Abdur Rahman ibn Yusuf Mangera – Will You be Missed When You Leave this World
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There is a big discussion nowadays about high value individuals.
It's become the trend to become a high value individual.
It's a new slogan, it's a new idea. It's a new trend, even
though the idea is very old. People have always just by their
very nature of being ambitious. And with high resolve and high
resolution, they wanted to always become high value people
productive people wanted to always be high value people.
However, today, everybody wants to be a high value person just for
the sake of being a high value person. And high value today can
actually refer to just being somebody who just blows a lot of
air on online, no substance. But because people have time to waste
or looking for time to waste, this guy just gives them time to waste,
there's nothing of substance, nothing, you're not going to make
more money by listening to him.
You're gonna make him money by listening to in fact, well, you're
not gonna make any money. Listen, it's just a good pastime, like a
lot of the reels that we go through. We can spend half an hour
an hour just going through reels, and going through tic TOCs. And
all the rest of it, you actually don't get anything. In fact, I
think you we mess our brains up. I really think because how can a
person
focus on a 30 minute content or an a minute content? And then in the
next 30 seconds, focus on next 30 Min, or 32nd? Or 52nd content or a
minute content? And do that for half an hour? In half an hour?
You've seen 30 to 100 Different reels of different ideas?
That is just not natural. I don't think anybody in history, right?
Would you ever sit with two people with another person and talk about
100 different things in half an hour?
It's not natural, nobody would ever do that.
You would never speak about 100 different topics in an hour.
Right? It's just silly. What's the point of that? What are you even
discussing, but we go through 100 topics
in half an hour to one hour just watching stuff? What do you retain
absolutely nothing, maybe one thing from there, it is just an
absolute waste of time. You know, you should start an online
business. In the times that we take to waste time on these
things. You could do a side business, if you got if you if
you've got something to offer, you could consult if you've got
something to sell, you can sell, you can order stuff put in an
Amazon print eBay, get your own website, you can actually be
making money if nothing else.
I mean, I don't want to say do test free because that's not very
attractive. But that's what we should be doing. But what I'm
saying is I think this is really, really harmful. I think this is
really really harmful. You just can't it's just not natural. To go
through so many things. I just wonder what it does to the brain.
But anyway, everybody wants to become a high value individual
with actually nothing that's that's the thing. So what is a
real high value because Allah subhanho wa Taala has always
valued high individual, high valued individuals. And he's made
a whole paradise for them. He's made a whole hereafter for them.
So what exactly is a high value, high valued individual in the
sight of Allah subhanaw taala. So firstly, the highest valued
individual is the one who Allah subhanaw taala loves and only
Allah can love you if you love Allah subhanho wa Taala Allah will
love it. Allah loves us because we're His creation, but to get
that special love then we need to love him. Otherwise Allah loves
all human beings. He wouldn't have created us for nothing.
So Allah loves human beings however, we need to love Allah
subhanaw taala and Allah says in the Quran, well, Adina Ermanno
Asha dog Bonilla, that those who believe in Allah, they are the
most intense in their love for Allah.
Those who believe who call themselves believers who come for
Friday prayers, they are most intense in their love for Allah
subhanho wa taala.
Number two, we don't live just between us and Allah. There are a
lot of other elements and factors in the world that we have to deal
with. That means family members, at least we have parents or had
parents.
And then we have neighbors, we have other people in the community
and society, cousins and relatives, people we deal with, we
transact with
and we live with overall in society. So Allah wants us to
fulfill respond high valued individual is the one that people
respect because they
Good citizens, good social beings, good individuals, good neighbors,
good cousins, good sons, good brothers, good parents, these are
high vet, they, they fulfill the obligations of those around them.
They see a neighbor who's struggling bringing their shopping
and struggling with trying to do something with their car. So
rather than just watch from the window, and think I'm really cozy
inside the house, let me go and just see if there's something I
can help with. Even just make them feel good that there's somebody
having because you know, and you're trying to do some work
yourself. And somebody even just gives you an idea. It just makes
us human beings.
Your, your heart wells up, right with gratitude for this person.
Just about making people feel good, somebody allows you to cross
in front of them,
or overtake you. And if if you let somebody overtake you, if you let
somebody in, and then they just zoom off, you're like, Okay, I did
my part. But if they thank you by blinking the by by putting on
their blinkers, don't you feel better that there are good people
in the worlds? That sounds like so small, right? It sounds so small,
but I really I thought about it, I let somebody in inside, he didn't
do anything he just carried on another person he came in, and he
blinked, he put his on his blinkers. And I was like,
mashallah that guy appreciate there's a human in there.
It just makes the difference. SubhanAllah. So I started doing it
as well. Because when you see it makes the difference to you, you
we should be doing it as well. Just thanking somebody else,
that's a high valued individual, those little moments of putting
happiness in somebody's hearts. That's really amazing, because
Allah loves it when we are good to his creation. So this isn't just
something that we're never going to see that guy in that car again,
ever. It wasn't a motorway, we never gonna see that guy. Again.
It's not about that. It's about just raising the happiness of
people overall, the joy, right? The experience of people overall,
that is amazing.
So he is a person who fulfills
the responsibilities of those people around him, that whether
that be his family members, parents, children, etc. Brothers
and sisters, employees or employer, colleagues, at school
colleagues at work. And, of course, the spouse, the spouse,
very important.
They can rely on him, and I get the question to ask is, are you
going to be missed?
When we leave this world, are we going to be missed?
Or is it going to be good returns? That's a really amazing, very
simple, straightforward way of figuring out whether we are being
high valued individuals or not. We're still alive, we can change
it all. Right.
When I die, are people going to miss me?
Allahu Akbar, what a thought that is what a thought that is. Number
three, a high valued individual is committed to principles.
They're very, they have principles, they committed to
principles. That's why what is very important nowadays, right? We
struggle in this time of individualism in this time, where
everybody thinks on their own, including parents and children is
very difficult to find parents whose children still think alike.
them. They're on the same wavelength.
It used to be the case pretty much throughout history, you'd it would
be an exception, if you want children carried on the parents,
vocations, businesses, farming, it was done deal. That's what it was.
Nowadays, I know people with businesses and their children
don't want to carry on that business. They having to sell it.
Unless it's a business, we just sit and raking money, no efforts.
Right? It's a business of effort. They don't want to they want to do
their own. Right, which sometimes fine, but I'm just saying you get
very few parents and children who actually even think like,
very few.
What we need to do is we The reason is that if we have
principles, and we've been able to really put down the importance of
those principles in our home, and get our children to bind to those
principles, then Subhanallah then everybody's gonna have principles.
So for example,
if our child does something off track, we say you can't do this.
He says what my friends are doing is he you can't do that because
you're a Han.
Right if you're hot, right? You can't do this because you're
Islam?
Because your surname is Islam.
Any other surnames here, a kanji? Is that a surname here? Right? You
can't do this because you are a Patel, you're an accordion, you
know, I'm saying there has to be this.
This family pride that we don't do this kind of stuff. When that
child goes out there, he sees others doing this. But you know,
I'm supposed to be different, I don't do this cancer, we got
principles.
Have we ever even thought about giving principles to our family,
like as a principle, we don't do this kind of stuff, you can say we
don't do is because we're Muslim.
You could do that.
Use whatever you want, as long as you don't make them show off and
think they're superior to everybody and look down upon
everybody else. It's about principles. So when a child thinks
that, it's not just about me, I am holding the weight of a whole
tribe or whole community or a whole family, I can't go against
that. It gives you a lot more resilience,
and strength. So, commitment to principles, I'm having to rush
this, because we have very few minutes to do this. Number four,
if you're a person of principles, you will defend your correct and
valid interests, you won't be just free for all or whatever it is,
move with the tide, go with the trend, change every day, a taboo
that you had 10 years ago, now it's okay.
That's the crazy modern world. We need principles, right. And for
that, you have to defend your interest, defend things that are
important, if you don't have principles, you got nothing to
defend,
except your so called freedom.
Right. So what's important is to understand
you have principles, you have to be able to defend your principle
that means one of our biggest our biggest principle is Islam, and
then is humanity.
Islam and then humanity.
And that's what we see is a problem today, based on what's
going on in Palestine. And Gaza. People don't have principles have
no interest in proper humanity, it's just biased support of one
group of people over the other. There's no humanity here.
Your religion has to be defended.
And that means by fulfilling your demand and making sure that you're
a good representative that we are representing it well, your God,
your profit, your family, and all your other values, they have to be
defended.
In in Arabic, they call it the euro.
We call it zero in order to record it Herot. If you've heard of that
idea, zero means a sense of protective jealousy, protective
envy.
For your principles, you see that your family members are some idea
that you really believe to be a good idea is being criticized, is
being ridiculed, or is being downtrodden or something like
that, you stand up for that principle, because you have a
sense of justice, you have a sense of honesty and truth. And you have
a sense of pride in good principles.
That's really what the true value person if we're just somebody
who's just going to be bowled over all the time, and just goes with
the trend, whatever it is, has no idea of what their ultimate
ambition is goal or goal is or they do have one but it's just the
basic idea. For example, let's just say there's somebody in a
country that wants to come to the UK Allah bless Allah Tala make it
easy for these, you know, people are trying to get in, they just
want to get to London.
In fact, they don't even know it's England, they just call the whole
country London.
Like where do you want to go in London? I don't care just drop me
on any coasts. You know, just imagine you know, everyone from
India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Gambia, whatever it is, they just
want to get here Subhanallah they don't care where just London like
London just gives me the optimism. Drop me anywhere on a rooftop
somewhere. I don't care.
I just need to get across this channel or whatever it is.
But they put a lot of effort though. We're not even putting
effort. We just have this hazy idea of Jana.
When awaring Jana we want to be you don't know how to get to Jana.
We've got a ticket and that's it but we don't know the way to get
there yet.
At least these guys they're trying. They're paying people to
get them across or whatever it is, you know, they're doing that Allah
Allah protect them they Subhanallah but we're not even
trying.
We just think it's going to happen.
So protecting one's family and his value in names.
Number, The next point
is a high value person cannot be a stingy person.
That's not human being. Humans are social creatures. Just tell me Is
there anybody here who who's know somebody that is stingy, but likes
him because he's stingy.
You know, they're stingy. Well, like, yeah, good. You're stingy.
Nobody likes a stingy person.
You know, you go to eat with your friends to a restaurant, and you
have a meal. And then towards the end, you just slip out to go and
wash your hands. Hey, brothers, I need to go and wash out my hands.
So then somebody else pays. I'm not giving ideas.
Right.
Everybody gives your children Ed, you know, ABS, right in certain
cultures, people,
relatives, and they give children some gifts or II they call it ed.
So your children are receiving, but you don't give to anybody.
Why? Because brother it's a bitter. The Prophet Salas never
gave ed the why his sons taking it. What are your children taking
it?
Just stinginess. You can't be stingy. Generosity is what makes
you a leader. Subhan Allah think about it. Generosity gets you
value.
Generosity is Allah. Allah is generosity, the Prophet sallallahu
Sallam archetype of generosity, Allahu Akbar, how much generous he
was. Allah make us some of us are just born stingy by nature, right?
We have to work against that. And just start, that's high value.
People will respect you for that generous generosity. And there's a
lot of others, but I'll just leave us with the last one, which is
avoiding jealousy and anger.
Avoiding jealousy and anger, if you're, they say there's two.
Among the many successful companies in the world, there are
two that are like competition. So one of the experts says that he's
dealt with both of these companies at this one company wakes up every
morning thinking how can I beat the other company?
The other company gets up in the morning. And their philosophy is
how can I just be the best? I don't care about anybody else.
How can I just be the best, and that company usually does better.
They just try and be proud of their own product is not
comparison is just I want to be the best. I just want to be the
best. There's somebody he
he's got a marriage, a wedding in the family.
He's got multiple quotes for caterers.
And differences, five to 10 pounds. He doesn't want to go with
the cheaper ones way.
He knows that there's impossible for them to give him good food
with that kind of money.
And his below his pride below his status, he thinks not to show off
that he is going to feed people hit or miss food. Whereas the
others who are charging more, they're guaranteed their food is
known. For example, it's about getting the best for the right
reason.
People in their wedding, weddings will have all of these other stuff
like expensive flowers and so on and the food is
just feed somebody good food, that's halal.
Right, all the other stuff, just forget that put the money where it
really should be.
Because feeding people is a sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu sallam.
In fact, he said up to a moratorium, feed people,
feed people will steal our ham and be good to your relatives. So when
you're feeding somebody, don't ever skimp on that. It's the only
place we actually allow to be extravagant. You actually allow it
to be extravagant for your guests, just to make them feel happy not
to show off. The point of a lecture is to encourage people to
act to get further an inspiration and encouragement, persuasion. The
next step is to actually start learning seriously to read books
to take on a subject of Islam and to understand all the subjects of
Islam at least at the basic level, so that we can become more aware
of what our Dean wants from us. And that's why we started Rayyan
courses so that you can actually take organize lectures on demand
whenever you have free time, especially for example, the
Islamic essentials course that we have on the Islamic essentials
certificate which you take 20 Short modules and at the end of
that inshallah you will have gotten the basics of most of the
most important topics in
Islam and you'll feel a lot more confident you don't have to leave
lectures behind you can continue to live you know to listen to
lectures but you need to have this more sustained study as well as
local law here in salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato