Yasmin Mogahed – Serenity – Making The Most Of Ramadan

Yasmin Mogahed
Share Page

AI: Summary ©

The importance of forgiveness and mercy towards Islam is emphasized in these past 10 days. Forgiveness is seen as a way to let go of anger and strengthen relationships, while forgiveness is a commitment to oneself and not a punishment. Open lines for questions and promotions are available for listeners. Consistent fasting and praying for the right thing are also emphasized. forgiveness is seen as a means to protect one's personal and family, and is not a means to avoid harm.

AI: Summary ©

00:00:32 --> 00:01:23
			Assalamu alaikum This is Yasmin Mujahid and you're listening to serenity streaming live on one
legacy radio. We are getting closer and closer to the end of this blessing gift of Allah subhanho wa
Taala the month of Ramadan. And we have entered when will hamdulillah into the last 10 days. And we
are Subhan Allah This is one of the you know, on top of the gift that Allah has given us of Ramadan
is he has given us the last 10 days. And this is an opportunity for all of us to be forgiven in sha
Allah Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim, WA Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah Juan and he was on the edge
main. Now, I want to talk just a little bit about the significance of the last 10 days of Ramadan,
		
00:01:23 --> 00:02:15
			the profits of ice and then when he spoke about the last, you know, he we were told that that in
this within this period of time, in the last portion, the last 10 days of Ramadan, the last 10
nights specifically, there is one night that is greater than 1000 months height on an alpha shot.
And if you calculate the you know what 1000 months actually equals, you'll find that it's more
rather 1000 months is is about 83 years. So Allah subhanaw taala has told us that there is one night
that is greater than 83 point, I think it's something like 83.3 years. So what what we're being told
actually is that in this one night, we have the opportunity to receive more reward than a lifetime
		
00:02:15 --> 00:03:03
			because when you look at the lifetime of a human being, it's almost exactly the average lifespan is
almost exactly around this, this, you know this number, and yet this one single night is greater
than an entire lifetime. This is part of the mercy of Allah subhanaw taala is that he gives us that
opportunity. And we are also told that whoever prays on that night and and seeking, you know,
sincerely for Allah subhanaw taala and seeking his reward, will, will have all of their previous
sins forgiven. It's important for us to understand the part of this Hadith, which mentions the
intention being for Allah subhanaw taala alone. A lot of times, there's so much ritual associated
		
00:03:03 --> 00:03:49
			with what we do in Ramadan, we have large camps, which you know, and hamdulillah The idea behind it
is good to bring people to the masjid to bring people to you know, to pray PM, but sometimes, you
know, it can potentially be a little bit more of a social gathering. So it's important to just stay
focused and to end to realize why it is that what what you really want to get out of it. And so this
the the the pm itself standing and praying on Laila to God is something that if we do it with the
right focus and the right state of mind and heart, it's, it's something that can give us back a
clean sheet Allah subhanaw taala Can, can take that book that has all of our sins written on it and
		
00:03:49 --> 00:04:36
			and in exchange for it, give us something that's blank Allah Subhana data having forgiven all of our
sins, and you'll and you know, this is actually I did a webinar about about the the topic of making
the most of the last 10 days and I spoke about a an activity that that we used to do, and it's, I
think it's, uh, it kind of just really brings this point home of being forgiven in these last 10
days. And that is, you know, the participants are first asked to take a sheet of paper and try to
just bring to mind to remember their sins from the last week, and then write them down. Of course,
this is you know, being done privately. And then to try to bring it to mind our sins from the last
		
00:04:37 --> 00:04:59
			two weeks and then the last month, and then eventually from the last year and just writing them
down. As soon as this you know, they've had some time to write it down. Then the organizers you
know, kind of make, you know, tell tell the other organizers Okay, you can go ahead and collect the
papers now. And you can imagine at that point
		
00:05:00 --> 00:05:42
			happens, that's when, you know, the panic sets in. Because everybody's so mortified and they're so,
you know, it's extremely scary to think that someone's going to collect this. So people will do
different things at that point in their panic, you know, people start ripping their paper, you know,
just somehow trying to just get rid of it. And the point of the exercise actually is that, of
course, the papers do not get collected, but it was, it's, it's, it's to show it's to make a point.
And that is that we are very, very worried about other people seeing that paper seeing our sins, but
we don't always bring to mind and realize that all of those sins were done in front of Allah subhana
		
00:05:42 --> 00:06:24
			wa, tada, that Allah saw that, you know, while it was happening, and, you know, sometimes we are,
unfortunately, more worried about what what people see than we are about what Allah subhanaw taala
sees. And that just that we have this shyness, which we should, of course, about our sins in front
of people, but we don't have enough shyness about our sins in front of Allah subhanaw taala, who
obviously sees all of it, and then beyond that, is that you now have an opportunity to have that
sheet of paper that's covered with a sins and you know, of course, it's not just one piece of paper,
but it's a book full of sins, that you have the opportunity in, you know, in this blessed time to,
		
00:06:24 --> 00:07:10
			to have that taken away, and then hand it a clean sheet. We know that when we wronged a human being,
uh, usually, even if the person you know, you know, they forgive us or, or you know, they're gonna
be really gracious and forgive us. It's like, it can't be erased, you know, it can't be forgotten.
Whereas with Allah subhana wa tada it's a different Allah can completely erase the sin as if it
didn't happen. And even beyond that, Allah says he can try he can exchange or he can turn those bad
deeds into good deeds. So imagine like not just erasing the sin but actually transforming the sin
into good deeds. This is the mercy of Allah subhana wa Tada. And that's what we're, that's what we
		
00:07:10 --> 00:07:43
			seek in this month is we seek We ask Allah subhanaw taala by His mercy to forgive us. And this is
what I Isha, or the lion who was told by the prophet sallallahu Sallam when she asked him, if we see
if we know that this is a little harder the night of power, what should we say and the Prophet
sallallahu wasallam said, a lahoma in NACA for one to hibou laughs What far for Allah, Allah you are
the most oft pardoning You are the oft pardoning you love to pardon, so pardon us.
		
00:07:45 --> 00:08:34
			And so we ask Allah subhanaw taala by this attribute, Allah tells us to ask by this attribute, that
Allah would would pardon us and Allah loves to pardon. But one thing that I want to bring up and
that is how, what is the one of the fastest ways to attain that pardon of Allah subhanaw taala. And
when you look, some have Allah throughout the quarter end and you look throughout the the Sunnah of
the Prophet sallallahu sallam, and a Hadith, you find a sort of an overall trend and you learn a
lesson about the forgiveness of Allah and the mercy of Allah. And it's a very powerful lesson. And
that lesson is that if we want to be forgiven by Allah subhanho wa Taala, we need to forgive others.
		
00:08:34 --> 00:09:28
			And there's this very strong and intimate link between attaining the forgiveness and mercy of Allah
subhanaw taala. And, and giving that forgiveness and mercy towards the creation, it's upon Allah
because Allah is so merciful to his creation, and he's made this this deal on their behalf, right?
That if you forgive my servants, if you are merciful to my servants, then I will be merciful to you.
It's, it's it's amazing on every level, because on the one hand, Allah is so generous, that you give
him something or you you pay you know, something finite forgiveness, letting something go, not
holding a grudge, you know, turning away from a mistake that was happened that that happened against
		
00:09:28 --> 00:09:59
			me and you and you turn away from it, just that Act, which is of course very is a finite act right.
So limited in in because of that in exchange for that Allah is giving us something infinite. So some
for something finite, we we buy, in a sense, something infinite. And of course, it is not a fair
trade. We are giving something so small and Ally's responding by giving us something infinite, which
is His forgiveness and his mercy. And Allah says that the one
		
00:10:00 --> 00:10:22
			Who is not merciful to the creation, then then Allah subhanaw taala won't be merciful to them, if we
want to love to forgive us if we want on this, you know to be to leave Ramadan to, to enter and then
leave these last 10 blessed nights forgiven by Allah subhanaw taala we need to make the the
conscious decision
		
00:10:24 --> 00:11:09
			and ended, you know, be determined that we are going to forgive those who have wronged us. And we
will do it in sha Allah with that intention. You don't do things, you know, sometimes people say,
but they don't deserve to be forgiven or, you know, they but they didn't apologize or they didn't do
X, Y and Z to make them deserving. And to that I want to ask, Do any of us deserve the forgiveness
of Allah? Have any of us really, you know, paid for it in full or something like that, have any of
us actually done? What makes us able to stand up and say, now I deserve to be forgiven? And and now
I deserve Jenna. There's no such thing because as we know, even the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu
		
00:11:09 --> 00:11:42
			wasallam said that he does not enter Jenna, by his deeds, he enters Jenna, by the mercy of Allah
subhanaw taala. You know, this is something that amazed even the you know, the companions, peace be
upon them all, they said, you know, they said, even you owed us will allow, you know, when he said
that no one enters Jenna by their deeds. And they said even you own a salon? He said, yes, even me,
except that it would be by the mercy of a life of lies merciful to me. So if the profits of I send
them
		
00:11:43 --> 00:12:29
			doesn't by Jenna or deserve Jenna with his deeds, what are we, so we have to really realize this, we
when we when we deal with the creation, we have to deal with the creation in a way that we want the
creator to deal with us. That's, I think, a very important take home message. You know, again, I
hope that every time we begin a conversation, that there's at least some take home messages and and
if there's any take home message in this conversation, I hope it is that, that that deal with people
and treat people in the way that you want a lot to treat you on the Day of Judgment. And I think
when we when we start to do that, then you'll find that a lot of the problems that we have socially
		
00:12:29 --> 00:13:17
			and in our communities would would disappear, that if we instead of, you know, if you imagine if
Allah subhanaw taala were to treat us in the way that we treat others. That would be very scary. You
know, if somebody wrongs us, and we hold on to it, and we refuse to let it go, even sometimes when
they apologize. And then and then we think that you know what would happen to us? If we if Allah
held us accountable for even just one of our sins, if Allah subhanaw taala was not merciful to us
and overlooked a llama in NACA from one to hibbeler 451 How do we, you know, look at Allah, how do
we face Allah subhanaw taala and ask him for his if asked him for his pardon at the sea and at the
		
00:13:17 --> 00:13:27
			same time refuse to pardon others. It's It's, it's, it's not sincere, how can we how can we even do
that, that we have to be,
		
00:13:28 --> 00:14:10
			you know, realize that there isn't, you know, we can't have this double standard that we want a lot
to treat us in a certain way. And yet we treat others in a very, very different way. We ask Allah
subhanaw taala that he would treat us with mercy and pardon, and if we really want that we need to
treat others with mercy and pardon. So inshallah I'm going to take a short break, and when we
return, I'm going to be opening up the lines for the first time and the number is 714-988-8182.
Again, the number is 714-988-8182. inshallah, when we return, we will be opening the lines for you
to call in
		
00:14:42 --> 00:15:00
			Assalamu alaikum This is Yasmin Mujahid and you're listening to serenity streaming live on one
legacy radio. We are discussing today how to make the most of the last 10 nights of Ramadan and we
are opening up the lines for you to call in live. The number again is 714
		
00:15:00 --> 00:15:27
			49888182 you can go ahead and call, you know, share with us a couple of things you can call share
with us, you know, maybe some advice or something that you're doing in these last 10 nights that are
that have been very beneficial and something maybe you can share. Or you know, if you have a
question about something maybe you are struggling with and and what was the ending, what's the best
way of dealing with it, we have talked,
		
00:15:28 --> 00:16:10
			you know, until now about this, this this different angle at seeking Allah subhanaw taala as
forgiveness and it's I think it's an angle that a lot of times has been forgotten in the past, in in
how we are treating other people law has linked the to the mercy that we show to the creation and
the mercy that Allah subhanaw taala shows to us. If we hold everyone accountable, and refuse to let
go for every every wrong that they have done, then we should expect that we will be treated the same
way on the Day of Judgment. And if we are treated that way on the Day of Judgment, then we would be
destroyed because if we are actually held accountable for what we've done, we would not be able to
		
00:16:10 --> 00:16:57
			enter agenda as we are told by the prophets and like I said them, we are in need of the mercy of
Allah if we want to enter Jannah but we have to be willing to give that mercy to others. So
inshallah if you if you want to, you can write your questions in the chat box, you can also call in
as we're waiting for calls to come in. I'll share inshallah a couple more. You know a lot about the
importance of forgiveness, when Allah subhanaw taala describes the the the those who have to one or
the Mycenaean those who who are who act with SN and sn as we know is the highest level of Amen. The
moistening are those, you know, you have the Muslim and the Muslims. And then you have the mote
		
00:16:57 --> 00:17:41
			meaning the believers which is a higher level than just a Muslim. And then at the very highest level
is a moccasin, the one who now we're not just talking about Islam, or Amen, but we're talking about
Yes, and the most beautiful way of doing anything the most beautiful faith, the most beautiful
manners the most beautiful trust in Allah subhanaw taala just, it's it's this beautiful
beautification of the way in which we are and the way in which we believe and the more than one of
the descriptions that Allah subhanaw taala gives us are those people who forgive and Allah when he
says about that with a layman, a shaitana regime was Sadie Oh, Mr. filata mineral become a Jeanette
		
00:17:41 --> 00:18:26
			and Otto has somewhere to a lot of debt. Lynn Martin, and levena Jung Hoon, FSR, rah, rah, he will
carry me and alive while I've been on in ness, Allah is describing those people first he tells us to
race towards the the forgiveness of Allah subhanaw taala. And the agenda which expands its width is
like the heavens and the earth, it's been saved for them a tepee and those who have Taqwa, the
righteous ones. The next idea goes on to describe them. Those who spend in difficulty and an ease
when you have, you know, when you have the means to set to spend, when you have the money when you
have the time you spend, but even when you when you don't as well, when it's difficult to find the
		
00:18:26 --> 00:18:48
			time when it's difficult to find the money. And you also spend at that time, like having you know
life, those who suppress their anger will often and ns, those who pardon others, and you'll notice
in this area, this word, the same word that we're calling a law, using, it's that same word we call
upon Allah subhanaw taala. With
		
00:18:49 --> 00:19:36
			that word, if pardon, pardoning that will feed on in us the ones who pardon people. And you know,
Subhanallah, this is exactly the the attribute, of course, Allah subhanaw taala is the the source
and perfection of that attribute. But it's that same, that same concept that we are told to call a
law with, on, you know, a little harder, this was the advice of the Prophet silibinin send them that
if you if you know, it's a little harder, you ask Aloma in you say Aloma in nikka phone to have
Buddha 451. And this is the same attribute, of course, at a human level that we are told, is a
characteristic of those people who will who will be who are the most lucky and who are the the
		
00:19:36 --> 00:19:59
			righteous. Someone asks the question when we forgive someone, do we have to be friends with them to
I mean, someone really wronged me and now they want to invite me to their house. Is it wrong if I
decline? And of course there is. It's not a black and white issue in terms of what how is it that we
then have to interact once we've forgiven but but let's just begin
		
00:20:00 --> 00:20:50
			At the start, and that is that forgiveness is an act of the heart forgiveness is something inside of
you, that you are no longer holding on to anger or rage or grudges inside. So to forgive. First and
foremost, it's a letting go internally of your anger, letting go internally of the need to hold that
person accountable, letting go internally of the need to to seek justice, or revenge or whatever it
is that you're holding on to. And in that letting go, you're actually not liberating that person,
you're liberating your own self, you are the one who ends up being imprisoned by your anger, you
know, there's a saying that you are not punished for your anger, you are punished by your anger.
		
00:20:51 --> 00:21:07
			Anger in and of itself is a punishment for the one who harbors it. It's, it's like us, it's a prison
for the one who who holds on to it. And and, and so when you're holding on to anger, you're really
imprisoning your own self. And ironically, you're giving that person
		
00:21:09 --> 00:21:31
			too much power over you. Because you're you, the more that you hold on to anger, you're actually
sort of enslaving yourself to that person that you're angry at. And that person has the control over
you to actually occupy your mind to occupy your thoughts. For someone for you to give someone the
power or the,
		
00:21:32 --> 00:21:54
			to the power to occupy your thoughts during your prayers. I mean, that's just, that's too much, you
know, that's, you're, you're, you're losing something priceless. For the sake of this person, which
you're actually very angry at. It's, it's, it's a, it's, it's actually you yourself, are, you're
harming yourself, and you're giving that person too much,
		
00:21:55 --> 00:22:37
			you know, too much power over you. So letting go inside, that is the key. And then once you let go
inside, the behavior follows more easily, right now, when you're holding on still to that anger. Or
you are, you know, you're not able to let go, it becomes a lot harder to even imagine how you would
act. But I'll tell you that once you let go inside, it becomes a lot easier to in your behavior
outside and how you act with that person. But but just to kind of quickly answer, it doesn't mean
that that person has to be your best friend. It just means that you still keep ties you don't
completely cut them off. At least we know that we're not supposed to ever cut off our families
		
00:22:37 --> 00:23:00
			completely. And even our you know, our own brother and sister in Islam, we're not supposed to go
more than three days, you know, cutting off or not speaking in the sense of because you're angry. So
keeping the ties it doesn't mean that you have to be the best of friends, but ultimately letting go
inside it will bring about ease in your relationship outside inshallah we have Ayesha online right
now. I just said I'm on a calm
		
00:23:02 --> 00:23:05
			on how are you? How are you doing? I'm good.
		
00:23:06 --> 00:23:12
			I have actually two questions. Is that okay? Sure. Yes, go ahead. You are a first caller. So you're
special.
		
00:23:14 --> 00:23:27
			Okay. Well, first question is, is there a different way to ask for forgiveness for known sins rather
than unknown sins? I mean, for speaking in regards to laters. And other I mean, we have that
		
00:23:28 --> 00:23:32
			what we're supposed to say about my nickel funds, sort of philosophizing.
		
00:23:33 --> 00:23:38
			We have that, but is there anything else that we should be saying we should say for known sins?
		
00:23:39 --> 00:23:52
			And second question is, how do we attain that level of focus? And, you know, tune in to that level
of grief that we should have about our sins when we're asking for forgiveness?
		
00:23:53 --> 00:24:38
			Okay, beautiful questions. First, is there. So the general da that were told Aloma in neckarsulm
went to Hezbollah for FAFSA? And that's Yes, that Yeah, as you as you mentioned, this is sort of a
general deny that we should all say, however, it is actually necessary and extremely important to
also seek forgiveness for the known sins, as you said, those specific sins that you know, about, and
you, you know, you you've committed those sins. And this is the process of Toba. No, scholars say
that the the, for repentance to be accepted by Allah subhanaw taala. There are certain
characteristics or certain requirements, if you will, in order for that to be a sincere repentance.
		
00:24:38 --> 00:25:00
			And one of them is that you do have that sense of remorse, that you have that sense of that you
actually really regret and you feel pain, about doing the sin. You can't, even with a human being,
you know, when you're apologizing to a human being and you have absolutely no remorse, that human
being is much less likely to forgive
		
00:25:00 --> 00:25:08
			Have you if you have no remorse, and you're just kind of just, it's just lip service, I'm sorry.
Okay, I'm really sorry. It's, it's, you know, it's not very, very
		
00:25:09 --> 00:25:52
			convincing even for a human being. And so with Allah subhanaw taala, we need to have that remorse
inside of ourselves is default, asking for forgiveness is not an act of the tongue, as you know,
it's an act of the heart. So feeling that sense of remorse, and then stopping the sin. You know, we
were asking for forgiveness for a specific known sin, we need to stop doing the sin and then
finally, intending sincerely not to return to that sin. That does not mean that if we end up, you
know, falling into that sin, that that necessarily means that, you know, it didn't count, but
rather, Allah knows the heart and what was our what was really our intention? Are we saying stuff
		
00:25:52 --> 00:26:07
			for the last talk really, you know, kind of going to confession? I'm planning on doing it again next
next week? Allah knows. So making really the sincere intention. And I think there's the second part
of your question was about that remorse? Correct? Correct. Yes. bringing about that remorse.
		
00:26:08 --> 00:26:51
			I think, you know, one, one exercise is similar to what I spoke about at the beginning of the show,
and if you imagine writing down that sin, that you're or, or that group of sins that you need to
seek forgiveness for, if you imagine writing it down somewhere, and then it getting published in the
newspaper or something with your name on it, or, or being put on Facebook, you know, in public
forum, and everybody's seeing it or even a picture, you know, of you engaging in the Senate, for
everybody to see. And you think about how that would make you feel. And I think that that's one way
to very, you know, across the board, I think it would, it brings about this feeling of shame, and
		
00:26:51 --> 00:27:32
			brings about this feeling of embarrassment, at the idea of of people seeing the sin. So I think
that's the first step if if we're having trouble sort of feeling that shame or feeling that remorse,
imagine what you would feel if it was publicized, to the, to the creation, if it was publicized to
the world, and then realizing that it is publicized to Allah subhanaw taala Allah sees it. And that
same shame that we have should actually be more, but I think that that's a very practical way to, to
bring about that feeling of embarrassment. Because we think, you know, what would happen if the
people saw you know, and just just just thinking about it in that way, another way to bring about I
		
00:27:32 --> 00:27:37
			think that the sense of remorse is you think about what happens if
		
00:27:39 --> 00:28:21
			you know with a human being Okay, so we'll use that example a human being who your entire life, they
supported you financially, they gave you they took care of you, they protected you this person maybe
took you in when you are on the street suppose they're you know, your you are homeless, you you
didn't have a family and this person took you into their home, you know, took care of you spent
money on you protected you and then one day you come and you you know you burn down their house or,
or you vandalized their car. And, and and just thinking about, you know, even if you had no remorse
over burning down this person's house, just bringing to mind all that this person did for you, that
		
00:28:21 --> 00:29:00
			when you were out on the street, they took you in no one else would would take you in and and they
fed you and they protected you and they took care of you. And I think that there's when you bring to
mind all that someone has done to you and then you think about the wrong you've done to them, you
can't help but feel this sense of guilt and remorse. As you know, just just as a heart that's that's
awake will feel that that but but but if I don't realize all that this person did to me, then it
would be a lot harder to bring it you know might be harder to bring brings, you know that that
feeling of remorse. But when I remember that this person did all this for me if you feel no matter
		
00:29:00 --> 00:29:38
			who you are, you're going to feel a sense of shame. And so of course Allah subhanaw taala is the
above any analogy and Allah is the one who took us in, when we were desperate, you know, when we had
nothing, we you know, there's this beautiful Hadith that says that all of you are, are hungry except
who Allah feeds. And all of you are thirsty except who Allah gives drink and all of you are naked,
except those who will look close, we have nothing except what Allah subhanaw taala has given us and
we would all be, you know destitute on the street if it had not been for our last panel data and his
and his mercy on us. And, and and the greatest gift that Allah has given us is the gift of Islam.
		
00:29:38 --> 00:29:59
			Just think about where we would be if we did not have that gift, and just bring about that, that
sense of gratitude. When you look at all that Allah has given us and then we look at what we, you
know, Allah sends down blessings, we send up sins. And you know, when we look at that transaction
that we have with a less penalty that we can't help but feel great deep sense of shame.
		
00:30:04 --> 00:30:09
			Thank you so much but that actually helps a lot I I've been writing down everything you
		
00:30:11 --> 00:30:25
			thank you so much that really helped me especially in Milan when I know I can work on myself a lot
better than I can't. I couldn't other time. So thank you so much. Where yakko wakko salaam aleikum?
Wa.
		
00:30:27 --> 00:31:09
			So, you know, spawn a lime I'm, I'm happy. I'm so glad that that question was asked. I think it's
something that we we oftentimes we talk a lot about Toba and seeking Allah subhanaw taala is
forgiveness. But too much of it is, it's again, it's a ritual, we maybe we say stuff for a certain
number of times. So for a lot of stuff for the stock for Allah. But Subhana Allah, you know, Toba
and his dickwad, it really is not an act of your tongue, it's an act of the heart, the heart needs
to look, look at the two things look at what Allah has given you. And look at what what we give a
law. And it's it's embarrassing, it's it's it's very, it's, it's you, you can't help it feel very
		
00:31:09 --> 00:31:40
			embarrassed by the by what we provide what we give a lot of thought in exchange for all that He
gives us. So inshallah I hope that that, that that's beneficial. And I, you know, again, please do
call in, we have open the lines, the number again is 714-988-8182. That number again, is
714-988-8182, we will go ahead and take another short break. And we will continue to open the lines
when we return
		
00:32:12 --> 00:33:00
			Assalamu alaikum, this is your sandwich I head and you're listening to serenity streaming live on
one legacy, radio, and Hamdulillah, we have opened our lines today and we are discussing how to make
the most of the last 10 nights of Ramadan and how to seek Allah Subhana dadas forgiveness. And one
of the ways that we that we are sharing is that we forgive others, one of the fastest ways to to
attain the forgiveness of the Creator is to forgive the creation. And one of the fastest ways to
attain the mercy of the Creator is to be merciful to the creation. And, you know, we have some
questions here at the chat box. And we also have our lines open, our number is 714-988-8182. Someone
		
00:33:00 --> 00:33:21
			asks, What if someone wrongs you and you forgive that person, after a while that person gives a
gift, but you decline and refuse to accept? Is that wrong? And I would actually say yes, it is
wrong, to refuse the gift for a number of reasons. One, if you really did forgive, you wouldn't be
refusing the gift.
		
00:33:22 --> 00:34:01
			Unless there's some other reason that we don't know about that you need to refuse the gift. But if
it's just simply because, you know, you just don't want to take a gift from this person. That's an
indication that you haven't really forgiven and you haven't really let go. And so it's important
that we look at that as an indicator of whether we really have forgiven. And secondly, it's an
Islamic principle, actually not to refuse gifts. It's an epistemic principle. For example, when
you're invited for dinner or for a wedding or, or something of that sort you one of the rights that
a believer has upon you is that you accept and that you go if it's at all possible, refusing gifts,
		
00:34:01 --> 00:34:38
			breaks, relationships, refusing invitations, breaks relationships, and this so this is one of the
things we're taught in our Deen as part of the mom and the manners of how to treat each other and
the rights that our brother has a sister has upon another in Islam is that you accept these
invitations and you accept these gifts that it brings together the hearts and and so I would say
yes, you should accept the gift. And and it's it's it is also an perhaps an indication that you
haven't really forgiven and May Allah subhanaw taala make it easy on all of us to truly let go of
those grudges. And to be like the that man who the prophets I sent him described as one of the
		
00:34:38 --> 00:34:51
			people of Jenna and it was one simple thing that he was doing is that he was cleaning his heart
every night before he stopped from any grudges that he has against another believer. And hamdulillah
we have a rush on the line Santa Monica.
		
00:34:55 --> 00:34:57
			How are you hamdulillah How are you?
		
00:35:00 --> 00:35:13
			Have an amazing show. And I'm really inspired by your talk. I just want to say I'm going to share a
thought like Ramadan is going to end. And for the first time, I'm feeling like something we are
going to miss.
		
00:35:14 --> 00:35:34
			We are like, trying to purify our souls trying to do good deeds. And slowly bit by bit, we are
eating that Venus, like our stems if we can hope that Allah and Allah will forgive ourselves. But
it's only because of Allah as mercy that we start in prayer wanting
		
00:35:36 --> 00:35:44
			it is mercy. And I just got asked, How can we continue? Right? How can we be in that state? Always
after?
		
00:35:46 --> 00:35:57
			Okay, very good question. This, this is a couple of things that this question brings up, how do we
continue this momentum. And this state, you ask? One thing to keep in mind,
		
00:35:58 --> 00:36:42
			that's very important to realize, is that no state is constant, completely constant. So one thing
that makes us oftentimes fall into despair, and to give up perhaps, is that we want our state to be
constant and something that isn't a characteristic of this life. So our state will always be
slightly changing up and down. This is something that the prophets lie Selim even told to ever walk,
the line that had had their state remained constant had their state been the same when they are in
his presence versus when they are in their family's presence, than the angels would have shook hands
with them in the streets in one Howdy. So this hadith is telling us that if we were constantly at
		
00:36:42 --> 00:37:23
			this peak of, of Eman And this peak state, then we would be angels, we wouldn't be you know, human
beings. So that's one thing really to keep in mind and to not set ourselves up for despair and
disappointment. Because sometimes when we have unrealistic expectations, we are more likely to give
up once those expectations are not met. So that's one thing to keep in mind that, you know, in sha
Allah we will be in so it's even possible to get to get to a higher state one isn't saying that this
is the best you're ever going to be. And it's all downhill from here that that's not the the the the
point, we can always improve inshallah, but it's just important to realize that that constancy is
		
00:37:23 --> 00:38:07
			not a characteristic of this life. This life is constantly changing, in fact, and it's only a law
that's constant. So we will go up and down, but not to lose hope, if we go down, and inshallah we
can also go up. However, some things that we can do in order to maintain as much as we can of this,
of this heightened state of newness to the last panel, Donna, and that is, look at the actions that
we're doing in Ramadan. There are there are a number of a Baghdad of acts of worship, that are
consistent and this is key, the key word in this whole statement is consistency. So if you were
looking at this sentence, in you know, in front of you, you would put, you know, like underline this
		
00:38:07 --> 00:38:34
			scent, this word, you would put it in bold, maybe in caps consistent. We are consistently waking up
in the last third of the night. We are consistently fasting, we are consistently reading what and
and reflecting on it. We are consistently praying extra prayers, we are consistently asking for
forgiveness, you see the things that we're doing every single day, consistently. Yes, and so it is
no wonder that there's that heightened state.
		
00:38:35 --> 00:38:51
			And for me, like for a person like me, I can never, even if I try so hard to get up for the normal
days, it's not possible but during these last two panels, I can toggle us on how he enables one to
get up.
		
00:38:54 --> 00:39:32
			And the same one who can enable you and Ramadan can enable you outside of Ramadan so that the key
here is to put your hope in Allah and, and to strive for that. And and to ask Allah subhanaw taala
This is something we don't do enough of By the way, we rely too much on our own selves in our data.
We think that, you know, the worship is is because it's for Allah, we it doesn't cross our mind that
we should be asking Allah to help us it's kind of like when you're giving someone you know you're
doing something for someone. Suppose you think you're doing someone a favor, right? human
relationship, you think you're doing someone a favor, you're not going to ask them to help you with
		
00:39:32 --> 00:39:59
			the favor you're doing for them. You know what I'm saying? It's like it's not something we think
about. But this is the wrong concept of how our a betta is with a law. First of all I betta to Allah
is not a favor on Allah is not a gift to Allah. It's the other way around. It's a favor on us. It's
a It's a gift for us. And so we ask actually a lot to help us. We ask Allah subhanaw taala to give
us the ability to worship Him because it's it's a gift for me. It's my gift. It's for me. It's not
for him.
		
00:40:00 --> 00:40:33
			In the sense that he is not benefiting from it, I'm benefiting from it. So asking ALLAH, you know in
certain Fatiha, which we say, at least 17 times a day yakka Naboo, where he can assign the two go
together, that you alone do we worship and You alone? Do we seek help from it, we cannot worship a
lot without the help of Allah. So seeking the help of allies key that if you want to wake up
prophetic, I mean, 4pm you want to be consistent in these things? ask Allah to make it easy for you
the same way he's made it easy for you in this month, inshallah.
		
00:40:37 --> 00:40:39
			There's no way you can send away Yeah, come
		
00:40:40 --> 00:40:43
			walaikum salam o De La Hoya barchetta.
		
00:40:44 --> 00:41:00
			And so at Hamdulillah, we have we have questions coming in, you can go ahead and call the lines are
open, the number is 714-988-8182. We have some questions also in the chat box. And one of the
questions says,
		
00:41:04 --> 00:41:17
			okay, sister, yes, mean, I had a question. What if you are the one asking for forgiveness from a
person, but they don't forgive you? And what they and what they do they don't forget what you did
and not give you a chance?
		
00:41:22 --> 00:42:00
			not give you a chance to show them you are trustworthy? How do you show someone you are trustworthy?
And you won't do anything? So when you are the one who's wronged someone else, you know, and how do
you seek that forgiveness. It is upon us to do everything in our power to try to rectify the wrongs
that we've done to people. And sometimes that's possible, and sometimes it isn't. But Allah sees
your sincerity unless sees your efforts. And you try you first you ask Allah subhanaw taala, to
forgive you for what you did wrong. You ask Allah Subhana Allah to forgive the person who you have
wronged. And then you ask the person to forgive you. Sometimes, it may not be possible to directly
		
00:42:00 --> 00:42:45
			ask the person to forgive you, for example, asking the person to forgive, you may create more
problems than not doing so. Depending on the situation. You know, in those cases, you do everything
in your power, to ask Allah to forgive that person, and to also ask Allah Subhana Allah to forgive
you. But if you are able to ask that person's forgiveness, you do it it with with all sincerity.
Now, one principle in Islam, again, that we need to understand, and we need to unlearn this concept
of attachment to results. One one principle in Islam is that we are we are going to be held
accountable for doing our part as much as possible. We can't have control over the results because
		
00:42:45 --> 00:43:24
			the results are not in our hands necessarily. For example, I you know, you get this question,
children who are very concerned about their parents not being pleased with them. But if the child
has done everything in their power and is keeping the, you know, you know, sometimes a child might
do everything that they can, you know, they're not wronging their parents in any way they're,
they're trying to be the best, you know, very respectful and very, and doing everything that would
be pleasing to Allah subhanaw taala but, but the parent is still not pleased. And and so they feel
well how will I ever, you know, succeed, you know, how will I be, you know, pleasing to Allah, if I
		
00:43:24 --> 00:43:48
			can't please my parents and sometimes it's just, if you've done everything in your power, sometimes
the result is not in your hands. And so we ask Allah subhanaw taala to, to forgive us into and to
forgive that person. But but but you just have to be truthful with a law that you have done
everything that you can and you have sincerely really tried whatever you can to seek that person's
forgiveness.
		
00:43:51 --> 00:44:02
			If someone is still in the process of wrongdoing, you though they said they are sorry, am I to
forgive this person though I don't believe in their apology and see them continued to sin against
me.
		
00:44:04 --> 00:44:13
			You know, there's there's a difference between forgiving someone and continuing to put yourself in a
situation where you will be harmed or wronged
		
00:44:14 --> 00:44:24
			forgiveness doesn't mean being passive or allowing someone to abuse you. This is very important.
It's islamically you know, you you're supposed to be
		
00:44:26 --> 00:44:59
			keeping it protecting your own self from being wronged protecting yourself from injustice or from
harm or from abuse, you can still forgive and at the same time, keep yourself and protect yourself
from from further abuse or further harm. The two are not mutually you know, that they don't have to
go together. That forgiveness means I continue to let you harm me rather, those two are not
connected. So what you do on the one hand is you protect yourself and and your family and those
around you from being harmed. And on the other hand,
		
00:45:00 --> 00:45:29
			You can still forgive. Again, forgiveness is an act of the heart, it's internal, and forgive the
person. But that does not mean that you allow the person to continue to wrong you, as if somebody is
in the process of continuing to wrong you that's not something you should put yourself in a
situation to, you know, to continue to be wronged. However, you remove yourself from that situation,
you'll protect yourself and your family. But you can still forgive. Forgiveness is letting go
internally of the grudge and of the anger.
		
00:45:34 --> 00:45:38
			So we are getting questions in the chat box. Let's see.
		
00:45:43 --> 00:46:26
			Someone has wronged me over and over again, I'm scared, if I forgive, I will be hurt again, by this
person. What do I do with the situation? It seems to me that that again, there's this
misunderstanding of what forgiving means. I forgive inside of me, does that mean for example, I had
a relationship with someone and this person is hurting me? Does forgiveness mean that I have to keep
having that relationship with that person? No, that's not what forgiveness necessarily means. I
could forgive a person and still remove myself from the situation, the two again are not necessarily
connected, I can remove myself from a situation of abuse or of harm. And at the same time, forgive
		
00:46:26 --> 00:47:05
			forgiveness does not mean and I want to just emphasize this point. Forgiveness does not mean that I
have to continue to put myself in the situation in which I am being harmed. This, this is not the
definition of forgiveness. Forgiveness means that I'm not going to hold this person, maybe I'm not
going to punish the person for it, I may let it go, I may forget, I may, you know turn away from it.
I let go internally of the grudge and the anger. But I will not continue to put myself in a
situation where I will be harmed again or I will be wronged again, please understand the two are not
connected and and they're two separate issues. islamically again, you know, the Prophet sallallahu
		
00:47:05 --> 00:47:44
			Sallam said, when you see something wrong, you have to try to you should try to change it with your
hand. And if you cannot, then you try to speak out against it, you tried to change it with your
tongue. And if you cannot, then hate it in your heart. And this is the weakest of EMA and the
weakest of faith. As believers we are supposed to be standing up for what's right and never just
accepting oppression or accepting abuse, whether it's happening to those around us whether it's
happening overseas, in Syria or warmer or anywhere, or whether it's happening to me to under my roof
in my house, or to my children or or to my family or those near to me. So it's it's extremely
		
00:47:44 --> 00:48:10
			important that we do not misunderstand these concepts of sub patience and the concepts of
forgiveness. And as as being passive to abuse or or continuing to put ourselves in situations where
we will be harmed or wronged or those around us will be harmed and wronged so I hope inshallah, that
that's clear, that's clear that forgiveness does not mean that that you put yourself in that
situation again, but it doesn't mean letting go of the anger.
		
00:48:12 --> 00:48:57
			synonyms history is mean Ramadan greetings from South America. I have just discovered your lectures
and writings have stumbled on and it's contributing to me having a more meaningful Ramadan and
having dinner thank you so much for your work. And hamdulillah May Allah bless all of your Ramadan's
and and Chela, please keep me in my family in your eyes. I don't know, if you have. I did mention
this last last week, but come to LA my book was just launched this weekend and hamdulillah it's it
is available on my website. It's called reclaim your heart. And it's available at Yes Men which I
had.com that's ysminmoghd.com and this is a book I hope inshallah we'll be something beneficial in
		
00:48:57 --> 00:49:25
			terms of really just freeing the heart from all of these types of including, you know, it's a panel
of the topic we're talking about today, freeing the heart of the anger, freeing the heart of, of the
resentment and and holding on to, you know, any anytime we go through a hardship or we lose
something, being able to not be enslaved to those things, and to those people who have who have
heard us. This is a big part of freeing ourselves inshallah.
		
00:49:26 --> 00:49:30
			So, inshallah, I'm going to take one last question. And
		
00:49:37 --> 00:49:55
			there's an interesting discussion in the chat box. Okay. So someone asks, What if they deleted you
off Facebook as friends and in real life, it's awkward. I don't exactly. I don't know exactly what I
did wrong. And I don't know how to that and I don't want to judge that. I can't help a judge that
she might not like me.
		
00:49:57 --> 00:50:00
			Again, you know, you do your part. If you don't, if you don't know
		
00:50:00 --> 00:50:45
			That you've done something wrong, and someone is, you know, randomly seeming to cut you off. The
important thing is that you just continue to do your part and continue to treat the person well. If
you if, if you find out, you know what it is that, that that's hurting the person or something that
you apologize and, you know, again, keep in mind that every action that we do, ultimately, it's not
a transaction with the person, it's a transaction with a law and the way in which we treat people,
what we need to do is see Allah in the way we treat people you see a lot in people, this is the way
to, to treat people with with accent with in the most beautiful manner is we see a lot and we see,
		
00:50:45 --> 00:51:25
			okay, how would I want to treat me in this situation? Or how would I want to treat me on the Day of
Judgment, that's how I'm going to treat this person. And, you know how, and and just, again, any any
goodness that you show to that person, realize it's not for the sake of that person, it's, it's not
because you need that person as your friend or not, but it's just it's for a less powerful data
sake. And that's the way to really, you know, have reached that level of Sn. Everything you know,
that you do is knowing that Allah is watching you. And this is actually the definition that the
prophet SAW I sent him gave us for sn it's worshiping Allah, as if you can see him and until
		
00:51:25 --> 00:51:45
			treating people as if you can see a law in that situation. And if you can't see him know that he
sees you a huning Holy habba was stuck for a while he would come in number four Rahim subhanak alaba
ham darkness shadow en la ilaha illa and istockphoto corner to Lake was salam o Alaikum
warahmatullahi wabarakatuh