Yaser Birjas – TaSeel #46 Q&A

Yaser Birjas
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The speakers discuss the importance of learning about the Islamic culture and the shaving of the baby's head, as well as the use of haniq in cultural practices. They also touch on the negative impact of divorce, domestic violence, and custody during the waiting period. The speakers emphasize the importance of seeking marriage during these times and avoiding being affected by proud moments. They also mention the concept of time and the importance of not being affected by a proud moment. Finally, they discuss the importance of giving charity and not being overdoing it.

AI: Summary ©

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			Or we have,
		
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			Hajj session.
		
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			So those who are planning to go to
		
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			Hajj, Insha'Allah, may Allah
		
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			facilitate that for you, Abilalamin,
		
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			and make it easy. And for those who
		
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			are planning, may Allah, subhanahu wa ta'ala, give
		
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			you the opportunity
		
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			sooner than later, you Rabbi Alamin. So those
		
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			who would like to learn more about inshallahta'ajj
		
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			and what to do, what to expect, join
		
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			us insha'Allah this Saturday after salaat al dua'ala,
		
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			insha'Allah, wu'ala. Miss Mila.
		
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			Questions.
		
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			Do the parents have a preference of the
		
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			name over the parents the prophet named his
		
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			grandchildren?
		
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			Now, here's the thing. There is no Islamic
		
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			tradition in terms of yanid. This is the
		
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			obligation that you have to let your grandparent
		
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			the grandparents choose the name for the children.
		
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			There's no really religious obligation from that perspective.
		
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			Like I said, it's wa'ashirunna bilmaruf, treat them
		
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			kindly.
		
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			And also, part of a treatment,
		
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			in our society is the prophet is commanding
		
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			us and
		
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			goes
		
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			both ways. You So, it goes both ways.
		
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			You need to ask,
		
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			You Anir Rahma for the for the younger
		
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			ones
		
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			and and have also, respect for the older
		
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			ones. So, if the older ones and the
		
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			elders, they would like to give names
		
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			and the names are reasonable,
		
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			I mean, why not? Shouldn't be an objection
		
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			to that, inshallah, but Islamically speaking the obligation
		
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			is for the father,
		
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			the father of the child.
		
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			Does that make that the grandfather,
		
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			which means the father of the father, has
		
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			also higher obligation upon that? Some other mothers
		
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			say, yes, they do,
		
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			and others say, no, it's actually the immediate
		
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			father who has the
		
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			obligation to or actually the responsibility to name
		
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			the child. So it's a matter of keeping
		
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			it, Wa'ashi ronabu Maruf, treat them kindly.
		
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			Is there any basis for saying both Adhan
		
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			in the right ear and Surat Al Fatiha
		
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			in the left
		
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			ear? I don't know about Surat Al Fatiha,
		
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			but I know that there's the the the
		
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			iqama in the left ear, but we said
		
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			that this is actually comes from a very
		
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			weak narration, so it doesn't stand yet.
		
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			If someone reverts as an adult,
		
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			should they also do their aqiqa?
		
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			I mean, if they want to,
		
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			go for it. And I think you should.
		
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			Just like an adult who was born Muslim,
		
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			if you know that your family never did
		
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			a aqiqa for you, you should actually do
		
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			it for yourself as well too.
		
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			So, what should we call it in this
		
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			moment, Yani? If you're already 50 years old,
		
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			masha'Allah. What we're gonna call that? Still aqiqa.
		
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			Can the Aqika be done in another country
		
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			back home,
		
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			like passed as charity or more preferred locally?
		
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			Jema Al Aqiqah is not giving charity. Al
		
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			Aqiqah is celebrating the birth of a child.
		
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			So you celebrate the birth of a child
		
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			usually is within the local area where the
		
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			child was born. However, if you want to
		
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			send it to your family so they can
		
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			celebrate with the uncles and cousins and everything,
		
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			fine, do it. It's not a matter of
		
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			charity, Ajamal. It's not a matter of charity,
		
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			it's a matter of celebrating the child. So,
		
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			therefore,
		
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			however, the aqiqah is slaughtering the animal. What
		
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			are you gonna do with the meat? That's
		
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			your business.
		
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			But it's always better to celebrate the birth
		
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			of the child
		
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			by having a local maybe dinner or party
		
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			for people to come inshallah and attend
		
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			without any extravagance obviously.
		
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			The name Baraka, naming the child after Aymar
		
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			Radiallahu Anha,
		
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			Like when the prophet says Afla and Yasar
		
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			and and Baraka, it's not like it's haram
		
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			to name them that. He says
		
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			avoid this better for you because if someone
		
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			ask, hey, is Barakah at home? No, Barakah
		
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			is not
		
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			home which means there's no Barakah at home,
		
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			Anastafurullah.
		
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			So avoid that's what it means when the
		
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			prophet says avoid that.
		
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			Shaving the head of the newborn.
		
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			Actually, in the, subcontinent
		
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			women tend to shave or culturally actually,
		
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			culturally in the subcontinent,
		
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			women tend to shave the head of girls
		
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			thinking this will make their hair thicker.
		
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			The shaving head of a newborn girl is
		
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			permissible. I know it's not permitted for women
		
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			to shave their head.
		
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			Well, I don't know about thicker, that's that's
		
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			your business. I don't know, but I know
		
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			when it comes to shaving the head of
		
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			the child it doesn't matter if it was
		
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			a boy or a girl.
		
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			And we said earlier that the purpose for
		
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			this was hygiene.
		
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			Didn't have that what we have today in
		
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			hospitals and that's why some contemporary scars, by
		
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			the way, they say, you don't have to
		
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			shave.
		
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			Because again the purpose of it is to
		
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			just to make sure the child is is
		
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			clean, is yani, is well taken care of,
		
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			so again it's hygiene.
		
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			But to continue with the example of the
		
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			prophet
		
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			as he did in the community, yeah, shave
		
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			the child's head whether it's a boy or
		
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			a girl and it should be fine inshallah.
		
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			And by the way, that's around the 7th
		
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			day.
		
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			But if you're gonna now say, my daughter,
		
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			she's 5 years old, should I shave her
		
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			head because we we skipped that, you know,
		
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			5 years ago? No.
		
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			Too late for that. We're done with this
		
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			now.
		
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			Is Taniq and Adhan in the right ear
		
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			of the baby from the recommended Sunnah Act?
		
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			Also, the salaam of the prophet was blessed.
		
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			Is this something we can, delegate to a
		
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			righteous person although they do not have the
		
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			same blessing? Well, I'd rather actually take the
		
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			liability of that person
		
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			and keep the parents do that inshallah for
		
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			their children.
		
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			As for tahannik and adhan, some alama, they
		
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			say, actually, these are cultural practices from the
		
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			Prophet in terms of tahannik.
		
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			It was a cultural practice, not necessarily
		
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			religious practice,
		
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			although the the practice of the sahaba and
		
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			the prophet approving it makes makes it part
		
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			of the tradition of the prophet so it's
		
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			okay to do the haniq. The adhan was
		
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			mentioned, had Abu Rafa, as we mentioned, when
		
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			he saw the prophet
		
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			reciting the adhan in the year of Al
		
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			Hasan Ibn Ali.
		
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			Man, somebody wants to do summary of all
		
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			the actions that we do after the child
		
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			is born. Go to the book of Al
		
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			Qayyim Rahim Allahu Ta'ala, Tafat al Maudud fi
		
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			akham al Maud. You'll find everything there insha
		
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			Allah.
		
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			How much can the next spouse, family,
		
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			ask about the previous divorce, especially in case
		
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			of domestic violence and so on?
		
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			I mean, you have the right to ask
		
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			and they have the right not to answer.
		
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			So, it's at your discretion at the discretion.
		
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			It's a case by case. It's not a
		
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			matter of
		
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			like you have to tell me and I
		
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			have to know. There is no such thing.
		
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			It's up to you how much you wanna
		
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			know because sometimes what you know is gonna
		
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			be disturbing
		
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			and sometimes, you know, it's a private matter.
		
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			It didn't work out. Khalas, alhamdulillah. We went
		
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			separate ways. If someone worried that this person
		
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			might have a case of domestic violence and
		
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			so on, you can go and check online.
		
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			Check the name if in public records so
		
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			you might say something and if you worry
		
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			about it, ask the people around and then
		
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			in this case if you wanna insist to
		
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			know, it's up to you.
		
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			That doesn't mean that they have to give
		
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			you all the details,
		
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			So, here Western laws, have,
		
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			inequity towards men. In our society I have
		
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			heard that divorces,
		
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			very much
		
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			very much give more rights, especially over children,
		
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			to the women
		
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			and this ends up keeping men hostage by
		
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			the system. Is this true in reality and
		
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			any guidance on this matter? There is no
		
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			doubt there is no doubt that the the
		
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			system here is unfair really. When we come
		
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			to look at it from a Muslim point
		
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			of view, there's no doubt about it.
		
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			Yes, in many many cases unfortunately it's more
		
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			biased, you know, in,
		
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			for women, in favor of women in regard
		
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			to these matters but I've seen other cases
		
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			where it's completely opposite.
		
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			So, it really depends on how good your
		
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			lawyer is, unfortunately, Anna, and how much money
		
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			would it to to lose and keep spending
		
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			on this matter here. So, that's that's how
		
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			it works, a law must stand.
		
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			Does the talaq get annulled after reconciliation
		
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			and counter and counter reset
		
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			or does it still count and after reconciliation
		
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			you are now left with one more talaq
		
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			and reconciliation?
		
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			I don't know if I understand the question,
		
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			but if you mean by after divorce,
		
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			you get into the idda, the waiting period.
		
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			During that waiting period, you need to decide
		
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			to reconcile
		
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			and return back into the marriage reinstate the
		
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			marriage
		
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			or keep it moving until the Ida is
		
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			over and the marriage is nullified, khalas.
		
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			So, if you wait until
		
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			the Ida is over like you wait for
		
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			the 90 days for example
		
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			and there was no, there is no intimacy,
		
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			which means there was no *,
		
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			and the man did not say, you know
		
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			what, I want I want to reinstate the
		
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			marriage back again.
		
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			If these
		
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			neither one of them happened during those 90
		
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			days,
		
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			the divorce is valid
		
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			and the marriage is over
		
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			and it counts strike 1 out of 3.
		
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			So, if they remarry again,
		
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			then she doesn't have to go to marry
		
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			somebody else.
		
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			So in this case, she married again but
		
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			with one strike out of 3. However,
		
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			if she marries somebody else
		
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			and then that marriage actually doesn't doesn't go
		
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			well and they divorce again,
		
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			can we can she marry the the her
		
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			first husband again?
		
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			She can. But is she gonna carry strike
		
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			1
		
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			or is it gonna be nullified?
		
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			That strike 1 is nullified right now because
		
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			she already married somebody else. So, when she
		
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			married her ex husband,
		
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			she now married him as she still have
		
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			3 actually instead of divorce now.
		
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			Can you please clarify the hadith and turmidi
		
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			on the authority of Ubay ibn Kab who
		
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			said the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam encouraged him
		
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			to make his whole dua spent on
		
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			salawat and all his concerns will be taken
		
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			care of,
		
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			since forgiven, but also,
		
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			what was mentioned today about ask Allah for
		
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			everything. I've been confused on this.
		
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			Well, look, spending time and saying, saying salawat
		
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			upon the prophet is differently virtuous,
		
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			and sometimes as the prophet mentioned to Ubay
		
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			ibn Kab, like if you do that, Allah
		
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			will
		
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			answer your call and you'll for hammukh, that
		
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			your ham, your concern will be taken care
		
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			of by the salawat of the prophet
		
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			salawat So when you make your dua, send
		
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			salawat upon the prophet salawat and then ask
		
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			for your needs. So it's always within the
		
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			dua itself, inshallah, you can make the salawat.
		
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			Again, another question about seeking marriage, ask about
		
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			a potential spouse, about past marriages,
		
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			why they got divorced. Once again, you have
		
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			the right to ask, they have the right
		
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			to say, I can't tell you. It's a
		
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			private matter right now, khalas. So it's up
		
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			to you how to accept their their answer.
		
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			In Jannah, will we still have the concept
		
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			of time? Yeah. Let's go to Jannah and
		
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			then we worry about this there.
		
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			Allah says, it's gonna be eternity, time is
		
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			is irrelevant over there. There is no night
		
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			over there jama'ah.
		
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			Like, really it's going to be day all
		
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			day?
		
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			Yeah, it's because it's all pleasure and enjoyment.
		
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			You don't go to sleep. I'll keep enjoying
		
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			it.
		
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			We don't have that concept of time over
		
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			there. No.
		
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			No.
		
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			Question about the Asil classes, if this is
		
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			going to continue throughout the summer.
		
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			Honestly, not all of it because, inshallah, if
		
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			you go to Hajj bin Illah, that's at
		
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			least 3 weeks, we're going to be off.
		
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			Now, in terms of the formal classes might
		
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			be might stop, but the students, inshallah, they
		
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			have their own programming together.
		
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			If you didn't have the right knowledge at
		
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			the time of naming your child
		
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			and have given them a name which isn't
		
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			disliked, but also doesn't have amazing quality as
		
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			the as the meaning. Just an average meaning
		
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			name. Should we change that?
		
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			Well, it's up to you if it's still
		
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			a young young young child and it doesn't
		
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			harm to change it if you want to
		
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			change it something better
		
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			would mutually acceptable by the parents of this
		
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			Alhamdulillah.
		
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			Otherwise, it should be okay inshallah.
		
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			Is there a mention of female circumcision in
		
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			the sunnah?
		
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			It wasn't something common for the people of
		
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			Mecca That's why when the prophet came to
		
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			Medina, he noticed that Atiyah from the Ansal,
		
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			she was do that, called kifar in the
		
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			Arabic language. So when he heard about it,
		
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			he goes, don't be excessive.
		
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			And it was actually a common tradition in
		
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			that area but not necessarily,
		
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			for the people of Mecca. It wasn't common
		
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			in the Arab tradition.
		
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			They probably got that from Africa because it
		
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			was very common there at that time.
		
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			Now, is it is it healthy for us
		
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			to aspire to Allah's attributes,
		
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			specifically the the idea that you discussed on
		
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			not being affected by a proud moment versus
		
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			an embarrassing moment. Is this even possible? Of
		
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			course not, Ajima.
		
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			There's nothing like unto him
		
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			You can't even compare yourself closer to that.
		
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			However, Allah himself,
		
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			he described some of his servants in the
		
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			Quran with qualities,
		
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			names,
		
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			similar to the names of Allah Subhanahu Wa
		
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			Ta'ala. When he named Ismail Halim Un Awa,
		
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			Halim which is the name of Allah Subhanahu
		
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			Wa Ta'ala as well too. Right? Forbearance.
		
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			What does that mean?
		
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			Forbearance that is befaring a human being.
		
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			Nothing even close
		
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			to the to the attributes of Allah Subhanahu
		
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			Wa Ta'ala.
		
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			Does atalak apply to wife if she says
		
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			to the husband, like, I'm done with you
		
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			or we're over? No, it doesn't, because the
		
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			talaq is from the man,
		
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			he is the one who pronounce the talaq
		
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			to his wife. If a wife wants to
		
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			be over with that, she needs to go
		
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			through a khulah, and the khulah goes through
		
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			the court order. Yeah. She needs to basically
		
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			go to the court and have the authority
		
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			release her from this marriage.
		
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			What about weighing the shaved hair and giving
		
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			amount of gold or silver in charity?
		
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			Remember back then it was something that's easy
		
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			and that amount would be enough for people
		
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			but today that's insignificant. So, if you wanna
		
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			give charity that should be fine. You don't
		
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			have to wait anything.