Date of presentation: February 8, 2015
Yasmin Mogahed – Connecting to God in Everyday Life
AI: Summary ©
The speakers stress the importance of connecting to God in daily life and avoiding loss of life. They emphasize the need for constant guidance and effort to achieve success, protecting one's heart and mind, and pursuing guidance from Allah. The importance of positive thinking in building stronger relationships is emphasized, along with showing gratitude and positivity to clients to prevent negative emotions and build stronger relationships.
AI: Summary ©
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think I might hold it. Is that right if I hold it, okay.
All right. I will relay him in a shed on a regime. smilla rahmanir rahim wa salatu salam ala rasulillah wanna catch mine? And I'll be traveling Saudi Arabia Siddeley Omri wahala aka melissani of Coco Lee
Wow. So I want to begin by saying that I already feel really welcomed in this community Mashallah.
You guys are already here waiting Subhanallah in this community already, like I just arrived a few hours ago and, you know, some places you just feel the warmth, you know, and I've, I think I've come to recognize that I really love the South.
I grew up in Wisconsin in the Midwest, and yeah, we're okay over there. But the South is pretty warm. Mashallah, I live in Raleigh. And I, you know, it's also the south and I appreciate the, the southern hospitality. So I want to tell you that it's an honor to be part of, you know, to be joining and visiting your community. I asked the last panel to Allah to allow us to meet again, and to make these words beneficial and maleness. Pathetic, except the theme for this talk is about connecting to God in everyday life. And why this is such an important question is for two reasons. Number one, the first half of the title which is connecting to God, why is it important to connect
to God? This is a very important question. And the second part of the title explains the importance of this of this topic. And that is in everyday life. Because as we know, we live in a world that's full of distractions. We live in a world that's full of detours, right? We are trying very hard, everyone in this room, we're here for a reason, right? And we're trying really, really hard to stay on a set often stuck in right, the straight path. But it's not always easy. There's a lot of times when we get off track. So the question that we have to ask, we have to really break it down to two parts. One is why is it important to connect to God at all? And what is the purpose and the
significance of connecting to God? And second, how do we do that and still continue to live in this life, right, still continue to be involved in the roles that we have to be involved in? And we as believers,
you know, our Deen is not one where we say, you know, never get married, live as a monk, you know, pull yourself away from society entirely and completely. That's not the balance that the prophets I send them teaches us. And so how do we continue to live in dunya, while still not becoming owned by dunya? And that's the question. But before I get into that, I want to talk about first the importance of connecting to God. You know, it's,
before we discuss any kind of concept or topic, you I need to first convince you that it's important, right, we need to first understand the significance of that topic. And when I say connecting to God, our question has to be well, why does that really matter? To really understand the significance of connecting to God, we have to rewind, we have to press rewind, to the beginning of of our of our time. And when I say to the beginning of time, I don't just mean to add them at this point. I mean, even before Adam, the Allah subhanaw taala tells us in the Quran, that there was a realm, even before you know, this whole realm that we're in now there was a realm before that, in
which all of the souls, they stood in front of God. And Allah says that he had every single one of those souls bear witness to something. He asked them LS to be to become, Am I not your Lord? Am I not your Lord? Now, when I say all the souls, I mean, every soul, including the soul of Bill Meyer, I mean, we're talking about every soul, we're talking about the atheist soul. We're talking about the agnostic soul. We're talking about the Judeo Christian who's now a Jew and a Christian, who's now an atheist or an agnostic. I'm talking about every soul, and every soul.
took this covenant, basically, they took and they bared, we bore witness of what God says, Am I not your Lord, unless to rob bacon? And every single soul, said, Bella shahina. Indeed, we bear witness, we bear witness that You are our Lord. What how what does this even mean? What does it mean that at some point
In our existence, our souls because you guys we have to realize, we are we consist of two parts. Every human being consists of two parts, the physical part, which is the body, and then the spiritual part, which is the soul, and the heart. The body is something temporary, the body is something new, the body is only for dunya. But your soul is not something new. And your soul is not something that ends at dunya does it? The soul continues to the grave, and then from the grave continues to the Day of Judgment, and then continues forever in, in the hereafter. Your soul is what took and bore the and said, I bear witness that You are our Lord benatia hidden. What does this
mean? It means that within every single human being is something called fitrah. This is the fifth row of the human being, What does fitrah mean? It means human nature. That means that no matter who you are, it's already ingrained inside you to know and recognize God.
And that the only problem is that this nature gets covered up, this nature gets suppressed, this nature becomes corrupted. And that's why people stray from that nature. And that nature is to heat to recognize the one true Lord, only Allah subhanaw taala ls it this, this, this witness bearing witness that he is your Lord. So this is our fitrah It is our very nature to know God and to connect to God. Now, there's another question that a lot of people struggle with. And this is the question of what am I doing here? Right? What is the purpose of life?
Many people don't know the answer to this question. Most people don't know the answer to this question. A lot has answered this question very, very clearly in the end. Well, Mr. haluk, to general insulin, Dr. Boone, Allah says we have not created jinn and human beings. Now first of all, before we continue, we have to look at the structure of this a
there's a different there's, there's various ways I can say something
I can say to you, Hey, I'm Memphis community.
I, I came to this community, because I heard you have really good ribs.
But I also came to this community to give a talk. And I also came to this community because you have you know, this, this Chinese restaurant that was really good. You guys take took me two. So I have various different purposes of why I came to Memphis, if I say, if I structure my sentence like this, I came to Memphis to Xyz. But what if I say to you, I did not come to Memphis for any other purpose. Except to give y'all a talk. What if I said that, then could there be any other purpose? It's just one. And it's because I began the statement by saying, I came for no other purpose. So what I've done is I have negated any other purpose. And that means that there's only one purpose and no
purpose along with that one purpose. Now, let's go back to the A does the HSA does the HSA, we created genuine human beings to worship us?
It doesn't say that. It says when mahalo oxygen Noel INS inlandia boon, which means actually, we've not created gin and human beings for any other purpose. So so far, Allah has just deleted I mean, he's, he's cleaned the slate of any purpose. And then what does Allah say he uses the word Illa.
What does it mean?
Except, so inlet is used to say that this is the only purpose after you first erase and you you know, you get a blank sheet of paper. And then you and you say except this one, it's like I tell you, I didn't come to Memphis for any purpose, except this one. So what it does is it It leaves that purpose to stand alone. And in this area, what it does is it leaves our purpose to stand alone, that there's only one purpose and what is that purpose? 11 Dr. Boone, except to fulfill a Buddha to Allah, except to worship God to know and love and then the concept of Oh, Buddha is a whole other subject. But what is it that is our purpose? It is Oh, Buddha and nothing else. That's our ultimate
purpose. So, so that way I don't get confused. I don't think my purpose is oh Buddha and to be the richest person in the world, right? My purpose isn't obaldia and to be a size four
You know, I'm saying, that's not I don't have any other purpose with obaldia. It's very clear for me this was my purpose of existence is to fulfill obaldia to Allah. What is obaldia Oba D is a very, very, very powerful concept. And it literally means to enslave yourself essentially right oh data from abs and abdomens to a slave. Let me ask you guys a question. When you think of the word slave in your mind, what comes to mind? Typically what kinds of images come to mind when you think of the word slave?
obedience? What else? Just the first thing that comes to mind we think of a slave.
Hmm.
submission. But I want images guys give me images, what do you see? chains? You see chains, right? You see somebody who's like cap is a captive? Yeah. Do you think of freedom? Or do you think of the opposite of oppression? When you think of slave typically?
oppression? Now this is what's so powerful about obaldia is that when you enslave yourself to God, you're actually freeing yourself.
That's a completely different concept. And why is it that it frees you? Because when you enslave yourself to God, you're freeing yourself from the slavery to any other thing. Any other thing? Meaning that I'm not a slave to money anymore, because I'm a slave only to God
means I am not a slave to society's standards. Because I'm a slave to God. I'm not a slave of get this one what other people think?
what other people say, you know how we live our lives, and we teach our children to live their lives based on what people are going to say, what people are going to think you should show us this as well or no,
you should. You should act based on what people it's like we we live our lives in such a way. And we teach our children in such a way where it's like, No, no, no, beta Beatty, whatever you want. It's like, No, no, no, don't. Don't do that. Because what are people going to say?
Or my son or my daughter? I mean, it's not it's not specific to only one culture. It's not specific to only one culture, but this mentality of I act, or I don't act, because what are people going to think? And what are people going to say? This is a type of slavery. This is a type of slavery, it means that I'm a slave to what people think. Because when I act based on, on what people gonna think that means I'm a slave.
When I act, and I and I, and I choose to live my life based on what society commands me to do, that's the type of slavery when I hear and I obey, that means I'm a slave. Now, the problem is we take lots of different kinds of masters.
You see, if you go and you study society, and you study people, you find that people take a lot of different types of masters. And even though someone's an atheist, doesn't mean that they're not a slave. They're still a slave. Every single person is a slave. The question is, what are you a slave to?
Some people are slaves to money.
Some people are slaves to their own selves to their own desires.
I just okay. Sprite. I'm laughing because I just drink a sprite at the restaurant. What's the tagline for sprite? what's the what's does anybody remember what it is? obey your thirst. Right? Okay.
Nike,
just do it. Hmm.
Do you guys notice a pattern?
Love it. Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. Um, at least it's telling you to love I mean, I won't say anything about but but the problem that you find in advertising is there is an emphasis on obey your desires. Alright? obey your thirst. Just do it. You know, I'm saying just do it. So if you feel it, obey it, it's obey your impulses, obey your desires, obey your lower self. And this is this is exactly a this is a type of worship, that whatever I feel I do, if I feel a desire, if I feel a desire, right or wrong, I do it. And then I justify it based on the fact that I felt a desire. Why do you think people are trying to justify homosexuality? It's just based on a desire, I feel it therefore it must
be right. I feel it. Therefore I must obey. And this idea that whatever I feel right or
wrong I obey is a type of worship. It's what Allah describes in sort of jetha, when he says what's translated as Do you see the one who takes his hella as his Illa, he takes his own desires as his Lord. This is a type of worship. So whatever it is that I obey, is is like a master for me and I'm a slave. Oh, Buddha means that I choose instead of worshiping instead of being a slave to any of these other things, I am only a slave to God. And that's super duper powerful. Because it makes you free, it frees you. Therefore Odia is to is actually freedom. It's not, it's not in the typical sense of slavery. It's not It's not the typical sense of slavery, like chains and oppression, it's actually
freeing yourself, but only when you enslave yourself to Allah. Because I enslaved myself to a lot I have freed myself from other slavery, slavery to money, slavery to fashion, that's another type of interesting slavery.
It's a subtle kind of cut. It's a subtle kind of slavery. What do I mean by that? I mean, that, you know, when fashion tells us to dress a certain way, and it's kind of like,
it keeps changing. And the standards of what we put on now are things that we wouldn't be caught dead wearing five years ago. That's a fact.
Especially guys with the skinny jeans. I mean, really?
Let's be real.
If you told the guy five years ago, can we just be real for a second? If you told the guy five years ago to put on those pants? They would say, Are you crazy? And now they're wearing it?
So my point is that my point is that we have in a way we have actually, we've made it so that society and fashion has a power over us. It makes it it's like we hear and we obey we take commandments, you know what I mean? It's like, fine, the sunglasses look like goggles. Fine. They didn't always look like goggles but that's okay. At least it doesn't contradict Shetty. Right. But what about when it contradicts? But we hear and we obey fashion said so why are you Why are you wearing like tights? No their pants. Now there though. That's how it looks.
I always say this, but
I always say I still remember the days when jeans used to look like pants.
Those are long gone days. Now they're just tights. Now they're just tights, but we still call them pants and we wear them alone. My whole point is we wouldn't have done that before. And that's because our whole what we feel comfortable with has been determined by fashion. We hear and we obey. We need to be careful. What are we obeying? Like, really, we have to have standards. We can't just be pulled wherever the tide takes us. We can't we can't just be pulled wherever the tide takes us. It says do this today. We say we hear and we obey. today. This is what pants look like tomorrow. That's what pants look like what's next. I can't hear and obey anything else but God. And if
anything is in line with with what Allah says fine. I can take it. But if it is his contradicts, I need to reject it. I can't be someone who just goes with the tide. This is one of our problems as an oma is that we the prophets I send them described our state over 1400 years ago, he said that the people will soon summon one another call one another to feast on you. Like people call one another to share in their dish of food. You know, you have a big dish of food, especially back home, like you have this huge dish everybody's kind of eating together. He says that the people will call one another to attack you. The same way that people call one another to share in their dish.
And the companions asked Is it because we will be small in number? And he said no, actually, you'll be larger number. But here's what's gonna happen to you. You will become like the froth on the ocean. You're gonna like bubbles, the scum. They're just at the top of the water. It has no substance. It goes wherever the tide takes it. It's not something that has solid roots and principles. It just goes with the tide.
And he says that God will take the fear from the hearts of your enemies, they won't fear you anymore. And what will happen instead is what will be put in your hearts is something called weapon.
And when he defined when he said two things have been dounia Pokhara here to mount the love of dunya and the hatred of death.
This is like
This is prophecy. This is exactly why we're in the situation we're in today and it's in exact explanation. We are weak.
Why are we weak?
We are weak because our hearts are full of when our hearts are full of love of this life and hatred of death, we are attached to this life.
And we go wherever the tide takes us. We don't have solid roots as Allah described in the Quran and sort of Ibrahim, what is Allah described? This this tree shujaa this tree, this good tree? And how does he describe this tree? He says, a slew has sad bit. What photo will have its roots are solid, our firm. Think about the difference between the scum on the ocean, the bubbles on the water and the tree with roots. What's the difference? What's the difference? One is solid. One has a foundation. It doesn't just go wherever you know the wind takes it. It's solid. And because how is it solid, it's solid, because it has that firm foundation. And the wind when it comes it doesn't break it
down. It doesn't take it this way. In that way. It's firm.
But this frost, it just goes wherever the tie takes it and it's not solid. This is because love of dunia and hatred of death, we've lost our foundation. And so obaldia the concept of obaldia is as the companion said, when he came and he said to the people, I have come to free you from the slavery to the slave and bring you to the slavery of the lord of the slave. That's what ABA is. It's to free you from all these other kinds of slavery. It's for you to acknowledge that only a law is my compass. Only a law is what I hear. And I obey without question, nothing else. Not society, not fashion, not money, not status, not power. I don't worship these things. And oh, Buddha is the very
purpose of why we were created.
Where does the rest of everyday life fit in? Where does the rest fit in? And how does this fit into having solid roots? Well, here's the thing.
One of the beautiful analogies that the scholars gives a give about this life
is he says, mmm Rosie Rahim Allah He says that
our journey in this life is like a boat in the ocean. And the boat itself is like the heart. And the ocean is like the dounia. All right, following. Now what happens to a boat that allows the water of the ocean to enter?
Its sinks. You see, a boat can only survive in the ocean, so long as it doesn't allow the ocean to enter.
And in the same way, the hearts can only survive in this life, so long as it doesn't allow this life to enter.
But it's when it allows this life to enter that. You know what, who's in control. I want you to think about this. When there's no water in the boat, the boat is in control.
Okay, but as soon as the ocean enters a boat who's in control the ocean and the ocean will take care of that ship. The ocean will own that ship, and it will break that ship. Let's talk about the Titanic. Right? The Titanic was a massive ship. Right? It was the unsinkable ship, actually. And all it took was what some holes in the boat, some holes in the boat and then what happened? The ocean entered a loss. That's the end of the boat. It's split and it's sunk. And that's what happens to the heart.
When the heart does have been dunia This is the disease of all diseases, this have been dunia. The love of dunya is the core and root of all other diseases. And it is honestly the core and root of every single problem we have.
Why is the prophets I send them saying that the weapon in the heart, hobbit dunya the love of this life. When we are attached to this life, that's when we become weak. That is the reason for our weakness. And only when we stop being attached to this life, do we become strong and we become that solid tree not that froth on the ocean.
How do you do that, though? How do you live in dunia without allowing dunia to enter? How do we do it? Do we do we just stay in attic f all day and all night and every day of the year? Do we just not get married? Do we fast all the time? Do we pray all the time and never sleep? Well this was a question
Question that actually came up during the time of the Prophet. So I sent them
there were companions who wanted to sort of Excel right in, in, in their worship. So one of them said, I will never marry, I'll never get married so that I can excel in my worship. Another one said, I'll pray all night and not sleep. And then third one said, I will fast to not break my fast.
When the prophets I send them heard about this, what we learned was that he sallallahu Sallam is the closest to Allah. And he married women. He fasted some and he broke his fesem. And he slept some and he prayed some.
Therefore, this balance, this keeping the water out of the boat isn't about shunning and taking ourselves completely out of dunya. Because we have to be in dunya, we don't have a choice. It's like, it's like the ocean, it's like you gotta cross it to get to the other side, is no way out of it. You know, we have to go through dunya to get to akhira. The question is, are we going to float? Or are we going to sink? That's really the question. But it's not an option for you not to be in dunya, it's just not an option, you have to be here, you have to be involved, you can do anything else you are going to have to live, you're gonna have to eat, you're gonna have to sleep, you're
gonna have to get married, maybe, yeah, you're gonna have to, you know, probably gonna, you're gonna have to do, you're gonna have to have a job, you know, you're gonna have to go to school, you're gonna have to deal with problems, you're gonna have to deal with siblings, that
these are things you're going to have to deal with, you're gonna have to deal with money. So you can't say, Okay, I just won't own any money. So I don't get attached, can you? You have to have money to live, right? So what do I do? What's the solution? Here's the solution, you got to keep that stuff in your hand and not in the heart. Got to keep all that stuff in the hand and not in the heart. That means that you have these things, you're involved in these things. But these things don't become your ultimate attachment and your ultimate dependency, you don't allow the water of the ocean to enter into the boat. Okay, that sounds like it's really hard. It isn't easy. And it's a
process. And you know, what's going to happen is Yeah, water is going to come in the boat, and it's going to need to be taken out. Water is going to come in the boat, and it's going to need to be taken out.
And sometimes the boat is going to sink, and people are going to reach a place where they feel like
I'm at rock bottom. I don't even think I can go on and you can still go on and you can still fix it. A law can fix even the most broken of boats, a lot can fix even the most broken of hearts. As long as we're still alive. Allah gives us chances after chances after chances there is never a time when you should despair. Never a time when it's too late. You can always come back and one of my favorite quotes, I have it in my book is this quote of imoca Iam Rahim Allah, where he says that shaitan was very happy he rejoiced when Adam was sent down from heaven. But what he didn't realize is that the diver sinks to the bottom of the ocean, to gather pearls and then rise again.
Pamela,
that is the journey of us in this life. Yes, sometimes we, we go down. Sometimes we hit these, these rock bottom, sometimes we slip, sometimes we mess up, we will mess up. And sometimes we hit very low places in our life. But that low place isn't the end. That low place may be part of the journey, and you come back up. The only problem is if you stay down there and you lose hope. That's the only problem. The problem isn't that you sunk. The problem is if you stay there, makes sense. And guess who wants to make you stay there? shavon. That's why shaitan uses despair. shaitan will use despair on you. Let me tell you two tricks of shaitan on this journey to tricks, depending on where you're
at, when you're up. He uses arrogance.
And when you're down, he uses despair.
What do I mean? I mean, when you feel like you're on top of your game, right? You just started practicing. You're wearing your hijab, you know, you got your short pants and your big beard. You feel good about yourself, right? you're practicing you're on your salon, you're doing things and when you're in that state, he wants to come at you with arrogance. He wants to make you feel that you're really righteous and that you're really awesome. And everyone else is down here. Right? So that's why you have to go out and you have to become part of the Hutton police
You get some times he, he deceives us into being self righteous, self righteous meaning thinking I'm perfect. And everyone else has a problem. And it's my job to fix everybody else, because I'm already perfect. You know, I'm saying, like, I'm already God's gift to mankind.
I've already become an angel. So let me just work on everyone else.
You know what?
Yeah, that's called self deception. That's called the hood. And it's a type of arrogance. It's impossible for you to ever be perfect. It's impossible that you have nothing to work on in yourself. It's impossible. And if you think it's so it means that you have a worse problem than the one who's you know that you're judging, because you got arrogance in your heart. You got you got self deception. All right. So shaitan will come that was like, Look, man, you're awesome. Right? Like, like that. And then look at all those other people. They can do what you're doing. You just stood up and prayed the head dude, yesterday, look what they're doing. They can't even like get get their act
together. And and what it does, is it when it makes you feel proud of yourself and look down on others, he has already put, you know, helped you to put one of the worst diseases in the heart. And that's the disease of arrogance. When you feel arrogant.
When you feel arrogant, it's going to make you stop trying as hard.
Now, what happens when you slip?
Because you know what, you're not perfect. You're going to slip. What happens when you slip. Now he comes from a different door. See, yesterday, he came from the door of what arrogance, to make you feel like you're all that right, and to look down on others. By the way, this was the problem of shaitan, wasn't it? You know, shaitan didn't have a didn't have an issue with worship. He was actually one of the great at least was a great worshiper. He used to be in the company of angels because he was a great worshiper. But what was his problem?
arrogance he said, Why should I he said, I'm gonna bout to add them when you created him from you create me from firing him from clay. He was arrogant, and his arrogance is what made him not obey God. But and I want to point out something important about shaitan he didn't make such though, right? Everyone knows this.
And then eventually what happened? He got kicked out of Jenna. Okay. Let me ask you guys a question.
If every time we as human beings missed one such duh, we would be kicked out of Jenna, would anyone go to heaven?
Do you feel my question? I will repeat it
such how many such does
for
one Fed has for such this
one fed for such this? Do you think that if if missing one such the Met? We couldn't go to Jenna, nobody would go to Jenna, am I right? You think you never in your entire life missed one Finch. Like when you were like 17 or something? You know what I'm saying? shaitan misses one such that and he gets kicked out. Was it the problem that he didn't?
What is the problem? Somebody told me?
He didn't repent.
he disobeyed but but don't we? Don't we? You see the question. he disobeyed. Oh, yeah. But let me ask you a question. If every time that we disobeyed Allah, we went to *. Nobody would go to anywhere but *. Don't we disobey a law? Is anyone in this room never disobeyed a law raise your hand?
Well, if you think so then you got a problem.
Because you're deceived. Of course you of course you're not perfect. he disobeyed a law but so do we. But there's something very important that he did not do. Let me ask you this.
Wasn't Adam told not to do something?
He said don't eat from the tree, right? What did he do?
He ate from that same tree. Hold up. Hold up. Adam. He ate from a tree wasn't supposed to. And it please refuse to bow.
So wait a second. What's the difference?
He did. True. But this was the reason he disobeyed. But how did they respond after that Adam slipped
Please disobeyed. Right. But Adams response was Robin of alumna and fusina. Were in lamb takfiri Lana with her hammer and akuna Minal Casa de Adams response was our Lord, we have wronged our own selves. And if you don't forgive us and have mercy on us, we will be among the losers. That was Adams response. And you know, it's very interesting to note that Adam alayhis salam, he doesn't even blame it, please.
Do you notice this in his diet? He never, he could have said, but at least made me do it. Right? Even though it really at least is the one who deceived him to correct. But he doesn't say that. He says we wronged our own selves. So he takes responsibility. And he humbles himself. And he seeks forgiveness. But it leaves instead what does he do? He says, he like, blames a law. He says, because you've kicked me out. It's as if it's a LA's fault. Because you've kicked me out of Jenna, I'm gonna do this to your servants, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna attack them from every single direction, because you kicked me out who can his arrogance, but not just his arrogance, the fact that he
despaired in the in even to repent, he couldn't humble himself to repent. And he despaired in that Mercy of Allah, it leaves a blesser. Right? He despaired. And so the key that we have to focus on here is that repentance, and that hope that we can always come back and we can repent, but at least wants you to do what he did, which is to despair. So as soon as you make a mistake, and now you're at the bottom right, now, when you're at the bottom, he wants you to stay there. How does he keep you there?
By telling you, you know what, your you've committed way too many sins, there is no way you can go back to there's no way you can you can even
go back to Allah, you're too far away. You're too far away. You're such a hypocrite, you know, one of the one of the tricks of shaitan is when you commit a sin, he'll try to keep you from doing an act of worship.
So for example, you committed a sin. So he'll tell you, you you committed that sin, and then you're gonna go pray.
Right? You committed that sin, you're gonna go pray, why you're such a hypocrite, or very typical.
I feel like a hypocrite in my hijab, I should just take it off.
I feel like a hypocrite, right? Because I'm, I'm not perfect. I'm not an angel, I should just take off my hijab, that's shaitan. That's shaitan wanting you to despair. When you aren't perfect. He wants you to give up. Right? As soon as you're feeling down, he wants you to give up. So this is the way that shaitan comes at you in different ways. When you're down, he wants you to despair. And when you're up, he wants you to be arrogant.
How do we in everyday life, maintain this relationship with Allah? inshallah I want to close with some practical ways? All right. If you want to think about how to take care of the heart, how do we take care of our relationship with Allah? Ask yourself, how do you take care of the body? What's the most important thing to maintain the body?
Well, you can go an entire day without water, right?
Something else you can go an entire day without oxygen. Yay, oxygen, right? I can't go even beyond, you know, certain number of seconds, that oxygen.
The heart also needs oxygen. And when you deprive the heart of oxygen, it also dies just like the body. Does anyone know what the oxygen of the heart is?
Salah, and Quran. And in general, it's called the Vic. the remembrance of Allah is the oxygen of the heart. It keeps the heart alive and beating. All right. And when a person cuts off the remembrance of Allah, whether they stop praying, or they stop, you know, their their connection to quote on their connection to the law, and it's this thought and any kind of Vicar of a law, they're cutting off oxygen to the heart.
It will die, and it will end and it's like a person who says, I mean, you never you never hear a person saying, you know, I'm busy right now. I'm at a meeting. I'm in a meeting. I'm in a class. I think I'll breathe tonight. I'll just put off breathing for later on, right? Or I'm at at the mall and like Macy's has a really great sale. So let me just you know, I'll breathe when I get home. Anybody do that? Raise your hand. If you did that.
Yeah, you know, nobody can raise your hand because they'd be dead. Um, you can't do that because you'll be dead. You can't say I'm in a meeting. I'm not going to breathe, right? Yes. But we do this with Salah, don't we? Right? I mean, no one says I'm at the airport, dude, I can't breathe.
Yeah, think about it, when you're at the airport, I spent a lot of time at airports. And, you know, if it's like, that's what I have to, you have to think that like, okay, it's not so comfortable right now. But it's oxygen, I have to breathe. And I'm not gonna say that I'm not gonna breathe because I'm at the airport. Makes sense. I'm not going to say I can't, Oh, I can't breathe. I'm in a class, you when you begin to see that salaah is the oxygen of the heart, then you start to behave with Salah as you should. Only then and Salaam is the oxygen of the heart.
It's like, I use this example. Because it's kind of funny.
Using the bathroom. Like, you know, no one in the world will say, you know, I mean, I'm taking a test, I'm in a meeting. I need to go to the bathroom. But you know what, I'm just just going to put that off. Because why don't why don't people do that?
There's a reason that you use the bathroom when you need to use it. What is it? It's pretty obvious? Because it would be mortifying, if you didn't.
Yeah.
Like you don't care what the professor is doing. If you need to go to the bathroom, you will get out and leave, right? Yes or no? You know, this lady, she was saying to me, like, I can't pray at work. Because I work in a preschool. And I am the only one with the kids. I said, sister how to use the bathroom.
Oh, I call a teacher in.
And she watches the minutes while I go use the bathroom. I said, Okay.
You see the priorities, though? I mean, that's the point. Because where there's a will there's a way and you're gonna use the bathroom if you need to. And it doesn't matter. Let me give you another example. You're sleeping and it's your time.
It's your time.
If it's your time, you won't get up to pray. But if you need to go to the bathroom that feature time, do you get up? Let's be real. Nobody would be like, it's just too comfortable.
Right? Cuz cuz y'all aren't five years old anymore.
Right, hopefully.
But, but it's federa time. And you would get up to use the bathroom, just because you don't want to wet your bed.
But you won't get up to pray. And sometimes we'd get up to use the bathroom or go back to sleep.
So there's a problem with us. The problem with us is we are very, very, we are very good when it comes to the needs of the body. We're very good at taking care of the body, we feed the body, we give oxygen to the body, we take care of the you know the needs of the body. But we are not good when it comes to the needs of the heart and the soul. we neglect those. And you know why? That's tragic. Because what happens to your body? After 100 years,
every single body in this room, what happens to it after 100 years? It becomes part of the dirt right?
What happens to your soul?
It stays it remains and it goes to the grave.
So you have two entities one that is lasting and one that is perishing. And which one do you take care of?
You see our problem? Which one are we taking care of? And which one are we neglecting? We're taking care of the one that's going to the dirt and we're neglecting the one that's continuing to forever
this isn't to say you shouldn't take care of your body. But this is to say that we've lost the concept of priority.
And I'm going to give you one funny example to prove this on Ramadan.
What happens if you miss fetch in Ramadan?
Yeah, he said it right freak out. I'm missing fetch that in Ramadan is the end of the world.
Can someone kindly tell me why?
Because you missed a hole.
Right? I mean, at this point, you're in tears like you'll literally start crying. You wake up you see the sun and you're like,
right.
So so like hold on to that for a second. It's the end of the world when you miss Vegeta normal done. One month out of the year. It's the end of the world. Then eight comes around.
And for 11 months out of the year you miss fetch
No problem.
Right? You see the sun, you're just like,
I'll pray later. You see the problem.
We are traumatized because we miss a meal for our stomach. But it's no problem if we miss a meal for our hearts, like, that's fine, no problem. This proves that we have a serious issue when it comes to the needs of the heart versus the needs of the body.
We are taking care of what is perishing and neglecting what is lasting.
So our body needs oxygen. What else does our body need?
water and food, right? What's the food and water of the heart and the soul?
Again, it's a ticket. It's a law, quota and the connection to Allah through the remembrance of Allah. The first and foremost is the Salah. By the way, Salah is the first thing you're asked about on the Day of Judgment. And the prophets I sent him said, if a person Salah is in order, then they will have succeeded. And if it's not in order, then they will have failed. So don't think that this path, this path of spirituality, or God can ever be successful without the salon. The salon is number one. And when I say the salon, I mean the salon on time. I don't mean the salon whenever I feel like breathing. Okay, because when the doctor gives you a prescription and says, you know, sir,
Ma'am, I'm sorry, you have cancer, and here's your medication. And you need to take it five times a day, and you need to take it at these exact times, or else you die. Are you going to take it or you're not going to take it? Or are you going to be like You know what? I'm busy right now, let me just take all five doses before I sleep.
Right? It's not convenient for me to take my medicine right now. It's not convenient. No, you're not gonna do that. Because it's a matter of life and death, right? Life and Death of what the body,
life and death of the body. What about life and death of the heart?
What about that? A law has given us a prescription in the salon, and it's meant to be taken at a specific time. And believe me, Allah knows what he's doing. He didn't tell us what is between this time and this time without a purpose. Okay, so we have to follow the prescription for it to work. And it has to be as it was prescribed. Make sense? That's number one. And that is the oxygen of the heart. That is the food and water of the heart. Alright, number two, that's two things. We need oxygen. We need food and water. All right, number three. Would anyone say I don't need to take a shower today? Because I did that last October.
Yeah, that'd be problematic. Can someone tell me why?
Cuz we got this thing called sweat and dirt that constantly builds back on to the body. Right? You can just take a shower once in the year. Oh, I did that in Ramadan. I'm good.
The heart is the same way. You can clean the heart once and say I'm good to go. You don't take a shower once in SAM good to go. It's constant that you have to take a shower because you're constantly getting dirt and sweat on the body. Similarly, the heart constantly gets dirt on it from sin from your sins. And how do you clean the heart? What's the shower of the heart?
Is default Yes, it's Yes. And you you you you are cleaning yourself of sins When you make will do as well. But overall, it's it's default or Toba? It's repentance. When you repent, you're cleaning the heart. You can't just do it once you can't take a shower once and then say you're good for the rest of the year. And you have to constantly be seeking forgiveness. So it's default and Toba is a consistent practice for a believer who wants to take care of their heart. Just like you take a bath. You keep cleaning the heart with Toba and is stiffer. Alright, so we have three. We're breathing, we're giving food and oxygen and we're cleaning. Now there's a fourth aspect. Suppose you're
breathing you're you're giving your body oxygen, you're giving your body food and water and you're cleaning your body but every single day you go and play in the dirt.
Or you go out in the cold and you have no jacket or you go in the heat and you have nothing to protect yourself from the sun, what's going to happen.
You're going to hurt your body you're going to burn your body and you're going to make your body dirty again right? So you have to also protect the body. That's why we wear clothes. That's why you know we wear coats in the in the cold. That's why we don't run or we don't roll in the dirt is because that's gonna make you dirty again, huh? Right sustain
Same thing with the heart. See, I can't say I'm taking care of my heart butts every single day, I'm, I'm putting my heart in an environment that's full of dirt. When you are in a
when you're in a bad environment, when your environment is not reminding you of Allah, but taking you away from a lot, that's like rolling in the dirt.
Because Bad Company is like poison for the heart.
And when you don't guard and protect your heart, it's as if you're pouring poison into the heart. Does anybody know what are the guards to the heart? Think about this for a second. Suppose you have a really, really
valuable jewel, and you want to protect it right? And you put it in your house. Now imagine if you take that jewel, and you just put it out in the open in the middle of your living room floor. And then you leave all the doors open and all the windows open. And then you come home and you realize it's been taken. Well, whose fault is that?
You left? You left? open all the doors, right? This isn't how you take care of a jewel, is it? Nah, you put it inside of a safe inside of a very, very, you know, secure room. And then you lock the doors. You lock the windows, you put a fence you put a security system. That's what you do to take care of valuable things, right? Your heart is like that, jewel, it's very valuable. Because by the way, whoever controls the heart controls the body.
That's why the prophets I send them says, You take care of this. You've taken care of the body in a fungicide the model in the body, there's a lump of flesh, either solid, or solid, just Sudoku, if it is set, right, the entire body is said right? We're either faster than faster than just the colo, and if it's corrupted, the entire body is corrupted and our health club indeed it's the heart. So this jewel, whoever controls it controls the rest of your life. So it's pretty serious. You got a garden, you can't leave the doors open, you can't leave the windows open. And you know what the guards you know what the windows to the heart are, you know the doors to the heart are just we have
a couple of them by the way.
This is one of them.
The eyes, your eyes are a window and an opening to your heart. When Allah tells us to lower our gaze to guard our eyes, he is telling us to guard our hearts. Because what we look at affects the heart immediately. It's like you look at the haraam, you're pouring poison into the heart.
You listen to the hot arm, you're pouring poison until the heart guarding and the tongue. So guarding the eyes, guarding the ears and guarding the tongue are guarding the doors and windows to the heart.
You have to guard them in order to protect the heart. And the other thing you have to do is you have to you know this the security system around the fence, the protection around the heart is in your Vic. How many people have heard of this collection called historian Muslim, the fortress of a Muslim. It's a collection of what of God. It's a collection of. And it's called fortress of a Muslim because it is a fortress that you put around your heart. It protects you. It protects the heart. So you're the kind of protects your heart, guarding your eyes, protects your heart, guarding your ears, protects your heart and guarding your tongue protects your heart and guarding your company protects
your heart, who you hang around with, and most importantly, who you take as your closest friend. The prophets, I seldom said that a person is on the dean or the way of his closest friend.
And on the Day of Judgment, one of the things that people will say who are who are being punished, I wish I had not taken so and so as a friend.
Because he led me astray.
This is what friends can do. So keeping that in mind is part of guarding the heart. So we said there were four things and I'll just summarize them in sha Allah. Before we end we have to give oxygen to the heart which is the remembrance, food and water which is also the IQ and Remembrance we have to clean the heart which is this fourth and repentant repentance and we have to protect the heart which is guarding the eyes, the ears, the tongue, and the company according holy Heather was stuck for a lot he welcome in our phone Rahim. subhanak Hello behind dark shadow in that Isla Highlander stuff Rockaway to blue lake.
Sounds like we'll take some questions if anybody has any questions for Sr. Yes, me
This is a very good point that of course we need the guidance of Allah. And no one can get to Allah without Allah. This why For example, when we say in Fatiha every single day, 17 times a day at least we say he can Abu where he can sustain you alone do we worship and You alone do we seek help from. And the point here is that we can't worship Allah without the help of Allah, this is very true. And even if a person is able to worship Allah, this is a gift from Allah. So this that's something to acknowledge. And actually part of arrogance that happens when you do become self righteous. One of the causes of self righteousness is I think it's because of me, right? I'm righteous because I'm
awesome. And that person is not righteous, because they're not quite as awesome. And instead of me being grateful for the fact that I was able to get up and pray, I'm proud of myself. And that's because I take credit for it. And so that's a very, very important point that yes, indeed, that it's because of it's a gift from Allah hidayah itself means gift. It's gift and it's guidance, right, because Hidayat is a gift. guidance is a gift to same word. All right. So guidance itself and yes, he says, a lot taught Adam the words in order for him to repent.
Yes, Allah subhanaw taala we cannot get to him without his guidance. At the same time a lot is most just and Allah gives his guidance to those who seek it. So it's not that i i can say, Well, you know what, God didn't guide me. So I didn't get it for federal It's not my fault. You can't say that either. Because we have to seek out you know, we say what do we say to Allah? Yeah. Can I Buddha? Can we say he did not sit autumn stuck him? We are seeking that guidance every day. We we begged him for it every day. So it's not that we're just sitting and doing nothing. And then we should expect that Allah should guide us, pull us out of our bed at fetch, force us to get up and pray. Right? No,
we seek the guidance. Allah gives us the guidance, and that's a gift from him. But we have to strive for it. And Allah says, Whoever strives in our way, then we guide them. Whoever strives, we will give them guidance, but striving that Mujahidin is part of part of this equation. Okay? We have to strive and seek that guidance and work for it. And I'm going to give you a hadith which gives us this idea Allah says, when you take one step towards him, he does what takes 10 towards you, but how did it start?
How did it start? You took one step, right? It didn't say Allah takes 10 steps. You only got to take one after that. No. You took and then yes, and then if you come walking, he comes quickly. But what did you start by doing? Walking? So you see that even in this Hadith, it begins with something you're doing to strive to go towards Allah, even if it's small, but what is the lesson of this hadith that Allah will increase it, that Allah will respond with many, many fold more than you
Put in, but you need to put something. You need to show a law you need to put forth effort. You need to show a law that I am trying. And when you try, then Allah increases you and multiplies. He doesn't give you in, in proportion to what you give. It's not a fair exchange. We don't buy gender with our deeds. We can't pay full price for gender you fill me We can't even receive the loss of a line of send them says nobody enters gender by their deeds alone, except that Allah will have mercy. Right? And they said even you also the line he said even me, so if anyone's deed was going to buy them Jenna in full it was going to be rasulillah. So I send them right. But even him he needed the
mercy of Allah meaning meaning we need a big, big, big clearance. You know, we can't pay for it. No matter how many deeds you have. It doesn't pay for agenda and full. Don't think you deserve Jenna. All right. Don't think all but I worshipped you all this time. I deserve Jenna. You know, there's a hadith that says that a man comes in he's asked, do you want to be judged based on your deeds or based on Allah's mercy?
So he was like, a really intense worshiper. So he said, my deeds, you know, like, I got this, because he was like, he lived his life worshipping Allah. So they put all his deeds on one side, and put just one single blessing that Allah gave him the blessing of eyesight on the other end, it will it outweighed all his deeds. He said, oops, oops, no, no, no, by your mercy by your mercy.
That's the problem that yes, we do our deeds. That's our one step. But Allah does 10. You know, it's not like we it's not like, we should be arrogant and think I'm awesome, right? But we should put in some effort. It's just that tiny bit, and then a lot comes quickly towards us. And Allah helps us. But we have to put in that effort to
any questions. Other Other questions?
Yes. He mentioned about how do we take his companions?
What What would you say for those relationships that you can't book out that are negative for family, for example? Just Can you address that? Yes. Right. No, I get your question. Sure. So I'll repeat the question. First, she says that you talk about the importance of keeping good company, and that bad company is a poison of the heart. What about company where you can't avoid it? Because perhaps it's family? Very, very good question. Number one. In general, we try to keep good company. But in some cases, it may not be fully avoidable. Maybe it's just the family you're in or the environment you're in, you cannot escape it. You know what you do? In that case? You fortify your
heart? More, more? Remember what we said? What is the fortification of the heart, Vic? If so a person in that situation needs to just put a lot of fortification on the heart so that the effect of that poison and in essence doesn't affect the heart as much or it blocks that effect. Increase in dick.
It's kind of like if you have to go outside, it's really, really cold. You got to bundle up more. Right? Okay. Other questions?
Don't all talk at once.
Yeah. How do you make that step forward? Like what practical steps to get like, you know, maybe some of the poison.
Alright, her questions, a good question, which is, how do you take that first step, basically, right? How do you take that step forward? To start to get rid of the poison to start to like, you know, I want to, I want to take care of my heart. What's the first step?
Usually, this is the advice I give people in like a setting like this. Here we are, we just talked about the heart and relationship with a love for, you know, 40 minutes or so. But what happens when we go home? How do we implement it? My advice is this within yourself, and this is something no one else will know about. You make an intention, that there's something in your life that you're either going to start doing for the sake of Allah, or give up for the sake of Allah. And you make that intention right now, and you stick to it and you do it. That act is very powerful, because it serves as that first step that Allah talks about in the Quran, in the Hadith. When he takes when my servant
takes one step towards me, I take 10 towards him. So make an intention.
intention that no one else is going to know except you and a law, about something that you're going to do for the sake of a law that you're not doing now, or something that you're going to give up for the sake of a law that you're doing now, that's displeasing to him, or both. And you make that intention right now, while it's fresh in your mind, this idea.
And then you do it. And Subhanallah it's amazing what you see the effect that that has on your life, it creates a momentum, because Allah says, If you walk towards me, I come running, I come with speed. If you take one step, I take 10.
So you make that intention of that being your step.
Thank you.
Okay, so you're she's talking about cases where someone's not someone you care about, I'm assuming, I mean, you see somebody who's doing something bad, or is not doing something they're supposed to, while you shouldn't judge is you're saying, but you should also care. And for that I give the example of you're standing like, next to a cliff. And you see someone you love running full speed towards the cliff.
And maybe they're wearing blindfold. They have no idea what they're doing. They don't realize they're about to jump off a cliff. So what do you do? Well, there's one way to react, which is not my business, and just go home? Well, that's pretty heartless, isn't it? If you see someone who's hurting themselves, and you know that they're hurting themselves, it's not about judging. It's not about being self righteous. It's about caring. Right? It's about caring about them. And so when you approach that person, you have to approach them from a place of concern, not a place of arrogance. That's the key. The problem that we we find, and even when you give no see how when you give advice
to someone, the reason that people become defensive, is when they feel from you that you're not doing it from concern you're doing because you think you're better than them. Right?
And if you come from a place of not arrogance, but love and concern, like No, I just don't want you to come off the cliff, like I don't want you to kill yourself. I don't want you to throw yourself into fire. Of course, I'm going to try to stop you not because I'm better than you. I mean, I probably do worse things. But that doesn't mean I'm going to let you throw yourself in the fire. You see. So it's really an issue of compassion, not an issue of arrogance, not an issue of self righteousness. Because what you have to realize is you are not perfect.
But does that mean I'm not going to care when when my loved one is throwing themselves in a pit of fire? Of course, I'm going to care. And so yeah, it's really has to do with what's what's in your heart when you approach that person? Is it arrogance? Or is it love and concern?
practical ways to build that is like two things that I that I think if I had a bit ago, Sally who recommends Rahim Allah before giving, they'll see how one is bring to mind your own sense, like your own flaws. And what that does, it's not meant to stop you from giving the advice, but it's meant to humble you while you're giving the advice. So you're coming from a place of humility, not a place of self righteousness, because you're remembering your own flaws. And you're in a state where you're humble. And you approach them in humility, not in arrogance. And if at that point, you can't bring up your own flaws, you got a worse problem than they do.
Because if you can't know your own flaws, you can't even think of your own flaws, then that's total self deception and arrogance. That's a really serious disease. So you have a big problem. Number two, is gratitude. I said first, you bring yourself to remember your own flaws. So you humble yourself. The second is you, you show gratitude, because it is only by the favor of Allah that you are not worse than that person.
It's not because of yourself. It's not because you're just intrinsically awesome. It's because the law protected you and you should show gratitude for that.
It's like you know, your Salah is not a gift from you to Allah. It's a gift from Allah to you.
You're not doing a lot any favors by getting up and pray Believe me. He doesn't need you to pray. He doesn't need you to pray. You need you to pray. You need you to pray.
He doesn't need you to pray. So we have to thank Allah that we were able to pray,
not ask Allah to thank us, like we're not making him rich, you understand? He's making us rich. By allowing us, the greatest honor is to be added to Allah. Oh Buddha, like I said at the beginning is the greatest honor for Allah has honored you with obaldia you need to thank him, and you could never thank him enough. This is the greatest blessing is to be able to know a lot. The blessing of Islam.
Any other Okay, last? I think it'd be the last one. Yes.
Yeah.
Of course, of course. I think the question that she's asking was specifically about protecting one's own heart. But in terms of praying, definitely praying for that person, advising the person as we just spoke about now, in a way that that is one of you know, love and concern not in a place of air, not from a place of arrogance, making to offer the person definitely, definitely.
That being given showing kindness will is likely to soften the person's
I see. Okay, yeah. So trying to encourage them through positivity. And yes, definitely some people, especially kids, you know, like one of the things is like to motivate kids. You it's, it's very, it's very powerful to use positive reinforcement, right, like to encourage them about the good that they're doing in order to encourage them to do more good. So yes, that's very true. And you being positive and encouraging can help people change and become an improved, Yes, true. I'm not saying you give up on people, definitely. This is why I said you see someone running to a cliff, you don't just turn around and say, it's not my business, that's a heartless thing to do. You should if you
care about someone, you're not going to just give up on them, you're going to try to help them and you're going to try to stop them from hurting themselves. But you still remember you're not perfect, they're not you know, it's not, they're not mutually exclusive. I don't have to be perfect in order to advise them to the person. I'm advising you because I love you and I don't want you to hurt yourself. But I'm not claiming I'm perfect. If everybody had to be perfect first before they advise another person, nobody would ever be able to advise anybody. We would all just stop caring about helping anybody because well I'm not perfect. So let's just let everybody run off of cliffs you
know?
Any other Yes.
So that's similar to the question where she was asking about family when you're in an environment that you cannot avoid that is not a good environment that's why you have to armor up more you're going to have to put more protection around the heart so you would you would you would be protected more if you have more Zik more quote on more of God throughout your day more do more is to thought this will make to hedge with more Salah those things are going to make you stronger just like I said you know if you're going out in it's really cold outside you can have to put on more layers and that will protect you.
Yeah, and also guarding the eyes is going to be very important. guarding the eyes guarding the ears guarding the tongue and armoring the heart.
Okay, are we good? Okay, so pontica la banda shawanna illa Helens esta Federico a to boil Lake while also in an insane and if you host lol Idina aminomethyl Sunny Hattie with also unhappy with the loss of a sub. We have a couple more books that we just brought. So those who didn't get a copy, can Chela get one Santa Monica.