Abdur Rahman ibn Yusuf Mangera – Q&A Learning to Control One’s Anger
AI: Summary ©
The speaker discusses the importance of identifying and addressing anger in a positive way. They suggest identifying the root cause of anger and making notes about it. They also advise people to prepare ahead of potential triggers and avoid harming themselves or others.
AI: Summary ©
ABA spoke about blameworthy trades, and mine is anger, I find
it very hard to control my anger and just a couple of seconds, or
in just a couple of seconds or minutes, I'll say so many things,
which I'll regret, what can I do to control it? Basically, there
are courses and there is there, there is guidance, even online on
anger management. One is a spiritual issue. The other one is
a practical issue or therapy or guidance to try to stop.
I would just say a few things right. Now one of the things that
I would say is that a lot of the time going off like that on anger
is that many people get angry, but the way they respond is different.
So I think what's happened is that we've considered it to be fair
game to respond that way and say so many things. And we've become
so probably habituated to it, we've done it so many times that
it's all hardwired now that every time we get angry, we're going to
say all of these things. So we have to unravel that we have to
change that. So let us try to identify first, where we do this
most, or who we do it most with, there are always going to be some
trigger, trigger people trigger situation, which they will trigger
this thing off. So let us start to sit down and think for ourselves,
maybe jot it down, make some notes that it's with the certain people,
whether that be with our own parent, our own children, our own
spouses, or whoever it is, right. Or it's when I'm in a certain
situation, or it's when I'm hungry, for example, because low
blood sugar can create that kind of a symptom as well. Or things
like that, when I'm agitated, if we can identify when we do it,
then we can inshallah hope to be more prepared them because when
I've identified these with this person, so if I'm going to go
there, and I know it could generally happen, I'm going to be
more careful at this time, I will not do so.
So Inshallah, if you can understand the triggers that will
that will help. And then of course, we keep asking Allah
subhanaw taala for refuge from anger, from exposing the anger
from expressing that anger. And every time we do at the end of the
day, we look back and think why we did that. And then try to again,
analyze the situation. And Sharla slowly, slowly, if we just try to
act more positive in the world, because anger comes from
arrogance. Anger comes from a feeling of
entitlement. Anger comes from so many different narcissism it can
come from so he did so if we can understand the root cause of our
anger, is it because I just feel everybody else is below me. They
must do things in the way I want them to do things. I don't have
any patience. Maybe I'm arrogant. I can't take when somebody else
has something better than I have. Or somebody gets think about these
things. And if you can, it's all about identifying now
Alhamdulillah The first thing is that if somebody is asking this
question, it means that there's a concern. Now it's just about going
deeper and finding out what are these triggers? What are these
problems? Where does it come from? And keep making dua to Allah
Allah, how many are all the becoming a mineral hardab You can
say, or read the caramel catecholamine allay those who
control their anger. And try to just prepare ahead Allah Khomeini
are all the bigger man a ship party when the 40 or so good luck
luck is very good, which basically means Oh Allah, I seek your refuge
from disputation from hypocrisy and from bad character. Anger is a
trigger it is basically an ingredient of bad character. So we
ask Allah for Tofik