Abdur Rahman ibn Yusuf Mangera – Don’t Be Harsh Benefits of Gentleness

Abdur Rahman ibn Yusuf Mangera
AI: Summary ©
The complexities of Islam and the use ofangelery and force in achieving productivity and engagement with people are emphasized. The importance of engagement and empathy is emphasized, as it is essential for personal success. The use ofangelery and force in achieving engagement and empathy is emphasized, and the need for engagement with people and lakaorn is emphasized. The challenges faced by individuals and their families are also discussed, including the misunderstandings of the Prophet sallContinou's actions and behavior, and the importance of forgiveness and helping others.
AI: Transcript ©
00:00:00 --> 00:00:04

Bismillah al Rahman al Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi wa salatu salam or

00:00:04 --> 00:00:08

others say you will mousseline or either early he was sorry he was

00:00:08 --> 00:00:13

seldom at the Sleeman Kathira laomi. Dean Emeritus called Allah

00:00:13 --> 00:00:16

terracotta Allah for the Quran emoji they will for cloning Hamid

00:00:16 --> 00:00:21

Febi Marathi min Allah Healin della whom well can the fourth one

00:00:21 --> 00:00:25

valley evil Pearl be done for Doom in Holic? So the color Halloween,

00:00:27 --> 00:00:32

sha Allah in our discussion today, it will be about a really simple

00:00:32 --> 00:00:38

topic of gentleness. We're seeing with everything that's going on.

00:00:38 --> 00:00:39

There's a

00:00:40 --> 00:00:46

lot of high blood pressure, maybe a lot of tension, a lot of stress,

00:00:46 --> 00:00:47

a lot of frustration.

00:00:48 --> 00:00:52

And generally, when these things happen, then some innate

00:00:53 --> 00:00:56

characteristics that we have negative characteristics, they

00:00:56 --> 00:01:01

come to the fore, they give rise, and they bubble up to the surface.

00:01:02 --> 00:01:06

Sometimes there's even an explosion of these things. So each

00:01:06 --> 00:01:11

of us challenged with different things. Some people with maybe a

00:01:11 --> 00:01:15

bit of anger, some people would miserliness, some people with

00:01:15 --> 00:01:20

laziness. Some people would coward cowardice, some people, some

00:01:20 --> 00:01:21

people will overzealousness

00:01:23 --> 00:01:25

they just want to be doing something all the time, even if

00:01:25 --> 00:01:32

it's wrong. So each of us has some challenges in a stressful

00:01:32 --> 00:01:36

situation, in a situation of stress and difficulty and

00:01:36 --> 00:01:39

challenge. Humans, they

00:01:41 --> 00:01:41

vent

00:01:42 --> 00:01:46

in these situations, and sometimes the blameworthy characteristics

00:01:46 --> 00:01:50

that come to the fore. So with the lockdown and everything that's

00:01:50 --> 00:01:53

going on, there's a lot of people who are having massive problems

00:01:53 --> 00:01:58

with, especially their close ones, which we've discussed earlier. So

00:01:58 --> 00:02:03

today we want to speak just about risk, which is an important

00:02:05 --> 00:02:08

characteristic in Islam. If you look at the Hadith books,

00:02:09 --> 00:02:13

there's chapters about this Moscato Masabi. Many of the other

00:02:13 --> 00:02:17

books it's about Rif. And the Prophet said allah sallallahu

00:02:17 --> 00:02:22

alayhi wa sallam has actually made very specific statements about it

00:02:22 --> 00:02:26

has provided specific advice and guidance about gentleness

00:02:27 --> 00:02:32

is gentleness. Essentially the opposite of harshness, the

00:02:32 --> 00:02:37

opposite of harshness and roughness, gentleness, so

00:02:37 --> 00:02:42

gentleness. That's why the first verse that I quoted, verse 159,

00:02:44 --> 00:02:44

of

00:02:47 --> 00:02:50

the third chapter of the Quran, Allah subhanho wa Taala says Febi

00:02:50 --> 00:02:53

Marathi min Allah He lynnderella home it's because of Allah's

00:02:53 --> 00:02:58

mercy, Rama. So what I'm talking about is riff which is associated

00:02:58 --> 00:03:03

with Rama. Rama has to be given to us, for us to have gentleness.

00:03:04 --> 00:03:07

A person who basks in the Mercy of Allah subhanaw taala should have

00:03:07 --> 00:03:08

gentleness.

00:03:09 --> 00:03:13

If you don't have gentleness, maybe we don't have the mercy or

00:03:13 --> 00:03:14

sufficient mercy.

00:03:15 --> 00:03:18

So that's where Allah subhanaw taala says Furby ma rahmati min

00:03:18 --> 00:03:20

Allah He lynnderella home

00:03:21 --> 00:03:26

because of the Mercy of Allah, the Rama of Allah that lynnderella

00:03:26 --> 00:03:29

home. Again, the same concept when something is laying it means it's

00:03:29 --> 00:03:33

soft. So Linda, that you became soft, gentle, what does he mean by

00:03:33 --> 00:03:35

soft that people walk over? You know?

00:03:37 --> 00:03:40

It speaking, if you look at this verse, Then Allah subhanaw taala

00:03:40 --> 00:03:41

says,

00:03:42 --> 00:03:45

well, oh, couldn't the father than valley the local? Had you been

00:03:45 --> 00:03:48

harsh and hard hearted?

00:03:49 --> 00:03:52

They would have scurried away from you.

00:03:53 --> 00:03:56

They would have escaped from you, they wouldn't stay around you.

00:03:57 --> 00:03:59

Now, one of the things that we have in our deen which is very

00:03:59 --> 00:04:01

important for us is that the Prophet salallahu alayhi salam

00:04:01 --> 00:04:04

worked on an initial group of people that would die for him.

00:04:06 --> 00:04:08

The amount of respect that they had for him, they wouldn't I mean,

00:04:08 --> 00:04:11

as the Hadith mentions that it wouldn't allow, you know, not even

00:04:12 --> 00:04:17

spittle to touch the ground, from the province of saliva to touch

00:04:17 --> 00:04:22

the ground. That's how mad in love they were. Now, would that have

00:04:22 --> 00:04:24

been the case had the province of loathsome been different? Had he

00:04:24 --> 00:04:26

been harsh? They wouldn't have been. So

00:04:27 --> 00:04:31

this is not to say that harsh people cannot have people around

00:04:31 --> 00:04:34

them that they control. But there's a different dynamic there.

00:04:34 --> 00:04:38

There's no love. There is done out of fear. Or it's because you're

00:04:38 --> 00:04:42

going to get payment or because you're gonna get a position. It's

00:04:42 --> 00:04:44

for exterior reasons.

00:04:45 --> 00:04:48

It's not the same thing. They're saying that one of the biggest

00:04:49 --> 00:04:54

characteristics that a leader can provide is empathy is caring for

00:04:54 --> 00:04:57

those under them, then those people want to give their life for

00:04:57 --> 00:04:59

this person. Then they'll do it for the right reason.

00:05:00 --> 00:05:04

You'll be more productive, you'll you'll have less burden, you'll

00:05:04 --> 00:05:07

have less stress. Because when people take the mission

00:05:07 --> 00:05:12

themselves, take up the job themselves, take up the idea, and

00:05:12 --> 00:05:17

the dream. And the purpose, the objective themselves, because they

00:05:17 --> 00:05:21

believe in you as the leader, because they believe in you, as

00:05:21 --> 00:05:24

somebody who's lovable, who's gentle, who's working for the

00:05:24 --> 00:05:27

right reason, then you're going to have a lot more productivity than

00:05:27 --> 00:05:32

having to drive people like an animal herd, for instance. So

00:05:32 --> 00:05:33

that's why

00:05:34 --> 00:05:37

Allah subhanaw taala makes that statement. And this statement is

00:05:37 --> 00:05:38

made in the

00:05:39 --> 00:05:43

in a position of you can say leadership almost to some degree,

00:05:43 --> 00:05:46

many of you will be thinking, well, we're not really leaders,

00:05:46 --> 00:05:50

you know, we we are not a minister, we are not an MP, we are

00:05:50 --> 00:05:54

not a senator, we're not the Prime Minister, we're not a council

00:05:54 --> 00:05:58

member, we're not a counselor, you know, we're not even at the head

00:05:58 --> 00:06:01

of an organization. Well, you may not be, but believe me, everybody

00:06:01 --> 00:06:04

has some kind of responsibility under them, whether that's, you're

00:06:04 --> 00:06:07

just the parents, you are just at the home, you're the husband,

00:06:07 --> 00:06:08

you're the wife,

00:06:09 --> 00:06:14

you know, you work with others. And that's leadership, in some

00:06:14 --> 00:06:16

sense. And even if it's not leadership, this is not

00:06:16 --> 00:06:19

necessarily just about leadership. This is just about interactions,

00:06:19 --> 00:06:24

human interaction with people around us. That's why one of one

00:06:24 --> 00:06:27

of my, you know, one of the scholars who I really have a high

00:06:27 --> 00:06:31

regard for, I've benefited hugely from the Kitab Zuza Yemeni scholar

00:06:31 --> 00:06:35

whose name was Imam Abdullah, ignore either we had done, I've

00:06:35 --> 00:06:38

been totally amazed and really, really benefited from some of his

00:06:38 --> 00:06:42

books that have been published both in Urdu and many of them have

00:06:42 --> 00:06:46

been translated into English. So this is from one of his books, he

00:06:46 --> 00:06:50

talks about gentleness, he says that know that gentleness is

00:06:50 --> 00:06:51

required in all things.

00:06:53 --> 00:06:57

It is encouraged and approved off in both Sharia and both by reason.

00:06:58 --> 00:07:01

How would you prove it through reason? Well, you would probably

00:07:01 --> 00:07:04

say that if you didn't, you know, you've probably dealt with many,

00:07:04 --> 00:07:06

many people in our life. You know, yesterday, I was speaking to

00:07:06 --> 00:07:09

somebody. And the whole discussion was the wife was complaining about

00:07:09 --> 00:07:12

the husband being very stingy and so on. So I was discussing as I

00:07:12 --> 00:07:17

asked her husband, you know, um, have you seen anybody who's stingy

00:07:17 --> 00:07:20

among your friends? And says, Yes, I said, would you want to travel

00:07:20 --> 00:07:23

with them? Would you want to be with them, rather than somebody

00:07:23 --> 00:07:27

who's a bit more generous? So you said no, obviously. So I said,

00:07:27 --> 00:07:29

Well, it's the same kind of thing. You know, you wouldn't like in

00:07:29 --> 00:07:32

others. So you shouldn't make it for yourself either. But we can't

00:07:32 --> 00:07:35

see it in ourselves as much we can see it in others. So

00:07:37 --> 00:07:39

we see it in reason as well. Have you dealt with people who are

00:07:39 --> 00:07:44

harsh? And have you dealt with people who are gentle? Right? You

00:07:44 --> 00:07:48

know, so, if the gentle person can get the same job done as the harsh

00:07:48 --> 00:07:52

person, sometimes you do need harshness? Right. Sometimes its

00:07:52 --> 00:07:55

harshness is not without its benefits entirely. There are

00:07:55 --> 00:07:58

benefits, but the dominant state should be gentleness. So that's

00:07:58 --> 00:08:00

why he's saying that this is approved in both the Sharia and

00:08:00 --> 00:08:03

reason is not just something Sharia although that would be

00:08:03 --> 00:08:06

sufficient for us. But it's only reason if you think about it, just

00:08:06 --> 00:08:09

logically, it's the same thing. Things can be achieved through

00:08:09 --> 00:08:13

gentleness that cannot even remotely be done through severity

00:08:13 --> 00:08:16

and force. There are some times you will get things out of

00:08:16 --> 00:08:19

gentleness that you cannot get out of severity and force.

00:08:20 --> 00:08:24

I remember a fable that I read I know it's a it's just the fable,

00:08:24 --> 00:08:27

Aesop's Fables. I can't remember what it was when I was younger.

00:08:27 --> 00:08:29

And, you know, when you're young and you read the stories, I mean,

00:08:29 --> 00:08:33

something that left an impression he said that the wind and the sun,

00:08:33 --> 00:08:37

they had an argument they had a debate, who is stronger

00:08:37 --> 00:08:40

Subhanallah I can't even believe that I'm mentioning this probably

00:08:40 --> 00:08:44

never mentioned the story before. So the wind and the sun they had

00:08:44 --> 00:08:49

an argument they had a debate as to who is stronger. So they're

00:08:49 --> 00:08:53

arguing, arguing and then okay, I think somebody made a, somebody

00:08:53 --> 00:08:54

made up a

00:08:55 --> 00:08:58

competition for them that okay, if you're able to get this guy

00:08:58 --> 00:09:03

outside, who's got his coat on, and the shawl all wrapped up,

00:09:03 --> 00:09:07

whoever can get him to take his shirt off, blow his shirt off, or

00:09:07 --> 00:09:11

whatever it is, then they win. They are the mightiest and they're

00:09:11 --> 00:09:15

the strongest. So the wind starts and starts blowing gusts of wind

00:09:15 --> 00:09:19

and it is buttoning himself up and tightening. So wrapping himself up

00:09:19 --> 00:09:22

even stronger, and you know, even harder and making sure that he's

00:09:22 --> 00:09:26

holding on for dear life. So the wind tried and tried and tried and

00:09:26 --> 00:09:28

time was up, it couldn't do anything.

00:09:30 --> 00:09:34

Now the son just started smiling. And it was a picture book with the

00:09:34 --> 00:09:35

same smiling.

00:09:36 --> 00:09:41

So you know, the son is smiling and suddenly the guy starts

00:09:41 --> 00:09:45

feeling hot, and he just starts taking his shirt off them took his

00:09:45 --> 00:09:50

coat off. And they're the sunroom. So, I mean, this is, I guess to

00:09:50 --> 00:09:54

teach children that softness and gentleness. It's an interesting

00:09:54 --> 00:09:57

story. Don't think It's haram to say these stories, you know, but

00:09:57 --> 00:09:59

anyway, there you go. So that's true.

00:10:00 --> 00:10:03

gentleness is the attribute of the wise in that's really interesting.

00:10:03 --> 00:10:07

I never prepared this story. It is a story I read years and years

00:10:07 --> 00:10:12

I've never mentioned it again in over 25 years, I would say play 30

00:10:12 --> 00:10:16

years, probably 30 years I've never mentioned this story. And

00:10:16 --> 00:10:19

today popped into the mind. Where does that come from?

00:10:20 --> 00:10:22

That's an interesting idea. You know, nobody's been able to

00:10:22 --> 00:10:24

understand where things just come into your mind.

00:10:25 --> 00:10:29

You know, Allah subhanaw taala. In sha Allah, it's a good thing and

00:10:29 --> 00:10:33

it's not the shaytaan. Gentleness is the attributes of the wise and

00:10:33 --> 00:10:37

the compassionate among those servants of Allah, whom he has

00:10:37 --> 00:10:41

selected. And if you look at it, the Prophet salallahu Salam is our

00:10:41 --> 00:10:44

biggest exemplar, our greatest exemplar, and the incredible

00:10:44 --> 00:10:47

amount of gentleness that he expressed.

00:10:48 --> 00:10:52

And then many others after him. This is what made a leader. This

00:10:52 --> 00:10:55

is what made them the way they were that they could be loved.

00:10:55 --> 00:10:58

What you can get out of love by being a leader is much more than

00:10:58 --> 00:11:02

you can get out of harshness by being a leader. God the Exalted

00:11:02 --> 00:11:04

describe this Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam the master of

00:11:04 --> 00:11:08

mankind, many blessings and peace be upon him. And you said, it was

00:11:08 --> 00:11:12

by the mercy of God that you were lenient with them, for had you

00:11:12 --> 00:11:14

been stern and costs

00:11:15 --> 00:11:19

of hearts, they would have dispersed from around you. This is

00:11:19 --> 00:11:21

the verse that I read earlier. Then Allah subhanho wa Taala also

00:11:21 --> 00:11:26

says in chapter seven, verse 199, keep to forgiveness.

00:11:28 --> 00:11:32

enjoin kindness and turn away from the ignorant ones. So keep to

00:11:32 --> 00:11:36

forgiveness. keep forgiving, don't be so harsh that you never forget,

00:11:36 --> 00:11:36

forgive

00:11:39 --> 00:11:43

Allah. And then Allah subhanaw taala says in chapter 25, verse

00:11:43 --> 00:11:47

63, and the servants of the all merciful, they who walk upon the

00:11:47 --> 00:11:51

earth gently Why are you bad? Oh Rockman in living in a yam shoo

00:11:51 --> 00:11:55

and I'll have the whole home. These are various different

00:11:55 --> 00:12:00

expressions of gentleness of mercy, expressions, home, lien,

00:12:00 --> 00:12:03

all of these words, Forgiveness comes from there as well. It's a

00:12:03 --> 00:12:07

it's a big idea. Gentleness is going to provide many different

00:12:07 --> 00:12:09

manifestations it's going to manifest in different ways, in

00:12:09 --> 00:12:15

softness in gentleness, in in forgiveness, in easygoing nature.

00:12:15 --> 00:12:18

These are the kinds of characteristics that people enjoy

00:12:18 --> 00:12:22

anyway. So and the servants of the old merciful are they who walk

00:12:22 --> 00:12:26

upon the earth gently and when the ignorant ones address them, they

00:12:26 --> 00:12:30

say peace, weather hot Obama, Jae Hee Luna, Carlos Salama,

00:12:31 --> 00:12:34

they say peace they deal with it in a peaceful manner. That's

00:12:34 --> 00:12:35

another way to look at this.

00:12:37 --> 00:12:40

The Messenger of Allah may Allah bless him and give him peace said

00:12:42 --> 00:12:45

Allah is gentle and loves gentleness in all things.

00:12:46 --> 00:12:47

When you hippo RIF

00:12:50 --> 00:12:53

Allah subhanho wa Taala is gentle and he loves gentleness and

00:12:53 --> 00:12:57

everything. And he also said gentleness never enters anything

00:12:57 --> 00:13:01

without embellishing it. And it is never taken out of anything

00:13:01 --> 00:13:04

without disgracing it. Essentially, gentleness is an

00:13:04 --> 00:13:08

ingredient. It's a quality which if it's in something, it will

00:13:08 --> 00:13:12

embellish it it will just make it much more adorned and beautiful.

00:13:13 --> 00:13:16

And if it's taken out of something, if gentleness is taken

00:13:16 --> 00:13:21

out of something, then it will disgrace it disfigure it make it

00:13:21 --> 00:13:25

ugly, what exactly is gentleness that gentleness

00:13:27 --> 00:13:31

is to manage the you know, this is the way we can check for ourselves

00:13:31 --> 00:13:34

how gentleness is whether we have gentleness, gentleness is to

00:13:34 --> 00:13:36

manage things with subtlety

00:13:37 --> 00:13:41

with more tact rather than with a sledgehammer,

00:13:42 --> 00:13:43

you know, some of us

00:13:44 --> 00:13:45

by FITARA

00:13:47 --> 00:13:50

they take sledgehammers when they want to deal with something, they

00:13:50 --> 00:13:53

know who they are. Like I can I can

00:13:55 --> 00:13:59

simplify sympathize with this. I can understand this because I

00:13:59 --> 00:14:03

probably was something like this. Right? When they are dealing with

00:14:03 --> 00:14:06

something they deal with it in the most toughest of ways or hardest

00:14:06 --> 00:14:09

of ways or with a sledgehammer as they say, you know with the

00:14:09 --> 00:14:15

symbolic metaphorical Sledgehammer is so, no, you need to be more

00:14:15 --> 00:14:19

specific. Those even when they need to tap things, they have very

00:14:19 --> 00:14:23

specific hammers in which they tap different parts to get it right.

00:14:24 --> 00:14:27

Not with a big sledgehammer, you'll just destroy the thing. So

00:14:27 --> 00:14:30

that's what he's saying. You have to manage things with subtlety

00:14:30 --> 00:14:36

with ease with dignity, with dignity, and with deliberation.

00:14:36 --> 00:14:38

You've carefully planned it.

00:14:39 --> 00:14:42

Alright, a shot of the Allahu Anhu said that the Prophet sallallahu

00:14:42 --> 00:14:46

alayhi wa sallam was never given a choice between two things.

00:14:47 --> 00:14:48

But

00:14:49 --> 00:14:52

that he always chose the easier one as long as he was not sinful.

00:14:53 --> 00:14:56

So we do have a criteria. It's not about choosing the sin. The

00:14:56 --> 00:14:58

easiest thing and the people mentioned this hadith sometimes

00:14:58 --> 00:14:59

they choose the easiest one even though

00:15:00 --> 00:15:03

is a bit of a violation of Allah's rights there. No, as long as

00:15:03 --> 00:15:06

that's not the case. But when it was sinful he was the remotest of

00:15:06 --> 00:15:08

people from it, he would not touch it.

00:15:09 --> 00:15:13

Those who most particularly need to use gentleness or those who

00:15:13 --> 00:15:16

occupy high positions of either religious or worldly

00:15:16 --> 00:15:17

responsibility,

00:15:18 --> 00:15:22

it more effects them because they have to deal with it on a day to

00:15:22 --> 00:15:23

day basis.

00:15:24 --> 00:15:28

With it, they are to treat people well and win them over. So win

00:15:28 --> 00:15:32

people over and thus become supported by the majority and gain

00:15:32 --> 00:15:36

many flow followers. So that people may be able to take from

00:15:36 --> 00:15:38

them in abundance. If you've got something good

00:15:39 --> 00:15:43

to distribute and to provide them to do in this world, then you need

00:15:43 --> 00:15:46

to use gentleness. So then there's more people that will benefit,

00:15:47 --> 00:15:50

otherwise, fewer people will benefit and no, nobody will

00:15:50 --> 00:15:55

benefits. In contrast, leaders who set aside gentleness and take do

00:15:55 --> 00:15:58

harshness and force can never enjoy wide support.

00:15:59 --> 00:16:03

They can have wide support, he explains even when some appear to

00:16:03 --> 00:16:07

have such support the very harsh leaders, being tough is different

00:16:07 --> 00:16:13

to being harsh, harsh, is undignified, being tough on cases

00:16:13 --> 00:16:16

where it's needed, that's dignified, that's required, in

00:16:16 --> 00:16:18

fact, otherwise they'd be cowardice.

00:16:19 --> 00:16:23

So he's saying, even when some appeared to have such support, it

00:16:23 --> 00:16:27

can be no more than superficial. While inwardly there will be

00:16:27 --> 00:16:32

hatred, revulsion, and feelings of oppression among the people,

00:16:32 --> 00:16:34

they'll have to say yes to this, otherwise, they'll be persecuted,

00:16:35 --> 00:16:40

or whatever the case is, but they will not be happiness. That's why

00:16:40 --> 00:16:40

Subhanallah

00:16:42 --> 00:16:45

I don't know if anybody's had this discussion. But it's something

00:16:45 --> 00:16:48

that we need to have. And hopefully, the right people will

00:16:48 --> 00:16:53

listen to it. Stop bothering the Muslims. Stop being harsh towards

00:16:53 --> 00:16:57

Muslims and Islam in this country, you will find that the Muslims are

00:16:57 --> 00:17:03

the best of people that can assist in the right causes. They have the

00:17:03 --> 00:17:06

right religion, they have the right ideas in their religion to

00:17:06 --> 00:17:11

make sacrifices. So you would be actually better off if you can get

00:17:11 --> 00:17:13

off your high horse and get away from

00:17:15 --> 00:17:18

all the ulterior motives, and all of the other

00:17:20 --> 00:17:24

forces that you have to pander to. If you want really the best for

00:17:24 --> 00:17:27

your people, then be good to your Muslim population. And you will

00:17:27 --> 00:17:31

see that they will give you the best in return. But when you act

00:17:31 --> 00:17:34

to this harshness and this belligerence, and this suspicion,

00:17:35 --> 00:17:39

and it's discrimination, then you just bring out the worst in

00:17:39 --> 00:17:39

people.

00:17:41 --> 00:17:44

If the Muslims are doing so well, despite all of this, then imagine

00:17:44 --> 00:17:48

if you were to do it well, right. And we've had examples of this in

00:17:48 --> 00:17:51

different countries, even in the modern times where the people are

00:17:51 --> 00:17:54

nice to Muslims in those countries, people, the Muslims

00:17:54 --> 00:17:58

will react in a positive way. Why do we Why do Muslims need to react

00:17:58 --> 00:18:02

in difficult ways because they feel incrimination they feel

00:18:04 --> 00:18:06

that they're not being given their fair share. They've been they've

00:18:06 --> 00:18:09

been attacked to their brothers and sisters have been attacked

00:18:09 --> 00:18:12

around the world. That's one of the main reasons because Muslims

00:18:12 --> 00:18:15

have a lot of empathy for one another. Muslims are a great

00:18:15 --> 00:18:19

global ummah. And that's something nobody can take out, nobody can

00:18:19 --> 00:18:22

take away from them, it will always exist because that's Islam,

00:18:23 --> 00:18:26

for the whole world of Muslims to be together. Yes, some of us are

00:18:26 --> 00:18:29

weak in that regard, we do not think about this on a day to day

00:18:29 --> 00:18:33

basis, but it is there, the love of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi

00:18:33 --> 00:18:37

wasallam and Allah subhanho wa Taala demands that So, this is a

00:18:37 --> 00:18:41

this is the discourse that is needed to be have and hopefully,

00:18:41 --> 00:18:43

the right people will understand that if they want to make any

00:18:43 --> 00:18:46

country prosperous, in which Muslims live and Muslim lives in

00:18:46 --> 00:18:50

live in all sorts of places. The Muslims can really as historically

00:18:50 --> 00:18:54

they have done, they can really make make places and inshallah

00:18:54 --> 00:18:57

they won't then have to resort to some of the weird things that some

00:18:57 --> 00:19:01

some Muslims unfortunately resort resorting to. But today is not the

00:19:01 --> 00:19:03

time for that this is just a feeling

00:19:04 --> 00:19:08

a topic that needs to be discussed. Thus, this is one

00:19:08 --> 00:19:12

thing. Gentleness is entirely good.

00:19:14 --> 00:19:16

You know, there's something which is good, but if you use it in some

00:19:16 --> 00:19:21

cases is that now here he's saying that gentleness is always good. So

00:19:21 --> 00:19:25

Hala, right? People are going to be wondering, but in some cases,

00:19:25 --> 00:19:28

no. Look, Jensen is always good. And the intelligent man should

00:19:28 --> 00:19:32

apply to all things, especially in dealing with people. First of all,

00:19:33 --> 00:19:37

with one's family and servants with one's family and employees.

00:19:38 --> 00:19:42

They're your closest they require the most from you. They require

00:19:42 --> 00:19:44

the greatest amount of gentleness. That's where you have to practice

00:19:44 --> 00:19:48

this. I explained. We gave a talk I think it was the previous one,

00:19:49 --> 00:19:52

where we discussed how many of us unfortunately, are actually more

00:19:52 --> 00:19:54

harsh with their own than they are with others.

00:19:55 --> 00:19:59

They're very professional and nice when it comes to others in the

00:19:59 --> 00:20:00

world.

00:20:00 --> 00:20:02

placed in other people, but in other in other situations when it

00:20:02 --> 00:20:07

comes to one's own family members, then the harshness comes out for

00:20:07 --> 00:20:12

some reason, and that's very, very wrong. So he's saying that we,

00:20:12 --> 00:20:15

especially when dealing with people, first of all with one's

00:20:15 --> 00:20:18

family and servants, then with everyone else, it should never be

00:20:18 --> 00:20:23

neglected, and it always yields the required results, even if not

00:20:23 --> 00:20:25

immediately may take a bit longer.

00:20:26 --> 00:20:29

By taking a sledgehammer, you may be able to destroy the thing

00:20:29 --> 00:20:32

straightaway, but with gentleness, you will get something much better

00:20:32 --> 00:20:36

out of it. On some rare occasions, however, gentleness may be found

00:20:36 --> 00:20:37

ineffective,

00:20:39 --> 00:20:43

especially in dealing with certain mean and ignoble creatures, how do

00:20:43 --> 00:20:46

you be gentle to them, they're so mean and ignoble. They just won't

00:20:46 --> 00:20:49

understand your gentleness, they'll take advantage of your

00:20:49 --> 00:20:53

gentleness, to try to treat such people with gentleness would be

00:20:53 --> 00:20:54

harmful to them.

00:20:55 --> 00:21:00

Because they with the intention, they would be treated, they they

00:21:00 --> 00:21:04

should be treated in an apparently harsh and severe manner. You have

00:21:04 --> 00:21:07

to sometimes deal with people in this tough manner, in an

00:21:07 --> 00:21:12

apparently harsh manner. They should be but with the intention

00:21:12 --> 00:21:15

of reforming them and correcting their behavior. So it's like a

00:21:15 --> 00:21:17

medicine. It's not your normal status.

00:21:19 --> 00:21:23

You know, there's Abu Bakr Radi Allahu anhu, once a disbeliever

00:21:23 --> 00:21:26

said something so he gave a really, really

00:21:28 --> 00:21:32

big insult. He said something really insulting to the other

00:21:32 --> 00:21:38

person on sauce? Better a lot a lot. Right? I don't want to

00:21:38 --> 00:21:42

translate it was quite insulting. Right. Now, there's some people

00:21:42 --> 00:21:47

who are very offensive in their speech. Some religious diaries as

00:21:47 --> 00:21:50

well were very offensive in their speech. They use that as an

00:21:50 --> 00:21:55

example. The Abu Bakr Siddiq or the Allahu Anhu. Look what he said

00:21:55 --> 00:21:59

it was a very, very extreme statement. We'll look over kind of

00:21:59 --> 00:22:03

the alarm set that once he didn't say it on a day to day basis, so

00:22:03 --> 00:22:07

buckler, the alarm was one of the softest and kindness and

00:22:07 --> 00:22:12

gentleness person that was one day when it was a serious situation.

00:22:12 --> 00:22:15

And he said that, and okay, you can do that as well. You can be

00:22:15 --> 00:22:18

overwhelmed and do that. But if you're making that Asuna

00:22:18 --> 00:22:21

overlockers, the degree when it was not you making it as though

00:22:21 --> 00:22:23

it's his sunnah, that he didn't want to deal with databases, and

00:22:23 --> 00:22:27

you're using that one incident, to say that this is normal. That's

00:22:27 --> 00:22:30

completely incorrect. That is not an analogy

00:22:31 --> 00:22:34

that you go around using vile words against others against other

00:22:34 --> 00:22:38

Muslims, against other Muslim scholars, sometimes the violence

00:22:38 --> 00:22:39

was up to cover.

00:22:40 --> 00:22:43

You know, Cofer candidates and Cofer bootlickers, and all of

00:22:43 --> 00:22:47

these kinds of words. Right, and shaytani, and all of that kind of

00:22:47 --> 00:22:52

stuff. And your justification is ubiquitously bigodi. Allah one was

00:22:52 --> 00:22:56

one statement. Sometimes you do have to use a bit of harshness in

00:22:56 --> 00:22:59

severe manner, but with the intention of reforming them and

00:22:59 --> 00:23:03

correct. So it's medicine or its therapeutic, it's just for the

00:23:03 --> 00:23:08

cure. It's very, it's done with a lot of elaborate thought. A

00:23:08 --> 00:23:11

certain Gnostics said that some people are only shells devoid of

00:23:11 --> 00:23:16

reason. They just forms devoid of reason. If you do not overpower

00:23:16 --> 00:23:20

them, they will overpower you. Not far removed from this is Muthana

00:23:20 --> 00:23:24

be saying Watanabe is an Arab, very famous Arab poet. He says,

00:23:25 --> 00:23:30

generosity wins the loyalty of the generous generosity wins the

00:23:30 --> 00:23:35

loyalty of the generous. But with the vial, it breeds insolence. If

00:23:35 --> 00:23:39

you're generous to the vile, it will only make them more insolent.

00:23:39 --> 00:23:44

It's just the nature of the world. For to place liberality, where the

00:23:44 --> 00:23:49

sword should be is as remote from excellence as the reverse. You

00:23:50 --> 00:23:53

were basically what he's saying is the way you need to use the sword.

00:23:53 --> 00:23:57

You can't be open hearted there, you have to use the sword and

00:23:57 --> 00:24:00

we're not talking about that here, you know, to get a tool sword or

00:24:00 --> 00:24:03

something and start using we're not talking about that, obviously,

00:24:03 --> 00:24:08

right? But these are rare instances. Involving deviant

00:24:08 --> 00:24:12

people have weak intelligence who have little good in them being

00:24:12 --> 00:24:16

ignorant and foolish. With vicious natures and beasts like souls,

00:24:17 --> 00:24:21

they are only wants to be treated harshly, they are the only ones to

00:24:21 --> 00:24:25

be treated harshly with the aim of reforming them and as a protection

00:24:25 --> 00:24:29

against their viciousness. In this way, one should understand why on

00:24:29 --> 00:24:33

certain occasions and with certain people, great men of Allah are

00:24:33 --> 00:24:37

rigorous. They're tough with those people. Why would they tough, the

00:24:37 --> 00:24:40

privacy laws was tough as well, in certain cases, especially after

00:24:41 --> 00:24:44

they opened the maca Makara. There were some people who are even

00:24:44 --> 00:24:46

holding on to the cloth of the Kaaba

00:24:47 --> 00:24:50

seeking forgiveness, but the crimes are so much that the pros

00:24:50 --> 00:24:53

have said no, they have to be they have to be dealt with. Right? He

00:24:53 --> 00:24:58

forgave so many. He forgave the son of Abuja and he gave forget he

00:24:58 --> 00:25:00

forgave so many but they

00:25:00 --> 00:25:02

Some people their crimes are such that they couldn't be forgiven.

00:25:03 --> 00:25:06

So that's the Prophet salallahu Salam does gentleness is the

00:25:06 --> 00:25:11

essence and rule. So your normal default rule and behavior and your

00:25:11 --> 00:25:17

normal quality and your normal attitude is of gentleness except

00:25:17 --> 00:25:21

when it is feared that a worker of corruption may thereby step up his

00:25:21 --> 00:25:28

corruption and transgression. But it is felt it is felt that he can

00:25:28 --> 00:25:31

be stopped only by a certain amount of severity and harshness.

00:25:31 --> 00:25:35

The messenger of allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam enjoined

00:25:35 --> 00:25:39

gentleness and behave gently in most situations. And they should

00:25:39 --> 00:25:44

be known to anyone familiar with his history, with the Hadith, and

00:25:44 --> 00:25:47

his pattern in teaching the ignorance and dealing with the

00:25:47 --> 00:25:51

near and the far once. One example of this is the well known Hadith

00:25:51 --> 00:25:55

of the Bedouin, who urinated in the masjid. Just imagine, you

00:25:55 --> 00:25:58

know, I mean, we've heard this story many times. Somebody comes

00:25:58 --> 00:26:01

in urinates here, or somebody lets his child there. Nobody, I don't

00:26:01 --> 00:26:03

think anybody's going to come and urinate here because we don't have

00:26:03 --> 00:26:05

that tradition, which is reuniting anyway. Well, there are some

00:26:05 --> 00:26:09

people who still stand on street corners and edges and do their

00:26:09 --> 00:26:11

stuff. But generally, let's say somebody came in the child was

00:26:11 --> 00:26:15

okay. Bismil let's just do it here. You know, subhanAllah you

00:26:15 --> 00:26:19

know, it's a child, man, you know, somebody Alhamdulillah I don't

00:26:19 --> 00:26:21

think we get that anymore. But in those days, you see, what you have

00:26:21 --> 00:26:25

to remember is that this man wasn't so foolish. What it is, is

00:26:25 --> 00:26:29

that the masjid was not like this. There were no carpets in the

00:26:29 --> 00:26:33

masjid there. It was just gravel, ground sand, whatever it was, and

00:26:33 --> 00:26:35

that's what they do, they will just find a corner they will do

00:26:35 --> 00:26:36

that they will cover it up.

00:26:37 --> 00:26:39

So the person thought maybe I could do it here. I mean, it was a

00:26:39 --> 00:26:42

better way. Right? So for better wind is like anywhere.

00:26:43 --> 00:26:46

Even today, you go to Mauritania, the Bedouin they get you you get

00:26:46 --> 00:26:50

one jug and in that jug is your water for drinking and your water

00:26:50 --> 00:26:55

photo and your water for the toilet. So one jug. Now people

00:26:55 --> 00:26:58

would not do that you would never drink water here with water that

00:26:58 --> 00:27:01

you're going to take into the toilet with the jug you would not

00:27:01 --> 00:27:04

drink that water. But there's a scarcity. That's the way they did

00:27:04 --> 00:27:08

things. It's a different paradigm and dimension. So that's why I'm

00:27:08 --> 00:27:11

going to give this person a bit of an excuse that you know he thought

00:27:11 --> 00:27:14

this was okay he's not living in the cities not from his TVs from

00:27:14 --> 00:27:19

the from the you know, Bedouins when he came in, you know the

00:27:19 --> 00:27:22

story I don't need to explain the road so I told them, Look, don't

00:27:22 --> 00:27:24

stop him. Now. He's already started. It's going to be harmful

00:27:24 --> 00:27:28

for him to stop midway. Right? Let it happen. Now we'll just sit here

00:27:28 --> 00:27:31

and then he called him and explain to him. Another is that the other

00:27:31 --> 00:27:34

Bedouin man who went given a donation by the Prophet sallallahu

00:27:34 --> 00:27:39

alayhi wa sallam was discontented, and utter things that he should

00:27:39 --> 00:27:42

not have said, I should at which the Prophet sallallahu alayhi

00:27:42 --> 00:27:47

wisdoms companion started to go towards him, only to be stopped by

00:27:47 --> 00:27:51

the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam who then gave the man more

00:27:51 --> 00:27:55

and went on giving him until he was spared it satisfied and spoke

00:27:55 --> 00:27:56

gracious words

00:27:58 --> 00:28:01

Subhan Allah. The third is that of the young man who said to the

00:28:01 --> 00:28:04

Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa salam, O Messenger of Allah grant

00:28:04 --> 00:28:06

me permission to commit adultery.

00:28:07 --> 00:28:11

Che let me let me do adultery man, I need to phony Kate, let me do

00:28:11 --> 00:28:14

adultery. If somebody comes and asks you that the Prophet

00:28:14 --> 00:28:17

sallallahu Sallam replied, would you like this to happen to your

00:28:17 --> 00:28:21

daughter? So he reverse psychology, reverse psychology use

00:28:21 --> 00:28:27

that on him? He answered, No. So he said likewise, other people do

00:28:27 --> 00:28:29

not like it to happen to their daughters.

00:28:31 --> 00:28:33

And he passed his hand over the young man's chest and prayed for

00:28:33 --> 00:28:38

him. Subhanallah what an effect of that, if only we could have also

00:28:38 --> 00:28:42

had the promise of lies on the hand over our heads or even on our

00:28:42 --> 00:28:46

shoulder Subhanallah maybe in the hereafter inshallah inshallah in

00:28:46 --> 00:28:47

the Hereafter.

00:28:48 --> 00:28:52

And from then on, nothing more was abhorrent to this man and

00:28:52 --> 00:28:55

adultery. There are many other such stories that have been

00:28:55 --> 00:28:59

narrated about him, as well as about the leaders after him, the

00:28:59 --> 00:29:02

scholars and the virtuous among our rightly guided spaces,

00:29:02 --> 00:29:06

predecessors and those of their successors who emulate them, so be

00:29:06 --> 00:29:10

gentle in all matters. It is a blessing and its consequences are

00:29:10 --> 00:29:11

good.

00:29:13 --> 00:29:17

Allah hola says, When are you? laka Illa Lavina Subbarao?

00:29:19 --> 00:29:24

Are you la casa Illa do Halloween Halloween, but none are granted it

00:29:24 --> 00:29:28

save those who are patient and none are granted it save the one

00:29:28 --> 00:29:32

who is greatly fortunate. So if we want this, we need to ask for two

00:29:32 --> 00:29:36

things. Number one, we need to have patience. And number two, we

00:29:36 --> 00:29:39

need to consider ourselves to be fortunate in the sight of Allah

00:29:39 --> 00:29:43

subhanaw taala meaning that Allah has written good for us, which

00:29:43 --> 00:29:46

means we have to call on to Allah subhanaw taala I would think that

00:29:46 --> 00:29:48

one of the biggest What do you think one of the biggest

00:29:48 --> 00:29:52

challenges to somebody who's always been harsh, harsh, harsh to

00:29:52 --> 00:29:57

calm down would be that I'm going to lose my status. I'm known as a

00:29:57 --> 00:29:58

very tough person.

00:30:00 --> 00:30:03

And I'm known for that. It's almost like there's an arrogance

00:30:03 --> 00:30:06

built into that. There's a pride and arrogance built into that.

00:30:06 --> 00:30:10

It's about leaving that. It's tough. It is tough. There's a lot

00:30:10 --> 00:30:12

of things you have to change. It's connected to so many different

00:30:12 --> 00:30:16

things you have to unbolt, unscrew a lot of different issues and kind

00:30:16 --> 00:30:20

of re envisage who you are and what you want to be. But why

00:30:20 --> 00:30:22

wouldn't you want to be like the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa

00:30:22 --> 00:30:24

sallam May Allah make it easy for us? May Allah make it easy for us.

00:30:25 --> 00:30:29

But gentleness is something that will adorn everything, may Allah

00:30:29 --> 00:30:30

grant us a gentleness

00:30:31 --> 00:30:36

May Allah subhanaw taala make it easy and make this truly a source

00:30:36 --> 00:30:39

of purification? Elevation remove the difficulties that we are all

00:30:39 --> 00:30:42

having. And may Allah allow us to be stronger believers than weaker

00:30:42 --> 00:30:45

believers. Okay with that one and hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen

00:30:45 --> 00:30:47

wellness and because

00:30:50 --> 00:30:53

a lot of me are you a younger medical history a lot on your hand

00:30:53 --> 00:30:54

and you haven't done

00:30:56 --> 00:31:00

the Subhanak in Kannada nobody mean just Allah or Hannah Mohammed

00:31:00 --> 00:31:05

Amma who had your Allah have mercy upon us. Yeah, Allah teaches ya

00:31:05 --> 00:31:08

Allah allow us to learn. Allow us to know that which you want us to

00:31:08 --> 00:31:13

know. Allah forgive us purify us, oh Allah remove the darkness from

00:31:13 --> 00:31:16

our life and from our hearts. Oh ALLAH from our eyes. Oh Allah.

00:31:18 --> 00:31:23

protect us from looking hearing seeing touching and engaging with

00:31:23 --> 00:31:27

all that is wrong. Oh Allah forgive us our many, many mistakes

00:31:27 --> 00:31:30

and many sins that we have committed in the past and that we

00:31:30 --> 00:31:34

may still be committing Oh ALLAH purify us. Oh Allah make us

00:31:34 --> 00:31:38

satisfied with the life of goodness life of virtue, a life of

00:31:38 --> 00:31:42

obedience, make it Beloved to us. Allow us to cherish it or Allah

00:31:42 --> 00:31:46

and Allah stranger enjoy it. Oh Allah grant us the Halawa Eman.

00:31:46 --> 00:31:49

Grant us the sweetness of our faith of Allah we know we don't

00:31:49 --> 00:31:53

try enough Oh Allah we engage in many wrongs. We have a lot of

00:31:53 --> 00:31:57

shortcomings. Our love it we asked for protection we ask for.

00:31:59 --> 00:32:03

Photography we ask for divine enablement of Allah, Allah have

00:32:03 --> 00:32:07

you mercy upon us and the mercy upon the people love the world of

00:32:07 --> 00:32:12

Allah make us the way you want us all to be? Oh Allah, remove this

00:32:12 --> 00:32:17

calamity, this pandemic from from the world of Allah, allow us to be

00:32:17 --> 00:32:20

worthy of your mercy worthy of your forgiveness worthy of your

00:32:20 --> 00:32:24

generosity, of Allah worthy of your clemency and your

00:32:24 --> 00:32:28

forbearance. Oh Allah make our last moments, the best of our

00:32:28 --> 00:32:32

moments in this world. Oh Allah make the end of our life the best

00:32:32 --> 00:32:36

of our days in this life. Oh Allah make the time we stand in front of

00:32:36 --> 00:32:40

you the best moments of our existence. Oh Allah, bless the

00:32:40 --> 00:32:43

people of this masjid and all of those who facilitate to allow this

00:32:43 --> 00:32:47

program or law those who are listening to dancing I mean, and

00:32:47 --> 00:32:50

those will will listen say I mean, I'll accept all of our doors will

00:32:50 --> 00:32:54

accept our doors, the those of us who are sick, those who know

00:32:54 --> 00:32:58

people who are sick of Allah, cure them, grant them, if you grant

00:32:58 --> 00:33:01

them if you those who have departed Oh Allah grant them

00:33:01 --> 00:33:05

absolute forgiveness and place in gender to fill those and oh Allah

00:33:05 --> 00:33:08

allow us to make the rest of our life better than the previous part

00:33:08 --> 00:33:11

of our life. So why not because popular is the term IOC Fonasa

00:33:11 --> 00:33:13

Ramona animal sitting on hamdulillah

Share Page