Yasir Qadhi – Domestic Violence If You See Something, Say Something!

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			And hamdulillah All praise is due to Allah, the One and the unique. He it is when we worship, and it
is his aid that we seek. He is the Lord of the oppressed, and he hears the prayer of the week as to
what follows a second and disconnected topic, but it needs to be addressed as well, brothers and
sisters, and the last week in this country of ours, there have been a number of cases of domestic
violence that have led to the deaths of a number of our sisters across the country in Chicago,
before this in Houston, and in California and other places as well. And this is a sad reality, and
almost a taboo topic that needs to be addressed. And unfortunately, it is becoming not very common,
		

			but it is even one is more than enough. And even if it doesn't lead to death, still, the amount of
abuse taking place within marriages, it needs to be addressed head on. And in this few minutes that
I have remaining, I want to just bring up some simple points. First and foremost, brothers and
sisters, brothers in particular. And of course, abuse takes place both ways. I know this, but
statistically, statistically, it is women who are abused by their husbands more than the other way.
And statistically, it is men who are more battering to the women and statistically it is men who
murder their partners or ex partners, their wives or ex wives were the ones to divorce more than the
		

			other way around. So this whole book does is not meant to neglect that it goes the other way. But
the emphasis should be on the default. And that's going to be the next few minutes that I'm going to
do. First and foremost brothers men realize that Allah azza wa jal will ask you about your
relationship with your spouses and your children. The Prophet system said in the Farewell Pilgrimage
HOLD button Wada, the fair he had a few weeks left to live, and he gave the largest hutzpah that he
ever gave in his life. It's only five paragraphs read that you all know it. An entire paragraph is
dedicated to protecting women. 1/5 of the whole battle WADA is meant for women and he said to the
		

			men, he's speaking to the men, it Allah Finisar be conscious of Allah with regards to your women and
wives, be conscious of Allah because you have taken them in the name of Allah and you have had
relationships with them using the name of Allah subhanho wa taala. You will be asked about them be
conscious of how you treated them. And in the very final days of his life, one of the last sermons
one of the last Hadith that we have mentioned, is that he said to the people fear Allah when it
comes to the women fear Allah when it comes to the women, we have to answer to Allah subhanho wa
Taala more important than the law more important than any culture or our family and friends, every
		

			single husband is responsible in front of Allah for what happens in the privacy of the house, and a
person who raises his hand to beat a defenseless woman is no Gentleman and this is what our prophets
Allah said him himself said, when women came to complain about why husbands beating them, he gave a
whole book, you can read the Sierra, he gave a whole book and he said, these women have come
complaining about their husbands. These men are not the best men amongst you. That's not the role
model. I should have the Allahu anha said never in his life did the prophecies and raised his hand
against a woman never in his life. So please, brothers, don't quote me, books are fake and what not
		

			the role model is the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, you want to be a true gentleman. You want
to follow the Sunnah Do not raise your hand against the defense this lady point number two our
sisters who are in this situation and also all of us here. Understand that we need to we need to
destigmatize the concept of divorce. One of the main reasons why such women remain in marriages is
because they think low carb Ganga What will people say, and we need to eliminate this Jai Hindi
mentality. Your life dear sister is more important than what people will say. And your honor is not
based upon a marriage to your husband is based upon your relationship with Allah subhanho wa taala.
		

			So if you have an abusive husband, if you have a husband that is being an animal to you, then don't
worry about what the people will say that Sharia has granted you the option of divorce and you go to
your local sheriff, you go to your elders and you tell them the reality so that a divorce can be
solved between you do not remain in a situation of abuse. When the red line has been crossed, then
you do not renew
		

			Ain't it that situation? And if a lady leaves a marriage because of this, then there should be no
stigma on her. There should be no issue of taboo that she has a divorce lady No. On the contrary, so
many of the Sahaba and the Sahaba were divorced and they would marry divorced ladies, we have
culturally made divorce into a stigma. Yes, we don't jump to divorce for the slightest reason I
agree. But when there is an abusive situation when her life is threatened, when she is being beaten,
then there is no concept of Iza for the husband and sanctity of the marriage, she should leave that
marriage and get a divorce. And any Islamic Courts or Shediac court is going to give her a divorce
		

			because of this issue. Point number three brothers and sisters, point number three when it comes to
this reality of abuse. All too often. We men are aware that another man amongst us has this nature,
we know that he's abusive to his wife, but we don't do anything. And that is honestly a silent
approval of that action. What do you expect a lady to do when her husband's treating her this way,
except that his family and his cousins and his friends get involved? It is our collective duty for
that key fire when we know somebody is of this nature, that we get involved and prevent this from
happening. In fact, there is no stigma in even publicizing this and people who are like this abusive
		

			in nature. If they propose we should go and tell that from the oh, this person he beats his wife you
should know that. You're looking at me as as if this is something strange hadith is in Behati Fatima
vintage lace came to the process. And she said so and so and she gave the name so and so, gave me
the hit buffer Nica. She wants to marry me. Our Prophet system said no, he is a man known to beat
his wife. Heidi doesn't boy howdy. Look at our culture contrasted with the Sunnah. He told Fatima
you shouldn't marry this man. This man is the abuser. This man he's known to beat his wife Subhan
Allah, are we going to be more strict than the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, there is no
		

			sanctity and honor to a man who is a serial abuser. Such a person, if he proposes it's our
collective duty. Now, I'm not saying there is no salvation, perhaps a person repents, but at least
the past should be known so that he is monitored so that it cannot lead to a stop for a lot a type
of murder or something of this nature. And the final point that again, much can be said, but time is
limited to final point. You know, they have a motto here in this country after 911. They said if you
see something, say something, we don't agree with that motto when it comes to stereotyping Muslims
and whatnot, it's a completely false motto. But when it comes to marital abuse, it is 100% accurate.
		

			If you see something in your family and friends, if you see a woman being abused, if you see your
cousin or even your cousin's wife, because generally speaking, who is privy to this type of
situation, it is the relatives of the husband, generally speaking, who covers up the crime, it is
the friends and relatives of the male brothers, men be actual men. And if your brother or your
cousin or your friend is beating his wife, then where is your manhood when another woman is being
violated? And you just sit there and turn the other way? If you see something, say something, get
involved, bring your wife have a console that you have a reconciliation, see what is the reality of
		

			the situation. And if the law needs to get involved, then if getting involved saves a woman's life,
then we'll law he opened up the door and call 911 and say this man is physically abusing his wife
and it cannot remain and continue in this fashion Muslims we have a collective duty Wallahi It is
shameful It is shameful that story after story is coming in our national media about Fatima so and
so in Mohammed, someone's on a show so and so do we not have a sense of Lea of the religion? How can
we allow this to continue? So collectively, brothers and sisters, we need to step up to our
responsibility and monitor our family and friends. And if we know of such a case, do your best to
		

			become actively involved and minimize get involved make sure that this doesn't get to the point of
it becoming an Islamic or haram. Yes, arguments happen. I'm not speaking about that. But abuse is
not an argument raising your hand or leaving a bruise or broken bones. That's not an argument. So
when you see the red line has been crossed, and the Shetty eye does not allow this type of abuse,
then you cannot remain silent. So if you see something definitely don't just say something but get
involved and collectively final point brothers and sisters, as a community as a community. We have
to have domestic shelters for women who are suffering abuse one of the main reasons why such women
		

			remain. They say Where can I go, I don't have a place my family's back home. He is treating me this
way. And that is why it is for okay fire on us to have women's shelters to open up places where when
we when we know of the case of abuse, we can tell the sister and her children, look you can go there
for a few days. We'll take care of you until we figure out you know what is the next step and so
large communities like Dallas and other major cities, definitely we need to have multiple such
shelters of our faith community Wallahi it is sad and I've had cases like this where our city
		

			sisters go to Christian shelters where our sisters go to other shelters where hijab is an issue. You
know? veiling is an issue, what not why? Why don't we have enough wealth to take care of our own. So
this is another tactic that needs to be done. And the bottom line, we're raising awareness. I can't
give all the solutions now, but we have to raise awareness and stop this topic from being taboo. The
sanctity of our sisters lives is paramount here. And there is no desire for a criminal. We don't
cover up the faults of a criminal more important is to protect the innocent women. May Allah
subhanho wa Taala allow us all to do so Allah many aminu Allah Allah than if you had the Jambi them
		

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Islam and Muslim in Ebisu in Nigeria who have enough to watch out did me wrong feet at bat Jaco yo
yo Aziz Roberta law in the law to either Amara can be eminent by their behavior enough say within
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			as the Melkite in Idema in Allah Allah Allah Allah, Allah Allah Allah Nabi yeah you heard Adina
Amanu Sallu alayhi wa sallam with a steamer Allahumma salli wa salim Mubarak well and I love the
closer they come Mohammed why the early he was like big marine rebels Allah in the law to either
yeah moving idly while you're standing with the orba while you're in Halifax yeah fascia you will
monitor your body you're either looking to the Quran or the Corolla Haleema come watch crew Yes.
What do they call white Allah Akbar welcome is Salah.
		

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