrew Tate? Because
of all the things they came to know
about him. By the way, this is not
an endorsement.
This is just me giving an example for
relatability.
Why do they like listening to him because
of all of his accomplishments,
the way he carries himself. Yesterday I asked
the young brother why do you like him
because he speaks the hak,
speaks the truth. Young brother came from Belgium,
I asked him.
I said to him the reason why you
respect him is because of all the things
you came to know about him. He goes,
yeah,
of course.
I feel like I know him a lot
better than maybe what 2 years ago.
Sahay.
My brothers and my sisters, likewise, why does
a young brother
marry a specific sister why does he love
her more than everyone else
Because of all the things they came to
know about her.
So this is just
natural human instinct.
We love people, we respect them, right?
Simply because of all the things that we
came to know about them.
When we are in their presence, we will
not
disrespect them, we will not speak out when
they are there
simply because of the respect
that we have for them.
Not that I'm trying to compare any of
these people now to Allah,
right? But my brothers and my sisters,
how do we expect to have a connection
or to love Allah
when we know absolutely
nothing about him?
Today we might say to the child memorize
Quran, do salah, he doesn't even know who
he's praying to.
Laia alifu anilahi shayan.
So he eventually will end up rebelling.
You're telling him pray, pray to who? Who
is this lord that I'm praying to?
No one is doing it at school.
Okay. That's Quran that I've been forced to
memorize.
What am I doing?
La you alifu anilahi
shayyah.
Doesn't know anything about Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala.
So how is it supposed to impact him
my brothers and my sisters?
Right? I'll give you guys an example of
a lady who was very conscious of Allah,
Ibn Rajaib Rahmatullahi Alaihi. He mentions this, right?
They were in the Sahara.
They were in a desert, and there was
a male and a female Bedouin.
A male and a female Bedouin.
He tried to seduce her.
Right?
He tried to,
right, make love with her.
And then he's she he noticed that she
was getting a bit scared.
He said to her,
why are you scared?
Right?
The only thing that can see us
is what the stars.
Right?
She turned around to him. This is someone
who understood who Allah Azzawajal is.
Even when I'm in private,
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala is still watching me.
Her response to this man was
Where's the one that created
these stars?
It shook this man.
A woman that understood who As Sameer,
Al Basir,
Al Raqim.
Right?
The one who's watching over me that knows
every step that I take and every move
that I make. We are under the blanket
even young and old, right?
Sometimes even the husband, he's looking at Haram
and he's watching his wife, she can't see
me let me just quickly look at it.
Have we really internalized who Allah is?
And him being Al Muntaqim,
the avenger that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
will hold us to account for everything that
we do a lot of the time.
When we sin my brothers and my sisters
we think that the only time you have
to answer to Allah is when you meet
him on yomr qiyama
and that the sins are not going to
come back to haunt us.
The sins my brothers and my sisters have
a consequence
It begins to affect us in so many
different ways.
Knowing that Allah has
the capability,
right,
to swallow you inside of the earth and
to remove
some of your body parts and that which
we take for granted.
I have a friend my brothers and my
sisters,
at the time he was in Stamford Bridge,
the Chelsea Stadium.
By evening he lost his ability to walk,
to talk, to hear,
right? He lost it, he was in a
wheelchair.
Not because of a car crash, but he
lost everything.
Allah tells us in the Quran,
If Allah wanted, he will remove your ability
to hear and your ability to see.
Understanding the Qudra of Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala,
this is instilled within them and it is
repeated and repeated and repeated of who Allah
azza wa Jal is The more they learn
or they more sorry the more they keep
hearing about it the more they becomes a
part of an individual and that's with anything
my brothers and my sisters,
right?
Another example my brothers and my sisters I
really really like to mention,
And this is a love story.
Umr ibn Khattab radiAllahu ta'ala Anhu one night
was patrolling the streets of
Madinah and then he got very tired, him
and his servants the people that were working
with him and I'm going to finish with
this.
When he got tired he began to lean
on one of the houses
And of course the houses back then
were not like the houses today. You can
hear the conversations that are taking place.
So a conversation was taking place between a
mother and her daughter.
The mother says to her,
get up, oh daughter.
Go and mix water with milk,
so they can sell more in the morning.
She says to her mother
have you not heard what Umar ibn Khattab
Anu sanctioned or passed as a law this
afternoon?
Right. What did he say, Shasa?
That you cannot mix
water with
leban,
water with milk.
Bearing in mind my brothers and my sisters
something that the imrul Qayyim says, just to
give you an
idea how Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala will open
doors for you because of your Tawhid.
He said
Because of your relationship with Allah,
because of your tuhid, your monotheism,
right? Allah will open doors
of happiness
and goodness.
Look what happens to this young lady.
Because of a tawhid,
She said,
right, Umar said this this afternoon, madam, we
can't do this. Haram.
Right?
She said to her, oh daughter
nobody can see you, not to Omar or
any of his servants, get up and mix
the water with the milk.
She said to her,
write a statement that should be written in
gold,
if
If Umar cannot see me but the Lord
of Umar Al Khattab can
see me.
Umar is listening to this conversation.
What does he do? Did he drag the
mother out of the house? No, he didn't
do that.
He went home next morning.
He lined up his children, who's ready to
get married?
SubhanAllah. This young lady was inside of our
house, misskeena,
but she internalized who Allah azza wa jal
is,
right?
Sometimes our sisters may say wallahi
if I don't wear makeup outside
or if I don't show some of my
skin who's going to find out where I
am?
Wallahi, there was a sister that came up
to me, I just came back from Canada
in Montreal,
and she said
she wasn't wearing hijab at the university, she
came with her 3 friends, they were all
wearing hijab except her.
She said please brother advise me I want
to wear the hijab but my mother is
stopping me from wearing the hijab.
I asked some of the brothers why would
they do that Cause it's very well known
in certain cultures
that they want them to show their hair
and their beauty
so they can eventually end up getting married
and find love,
right?
Sometimes the sisters they feel the need to
do this,
right?
What happened my brothers and my sisters?
Omar lined up his sons, Esam said I
am ready.
And Esam ended up getting married to this
righteous young lady.
What did Al Mutaim say?
Tawhid opens the door of goodness and happiness.
Are you telling me she never got happy
when she got married?
Where did it all stem up from? Her
being conscious of who Allah azza wa jal
is. He can see me. Right?
Later on my brothers and my sisters, they
had a daughter called Layla. She ended up
getting married.
They eventually ended up having a son called
Umar ibn Abdul Aziz.
Umar ibn Abdul Aziz doesn't need an introduction.
Today, when the scholars,
they talk about the 4 Khalifa,
even though he was number 8 after the
prophet, they mentioned him as number 5 because
of how righteous he was. Understanding
my brothers and my sisters, and I am
going to quickly mention this, I really want
to mention it, right?
That Allah is Adil,
Allah azza wa Jal is fair and just,
someone wronged you. Sometimes we feel the need
to
repel the bad with another bad, 2 wrongs
don't make a right.
Not realizing that Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala is
watching and He will give you retribution
the same way Allah Azza wa Jal gave
retribution to Yusuf alaihis salam.
Right?
His brothers they used their hands right to
throw him in the well and the wife
of Al Aziz she accused him with his
tongue with a tongue.
He did this he did that when he
never done anything.
Yousef has done the right thing, eventually later
on, look
how fair Allah is. The same hands that
they used to throw him in the well,
it was the same hands that says,
Be charitable towards us when the famine struck.
And then later on that very tongue
she admitted that she was wrong
and she what?
Testified that he was actually the one in
the right.
This is Allah and this is what he
does for his servants when they do the
right thing.