Waleed Basyouni – My Father & The Mango Skin
AI: Summary ©
The speakers discuss the importance of parenting and avoiding negative impact on children, particularly in regards to abuse and divorce. They emphasize the importance of not giving up on parents' opinions and not fulfilling promises. The speakers also highlight the need for a warships campaign and small monthly donations, while also discussing the importance of peace and prosperity for everyone.AI: Transcript ©
Good
Good
Salam Mr de como Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh
waha Cubetto
a shadow
mother
all
I thought
I was
hi
Hi
All
right
hamdulillah the whole salatu salam ala Mala Baba Hoonah Vienna Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa salam, ala Houma to Sleeman, Kathira Ahmedabad or braised your old praise due to Allah and his prayers and blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad Salla Allahu Allahu Allahu wa salam My dear brothers and sisters
I want to share with you something from my childhood
we used to travel to Egypt in the summer
and in Egypt the very well known in a specific area in Egypt to the bring this delicious mango all type of mangoes you know, you name it like 5678 Maybe different types of mangoes in front of you. And you pick the most juicy one not very soft, not very firm. Yeah no mix between that green and yellowish yeah no color and it just melt in your mouth and the meat around the seed of it is so much and so nice.
I remember my father Rahim Allah
when he would cut the manga and I know he likes manga
when he will cut the manga
he will always take the skin and eat the skin
and give us the rest of the manga.
I always ask myself that golden juice of the mango and the meat of the manga
why he doesn't eat it.
We get the best of the mango and he'll always eat the skin. And one day, we asked him, Why do you eat the skin? He said, so you don't need it.
I didn't understand.
At that time, I thought he meant
something and I know my dad grew up in a poor you know, family.
My dad telling us some days you will not have money to provide dinner for himself.
Two couple of days will go by with no meals.
So I know my dad's growing up not an A, in the lifestyle that I grew up.
Sellers may be wondering, maybe this is an old habit from the old days, you know, we had like the skins and enjoying it
until the time around COVID
I remember I brought home
mangoes and it was so nice.
You know, put it from one of the halal stores here. And it was so delicious. And I was so ready
to you know, to get my revenge of COVID and get all the frustration of being home and this manga.
My daughter is looked at and said wow, that looks nice. Then I give her a piece. My other daughter asked for another piece and I gave her a piece. And my son asked for a piece and I gave him fees.
And I ended up with the skin.
And I start eating the skin.
And I have the same smile on my face that my father had
the same sense of satisfaction that he had
I realized that he did not enjoy the skin.
Eating the skin of the mango.
He really enjoy providing the best of the mango to his children.
That's what that do.
And I'm wondering over the years how many mangoes he have given us and he kept the skin for himself.
Unfortunately,
when a lot today
how children they treat their parents
how they deal with their father.
They will trust their friends over their fathers.
They were pleased the people who are strangers and care for their feelings more than they care for their parents and their fathers feeling.
They prefer to spend more time
and quality time
and kindness
with those who are not related to them over their own father and oh mother.
I seen children that they will
listen to their spouses and disobey their parents.
children live with their parents in the same city.
Same country
with a FaceTime at hand and anytime you can dial it
yet, days and weeks goes by, we don't talk to each other.
Even in the same house.
It will go to three days without having a meaningful conversation with their parents.
You know sons and daughters, brothers and sisters.
I wish I can go back in time
at that table, or my dad used to cut the mango and I will rush. If I go back in time. The first thing I'll pick will be the skin of the mango.
And if you ask me I said
I did this see don't eat it.
You deserve to eat the best of it.
A father's tears and fears are unseen.
His love unexpressed.
But his care and protection remains a pillar of a string throughout our lives.
I will talk specifically today about father
because I found that a lot of
Time that father kind of forgotten.
His right his value, the importance of the role of the father into your life.
And in Nabi SallAllahu sallam said he headed ebitdar Daffy Mr. Lima how can your father and while it your father is the metal gate of gender,
the best of gates what that means you only taking care of your father looking after your father will lead you to the best entrance to dinner.
Your father is the one who brought you to live what Allah made him the reason for you to be exist.
You carry his name for the rest of your life. And if you don't like it, then you go change his name in the court. When you die and resurrect in the biggest court and the most just core twitches in the day of judgment you will be called by your father's name, it will be set foot on new Funan it will be said so and so the son of so and so
Jabra the Allahu
Tao Raja Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa salam for cada in an email and well well then we're in Abbey do manly man came to get us Allah I have a children I have family on our money. But I have kids to care about their future needs. My father needs help he needs money
and he took something to fulfill his need not he took for a luxurious he took from my money for his neat maybe a food or a meal. And he came to the Prophet sallallahu Sallam to complain about his father
fucka Calhoun Nabi SallAllahu Sallam and to a man who can be you and whatever you possess, belong to your father.
You can't come in and go to court suing him because he took a meal from you or took
money that he needs.
If it turned me the man, Abdullah Hebner Amerindian Astra they allow Nabi SallAllahu sallam said and Sunnah Tirmidhi in real Allah medieval while we're in the Sahel Paula and Sahaba divided. When your father is pleased with you, Allah is pleased with you. When your father is angry with you, Allah is angry with you. But here it is important to keep in mind his anger, if it is for the wrong reason,
it will not count.
If him pleased with you for the wrong reason, that will not count.
It is for the right reason for the appropriate reasons.
And I was wondering why Father, often forgotten
when we talk about fame burden, while again, we're all talking about dutiful Dear parents will always think about Mother mother's mother Mother, which is absolutely no problem.
But if and sometimes we have this menders misunderstanding that, or we think just because the Prophet SAW Selim, when a man came to minister, Dr. Rasulillah meant her happiness in the history, so habotai, who is the one who deserve my best form of companions and kindness, he said, your mother then said, who then who mother, then who mother, then who he said father and the fourth one.
Some people think that that means the father is not important. This heavy is not to say that the Father is not important, this hadith to show you how important the mother is, and the mother have loved three levels above the Father because of three things father cannot do. Number one,
your mother carried you and heaven
number two, delivery, number three breastfeeding.
And that's why she was three times prefer because these three things, they cannot share it, the mother supersede the Father.
You might say the father has spent money some mother or rich can work and make money. So in any other situation, you will always find them can be equal. But these three things make the mother very special. But what's what's wrong is to think that this hadith undermine the rights and the value of the Father. As a matter of fact, not a single time Al Quran is speak about parents, and he mentioned mother by itself or father by themself. They are always together, and he should leave when he while he dake were Bill Wiley, they near Santa, it's always put them together.
No referring one over the other.
You know those who are so nice and kind to their mother, and they don't care about the Father. I like those who pray but they don't give zakat like those who fasted Ramadan but they don't pray the daily prayers.
doesn't work this way. I find sometimes people kind of father forgotten or have been, you know, undermine his rights. When the father is involved in Haram things. Some people told me chef my father is facet is bad. He doesn't pray. He doesn't do this. He doesn't do that he did with haram. He lies he's bad character, blah, blah, blah. I said, Yeah, okay, Allah subhanaw taala said in the Quran and the LT. Allah said in the Quran, if your father is a Kaffir, and there is not word, there's no word of sin and Cofer. That's the worst sin ever committed in the face of this earth. If he's a Kaffir, Allah subhanaw taala ordered you to be kind and good to him.
Not only that, Allah said, we're in Jaha, Dhaka and Tisha he can be managed Allah can be here and not only that, he is a not a believer. No, no, he is also an abuser and religion. He want you to stop worshipping Allah he force him putting pressure and making all these taking means to stop you from being good Muslim.
That type of father Allah said
live with them in kindness
wasa Hebrew mafia dunya Makarova be in the company not to abandon them not to avoid them not to cut them off
also sometimes we feel our father are tough
so many times I didn't like my what my father used to like me to father when he is firm about things no it means no, you can go you can stay late. No this person you can go to their homes. No, you can wear that no you do that and that they are affirming you know, I know sometimes annoying. Sometimes it makes sense sometimes doesn't make sense. Sometimes it makes sense later on on time.
But what I want you to know that they should not be whatever it is the reason should not be the reason for you not to be connected with your parents, especially your father. Be patient
be tolerate your father
to what if he's abusing me?
It's level if they're abused, reach to a level that it is harmful not safe. You leave the house you go to a safe space
Yes, there is some monsters father's this special case. But not just monster because he told you you know what? I'm not gonna get you a new car.
Your father is not a bad man just because he said I'm not gonna get a car for high schooler
he's not a bad father just because he tells you you know what I can pay for your this you know? Fancy whatever gift that you want.
Sorry, you have to live with the PlayStation four. I can't offer five yet. All my father is monster.
It's not fair.
You could the ambassador the Allah and Mammon Muslim Allahu Akbar, one for us to be who am I Sunita Hema Illa Fattah Hala Hala who Berbanding Melton, not a single Muslim have two parents alive.
Both my parents passed away and many here will share the same with me.
So if you have an ambassador if you're a Muslim and you have your parents both alive, everyday in the morning, Allah Obon to big gates and Jenna to have them wide open.
Same thing in the night.
If they are pleased with you, and if they are not you giving them hard time you make them angry. You fight with them, you disobey them you disrespect them, you challenge them.
Allah subhanaw taala closed these two doors in Jannah and open two doors in Hellfire for you every day and every night.
That's what number said.
As I said so many times we can have misjudged our parents. We think that they are bad, they are wrong. They didn't get it right.
You know it's funny
and unfortunately the society make it so normal.
I don't understand that.
You don't understand me that. Really?
You didn't know.
I know better.
You know, I said just wait.
The older
I get the smarter my father seems to get
if you get that
sometimes we
we angry at father because he's not there.
We're still connected to mom because she's always with us. I don't see him much. He's always busy. He's working, traveling. Yeah.
But I want you to know something I learned in my years as growing up.
Every time I remember this, yes, sometimes
when my father's don't have my hand,
I know that he got my back.
I know if he's not with me today. And he's traveling because he wants to provide for me that mango.
When you work hard, it means a lot. So you can have the comfort lime that you have.
By the time you realize that maybe your father was right. That's usually when you have a son, who's saying you're wrong.
One of the reasons I feel fathers banded and treated bad in the case of divorce.
Immediately you line up with the father with a mother. And that's wrong. I'm not saying Mother Father, especially if the divorce take place. All what you tried to do to reconsolidate to help if you can, if not, you don't you don't. Even if you're not assume the father is wrong, but so many times you didn't know because you didn't know the history. You didn't know what's between them.
You have a right toward your father, if you feel your father is abuser in the divorce, advise them. Tell them this is not right. This is not correct. And it doesn't mean that you cut them off.
Oh, my father married another one. I'm getting an angry at you and father, you can give that advice whatever you want. But that's not a justification for you to be bad, to cut him off, to pray, to curse to use bad language
and the worst
when the mother turned the sons and the daughter against their fathers, it's one of the worst thing that's mother is a body man is a transgressor as It's haram for the father to turn its children against his mother. It's haram for her to do the same.
To sad when he treats that parents when their children will be fight in the courts, suing their their fathers and taking them to court is one of the worst form of error Welcome to validate your personal bursary. moonta Halle Potter Yeah, the worst form of this obedience disrespect, cutting ties with your parents, and your Coonawarra need to casually suka in the salon, that you and your father set against each others in front of the judge.
I mean, if it happened happened, I'm saying this because I seen some cases where the divorce case then the mother tell the children come on and testify against your father when will exaggerate things. Now your role should not be that don't lie Don't you know that has helped help, but didn't remember that your father and your mother have rights upon you. Your role is to advise to make dua for them. Wait until things cool down.
May Allah Subhana Allah make us among those who are good to our fathers? May Allah have mercy on our fathers? According to Mustapha Rolando.
hamdu Lillahi wa salatu salam ala Allah whenever you about the word
in the little Deen
any one of the
manifestation of not understanding of religion correctly
that someone especially righteous people, people who tried to do good think that doing an act of warships a volunteer act of warships are more important than pleasing their father
or their parents in general.
Can you imagine in the time the process alum the war the geometry sebelah watch can better than
to defend the process Salim to defend this lamp. He said yeah rasool Allah I want to come to fight with you. Then in there be so Salam said how about your parents? Are they okay with that? He said, No. They were crying that I left him. He said go back to them and make them laugh as you made them cry. That's much better than joining my army fighting with me die as a shaheed.
What do people think that you know what, being involved in DOD or doing this or doing that on the expense of abandoning the parents
on the expense of not fulfilling their parents right. You have to say deepness of yen, not a single time I was praying a volunteer prayer, and my father called my name unless I cut my salah immediately and answer him.
I'll not finish the salah.
But it's volunteer prayer.
It is nice when you see your son help you.
It is sad I asked about this.
This young graduate I know the future is big in front of you. I know your parents maybe don't need your money. But you know what it means a lot. When you just make money and you say that you know what? This is 5000 this 10,000 this is a new car. I'm giving it to you. hamdulillah last month Allah gave me money.
And there is another hope for those parents who abused the role and abused their children. But that's not my talk today. Talking about you initially do that. You know that his kids work and make money. They have a full time job. And still the parents pay for their phone bills.
Pay for their insurance, for car insurance. They still pay for their you know daily expenses.
If your father millionaire father, even if he is but it's about you as a son you doing this as showing your appreciation to him. You should pay for his if you can.
And one of the thing if you know your parents in debt, you pay off their debt and you don't show off and you don't make it as a favor to them.
Make dua for them
you know and say hello Behati they've been ambass said that site of nearby double the Allahu en a hub and he said his mother passed away. Then he came to the proxy Salam said Yara salah, my mom passed away and it wasn't here to take care of her I was traveling. I feel guilty that I did not fulfill her rights in the end of her time.
You think it will benefit her? If I donate something on her behalf? I like to be on her calendar I'm kind of in new Shizuka inherited the RAF sada Catherine Alia. He said I used my witness jasola That my farm the one who produced the most of dates the one who makes the most of money. I made it for my mom so that means it's sadaqa jariya every year this basically fruit comes sales goes on her behalf
my brother and sisters
in the Bisola Salam said the parents gender will be elevated and they will say why what do we do they said nothing but your children made to offer you minister for free and that's what elevated them in Jana
maybe
today you can do something nice to your father.
Once I got this beautiful message
from my daughter
says Dad
I know you have loved me as long as I have lived.
But I want you to know that I have loved you all my life.
Just nice. You don't need to be so eloquent lines like that.
But something express what you feel.
Just say to him, thank you.
The chef today really told me that and if he passed away make dua for him.
And say Allah, I want to thank my father for all what he did to me.
I'll never forget that Facebook picture of a brother next to his father. And he was mashallah tall and father short. And you wrote a very nice caption underneath of it. He said that no matter how tall I get, I will always look up to you.
As expressions
is so important.
Just a nice word sadaqa
I just told my son in my way here, hey, I don't like this or my daughter. You know, I said I don't this one my opinion I don't like it immediately he took it off.
That's a good deeds. That's something Allah reward you for it.
Even though I like it. You know what I do this from for Allah to please him.
Finally, I want to say
fathering is not something perfect men are perfect men do.
fathering is not perfect. Or it's not something perfect men do that for sure. It's something that perfects the men.
Now let's find out and make us good fathers and make us more thought and make us good to our children. Last Fidel accept our deeds. May Allah forgive our sins. May Allah make this a blessed year for all of us. Allah make it easy for our brothers and sisters in Lhasa and Philistine and in everywhere we're we're bloodshed and
unrest as May Allah bring peace to the world and mega last month Allah bless us with good leaders who will make us live in safety and prosperity and moral society. Around here and around the world. We ask Allah subhanaw taala annually alleged Muslim in an era home when you meet are now at home sharara now sharara Home Alarm and Dennis Minnesota who dealt with took our alfalfa Aleena la 19 Unfortunate Aqua Keihan to humans aka Allah Allah for Allah Allah Dena Allah humble for reality now here Amata Allah for Allah Hama Hama Hama Wi Fi my Wi Fi NUMA but I couldn't use it on my autofilter Nikita Raja to him either Judah economic or Sapna Dara Rahu Maha Mata Allahumma salli wa sallim wa
barik ala Nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa salatu salam ala
ala Allah Akbar Allahu Akbar, a southern Allah
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