Abu Abdissalam – Purification Of The Soul – EP08

			What can the Liga Fina eco hum in Marina
		

			de de Mercator? Well,
		

			King john, who know
		

			what a king john
		

			d v min Nasha
		

			mineva Deena, are in La Casa de
		

			la la de la Houma, Santa
		

			Ana
		

			backbiting
		

			Malik related to me from Waleed even Abdullah even said that Alamo Talib, even Abdullah ibn hunted
and masumi informed him that a man asked the Messenger of Allah, may Allah peace and blessings be
upon him. What is backbiting? The Messenger of Allah, may Allah peace and blessings be upon him
said, it is to mention about a man what he does not want to hear.
		

			He said, messenger of Allah, even if it's true, the Messenger of Allah, may Allah says peace and
blessings be upon him said, If you utter something false, then it is slander.
		

			Assalamu alaikum. And welcome to another episode of purification of the soul.
		

			We were speaking about some of the diseases of the heart and of the soul. We said that in order to
purify ourselves, we have to do one of two things. What are they good enough to
		

			clean cleanser, two of the bad things
		

			to increase in the good good things? Yes. So we have to cleanse as all of the bad things and then
increase our souls of the good characteristics of the soul. And in the last episode, we were talking
about backbiting, what's the definition of backbiting? Baha was saying things about people while
they are not with us. That's what some people say, is the definition. What's a more precise
definition, saying something which the person would not like to be said about him? Exactly as the
Prophet slicin himself, the crook, a haka be my Accra mentioning your brother in a way that he
doesn't like? Now there are certain reasons why people backbite What are those reasons it could do
		

			to could be with paper, perhaps he's around with friends, and they all doing it, and he'll feel left
out if he doesn't do?
		

			Well, they just do it for chatting, and wasting time.
		

			doing similar thing, that he doesn't like the person. So you mentioned bad things in front of other
people so that they don't like him either. So it could be to do with envy, jealousy. I think the
root of this is that his his or hers, he man is very weak, because of the control over the tongue is
non existent.
		

			So let's look at some of the cures of this disease of backbiting. And in fact, even slander, so we
should have a look at some of these cures. First and foremost, we should realize that the one who is
backbiting he will actually be incurring the Wrath of Allah subhanaw taala. We should reflect about
the verses of the Quran, and the statements of the Prophet size of them, that censure The one who
back bites and praise those who restrain their tongues, a Lost Planet, Allah says in the Quran, or
do they think that we do not hear their secrets and their private councils? Indeed we do. And our
messengers are by them to record that. Likewise, our Lost Planet Allah we should realize is all Hara
		

			all sia. We cannot hide anything from Allah. We can't do or say anything. Without a Lost Planet,
Allah knowing. We should know that in all of our gatherings allies also present with his knowledge,
seeing and hearing and we should therefore speak at times at all times, in a way that is appropriate
to speak in front of Allah Spano. tala, Allah says in the Quran, whatever phrase he utters, and
observe is present. Now, imagine the prophets lie Selim was coming to your house. Okay. Imagine that
there was an opportunity that the Prophet of Allah sallallahu Sallam was coming to us. What changes
would you make in your house, garage,
		

			get get rid of anything that was deemed to be evil
		

			TV
		

			etc, okay, well, I will, I will not change in the house, I will change it myself. So to be much
more,
		

			it's a very valuable thing to see. So, what do you think? Really just following on from both of
them, actually, I would say that our trucks remove any, any of the dirt present in my house, whether
they that includes myself, my soul,
		

			and what is present in the house. So therefore, I would have to change my characteristics, as well
as changing the manner of my house. So imagine the province of someone's in gathering, how would you
speak?
		

			We wouldn't speak to your respect, but you'd make sure your your manners are good. You wouldn't do
any backbiting or swearing or if someone actually greater than the prophet SAW Salem? Who's, who can
hear, who can see and who can.
		

			Who knows about everything that we say, in all gatherings. Allah subhanaw taala. So imagine if
that's how we would behave in front of the prophets, I seldom and we should know that Allah pantalla
sees us all the time, that he hears us all the time. He knows us what we're saying all the time. So
therefore, this is one of the key factors that will stop a person from doing any harm, including
this action of backbiting. The prophets why Selim said, Men can mean rubella he will Yamanaka
failure called hiren. Olia Smith, and he said, it is in Bukhari and Muslim. Whoever believes in
Allah and the Last Day, then let him speak good or remain silent. So we should refrain from speaking
		

			anything unless it is good.
		

			The prophet SAW Selim guaranteed someone paradise if he saved himself from two things, if he could
God two parts of his body, what are those, his tongue is exactly his tongue, and his private parts.
So the prophet SAW Selim said, Whoever God's that which is between his jaws, and that which is
between his two legs, as in the tongue in the private parts, then I will guarantee him entrance to
paradise. Imagine that. Imagine that a person if he guarantees his tongue and his paradise and his
private parts, and act correctly, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam will guarantee him
paradise. So it's very dangerous to take what we say, with our tongues lightly. It's very easy to
		

			flap our tongues, but the consequences of that can be detrimental. This is why the prophets I sent
him said that when the son of Adam gets up in the morning, each of his limbs implore his tongue
saying, Fear Allah regarding us, because we follow you, if you do right, we will also do right. But
if you do wrong, then we will also do wrong. How is this the case? How is it that depending on what
the tongue says, the limbs follow? Good rough, I guess.
		

			You know, what the tongue says, affects the rest of the body. Because you may say something to
somebody. And, you know, as a result, he may react in a bad way. And then the rest of the limbs have
to react accordingly. Also, but what about what why should the tongue? Why did the promises and
what's the meaning of this? Hadeeth? Why did the promises him say that all the limbs they ask about
the tongue? Because if the tongue, the tongue was the thing that will get examined into the fire, to
*, and then obviously the rest of the limbs would have to suffer? Exactly, absolutely. So the
tongue is the thing that often gets people into the Hellfire men love protectors from that Sami. And
		

			because of that all of the limbs have to suffer. And this is one reason. In fact, if we were in
gatherings in which Muslims are being back within, we should remember the statement of the Prophet
sallallahu Sallam that whoever stops that which dishonored his brother, then Allah will shield his
face against the fire on the Day of Judgment. Who of us does not need this? Allah will shield his
fight his face against the fire on the Day of Judgment, who doesn't need our faces to be shield,
shielded from the Hellfire in the depth judgment? We all need that. So why is it that we don't rush
to defend the honor of our fellow Muslims, when people are attacking them? The second way of
		

			stopping ourselves from backbiting is that we should realize that Allah will never forgive the
person who back bites, until the one who he backed with who he had back written, also forgives him.
It's actually a condition for a last one, to accept the repentance of his servants, that if they
transgress against another slave of Allah, then that person has to forgive him before a Lost Planet
Allah forgives him
		

			if you know that if you tell the person that you back with him, if that causes more problems between
you Okay, so there's a way around this. There's a way around this person he back bit, another person
and then he wants to repent for that. He knows that oh, this person has to forgive me. Okay, could
do one of two things. He can either go up to the person say, Hey, I spoke badly of you. Please
forgive me. If he knows that the person he's a client
		

			A tolerant person, and this, he would be able to forgive him, then this is the best course of action
to take. And it's the safest course. However, if the person thinks that, oh, if I mentioned that I
backed him, to him, this will cause him to harbor ill feelings against me. And it might give him
fit. And I might give him problems, that how is he gonna, you know, React back with me? How is he
going to control and it's difficult if someone comes to you and says, You know, I backed with you,
then you start thinking, How can I trust that person. And so it has an effect on the other person as
well. So if you know that, it's going to be the case where you think that's going to be the case,
		

			then perhaps a better way to, to, to, to deal with this is to make the offer of the person in
private, to make the offer the person in private and to mention him in the same gatherings that he
banked with him, but in good light, in good luck. So I spoke about the person for example, and if
somebody said about him, oh, he's horrible person, whatever. He's thick, he's stupid. He's done
these kind of these kind of issues. Then when I want to repent, I of course, I have to ask Allah
subhanaw taala for repentance, but then also, after that, one has to say, either ask the person for
his forgiveness, or alternatively, make the offer the person in private, does the person have to
		

			forgive? No, he doesn't have to forgive. And this is the very thing that should stop a person from
backbiting. He should remember that Allah subhanaw taala will never forgive the person. It is
actually conditioned for a lost to accept the repentance of his servants, if they transgress against
someone else, he must forgive them. This person must forgive him before Allah, Allah forgives him.
So it's easy for a lot of forgive, because he's the most merciful. He's the forgiver. He's the one
who has been the one who has back bitten is not All Merciful. He's not all forgiving, and so on and
so forth. And so therefore, once you remember, remember this when he's about to back by and the
		

			Prophet said that the one who is bankrupt from Mumbai oma is the one who comes on the Day of
Judgment. He has a lot of prayer, charity, fasting to his credit, however, he insulted this person
struck that person sees the wealth of another. And because of this, his good deeds will be taken
from him, then if his good deeds are exhausted, the sins of those whom he has wronged will be taken
from them, and and foisted from them, and then he'll be cast into the hellfire. And this is reported
by a Muslim. So that's why it's so important for us to actually avoid backbiting. And this is one of
the reasons and we'll touch about that more after the break in charm.
		

			People need each other's needs colors, more than they need to drink.
		

			And it's because even regarding what we drink and eat, we may not be able to figure it out, which is
permissible and which
		

			is not preserved. In the books called the Sierra Prophet Muhammad. Salah is not preserved in the
books, but on the heart, in the hearts of men, in the hearts of people who have devoted their time
to seek and
		

			believe and trust
		

			that none could take place. without the knowledge.
		

			Welcome back. In before the break, we were talking about the Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu
sallam, in which he said that the one who is bankrupt Muftis, from among my followers, is he who
comes on the death resurrection with prayer with charity and fasting to his credit, however, he had
insulted this person, strike that person and seize the wealth of another. And because of this, his
good deeds will be taken from him. Then if his good deeds are exhausted, the sins of those whom he
wronged will be taken from them, and will be forced upon him, and then he'll be cast into the fire.
And this is a very important Hadith and this should really stop a person from transgressing against
		

			another person. Because when a person who transgressions against Allah for example, he doesn't say
		

			against a Lost Planet Allah, Allah is Allah for Allah Rahim atone, okay, Allah is the forgiver. He's
the merciful. He's the one who relents and allows the slaves of Allah to repent to him. So all this
is a last pannacotta. But as for the human beings as father creation, they're weak, they're weak,
they're not forgiving. They're not all merciful. They're not, you know, all generous, all Kareem and
all that. So therefore, they may not forgive a person when he transgressors against him. And that's
why in this situation, you will ask him before the break about when, what if the person doesn't
forgive you, in that situation, you have no choice but to make die for him. Why because
		

			in a CRT, in a personality of hypocrisy at that the good deeds, they remove
		

			the remove the bad deeds, they remove the bad deeds, so the more a person displays good to another
person, he makes the art for him, he does extra deed, then inshallah these wipe away the bad deeds.
And this is why the muffler is the bankrupt one on the Day of Judgment. He's not the one who dies
without wealth. He's not the one who dies without wealth. He's the one who dies. And he came with
good deeds, he may be he may be fostered a lot, maybe he prayed a lot. Maybe he spent a lot in
charity. But
		

			that was to his credit, but against him, he's to back by slander hit this person. Okay, and all
these transgressions that he could do and unfortunately, this is very common among some people, who
may well pray a lot faster a lot, or give charity, but they have a problem with their tongues in
dealing with other people. And this may Allah protect us from this can lead a person to the
hellfire. Why? Because the other person he ends up taking all of his prayer, all his fasting is
Hajj, his charity, and so on and so forth. How about some people, when they see people who pray and
fasting or religious, doing these kind of things are backbiting and speaking ill sometimes puts them
		

			off from practice. And the danger is that these people look at these people will help, will they do
		

			an appropriate reaction? Because Well, it's not the right reaction to have one shouldn't judge Islam
by the Muslims. Okay, once you judge Islam by what is Islam, to become practicing, doesn't just
include praying, fasting, giving charity, and so on and so forth. One has to do that. But also on
top of that, one has to be to fulfill the rights of Allah, the Prophet cisilion, the rights of other
human beings as well. And that includes not reviling their honor, not backbiting them and slandering
them, and so on and so forth. And in fact, this is a greatest sin for that person, the person who
does this, he's not practicing, even though he may very well pray, gives
		

			fast he's not practicing. So therefore, one shouldn't look at him as an ambassador of Islam. And
controversially, one shouldn't say, Oh, look, these bearded people, this is what they do, therefore,
I'm not going to have a bit. Or these hijabi sisters, the sisters who are in a cowboy hat, this is
what they do. Therefore, I'm not gonna wear hijab, this is a misnomer, from this is a problem. And
this is a, in fact, this is a trap of Shakedown as well. Okay, let's have a look at some of the
interviews some of the
		

			some of the comments from some of the people on this topic that if we wanted to stop by backbiting,
I think we must start from ourselves, by not to back by the authors. And it's it would be very good
solution by starting from each other's, between each other, advise each other to stop by biting by
being closer to Allah, and being satisfied with what Allah gave us. And
		

			we should love each other more, and not looking to give other people. Well, what goes around comes
around at the end of the day, like I'm a true believer in karma. Therefore, anything you say about
someone behind their back will eventually get to them and people will talk about you behind your
back as well. So ultimately, it's really inconsequential to talk behind someone's back, it's really
useless, there's no need for it, because it'll just come back and attack you at the end of the day.
Like, there's no positive thing that can come out from it. It's always good to be upfront with
people and blunt with them, even if it means a confrontation. Because keeping something from someone
		

			even like if it's you think it'll hurt them. It'll just build a build up negative emotion more and
lead to something really negative at the end. So that's how I feel about it. It's affects the
relationships between you and God, negatively, and with your friends. Basically, backbiting or
backstabbing causes you to eventually start losing off your friends. I think that's pretty much a
punishment on its own, you know, you end up alone someday. So they're very interesting.
		

			points that they mentioned.
		

			Let's move on to the third
		

			way of how we can actually remove this disease of backbiting. And this is by preoccupying ourselves
with our own shortcomings. And this should make insignificant in our own eyes, the faults of others.
And it's why a mammal hasn't been basilea Rahim Allah. When did he die? We mentioned this earlier on
		

			when 110 of the Angela 110 isn't a nice date to remember because the amendment has an anniversary.
And also amounts of piano theory they both died in this year 110 of the history Why do we mention
these dates? We mentioned them because then a person can connect to who this great scholar is. He's
so close. He's only 110 years. He died after the one of the prophets icims is very close to the
prophet SAW similar Sahaba anyway, Mama hasn't been busted Rahim. Allah said that we used to remind
one another that whoever faults his brother on account of a sin that he had repented for it will be
punished by Allah by falling into it himself. And how many times have we seen this person criticizes
		

			someone else? Oh, so and so he did this and so on. So he did that sin backbiting in a bad way, not
advising, but in a bad way. What happens? One year later, two years later, Allah puts him in the
same boat, and he ends up doing the same thing. And so I want you to be careful. This is a general
rule or this is one of the statements of the author, one of the observations of this great scholar,
Imam has an adversity, he said is common. And I'm sure we've seen similar things like that. Abu
huraira radi Allahu anhu said, when one of you sees the dust in his brother's eye, but he fails to
see the crud in his own. I imagine he's got a whole, you know, big blog blob on his eye, but he
		

			can't see it. He only sees a tiny speck of dust in the other person's eye. So if a person
preoccupies himself with his own sins, He won't be falling into backbiting we should remember when
we're pointing the finger at someone that three fingers are pointing back to us, there's only one
finger that's pointing outwards. So we should remember the other three fingers. Fourthly, we should
keep in the company of righteous people. This is a very important way of keeping away from
backbiting. When someone's backbiting, get up and leave their company, the Prophet slicin said, the
likeness of a good companion. And a bad companion is that of a person caring Musk, and another who
		

			works the bellows. In other words, like a person who works with iron, the person caring musk might
give you some of it, or at very least, you will enjoy the pleasant scent. And the person with the
balance will either send your clothing or at least he'll make you suffer from the bad smell. Okay,
and we can see this. How many times have we seen people because of good company, they've been
affected in a good way. And because of bad company, they've been affected in a bad way. How can we
can we have some examples? Eisner brothers was quite close to me in college. And he was a nice
press, Allah used to do everything that you would expect. And slowly bit by bit, he started speaking
		

			a lot to some of the people who you know, not even Muslim. Speaking little by little by little, then
after what was happening, the faction who stopped spending more time and then eventually saw Prince
Allah. And he left he left the group.
		

			I mean, this is an extreme example, because the province license had been allegedly, while cofely
will share kitaoka Salah between a man and disbelief and polytheism is leaving the press. So the one
who doesn't praise not Muslim? And this is a very extreme example. Yes, but do you have any? I know
friend of one. He was
		

			he was with a good company, a religious group. And he was using to pray and go to the mosque. But
actually after a while he got with a bad company. And he also left arm left many examples we can
say, conversely, have you got any opposite? Yeah, I think I
		

			mean, just simple examples. And then
		

			sometimes you fall into backbiting, easily without noticing. But then if you if you decide to hang
around people who are very conscious of that, and then every time you fall into the remind you
exactly,
		

			that really becomes a habit that you don't mention. And that's what this this point is that to make
sure that we actually do hang around with those kind of people. The fifth point, how we can stop
backbiting is a very practical one that we can all do, as well and that is to make a firm and
determined resolution to stop. There was one scholar of the past. He said that I swore an oath that
for every time I backed by someone I would fast one day, I would fast one day and this became so
difficult for me. This wore me out since I would back by and then I'd end up fasting
		

			Then I resolve that for every time I backed by someone, I'll spend one silver coin one dinar in
charity. And then for the love of money, I gave up backbiting. And I'm sure we can all have some
general advice about how we can, you know, stop doing any kind of sin, in fact, by resolving to do
certain actions,
		

			like forcing myself to run 10 miles each time I beg, but yeah, that's a very good thing that you do.
So
		

			again, within a group, you could say that anytime one of us back bites, the other person gets a
punch from
		

			the head in the head. The head does not say if someone doesn't, doesn't pray, nor for repairs, and
he favored turning backwards or does any cynical stop praying, you can be 20 Records in fact, I know
somebody who used to do that every time I backed by I'll pray 20 hours of prayer and any of the
brothers characters actually very good. And you can see some of the things that he does for that
what other things can one do?
		

			Just to give him charity has given charity does not wash the dishes, maybe wash the dishes,
		

			because a lot of people you know don't
		

			maybe say washing dishes there'll be put off by that. Yeah, so every time I wash the dishes, okay,
taking a shower was a cold water shower examples, and I'm sure the viewers can think of some more
inshallah with this, we'll end today's episode and in the next episode,
		

			we should we will talk about some of the different times that we are allowed to backbite and I'm
sure this is quite,
		

			quite an interesting topic, inshallah. We'll see you next time. Assalamu alaykum warahmatullahi
wabarakatuh