Yasir Qadhi – Ask Shaykh YQ #111 – The Ruling of Teaching Students of the Opposite Gender in Islam

			The next question I have is from Sister najwa. She does not mention her location, she mentioned that
she is from a land where typically, women do not teach at co educational schools where the schooling
is gender segregated. However, she has now moved to another land, where co education is the norm.
Her profession is a schoolteacher, and now she is feeling you know, shy that am I able to teach in
such a situation there will be boys and girls over there. And she is not accustomed to teaching
boys. She's only accustomed to teaching girls. So she asks, Is there any Islamic prohibition for her
to teach young men given that the culture that she's now in is co educational
		

			107.
		

			In
		

			New he him first.
		

			The response to this, the issue of intermixing of the genders, the intermixing of men and women is
one that the Shetty eye has some guidelines. And then the shediac allows the rest of it to be
dictated by culture, this is a very important point. In some aspects, the shediac takes complete
control. And it will tell you do this and don't do that. In other aspects, the Sherry, I will be
silent and culture will dictate. And in some, there's a little bit of shady and mixed with the rest
of it will be culture and intermixing of the genders is one such area where the shediac has some
guidelines, and then the rest can be culture sensitive. In other words, if you fulfill the sharee
		

			guidelines, the rest is going to be dependent on the culture of the land that you live in. And so we
have for example, from the Shetty up when it comes to intermixing. When it comes to men and women
interacting together, we have some very simple guidelines, and of the most important guidelines, as
the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, Let no man enter upon a lady whose husband is absent,
meaning he's gone on a journey because remember, those days the man would go for many weeks or
months on end. And so the lady would be left alone in the house. So the Prophet system said, Let no
man enter into the house of somebody who has gone traveling and his lady or his wife is there, you
		

			know, absent from her husband, except that he has another man with him. So nobody should enter the
house of a lady. So for example, somebody has to deliver some food somebody has to deliver
groceries, somebody has to service something of the house or something. So nobody should enter in
alone, there should not be privacy, there should be somebody there that is also with the person so
that everybody maintains a decorum and a proper a characteristic. Also, we know that the city has
forbidden Hollywood and Hollywood means that a man and a woman that are obviously not related to one
another that they are alone in a place that nobody has access to. So a closed room or something of
		

			this nature. This is considered Hollywood, the show he also has guidelines. With regards to dress
with regards to interactions, both genders have to be dressed appropriately. both genders have to
act in a dignified manner, avoid flirtatious talk, speak in a manner that, you know gives the sense
of gravitas and decorum that is appropriate for our religion of Islam, because we all understand the
reasons why these laws have come is that we protect the institution of marriage, we do not open up
any doors of evil. Now, given all of these laws beyond this, how much can the two genders interact
and mix together? For example, can you know families that come together, couples friends come
		

			together? And they're sitting together on the same dining table? You know, various friends and their
you know, husbands and wives all come together? And they're sitting at the same dining table?
Believe it or not, this is culture sensitive. And I know for some of my viewers, they've never heard
of this that why is this question even being asked. And again, the more you travel, the more you
live in different cultures, the more you understand that different societies have different norms.
For example, in more conservative lands like Saudi Arabia and other Gulf states, it is very, very
rare, almost unheard of, for genders to be interacting together. And that in and of itself is
		

			neither Islamic nor an Islamic that is the way that that culture is, frankly the Sahaba if you look
at if you read this year, if you read the books of early Islam, the Sahaba had a level of
interaction that was definitely more than the level of interaction that takes place in many of the
Gulf countries in our times and public in the marketplace. In the bazaars in the massage it men and
women knew each other by their first names and they would address one another in public and ask a
question that needed to be asked. There was no shame more harm in doing that. In our times in those
societies. It is completely taboo. It is unheard of that a person is going to address somebody
		

			outside of his or her immediate family. And again, I'm not
		

			Saying That's right. I'm not saying that's wrong, I'm simply telling you status quo that is the way
that it is in those lands. And what I am saying the shady allows cultures to take charge and to, you
know, go sometimes when the more segregation will say between genders, and sometimes on the less
segregation as long as its barriers are met. And in fact, this difference goes back to the very
beginning of Islam. And it goes back to the cultures and societies in the early days of Islam. In
the famous book, the more thought of Mr. Malik, which is the earliest book of Hadith that has been
written or one of the earliest books of Hadith. In my mighty guide 179 hedgerow, in the multimatic,
		

			a man asked Mr. Malik, that basically, can a man and his wife sit with a guest and entertain them on
the same dinner table basically, right. So basically, somebody has come and you know, the wife and
husband are sitting there, and can they eat together partake of the meal, together, any magmatic
set, there is no sin, there is no heritage, there is no problem in this as long as it is the custom
of their people to do so. And in Medina, at that time, it was the custom to do so it wasn't an issue
that men and women, as long as they're dressed appropriately, they're sitting on the same if
obviously didn't have a table tables came later on, but they're sitting on the same area, and
		

			they're sitting together to eat now. Mmm, I didn't humble heard or read this anecdote from your mom,
Maliki Mohammed was in Baghdad, this is 100 years, you're a little bit more than 100 years later. So
Mr. Mohammed, read this anecdote, not quite 100. But you know, about eight years after this. So your
mom heard of this anecdote, many decades later. And he read of this, and he was in Baghdad, and in
Baghdad, because of the culture and because of the wealth. And by the way, another issue generally,
it's not the rule of thumb, but generally speaking, the more wealth and the more privilege that came
in those societies, the more segregation was possible. And the you know, the more rudimentary type
		

			of lifestyle, you know, it didn't allow for that type of segregation. So but that is not the capital
of the world, not just the Muslim world. It is the political and intellectual and economic capital
of the world. It is the largest city, the wealthiest city by the time, Mr. Mohammed bin Salman. And
so Mohammed herder read of this, and he was the generation goes to a job, he was amazed, he was
astonished, like, wow, Mr. Malik allowed this, because in his time in his place, it was unheard of
that, you know, men and women would sit at the same place that were not related to one another, and
then partake of that meal. So in my mind, understood, that's a different culture and in our culture,
		

			and above that, that is something that is not going to happen. So this is something that does vary
from time to place to culture to civilization, and therefore, as long as the Islamic rulings are
met, which is appropriate interactions, appropriate dressing, you know, everything is that the
Sharia has asked no halwa. All of this is done. The rest, as we said, is culture sensitive. So this
lady, the sister asks our sister, Nadia, I'm assuming she's coming from a gulf country, because
that's really generally where core education is completely segregated. And now she is living in a
land where it is now not segregated. So she's asking, Is there a shelter a prohibition? And the
		

			response is that there is no shelter, a prohibition per se, as long as she is dressed appropriately.
And interactions are shallow, I'm assuming obviously, we'll all be done in a manner that is dictated
by the idea in and of itself, there is no such a problem with men and women interacting in public in
a dignified manner. That having been said, and by the way, your mama No, we mentioned this in his
book much more. Remember? No, we mentioned that. And that is because a lot of men and women, the
mixing of men and women, is not how long in and of itself, as long as it is not done in Hollywood,
as long as it is not one man, one woman mixing in the privacy of one's or you know, being alone in
		

			the privacy of a house or something, then this is not something that is held on per se, there's a
minority writing this, that there's nothing wrong with many women being in public together and
tracting together in public, it that's not how long per se, that having been said, I must also point
out that in me Having said this, I also have to add the caveat, which is that plenty of studies have
shown that especially you know, in the adolescence phase, that it is in fact better for young men
and young women to be separated during the educational process. It is in fact far more conducive for
a better academic environment, it is more conducive to study to higher grades to concentrating. And
		

			that is understood that that is an age from especially from the age of let's say 13 to 18. And even
beyond this, that that is an age where you know you're you're you're bringing together you know two
opposites that are definitely going to attract and it does have its share of dangers. Now, of course
this is not to address your particular question, sisters.
		

			measure what because you are not in control of the society you're in. I'm merely pointing out that,
especially for my audience that finds this question, you know, strange or troubling. And I do have
members of our audience that are also from all sides of the spectrum, where, you know, sometimes the
question itself is too liberal or too conservative whatnot. And, again, I'm somebody who's trying to
cater to many different audiences here. And my point is that I understand you problematize the
question, oh, my God, how can somebody asked about such a simple question, of course, gender should
be interacting together. And my response is that, well, that's the society you and I have been born
		

			into. That's a society where the concept of gender segregation is almost unheard of, dare I say,
almost nobody of the next generation can even imagine a society where genders are pushed to not
necessarily just be together where there should be a natural segregation, if not an actual
segregation, which is enforced in some Gulf countries, the Sharia, without a doubt, would suggest
some form of natural, healthy segregation when there's no need to be intermixing. the very notion of
gender segregation, the very notion of having men and women not necessarily completely integrated
with one another is alien to many people who are listening to this question because they've never
		

			imagined or seen or visualized a society where that is possible. As somebody who's lived in both
types of societies where gender segregation was harshly enforced, and where there's complete
intermixing. Let me tell you, honestly, there are definitely very major pros and cons. In both of
these, there's no question about that. There's major pros and cons. It's not that simplistic. And
the point is that, we also need to understand that there is a lot of good as well. And perhaps, and
perhaps the good is far more than the bad, where there is some type of segregation that is there.
And we see this in simple statistics of our society and our time and our place. It is estimated that
		

			according to some latest surveys that up to 60% of teenagers have high school we're talking about
high school, up to 60% of them are engaging in premarital *. This is an America that is a
staggering statistic. You're talking about 17 year olds, 16 year olds, and more than half of them
are engaging in premarital, what do you think is going to happen? What do you think that's going to?
Cause? Is that something that is healthy or not? And by the way of that, you know, around 5% or so
are actually, you know, in middle school, also, basically below the age of 13. There are beginning I
mean, what is going to happen when you have daily, you know, interactions between the genders at
		

			this age and the you know, the hormones are just coming in? Is that something that is really the
wisest or not so all of this having been said, The sisters asking a very specific question, and I'm
saying it is highlighted and permissible, I still point out that we should also understand that it
does have a lot of wisdom. And even if some things might be permissible, it's permissible to
interact in public with the opposite gender, still some amount of healthy segregation where we have
without going overboard because again, we you know, definitely have to take into account that a
harsh segregation does is counterproductive in a society where that segregation does not take place.
		

			And I've spoken about this in other areas in issues, but again, to be very clear that in lands where
gender segregation is unheard of, to try to force, a very strict segregation within our communities,
and within our massage, it is completely counterintuitive and counterproductive because it
especially given the technology and whatnot, it's not going to achieve at school, rather, what I'm
suggesting is a healthy and organic segregation. And that's something that every community should
come together and have a very frank discussion, a very open discussion between various gender, the
two genders and various segment age segments as well. Very important. You bring the young men and
		

			women you bring the elders, and you have a frank conversation that okay, should we have a barrier or
not? For example, should we have this and that, for example, in the time of the Prophet salallahu,
alayhi wasallam, many women will be entering from one door, and overridable hottub rhodiola. One
suggested, he said, a messenger of Allah, why don't we assign that door to the woman and that door
to the men and the process of readily agreed? So here's that organic segregation, where why should
men or women be jostling and shoving through the same door, if they're able to they weren't able to
or that I didn't, didn't come in the beginning, if they're able to, let's say, have two separate
		

			doors. We know that in the time of the Prophet sallallahu sallam, there was not a physical barrier,
but the women were at the back and the men were at the front that's unnatural. and healthy.
Segregation is not something that is enforced by a wall. Rather, it's you know, and in fact, it is
authentically narrated that a lady was having trouble hearing what the process of them said. So she
leaned forward and she said, you know, dear brother, may Allah have mercy on you. What did the
Prophet system say? And the brother leaned back in and answered or he said, such as this an
authentic
		

			In Muslim America than others that that is that I couldn't hear what the President said. So I lean
forward Is that me? Allah have mercy on you. Can you tell me that shows that there's just a barrier?
I mean, not a barrier, a space between them, but there was interaction going on. And there's nothing
wrong with that. Why should there be something wrong with that? So my point being the the sister is
asking a question, the response is very straightforward that it is in fact, not problematic at all.
That having been said, it raises the broader question about gender interaction, and it's still out
what is called an Arabic Escalade. And the response is that in and of itself, as you know, we said,
		

			an amount of intermixing is natural and a part of society in and of itself is not held on.
Nonetheless, one should be aware that the Shetty does understand that just unbridled mixing, let's
say does is not something that is healthy, it is not the default. And we should try our best to be
reasonable and disregard that given the circumstances of society take into account the norms of
rashidiya and have a middle ground in our communities and our massages and a lot subhana wa Taala
knows best