Episode 12/26: Jealousy (Part 1/2)
Abu Abdissalam – Purification Of The Soul – EP12
AI: Summary ©
The segment discusses factors that contribute to envy, including anger, pride, and desire for fame. It also describes factors that make one look bad, such as fear of losing goals or finding one's place. The negative effects of envy include cutting hair, causing feelings of envy, and causing feelings of desire for a new car. People should focus on their own values and use them as opportunities to improve their behavior.
AI: Summary ©
Jealousy
narrated jabil, even altaic the prophet may Allah peace and blessings be upon him said, there is jealousy which Allah loves and jealousy which Allah hates. that which Allah loves is jealousy regarding a matter of doubt. And that which Allah hates, is jealousy regarding something which is not doubtful. There is pride which Allah hates, and pride which Allah loves. that which Allah loves is a man's pride when fighting and when given sadaqa. And that which Allah hates his pride shown by oppression, the narrator Musa said, by boasting
Assalamu alaikum, and welcome to another episode of purification of the soul. And the last episode, we were speaking about hazard or envy. And we mentioned the definition of hazard. What is the definition of hazard? Is that any desiring that someone removed his blood blessings from Allah, exactly, somebody has a blessing, like a car, like a job, a nice job, nice children, nice wife. And Nice job, for example, and he wishes that our last pantalla removes the blessing from that person. And this is the envy. What's the difference between that and the rest?
envious when you want to deprive one that hasn't been deprived of that blessing? Yeah, well, scripta is when you want that thing, but you also want him to help keep it? Yes. In other words, you don't want to deprive him of that blessing. And you want something similar for yourself. This is not all types of Lydda is, is haram. In fact, most of it is is praiseworthy, sometimes it can be praiseworthy.
Well, let's have a look at some of the causes of envy of hazard, and we spoke about them in the last episode. First and foremost, I think was hatred,
and enmity
of a person. So that person may he, he may dislike this person. And if when that person attains a good quality, good characteristic to the talent or something like this blessing could blessing who his hatred of the person would increase. Yeah, and what what do we mean by blessing? What is
it something that Allah has bestowed upon him? Yes. And I'm a lover. I like that something that Allah Spanish, Allah has given us a blessing for you. Yeah. And what was the next cause?
low self esteem, low self esteem, low self esteem. So he, you know, he doesn't want other people to have sent blessings. So that they raised in ranks. Yeah, feels that person's significance is compromised when someone else has attained something that, you know, is when someone else has attained something, and he finds it difficult to watch someone overtaking. So whenever something someone else has given knowledge, or wealth or, or things like this, then he gets an inferiority complex. And this is no self esteem. Yeah, he doesn't want that. In the opposite. Is someone feeling so proud? proud? Yeah, exactly. And how does this get him to have envy? He had that he thinks
himself better than somebody else. Why should he have? Why don't? Why don't I have this thing? I'm better than him. Yeah, that's the third reason for envy. Moving on to the fourth reason, astonishment.
A person is so amazed and astonished that how can other people be distinguished from them? How can someone who's either lower than them or equal to them or have the same status? How can they be given a blessing that Allah hasn't given given me, for example? So this is a this is the three or four courses that we've mentioned. The fifth cause of envy is fear of losing one's aims. And we gave some examples about that.
Example, yeah, yeah, fear of losing one's common aim growth.
For example, a person in a workplace his aim is to, you know, get promoted, become a manager. And he sees somebody else who's more intelligent and more hardworking, who's getting promoted. So his aim of become manager could be lost because this other person is could take this take his place. So it becomes envious of that person. Yeah. And he wishes he wishes that the person removes that
position so he can become the manager. Exactly. And that's, that's very common in the workplace when two rivals there
vying for the same position. So anytime that person he says something good, or he's praised by the manager, for example, then one lowers him down. Okay, one speaks badly about him out of envy, out of envy. Another example of that saying the married life.
Or they could be a co OS. Yeah. And it could be one show compete with each other, earn the love of the husband. So one of them could, you know, do something that's probably more love to the husband. And the other would be the in the shoe be even more envious of me. So for example, the husband mentioned something about one of his wives, the other the other wife gets really envious, or any kind of anything that she does, she's got a nice, new, shiny dress, for example, or gum. So the other one co wife, she gets really jealous that, you know, why is she wearing this, why she got this dress, I want her to be removed of this blessing from Allah subhanaw taala. Why because it is in
it is compromising the love that I'm trying to get from him. So this is the way that it could be manifesta. The sixth reason for envy is love of leadership and status. So this is when a person who is very talented in a particular field, if the person has been accustomed to being praised, and complimented for his skill, then he will find it difficult not to envy another person who is up and coming in the same field. So when he has, for example, people praising the newcomer, who's gaining popularity in his own discipline, then he is saddened by this. And he wishes that this blessing be removed or this talent be removed from he from his rival. And it is not pride that leads him to do
this. It's not arrogance, it's not enmity, it's not fearing or losing his aims that leads into this enemy. Envy, it is rather simply the love of being singled out as a leader in his field, and the fear of losing that status. So we can see this a lot in the workplace, for example.
You know, a person he's good at. He's good at. You mentioned the example last week about the painter. You mentioned the example of the painter, in the last episode, how one painter he does something. He's a fantastic designer. But when somebody praises another designer, he gets envious, and he wishes that that person removes the quality or is removed of that quality of being able to paint well. And this is the essence of envy, the crux of envy, let's have a recap of the crux of envy, that you wish for a blessing of presence to be removed from him. Yes, that you wish for a blessing to be removed from him. And envy is not that you just desire something more that you want
the same as that guy. This is not envy. This is, as we said, envy and the reason it's so prohibited in Islam and it's a major sin. The reason why it is so prohibited in Islam is because you're desiring that the other person doesn't get this blessing. In other words, you're angry with the with the culture or the destiny of a Lost Planet.
Most Dangerous when there's only one position available, yes, like a leader or something where you can't have the same blessing. Yes, unless he loses it. And so the person who if he doesn't control is nvn insha, Allah, we will actually go on to see some of the ways that a person can remove envy from his heart. And actually, this is a very, very important issue. A lot of people find envy in themselves. And this can lead all the way up to people like scholars, one scholar, one student of knowledge, he has envy of another one. Okay, because he's more popular, for example, and this is totally Haram in Islam. So a person must always have humility must realize, in himself and if he
does get this envy, he has to know how to remove that and inshallah we'll talk about that later on. The seventh reason for envy is simple impurity in the soul. And this leads a person to rejoice at the calamities of others and feel saddened by their blessings. This really is an unpleasant state to be in. It's bad enough when a person is stingy with his own wealth. But what about the one who's stingy with the wealth of the last one done with the possession of Allah, but the blessings of Allah. So it's as if it's as if others are taking from the blessings that Allah has bestowed upon him? Does he not realize that a Lost Planet Allah, He favors whoever he wishes, without any kind of
count without any limit, and the blessings of Allah subhanaw taala bestowed on others do not actually limit the blessings that he can attain himself. And this is really a sick state. And it's the problem with this is lack of lack of taqwa lack of clarity, lack of faith, because a person simply gets upset when other people
When they're given blessings from Allah, and it's a sick state to be in, really, if you actually ponder logically about the state, it's a sick disgusting state to be in. Because the person himself is just being stingy with the blessings of Allah, as if you know, as if to say that Allah can only bless this person.
So these are some of the causes of envy, and sometimes envy in a particular person, it can be caused by more than one or even all of these cases or all of these causes. And so we've seen some very, very dangerous and dangerous effects of envy. We looked at some examples. And I want to go more, a bit more into some of these examples. And perhaps we'll look before the break at some of the remedies, and then we'll expand on that after the break, inshallah, we looked at the example of the colleague, the colleague, the co worker,
once he feels this kind of envy, what should he do to remove it? What do you think?
Um, first of all, he should
think, not have hatred for the other person, so maybe make dua for him, you know, that wish him well. And my brother, Allah provides him with something better or equal, also, without depriving him of that, how would this help the envy
because then he would no longer feel that he the person is deprived of that blessing. So therefore being he'll begin to accept the color of
the critical? Yeah. So this is why it's a good point, and we'll mention it, we'll expand on that later is when a person he has envy he makes to offer the one that he has envy, of imagine that that is really from a man that you wish you wish for the other person. Or you make dua for the other person to be raised in status to be given more of these blessings. Okay, when a person does this, he forces the enemy out of his heart. And maybe before that, he can seek refugee, he can see refuge in Allah, from this, and this is again, he can make dua to Allah to remove the envy, because Allah is the one who created him. Yeah, I Allah moment. haluk doesn't know what he created? Of course he
does. Does this show on gratefulness to Allah so that, you know, content with the blessing is given Yes. And this is one of the dangers of envy. As I said, it's one of the reasons why envy is prohibited is because you're actually being stingy with the blessings of Allah being ungrateful that Aladdin didn't give him that particular blessing even though it was given him so many other blessings. inshallah, after the break, we'll actually have a look at some of the remedies for nV saramonic.
which aims to answer your questions about your deen your faith, your way of life, this course, is Islam, this is a totally different price, but I divided the payment over this period of time. And the seller is the person or the firm which owns it mature mind for businesses action is
Assalamualaikum. And welcome back.
Before the break, we were talking about some of the causes of envy. And we were talking about some of the evil effects of envy.
There's so many examples in real life scenarios. And we can all think of many, many examples, I'm sure when we sit down and actually think about them, and it's so important to keep away from these things.
Let's have a look at some more examples. Because,
for example,
in a bold person has got much hair, and he sees someone with a nice long, last long hair, very nice long hair and he he wants to be like him, you know is envious of that person. So he wishes to you know, at nighttime going to cut his hair off, you know? Because he can't.
So that could be an example. Yeah. What about you? When someone is envious about other person jacket? So he went?
Yeah.
Hey, leave my jacket. Okay.
Yeah, so what did he do? He went there to rip him off. Oh, yeah.
And you can say also like in sports, there might be a person from a football I'll take a person.
Sport you know, and so the person will be able to control
In the book, another person may be envious of this soldier uniform, he might try and physically damage that person. So he can't, he can't, he can't play him.
Okay? That's some very vivid examples there. But we can see that it is very, it is a dangerous and serious disease, we can often joke about it, but in reality, it is really a serious disease. Because the person himself he feels cut up, and it harms himself, as well as other people. But primarily, it harms the person himself who is envious. it harms him in this life. And it harms him into Africa in this life. He realizes, in fact, he can't, he can't actually harm the one who is being invaded. In actuality, what he's doing is harming himself. Why? Because he's sitting there, getting cut, cut up, he's thinking about it preoccupying himself with the long hair or with the, you know, the football,
he is getting bad qualities inside and exactly inside, this may lead on to anger, malice, rancor, it's like a vivid circle. The guy's envious because of because he was angry. And then because of this envy, it goes back to further anger, further malice, further rancor, further hatred, and even increase in his low self esteem was exactly as you said, it's just a one. It isn't just something it's a philosophical spiral. And if the person doesn't actually get out of that spiral, then he's gonna get more and more envious. And then after a while, he'll come to a situation where he won't actually realize how deep he he's in this envy, how he's drowning in this envy, and such that the
people around him may even realize this prize is blatantly envious. It doesn't help the situation at all. It doesn't help the situation. So that's why he has to learn the remedies of envy. And probably his Eman is probably stupid. He goes down it perhaps we can just pray, how would it weaken your prayer, you will not be able to control ratio, how can a person who's envious and he's drowning in envy, have cushaw is about to pray, but he's thinking about the blessing that somebody else has got given by virtue, which means
concentration and humility, in his prayer. And so person, how can you concentrate to Allah and keep his heart solely for for a loss when he's ungrateful and his ungrateful for the cream of the year. And he's also ungrateful with a decree of Allah. So, envy is such an disgusting sin, that it leads from one thing to another, to another to another, and it can have devastating consequences. So this is in this life. How about the acid, about the effort because the envious person he is really earning the Wrath of Allah subhanaw taala. he's not, he's not doing what he should be doing. Because these diseases they come in many people, it's not something that is abnormal, many people will get
the shaitan will try to attack
each person and we looked at some of the traps of shaytaan. So he will try to attack a person with this major sin of envy. But what the person has to do, he has to fight against the shaitan, he has to wage jihad against his own soul, and against the shaitaan. So that he can move away remove this, these bad qualities. And this goes with all of the bad qualities that a person has. Let's have a look at what some of the people
in the area said about envy. I think envy can affect the supply that lead you will ask for more rather than to thank God on the gifts you give a give it you. And I think that the one who prays to God, he has to be pure. From inside that make the Salah will be accepted as the decree of Allah will happen. What matters effects are the factors, the conditions of the environment. However, the Angus will never gain anything of his of being envious, because he will neither gain himself in power or the power of others.
As he will never reach a solution without going further away from the decree over land water allowance. When it comes to think negative negative thinking,
the person will tend to be more aggressive, and also will try to think anything else around them in a much more, you know, native way.
Some interesting points mentioned.
So we can see again, the evil effects of envy. Let's talk more about some of the effects of envy. What What can What does what could it lead a person
to do in terms of sins, in terms of things that he might regret later.
anything of that nature, it may lead him to kill someone
How would that be? Yeah. And when he's amphis, about other person, and he have a lot of bad feelings towards him, then he can we see this in the West a lot. Yeah, just to touch on that person, if he had low self esteem in the beginning, and he was envious of someone around increasing his low self esteem, so much so that he might become extremely depressed, might have to take antidepressants. And we've seen in the media that antidepressants, excessive amount of them will just lead a person to commit suicide. And this is happening in the West and England, for example, or America, the suicide rate is huge. And as you said, it could be because of antidepressants, and these this could have
been because of envious the person sitting. I mean, we see this a lot. It's not something that is not common in the papers all the time, you see examples where a person has, has killed, for example, a wife is envious, rightly so in one sense that the husband has taken on a mistress. Okay, hold on. But what this leads her to do is to go and kill the husband or to kill the woman, the mistress. So even though the beginning of that that type of envy was allowed,
because that wasn't a blessing, that it wasn't a blessing for the person. In fact, when he took the mistress, this was not a blessing. This is a sin that he's done. So the beginnings of that envy was allowed, but it led her to do something which is haram, like killing. And so Likewise, the example you said of antidepressants, and you can see very clearly why this is such a psychological disease. Because a person he he builds himself up in this envy, and he just ends up doing some crazy things, because he's an envy is a little bit like love. How's that the case? Grace?
How envy is like love? Yes. How could MVP like love similar to love, in certain cases, like of the some of you could get obsessed by it obsession, obsession. And this is why we did you know, dwelling on this is because it is so calm, obsession with envy, or with the object of envy. And so a person is obsessed with, you know, a lover, for example, and love also can lead to envy. So they're all kind of intertwined. Some of these, these diseases of the heart, how would we how would one remedy envy in terms of thinking and knowledge and these kind of things?
Maybe if he was to seek knowledge, about the benefits of envy, yes, even though and that's why we were discussing, as such length, some of the evils of envy, because then he will know his place will know that it's not actually a good thing, the sin of envy, both in this world and in the hereafter.
So I think,
Professor, some advise us to read sort of Falak often which has this a second rep, what does it mean?
When Sheree has it in either said, Yes, called Rob Bell Falak. I say, I seek refuge from the Lord of the daybreak. We shall we mahalo from the evil of what he has created. And until the ayah, comes woman shabby, has it in either hazard, and also from the evil of the hassad, the envious one, when he envisioned this goes on to the issue of AI, where the Prophet slicin and he said that I knew how an AI is like the evil eye. And some people they have evil eye due to envy.
And what they should do if they have that they should say, Mashallah, to Barack Obama, and other people they have, they just have the evil eye. And the prophets lie, Selim said that I know how the evil is true. So in that case, again, one has to just remedy it by saying Mashallah, it's about a color. But the point that we're concerned with at the moment, is the evil eye that is related to hazard, to envy. And of course, this is, this is bad, this is not something good, this is not something that one can, this is something that one can control. And if this if it is something that one can control, therefore, it is something that is hollow. So that's to do with the sort of, sort
of follow up there. And we can see also examples from the Sahaba, where one person he had the evil eye on another, and they complained to the prophets, I sell them, and so on and so forth, and the proper size and remedy that I mentioned in this race, so there's
so one can maybe realize that he's not deserving of any of the blessings that he he doesn't have a right to the blessings from Allah, that all the blessings that come
an extra thing a bonus. Yesterday, he doesn't get it. He's intent. So that's kind of curing one's greed. I want that new car. I want that new house that somebody else has not
Something similar but I want that one. This is an or I want that person to be removed of this. In that scenario, yeah, one way of curing it is to ponder about the fact that really allows blisters so much. But we haven't actually deserved those blessings. We don't worship a lot the way that angels worship Allah and even if one was the most pious of people on this earth, He hasn't reached the level of the angels who worship Allah continuously, without any kind of slacking.
So yeah, these are different cures. We'll go more into detail about these remedies in sha Allah. In the next episode, where we'll talk about practical ways. One can actually cure this disease of envy, whether it's with knowledge, or whether it's with action, well, Salatu was Salam robotica ala nabina, Muhammad Ali, he was
a Salam alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh