Umm Jamaal ud-Din – Navigating Interactions With The Opposite Gender

Umm Jamaal ud-Din
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The National Imams Council discusses the importance of navigating gender interactions in Islam, with men being aware of the rules and guidelines and teaching them about the etiquette and adab. The sharia's guidelines include avoiding sex, being associated with any type of sharia, and not being associated with any type of sharia. privacy and boundaries between men and women are emphasized, with the success of their book on the natural rhythm of men and women being discussed. parents are advised to be mindful of one's outfits and makeup to avoid sh trading outfits, and the success of their book on the natural rhythm of men and women is also highlighted. The speakers emphasize the importance of learning to lower one's attention to others, avoiding outfits and makeup to attract women, and maintaining healthy relationships with children.

AI: Summary ©

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			All praises are for Allah, we praise him,
		
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			we thank him, we ask him for his
		
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			help, and we ask him for his forgiveness.
		
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			We seek refuge with Allahu Ta'ala from the
		
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			evil of ourselves
		
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			and the evil of our actions. Whoever is
		
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			guided by Allah, then no one can miss
		
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			guide them, and whoever is misguided, then no
		
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			one and whoever is misguided, then no one
		
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			can guide them except for Allah.
		
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			I bear witness that there is no God
		
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			worthy of worship except Allah, and I bear
		
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			bear witness that
		
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			Muhammad It is final messenger
		
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			Ahmed. First of all my dear sisters, Assalamu
		
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			alaikum
		
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			May
		
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			Allah reward you all for coming out. It's
		
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			very cold. May Allah reward you, you know,
		
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			increase your reward inshallah for coming to the
		
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			houses of Allah
		
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			to seek
		
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			knowledge
		
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			and, you know, to seek coming closer to
		
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			Allah
		
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			through this gathering of remembering
		
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			Allah
		
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			I thought I'd take the opportunity
		
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			to first of all
		
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			introduce myself because some people might not know
		
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			me. So my name
		
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			is
		
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			and
		
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			I am actually a qualified member of the
		
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			National Imams Council.
		
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			I am actually originally a revert to Islam,
		
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			but I went on a more than 25
		
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			year journey to seek knowledge starting in Saudi
		
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			Arabia.
		
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			And, you know, I first learned the Quran.
		
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			And
		
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			then after that,
		
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			came back to Australia and got a degree
		
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			in Arabic and then went on to study
		
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			from scholars.
		
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			And then after that, alhamdulillah, I finished my
		
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			my bachelor in Sharia and then alhamdulillah, I
		
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			mean my final year my final year of
		
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			a masters in I mean
		
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			So
		
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			I feel very very passionate about what I
		
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			do
		
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			and, alhamdulillah,
		
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			some of you may know I teach sharia
		
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			classes and I do have them available online
		
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			if anyone is interested,
		
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			who would love to study with me. That's
		
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			my passion. So inshallah, we we can talk
		
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			about that later.
		
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			But what I wanna get into now is
		
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			the topic that we're here for,
		
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			and that is
		
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			the topic on navigating
		
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			navigating
		
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			gender inter interactions.
		
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			Now
		
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			what we can see,
		
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			this is a tricky topic for a lot
		
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			of people
		
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			because
		
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			what we find is, in general,
		
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			people tend to go to 2 one one
		
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			extreme or or another.
		
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			Okay? So
		
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			you have the ex I have heard of
		
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			ex I have heard of some some situations,
		
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			and I'm sure we've all heard of situations
		
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			which are very extreme,
		
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			okay, in a way that they think that
		
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			there should be gender interaction where,
		
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			for example, it could be that, you know,
		
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			they don't even allow a female to go,
		
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			for example, to the just to the post
		
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			box to get the letter from the mailbox,
		
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			you know, things like that. Okay? Or saying
		
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			women should not study at school. They should
		
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			have no education.
		
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			Okay? So this is, like, the the one
		
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			extreme you can find.
		
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			But then you have the other extreme extreme
		
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			as well, which we see, unfortunately,
		
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			happening a lot in, you know, the Muslim
		
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			community, especially after a lot migrated to the
		
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			west
		
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			where, you know, if you go to the
		
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			universities
		
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			or you go to
		
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			the schools
		
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			and and even in the households, not just
		
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			in the university and in schools, let's not
		
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			just blame the youth. It starts often with
		
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			the adults
		
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			where there's just absolute free mixing. You know?
		
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			Like, there's no boundaries at all. Like, there's
		
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			no that it's like, people have lost their
		
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			whole
		
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			the whole moral code of Al Islam.
		
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			Right?
		
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			So this is why it is so important
		
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			that we actually
		
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			teach
		
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			the next generation
		
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			about the etiquette
		
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			and the adab,
		
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			you know, the the manners
		
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			that, you know, that Allah his messenger has
		
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			has taught us.
		
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			We need to pass that down. You know,
		
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			we shouldn't be that influenced by the West
		
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			that we completely lose all of our morals
		
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			and standards as Muslims. Right?
		
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			Now
		
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			one thing we have to understand is that
		
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			the the rulings in Islam
		
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			are not there to make life hard.
		
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			That's not the objective.
		
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			Actually, the whole sharia
		
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			is all based upon
		
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			bringing maslaha,
		
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			like it's all about bringing benefit and welfare.
		
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			Like, everything that Allah has ordered us to
		
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			do is for our benefit and that we
		
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			benefit personally from that. And anything that Allah
		
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			has made forbidden is something harmful.
		
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			Okay?
		
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			And we have to always remember that
		
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			as Allah
		
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			says in Zulmulk,
		
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			Doesn't Allah
		
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			know best
		
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			that which he has created? And he
		
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			is. Like, he is the most subtle and
		
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			the most aware. So he he's our creator.
		
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			So he knows best what is the best
		
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			system for us to
		
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			operate under.
		
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			Now obviously,
		
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			Islam is a religion
		
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			that goes in line with the fitra of
		
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			human beings.
		
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			Like, Allah created us upon certain instincts,
		
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			and Islam will never tweet or do something
		
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			that goes against that natural instinct. Okay? It's
		
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			so obviously,
		
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			Islam recognizes that it's something normal and natural
		
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			that there's gonna be attraction between opposite genders.
		
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			Like, that is something totally normal. Allah
		
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			created that, put that in us. Why? To
		
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			continue the human race.
		
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			Like, if there wasn't attraction between men and
		
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			women, people wouldn't even be bothered to get
		
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			married. Right? And then the whole human race
		
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			would come to an end.
		
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			Okay? So that's why you see that
		
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			Islam does not go against this natural inclination.
		
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			Okay? Islam does not go against this
		
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			natural in inclination,
		
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			but what it does is it sets
		
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			down guidelines
		
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			in order to regulate that attraction. Right?
		
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			And to channel that attraction in the in
		
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			the halal way, which obviously primarily is through
		
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			marriage.
		
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			Okay?
		
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			Because you have to understand what is also
		
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			what is the the society
		
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			that Islam wants to generate? Okay. So it's
		
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			not just see, often when we think about
		
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			the the akham
		
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			in the sharia, like, often we think about
		
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			the rulings in sharia, we just think about
		
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			ourselves, like how it affects us. But you
		
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			don't realize that the are not they're just
		
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			there for ourselves as the individual.
		
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			They're there also for the society.
		
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			Right?
		
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			So what Islam wants to generate
		
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			is a chaste and pure society.
		
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			Right?
		
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			Unlike
		
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			and we know firsthand the difference. We live
		
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			in Australia. I'm from a non Muslim family,
		
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			so I know exactly what's on the other
		
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			side more than maybe what some of you
		
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			do. But I'm sure if you've got you've
		
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			gone to a public school or you've been
		
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			to a university or you've got workmates, you
		
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			would have a very good understanding
		
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			by now
		
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			that the society of the disbelievers is very,
		
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			very different than the society that Islam calls
		
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			to. I mean, this society is honestly, it
		
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			is just it's become worse over the last
		
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			obviously, like, I compared to say my grandmother's
		
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			generation
		
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			then to my mother's generation and now how
		
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			it is now.
		
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			Like, fornication,
		
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			the dinner is something absolutely it's become so
		
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			normalized,
		
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			you know.
		
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			Uncontained lusts and desires. Like, it's all about
		
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			just, you know, do whatever your lust tell
		
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			you to do. Act on whatever your lusts
		
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			tell you. No matter no matter how perverted
		
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			that could be. It's you know?
		
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			So this is the society that basically with,
		
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			you know, with the disbelievers, this is their
		
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			society is is is contaminated with that. Right?
		
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			And we have to understand, subhanallah, just like
		
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			Allah purified
		
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			us with tawhid
		
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			from shirk and kuf. Right? Allah purified us
		
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			in our in our beliefs,
		
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			right, in our beliefs
		
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			from shirk and and kuf. This is what
		
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			contaminates the belief. Right? Single out
		
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			Allah alone in tawhid,
		
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			purifying ourselves from any types of shirk, any
		
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			types of association with other than Allah
		
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			or or
		
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			or types of disbelief. Right?
		
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			Similarly, Allah
		
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			wanted us also to pure he wanted to
		
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			purify us in our.
		
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			Now,
		
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			my dear sisters, does not just mean manners.
		
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			Is more comprehensive than just manners.
		
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			Means manners. It means your manners as a
		
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			Muslim, but it also means your moral code.
		
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			It means your moral code code code also
		
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			and your your character. Your character. That's akhlaq
		
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			is contained, you know, that all comes under
		
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			akhlaq in Islam.
		
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			Now if we look at the Quran, Allah
		
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			says in Surah Baqarah,
		
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			he, verse 151. He says,
		
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			So in
		
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			this verse says, just as we have sent
		
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			amongst you a messenger
		
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			from amongst you,
		
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			he is reciting the ayat of Allah
		
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			and he came he was sent
		
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			to purify you. Right?
		
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			He came also to teach you the book
		
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			which is the Quran and the sunnah.
		
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			Where you
		
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			are.
		
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			And he came to teach you what that
		
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			which you did not know. He came to
		
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			take you out of the ignorance of
		
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			to the light and guidance of al Islam.
		
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			And
		
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			the prophet salallahu alaihi wa sallam
		
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			tells us
		
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			that every
		
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			religion
		
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			has
		
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			a certain type of character.
		
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			And the,
		
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			subhanallah, the the akhlaq
		
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			of Islam
		
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			is al Haya. It is based upon modesty,
		
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			right, and chastity. That that is the the
		
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			of al Islam.
		
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			So we we can describe if we understand
		
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			it that's why it's good to understand the
		
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			whole context of what Islam is, like, the
		
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			framework of Islam. Right? So the framework of
		
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			Islam
		
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			is that it's, 1, based upon righteousness.
		
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			Like, we know that we are, you know,
		
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			Allah
		
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			has sent down the Quran and sunnah for
		
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			us to be upon righteousness, righteous deeds.
		
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			Right? Aiming for
		
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			the, aiming for the next life.
		
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			And nobility, having a high character. You know,
		
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			think about the prophets and messengers. How was
		
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			their character?
		
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			We are you know, Islam,
		
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			you know, Islam is a religion that we
		
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			are following in the path of the prophets
		
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			and messengers literally.
		
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			You know? And so if you think about
		
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			their nobility,
		
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			their, you know, their modesty,
		
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			their chastity, their high character,
		
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			that's the type of that's the level that
		
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			Allah, you know, Allah wants us to be
		
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			on that path, the same type of path,
		
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			right, as as they were upon. They are,
		
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			you know, they are our,
		
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			you know, forefathers, you could say, the ones
		
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			who came before us, but they are the
		
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			prophets and messengers. They are our role models
		
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			that we try to emulate them in the
		
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			way, you know, in every aspect, not just
		
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			in their worship, but even in their, you
		
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			know, their their no noble manners, no noble
		
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			character.
		
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			Okay. So this is why we see that
		
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			the sharia
		
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			has come with certain guidelines
		
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			in relation to the the interaction between the
		
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			genders
		
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			in order to protect
		
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			the
		
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			to protect the character
		
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			of both the individual Muslim
		
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			and also
		
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			the Islamic society or community at large. So
		
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			it's not just about protecting
		
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			your akhlaq and my akhlaq.
		
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			It's also protecting the whole akhlaq of the
		
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			of the Islamic community. So what we are
		
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			doing what we are doing
		
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			when we apply these guidelines, I'm gonna go
		
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			through very soon, it's not just about you
		
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			and me and protecting ourselves. Right? It's about
		
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			you having an active role in preserving
		
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			the high,
		
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			you
		
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			know, akhlaq
		
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			of the whole Muslim community.
		
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			That if we don't all do this together,
		
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			you know, as a as a group, then
		
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			imagine we will we will have the same
		
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			al the Bilal perversity running in the Muslim
		
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			community as you see with the disbelievers.
		
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			Where they've just got lost all all sense
		
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			of modesty altogether.
		
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			Right?
		
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			Now one of the unique features
		
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			one of the unique features of Islam
		
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			is it doesn't just forbid the sin,
		
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			but it also call calls for blocking the
		
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			paths
		
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			which
		
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			lead to sin.
		
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			That's the unique feature. Like, some some religions,
		
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			like, you know, if you look at, like,
		
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			say Christianity, for example, they might say don't
		
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			have relations
		
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			with a man before marriage, but they don't
		
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			say anything about being alone together
		
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			without without a third party. That that it
		
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			doesn't have anything like that. You understand? So
		
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			because if you don't have those guidelines, you're
		
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			gonna you're gonna end up falling into the
		
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			Haram anyway. Okay? Even if they tell you
		
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			don't have any relations with a man. If
		
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			they don't if you don't have the other
		
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			guidelines, you're gonna straight away fall into the
		
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			Haram anyway.
		
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			Islam doesn't just forbid,
		
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			you know, sins. It also
		
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			it also calls for blocking the paths to
		
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			those sins as well. Right? Why? Because
		
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			the way the Sharia looks at it is
		
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			prevention
		
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			is better than the cure.
		
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			Right? Right. If you say that in Arabic,
		
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			right, that the
		
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			the prevention
		
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			of
		
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			a sin or a prevention of a harm
		
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			is greater and easier
		
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			than when when the harm has already taken
		
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			place.
		
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			Okay.
		
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			Now if we look at what Allah subhanahu
		
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			wa ta'ala says in the Quran, for example,
		
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			he says
		
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			So Allah
		
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			says that these are the limits of Allah,
		
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			so do not approach them. So Allah has
		
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			certain
		
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			certain acts which he has made haram.
		
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			He doesn't just say he doesn't just make
		
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			that that act haram, but he says even
		
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			don't approach
		
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			it. Don't even go close to it or
		
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			anything that leads to it. That that's also
		
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			becomes haram.
		
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			Like, there's even a,
		
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			wasa irul
		
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			haram haram.
		
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			The the the the paths that lead to
		
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			haram are also haram in al Islam.
		
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			And this is what we get from these
		
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			various rulings,
		
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			these various ayaat, these various, proofs.
		
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			Also in Surat Al Isra,
		
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			Allah says
		
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			Don't approach
		
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			So he didn't say don't perf like, don't
		
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			act. Don't do
		
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			He actually says don't approach
		
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			Right? So that that shows it's not just
		
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			about
		
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			the actual act. It's actually anything that leads
		
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			to it needs to be.
		
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			You need to refrain from it.
		
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			Now there's a there's
		
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			also the Hadith of the messenger of Allah,
		
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			salallahu alayhi wa sallam which I'm gonna go
		
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			through in a little a little bit and
		
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			look at this a little bit more
		
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			closely.
		
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			But, for example, the messenger of Allah said,
		
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			So he says that
		
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			the
		
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			the eye even the eye has a share
		
00:16:09 --> 00:16:10
			of fornication.
		
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			What is the share of the eye in
		
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			fornication?
		
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			It's what it looks at.
		
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			Okay. Looking at things, I'll I'll come and
		
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			speak about it in a minute. But things,
		
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			Yani,
		
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			that that are gonna that can lead
		
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			to. Right?
		
00:16:30 --> 00:16:32
			Well, Right? That the also, the
		
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			the can commit a type of.
		
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			And what is that not not the major
		
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			act of zina, but it means that, you
		
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			know, do using the iya in a way
		
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			that Allah is not pleased with.
		
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			Right? It will take a share of zina,
		
00:16:45 --> 00:16:47
			a type, you know, because it's from those
		
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			wasa'il. It's from the the
		
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			the the paths that lead to to zina.
		
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			Okay? And I'll as I said, I'll come
		
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			back and speak about this in a minute.
		
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			Another thing the messenger of Allah said was
		
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			very interesting, subhanAllah, he says
		
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			Adam.
		
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			Every son of Adam, including
		
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			daughters of Adam too,
		
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			they will have for them
		
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			they will have for them a share in
		
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			you know, it's not nice to say, but,
		
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			like, you know, it's you know, understand what
		
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			I'm trying to say. A a share in
		
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			There's a share in it. Like, because there's
		
00:17:23 --> 00:17:25
			different levels. Right?
		
00:17:25 --> 00:17:27
			And this is something that that might you
		
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			know, it's
		
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			something that must, must occur. Okay? And he
		
00:17:32 --> 00:17:33
			goes on and explains
		
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			that the two eyes,
		
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			their share
		
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			of is looking.
		
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			Like, that the 2,
		
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			ears
		
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			Their share of is what they listen to.
		
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			And the
		
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			the tongue,
		
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			its is what it says. You you certain
		
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			words, it says.
		
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			And as for the
		
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			as for the hand, it is the touching,
		
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			the unlawful touching, obviously.
		
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			And then it goes on and speaks about,
		
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			like, for example, the,
		
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			you know, the the leg, you know, the
		
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			share of the leg,
		
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			which is going towards something that's impermissible,
		
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			and then
		
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			also the heart, which is longing, you know,
		
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			towards that thing that's not permissible,
		
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			and then And then the private part either
		
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			acts upon that or
		
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			it repels it. But what it shows you
		
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			is
		
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			that to be aware that, you know, has
		
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			its parts.
		
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			Okay?
		
00:18:54 --> 00:18:55
			Has its parts.
		
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			So that's why we need to be mindful
		
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			of these guideline of the guidelines which
		
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			al Islam came with
		
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			so that we can
		
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			Yani, you can if you understand what I've
		
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			been speaking about with regards to the framework,
		
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			this is what we need to be mindful
		
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			of the guidelines Islam came with because they
		
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			are
		
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			they are showing you what are the means
		
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			that you need to avoid
		
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			so that we stay far away from.
		
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			And as I said before, if we don't
		
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			if it's when we don't if when we
		
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			don't implement these
		
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			guidelines, when we turn away from these guidelines
		
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			and ignore them
		
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			and we don't pass them down to the
		
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			next generation,
		
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			that we are gonna see
		
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			Muslims suffering from exactly the same problems
		
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			that we see
		
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			prevalent in non Muslim societies
		
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			like high levels of, you know, promise
		
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			promiscuity,
		
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			unwanted pregnancies, you know, women getting pregnant without
		
00:19:52 --> 00:19:55
			being married. I'm already seeing that. I get
		
00:19:55 --> 00:19:57
			sisters contacting me unfortunately
		
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			and I mean despite they're Muslim and they
		
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			told me I've got a very strong practicing
		
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			Muslim brother
		
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			father and mother but it's still happening. It's
		
00:20:05 --> 00:20:07
			still happening, sisters. And they're asking is it
		
00:20:07 --> 00:20:09
			allowed for me to get an abortion now?
		
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			Okay? So we have to this is if
		
00:20:10 --> 00:20:13
			you don't face what's going on, Yani, if
		
00:20:13 --> 00:20:15
			you don't be aware of what's happening
		
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			then this is what happens. When you when
		
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			you become complacent and think it couldn't happen
		
00:20:19 --> 00:20:21
			to me, it couldn't happen to you. Right?
		
00:20:23 --> 00:20:24
			And so this is what happened. Just like
		
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			we see in non Muslim society, it's happening
		
00:20:26 --> 00:20:28
			in the Muslim society and it will go
		
00:20:28 --> 00:20:29
			and become worse if we don't
		
00:20:30 --> 00:20:31
			come back to these guidelines.
		
00:20:32 --> 00:20:33
			And free mixing
		
00:20:33 --> 00:20:34
			free mixing.
		
00:20:35 --> 00:20:37
			And it gets to a point where there's
		
00:20:37 --> 00:20:40
			total loss of the concept of modesty
		
00:20:41 --> 00:20:42
			and total desensitization
		
00:20:43 --> 00:20:44
			of what is haram,
		
00:20:45 --> 00:20:47
			like, thinking it's normal. It's okay to have
		
00:20:47 --> 00:20:50
			a a friend who's a male and sit
		
00:20:50 --> 00:20:52
			alone with him and go out with him,
		
00:20:52 --> 00:20:53
			and we're not even married.
		
00:20:54 --> 00:20:56
			You know? It's okay to just, you know,
		
00:20:56 --> 00:20:58
			have, like, these relationships, you know, just sit
		
00:20:58 --> 00:21:00
			in university and have a chat and have
		
00:21:00 --> 00:21:02
			a laugh and mix together and go out
		
00:21:02 --> 00:21:04
			as a group of boys and girls, and
		
00:21:04 --> 00:21:06
			it's okay. I'm not just talking about youth
		
00:21:06 --> 00:21:08
			here because everyone looks at the youth. Go
		
00:21:08 --> 00:21:10
			look in the houses of the of the
		
00:21:10 --> 00:21:13
			adults. There's not much some some homes are
		
00:21:13 --> 00:21:15
			lumps done. Can you really see a difference
		
00:21:15 --> 00:21:16
			between the the Muslim house and the non
		
00:21:16 --> 00:21:18
			Muslim house? That's what you have to ask
		
00:21:18 --> 00:21:19
			yourself, you know.
		
00:21:20 --> 00:21:22
			So we've already seen we've already seen the
		
00:21:22 --> 00:21:24
			breaking down of these guidelines. Okay?
		
00:21:24 --> 00:21:26
			Alright. So let's look at
		
00:21:27 --> 00:21:29
			what are the basic guidelines
		
00:21:30 --> 00:21:32
			that the sharia has laid down, and these
		
00:21:32 --> 00:21:33
			are guidelines
		
00:21:33 --> 00:21:36
			which must be upheld regardless of the situation.
		
00:21:37 --> 00:21:39
			Okay? So I'm I'm telling you, look, look,
		
00:21:39 --> 00:21:42
			we understand. We are understanding that we are
		
00:21:42 --> 00:21:44
			living in, like, a modern society
		
00:21:45 --> 00:21:46
			and there's gonna be a need for people
		
00:21:46 --> 00:21:48
			to go to university, there's gonna be a
		
00:21:48 --> 00:21:49
			need for people to go to work, there's
		
00:21:49 --> 00:21:51
			gonna be a need for people to interact
		
00:21:51 --> 00:21:52
			with the society. Okay?
		
00:21:52 --> 00:21:55
			But we still have to know what are
		
00:21:55 --> 00:21:57
			the guidelines that we need to be keeping
		
00:21:57 --> 00:21:57
			in our mind
		
00:21:58 --> 00:21:59
			and implementing these
		
00:22:00 --> 00:22:00
			in,
		
00:22:01 --> 00:22:03
			you know, within the the scope of what
		
00:22:03 --> 00:22:04
			we
		
00:22:04 --> 00:22:06
			our normal interaction, our daily interaction.
		
00:22:07 --> 00:22:07
			K?
		
00:22:08 --> 00:22:11
			Alright. So let's start off with some of
		
00:22:11 --> 00:22:12
			these. These are just, like,
		
00:22:12 --> 00:22:16
			basic guidelines that their default default guidelines.
		
00:22:16 --> 00:22:19
			Okay? So the first one is it's not
		
00:22:19 --> 00:22:19
			allowed
		
00:22:20 --> 00:22:22
			for a male and female who are not
		
00:22:22 --> 00:22:25
			married to each other or who are non
		
00:22:25 --> 00:22:28
			to each other to be alone where no
		
00:22:28 --> 00:22:30
			one can walk in on them and no
		
00:22:30 --> 00:22:33
			one can see them. It's not allowed. Okay?
		
00:22:33 --> 00:22:35
			That that's straight away. And obviously, the as
		
00:22:35 --> 00:22:37
			as mentioned in the hadith that that's the
		
00:22:37 --> 00:22:38
			third is the shaitan.
		
00:22:38 --> 00:22:40
			The third is the shaitan. Even if they
		
00:22:40 --> 00:22:42
			think that they can be strong and they've
		
00:22:42 --> 00:22:44
			got good hearts or whatever the whatever the
		
00:22:44 --> 00:22:46
			excuse they give themselves, it is haram.
		
00:22:47 --> 00:22:48
			Okay?
		
00:22:50 --> 00:22:50
			Then
		
00:22:51 --> 00:22:53
			the next one obviously is that
		
00:22:54 --> 00:22:56
			a woman must observe hijab according to the
		
00:22:56 --> 00:22:57
			Islamic guidelines.
		
00:22:58 --> 00:22:59
			Right?
		
00:22:59 --> 00:23:01
			We look at what as Allah says in
		
00:23:01 --> 00:23:02
			the Quran.
		
00:23:13 --> 00:23:15
			So says and say to the believing women
		
00:23:16 --> 00:23:17
			to lower their gaze
		
00:23:17 --> 00:23:19
			and to guard their
		
00:23:19 --> 00:23:20
			their
		
00:23:21 --> 00:23:21
			guard
		
00:23:22 --> 00:23:24
			their, like, as in, guard their what they
		
00:23:24 --> 00:23:27
			have to guard everything that Allah commanded them
		
00:23:27 --> 00:23:28
			to to cover
		
00:23:29 --> 00:23:32
			and that they should not display their adornment,
		
00:23:32 --> 00:23:33
			their beauty, their adornments,
		
00:23:34 --> 00:23:35
			you know, their
		
00:23:35 --> 00:23:35
			ornaments,
		
00:23:37 --> 00:23:39
			except for that which is apparent. That's just
		
00:23:39 --> 00:23:41
			like the natural that is, you know,
		
00:23:41 --> 00:23:42
			is
		
00:23:42 --> 00:23:44
			just things that it's
		
00:23:44 --> 00:23:46
			natural for her to show. Alright?
		
00:23:48 --> 00:23:50
			Other than what's been mentioned in We can
		
00:23:50 --> 00:23:52
			talk about that after. That's a whole topic
		
00:23:52 --> 00:23:53
			in itself.
		
00:23:53 --> 00:23:55
			The third the third one is that a
		
00:23:55 --> 00:23:57
			woman should not do actions
		
00:23:58 --> 00:24:00
			which are considered to be seductive,
		
00:24:01 --> 00:24:04
			which cause men to be attracted to her.
		
00:24:04 --> 00:24:05
			Okay?
		
00:24:05 --> 00:24:08
			And this is where this is where women
		
00:24:08 --> 00:24:09
			have to be aware of this because a
		
00:24:09 --> 00:24:11
			lot of women you know, it's not about
		
00:24:11 --> 00:24:12
			you having good intentions.
		
00:24:13 --> 00:24:16
			You've gotta understand that your actions have consequences.
		
00:24:17 --> 00:24:17
			And,
		
00:24:18 --> 00:24:20
			like, you might think of it as being
		
00:24:20 --> 00:24:20
			innocent,
		
00:24:21 --> 00:24:23
			but you've gotta think about how does a
		
00:24:23 --> 00:24:25
			man see that when men, like, Allah as
		
00:24:25 --> 00:24:26
			I'm gonna talk about later,
		
00:24:26 --> 00:24:28
			the messenger of Allah said, I did not
		
00:24:28 --> 00:24:28
			leave
		
00:24:29 --> 00:24:31
			any fitna greater for men than women, like,
		
00:24:31 --> 00:24:32
			because they are so attracted
		
00:24:33 --> 00:24:35
			naturally to women. Right? The beauty of women.
		
00:24:35 --> 00:24:39
			Okay. So, obviously, if you do certain actions,
		
00:24:40 --> 00:24:41
			okay,
		
00:24:41 --> 00:24:43
			There are certain actions that you do that
		
00:24:43 --> 00:24:45
			you might think it's not a big deal,
		
00:24:45 --> 00:24:46
			but
		
00:24:46 --> 00:24:48
			it's very it can be very seductive to
		
00:24:48 --> 00:24:49
			a man, and I'll I'll give it to
		
00:24:49 --> 00:24:52
			explain to explain that. But but, basically, let's
		
00:24:52 --> 00:24:54
			talk about it. There there's there's quite a
		
00:24:54 --> 00:24:55
			few different examples.
		
00:24:55 --> 00:24:57
			Alright. So for example,
		
00:24:58 --> 00:25:00
			a woman has to be careful not to
		
00:25:00 --> 00:25:02
			speak with men in a way that is
		
00:25:03 --> 00:25:04
			overly friendly
		
00:25:05 --> 00:25:06
			or seductive and flirting.
		
00:25:08 --> 00:25:10
			Okay? So you you can't be speaking like,
		
00:25:10 --> 00:25:12
			you can't be speaking to a male, right,
		
00:25:12 --> 00:25:15
			who who who's not who's not your and
		
00:25:15 --> 00:25:16
			who's not your husband
		
00:25:17 --> 00:25:19
			in a way that's overly friendly, like, you
		
00:25:19 --> 00:25:21
			have deep and meaningful conversations, and you're not
		
00:25:21 --> 00:25:24
			even married to that person. They're not your.
		
00:25:24 --> 00:25:26
			You know? Or, you know, you speak a
		
00:25:26 --> 00:25:28
			seductive way like, oh, yeah, Habibi. You're so
		
00:25:28 --> 00:25:30
			cute. Whatever. Like, I was gonna be like,
		
00:25:30 --> 00:25:31
			I'm just giving you some examples. You know?
		
00:25:31 --> 00:25:33
			Do you understand? Whatever. Like, you can't be
		
00:25:33 --> 00:25:35
			speaking that light way with him. It's not
		
00:25:35 --> 00:25:37
			allowed for you to speak like that. Okay?
		
00:25:38 --> 00:25:40
			And how do we know this?
		
00:25:40 --> 00:25:42
			Allah says in Sur Al
		
00:25:45 --> 00:25:45
			Azzab,
		
00:25:51 --> 00:25:51
			So Allah
		
00:25:52 --> 00:25:53
			commanded
		
00:25:55 --> 00:25:56
			in do not
		
00:25:58 --> 00:25:59
			means to soften the speech
		
00:26:00 --> 00:26:01
			where you make it, like
		
00:26:01 --> 00:26:03
			like, in an attractive way. You know what
		
00:26:03 --> 00:26:05
			I mean? Like, you know what you're doing.
		
00:26:05 --> 00:26:08
			Everybody knows. Every woman knows what that means.
		
00:26:08 --> 00:26:10
			Okay? You're you're saying in a way, like,
		
00:26:11 --> 00:26:13
			soft way, like, trying to, you know,
		
00:26:14 --> 00:26:16
			sound nice to the guy, basically. Right?
		
00:26:17 --> 00:26:19
			Why why it's not allowed?
		
00:26:23 --> 00:26:25
			Because that will cause the one who has
		
00:26:25 --> 00:26:27
			a sickness in his heart to,
		
00:26:28 --> 00:26:30
			you know, to start thinking about you in
		
00:26:30 --> 00:26:32
			a way that he shouldn't be thinking about
		
00:26:32 --> 00:26:33
			you. Okay?
		
00:26:34 --> 00:26:35
			So
		
00:26:37 --> 00:26:38
			it doesn't mean we can't speak at all.
		
00:26:38 --> 00:26:41
			That's another exaggeration that we see. Some people
		
00:26:41 --> 00:26:43
			say a woman, her voice can never be
		
00:26:43 --> 00:26:44
			heard. She doesn't have to put rocks in
		
00:26:44 --> 00:26:46
			her mouth if she wants to speak.
		
00:26:46 --> 00:26:48
			Like, there's no proof of that at all.
		
00:26:48 --> 00:26:49
			I heard that. There's no proof of that
		
00:26:49 --> 00:26:51
			at all and the proof against it is
		
00:26:51 --> 00:26:52
			exactly this.
		
00:26:55 --> 00:26:57
			She speaks in a noble way.
		
00:26:58 --> 00:27:00
			She speaks in a noble and upright way.
		
00:27:00 --> 00:27:02
			Allah did not say she can't speak.
		
00:27:03 --> 00:27:05
			He just said when you speak,
		
00:27:07 --> 00:27:09
			speak in a way that is dignified and
		
00:27:09 --> 00:27:12
			noble, a formal way, a businesslike way. That's
		
00:27:12 --> 00:27:13
			the best way you can understand it now.
		
00:27:13 --> 00:27:15
			Like, if you were talking to your boss
		
00:27:15 --> 00:27:17
			at work, how would you speak to them?
		
00:27:18 --> 00:27:19
			You say what you need to be you
		
00:27:19 --> 00:27:21
			you say what needs to be said. You
		
00:27:21 --> 00:27:23
			speak about what needs to be said. Start
		
00:27:23 --> 00:27:25
			talking about everything, about your life story, and,
		
00:27:25 --> 00:27:28
			like, think it's Yanny, what's his business? You
		
00:27:28 --> 00:27:30
			know? So that's that's that's going out of
		
00:27:30 --> 00:27:31
			the bounds. Right?
		
00:27:31 --> 00:27:32
			Okay.
		
00:27:32 --> 00:27:35
			So that's that's we're still talking about we're
		
00:27:35 --> 00:27:37
			still talking about how the woman has to
		
00:27:37 --> 00:27:39
			be careful not to do actions that are
		
00:27:39 --> 00:27:41
			considered to be seductive. Right? So we're talking
		
00:27:41 --> 00:27:42
			about
		
00:27:42 --> 00:27:44
			speaking a seductive way.
		
00:27:44 --> 00:27:47
			Also, even physical actions, you be beware of
		
00:27:47 --> 00:27:48
			the way you conduct yourself. So it's not
		
00:27:48 --> 00:27:49
			just about the way you speak or the
		
00:27:49 --> 00:27:52
			what you speak about. It's also about the
		
00:27:52 --> 00:27:54
			way you conduct yourself. So, for example,
		
00:27:55 --> 00:27:56
			like, doing actions
		
00:27:57 --> 00:27:59
			which could cause men to look at her
		
00:27:59 --> 00:28:01
			and think about her. Now let's give her
		
00:28:01 --> 00:28:04
			give an example. Okay? I know because I'm
		
00:28:04 --> 00:28:05
			on Instagram. Alright?
		
00:28:05 --> 00:28:06
			So,
		
00:28:07 --> 00:28:09
			you know, and and, you know, on TikTok
		
00:28:09 --> 00:28:10
			and everywhere. Right? And, you know, you get
		
00:28:10 --> 00:28:11
			these girls that go
		
00:28:12 --> 00:28:15
			and, like, I don't know. They pull all
		
00:28:15 --> 00:28:16
			these faces and
		
00:28:16 --> 00:28:18
			I don't know what to get.
		
00:28:18 --> 00:28:21
			And all these are like like okay. You
		
00:28:21 --> 00:28:23
			think you're just talking to sisters. You know
		
00:28:23 --> 00:28:25
			there's brothers on there. You can't be putting
		
00:28:25 --> 00:28:28
			those kind of videos on there. Do you
		
00:28:28 --> 00:28:30
			understand? This is completely going out of the
		
00:28:30 --> 00:28:33
			bounds of the shidi ark. Right? Even if
		
00:28:33 --> 00:28:34
			she's gotten the pop. I don't care if
		
00:28:34 --> 00:28:36
			she's gotten the pop on. I don't care
		
00:28:36 --> 00:28:37
			if she's got the best hijab on. That's
		
00:28:37 --> 00:28:39
			not the you understand? So this is the
		
00:28:39 --> 00:28:41
			problem we have now where you you might
		
00:28:41 --> 00:28:43
			think, oh, this girl wears hijab or this
		
00:28:43 --> 00:28:45
			girl wears but it's also the way you
		
00:28:45 --> 00:28:46
			act as well. It's not just the and
		
00:28:46 --> 00:28:49
			the hijab. It's about also not acting in
		
00:28:49 --> 00:28:50
			seductive way. Okay?
		
00:28:51 --> 00:28:53
			And how do we know this? For example,
		
00:28:53 --> 00:28:55
			in the ayah that talks about, you know,
		
00:28:55 --> 00:28:57
			Surah Nur, if you go to Surah Nur.
		
00:28:57 --> 00:28:59
			Right? Allah says in if you go back
		
00:28:59 --> 00:29:00
			into that verse,
		
00:29:01 --> 00:29:01
			he says,
		
00:29:09 --> 00:29:11
			You know, not doing physical actions, right, that
		
00:29:11 --> 00:29:14
			attract the opposite gender to yourself. Right? And
		
00:29:14 --> 00:29:16
			what is this ISA? What is this ISA?
		
00:29:16 --> 00:29:17
			It says
		
00:29:18 --> 00:29:18
			do not
		
00:29:19 --> 00:29:20
			hit your feet.
		
00:29:21 --> 00:29:22
			Right? Because this is what the ladies in
		
00:29:22 --> 00:29:24
			Jahili used to do. They used to walk
		
00:29:25 --> 00:29:26
			and they would bang their they would bang
		
00:29:26 --> 00:29:29
			their, you know, feet on the ground with
		
00:29:29 --> 00:29:31
			their, you know, their shoes on the ground.
		
00:29:31 --> 00:29:34
			Why? Because they wanted to show off the
		
00:29:34 --> 00:29:36
			anklets that they had on the bottom of
		
00:29:36 --> 00:29:36
			their legs.
		
00:29:37 --> 00:29:39
			Do you understand? So they wanted to they
		
00:29:39 --> 00:29:41
			wanted to attract the men to them by
		
00:29:41 --> 00:29:43
			doing that to say, look what I've got
		
00:29:43 --> 00:29:44
			under here. You know? Whatever.
		
00:29:46 --> 00:29:47
			Alright.
		
00:29:50 --> 00:29:50
			So,
		
00:29:51 --> 00:29:53
			but, like, we can we can see that
		
00:29:53 --> 00:29:54
			that was what they used to do. Like,
		
00:29:54 --> 00:29:56
			they used to do these actions, alright, to
		
00:29:56 --> 00:29:58
			attract to attract men to them,
		
00:30:00 --> 00:30:01
			but it's the same thing. If you do
		
00:30:01 --> 00:30:03
			other type of physical actions,
		
00:30:04 --> 00:30:05
			right, you're doing you're doing the same kind
		
00:30:05 --> 00:30:07
			of thing. If you're doing those kind of,
		
00:30:07 --> 00:30:07
			like,
		
00:30:08 --> 00:30:09
			facial expressions
		
00:30:09 --> 00:30:11
			or like you're going and you're and you're
		
00:30:11 --> 00:30:13
			going like this or you're doing a dance,
		
00:30:13 --> 00:30:15
			like you get women on you get women
		
00:30:15 --> 00:30:17
			on Instagram or, you know, TikTok, and they're
		
00:30:17 --> 00:30:19
			going and like that, they're doing a dance
		
00:30:19 --> 00:30:21
			in front of everybody or they're they're going,
		
00:30:21 --> 00:30:23
			like, you know, moving as a moving in
		
00:30:23 --> 00:30:26
			a seductive way. So this is where you
		
00:30:26 --> 00:30:28
			can see that that's that's not allowed. Okay?
		
00:30:28 --> 00:30:30
			It's it's very easy to see it. Okay?
		
00:30:31 --> 00:30:31
			Now
		
00:30:32 --> 00:30:34
			the other thing we can say as well
		
00:30:34 --> 00:30:36
			is we can see in the hadith this
		
00:30:36 --> 00:30:38
			could also come in the form of the
		
00:30:38 --> 00:30:39
			way that they walk,
		
00:30:40 --> 00:30:41
			the way that the woman walks,
		
00:30:42 --> 00:30:44
			or the way she styles her hair.
		
00:30:44 --> 00:30:46
			Okay? Even if it was under her her
		
00:30:46 --> 00:30:49
			hijab. She has to be conscious. Alright? So
		
00:30:49 --> 00:30:50
			how do we know this? Because there's the
		
00:30:50 --> 00:30:52
			hadith, which I'm sure most of you have
		
00:30:52 --> 00:30:54
			ever heard this quote so much. Right?
		
00:31:01 --> 00:31:03
			The the women who,
		
00:31:03 --> 00:31:06
			these are women who are half naked, like,
		
00:31:06 --> 00:31:07
			they're dressed, but half naked,
		
00:31:08 --> 00:31:09
			and that they,
		
00:31:10 --> 00:31:12
			you know, that they sway from side to
		
00:31:12 --> 00:31:13
			side when they walk, you know, because, you
		
00:31:13 --> 00:31:15
			know, you know, women who've got, for example,
		
00:31:15 --> 00:31:17
			high heels and they they sway like that
		
00:31:17 --> 00:31:18
			to the backsides,
		
00:31:20 --> 00:31:22
			you know, moving around, stuff like that.
		
00:31:22 --> 00:31:24
			And also, you know, and he and also
		
00:31:24 --> 00:31:26
			the messenger fellow mentioned about how they're piling
		
00:31:26 --> 00:31:28
			their their their hair on their head.
		
00:31:29 --> 00:31:31
			Okay. Now whether that's with the hijab or
		
00:31:31 --> 00:31:32
			without hijab. So it could be with the
		
00:31:32 --> 00:31:34
			with without the hijab, it could be, like,
		
00:31:34 --> 00:31:35
			piling their head up to show, you know,
		
00:31:35 --> 00:31:36
			whatever.
		
00:31:36 --> 00:31:38
			But it could also be under the hijab
		
00:31:38 --> 00:31:40
			because if you're piling your hair up under
		
00:31:40 --> 00:31:42
			your hijab, it's kinda like showing off, look
		
00:31:42 --> 00:31:43
			at my I've got long hair.
		
00:31:44 --> 00:31:46
			Like, you're making it obvious to a man
		
00:31:46 --> 00:31:47
			that, oh, look at me. I've got long
		
00:31:47 --> 00:31:50
			hair. You understand? Like, you might say, why
		
00:31:50 --> 00:31:51
			do you do that? Ask yourself as a
		
00:31:51 --> 00:31:53
			woman. Why do you why would you put
		
00:31:53 --> 00:31:54
			all your hair up piled up on your
		
00:31:54 --> 00:31:56
			hair? What's the purpose of that?
		
00:31:56 --> 00:31:59
			And ask yourself that question. Do you understand
		
00:31:59 --> 00:32:01
			if the hijab is sit like, the the
		
00:32:01 --> 00:32:02
			the hijab is,
		
00:32:02 --> 00:32:03
			you know, to conceal.
		
00:32:04 --> 00:32:04
			You know?
		
00:32:05 --> 00:32:07
			Alright. So that's another thing.
		
00:32:07 --> 00:32:08
			Then
		
00:32:08 --> 00:32:10
			another thing we have in as well mentioned
		
00:32:10 --> 00:32:12
			in the in the in the sunnah as
		
00:32:12 --> 00:32:15
			well is wearing perfume that can be smelled
		
00:32:15 --> 00:32:17
			perfume that can be smelled. And, honestly, I
		
00:32:17 --> 00:32:19
			find that unfortunately, this is this is gonna
		
00:32:19 --> 00:32:21
			be becoming very widespread now. Women are be
		
00:32:21 --> 00:32:23
			a lot of women are becoming so complacent.
		
00:32:23 --> 00:32:23
			Like,
		
00:32:24 --> 00:32:25
			many, many times I have women, you know,
		
00:32:26 --> 00:32:29
			maybe even, like, you know, I come across
		
00:32:29 --> 00:32:29
			women.
		
00:32:30 --> 00:32:32
			And, honestly, you can feel they're they're perfect
		
00:32:32 --> 00:32:33
			from miles away.
		
00:32:33 --> 00:32:35
			Like, I'm I'm a woman and I, you
		
00:32:35 --> 00:32:36
			know, like, what about the men? They they
		
00:32:36 --> 00:32:38
			will get for sure they're gonna walk past
		
00:32:38 --> 00:32:40
			men and people gonna, like, they're gonna smell
		
00:32:40 --> 00:32:41
			it. Right? So
		
00:32:42 --> 00:32:43
			in the in the hadith,
		
00:32:44 --> 00:32:47
			it mentions about that that woman who goes
		
00:32:47 --> 00:32:49
			and puts perfume on herself
		
00:32:50 --> 00:32:52
			and then she passes by a gathering of
		
00:32:52 --> 00:32:53
			men
		
00:32:53 --> 00:32:54
			that she is
		
00:32:55 --> 00:32:57
			like a zaniyah. What does that mean? It
		
00:32:57 --> 00:32:59
			doesn't mean she actually is like a zaniyah,
		
00:32:59 --> 00:33:01
			but it means because she has called to
		
00:33:02 --> 00:33:03
			do you see what we talked about before
		
00:33:03 --> 00:33:03
			about?
		
00:33:05 --> 00:33:07
			We said about the means to haram. She
		
00:33:07 --> 00:33:09
			herself becomes a means to haram by that
		
00:33:09 --> 00:33:10
			because
		
00:33:10 --> 00:33:12
			she's calling, like, with her with that strong
		
00:33:12 --> 00:33:13
			perfume,
		
00:33:13 --> 00:33:16
			and she's attracting the men to think about
		
00:33:16 --> 00:33:18
			her in a seductive way. Like, she's basically
		
00:33:18 --> 00:33:20
			saying, like, she might not intend it, but,
		
00:33:20 --> 00:33:23
			you know, I'm sorry, sisters. You it's the
		
00:33:23 --> 00:33:25
			world doesn't just revolve around you. You know
		
00:33:25 --> 00:33:26
			what I'm trying to say? The world doesn't
		
00:33:26 --> 00:33:28
			just revolve about around me or you. You
		
00:33:28 --> 00:33:29
			know? We we also have to think that
		
00:33:29 --> 00:33:31
			our actions have consequences
		
00:33:31 --> 00:33:34
			too. Right? And so by someone putting on
		
00:33:34 --> 00:33:36
			strong perfume, it's basically like saying, like, hey.
		
00:33:36 --> 00:33:37
			I'm available.
		
00:33:38 --> 00:33:39
			Like, that's what it literally is like saying.
		
00:33:39 --> 00:33:41
			Like, hey. You know? Like, you put yourself
		
00:33:41 --> 00:33:43
			out there. You're not trying to, you know,
		
00:33:43 --> 00:33:45
			conceal yourself. Right?
		
00:33:46 --> 00:33:48
			And we can say that under this because
		
00:33:48 --> 00:33:50
			the the hadith talk about
		
00:33:51 --> 00:33:53
			perfume, but, I mean, look at today with
		
00:33:53 --> 00:33:54
			the the makeup
		
00:33:55 --> 00:33:58
			and, you know, fake eyelashes and all of
		
00:33:58 --> 00:34:00
			that as well. Like, that also obviously, if
		
00:34:00 --> 00:34:03
			you're wearing that outside where where where mom
		
00:34:03 --> 00:34:05
			runs can see you or, like, it's on
		
00:34:05 --> 00:34:06
			social media,
		
00:34:06 --> 00:34:08
			well, that's the same thing. You know, you're
		
00:34:08 --> 00:34:09
			still gonna be attracting
		
00:34:10 --> 00:34:12
			like, it's a type of seduction. It comes
		
00:34:12 --> 00:34:14
			under a type of seduction where you're attracting
		
00:34:14 --> 00:34:15
			male sites
		
00:34:16 --> 00:34:16
			towards you.
		
00:34:17 --> 00:34:19
			Okay? And, obviously, that that goes without saying,
		
00:34:19 --> 00:34:23
			like, tight revealing clothing, obviously. Tight revealing clothing
		
00:34:23 --> 00:34:25
			that is showing off parts of your body,
		
00:34:25 --> 00:34:26
			you know, easily
		
00:34:26 --> 00:34:28
			to be seen, then, of course,
		
00:34:28 --> 00:34:30
			that also is a time of seduction. But
		
00:34:30 --> 00:34:32
			they said they didn't change it. They don't
		
00:34:32 --> 00:34:33
			exist. That's what I'm trying to say. This
		
00:34:33 --> 00:34:35
			is what they've got the wrong idea because
		
00:34:35 --> 00:34:37
			in the the Sharia came not just for
		
00:34:37 --> 00:34:40
			the individual, but your responsibility
		
00:34:41 --> 00:34:41
			to
		
00:34:42 --> 00:34:44
			the society around you. And we all have
		
00:34:44 --> 00:34:45
			a part to play. And let me just
		
00:34:45 --> 00:34:47
			say this because I also let let me
		
00:34:47 --> 00:34:49
			if anyone's sitting here feeling a bit annoyed
		
00:34:49 --> 00:34:51
			right now, can I say I also feel
		
00:34:51 --> 00:34:54
			very annoyed often where I find so many
		
00:34:54 --> 00:34:56
			times, like, you have like, for example, the,
		
00:34:56 --> 00:34:59
			you know, the it's always about the women?
		
00:34:59 --> 00:35:00
			It's never about the men. We don't hear
		
00:35:00 --> 00:35:01
			about their responsibility,
		
00:35:02 --> 00:35:04
			but you gotta understand it's actually a two
		
00:35:04 --> 00:35:06
			way responsibility. That preserving the Islamic
		
00:35:07 --> 00:35:09
			society and making you know, trying to preserve
		
00:35:09 --> 00:35:10
			the chastity
		
00:35:11 --> 00:35:12
			in the Islamic society
		
00:35:12 --> 00:35:15
			is both the responsibility of the males and
		
00:35:15 --> 00:35:17
			females. It's not just all the females responsibility.
		
00:35:17 --> 00:35:18
			Okay? If she's done
		
00:35:19 --> 00:35:21
			these guidelines, what I'm talking about, it's actually
		
00:35:21 --> 00:35:23
			on the men now. It's not women have
		
00:35:23 --> 00:35:25
			to shrink and become like a like, she
		
00:35:25 --> 00:35:26
			has to practically
		
00:35:26 --> 00:35:28
			like, I like I believe you. I can
		
00:35:28 --> 00:35:30
			go on about this. Like, I go on,
		
00:35:30 --> 00:35:32
			like, I go on, I've got my full
		
00:35:32 --> 00:35:34
			hijab, my full na'ap, and you'll still get
		
00:35:34 --> 00:35:36
			people telling you cover your eyes or something
		
00:35:36 --> 00:35:38
			like this. You know? I'm sorry. I have
		
00:35:38 --> 00:35:40
			done what Allah had I've done even more
		
00:35:40 --> 00:35:41
			because I wear hijack. I wear
		
00:35:42 --> 00:35:43
			You know? So I have done more than
		
00:35:43 --> 00:35:45
			what Allah has commanded me, and I'm not
		
00:35:45 --> 00:35:46
			going to like, we're not expected to now
		
00:35:46 --> 00:35:49
			shrink and become, like, in totally invisible
		
00:35:49 --> 00:35:51
			in society, and we can't even walk out
		
00:35:51 --> 00:35:52
			of our house because we're worried about our
		
00:35:52 --> 00:35:54
			man's gonna like, no. It doesn't work like
		
00:35:54 --> 00:35:56
			that. Allah did not,
		
00:35:56 --> 00:35:58
			order us to wear hijab.
		
00:35:58 --> 00:35:59
			Like, then if we're not supposed to go
		
00:35:59 --> 00:36:00
			to our house at all, why do we
		
00:36:00 --> 00:36:02
			wear hijab at all? We might we might
		
00:36:02 --> 00:36:03
			as well just say, stay in your house
		
00:36:03 --> 00:36:04
			and don't wait, you know, don't go to
		
00:36:04 --> 00:36:06
			your house at all. That's not that's not
		
00:36:06 --> 00:36:08
			actually our sharia, which I will speak in
		
00:36:08 --> 00:36:09
			a little while.
		
00:36:09 --> 00:36:11
			But I'm just trying to show us, like,
		
00:36:11 --> 00:36:13
			there are obviously things that we have to
		
00:36:13 --> 00:36:14
			think about as women. Right?
		
00:36:15 --> 00:36:15
			Now
		
00:36:16 --> 00:36:17
			non mahrams.
		
00:36:18 --> 00:36:21
			This is another this is another guideline. Non
		
00:36:21 --> 00:36:22
			mahrams need to maintain
		
00:36:22 --> 00:36:24
			high levels of Islamic akhlaq
		
00:36:25 --> 00:36:27
			when interacting with one another.
		
00:36:27 --> 00:36:28
			Okay?
		
00:36:29 --> 00:36:31
			Now the guideline I love this hadith that
		
00:36:31 --> 00:36:33
			I mentioned before. I love this hadith.
		
00:36:34 --> 00:36:35
			This you can see the guideline
		
00:36:36 --> 00:36:37
			set out for you. You can take the
		
00:36:37 --> 00:36:38
			guideline for this
		
00:36:39 --> 00:36:41
			from this hadith which in which the messenger
		
00:36:41 --> 00:36:42
			Allah said,
		
00:36:45 --> 00:36:47
			that the two eyes, the zina, the share
		
00:36:47 --> 00:36:49
			of zina that they have is due to
		
00:36:49 --> 00:36:52
			the the haram look, the unlawful glance or
		
00:36:52 --> 00:36:55
			the unlawful staring at someone that you're, you
		
00:36:55 --> 00:36:56
			know,
		
00:36:57 --> 00:36:58
			you know, attracted to.
		
00:37:02 --> 00:37:04
			Like, I won't go through the whole hadith
		
00:37:04 --> 00:37:05
			again. I'll I'll go through it 1 by
		
00:37:05 --> 00:37:05
			1.
		
00:37:06 --> 00:37:08
			But let's let's look at some of these
		
00:37:08 --> 00:37:10
			by themselves and give examples now, not just
		
00:37:10 --> 00:37:12
			talk about it, but what are the examples
		
00:37:12 --> 00:37:13
			of this? How do we implement this? Right?
		
00:37:13 --> 00:37:16
			So if we look at the first one
		
00:37:16 --> 00:37:18
			where Allah men where the messenger of Allah
		
00:37:19 --> 00:37:21
			mentions about the eye, its
		
00:37:22 --> 00:37:25
			share of zina is is is the the
		
00:37:25 --> 00:37:26
			the look. Right? So it's the, obviously, it's
		
00:37:26 --> 00:37:30
			the unlawful look. The unlawful look. Right? What
		
00:37:30 --> 00:37:32
			does that unlawful look mean?
		
00:37:32 --> 00:37:35
			It means looking with desire at the opposite
		
00:37:35 --> 00:37:37
			gender like it like your full, like, you
		
00:37:37 --> 00:37:40
			know, full checking them out, staring, like like,
		
00:37:40 --> 00:37:42
			lusting, like, you know what I'm trying to
		
00:37:42 --> 00:37:43
			say? Like, obviously,
		
00:37:43 --> 00:37:45
			it's it's, you know, obviously it's normal. We
		
00:37:45 --> 00:37:47
			we live in a society, you know, any
		
00:37:47 --> 00:37:48
			society, like, you look at, at like a
		
00:37:48 --> 00:37:51
			sheikh talking and that's okay. It's okay to
		
00:37:51 --> 00:37:51
			look at,
		
00:37:52 --> 00:37:53
			a man and, you know, you're just looking
		
00:37:53 --> 00:37:55
			at him to listen to what he's saying
		
00:37:55 --> 00:37:57
			or something like that. But when it's not
		
00:37:57 --> 00:37:58
			allowed is if you feel that, you know,
		
00:37:58 --> 00:38:01
			you're getting attracted to him, you know, that's
		
00:38:01 --> 00:38:02
			when when Allah says
		
00:38:03 --> 00:38:04
			you know, he says about to the believing
		
00:38:04 --> 00:38:06
			women in particular, he says,
		
00:38:09 --> 00:38:12
			Right? That's when you lower your gaze.
		
00:38:12 --> 00:38:14
			But this is also for the men too.
		
00:38:14 --> 00:38:16
			So if the men the man feels
		
00:38:16 --> 00:38:18
			after a woman has done all her, you
		
00:38:18 --> 00:38:21
			know, she's done her wajib of covering herself
		
00:38:21 --> 00:38:23
			the way Allah has ordered her, if he
		
00:38:23 --> 00:38:26
			felt that he feels, you know, attracted to
		
00:38:26 --> 00:38:27
			her, he's not allowed to just keep staring
		
00:38:27 --> 00:38:28
			at her. He has to lower his guys.
		
00:38:28 --> 00:38:30
			He has to do his job. Right? He
		
00:38:30 --> 00:38:32
			has to do his side of the of
		
00:38:32 --> 00:38:34
			what's he's been ordered. That's what Allah said.
		
00:38:34 --> 00:38:36
			Even before he ordered the women to lower
		
00:38:36 --> 00:38:38
			their gaze, he ordered the may the males
		
00:38:38 --> 00:38:39
			to lower their gaze first.
		
00:38:39 --> 00:38:40
			Right? He says,
		
00:38:46 --> 00:38:49
			Say the believing men to lower their gaze
		
00:38:49 --> 00:38:51
			and to guard their to guard their their
		
00:38:51 --> 00:38:53
			private parts and, you know,
		
00:38:54 --> 00:38:57
			protect their chastity protect their chastity.
		
00:38:57 --> 00:38:58
			And Allah says,
		
00:39:00 --> 00:39:02
			That is more pure for them.
		
00:39:05 --> 00:39:06
			Allah knows.
		
00:39:07 --> 00:39:09
			He's the most knowing of what you do.
		
00:39:09 --> 00:39:11
			Like, you try to, you know, if you
		
00:39:11 --> 00:39:13
			like, Allah knows. Allah sees this the the
		
00:39:13 --> 00:39:14
			eyes,
		
00:39:15 --> 00:39:16
			you know, the secret looks and stuff like
		
00:39:16 --> 00:39:18
			that. If someone locks them up in a
		
00:39:18 --> 00:39:21
			bedroom and starts looking at * or something
		
00:39:21 --> 00:39:23
			Haram, Allah sees it. You know what I
		
00:39:23 --> 00:39:24
			mean? They can hide from anyone else, but
		
00:39:24 --> 00:39:26
			Allah sees it. Right?
		
00:39:28 --> 00:39:30
			So that's that's in relation to that that's
		
00:39:30 --> 00:39:32
			the share of zina. When the eyes when
		
00:39:32 --> 00:39:35
			someone allows their eyes to look at what's
		
00:39:35 --> 00:39:36
			what's haram to look at.
		
00:39:37 --> 00:39:40
			And that's, again, where hijab also plays a
		
00:39:40 --> 00:39:42
			role because we are by us doing that,
		
00:39:42 --> 00:39:44
			we are shielding it's like a shield. Think
		
00:39:44 --> 00:39:46
			about your hijab as a shield. You put
		
00:39:46 --> 00:39:48
			on your shield before you go to the
		
00:39:48 --> 00:39:49
			battle battlefield
		
00:39:49 --> 00:39:50
			battlefield,
		
00:39:51 --> 00:39:54
			and you're shielding yourself from the unwanted looks,
		
00:39:55 --> 00:39:57
			keeping your keeping yourself to yourself,
		
00:39:58 --> 00:39:59
			you know. You you feel for for you
		
00:39:59 --> 00:40:02
			and for for your husband, for your,
		
00:40:02 --> 00:40:03
			family,
		
00:40:03 --> 00:40:06
			your sisters in Islam, he's got no business
		
00:40:06 --> 00:40:08
			with you. Right? You're not you're not to
		
00:40:08 --> 00:40:09
			share around just
		
00:40:10 --> 00:40:11
			easy in the street. Right?
		
00:40:12 --> 00:40:14
			And also this shows us that if and
		
00:40:14 --> 00:40:16
			from this, we can see that if people
		
00:40:16 --> 00:40:17
			were sitting together in the same room, so
		
00:40:17 --> 00:40:19
			if you have men and women sitting in
		
00:40:19 --> 00:40:20
			the room together,
		
00:40:20 --> 00:40:21
			then
		
00:40:21 --> 00:40:23
			the way they should sit is in a
		
00:40:23 --> 00:40:25
			way they're not directly facing each other. So
		
00:40:25 --> 00:40:28
			we it's possible for men and men to
		
00:40:28 --> 00:40:30
			come in the same room and sit,
		
00:40:30 --> 00:40:32
			but the way that we should lay out
		
00:40:32 --> 00:40:35
			the seating arrangements in that case is in
		
00:40:35 --> 00:40:37
			a way where non mahrams are not directly
		
00:40:37 --> 00:40:39
			facing and looking at each other.
		
00:40:39 --> 00:40:40
			Okay? So it could be
		
00:40:41 --> 00:40:43
			I mean, ideally, it would petition. If you
		
00:40:43 --> 00:40:44
			can, then aside. But if you can't do
		
00:40:44 --> 00:40:47
			that, at least have the males on one
		
00:40:47 --> 00:40:49
			side, the females on another side. So there's
		
00:40:49 --> 00:40:51
			a, you know, and not and looking facing
		
00:40:51 --> 00:40:52
			towards the front, not,
		
00:40:53 --> 00:40:54
			you know, facing towards each other.
		
00:40:55 --> 00:40:56
			And,
		
00:40:56 --> 00:40:58
			you know, you just look at the what
		
00:40:58 --> 00:41:00
			the Quran says, for example, in.
		
00:41:01 --> 00:41:02
			Allah says
		
00:41:14 --> 00:41:16
			So Allah says in these verses
		
00:41:17 --> 00:41:20
			that when you ask them for something
		
00:41:21 --> 00:41:22
			or for a matter,
		
00:41:22 --> 00:41:25
			then ask them from behind a hijab, from
		
00:41:25 --> 00:41:26
			behind a screen or behind,
		
00:41:27 --> 00:41:28
			like, a curtain or a barrier
		
00:41:29 --> 00:41:30
			that
		
00:41:33 --> 00:41:35
			that is more pure for your hearts and
		
00:41:35 --> 00:41:38
			for their hearts. Now this particular ayah, just
		
00:41:38 --> 00:41:40
			to mention, this particular ayah is actually for
		
00:41:41 --> 00:41:42
			the Sahaba
		
00:41:42 --> 00:41:45
			when they came and were gonna ask from
		
00:41:45 --> 00:41:46
			the the
		
00:41:47 --> 00:41:49
			the wives of the messenger of Allah
		
00:41:50 --> 00:41:52
			asking them a fatwa or asking them something
		
00:41:53 --> 00:41:55
			to ask from behind the hijab, behind the
		
00:41:55 --> 00:41:57
			screen. And Allah said that that is pure
		
00:41:57 --> 00:41:59
			for you and their hearts. Right? But just
		
00:41:59 --> 00:42:01
			imagine, my dear sisters, that Allah
		
00:42:02 --> 00:42:02
			sent down
		
00:42:04 --> 00:42:06
			this ayah concerning Abu Bakr Siddiq
		
00:42:07 --> 00:42:09
			that when he goes and asks, for example,
		
00:42:09 --> 00:42:11
			Hafsa, who's the daughter of Omar
		
00:42:13 --> 00:42:13
			that
		
00:42:14 --> 00:42:17
			he should ask her from behind a hijab,
		
00:42:17 --> 00:42:20
			a screen, because hijab means screen. Right? A
		
00:42:20 --> 00:42:20
			barrier.
		
00:42:21 --> 00:42:24
			Despite how clean and pure their hearts were,
		
00:42:26 --> 00:42:29
			right, how pure and clean were the hearts
		
00:42:29 --> 00:42:29
			of Abbaq,
		
00:42:30 --> 00:42:31
			and
		
00:42:32 --> 00:42:34
			Hafsa, the daughter of Omar.
		
00:42:34 --> 00:42:36
			Or if Omar wants to go and ask
		
00:42:36 --> 00:42:38
			something from Aisha, same thing. He should ask
		
00:42:38 --> 00:42:39
			from behind
		
00:42:40 --> 00:42:41
			like a screen. Right?
		
00:42:42 --> 00:42:42
			So
		
00:42:43 --> 00:42:45
			so what the scholars said, if this is
		
00:42:45 --> 00:42:46
			how Allah ordered
		
00:42:46 --> 00:42:49
			those who had the most pure and clean
		
00:42:49 --> 00:42:50
			hearts,
		
00:42:52 --> 00:42:53
			in order for them to avoid any
		
00:42:55 --> 00:42:57
			then we should not imagine that we should
		
00:42:57 --> 00:42:59
			not imagine that just because we have a
		
00:42:59 --> 00:43:01
			good heart that can't come to us.
		
00:43:01 --> 00:43:03
			Right? We should not imagine that just because
		
00:43:03 --> 00:43:05
			we have a good heart that couldn't come
		
00:43:05 --> 00:43:07
			to us. Okay? Because there's and and also
		
00:43:07 --> 00:43:09
			there's no way that our hearts
		
00:43:09 --> 00:43:11
			are on the same level of purity as
		
00:43:11 --> 00:43:13
			as Aisha and Hafsa
		
00:43:13 --> 00:43:15
			nor other men of this time
		
00:43:15 --> 00:43:17
			of the same level of no way.
		
00:43:18 --> 00:43:19
			No way are they on the level of
		
00:43:20 --> 00:43:20
			of.
		
00:43:21 --> 00:43:22
			Okay? So this is what you have to
		
00:43:22 --> 00:43:24
			keep in mind. Right? So that's the first
		
00:43:24 --> 00:43:25
			thing about
		
00:43:26 --> 00:43:28
			about, you know, about the eye gut guarding
		
00:43:28 --> 00:43:30
			the eyes, and that's for males and females.
		
00:43:31 --> 00:43:33
			And we're talking oh, so we're also talking
		
00:43:33 --> 00:43:33
			about
		
00:43:34 --> 00:43:35
			yeah. Nam.
		
00:43:35 --> 00:43:37
			So then the next thing is about the
		
00:43:37 --> 00:43:38
			tongue. The next thing is about the tongue,
		
00:43:39 --> 00:43:40
			how the tongue also has a share
		
00:43:41 --> 00:43:43
			in, you know, in taking that it's from
		
00:43:43 --> 00:43:45
			the means towards and how is that
		
00:43:46 --> 00:43:48
			if the if, obviously, if someone speaks in
		
00:43:48 --> 00:43:50
			a way that is seductive
		
00:43:51 --> 00:43:52
			or, you know
		
00:43:52 --> 00:43:52
			you understand?
		
00:43:54 --> 00:43:56
			You know, speaking when it's not like, now,
		
00:43:56 --> 00:43:56
			like,
		
00:43:57 --> 00:43:58
			you can find women
		
00:43:59 --> 00:44:01
			who would speak in a most disgusting way
		
00:44:01 --> 00:44:02
			with men, like,
		
00:44:03 --> 00:44:05
			explicit things that should not like, private things,
		
00:44:05 --> 00:44:06
			you know,
		
00:44:06 --> 00:44:08
			things that you should not speak about a
		
00:44:08 --> 00:44:10
			man, you know, with the, you know, with
		
00:44:10 --> 00:44:11
			these kind of
		
00:44:11 --> 00:44:13
			in this sort of way. It's not the
		
00:44:13 --> 00:44:15
			way that a woman speaks with a man
		
00:44:15 --> 00:44:16
			like this openly. Right?
		
00:44:17 --> 00:44:19
			So you have to look at the way
		
00:44:19 --> 00:44:20
			you speak. Look at the way you speak.
		
00:44:21 --> 00:44:23
			And again, how do I know how to
		
00:44:23 --> 00:44:25
			speak? I look at what is what would
		
00:44:25 --> 00:44:27
			you consent to be formal and business like?
		
00:44:27 --> 00:44:29
			Like, if you're in a workplace, a professional
		
00:44:29 --> 00:44:30
			workplace,
		
00:44:30 --> 00:44:32
			how would how would you be expected to
		
00:44:32 --> 00:44:34
			speak with each other? That's the way you
		
00:44:34 --> 00:44:36
			should speak with your brother in Islam who's
		
00:44:36 --> 00:44:38
			not you know, you're not married to him
		
00:44:38 --> 00:44:39
			and, he's not your.
		
00:44:40 --> 00:44:41
			And,
		
00:44:41 --> 00:44:43
			again, like I said, the way you speak,
		
00:44:44 --> 00:44:46
			you make it in a dignified manner. Right?
		
00:44:47 --> 00:44:48
			Not not
		
00:44:48 --> 00:44:50
			With haya. No. No. But we but the
		
00:44:50 --> 00:44:52
			thing is when you say haya, no one,
		
00:44:52 --> 00:44:54
			you know, what is even haya? You know?
		
00:44:54 --> 00:44:56
			So we have to explain what it is
		
00:44:56 --> 00:44:58
			because you can say hey out, but it's
		
00:44:58 --> 00:44:59
			too broad. Like, no one understands what does
		
00:44:59 --> 00:45:01
			that mean. You know what I mean? Like,
		
00:45:01 --> 00:45:03
			people don't understand. What what do you mean?
		
00:45:03 --> 00:45:04
			What what what is the barrier? Like, what
		
00:45:04 --> 00:45:07
			is the you see? So and so an
		
00:45:07 --> 00:45:10
			example of that is, like, not laughing and
		
00:45:10 --> 00:45:10
			joking,
		
00:45:12 --> 00:45:14
			speaking freely, and just having a normal conversation,
		
00:45:14 --> 00:45:16
			like, the way you'd speak with your your
		
00:45:16 --> 00:45:16
			girlfriends
		
00:45:17 --> 00:45:18
			and just, Yeah. What did you do on
		
00:45:18 --> 00:45:20
			the weekend? And, like like, that kind of
		
00:45:20 --> 00:45:21
			conversation. No.
		
00:45:22 --> 00:45:24
			You know? It's it's okay it's okay to
		
00:45:24 --> 00:45:25
			say, for example,
		
00:45:26 --> 00:45:27
			a brother dropped something,
		
00:45:27 --> 00:45:28
			jazakaloke
		
00:45:28 --> 00:45:29
			brother, for example,
		
00:45:30 --> 00:45:31
			or, you know,
		
00:45:31 --> 00:45:33
			you saw a brother he, you know, you
		
00:45:33 --> 00:45:36
			know, and, brother, how's your wife? Inshallah, I
		
00:45:36 --> 00:45:38
			ask Allah, please give my salam to your
		
00:45:38 --> 00:45:39
			wife. You know, stuff like that. You know,
		
00:45:39 --> 00:45:41
			that's a dignified way. It's not, you know,
		
00:45:41 --> 00:45:42
			you're not saying anything that's,
		
00:45:44 --> 00:45:45
			you don't try to say getting into personal
		
00:45:46 --> 00:45:47
			getting into personal matters. When you start getting
		
00:45:47 --> 00:45:49
			personal, that's when you know you've gone too
		
00:45:49 --> 00:45:50
			far. Right?
		
00:45:50 --> 00:45:53
			So laughing and, like I said, joking and
		
00:45:53 --> 00:45:54
			just
		
00:45:54 --> 00:45:56
			speaking without boundaries.
		
00:45:57 --> 00:45:58
			And this also includes
		
00:45:58 --> 00:46:00
			when we get together in meetings
		
00:46:01 --> 00:46:02
			or even online interactions,
		
00:46:03 --> 00:46:05
			even online interactions. Like so so it's possible
		
00:46:05 --> 00:46:07
			for men and women to be on the
		
00:46:07 --> 00:46:08
			same
		
00:46:08 --> 00:46:10
			to be on the same,
		
00:46:11 --> 00:46:13
			like, for example, WhatsApp group. Right? If there's
		
00:46:13 --> 00:46:15
			a purpose. Like, maybe they need to talk
		
00:46:15 --> 00:46:17
			about, like, for example, it could be an
		
00:46:17 --> 00:46:19
			MSA, and they need to plan things together.
		
00:46:19 --> 00:46:21
			Right? Or they could be
		
00:46:22 --> 00:46:23
			you know, they need to plan projects. It
		
00:46:23 --> 00:46:25
			might be a charity organization. They need to
		
00:46:25 --> 00:46:27
			plan things. That's okay. They're there and but
		
00:46:27 --> 00:46:28
			they have to talk. They look at the
		
00:46:28 --> 00:46:29
			way you know, they don't get out of
		
00:46:29 --> 00:46:31
			control, start laughing with each other, brother and
		
00:46:31 --> 00:46:33
			sister, you know, in you know, they they
		
00:46:33 --> 00:46:34
			maintain
		
00:46:35 --> 00:46:36
			Islamic etiquettes,
		
00:46:36 --> 00:46:37
			you know, business like,
		
00:46:38 --> 00:46:40
			you know do you understand? This is this
		
00:46:40 --> 00:46:41
			is what we need to maintain.
		
00:46:42 --> 00:46:44
			And, again, what we said before about not
		
00:46:44 --> 00:46:46
			being soft and alluring in a way
		
00:46:46 --> 00:46:48
			that that that the person speaks.
		
00:46:49 --> 00:46:51
			Then the other thing the other thing is
		
00:46:52 --> 00:46:54
			about the other thing mentioned in the same
		
00:46:54 --> 00:46:55
			hadith I was going on I was talking
		
00:46:55 --> 00:46:57
			about was wal yadu tazni
		
00:46:57 --> 00:46:58
			wazinahal
		
00:46:59 --> 00:47:02
			al alams. Right? That they also the the
		
00:47:02 --> 00:47:02
			the hand
		
00:47:03 --> 00:47:04
			has a share of
		
00:47:05 --> 00:47:06
			you know, it's from
		
00:47:09 --> 00:47:09
			the. Like, it
		
00:47:11 --> 00:47:13
			Like, it's from the means that that can
		
00:47:13 --> 00:47:15
			lead to. Right?
		
00:47:15 --> 00:47:17
			This is what's not allowed for non mahrams
		
00:47:17 --> 00:47:19
			to touch each other.
		
00:47:19 --> 00:47:21
			It's not allowed for if if that man's
		
00:47:21 --> 00:47:23
			not your or he's not your husband, you
		
00:47:23 --> 00:47:24
			don't you don't you're not allowed to touch
		
00:47:24 --> 00:47:25
			each other.
		
00:47:25 --> 00:47:27
			Right? There's boundaries,
		
00:47:27 --> 00:47:29
			and that includes shaking hands.
		
00:47:30 --> 00:47:32
			That includes shaking hands. Why is shaking hands
		
00:47:32 --> 00:47:33
			not allowed?
		
00:47:33 --> 00:47:33
			Because
		
00:47:34 --> 00:47:35
			even though it's only you know, you might
		
00:47:35 --> 00:47:37
			think, oh, but he's, you know, it's my
		
00:47:37 --> 00:47:38
			cousin. It's it's my
		
00:47:39 --> 00:47:40
			my auntie's husband.
		
00:47:40 --> 00:47:42
			But it's not allowed. It's not allowed to
		
00:47:42 --> 00:47:43
			he's not he's not your.
		
00:47:44 --> 00:47:45
			And even though you might think you don't
		
00:47:45 --> 00:47:47
			you don't know. Like, you know, it this
		
00:47:47 --> 00:47:49
			is this is it's there to stop it's
		
00:47:49 --> 00:47:51
			there to stop the doors of fitna. It's
		
00:47:51 --> 00:47:53
			there to stop the doors of fitna. Alright,
		
00:47:53 --> 00:47:53
			sisters?
		
00:47:54 --> 00:47:55
			It's not to make to make life hard.
		
00:47:55 --> 00:47:57
			It's there to stop the doors of fitna.
		
00:47:58 --> 00:47:59
			And, you know, there's a there's a hadith
		
00:48:00 --> 00:48:02
			in which the messenger of Allah said,
		
00:48:02 --> 00:48:04
			for a nail of iron to be driven
		
00:48:04 --> 00:48:07
			in the head of 1 of you, it'll
		
00:48:07 --> 00:48:09
			be better for him than to touch a
		
00:48:09 --> 00:48:11
			woman who is not lawful for him.
		
00:48:11 --> 00:48:13
			Right? So it's it's not allowed. Like, you
		
00:48:13 --> 00:48:15
			gotta think about that. It's, Yani because it
		
00:48:15 --> 00:48:16
			can lead to it can lead to a
		
00:48:16 --> 00:48:18
			fitna. It can lead to fitna. Men and
		
00:48:18 --> 00:48:20
			women just freely touching each other. If we
		
00:48:20 --> 00:48:22
			think, oh, okay. He's my cousin. He's my
		
00:48:22 --> 00:48:24
			and then next thing, you know, you you
		
00:48:24 --> 00:48:26
			know, you don't care about you're just letting
		
00:48:26 --> 00:48:27
			anyone touch you. You know?
		
00:48:28 --> 00:48:29
			And this there's a need and this is
		
00:48:29 --> 00:48:32
			there's a Hajjar. Like, for example, a doctor
		
00:48:32 --> 00:48:33
			treats the patient or, you know, things like
		
00:48:33 --> 00:48:35
			that. That's different. You know? But we're saying
		
00:48:35 --> 00:48:37
			the default the default
		
00:48:37 --> 00:48:38
			is that men and women who are not
		
00:48:38 --> 00:48:40
			married to each other do not touch each
		
00:48:40 --> 00:48:41
			other. That's it.
		
00:48:42 --> 00:48:44
			The next one as well is
		
00:48:44 --> 00:48:47
			you need to avoid close-up interactions
		
00:48:48 --> 00:48:49
			with not with non mahrams.
		
00:48:49 --> 00:48:50
			Right?
		
00:48:50 --> 00:48:52
			There needs to be boundaries between
		
00:48:52 --> 00:48:54
			males and females who are not married to
		
00:48:54 --> 00:48:56
			each other. Right? And again, that goes back
		
00:48:56 --> 00:48:57
			to what I had said earlier, that hadith
		
00:48:57 --> 00:48:59
			of the messenger of Allah, salallahu alayhi wa
		
00:48:59 --> 00:49:00
			sallam, which he said,
		
00:49:06 --> 00:49:08
			that I've not left any
		
00:49:09 --> 00:49:11
			fitna that is more harmful to men than
		
00:49:11 --> 00:49:14
			than than women, not because it's women's fault.
		
00:49:14 --> 00:49:15
			They it's because men have to be aware
		
00:49:15 --> 00:49:17
			of that. Like, they have to be aware
		
00:49:17 --> 00:49:19
			of that's their weakness. Like, they naturally are
		
00:49:19 --> 00:49:21
			very attracted to women,
		
00:49:21 --> 00:49:22
			and
		
00:49:23 --> 00:49:23
			and so
		
00:49:24 --> 00:49:26
			because of that, we need to have certain
		
00:49:26 --> 00:49:28
			boundaries to protect ourselves as women.
		
00:49:29 --> 00:49:30
			And
		
00:49:31 --> 00:49:33
			says, just to think of it because people
		
00:49:33 --> 00:49:35
			becoming very ignorant. Now
		
00:49:36 --> 00:49:37
			you can see
		
00:49:37 --> 00:49:39
			a lot of people are becoming so careless
		
00:49:40 --> 00:49:42
			where they're allowing their children to go to
		
00:49:42 --> 00:49:43
			mixed high schools
		
00:49:45 --> 00:49:46
			and so the boys and girls are mixing
		
00:49:46 --> 00:49:48
			in them in the high schools. Now I'm
		
00:49:48 --> 00:49:49
			not talking about if you've got a high
		
00:49:49 --> 00:49:51
			school, there's a a boys section, the girls
		
00:49:51 --> 00:49:53
			section. I'm talking about you're just allowing the
		
00:49:53 --> 00:49:55
			boys and girls to be in this you
		
00:49:55 --> 00:49:56
			know, the classrooms together
		
00:49:57 --> 00:49:57
			and
		
00:49:58 --> 00:50:00
			they can interact and talk
		
00:50:00 --> 00:50:02
			and, you know, you understand? They're they're going
		
00:50:02 --> 00:50:04
			through a very difficult age. Well, in teenage
		
00:50:04 --> 00:50:06
			years, it's a very difficult age.
		
00:50:06 --> 00:50:07
			They're going through puberty
		
00:50:08 --> 00:50:09
			and they're getting all these
		
00:50:09 --> 00:50:11
			new feelings that they didn't used to have.
		
00:50:11 --> 00:50:13
			You know, they had they experienced
		
00:50:13 --> 00:50:15
			for the first time. Right?
		
00:50:16 --> 00:50:18
			And the says
		
00:50:18 --> 00:50:21
			that men mixing with women is like putting
		
00:50:21 --> 00:50:22
			fire next to wood.
		
00:50:23 --> 00:50:25
			What happens when you put the wood next
		
00:50:25 --> 00:50:27
			to the fire? The the the wood burns.
		
00:50:27 --> 00:50:29
			Same thing. And we're seeing this happening in
		
00:50:29 --> 00:50:31
			the classrooms. Unfortunately, some of these so called
		
00:50:31 --> 00:50:34
			Islamic schools even. It's very sad. They think,
		
00:50:34 --> 00:50:36
			oh, it's Islamic school, but they're putting the
		
00:50:36 --> 00:50:37
			boys and and girls and guess what's happening
		
00:50:37 --> 00:50:39
			now? I'm getting phone calls.
		
00:50:40 --> 00:50:41
			What do I do now? My my son
		
00:50:41 --> 00:50:43
			or my daughter is now in love with
		
00:50:43 --> 00:50:45
			this boy in her class with this girl,
		
00:50:45 --> 00:50:46
			you know, and all this is going on
		
00:50:46 --> 00:50:48
			and they're too young really to get married
		
00:50:48 --> 00:50:49
			yet. Like, they're only
		
00:50:49 --> 00:50:52
			they're only, you know, 15, 16. You know?
		
00:50:52 --> 00:50:54
			We can't say, alright. Get the it's difficult.
		
00:50:54 --> 00:50:55
			You know? It's not
		
00:50:57 --> 00:50:59
			this is what happens. You know? You can't
		
00:50:59 --> 00:51:01
			do that. Yeah. I mean, you you you
		
00:51:01 --> 00:51:03
			know, there's a reason why we have segregation.
		
00:51:03 --> 00:51:04
			Okay?
		
00:51:04 --> 00:51:07
			I'm not saying that they can't have never
		
00:51:07 --> 00:51:08
			see a boy in their life. I'm not
		
00:51:08 --> 00:51:10
			saying that, but I'm just saying don't have
		
00:51:10 --> 00:51:12
			them in the same classroom. They can completely
		
00:51:12 --> 00:51:14
			communicate, you know, all day together.
		
00:51:15 --> 00:51:15
			And,
		
00:51:16 --> 00:51:17
			there's a lot more to say. I'll I'll
		
00:51:17 --> 00:51:18
			keep going because they're gonna call the event
		
00:51:18 --> 00:51:19
			in a minute.
		
00:51:20 --> 00:51:22
			But, look, this is why like, just to
		
00:51:22 --> 00:51:24
			go through some examples in the sunnah, go
		
00:51:24 --> 00:51:26
			reflect on the reflect on the ayats in
		
00:51:26 --> 00:51:27
			the Quran, reflect on the sunnah
		
00:51:28 --> 00:51:30
			of how it calls for making
		
00:51:30 --> 00:51:32
			certain segregation between men and women. It's not
		
00:51:32 --> 00:51:34
			just, like, just get them all together and
		
00:51:34 --> 00:51:36
			hope for the best. No. That's not what
		
00:51:36 --> 00:51:39
			Islam calls for. Right? I mean, for example,
		
00:51:39 --> 00:51:40
			in the Quran,
		
00:51:40 --> 00:51:41
			Allah says,
		
00:51:44 --> 00:51:44
			So
		
00:51:47 --> 00:51:49
			Allah says in this verse, you know, for
		
00:51:49 --> 00:51:51
			women, their default should be their home. Like,
		
00:51:51 --> 00:51:53
			women, it's okay for them to go to
		
00:51:53 --> 00:51:55
			they can go outside. I'm gonna come back
		
00:51:55 --> 00:51:57
			to it in a minute. But, okay, that
		
00:51:57 --> 00:51:58
			she can be a human being. You know,
		
00:51:58 --> 00:51:59
			she can go out of her house and
		
00:51:59 --> 00:52:01
			do things. Okay?
		
00:52:01 --> 00:52:04
			But her default is her home. Like, not
		
00:52:04 --> 00:52:06
			just she's out 247
		
00:52:06 --> 00:52:08
			outside the house and she's at the beach
		
00:52:08 --> 00:52:10
			and she's she's everywhere. Everywhere he looks, she's
		
00:52:10 --> 00:52:13
			outside. You know? You know what I'm trying
		
00:52:13 --> 00:52:15
			to say? You know, just just letting every
		
00:52:15 --> 00:52:18
			you know, that's not, Yani, that's not her
		
00:52:18 --> 00:52:19
			her her place. Right?
		
00:52:19 --> 00:52:20
			But also
		
00:52:20 --> 00:52:22
			that Allah says don't do
		
00:52:23 --> 00:52:23
			like the
		
00:52:24 --> 00:52:25
			of the past. Like, the women would be
		
00:52:25 --> 00:52:26
			all the women would be mixing with the
		
00:52:26 --> 00:52:27
			man outside
		
00:52:28 --> 00:52:29
			and the, you know All like that. She
		
00:52:29 --> 00:52:32
			would they would wear their their their head
		
00:52:32 --> 00:52:33
			veils to the back and show off their
		
00:52:33 --> 00:52:35
			necks and their earrings and,
		
00:52:35 --> 00:52:37
			you know, stamping their feet and try to,
		
00:52:37 --> 00:52:39
			you know, attract men and, like like, this
		
00:52:39 --> 00:52:42
			is Saudi here. Like like, you don't need
		
00:52:42 --> 00:52:44
			even to know about Jahilia. Just look at
		
00:52:44 --> 00:52:45
			Jahilia and you're, you know, outside
		
00:52:46 --> 00:52:47
			and you can see how he shouldn't be.
		
00:52:48 --> 00:52:49
			And you can see how he shouldn't be,
		
00:52:49 --> 00:52:50
			and you can now you can see why
		
00:52:50 --> 00:52:52
			Allah said don't be like that. There's a
		
00:52:52 --> 00:52:54
			reason because do you wanna turn it like
		
00:52:54 --> 00:52:55
			that? Because that's what's gonna happen if we
		
00:52:55 --> 00:52:57
			don't if we don't do these things. Right?
		
00:52:58 --> 00:53:00
			Yeah. Anyway but look at look at the
		
00:53:00 --> 00:53:02
			chastity and fury of of of Islam and
		
00:53:02 --> 00:53:04
			the teachings. Right? For example just give a
		
00:53:04 --> 00:53:04
			few examples.
		
00:53:05 --> 00:53:06
			Right? So the messenger of Allah said,
		
00:53:07 --> 00:53:09
			why did the messenger of Allah say the
		
00:53:09 --> 00:53:10
			best rows
		
00:53:10 --> 00:53:13
			of women please, if you can Yep. Thanks.
		
00:53:13 --> 00:53:15
			The best rows of women are the last
		
00:53:15 --> 00:53:17
			and the worst are the first. Now
		
00:53:18 --> 00:53:20
			why is that? Not not when they're separated,
		
00:53:20 --> 00:53:23
			but when the men are praying directly
		
00:53:24 --> 00:53:26
			the women the men are praying directly in
		
00:53:26 --> 00:53:28
			front of you and there's no, like, barrier,
		
00:53:28 --> 00:53:30
			it's easy for the men to see the
		
00:53:30 --> 00:53:31
			women, you know, if they turn around or
		
00:53:31 --> 00:53:33
			something like that. That's why the woman at
		
00:53:33 --> 00:53:35
			the back will be better because she's more
		
00:53:35 --> 00:53:37
			secluded away from the men. You get me?
		
00:53:37 --> 00:53:39
			It's not always because some people don't understand
		
00:53:39 --> 00:53:41
			these hadiths. They don't understand the context of
		
00:53:41 --> 00:53:42
			these hadiths.
		
00:53:42 --> 00:53:43
			So that's in the case where they're praying
		
00:53:43 --> 00:53:45
			right behind the men. The men can easily
		
00:53:45 --> 00:53:47
			turn around and see her. That's why the
		
00:53:47 --> 00:53:48
			the first row is not as good as
		
00:53:48 --> 00:53:50
			the as the last row in that case.
		
00:53:50 --> 00:53:52
			Right? Even we see the messenger of Allah
		
00:53:52 --> 00:53:54
			when he would pray, he would wait after
		
00:53:54 --> 00:53:55
			the prayer.
		
00:53:55 --> 00:53:57
			He would wait a little while with the
		
00:53:57 --> 00:53:59
			men and allow the women to go. That
		
00:53:59 --> 00:54:00
			was respect.
		
00:54:00 --> 00:54:02
			They had respect. You know, they used to
		
00:54:02 --> 00:54:04
			wait, allow the women to leave, and then
		
00:54:04 --> 00:54:06
			after that, the men would leave. So that
		
00:54:06 --> 00:54:07
			that so that way the men and women
		
00:54:07 --> 00:54:10
			aren't mixing together. Right? When Aisha used to
		
00:54:10 --> 00:54:12
			go to Hajj al Umrah, okay,
		
00:54:12 --> 00:54:15
			she would purposely do Tawaf away from the
		
00:54:15 --> 00:54:16
			men. She wouldn't be right in the middle,
		
00:54:16 --> 00:54:19
			like so if you do Tawaf, for example,
		
00:54:19 --> 00:54:20
			you don't just say, oh, look at all
		
00:54:20 --> 00:54:22
			the Muslims. They were all mixed together. No.
		
00:54:22 --> 00:54:23
			You've got a responsibility. You either have your
		
00:54:23 --> 00:54:26
			Mahram around you, next to you, or you
		
00:54:26 --> 00:54:27
			go around in a group of women so
		
00:54:27 --> 00:54:29
			that you're protected within the group of women.
		
00:54:30 --> 00:54:32
			Not just you walk around freely, like, you
		
00:54:32 --> 00:54:34
			know, you know, dinner stands. So this is
		
00:54:34 --> 00:54:36
			this is the way we implement it. And
		
00:54:37 --> 00:54:39
			and and that's exactly why as well the
		
00:54:39 --> 00:54:41
			messenger of Allah said as well that the
		
00:54:41 --> 00:54:43
			the prayer of the woman in in her
		
00:54:43 --> 00:54:45
			home is more rewardable. Not to say she
		
00:54:45 --> 00:54:47
			can't go to masjid, but it's just more
		
00:54:47 --> 00:54:48
			rewardable for her
		
00:54:48 --> 00:54:51
			to be in her, to pray in her
		
00:54:51 --> 00:54:52
			home. And even if she prayed in her
		
00:54:52 --> 00:54:55
			room, her her bedroom, her private quarters, it's
		
00:54:55 --> 00:54:57
			better than she prayed in the, you know,
		
00:54:57 --> 00:54:59
			the more outer part of her house. Right?
		
00:55:00 --> 00:55:02
			But I wanna add here, this is what
		
00:55:02 --> 00:55:03
			I was talking about a little earlier,
		
00:55:04 --> 00:55:06
			that we have to understand that Islam did
		
00:55:06 --> 00:55:08
			not call call for extreme
		
00:55:08 --> 00:55:09
			over women.
		
00:55:10 --> 00:55:10
			Like,
		
00:55:10 --> 00:55:13
			there should be Like, a man should have
		
00:55:13 --> 00:55:15
			in that like, he wants to like, he's
		
00:55:15 --> 00:55:17
			gonna be asked by Allah about his his
		
00:55:17 --> 00:55:19
			home and his household and all of that,
		
00:55:19 --> 00:55:21
			But there are there's a lot of exaggeration
		
00:55:21 --> 00:55:23
			now, especially now with the red pill movement.
		
00:55:23 --> 00:55:26
			There's a lot of exaggeration about the level
		
00:55:26 --> 00:55:26
			of
		
00:55:27 --> 00:55:28
			this. Right? Like I said before, like, you
		
00:55:28 --> 00:55:30
			can get the point where you got people
		
00:55:30 --> 00:55:32
			telling their wives they can't even go to
		
00:55:32 --> 00:55:34
			the mailbox to get a letter from the
		
00:55:34 --> 00:55:37
			mailbox. I mean, that's that's more extreme than
		
00:55:37 --> 00:55:39
			any of the Sahaba or any go read
		
00:55:39 --> 00:55:42
			the and go and you will see how
		
00:55:42 --> 00:55:43
			they were practicing. That's the best way to
		
00:55:43 --> 00:55:46
			understand your religion. Go read the the Sahabiya,
		
00:55:46 --> 00:55:48
			the Sahaba, how they used to interact with
		
00:55:48 --> 00:55:50
			each other, the the things that they used
		
00:55:50 --> 00:55:51
			to do and that that shows you how
		
00:55:51 --> 00:55:54
			we interact these ayats and hadith. But coming
		
00:55:54 --> 00:55:56
			back to what I was gonna say, Islam
		
00:55:56 --> 00:55:58
			did not call call for extreme of women
		
00:55:58 --> 00:56:00
			where a woman it just becomes invisible. She
		
00:56:00 --> 00:56:01
			can't do anything.
		
00:56:02 --> 00:56:02
			Okay?
		
00:56:03 --> 00:56:05
			And this is exactly why the prophet said,
		
00:56:10 --> 00:56:11
			Right? The messenger of Allah said, do not
		
00:56:11 --> 00:56:14
			forbid the female servants of Allah from going
		
00:56:14 --> 00:56:15
			to the masajid.
		
00:56:16 --> 00:56:18
			Even though their houses are better for them.
		
00:56:18 --> 00:56:19
			Like, if they're gonna get more more reward
		
00:56:19 --> 00:56:21
			if they stay home because it and that's
		
00:56:21 --> 00:56:23
			from the of Allah because it's easier for
		
00:56:23 --> 00:56:24
			you as a woman to pray in your
		
00:56:24 --> 00:56:26
			home. Once you have kids, once you get
		
00:56:26 --> 00:56:28
			married, have kids, you'll find that being being
		
00:56:28 --> 00:56:30
			in your house is so much easier. Like,
		
00:56:30 --> 00:56:31
			oh, no. I wanna go to Hajj or
		
00:56:31 --> 00:56:32
			I go to Umrah.
		
00:56:32 --> 00:56:34
			And the first day I say, I'm gonna
		
00:56:34 --> 00:56:36
			pray 5 times in the in the Haram.
		
00:56:36 --> 00:56:37
			And every time I have to put my
		
00:56:37 --> 00:56:38
			hijab on, I get all ready and I'm
		
00:56:38 --> 00:56:40
			like then I end up just going there
		
00:56:40 --> 00:56:42
			for fudge and and a shirt. Because I
		
00:56:42 --> 00:56:43
			I I I thought I'm time and I
		
00:56:43 --> 00:56:44
			said, oh,
		
00:56:44 --> 00:56:47
			again, like, by day by day 2 or
		
00:56:47 --> 00:56:49
			day 3, I'm too tired to go and
		
00:56:49 --> 00:56:51
			put all my hijab back on. You know
		
00:56:51 --> 00:56:52
			what I'm trying to say so. But anyway,
		
00:56:52 --> 00:56:54
			maybe you're better than me. Maybe you go
		
00:56:54 --> 00:56:55
			for 5 prayers the whole time. But for
		
00:56:55 --> 00:56:56
			me,
		
00:56:57 --> 00:56:58
			that I can just
		
00:56:58 --> 00:57:00
			pray in my home and ensure it's better
		
00:57:00 --> 00:57:01
			for me anyway. Point is,
		
00:57:02 --> 00:57:04
			the messenger of Allah did not he said,
		
00:57:04 --> 00:57:05
			do not forbid
		
00:57:05 --> 00:57:08
			the female servants from going to the masajid.
		
00:57:08 --> 00:57:09
			Right? Even though when they go to masajid,
		
00:57:09 --> 00:57:11
			there's gonna be some kind of mixing a
		
00:57:11 --> 00:57:13
			little bit. Not not mixing, but, you know,
		
00:57:13 --> 00:57:14
			there's gonna be men and women gonna, like,
		
00:57:14 --> 00:57:15
			somehow say each other a bit and stuff
		
00:57:15 --> 00:57:17
			like that. And interestingly,
		
00:57:18 --> 00:57:20
			you know, the wife of Omar Radhi Allahu
		
00:57:20 --> 00:57:21
			Anhu,
		
00:57:23 --> 00:57:24
			Artika, she used to always go and pray
		
00:57:24 --> 00:57:25
			in the masjid.
		
00:57:25 --> 00:57:27
			She used to always go and pray the,
		
00:57:27 --> 00:57:28
			like, for example,
		
00:57:29 --> 00:57:31
			she would go pray in the masjid. Not
		
00:57:31 --> 00:57:33
			every prayer, but she would pray some in
		
00:57:33 --> 00:57:34
			the masjid.
		
00:57:34 --> 00:57:36
			And you know how you know the of?
		
00:57:37 --> 00:57:39
			No one could have more than the way
		
00:57:39 --> 00:57:40
			was. Right?
		
00:57:41 --> 00:57:43
			And and he, you know, and she basically
		
00:57:43 --> 00:57:44
			said,
		
00:57:45 --> 00:57:46
			she said to him,
		
00:57:46 --> 00:57:48
			I will go out unless you forbid me.
		
00:57:48 --> 00:57:50
			I'm gonna keep going to Masjid. Like, I'm
		
00:57:50 --> 00:57:52
			not gonna stop going Masjid unless you forbid
		
00:57:52 --> 00:57:54
			me, and Omar never forbid her.
		
00:57:54 --> 00:57:56
			Umar never forbade her. In fact, they said
		
00:57:56 --> 00:57:57
			that when Umar was assassinated
		
00:57:57 --> 00:57:58
			in the masjid
		
00:57:59 --> 00:58:00
			that they said that she was actually in
		
00:58:00 --> 00:58:01
			the masjid at that time.
		
00:58:03 --> 00:58:05
			But why didn't he forbid? Because he did
		
00:58:05 --> 00:58:06
			not wanna go against
		
00:58:06 --> 00:58:07
			what the prophet
		
00:58:08 --> 00:58:10
			had said. He wasn't gonna go against what
		
00:58:10 --> 00:58:11
			the Rasul said. Right?
		
00:58:12 --> 00:58:14
			Now as I said before,
		
00:58:14 --> 00:58:15
			when you read the,
		
00:58:16 --> 00:58:18
			right, you read the stories of the Sahaba
		
00:58:18 --> 00:58:20
			and the Sahabi'at, you can see there was
		
00:58:20 --> 00:58:21
			a certain amount of interaction.
		
00:58:21 --> 00:58:23
			They used to sometimes ask each other questions.
		
00:58:24 --> 00:58:25
			They would see each other places.
		
00:58:25 --> 00:58:27
			You know, women would go out for their
		
00:58:27 --> 00:58:29
			needs. They would visit their families.
		
00:58:30 --> 00:58:30
			They would
		
00:58:31 --> 00:58:32
			visit their friends.
		
00:58:32 --> 00:58:35
			They would buy and sell. They would go
		
00:58:35 --> 00:58:36
			out for certain
		
00:58:36 --> 00:58:38
			even. They used to go out for certain
		
00:58:38 --> 00:58:38
			campaigns.
		
00:58:39 --> 00:58:41
			Right? So we know that we know that
		
00:58:41 --> 00:58:43
			there was a certain level of interaction, but
		
00:58:43 --> 00:58:45
			if you look at the way they're interacting,
		
00:58:46 --> 00:58:48
			it was all very noble. You know what
		
00:58:48 --> 00:58:50
			I mean? It was very high and pure,
		
00:58:50 --> 00:58:51
			you know, very high and,
		
00:58:52 --> 00:58:52
			pure
		
00:58:53 --> 00:58:55
			like what we had described so far. It's
		
00:58:55 --> 00:58:57
			not like this sitting together laughing and all
		
00:58:57 --> 00:58:59
			of that sort of stuff. Do you understand,
		
00:58:59 --> 00:58:59
			sisters?
		
00:59:00 --> 00:59:02
			Now that's what I'm saying to get the
		
00:59:02 --> 00:59:04
			balance and I just wanna also mention this
		
00:59:04 --> 00:59:06
			beautiful quote by Al Imam Ibn Muqayim Rahim
		
00:59:06 --> 00:59:08
			Allot I really love and always keep this
		
00:59:08 --> 00:59:10
			in your mind when you hear people talking
		
00:59:10 --> 00:59:11
			about the religion.
		
00:59:12 --> 00:59:14
			He says that there in the Sharia is
		
00:59:14 --> 00:59:15
			founded
		
00:59:15 --> 00:59:16
			upon wisdom
		
00:59:17 --> 00:59:18
			and welfare.
		
00:59:19 --> 00:59:20
			So the Maslaha,
		
00:59:20 --> 00:59:21
			right, and hikma
		
00:59:23 --> 00:59:26
			for the servants in this life and the
		
00:59:26 --> 00:59:27
			next. So the whole sharia
		
00:59:28 --> 00:59:30
			is founded and based
		
00:59:30 --> 00:59:31
			upon
		
00:59:31 --> 00:59:32
			hikmah, wisdom,
		
00:59:33 --> 00:59:33
			and also
		
00:59:34 --> 00:59:36
			the welfare, like what's good for the servants.
		
00:59:36 --> 00:59:40
			Right? And he said its entirety is justice,
		
00:59:40 --> 00:59:41
			adil,
		
00:59:42 --> 00:59:43
			and mercy, wahma,
		
00:59:44 --> 00:59:45
			and benefit
		
00:59:46 --> 00:59:48
			and wisdom, hikmah. Right?
		
00:59:48 --> 00:59:50
			Now listen to this. He says,
		
00:59:51 --> 00:59:54
			whenever you find or every matter that abandons
		
00:59:54 --> 00:59:56
			justice towards a dun
		
00:59:56 --> 01:00:00
			right? Every everything that calls towards leaves justice
		
01:00:00 --> 01:00:01
			is not just anymore
		
01:00:01 --> 01:00:02
			and calls towards
		
01:00:03 --> 01:00:04
			oppression
		
01:00:05 --> 01:00:08
			or leaves mercy and goes towards cruelty
		
01:00:09 --> 01:00:10
			and harshness
		
01:00:11 --> 01:00:13
			or leaves benefit for corruption
		
01:00:14 --> 01:00:15
			or leaves wisdom for foolishness,
		
01:00:16 --> 01:00:17
			that's not part of the Sharia.
		
01:00:18 --> 01:00:20
			Even if it was introduced therein by an
		
01:00:20 --> 01:00:22
			interpretation. Even if someone comes and says I've
		
01:00:22 --> 01:00:23
			got a for this.
		
01:00:24 --> 01:00:25
			You understand? So if you if you if
		
01:00:25 --> 01:00:27
			you see someone coming in and and coming
		
01:00:27 --> 01:00:29
			with a but you can see that that
		
01:00:29 --> 01:00:31
			is so extreme. Like, always remember, Islam is
		
01:00:31 --> 01:00:34
			the most balanced religion between the extremes. It's
		
01:00:34 --> 01:00:34
			never
		
01:00:35 --> 01:00:36
			you understand? It's
		
01:00:36 --> 01:00:39
			never too extreme this way or too extreme
		
01:00:39 --> 01:00:40
			that way. Like, it's it's it's it's somehow
		
01:00:40 --> 01:00:43
			the laws of the Sharia are are given
		
01:00:43 --> 01:00:45
			for us to be able to interact in
		
01:00:45 --> 01:00:47
			this world, not so that we cannot interact
		
01:00:47 --> 01:00:48
			in this world.
		
01:00:49 --> 01:00:52
			Okay. So now we come to how do
		
01:00:52 --> 01:00:55
			I apply these guidelines in today's society. So
		
01:00:55 --> 01:00:57
			I hope I've given you a very
		
01:00:58 --> 01:00:59
			powerful
		
01:00:59 --> 01:01:01
			framework for you to understand the way you
		
01:01:01 --> 01:01:03
			interact now. Most of the questions that you
		
01:01:03 --> 01:01:04
			had, hopefully,
		
01:01:04 --> 01:01:06
			you can kind of have an idea now
		
01:01:06 --> 01:01:08
			of how you're supposed to conduct yourself.
		
01:01:09 --> 01:01:12
			But what we always say to Allah says
		
01:01:12 --> 01:01:12
			in the Quran,
		
01:01:15 --> 01:01:16
			You know, fear Allah as much as you
		
01:01:16 --> 01:01:17
			are able,
		
01:01:17 --> 01:01:18
			you know,
		
01:01:19 --> 01:01:20
			and
		
01:01:21 --> 01:01:24
			and. Don't follow the footsteps of shaitan because
		
01:01:24 --> 01:01:27
			when you follow the footsteps of shaitan, you
		
01:01:27 --> 01:01:28
			end up falling into the Haram.
		
01:01:29 --> 01:01:30
			Alright?
		
01:01:30 --> 01:01:33
			So that's that's what I can basically say
		
01:01:33 --> 01:01:34
			in relation to,
		
01:01:35 --> 01:01:37
			you know, the the interaction of of the
		
01:01:37 --> 01:01:39
			genders, the way to navigate it is in
		
01:01:39 --> 01:01:41
			in in within this framework.
		
01:01:41 --> 01:01:43
			And now it's just a matter of taking
		
01:01:43 --> 01:01:46
			the specific points or the specific
		
01:01:47 --> 01:01:47
			scenarios
		
01:01:48 --> 01:01:50
			and then how do you apply it on
		
01:01:50 --> 01:01:51
			that scenario.
		
01:01:51 --> 01:01:51
			Right?
		
01:01:52 --> 01:01:52
			So,
		
01:01:53 --> 01:01:55
			if you wanna maybe ask a few questions
		
01:01:56 --> 01:01:57
			in please try to stick to the topic
		
01:01:57 --> 01:02:00
			so we just focus on today's topic.
		
01:02:00 --> 01:02:01
			And I do have some
		
01:02:02 --> 01:02:04
			I do have some points that I asked
		
01:02:04 --> 01:02:05
			my class as well
		
01:02:06 --> 01:02:08
			to give me some, you know, some
		
01:02:09 --> 01:02:09
			points,
		
01:02:10 --> 01:02:13
			like things that we can take into consideration
		
01:02:13 --> 01:02:15
			or the things that they wanted to know
		
01:02:15 --> 01:02:15
			about.
		
01:02:16 --> 01:02:17
			We can maybe go through that as well
		
01:02:17 --> 01:02:20
			while you're thinking about, questions that you have.
		
01:02:24 --> 01:02:27
			So one of them was, you know, how
		
01:02:27 --> 01:02:29
			to interact with male relatives
		
01:02:29 --> 01:02:30
			that are non mahrams.
		
01:02:31 --> 01:02:33
			Right? You have a a male relative who's
		
01:02:33 --> 01:02:34
			not who's not a to you. Like, it
		
01:02:34 --> 01:02:36
			could be your brother-in-law, could be,
		
01:02:37 --> 01:02:38
			your auntie's husband,
		
01:02:40 --> 01:02:42
			a cousin, something like that.
		
01:02:42 --> 01:02:45
			You know, someone's asking, can we say hello
		
01:02:45 --> 01:02:47
			and to what extent you're able to communicate?
		
01:02:47 --> 01:02:48
			And like I said, it's not that you
		
01:02:48 --> 01:02:50
			can't communicate.
		
01:02:50 --> 01:02:52
			You can communicate as long as there's no
		
01:02:52 --> 01:02:53
			fear of fitna. Obviously, if you feel like
		
01:02:53 --> 01:02:55
			he keeps looking at you in a strange
		
01:02:55 --> 01:02:56
			way,
		
01:02:56 --> 01:02:57
			then we can say that, okay. I think
		
01:02:57 --> 01:02:59
			I better I better distance myself a bit
		
01:02:59 --> 01:03:01
			more. You know? But if it's just normal
		
01:03:01 --> 01:03:02
			relationship, you know, know, so I come how
		
01:03:02 --> 01:03:03
			are you,
		
01:03:03 --> 01:03:05
			you know, just so I come how are
		
01:03:05 --> 01:03:07
			you? I hope you're well, inshallah. You know,
		
01:03:07 --> 01:03:08
			just basic, you know,
		
01:03:09 --> 01:03:13
			etiquettes, manners, you know, without being too personal,
		
01:03:13 --> 01:03:14
			but just
		
01:03:14 --> 01:03:15
			do you know do you know what I'm
		
01:03:15 --> 01:03:17
			trying to say? Being a human being. Being
		
01:03:17 --> 01:03:19
			a human being, basically. Alright?
		
01:03:20 --> 01:03:22
			And then they were asking, you know,
		
01:03:22 --> 01:03:23
			what about the repercussions
		
01:03:23 --> 01:03:27
			of not segregating in family settings? Okay. So,
		
01:03:27 --> 01:03:28
			like, we know that a lot of families,
		
01:03:28 --> 01:03:30
			they wanna sit sit together. Like, they wanna
		
01:03:30 --> 01:03:32
			bring their family together, and I understand that,
		
01:03:32 --> 01:03:34
			but what we have to do then if
		
01:03:34 --> 01:03:35
			we're gonna be if we are gonna be
		
01:03:35 --> 01:03:37
			in that situation because a lot you know,
		
01:03:37 --> 01:03:39
			you you can control your own immediate family,
		
01:03:39 --> 01:03:41
			but then you go to other people's houses.
		
01:03:41 --> 01:03:43
			They don't they're not the same as you.
		
01:03:43 --> 01:03:44
			You know? But at least
		
01:03:45 --> 01:03:47
			have the the men and women not who
		
01:03:47 --> 01:03:49
			are not married to each other, not facing
		
01:03:49 --> 01:03:49
			each other.
		
01:03:50 --> 01:03:52
			Okay? So and and if possible, have the
		
01:03:52 --> 01:03:53
			women in, like you know, they could be
		
01:03:53 --> 01:03:55
			in the same lounge room, but women on
		
01:03:55 --> 01:03:57
			one side together talking, men on the other
		
01:03:57 --> 01:04:00
			side, you know, and and ideally have
		
01:04:01 --> 01:04:02
			have so the men and women women are
		
01:04:02 --> 01:04:05
			not like, who are not married facing each
		
01:04:05 --> 01:04:06
			other. You understand? So that, like, if you're
		
01:04:06 --> 01:04:07
			sitting at the table,
		
01:04:08 --> 01:04:09
			you don't have the ones that are not
		
01:04:09 --> 01:04:11
			married, you know, married to each other facing
		
01:04:11 --> 01:04:12
			each other where they can stare at each
		
01:04:12 --> 01:04:13
			other and
		
01:04:13 --> 01:04:15
			and then how are they talking at the
		
01:04:15 --> 01:04:16
			table? They're not, like the ones who are
		
01:04:16 --> 01:04:18
			not married to each other, they don't interact
		
01:04:18 --> 01:04:21
			like normal. You you understand? Like, they will
		
01:04:21 --> 01:04:22
			be limited. They won't
		
01:04:23 --> 01:04:24
			there'll be limited
		
01:04:25 --> 01:04:26
			interaction with the way that they are, you
		
01:04:26 --> 01:04:28
			know, dealing with each other. Right?
		
01:04:31 --> 01:04:33
			So that's what I can say about that.
		
01:04:36 --> 01:04:38
			Obviously, you can't be hugging non Muslim non
		
01:04:38 --> 01:04:41
			non Mahrams. You obviously can't hug. Like someone's
		
01:04:41 --> 01:04:43
			asking me, what do I do when I
		
01:04:43 --> 01:04:45
			have non who wanna come and hug me
		
01:04:45 --> 01:04:47
			and they wanna touch me freely and they
		
01:04:47 --> 01:04:48
			come too close to us, they come close
		
01:04:48 --> 01:04:51
			to our children? Like, look, we're we're allowed
		
01:04:51 --> 01:04:51
			to have boundaries.
		
01:04:52 --> 01:04:53
			And I think that, you know, it's it's
		
01:04:53 --> 01:04:55
			interesting that COVID even
		
01:04:56 --> 01:04:58
			made us realize that it's okay to have
		
01:04:58 --> 01:04:59
			boundaries.
		
01:05:00 --> 01:05:01
			Like, before that, a lot of Muslims were
		
01:05:01 --> 01:05:04
			too shy to actually establish boundaries for themselves.
		
01:05:04 --> 01:05:07
			There's nothing wrong with placing some boundaries because
		
01:05:08 --> 01:05:10
			if you don't have boundaries, it's like it's
		
01:05:10 --> 01:05:11
			not comfortable. Like,
		
01:05:11 --> 01:05:13
			now even in the workplace, you know, go
		
01:05:13 --> 01:05:14
			back quite quite a few years ago, let
		
01:05:14 --> 01:05:16
			me tell you because I remember years ago
		
01:05:16 --> 01:05:17
			and I was I used to work. By
		
01:05:17 --> 01:05:18
			the way, I have worked. A lot of
		
01:05:18 --> 01:05:20
			people who give these talks, can I just
		
01:05:20 --> 01:05:21
			say,
		
01:05:21 --> 01:05:23
			have never walked worked in a normal workplace
		
01:05:24 --> 01:05:26
			and they've never studied in a normal university
		
01:05:26 --> 01:05:28
			setting? I've done both of those. I have
		
01:05:28 --> 01:05:30
			worked in a normal Australian workplace
		
01:05:31 --> 01:05:34
			and I'm also full time and and I've
		
01:05:34 --> 01:05:36
			also, studied at university too. So what I'm
		
01:05:36 --> 01:05:38
			speaking about, I'm not speaking about,
		
01:05:39 --> 01:05:41
			you know, I'm not just talking about theoretical
		
01:05:41 --> 01:05:43
			here. I'm speaking about practical. I studied university.
		
01:05:43 --> 01:05:45
			I studied my degree even though I was
		
01:05:45 --> 01:05:47
			wearing a The second time I went back
		
01:05:47 --> 01:05:49
			to university, I was wearing a and I
		
01:05:49 --> 01:05:50
			used to just make sure I always sat
		
01:05:50 --> 01:05:51
			away from the men.
		
01:05:52 --> 01:05:53
			You know, usually, I sit at the back
		
01:05:53 --> 01:05:54
			of the the room,
		
01:05:54 --> 01:05:56
			away from the men, sit with the sisters.
		
01:05:56 --> 01:05:57
			There's there's a way to conduct yourself.
		
01:05:58 --> 01:05:59
			Okay? It's not like if you go to
		
01:05:59 --> 01:06:01
			uni, you can't conduct yourself. Yes. You can.
		
01:06:01 --> 01:06:03
			Anyone here who's been to uni, and I
		
01:06:03 --> 01:06:05
			know because I go into and speak to
		
01:06:05 --> 01:06:07
			the sisters. I go I get invited all
		
01:06:07 --> 01:06:08
			the time by the MSAs.
		
01:06:08 --> 01:06:10
			And sometimes you can find the sisters there
		
01:06:10 --> 01:06:12
			are more practicing than outside the university. So
		
01:06:12 --> 01:06:14
			I get very upset when I hear people
		
01:06:14 --> 01:06:16
			say, oh, women can't go to university and
		
01:06:16 --> 01:06:17
			they're gonna get corrupted and all that. No.
		
01:06:17 --> 01:06:19
			It depends on the woman. If the woman
		
01:06:19 --> 01:06:20
			is strong, she knows herself.
		
01:06:20 --> 01:06:22
			There's no reason why she has to be
		
01:06:22 --> 01:06:24
			corrupted. We have MSAs that help the sisters
		
01:06:24 --> 01:06:26
			to you know, and brothers. Not just sisters,
		
01:06:26 --> 01:06:28
			brothers. Brothers can get corrupted too.
		
01:06:29 --> 01:06:29
			Okay?
		
01:06:30 --> 01:06:32
			So there's ways of of conducting ourselves. And
		
01:06:32 --> 01:06:35
			the same okay. Another, okay. Another question I
		
01:06:35 --> 01:06:36
			had was, you know, about women in the
		
01:06:36 --> 01:06:37
			workplace.
		
01:06:38 --> 01:06:39
			Women in the workplace.
		
01:06:39 --> 01:06:40
			Now
		
01:06:40 --> 01:06:42
			it's allowed for a woman to work. It's
		
01:06:42 --> 01:06:44
			allowed for a woman to work. Right? But
		
01:06:44 --> 01:06:46
			how is the work? Even for a man,
		
01:06:47 --> 01:06:48
			men can't just work anywhere.
		
01:06:49 --> 01:06:51
			They have to make sure that that that
		
01:06:51 --> 01:06:53
			that workplace that they choose is not in
		
01:06:53 --> 01:06:55
			con in contradiction to their religion.
		
01:06:55 --> 01:06:57
			Like, if they're working in a workplace where
		
01:06:57 --> 01:06:59
			this woman keep coming in with, like, half
		
01:06:59 --> 01:07:01
			naked every single day, he needs to change
		
01:07:01 --> 01:07:03
			his workplace. It's not a good workplace for
		
01:07:03 --> 01:07:03
			him.
		
01:07:03 --> 01:07:04
			Okay?
		
01:07:05 --> 01:07:06
			And the same thing for a woman. If
		
01:07:06 --> 01:07:08
			she has to constantly be touching men or,
		
01:07:08 --> 01:07:10
			like, she's being alone with men or like,
		
01:07:10 --> 01:07:12
			that's not a right that's not a right
		
01:07:12 --> 01:07:12
			place for her.
		
01:07:13 --> 01:07:15
			So you try to find a workplace where
		
01:07:15 --> 01:07:18
			you're mainly dealing only with women as much
		
01:07:18 --> 01:07:18
			as possible.
		
01:07:19 --> 01:07:21
			Alright? And, obviously, as well
		
01:07:22 --> 01:07:23
			as well,
		
01:07:24 --> 01:07:26
			you know, obviously, again, what did we say
		
01:07:26 --> 01:07:28
			before about the default is our our household.
		
01:07:28 --> 01:07:29
			Like, we don't wanna go to work and
		
01:07:29 --> 01:07:32
			our whole household is falling apart, our kids
		
01:07:32 --> 01:07:33
			are falling apart. You know, so we have
		
01:07:33 --> 01:07:35
			to balance everything. Some people have no choice.
		
01:07:35 --> 01:07:37
			They you know, it's paramount, like, make everything
		
01:07:37 --> 01:07:39
			easy for everybody. This I have so many
		
01:07:39 --> 01:07:39
			friends,
		
01:07:40 --> 01:07:42
			make it make it easy for them. Like,
		
01:07:42 --> 01:07:43
			they have to try to be both the
		
01:07:43 --> 01:07:45
			father and the mother for their children. It's
		
01:07:45 --> 01:07:46
			a very difficult thing.
		
01:07:47 --> 01:07:48
			And a lot of women don't have the
		
01:07:48 --> 01:07:50
			choice. They have to go to work. Right?
		
01:07:50 --> 01:07:51
			But you try to choose the best work
		
01:07:51 --> 01:07:54
			environment that doesn't compromise your dean as much
		
01:07:54 --> 01:07:55
			as possible. Right? And that's the same thing
		
01:07:55 --> 01:07:57
			for men. It's not just women, for men
		
01:07:57 --> 01:07:57
			too.
		
01:07:58 --> 01:08:00
			But obviously, if we have the choice,
		
01:08:00 --> 01:08:03
			then obviously we we wanna try to, you
		
01:08:03 --> 01:08:05
			know, be in the home as much especially
		
01:08:05 --> 01:08:06
			with the kids who are growing up. The
		
01:08:06 --> 01:08:08
			kids, they need us to be around. Like,
		
01:08:08 --> 01:08:09
			I know because I'm talking about from an
		
01:08:09 --> 01:08:11
			Australian background. I'm from an Australian background. My
		
01:08:11 --> 01:08:12
			mom was home,
		
01:08:13 --> 01:08:14
			and I had a friend who her mom
		
01:08:14 --> 01:08:16
			wasn't home. She was always at work and
		
01:08:16 --> 01:08:17
			she had no clue what her daughter was
		
01:08:17 --> 01:08:19
			doing after school. And let me tell you,
		
01:08:19 --> 01:08:20
			it wasn't good stuff.
		
01:08:21 --> 01:08:23
			Because, you know, she's never home. She wasn't
		
01:08:23 --> 01:08:25
			home. I'm talking look. Some women, I'm not
		
01:08:25 --> 01:08:26
			sure they have beautiful jobs where they're home
		
01:08:26 --> 01:08:28
			by the time their kids come home. That's
		
01:08:28 --> 01:08:30
			amazing. That's ideal. And that's the kind of
		
01:08:30 --> 01:08:31
			job you look for if you had to
		
01:08:31 --> 01:08:32
			work or you wanted to if you want
		
01:08:32 --> 01:08:34
			to work. We're not saying you you only
		
01:08:34 --> 01:08:35
			have to work. It's allowed for women to
		
01:08:35 --> 01:08:37
			work. But just she has to look at
		
01:08:37 --> 01:08:38
			what kind of workplace.
		
01:08:39 --> 01:08:39
			Right?
		
01:08:41 --> 01:08:43
			So that's all I can say about that.
		
01:08:46 --> 01:08:47
			Who who wants to ask some questions?
		
01:08:49 --> 01:08:50
			Anybody wanna ask some questions? I'm just trying
		
01:08:50 --> 01:08:52
			to cover a few things. Yes. Can you
		
01:08:52 --> 01:08:55
			comment and, take a few about your social
		
01:08:55 --> 01:08:56
			media and other Oh, yeah.
		
01:08:58 --> 01:08:59
			Yeah. If I can just listen to the
		
01:08:59 --> 01:09:01
			sister, if you don't mind sisters, she's, if
		
01:09:01 --> 01:09:03
			we listen listen to everybody, we can learn
		
01:09:03 --> 01:09:04
			from other people.
		
01:09:04 --> 01:09:06
			Say thank you. Yeah. You're welcome. That our
		
01:09:06 --> 01:09:08
			social media is hard. Yeah. Because we can't
		
01:09:08 --> 01:09:09
			unfortunately,
		
01:09:09 --> 01:09:10
			it is
		
01:09:11 --> 01:09:13
			a day and time now. Yeah.
		
01:09:13 --> 01:09:15
			It's a comment that I've made into my
		
01:09:15 --> 01:09:18
			husband where you're scrolling through, and you do
		
01:09:18 --> 01:09:21
			see beautiful regenerative sisters Yeah. Whether they have
		
01:09:21 --> 01:09:24
			the business, but they're Yeah. Naughty mad there.
		
01:09:24 --> 01:09:27
			Yeah. But truth be told, I find it
		
01:09:27 --> 01:09:28
			seductive.
		
01:09:28 --> 01:09:30
			Yeah. Of course it is.
		
01:09:30 --> 01:09:32
			To even tell my husband and say, look.
		
01:09:32 --> 01:09:36
			Just watch the pages because this algorithm Yeah.
		
01:09:36 --> 01:09:37
			Come up. Yep.
		
01:09:37 --> 01:09:38
			It's upsetting.
		
01:09:39 --> 01:09:41
			Yep. And it's it's quite hard to
		
01:09:42 --> 01:09:44
			raise a teenage
		
01:09:44 --> 01:09:47
			daughter with boundaries and Yeah. With all of
		
01:09:47 --> 01:09:47
			these.
		
01:09:48 --> 01:09:49
			I don't know
		
01:09:50 --> 01:09:53
			if and it's probably better coming from a
		
01:09:53 --> 01:09:54
			woman. We don't wanna hear it from a
		
01:09:54 --> 01:09:56
			woman. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know what the
		
01:09:56 --> 01:09:58
			what what is it? Is it is it
		
01:09:58 --> 01:09:59
			the intention
		
01:09:59 --> 01:10:01
			and you can't judge me kind of things?
		
01:10:01 --> 01:10:02
			I didn't know what the education
		
01:10:03 --> 01:10:05
			will be from here Yes. Onwards for this.
		
01:10:05 --> 01:10:08
			So look. I mean, like, I mean and
		
01:10:08 --> 01:10:09
			that's what I say to you as well.
		
01:10:09 --> 01:10:11
			I find we always hear
		
01:10:12 --> 01:10:14
			we always hear the onus is on the
		
01:10:14 --> 01:10:15
			women, but it's also on the men. Like,
		
01:10:15 --> 01:10:17
			you know, if I have a man come
		
01:10:17 --> 01:10:19
			and tell me that, oh, you need to
		
01:10:19 --> 01:10:20
			cover your eyes, I'll say, what do you
		
01:10:20 --> 01:10:21
			even do on Instagram?
		
01:10:22 --> 01:10:24
			Yeah. You know? What do you even do
		
01:10:24 --> 01:10:25
			on Instagram? Why are you even following a
		
01:10:25 --> 01:10:26
			woman's page?
		
01:10:27 --> 01:10:29
			Go look at go look at go follow
		
01:10:29 --> 01:10:30
			men's pages.
		
01:10:30 --> 01:10:32
			Don't don't follow my page.
		
01:10:32 --> 01:10:34
			But in saying that, I mean, you need
		
01:10:34 --> 01:10:35
			to do your you need to do your
		
01:10:35 --> 01:10:37
			site. You know? You can't just be, like
		
01:10:37 --> 01:10:39
			Ella said before, pulling all these strange faces,
		
01:10:39 --> 01:10:42
			putting all this makeup on, doing a dance,
		
01:10:42 --> 01:10:44
			and saying, oh, the men shouldn't follow me.
		
01:10:44 --> 01:10:46
			No. That's exactly like if you went out
		
01:10:46 --> 01:10:48
			straight side in the street and started doing
		
01:10:48 --> 01:10:49
			a belly dance
		
01:10:49 --> 01:10:51
			in the middle of, like, Halden Street and
		
01:10:51 --> 01:10:53
			say, no one should look at me. It's
		
01:10:53 --> 01:10:55
			it's up to me. Like, look. You know
		
01:10:55 --> 01:10:58
			the problem is? The a western mindset is
		
01:10:59 --> 01:11:00
			it's it's, you know, it's my choice. It's
		
01:11:00 --> 01:11:02
			all about me and what I do. It's
		
01:11:02 --> 01:11:04
			about the individual. But Islam doesn't look at
		
01:11:04 --> 01:11:07
			it like that. Like, Islam actually looks at,
		
01:11:07 --> 01:11:07
			like,
		
01:11:08 --> 01:11:10
			the whole Sharia actually looks at not
		
01:11:10 --> 01:11:13
			just at the individual, but also the, like,
		
01:11:13 --> 01:11:15
			the individual has a right in Islam, but
		
01:11:15 --> 01:11:18
			the the community and the ummah and the
		
01:11:18 --> 01:11:18
			society,
		
01:11:19 --> 01:11:21
			they they also have a right. You understand?
		
01:11:21 --> 01:11:23
			So you can't also just do whatever you
		
01:11:23 --> 01:11:26
			like because what you do has an impact
		
01:11:26 --> 01:11:27
			on the society.
		
01:11:27 --> 01:11:29
			Right? So this is why we have to
		
01:11:29 --> 01:11:30
			see each other as not just individuals.
		
01:11:31 --> 01:11:32
			We have to see each other as, like,
		
01:11:32 --> 01:11:34
			pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, you could say,
		
01:11:35 --> 01:11:36
			that we all have a a role to
		
01:11:36 --> 01:11:37
			play
		
01:11:37 --> 01:11:39
			in upholding the moral code
		
01:11:40 --> 01:11:41
			of the Muslim community.
		
01:11:42 --> 01:11:44
			Yeah? And that's what it is. And that's
		
01:11:44 --> 01:11:46
			why those a lot of women on social
		
01:11:46 --> 01:11:48
			media, they they don't understand that. They because
		
01:11:48 --> 01:11:49
			they've been brought up in the west, and
		
01:11:49 --> 01:11:51
			they've got they've got brainwashed
		
01:11:51 --> 01:11:54
			in that mindset of I I can do
		
01:11:54 --> 01:11:56
			whatever I like. I'm free. It's between me
		
01:11:56 --> 01:11:59
			and Allah. It no one can tell me
		
01:11:59 --> 01:12:00
			what to do. It's between me and Allah.
		
01:12:00 --> 01:12:02
			That's what they say. Right?
		
01:12:02 --> 01:12:05
			But, no, they're gonna be judged they're gonna
		
01:12:05 --> 01:12:07
			be judged based upon the impact.
		
01:12:07 --> 01:12:09
			That's why did the messenger of Allah say
		
01:12:09 --> 01:12:11
			that that woman's free to go wear perfume?
		
01:12:12 --> 01:12:13
			If she puts on a strong perfume, what
		
01:12:13 --> 01:12:15
			did he say about the woman who goes
		
01:12:15 --> 01:12:16
			out with a strong perfume? Did he say,
		
01:12:16 --> 01:12:18
			oh, she's free. It's between her and Allah.
		
01:12:19 --> 01:12:21
			He didn't say that. He said she she
		
01:12:21 --> 01:12:23
			she is she takes a share. She takes
		
01:12:23 --> 01:12:25
			a share of the the sin
		
01:12:26 --> 01:12:28
			of the men who got seduced by her
		
01:12:28 --> 01:12:30
			or thought about her in a in a
		
01:12:30 --> 01:12:31
			haram way.
		
01:12:31 --> 01:12:32
			Right?
		
01:12:32 --> 01:12:34
			So it's it's not just about it's not
		
01:12:34 --> 01:12:36
			just about, you know,
		
01:12:37 --> 01:12:39
			what like, me me, myself, and I.
		
01:12:40 --> 01:12:42
			It's about you you've gotta always think about
		
01:12:42 --> 01:12:44
			when I do an action, how is that
		
01:12:44 --> 01:12:45
			gonna impact on other people?
		
01:12:46 --> 01:12:48
			Right? It's the same thing when women go
		
01:12:48 --> 01:12:50
			on social media and take off their hijab.
		
01:12:51 --> 01:12:53
			Everybody, look, everybody has their struggles. Right? We're
		
01:12:53 --> 01:12:56
			not gonna judge people for their struggles, but
		
01:12:56 --> 01:12:58
			we will we will have something to say
		
01:12:58 --> 01:12:59
			if they go on there and say, look,
		
01:12:59 --> 01:13:00
			everybody.
		
01:13:00 --> 01:13:02
			I took off my hijab,
		
01:13:02 --> 01:13:04
			and now I'm living the best life ever.
		
01:13:05 --> 01:13:07
			I'm sorry. You can't just do that. You,
		
01:13:07 --> 01:13:08
			you know, you you doing that. You have
		
01:13:08 --> 01:13:10
			an impact on others. Yes. Exactly. You have
		
01:13:10 --> 01:13:12
			an impact on others. Exactly. So it's not
		
01:13:12 --> 01:13:13
			just about you.
		
01:13:14 --> 01:13:15
			Right? So this is what this is what,
		
01:13:15 --> 01:13:16
			you know, this is what Islam looks at.
		
01:13:16 --> 01:13:18
			It's not just don't be so
		
01:13:18 --> 01:13:20
			selfish. Like, that's what you know, the western
		
01:13:20 --> 01:13:23
			western culture I know. I'm a I'm a
		
01:13:23 --> 01:13:24
			westerner. Okay?
		
01:13:24 --> 01:13:26
			Western culture is it's really just all about
		
01:13:26 --> 01:13:28
			it just makes you only focus on yourself.
		
01:13:29 --> 01:13:30
			You know? And what, you know, what's good
		
01:13:30 --> 01:13:32
			for me, that's what's important. I didn't care
		
01:13:32 --> 01:13:35
			less about anybody else. That's not what Islam
		
01:13:39 --> 01:13:39
			Uh-huh.
		
01:13:40 --> 01:13:41
			You don't say it in Arabic. Oh, yeah.
		
01:13:41 --> 01:13:43
			Of course. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If you wanna
		
01:13:43 --> 01:13:44
			do like, she's saying if you wanna do
		
01:13:44 --> 01:13:45
			a sin
		
01:13:45 --> 01:13:47
			doing a sin is one thing. Like, you
		
01:13:47 --> 01:13:49
			understand, doing a sin is one thing. If
		
01:13:49 --> 01:13:50
			it's just a secret sin, you conceal it.
		
01:13:50 --> 01:13:53
			Islam teaches us to conceal our sins,
		
01:13:53 --> 01:13:56
			but doing it openly and proudly, that's that
		
01:13:56 --> 01:13:59
			makes the sin far far far worse. Like
		
01:13:59 --> 01:14:01
			the the punishment for it is far far
		
01:14:01 --> 01:14:03
			worse than if you just did it secretly
		
01:14:03 --> 01:14:05
			and you did it humbly, like a woman
		
01:14:05 --> 01:14:07
			was really struggling and I'm not, you know,
		
01:14:07 --> 01:14:10
			inshallah, Allah keeps everyone steadfast, but just say
		
01:14:10 --> 01:14:12
			she was genuinely struggling and she just couldn't
		
01:14:12 --> 01:14:14
			with a hijab, for example, but she went
		
01:14:14 --> 01:14:15
			about it in a humble way. She didn't
		
01:14:15 --> 01:14:18
			go promoting it, you know, she was upset
		
01:14:18 --> 01:14:20
			and she felt so bad and, you know,
		
01:14:20 --> 01:14:22
			for example, that woman's not gonna be no
		
01:14:22 --> 01:14:23
			way on the same level as someone who
		
01:14:23 --> 01:14:25
			goes on, like, for example, social social media
		
01:14:25 --> 01:14:27
			like some of them do and they make
		
01:14:27 --> 01:14:29
			a statement and then the next day you
		
01:14:29 --> 01:14:30
			see them all happy and living a better
		
01:14:30 --> 01:14:32
			life that so called in, you know
		
01:14:33 --> 01:14:35
			and the next thing, you know, not only
		
01:14:35 --> 01:14:36
			are they doing that, but then now they're
		
01:14:36 --> 01:14:38
			mixing with the man, sitting down, laughing and
		
01:14:38 --> 01:14:41
			chatting and, like, it's not it doesn't just
		
01:14:41 --> 01:14:42
			stop with taking off their jabber. It goes
		
01:14:42 --> 01:14:44
			on and on. It goes into everything else.
		
01:14:44 --> 01:14:44
			You know?
		
01:14:45 --> 01:14:45
			Anyway,
		
01:14:46 --> 01:14:48
			anyone else got any, questions?
		
01:14:50 --> 01:14:52
			If you wanna understand anything, we can
		
01:14:54 --> 01:14:56
			Oh, the questions. Oh, yeah. Okay. The okay.
		
01:14:56 --> 01:14:57
			Okay. Yeah.
		
01:14:58 --> 01:14:58
			Alright.
		
01:15:03 --> 01:15:06
			So, yeah, so when you're watching, TV shows,
		
01:15:06 --> 01:15:08
			like, see. So again, like,
		
01:15:09 --> 01:15:10
			you know, it's it's
		
01:15:11 --> 01:15:14
			how we judge things is depending on on
		
01:15:14 --> 01:15:14
			the content.
		
01:15:15 --> 01:15:16
			Do you know what I mean? Like, if
		
01:15:16 --> 01:15:18
			it's just normal content, it could be okay.
		
01:15:18 --> 01:15:20
			But, obviously, if there's, like, intimate kissing,
		
01:15:21 --> 01:15:22
			then we have to turn our sights away.
		
01:15:22 --> 01:15:24
			We have to fast forward. Like, we shouldn't
		
01:15:24 --> 01:15:27
			just watch intimate kissing and or, like, intimacy
		
01:15:28 --> 01:15:30
			between, you know, or, like, nakedness, like, and
		
01:15:30 --> 01:15:32
			just watch it like it's nothing. You know?
		
01:15:32 --> 01:15:34
			It it it will have an effect on
		
01:15:34 --> 01:15:35
			our hearts as well.
		
01:15:36 --> 01:15:37
			Right? So that's how you that's how you
		
01:15:37 --> 01:15:40
			weigh up whether it's suitable. And sometimes you
		
01:15:40 --> 01:15:41
			have to filter it out. Like, you have
		
01:15:41 --> 01:15:43
			to fast forward. You have to maybe turn
		
01:15:43 --> 01:15:44
			off the TV during that, you know, and
		
01:15:44 --> 01:15:46
			maybe the rest of the show is okay.
		
01:15:46 --> 01:15:48
			But, you know, that's why you have to
		
01:15:48 --> 01:15:49
			you have to you know, we can't just
		
01:15:49 --> 01:15:52
			watch it. Because if if you watch it,
		
01:15:52 --> 01:15:54
			what's gonna happen is you become desensitized. And
		
01:15:54 --> 01:15:56
			you've and it becomes like nothing to you
		
01:15:56 --> 01:15:58
			anymore. What if you want more and you
		
01:15:58 --> 01:16:01
			have some boundaries? So if you want to
		
01:16:01 --> 01:16:03
			see the numb hem on the It's it's
		
01:16:03 --> 01:16:05
			again, as I said to you, it's okay
		
01:16:05 --> 01:16:06
			as long as there's no attraction. Like, if
		
01:16:06 --> 01:16:08
			you like, you can watch the news or
		
01:16:08 --> 01:16:10
			you can watch a show. You know? It's
		
01:16:10 --> 01:16:12
			alright. It's it's it just comes under no
		
01:16:12 --> 01:16:12
			permissibility.
		
01:16:13 --> 01:16:14
			When it comes to to come under the
		
01:16:14 --> 01:16:17
			Haram or Macron is when, for example, you're
		
01:16:17 --> 01:16:18
			you're watching it and you're all looking at,
		
01:16:18 --> 01:16:19
			you know, stuff a lot, but, like, you
		
01:16:19 --> 01:16:21
			know, I'm sorry. But women now are, like
		
01:16:21 --> 01:16:23
			like, in the past, it was just men
		
01:16:23 --> 01:16:25
			checking out the woman. Now it's women do
		
01:16:25 --> 01:16:26
			that. Like, oh, look at that guy. Oh
		
01:16:26 --> 01:16:28
			my god. Look at his body. Like,
		
01:16:28 --> 01:16:30
			all that kind of talk. Like, you know
		
01:16:30 --> 01:16:32
			that you've gone too far. When you get
		
01:16:32 --> 01:16:33
			into that kind of thing, you know you've
		
01:16:33 --> 01:16:35
			gone too far. You know? I'm just saying
		
01:16:35 --> 01:16:37
			this openly because that's I need to be
		
01:16:37 --> 01:16:38
			real because
		
01:16:39 --> 01:16:41
			come on. Everyone go if you did got
		
01:16:41 --> 01:16:43
			brought up in Australia, you've you've dealt you've
		
01:16:43 --> 01:16:46
			you've mixed with non Muslim girls, and
		
01:16:46 --> 01:16:49
			we get influenced from the environment around us.
		
01:16:49 --> 01:16:51
			You know? Yeah. And it's not just non
		
01:16:51 --> 01:16:53
			Muslim girls. Let me say sometimes I'm I'm
		
01:16:53 --> 01:16:54
			gonna be really sad to say this, but
		
01:16:54 --> 01:16:55
			sometimes the Muslim girls are worse than non
		
01:16:55 --> 01:16:57
			Muslim girls. Let's be honest. Like, I know
		
01:16:57 --> 01:16:58
			if you talk to some of your daughters
		
01:16:59 --> 01:17:01
			and and you tell your daughters, oh, what
		
01:17:01 --> 01:17:02
			are you hearing about that Muslim Muslim girl?
		
01:17:02 --> 01:17:04
			I'll say to you, mom, you don't know
		
01:17:04 --> 01:17:06
			what she really does? I and sometimes I'll
		
01:17:06 --> 01:17:08
			tell you that, you know, that girl's worse
		
01:17:08 --> 01:17:09
			than the non Muslim girl that I hang
		
01:17:09 --> 01:17:11
			around with at school. The non Muslim girl's
		
01:17:11 --> 01:17:13
			got more manners than, you know, so so
		
01:17:13 --> 01:17:15
			that's the reality, you know, sadly.
		
01:17:17 --> 01:17:18
			Yes. Yes.
		
01:17:19 --> 01:17:21
			Thank you so much for your participation. Oh.
		
01:17:21 --> 01:17:24
			Yeah. So it was related to that question.
		
01:17:24 --> 01:17:24
			Mm-mm.
		
01:17:27 --> 01:17:28
			Oh, yeah.
		
01:17:34 --> 01:17:35
			Like, when you mean to say celebrity, are
		
01:17:35 --> 01:17:37
			you talking about not like a a man
		
01:17:37 --> 01:17:38
			or a woman?
		
01:17:39 --> 01:17:39
			Yeah.
		
01:17:40 --> 01:17:41
			Woman having a car, like a
		
01:17:41 --> 01:17:43
			Yeah. Yeah. Look.
		
01:17:43 --> 01:17:44
			Look.
		
01:17:45 --> 01:17:47
			It's it's really important, sisters.
		
01:17:47 --> 01:17:50
			It's it's really important that we
		
01:17:50 --> 01:17:52
			we we try to understand
		
01:17:53 --> 01:17:55
			that there are some things that it's like
		
01:17:55 --> 01:17:57
			a natural development. I'm not saying we should
		
01:17:57 --> 01:17:59
			encourage this. I'm just trying to say that
		
01:17:59 --> 01:18:01
			we don't wanna overreact on certain things.
		
01:18:02 --> 01:18:04
			Okay? So it's as mothers,
		
01:18:05 --> 01:18:07
			it's important that we don't overreact
		
01:18:07 --> 01:18:09
			with everything. Okay? So, like, just say your
		
01:18:09 --> 01:18:11
			daughter goes, oh, I really love that guy
		
01:18:11 --> 01:18:12
			or whatever.
		
01:18:13 --> 01:18:14
			Like, you know,
		
01:18:15 --> 01:18:16
			this is a time for you to say,
		
01:18:17 --> 01:18:20
			you know, look. You know, that that's a
		
01:18:20 --> 01:18:22
			healthy part of growing up that, you know,
		
01:18:22 --> 01:18:23
			as you get older,
		
01:18:24 --> 01:18:25
			you know, you find that as a woman,
		
01:18:25 --> 01:18:28
			you start to have feelings towards men. You
		
01:18:28 --> 01:18:28
			know? And
		
01:18:29 --> 01:18:31
			and yeah. That's right. And, men start to
		
01:18:31 --> 01:18:33
			have feelings towards women too. That's a that's
		
01:18:33 --> 01:18:35
			a normal part of growing up, you know.
		
01:18:36 --> 01:18:37
			But at the same time,
		
01:18:38 --> 01:18:39
			you know and then you can bring these
		
01:18:39 --> 01:18:41
			I I just spoke about today, you know.
		
01:18:41 --> 01:18:42
			But at the same time, if we feel
		
01:18:42 --> 01:18:44
			attracted to someone, we actually are supposed to
		
01:18:44 --> 01:18:45
			lower our gaze. We're not supposed to keep
		
01:18:45 --> 01:18:47
			looking at them. You know what I mean?
		
01:18:47 --> 01:18:49
			Because it's it's actually because you know what?
		
01:18:50 --> 01:18:51
			You know why we're supposed to lower the
		
01:18:51 --> 01:18:51
			gaze?
		
01:18:52 --> 01:18:54
			Because the messenger of Allah taught us that
		
01:18:54 --> 01:18:55
			once you if you don't lower the gaze,
		
01:18:55 --> 01:18:56
			the shaitan
		
01:18:57 --> 01:18:59
			puts, like, infatuation in your heart.
		
01:19:00 --> 01:19:02
			So you get infatuation in your heart. You
		
01:19:02 --> 01:19:04
			said to become very attached you don't you
		
01:19:04 --> 01:19:06
			don't even become logical. Like, I sometimes get
		
01:19:06 --> 01:19:09
			women. I get girls often. They contact me,
		
01:19:09 --> 01:19:11
			and they say, I'm just in love with
		
01:19:11 --> 01:19:13
			this boy. I'm in love with this guy,
		
01:19:14 --> 01:19:16
			and, he hasn't like, I want him to
		
01:19:16 --> 01:19:18
			ask me to marry, you know, marry him
		
01:19:18 --> 01:19:19
			or or something. You know? But she's just
		
01:19:19 --> 01:19:21
			totally in love with this guy and,
		
01:19:21 --> 01:19:22
			you know
		
01:19:22 --> 01:19:24
			do you know what I mean? And because
		
01:19:24 --> 01:19:26
			she kept on, like maybe she spoke to
		
01:19:26 --> 01:19:28
			him a a lot or she kept on
		
01:19:28 --> 01:19:30
			looking at him, and she became infatuated. And
		
01:19:30 --> 01:19:32
			she doesn't she's not looking at it like,
		
01:19:32 --> 01:19:34
			is this guy actually does he even have
		
01:19:34 --> 01:19:35
			a good qualities to be a husband?
		
01:19:36 --> 01:19:38
			You know what I'm trying to say? So
		
01:19:38 --> 01:19:40
			all I'm saying to you is that that
		
01:19:40 --> 01:19:42
			that makes you become weak. You actually become
		
01:19:42 --> 01:19:44
			weak by that. You You don't become rational.
		
01:19:44 --> 01:19:45
			You lose your rational,
		
01:19:46 --> 01:19:48
			you know, you you lose what's actually maybe
		
01:19:48 --> 01:19:50
			best for you. Like, that person might not
		
01:19:50 --> 01:19:51
			be best for you at all. It could
		
01:19:51 --> 01:19:53
			be very harmful for you. But because you
		
01:19:53 --> 01:19:54
			let yourself
		
01:19:54 --> 01:19:56
			you be you know, you let the shaitan
		
01:19:57 --> 01:19:58
			but you open the door to shaitan
		
01:19:59 --> 01:20:01
			so you'll be coming back to it by
		
01:20:01 --> 01:20:02
			someone who
		
01:20:02 --> 01:20:04
			they might not be you know, it's partly
		
01:20:04 --> 01:20:05
			it's a good chance they're not even good
		
01:20:05 --> 01:20:06
			for you. You know what I'm trying to
		
01:20:06 --> 01:20:08
			say? So just explain it like that. Just
		
01:20:08 --> 01:20:09
			try to explain it like that, but don't
		
01:20:09 --> 01:20:11
			be don't overreact. Don't overreact
		
01:20:12 --> 01:20:14
			because it is it is a it's just
		
01:20:14 --> 01:20:15
			a normal it's yeah. They're going up and
		
01:20:15 --> 01:20:17
			they're and even when they're little. Like, you
		
01:20:17 --> 01:20:19
			know, for example, you know, you could have
		
01:20:19 --> 01:20:21
			I remember when my kids were at school,
		
01:20:21 --> 01:20:22
			you know,
		
01:20:22 --> 01:20:24
			they would tell me, oh, you know what?
		
01:20:24 --> 01:20:26
			I was in the bus today, and this
		
01:20:26 --> 01:20:27
			boy, he said he loves that girl. You
		
01:20:27 --> 01:20:29
			know? And they're only 6.
		
01:20:32 --> 01:20:34
			But at the same time at the same
		
01:20:34 --> 01:20:36
			time, you know, it's important that you do
		
01:20:36 --> 01:20:38
			teach your kids. You should I used to
		
01:20:38 --> 01:20:40
			teach my kids. Right? For when they're small,
		
01:20:40 --> 01:20:42
			I say boys pay boys, girls pay girls.
		
01:20:42 --> 01:20:44
			I used to teach them that. For when
		
01:20:44 --> 01:20:45
			they're small, like, you know, 6 or 7
		
01:20:45 --> 01:20:47
			or something like that. That's cool. I teach
		
01:20:47 --> 01:20:49
			them boys pay. Good boys, girl pay girls.
		
01:20:49 --> 01:20:50
			You know what I'm trying to say? And
		
01:20:50 --> 01:20:51
			I just get them used to that idea
		
01:20:51 --> 01:20:52
			that, you know,
		
01:20:53 --> 01:20:55
			just it's not complete segregation. Like, they're still
		
01:20:55 --> 01:20:57
			in the classroom with boys and stuff like
		
01:20:57 --> 01:20:58
			that. But just to learn that, you know,
		
01:20:58 --> 01:21:01
			girls play girls, boys play boys just to
		
01:21:01 --> 01:21:02
			get in their mind. You know? This is
		
01:21:02 --> 01:21:04
			how we this is how we are because
		
01:21:04 --> 01:21:06
			you don't want them to grow up to,
		
01:21:06 --> 01:21:07
			like, being 12.
		
01:21:07 --> 01:21:09
			Yeah. And they're going through puberty. The girls
		
01:21:09 --> 01:21:11
			are often going through puberty at 11 or
		
01:21:11 --> 01:21:11
			12,
		
01:21:12 --> 01:21:13
			and they're still having no relationships
		
01:21:14 --> 01:21:15
			and talking normally with the guys. You know?
		
01:21:15 --> 01:21:17
			And they're not used to being away from
		
01:21:17 --> 01:21:19
			them, so it's hard for them to change.
		
01:21:22 --> 01:21:22
			Yeah.
		
01:21:30 --> 01:21:32
			Yeah. I think often it's as well, it's
		
01:21:32 --> 01:21:34
			the it's the society that has made them
		
01:21:34 --> 01:21:35
			lose their.
		
01:21:36 --> 01:21:37
			Yes. Yes. Do you know what I'm trying
		
01:21:37 --> 01:21:39
			to say? Haya. It's not necessary they're affected
		
01:21:39 --> 01:21:41
			by feminism. Like, most young girls probably don't
		
01:21:41 --> 01:21:42
			even know what that means.
		
01:21:43 --> 01:21:43
			Do you know what I'm trying to say?
		
01:21:43 --> 01:21:45
			Most of them don't even probably know what
		
01:21:45 --> 01:21:46
			it means, but it's just it's just because
		
01:21:46 --> 01:21:47
			look at the society.
		
01:21:48 --> 01:21:50
			Even boys, they have no haya. Like, don't
		
01:21:50 --> 01:21:51
			think, sisters,
		
01:21:53 --> 01:21:56
			don't think don't think is just women.
		
01:21:56 --> 01:21:58
			Of man, even Had more
		
01:21:59 --> 01:22:01
			than a version in in seclusion. Like, you
		
01:22:01 --> 01:22:03
			know, is for for I taught my boys,
		
01:22:03 --> 01:22:05
			you know, I taught my boys just as
		
01:22:05 --> 01:22:07
			much as I taught the girls. Like and
		
01:22:07 --> 01:22:09
			that's a big problem I find the Muslim
		
01:22:09 --> 01:22:11
			community as well. I wanna add that they
		
01:22:11 --> 01:22:13
			they sometimes got overboard with the girls in
		
01:22:13 --> 01:22:15
			teaching and they just let the boys go
		
01:22:15 --> 01:22:17
			crate. Like, they just let the boys loose.
		
01:22:17 --> 01:22:18
			And they don't teach them.
		
01:22:19 --> 01:22:21
			Like, we have to teach the boys like
		
01:22:21 --> 01:22:22
			lowering their gaze,
		
01:22:23 --> 01:22:26
			guiding, you know, wearing appropriate clothing, not, like,
		
01:22:26 --> 01:22:26
			just,
		
01:22:27 --> 01:22:29
			not not talking to girls just easily,
		
01:22:29 --> 01:22:30
			you know. Do you understand?
		
01:22:31 --> 01:22:34
			Having having noble noble character. Like, think about
		
01:22:34 --> 01:22:35
			the prophets and messengers.
		
01:22:36 --> 01:22:38
			That's your example. Ask yourself if you wanna
		
01:22:38 --> 01:22:40
			think about how you should be teaching your
		
01:22:40 --> 01:22:42
			kids, how would those how did Yusuf like
		
01:22:43 --> 01:22:44
			Yusuf alaihis salaam.
		
01:22:45 --> 01:22:48
			That I actually, I when my kids especially
		
01:22:48 --> 01:22:49
			my boys when they when they reached teenage
		
01:22:49 --> 01:22:50
			years,
		
01:22:50 --> 01:22:52
			I went through the story of Yusuf alaihis
		
01:22:52 --> 01:22:54
			salaam and, I got them to memorize that
		
01:22:54 --> 01:22:54
			surah,
		
01:22:55 --> 01:22:56
			suit Yusuf.
		
01:22:56 --> 01:22:58
			And how did Yusuf protect his chastity
		
01:22:59 --> 01:23:01
			from that woman who tried to seduce him?
		
01:23:01 --> 01:23:03
			So Islam came
		
01:23:03 --> 01:23:05
			for for to for men to have modesty
		
01:23:05 --> 01:23:08
			and and have and protect themselves too because
		
01:23:08 --> 01:23:11
			I'm just saying this because we always unfortunately,
		
01:23:11 --> 01:23:13
			there's so much overemphasis on the women and
		
01:23:13 --> 01:23:16
			their but they don't teach enough about there's
		
01:23:16 --> 01:23:18
			not enough emphasis on the men.
		
01:23:18 --> 01:23:19
			And, you know,
		
01:23:20 --> 01:23:22
			you know, saying the women are loud will
		
01:23:22 --> 01:23:24
			even the men, there's loud men too. The
		
01:23:24 --> 01:23:25
			way they're behaving is not the the way
		
01:23:25 --> 01:23:27
			of a Muslim man. It's not the way
		
01:23:27 --> 01:23:29
			of a Muslim man. You know? Muslim men
		
01:23:29 --> 01:23:30
			are supposed to
		
01:23:31 --> 01:23:32
			you know, the way they're supposed to behave
		
01:23:32 --> 01:23:33
			is not like a not like a not
		
01:23:33 --> 01:23:34
			like a clown
		
01:23:35 --> 01:23:36
			and not like
		
01:23:37 --> 01:23:39
			a a loud a loud mouth with no
		
01:23:39 --> 01:23:40
			manners, with no.
		
01:23:41 --> 01:23:43
			Okay. Now, unfortunately, you can see a lot
		
01:23:43 --> 01:23:45
			of them that's where how they are. It's
		
01:23:45 --> 01:23:46
			very sad. Like, you know, people who haven't
		
01:23:46 --> 01:23:49
			done tarbiyah like, they haven't done proper tarbiyah
		
01:23:49 --> 01:23:49
			of their children.
		
01:23:50 --> 01:23:51
			You can see it very, it's everywhere.
		
01:23:52 --> 01:23:53
			You know? I remember when my kids were
		
01:23:53 --> 01:23:54
			at school, the way their boys used to
		
01:23:54 --> 01:23:56
			behave, the girls used to behave.
		
01:23:57 --> 01:23:57
			There's no.
		
01:23:58 --> 01:24:01
			There's no. That's the whole problem. Means, like,
		
01:24:01 --> 01:24:03
			bringing up the children properly on their Islamic
		
01:24:03 --> 01:24:03
			etiquettes.
		
01:24:04 --> 01:24:06
			Where are the where are the parents?
		
01:24:07 --> 01:24:08
			Where are the parents? The parents aren't doing
		
01:24:08 --> 01:24:10
			their job. Well, why they're not? They're not
		
01:24:10 --> 01:24:12
			teaching their children the Islamic etiquettes from when
		
01:24:12 --> 01:24:14
			they're young and then they come crying to
		
01:24:14 --> 01:24:15
			you when the kid's 18
		
01:24:16 --> 01:24:18
			or or 20. They come crying to you.
		
01:24:18 --> 01:24:19
			Oh, look at my door. Look at my
		
01:24:19 --> 01:24:21
			son. But you didn't teach them from the
		
01:24:21 --> 01:24:23
			beginning. That's why they've turned out like that.
		
01:24:23 --> 01:24:25
			It's very hard to change. Like, once they
		
01:24:25 --> 01:24:27
			got used to a certain way what did
		
01:24:27 --> 01:24:28
			I say before?
		
01:24:31 --> 01:24:32
			That the prevention
		
01:24:32 --> 01:24:35
			is easier and better than trying to cure
		
01:24:35 --> 01:24:36
			the problem when it's already happened.
		
01:24:37 --> 01:24:37
			You know?
		
01:24:38 --> 01:24:39
			Yes. That,
		
01:24:40 --> 01:24:42
			celebrity interaction all there. Yeah. This is also
		
01:24:42 --> 01:24:43
			important to
		
01:24:52 --> 01:24:54
			mind. Yeah. And at that, we don't know
		
01:24:54 --> 01:24:54
			who's dying in our life, you know? This
		
01:24:54 --> 01:24:55
			is the last thing. And at that, when
		
01:24:55 --> 01:24:56
			they don't get the ideal
		
01:24:56 --> 01:24:58
			guy, because it's male or female,
		
01:24:58 --> 01:25:00
			they can't try to get set and launch
		
01:25:00 --> 01:25:02
			if you actually particular life. This is an
		
01:25:02 --> 01:25:05
			also this is another big problem. Sorry. Can
		
01:25:05 --> 01:25:05
			you say that to me again? I don't
		
01:25:05 --> 01:25:05
			understand it. And you know, regarding that celebrity
		
01:25:05 --> 01:25:05
			question Yeah. You know what's happening?
		
01:25:06 --> 01:25:06
			Yeah.
		
01:25:23 --> 01:25:24
			Yeah. Yeah. Maybe. But I just wanna say
		
01:25:24 --> 01:25:27
			something. Like, sisters, when it comes to the
		
01:25:27 --> 01:25:30
			celebrities Yeah. Okay. Can I say that those
		
01:25:30 --> 01:25:32
			celebrities just we gotta we gotta understand something?
		
01:25:32 --> 01:25:35
			See, when you're young, you're a little bit
		
01:25:35 --> 01:25:37
			naive. You don't understand what's on the other
		
01:25:37 --> 01:25:39
			side. If you had been brought up as
		
01:25:39 --> 01:25:40
			a non Muslim like me
		
01:25:41 --> 01:25:42
			and you know what those celebrities do, and
		
01:25:42 --> 01:25:44
			when you get older, you'll understand.
		
01:25:44 --> 01:25:47
			They are so they are so corrupt. Like,
		
01:25:47 --> 01:25:48
			they live in such a I'm sorry. They
		
01:25:48 --> 01:25:50
			live the most filthy life. When you know
		
01:25:50 --> 01:25:52
			how filthy their lives are, the drugs, the
		
01:25:52 --> 01:25:53
			stuff for the the
		
01:25:54 --> 01:25:56
			the god knows what else, like, everything. You
		
01:25:56 --> 01:25:58
			understand? Everything you can think of,
		
01:25:58 --> 01:26:00
			you'll be so turned off. They're not even
		
01:26:00 --> 01:26:02
			someone to follow. You understand? They're not someone
		
01:26:02 --> 01:26:05
			to follow. Like, you can't even even look
		
01:26:05 --> 01:26:06
			at them. They're not even
		
01:26:06 --> 01:26:09
			who are who are they? Nothing. They're nothing.
		
01:26:10 --> 01:26:11
			Their their their their worth in the sight
		
01:26:11 --> 01:26:13
			of Allah is nothing, less than nothing.
		
01:26:14 --> 01:26:14
			Right?
		
01:26:15 --> 01:26:15
			So,
		
01:26:16 --> 01:26:18
			like, you look for the people of virtue.
		
01:26:18 --> 01:26:20
			That's the ones you need to look for.
		
01:26:20 --> 01:26:22
			Like, people of virtue the people like, look
		
01:26:22 --> 01:26:24
			at the prophets and messengers are our greatest
		
01:26:24 --> 01:26:26
			role models and examples. How pure? Go back
		
01:26:26 --> 01:26:28
			to the Quran. Look at the way that
		
01:26:28 --> 01:26:30
			the the virtues and the character of the
		
01:26:30 --> 01:26:31
			prophets and messengers.
		
01:26:31 --> 01:26:34
			Like our messenger, salallahu alaihi wasalam, how is
		
01:26:34 --> 01:26:36
			his how is his beautiful character, the the
		
01:26:36 --> 01:26:37
			respect,
		
01:26:37 --> 01:26:40
			you know, the the chastity, the purity, all
		
01:26:40 --> 01:26:41
			of those things. You know, Islam, that's what
		
01:26:41 --> 01:26:43
			Islam came with. And those people, they they
		
01:26:43 --> 01:26:44
			are completely devoid of that.
		
01:26:45 --> 01:26:46
			So
		
01:26:49 --> 01:26:51
			anybody else got any? Yes. Yeah.
		
01:26:52 --> 01:26:56
			The question was, like, in our dramas, you
		
01:26:56 --> 01:26:56
			know,
		
01:26:56 --> 01:26:59
			this this is all romance. Oh, which which
		
01:26:59 --> 01:27:01
			drama are you talking about? Like, Bollywood and
		
01:27:01 --> 01:27:01
			stuff?
		
01:27:02 --> 01:27:04
			It might be romantic and Yeah. Yeah. Unloved
		
01:27:04 --> 01:27:06
			relations, like Oh, yeah. Get in love with
		
01:27:06 --> 01:27:09
			that. Yeah. Yeah. The scenes are like that.
		
01:27:09 --> 01:27:11
			Yeah. Yeah. Like, it's not, like, always the
		
01:27:11 --> 01:27:14
			bedroom scenes. So Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
		
01:27:14 --> 01:27:15
			Yeah. Yeah. Like,
		
01:27:15 --> 01:27:17
			kisses Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. In English movies? Yeah.
		
01:27:17 --> 01:27:20
			Yeah. But what we can do about that?
		
01:27:20 --> 01:27:22
			I was like, I keep I keep praying.
		
01:27:23 --> 01:27:24
			Like, we all,
		
01:27:25 --> 01:27:27
			remove the love of those girls from those
		
01:27:28 --> 01:27:29
			Yeah. Like,
		
01:27:30 --> 01:27:32
			will I make too unsure? Kisses, we have,
		
01:27:33 --> 01:27:36
			like, we need some entertainment. Yeah. Yeah. There's
		
01:27:36 --> 01:27:38
			nothing wrong. We will Yeah. Yeah. This and
		
01:27:38 --> 01:27:40
			that. Yeah. Yeah. So, like, like Yani, look.
		
01:27:40 --> 01:27:40
			It
		
01:27:42 --> 01:27:42
			like,
		
01:27:43 --> 01:27:44
			sometimes
		
01:27:44 --> 01:27:47
			sometimes we when we compare what's worse,
		
01:27:47 --> 01:27:49
			we think it's better looking at that than
		
01:27:49 --> 01:27:51
			that. You know what I'm trying to say?
		
01:27:51 --> 01:27:53
			At least it's let let me say this.
		
01:27:53 --> 01:27:54
			It's so sad to say this, but at
		
01:27:54 --> 01:27:55
			least it's
		
01:27:55 --> 01:27:56
			a natural
		
01:27:57 --> 01:27:59
			natural attraction, not something that's
		
01:28:00 --> 01:28:01
			unnatural attraction.
		
01:28:02 --> 01:28:02
			So,
		
01:28:03 --> 01:28:04
			you know, and at least it's
		
01:28:05 --> 01:28:07
			hope hopefully those shows you're watching, they they
		
01:28:07 --> 01:28:09
			actually end up getting married. You know, it's
		
01:28:09 --> 01:28:10
			not just like stuff a lot going into.
		
01:28:10 --> 01:28:12
			You know, they they actually gonna get married
		
01:28:12 --> 01:28:13
			in the end.
		
01:28:13 --> 01:28:14
			So,
		
01:28:15 --> 01:28:15
			you know,
		
01:28:16 --> 01:28:17
			I mean, it's normal for kids to think,
		
01:28:17 --> 01:28:19
			oh, you know, when I go up, I'm
		
01:28:19 --> 01:28:21
			gonna, you know, I'm gonna get married and
		
01:28:21 --> 01:28:23
			she's got at least a healthy mindset that
		
01:28:23 --> 01:28:24
			she's, you know, she's
		
01:28:25 --> 01:28:26
			do you know what I'm trying to say?
		
01:28:26 --> 01:28:27
			Like
		
01:28:28 --> 01:28:30
			That's true. Like As long as long as
		
01:28:30 --> 01:28:32
			watching, a movie image,
		
01:28:33 --> 01:28:34
			like gay or lesbian That's what I'm trying
		
01:28:34 --> 01:28:35
			to say.
		
01:28:37 --> 01:28:38
			Instead of that, this That's what I'm trying
		
01:28:38 --> 01:28:40
			to say. I'm not saying I'm I'm if
		
01:28:40 --> 01:28:42
			like, if we can avoid those things, if
		
01:28:42 --> 01:28:42
			we, Yani,
		
01:28:44 --> 01:28:46
			we have to kind of think what's the
		
01:28:46 --> 01:28:47
			worst and the better. You know what I'm
		
01:28:47 --> 01:28:48
			trying to say? And I don't know which
		
01:28:48 --> 01:28:50
			one's exactly you're talking about, but all I'm
		
01:28:50 --> 01:28:51
			saying to you is if there's,
		
01:28:52 --> 01:28:52
			like,
		
01:28:53 --> 01:28:55
			obviously, if there's passionate kissing and that they
		
01:28:55 --> 01:28:56
			shouldn't be watching those kind of things. They
		
01:28:56 --> 01:28:58
			should be turning away. They should be that
		
01:28:58 --> 01:28:59
			should be,
		
01:29:01 --> 01:29:02
			censored.
		
01:29:02 --> 01:29:03
			You censor it.
		
01:29:04 --> 01:29:05
			Yeah.
		
01:29:06 --> 01:29:08
			Okay. So someone's asking, can you wear red
		
01:29:08 --> 01:29:09
			lipstick?
		
01:29:10 --> 01:29:12
			Okay. So, yes, you can wear red lipstick
		
01:29:12 --> 01:29:14
			if you're at home with your parents,
		
01:29:14 --> 01:29:17
			with your you're in a wedding with sisters.
		
01:29:17 --> 01:29:19
			There's no one Mahrms are gonna see you.
		
01:29:20 --> 01:29:21
			But obviously, if you wear it outside
		
01:29:22 --> 01:29:24
			I mean, what was red lipstick invented for?
		
01:29:25 --> 01:29:28
			It was invented to accentuate the woman's lips,
		
01:29:29 --> 01:29:30
			to make her more sexually attracted.
		
01:29:31 --> 01:29:33
			You know one of the reasons I actually
		
01:29:33 --> 01:29:34
			loved Islam?
		
01:29:34 --> 01:29:36
			When I read about the hijab, and I
		
01:29:36 --> 01:29:38
			actually loved Islam for it. I just thought
		
01:29:38 --> 01:29:39
			that's amazing because I didn't realize I was
		
01:29:39 --> 01:29:40
			in a trap. Because I was one of
		
01:29:40 --> 01:29:42
			those women who used to go spend one
		
01:29:42 --> 01:29:43
			half hours
		
01:29:43 --> 01:29:45
			doing my hair in the in the mirror,
		
01:29:45 --> 01:29:47
			putting on all the makeup. And then one
		
01:29:47 --> 01:29:49
			day I realized when I read these books
		
01:29:49 --> 01:29:51
			about Islam, wow. I've actually been a slave
		
01:29:51 --> 01:29:53
			to men and I didn't even realize.
		
01:29:53 --> 01:29:55
			Giving them what they want, like, getting to
		
01:29:55 --> 01:29:57
			see whatever they want from me. You understand?
		
01:29:57 --> 01:29:58
			And I thought, no. I'm not gonna do
		
01:29:58 --> 01:29:59
			that. I'm gonna wear hijab. You know? You
		
01:29:59 --> 01:30:00
			understand? So
		
01:30:01 --> 01:30:02
			so that red lipstick,
		
01:30:03 --> 01:30:05
			you might have the good intention again, but
		
01:30:05 --> 01:30:07
			that's actually attracting to you. Like, it's accentuating
		
01:30:07 --> 01:30:09
			your lips and making the eyes look at
		
01:30:09 --> 01:30:11
			you, you know, through the red lipstick. So
		
01:30:11 --> 01:30:13
			and I and I just wanna say that
		
01:30:13 --> 01:30:15
			if women, like, if some if women are
		
01:30:15 --> 01:30:17
			wearing non obvious makeup, I don't I don't
		
01:30:17 --> 01:30:18
			think that's a problem. Like, if it's like
		
01:30:18 --> 01:30:20
			a bit of because people ask me can
		
01:30:20 --> 01:30:21
			I wear a bit of a little bit?
		
01:30:21 --> 01:30:23
			Like, you know, they've got dark circles. They
		
01:30:23 --> 01:30:25
			feel very self conscious and but with but
		
01:30:25 --> 01:30:27
			what should be what should be avoided? But
		
01:30:27 --> 01:30:29
			not when I say foundation, I mean,
		
01:30:29 --> 01:30:31
			like, don't make it obvious. You know? Just
		
01:30:31 --> 01:30:33
			make it subtle that it's not obvious. Do
		
01:30:33 --> 01:30:35
			you understand? To make yourself feel like a
		
01:30:35 --> 01:30:37
			human being, you could say, as a woman,
		
01:30:37 --> 01:30:39
			but not obvious where it can be seen.
		
01:30:39 --> 01:30:40
			You know what I mean? Not packed on
		
01:30:40 --> 01:30:44
			or, you know, obvious makeup. Okay? Avoid that.
		
01:30:51 --> 01:30:53
			Yeah. Well, obviously, if it's obvious, you you
		
01:30:53 --> 01:30:55
			have to be careful. You understand? Because now
		
01:30:55 --> 01:30:55
			it's starting
		
01:30:56 --> 01:30:58
			to attract to you. You understand? So you
		
01:30:58 --> 01:30:59
			you need to make sure it's just subtle,
		
01:30:59 --> 01:31:00
			like I said.
		
01:31:01 --> 01:31:03
			Can you see a woman whose hair is
		
01:31:03 --> 01:31:05
			a little bit of skin showing?
		
01:31:06 --> 01:31:08
			Can you see a woman whose hair is
		
01:31:08 --> 01:31:09
			a little bit of skin showing? I'm a
		
01:31:09 --> 01:31:11
			bit like Maybe. She seems like it's showing
		
01:31:11 --> 01:31:13
			a little bit of hair.
		
01:31:14 --> 01:31:16
			I'm not sure. Anyway, but women as I
		
01:31:16 --> 01:31:17
			said, you know, women are supposed to cover
		
01:31:17 --> 01:31:19
			their hair completely. K? So I don't know
		
01:31:19 --> 01:31:20
			exactly what that means.
		
01:31:24 --> 01:31:26
			Who is your That's a long story. I
		
01:31:26 --> 01:31:28
			did a whole research aside on that.
		
01:31:29 --> 01:31:32
			Let's say your in in short, your is
		
01:31:32 --> 01:31:33
			your close male relatives
		
01:31:39 --> 01:31:40
			you know, your uncle.
		
01:31:41 --> 01:31:43
			Okay? The close male relatives.
		
01:31:43 --> 01:31:45
			He's not he's not your
		
01:31:46 --> 01:31:48
			he's not your brother-in-law. Your brother-in-law is not
		
01:31:48 --> 01:31:48
			your
		
01:31:49 --> 01:31:49
			maharam.
		
01:31:50 --> 01:31:50
			Your
		
01:31:51 --> 01:31:54
			The the person you can't marry. Yeah. The
		
01:31:54 --> 01:31:56
			person you cannot marry. That's what maharam means.
		
01:31:56 --> 01:31:58
			Like, your your daughter's husband
		
01:31:59 --> 01:32:00
			is your maheram.
		
01:32:02 --> 01:32:05
			Your your your father's, sorry. Your mom's your
		
01:32:05 --> 01:32:08
			mom's husband your mom's husband is your maheram.
		
01:32:08 --> 01:32:10
			Your father-in-law and husband?
		
01:32:11 --> 01:32:11
			Your
		
01:32:12 --> 01:32:14
			father-in-law. Your father-in-law is your maheram. Yes.
		
01:32:16 --> 01:32:18
			Okay. So the close male who achieves that
		
01:32:18 --> 01:32:20
			you cannot marry, they are your.
		
01:32:24 --> 01:32:26
			What is your what if your parents can't
		
01:32:26 --> 01:32:27
			afford a segregated
		
01:32:28 --> 01:32:29
			school? Yeah. This is gonna be a very
		
01:32:29 --> 01:32:31
			big problem for us, ma'am, and make it
		
01:32:31 --> 01:32:32
			easy for us.
		
01:32:33 --> 01:32:34
			Okay.
		
01:32:34 --> 01:32:37
			So it's very sad that the government is
		
01:32:37 --> 01:32:39
			actually getting rid of the the the
		
01:32:41 --> 01:32:43
			the non segregated schools, the public schools. Because
		
01:32:43 --> 01:32:45
			up until now, we've had public schools like
		
01:32:45 --> 01:32:46
			Wylie Park Girls,
		
01:32:47 --> 01:32:51
			Bellmore Boys, Punchbowl Boys. They are unfortunately, it's
		
01:32:51 --> 01:32:53
			very sad, but they're actually moving to get
		
01:32:53 --> 01:32:54
			rid of all those,
		
01:32:55 --> 01:32:58
			single * schools and make them mixed. That's
		
01:32:58 --> 01:32:59
			actually very sad because that was actually a
		
01:32:59 --> 01:33:02
			good solution for so many Muslim families.
		
01:33:02 --> 01:33:04
			Like, they would put their kids in those
		
01:33:04 --> 01:33:06
			schools and it was very good. Like, at
		
01:33:06 --> 01:33:08
			least they were with all boys or all
		
01:33:08 --> 01:33:09
			all girls.
		
01:33:09 --> 01:33:10
			That That is gonna be a problem, mate.
		
01:33:10 --> 01:33:11
			I wanna make it easy.
		
01:33:12 --> 01:33:12
			Now
		
01:33:13 --> 01:33:14
			every
		
01:33:14 --> 01:33:16
			every child is different.
		
01:33:17 --> 01:33:19
			Every child is different. Some kids,
		
01:33:20 --> 01:33:22
			they know they're deigned. They're strong,
		
01:33:23 --> 01:33:25
			and they know how to stay away and
		
01:33:25 --> 01:33:27
			and stay with, you know, the boys, for
		
01:33:27 --> 01:33:27
			example.
		
01:33:28 --> 01:33:29
			If they, you know, their boys or they
		
01:33:29 --> 01:33:31
			they know their girls to stay with the
		
01:33:31 --> 01:33:31
			girls,
		
01:33:32 --> 01:33:33
			they might be able to cope.
		
01:33:34 --> 01:33:36
			You just have to see. But if you
		
01:33:36 --> 01:33:38
			know your child's weak, then you're gonna have
		
01:33:38 --> 01:33:39
			to try and, you know, may Allah make
		
01:33:39 --> 01:33:42
			it easy for you? Look for some type
		
01:33:42 --> 01:33:43
			of alternative. It might you might have to
		
01:33:43 --> 01:33:45
			think about maybe homeschooling
		
01:33:45 --> 01:33:47
			or, you know, you try to think of,
		
01:33:47 --> 01:33:51
			you you know, look for a a less
		
01:33:51 --> 01:33:55
			expensive Islamic school. Chop shop shop around and
		
01:33:55 --> 01:33:58
			make it easy for everyone because it is
		
01:33:58 --> 01:34:00
			it is a problem.
		
01:34:01 --> 01:34:03
			Yes. If you go to a mixed school,
		
01:34:03 --> 01:34:04
			doesn't it depend on how you act around
		
01:34:04 --> 01:34:05
			exactly. It does.
		
01:34:06 --> 01:34:07
			So that's what exactly what I'm trying to
		
01:34:07 --> 01:34:10
			say. Everybody is different. There are some kids
		
01:34:10 --> 01:34:12
			that come out of these public schools, and
		
01:34:12 --> 01:34:14
			on Labarik, they're so strong in their iman.
		
01:34:14 --> 01:34:16
			So just because they went to a public
		
01:34:16 --> 01:34:18
			school doesn't mean they could be better than
		
01:34:18 --> 01:34:20
			the not the ones in the Islamic school.
		
01:34:20 --> 01:34:21
			Trust me. I know. My kids all went
		
01:34:21 --> 01:34:22
			to Islamic schools
		
01:34:22 --> 01:34:24
			and, yes, there were some good kids in
		
01:34:24 --> 01:34:25
			those schools, but let me tell you as
		
01:34:25 --> 01:34:27
			well. There was some very, very, like
		
01:34:28 --> 01:34:30
			I mean, some people put their kids in
		
01:34:30 --> 01:34:31
			those schools to try to fix them up.
		
01:34:31 --> 01:34:34
			That doesn't work. Right? It doesn't work. So
		
01:34:35 --> 01:34:37
			the schools aren't there to fix your kids.
		
01:34:37 --> 01:34:38
			You know? It's like,
		
01:34:38 --> 01:34:40
			so, yeah, I'm I'm not trying to say
		
01:34:40 --> 01:34:43
			this that you can't. It's just gonna be
		
01:34:43 --> 01:34:44
			you've gotta be aware. You have to be
		
01:34:44 --> 01:34:45
			aware. If we if we teach our kids
		
01:34:45 --> 01:34:46
			these guidelines,
		
01:34:47 --> 01:34:49
			we and you're close to your kids. Like,
		
01:34:49 --> 01:34:50
			if your kids have a good relationship, a
		
01:34:50 --> 01:34:53
			healthy relationship with you and you're close with
		
01:34:53 --> 01:34:55
			them, it's it's gonna be possible
		
01:34:55 --> 01:34:57
			for them to go through without a problem.
		
01:34:58 --> 01:35:00
			But, you know, it's just something to keep
		
01:35:00 --> 01:35:00
			in mind.
		
01:35:01 --> 01:35:02
			Alright. So
		
01:35:05 --> 01:35:07
			is it okay to tell others your crush?
		
01:35:07 --> 01:35:09
			If I was gonna tell someone my crap,
		
01:35:09 --> 01:35:10
			like, if you had a crush,
		
01:35:11 --> 01:35:12
			hopefully no. I know that's not always the
		
01:35:12 --> 01:35:13
			case, unfortunately.
		
01:35:14 --> 01:35:16
			It's better just to, like hopefully, you've got
		
01:35:16 --> 01:35:18
			a healthy relationship with your mom. Sometimes some
		
01:35:18 --> 01:35:20
			not every not every girl has a healthy
		
01:35:20 --> 01:35:21
			relationship with their mom. Like, they don't feel
		
01:35:21 --> 01:35:23
			safe to to share with her because,
		
01:35:24 --> 01:35:25
			unfortunately, a lot of mothers,
		
01:35:26 --> 01:35:27
			they don't understand
		
01:35:27 --> 01:35:29
			kind of how to interact with their children.
		
01:35:29 --> 01:35:30
			They need some a bit more help. Right?
		
01:35:31 --> 01:35:32
			So they overreact a lot with their kids,
		
01:35:32 --> 01:35:34
			and that makes the kids not wanna share.
		
01:35:34 --> 01:35:36
			Alright? So understand. But if you do have
		
01:35:36 --> 01:35:37
			that good relationship,
		
01:35:37 --> 01:35:38
			you know, you could just share, mom, you
		
01:35:38 --> 01:35:39
			know what?
		
01:35:40 --> 01:35:41
			I've been like, I can't help but I've
		
01:35:41 --> 01:35:43
			been feeling a bit of a crush on
		
01:35:43 --> 01:35:44
			this boy. And and and hopefully, if she
		
01:35:44 --> 01:35:46
			as I said, if you got a healthy
		
01:35:46 --> 01:35:48
			relationship, she's gonna react exactly how I told
		
01:35:48 --> 01:35:49
			told you before.
		
01:35:49 --> 01:35:51
			She's gonna give you the she's gonna give
		
01:35:51 --> 01:35:53
			you a talk that, look, my daughter,
		
01:35:53 --> 01:35:55
			that's just a sign of you growing up
		
01:35:55 --> 01:35:56
			and and maturing,
		
01:35:56 --> 01:35:58
			and it just goes to show that you're
		
01:35:58 --> 01:36:00
			a healthy female and, you know, and
		
01:36:02 --> 01:36:03
			yeah.
		
01:36:05 --> 01:36:05
			So
		
01:36:06 --> 01:36:08
			okay. And she's gonna deal with it in
		
01:36:08 --> 01:36:09
			a good way, inshallah. Okay?
		
01:36:11 --> 01:36:13
			I go to uni and I sometimes
		
01:36:13 --> 01:36:15
			be late. The uni is very dim and
		
01:36:15 --> 01:36:17
			it is mostly other girls. I leave early
		
01:36:17 --> 01:36:19
			for my safety. I ask if I could
		
01:36:19 --> 01:36:21
			walk with a male classmate to the station.
		
01:36:24 --> 01:36:24
			Look.
		
01:36:25 --> 01:36:27
			It's better if you don't do that. Try
		
01:36:27 --> 01:36:28
			to try to,
		
01:36:28 --> 01:36:30
			try as much as you can to walk
		
01:36:30 --> 01:36:31
			with always females.
		
01:36:32 --> 01:36:34
			But let's just say there was just no
		
01:36:34 --> 01:36:36
			there was no one and you felt very
		
01:36:36 --> 01:36:37
			unsafe. You might like, you felt scared you
		
01:36:37 --> 01:36:38
			could get
		
01:36:38 --> 01:36:40
			attacked. I mean, we have the story of,
		
01:36:40 --> 01:36:41
			Salama,
		
01:36:42 --> 01:36:43
			who was making hijra.
		
01:36:43 --> 01:36:45
			She was making hijra from
		
01:36:45 --> 01:36:46
			Makkatu and Medina.
		
01:36:47 --> 01:36:49
			And yeah. I'm gonna I'm I know.
		
01:36:49 --> 01:36:52
			And the the Sahabi came and helped her
		
01:36:52 --> 01:36:53
			to do hijra.
		
01:36:53 --> 01:36:56
			So it's possible for a male, but then
		
01:36:56 --> 01:36:57
			there has to be
		
01:36:58 --> 01:37:00
			not all the time, once it happens, you
		
01:37:00 --> 01:37:02
			know, to to protect her.
		
01:37:02 --> 01:37:03
			Okay?
		
01:37:03 --> 01:37:05
			So, anyway, I hope that that answered both
		
01:37:05 --> 01:37:07
			of your questions. I think most of you
		
01:37:07 --> 01:37:08
			should have the an idea of what, like,
		
01:37:08 --> 01:37:09
			how it all works.
		
01:37:10 --> 01:37:13
			And, if anyone's interested in my classes,
		
01:37:14 --> 01:37:15
			if you're on social media, you can follow
		
01:37:15 --> 01:37:16
			me on,
		
01:37:17 --> 01:37:18
			at jumanadine
		
01:37:18 --> 01:37:20
			or on Facebook at jumanadine.
		
01:37:22 --> 01:37:23
			You can ask the sisters to my my
		
01:37:23 --> 01:37:25
			phone number, but I don't take calls. Only
		
01:37:25 --> 01:37:27
			you can just message me on WhatsApp. Alright?
		
01:37:27 --> 01:37:29
			Message me on WhatsApp, and I've got I'm
		
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			studying my new,
		
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			sharia class on the 27th July. We're studying
		
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			about salah.
		
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			Only for 17 years and over. I only
		
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			teach adults. I don't teach kids. Sorry.