Purification Of The Soul – EP07
Channel: Abu Abdissalam
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Episode 7/26: Backbiting (Part 1/3)
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backbiting narrated Abu huraira Allah's Apostle, may his peace and blessings be upon him said, Do you know what is backbiting? They the companion said, Allah and His apostle, know best, there upon he the Prophet melas peace and blessings be upon him said.
backbiting implies you're talking about your brother in a manner which he does not like. It was said to him. What is your opinion about this, that if I actually find that fault in my brother, which I made a mention of
he melas peace and blessings be upon him said, if that fault is actually found in him what you assert, you are in fact backbiting him. And if that is not in him, it is slander.
Assalamualaikum and welcome to another episode of purification of the soul.
In the last episode, we spoke about anger. And we said that this is one of the diseases of the heart of the soul that we need to remove ourselves, remove ourselves from and we said that
test gear to new foods or purification of the soul includes two things First and foremost, it includes purifying our soul or cleansing ourselves from the evil characteristics from its evil qualities. And then also then, after that to add or increase souls with good characteristics and this is the meaning of the word test skier. In this episode in the next few episodes, inshallah, we'll be talking about backbiting, slander, and tail caring. Now, backbiting wahiba in the Arabic language literally means backbiting and it comes from the Arabic root word hype. And hate means to be hidden or unseen. And this is because often when a person back bites another but this is not
always the case. But when a person often back bites another, he does so when the latter is not present. And backbiting is just simply the thoughtless utter of a few words, light on the tongue, but weighty in sin weighty on the scales. It could lead a person to the Hellfire the Prophet sallallahu Sallam said, Sometimes a person say something that pleases Allah, through which he is raised in rank. And sometimes he said something which displeases Allah, and so it takes him to the hellfire. So just these simple words can lead a person to the hellfire. And it's actually likely some scholars have said that a back biter will be punished on Yom Okayama by actually being ordered
to eat from the flesh of the dead bodies of those whom he used to backbite in the world in this world, and this will be presented to them in the form of dead meat. And it's narrated in the Hadith about Mirage when the prophets Elijah was sent up to the heavens and to the end, he saw the Hellfire, the Prophet sallallahu Sallam passed by people with copper fingernails. You can imagine this with copper fingernails with which they used to scratch they would scratch their own faces and chests with. And so the Prophet sallallahu Sallam asked, Who are these people or debris? And it was answered, those are the people who eat the flesh of other people and vilify their honor. Now we can
see how evil backbiting is in the Quran. Allah subhanaw taala says what that suggests so when I asked about the Kumbaya, I had to I had to come and yell coolala he made them forget what taco law in the law but do not spy no backbite one another. Would one of you eat the flesh of his dead brother? Surely you would love that you would hate it fair on light Indeed, Allah relents and is merciful. Now scholars of Islam have agreed that it is haram type backbite a person for no legitimate purpose. Most of them stated that it's actually a major sin and that it varies in degree, some of them some kinds being worse than others. Let's have some examples. So backbiting is of
different levels. Who can tell us but how can you tell us why it's of different levels? Why does backbiting very well
When you backbite scholar is much more bad than backbiting normal,
normal people. Yeah, exactly. Why because the scholar is the person who Allah says in the mouth shala him in either the hill Allah, it is only the Allah the scholars who have true fear of Allah subhanaw taala. So they're the ones who are close to Allah. Likewise our Lost Planet. Allah says in the Hadith, Cozzi, he said, Whoever has has taken a slave of mine or worship of mine, a friend or colleague of mine as an enemy, then he has taken me as his enemy. So this is something much worse than by watching a normal person. So it's of different levels. In the same way, some people actually backbite the Sahaba. they criticize a worker of the law, one of the law one man or the loved one
who, even though Allah, Allah says in the Quran, radi Allahu anhu what are the one allies pleased with them, and they are pleased with Allah. So these people, they've done something very disgusting, and they've actually like bit, the Sahaba the companions of the Prophet slicin imagine these people they backbite, the wife of the Prophet slicin and I shut up, they laugh at that. And so this is a great sin and therefore backbiting actually varies from person to person. The province of Iceland mentioned backbiting, alongside taking people's wealth unjustly and murdering them. He said, Your blood, your property and your honor are sacred to you, like the sacredness of this day, in this
place in this month, where where was he grace when he said this was in an alpha in alpha and RF is very sacred place, in fact, is one of the most sacred places in the world. RFI is where about which the prophets license it and had you out of a hedge is out of and that's the day when people gather together and then make dua to Allah on the night of the hedger, which I've given away the next question I was going to ask, which is when the prophet SAW Some said this, he said this on the ninth of the ledger, and again, this is one of the most sacred days and third hedger is one of the sacred months. So the prophets iclm said, it is more sacred than this. And this shows how important it is
to protect another Muslims honor and to avoid transgressing against him. Also, the prophets lie Selim is reported that he said, one of the greatest of the major sins is to stretch out one's tongue without right against the owner of a Muslim. And so the sin of backbiting is something great in the sight of a Lost Planet, Allah, in fact, I shadowed the lover and he said something that annoyed the Prophet salla. And he actually backed with another of the wives of the Prophet. Who could tell me more about that sphere of Yolanda. Sorry, when I showed the alarm, I made a comment about exactly what what did she say? I think she said that, it is sufficient to say she is such and such
indicating what did she mean by that, indicating that she was short?
And I think that was enough for the professor so on. And so the prophets Isilon, what did he say? He said, that, if you said a word that if it was mixed with the water of the sea, it would contaminate the sea, Allahu Akbar, look at this, the prophets I send them is explaining to eyeshot of the law, that this small statement, which is so easy to say, simple, simple statement also. And so, you know, she is sufficient to know that she's short. And we say this all the time, these kind of things. We hear this all the time. Okay. And the Prophet system said, if it could be mixed with the water in the sea, it would have such a great effect that it would pollute and contaminate the sea. And let's
have a few more examples of these kind of simple words that people say, but yet, it's actually great in the sight of Allah subhanaw taala.
Have you got any example that people don't think that it's actually backbiting? But it is? I mean, you could say that whenever people are describing a person to another person, he might he or she might say, Oh, she's a bit fit. Or she will see in this point, we'll see this is actually permissible form of backbiting, as long as the person he does it in order to just describe him, and we'll see this inshallah, in one of the future episodes, any more examples grew.
Examples, you know, to maybe mentioned a bad character about somebody, yes. Oh, he's, he's bad tempered. He's bad tempered. He's not. He doesn't have good even to say that he bites other people, the person's falling into backbiting. In fact, if someone asks you something, and he says, oh,
what do you know about this person? And he repeats he says, He replies by saying, I don't want to backbiting he has fallen into backbiting.
And so this leads me to the next thing. What is the definition of backbiting? Who knows what the definition is when someone says something bad about another person behind his or her back? Yes, I know you've touched part of the definition and many people they actually think
The backbiting means just what you said. And that's actually a misconception. The Prophet sallallahu sallam, he asked the Sahaba he said, Do you know what is backbiting? And the companions replied Allah and His Messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam know best. And upon that the prophets lie Selim said backbiting is to talk about your brother in a manner which he does not like to mention your brother in a manner that he doesn't like. So it's slightly different to what you said, in that, it means if the person doesn't like it, it's backbiting, whether it's done in front of him or behind his back, unless the person is giving advice or is trying to change and evil and we'll see some of
the exceptions to be given in a future episode in Sharla. So when sometimes when back biters are advised to give up such a bad habit, they reply, that they're only telling the truth. And this is exactly what some of the Sahaba said, is exactly what some of the Sahaba thought they asked the prophets I seldom, suppose there are actual faults in the one that I'm talking about. Now, what would you say to that grace?
That even if you if you said to the truth, yeah, I mean, for example, I say, Oh, he's so bad mannered. He speaks badly about, you know, other people he's This is, and maybe he is like that. Even if it's true, the person will still not like for you to mentioned that behind his back. Yes, because the prophet SAW Selim in this Hadith, he said, If what you say about your brother is true, then that is backbiting. Imagine that if you speak truly, truthfully about that person, then that is backbiting. But if what you say concerning him is not true for God. You have in fact, committed baton which is slander against him. So what's the difference between backbiting and slander?
backbiting is voice true? Sandra is what is not true? Yes. If you bite the person, it's true. If you slander him, it's something that's not true. But the common link between them is the person does not like what you're saying about him. And this is a common the prophets. I saw him explained here in this hadith that when you back by his mentioning the fault of the person, even though it's true, and slander is to mention something that is not true of him. Now, at the moment, No, we are not allowed one of the great scholars of the past. He said in his book, Alaska, and I quote, he says mentioning about your brother, something that he would dislike includes what concerns his body, his religious
practice, his worldly station, his physical appearance, his moral character, his wealth, his parents, his children, his spouse, his servant, his clothing, his activities, his smiles and frowns, and anything else that pertains to him. So you can imagine how dangerous it is and how easy it is for us to fall into this evil sin. It doesn't matter if you mentioned it in my mind, oh, he goes on to say explicitly by word, or implicitly by indication, or by gesture. This includes the likes of saying our law pardon us or somebody mentioned him he says all pardon us, so and so is coming, Oh Allah help us, God help us or saying our lucky pass safe. Even making dua to Allah in this manner,
has fallen, a person has fallen into backbiting and some better person sometimes they uttered these kind of phrases as I mentioned earlier, I don't want to back by him and this has become backbiting so with this inshallah we'll take a break and after that, after the break, we'll touch more upon this. For some Allahu senemo Baraka Alana Bina, Mohammed, Salah Malik
people need each other's needs colors, more than they need to drink.
Because even regarding what we drink and eat, we may not be able to figure out which is permissible and which
is not preserved in the books only. The Sierra Club is not preserved in the books, but on the heart in the hearts of men, and the hearts of people who have devoted their time to seeking
belief and trust
that none could take place without the knowledge of Allah
welcome back before
the break we were talking about backbiting and we said that backbiting is mentioning,
mentioning your brother in a way that he doesn't like as a prophet sallallahu wasallam said, Does that mean you can bet but someone was in front of them? So this is a very, very good question because some of the this is what many people think that backbiting actually means that you can't speak. You can you can't speak about someone that he doesn't like behind his back. But if I say in front of him, that's okay. This is incorrect. Because the prophets lie. Selim did not actually mention this in the Hadith, he said, What is Reba? Reba is or backbiting is to mention your brother in a way that he dislikes, whether that's in front or behind. In fact, this was some of the
scholars, when they trans, they gave the Tafseer of the verse way liquidly humans at a lumada will be to every homosassa and lumada. They said one of them, whom has an lumas or one of them is the one who back bites in front of the person and one of them is the one who back bites behind his back. And some scholars said Actually, it's one is a slander and one is a back biter. So this difference of opinion on who is Castro is not allowed to actually backbite someone in front of him, in other words, mentioned him in a way that he doesn't like, of course, this means in the presence of other people, but what can advise them these kind of things around if people are a symbol for slander,
slander, Taiwan is not allowed at all. You can't slander someone, because that is involved line.
Unless it is clear to everybody that it's a joke, and the person himself doesn't mind that he's being mentioned in this manner. Okay. So for example, if there's someone tall, very tall, extremely tall, and as a joke, someone says, Hey, shorty, okay, everybody knows he's not sure if he, okay, and the person himself doesn't mind it. In this case, it's fine to do that, because it's done in a joking manner. But if the person did mind, then of course it wouldn't be,
wouldn't be allowed. And we should look at the earth as well the custom of the people to judge that. Now backbiting is a very evil sin in Islam.
And we can take one example from the Sahaba when one Sahabi criticized a man who had been punished for committing adultery. So he'd been punished for committing a major sin, adultery and someone back with this person. Now the prophet SAW Selim was traveling, and he he passed by the carcass of a donkey. And he said, Where are those two people who spoke badly about the one who, who committed adultery, get down and eat from the flesh of this donkey? And they were surprised as to the other Salalah appropriate prophet of Allah Lysander who would eat this is a dead carcass dead, any carcass of a of a donkey? He said, what the two of you have recently done by defaming the owner of your
brother is far worse than eating from this Allahu Akbar. Look how the prophets lie. Selim defended the honor of a person who was punished for committing adultery, one of the major sins in Islam. But yet, the prophets Aslam still criticize them and call this backbiting. And he said this was worse than eating the flesh of a dead donkey. Now this is the case. What about backbiting? People who have not committed a major sin? What about backbiting? scholars are people who call to a fight for Islam. And this is a very common slip up. People say the Mujahideen and the Mujahideen are the coolest Islam or this the maulvis or this and this is all comes under backbiting. If he speaks about a
particular individual, now Muslims should not be backbiting as
Yes. Does that mean it's okay to speak about the group in general? No. Again, there's a bit more to that and we'll mention that inshallah. In a short while. Now Muslims should not back by others, but should be concerned with their own faults and if we find a fault with our brother, we should advise him and guide him to eliminate his faults rather than vilifying him. Okay, with this inshallah, let's have a look at some, some thoughts from people on the street and travel back who I think is a bad habit. It's about one two people talk about someone behind his back backbiting one or two persons or a group of people talking about someone behind his back is one of the bad words and can
lead to some further problems because it has the one that doesn't know does not know that they are talking about buy buy things, cause when, when a person talks about another person, and it doesn't give them a chance to defend themselves. When you talk about someone behind the back, you can see your own information about them. And you can you don't give them a
chance to defend themselves.
They're looking at what God gave others and they're not satisfied with
But God gave him some very interesting comments about backbiting. They're the Sahaba. Actually, they and the early Muslim scholars, they actually knew the reality of backbiting and his punishment, and they saw the weightiness of this, we're very careful about what they would utter. And in fact, even after that, don't be fearful of their tongues. We know the famous example of Abu Bakar, or the love and
grace when I say, I will work about the love and what comes into your mind about this Companion of the Messenger of Allah. will immediately you think of someone who's, you know, humble.
You know, on a very honest, try soft, soft, doesn't get angry. And this we can see throughout the narrations of the Sahaba. But guess what he did? He pointed to his tongue. And he said, this is the thing that caused me most destruction.
And this is very worrying for us. If the worker or the Allahu Allahu The one who is known for his honesty, he's tough, he is calm. And he says something like this, that this is the thing that destroyed me his tongue, then how about us how much more fearful should we be? In fact is narrated that Al Hassan al Masri Rahim Allah the Great Tabori, he died in the year 110 after he died at hustle and bustle he he was once back bitten, somebody came to him and said, Hey, you know, so and so is backbiting. So what did he do? He got some dates. He got some dates. And he sent them as a gift to the one who back button. And then he said, it has reached me. He wrote a letter, he said, it
has reached me that you have gifted me some of your good deeds. So I wanted to repay you for that. But I apologize, I'm unable to repay you in full. And this shows that he understood the reality of backbiting which is what? Who is backbiting really harming?
like talking about other? You mean? What who is it harming? If I back bit someone? If I talk about someone? Am I harming him? Or am I harming myself? Both? I think so. But what do you think? I think that's the person who actually says
says it's on the back writer, actually, yes. is the one who bad bites, he's actually harming himself most. Why is that good Ross? Because on the dev gentlemen who love to give up his good deeds, exactly. Is that automatic? Or does that mean gives him that's absolutely obligatory, that if a person if he backbite someone, then he has to give up his good deeds on the Day of Judgment, because there's no there have no giraffe on that day. There is no pound sterling, dollar, euro, whatever else currency you have, there's none of that in on the day of Judge In fact, the sterling the currency comes in the form of good deeds, and bad deeds, good deeds for you, bad deeds against you.
Now, if I also realized, I backwards, someone, may Allah protect us from that, then one has to give his his good deeds to that person. If he runs out of good deeds.
Then you take his sense, he takes his sense, he takes his sins This is how it will be judged. yamo famine, so we have to be very careful. And the hustle and bustle he recognized this very carefully. And that's why he said that if I were backed by anyone, it would be my parents. Why should he say that?
like brushing his teeth, he said, If I want you to bite someone, I would back bite my parents because his parents are most deserving of what God did exactly. Because it's his parents. He wants to give them gift them his good deeds because he knows the reality of backbiting. In fact, backlash seems like a gift. I backed by someone in fact, I'm doing it to vent my anger maybe. But in reality, what I'm doing is giving my good deeds to that person, may Allah protect us. So what about the person forgive the person? If the person forgives him, then insha Allah, Allah Subhana Allah, Allah will forgive him. And as long as he comes with all the other conditions of repentance, which we'll
talk about inshallah. Now if backbiting is such an evil sin, and the punishment is so great, then why do people do it? Why do people backward? But I think it's for chatting some people just back but just for having some chatting with each company. Yep. Other people are backbiting Hey, let's join a company that bad Yes, peer pressure, and this kind of thing. Yeah, good Ross. Any more ideas? I guess? If a person disliked somebody, then he would like other people dislike him also. So he mentioned bad things about them about them in front of other people. That their characters you know, yeah. So to character assassinate or something like this? Yeah. jealousy. For example, a person is
jealous. He feels jealous. He wants other people. He and maybe someone else is praising that person. Okay, a person is jealous of another, the other person is being praised. What do what does the person do? Let's back by Tim. Let's mention his faults. Why? So that the
other person doesn't praise him as much jealousy also can also say that his Eman is weak. Yes. And because of that weakness of a man, this is the root cause. He cannot control his stuff. Yes, he is when he has weak a man, weak taqwa, then a person is likely to speak thoughtlessly, without thinking, and maybe he can transgress against his own software. Likewise, as you said, he reduces his anger. He wants to reduce his anger vent out his anger by mentioning his faults. Also joining his companions in backbiting, as you mentioned very clearly, they're having bad thoughts about someone. This is another reason why a person could back by he has by thoughts about the one he's
backbiting. Sometimes actually, a person wants to absolve himself of bad characteristics. So for example, maybe he's a thief. And he mentioned, oh, so and so's a thief, why to absolve himself of this bad character from himself. Maybe he wants to raise himself up, he wants people to look up to him. So any kind of contemporary if he likes, he pushes him down. He mentioned his faults, and, and jealousy, for example, leads a person to do this mocking, joking belittling others, and so on and so forth. And we look at some of the cures, of backbiting in sha Allah in the next episode, but before we do that, let's just have a quick recap of what is backbiting. What is backbiting good to mention
your brother, sister behind the back row with something that is
in front of them over and over in front of them or behind their back? They crook a haka. democra mentioning your brother in a way that he dislikes. Okay, let's have some examples of that.
like that, when somebody is mentioning about another, another one.
That's very good point. That's a very good point. Some times we hear oh so and so is coming to visit.
This is like what the person is back. But you can also say, when someone's coming to serve, May Allah help us? Yes, May Allah help us Milla partners, all of this comes under backbiting. inshallah, in the next episode, we'll look at some of the cures of this disease and and also slander, and we should know that we should know these cures so that we can rid ourselves of this disease. masala was salam o Baraka Elena, Bina Mohammed, what Allah Allah He was a pH minor, Salaam Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh