Umm Jamaal ud-Din – Coping With Life Struggles and Lockdowns
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The speakers emphasize the importance of self-reflection and mind control during the pandemic, as well as the need for praying together and staying true to one's mental health. They also emphasize the importance of finding a way to slow down and focus on different things, as well as the need for a positive environment for employees to work and collaborate. The speakers emphasize the importance of being a successful entrepreneur and working towards building a successful organization, as well as the need for a positive mindset and flexibility.
AI: Summary ©
For us to speak about was
how can a Muslim cope? You know, we've live struggles. And I think, obviously, the biggest struggle for everyone right now is,
you know, the lockdown
and coping with all the different
tests that result from that. Right. Um, I think it's probably important to start off, just to acknowledge the struggles that may people are facing right now. Like,
you know, I've got
teenagers, I've got young adult, children, calling children more, but, you know, young adult kids, and it is, let's just acknowledge for a minute, it is very difficult for for young people right now, like, this is, you know, you're in, obviously, you're in the product or, you know, youth and this is your time for socialization, like socialization is so important for this age, you know, what I mean, retain, when your early 20s, like, you depend on socialization so much.
And then just feeling so bored and just so locked in all the time. You know, it's, it's very difficult, you know, I see my kids struggling with it. But I think
one thing to also realize, too, is,
for a lot of, you know, young, you know, when you're just starting out in life, you haven't really gone through a lot of really major trials, like most people haven't gone through a lot of major trials before, you know what I mean. Right, yeah. So I do think that that makes it harder for people to cope with, because just haven't gone through something before. You know what I mean?
Yeah, I'll be honest with you, if you have a little chat to like your mom, or you know, your grandma.
Often you find them a lot what I learned coping a little bit better only because they've gone through other stuff. That's true. And so that then becomes a resource for them. So I know, it's hard to look at it like that now, but later on, you will like, is always hiring everything that happens to us, even though it's difficult for us to see it now. But you'll be surprised how some kind of love this will really make you much more resilient for life. You know?
Just try keep that in mind. You know, I think that's one thing, but like, yeah, just to acknowledge everyone's struggle right now. Like I see it from a youth perspective. But I mean, look, everyone's going through different trials, like you've got, you know, brothers out of work. You got mothers struggling with trying to have all these little kids at home and the school kids at home, they're trying to cope with all the extra
you know, homework and stuff, specially Islamic schools. Yeah. And then you've got, you know, then you've got single mothers, they're very isolated, in what cases
elderly can't see anyone. It's a lot of people being tested from all different angles, and then you only have to talk to the families who have been tested with actual COVID like it is very stressful, man, lots of counselor, give them all Schieffer, you know, it's not just the actual sickness, like they get, like the ones I've spoken to, they get extremely sick.
And these are not even old people. These are like, in their 30s like, they're getting very sick. Like they can't get out of bed for like, days. The hands are shaking, like they're so weak, but that's not the only thing it's about like that, you know, you've probably heard they've had the army coming around at the police. Like, look, you know, this is all these extra stresses, you know, you can't see your kids. You can't watch to get taken away somewhere because there's a lot of different stresses going on. Yeah, so look, the thing what I can see
because it was like this just acknowledge there's a lot of harshness right now. Like we all feel this sort of harshness on us. You know, like there's the harshness of the lockdown laws. I mean, we just got told that any lady go over our house for one hour a day to exercise you know
we've got it we've got a curfew I know you guys great got your curfew like I know where we're the spoilt ones up here because you know you guys got the you got a curfew haven't yet you've all got the curfew.
Yeah, I think anyone would just make you feel like no matter how small or big the restriction is, it just takes away that little bit of freedom in your life. Yeah, definitely does cause all these you know, stresses But Peter, you know, cuz we're in the we're in the eighth LGA is you know, so we've got the curfew now game cron is from.
It's gonna be from nine to nine at night until until five o'clock in the morning.
Anyway, look at all that. We're going to realize right, with all that harshness that's going on around you and then not just the harshness of the laws and then the harshness of others. Like I don't care about you. You all deserve it and
the harshness of like maybe not finding work, financial stress, you know all that. So that's why it is so important. I can't stress this enough. It is so important in life.
All that okay, to, um, you're in some, so much more need for self care at this time, then than any other time, okay, so you have to actually consciously, you know, provide that self care to, you know to yourself, I can't stress that enough, okay? Because you might be so focused on everything else going on, but you might not realize that you how much you need to really look after yourself in such a situation. Okay, to really stay on top, like, to stay in a good place like for you to be in a good place, you know, where you feel positive, and you you're able to cope with everything you've got to look after yourself. So I thought what I do is, first of all, I'll just, you know, share a few
things that I've been doing. Because, yes, the Panama you never know how something I do, you might help give you an idea, you know,
this is also based upon previous experiences, because I have gone through some fairly huge, you know, life tests in before, you know, in the past, and that sort of has taught me what to do, I kind of like. So whenever those tests come up in life, I've learned to kick into what I call survival mode, I call it kick into survival mode, right?
So, um, survival mode, basically, what it's about is, you just learned to simplify your life, you know, you've got so much extra burdens on you now. And stress, you've got to learn to just take off the extra stuff you don't need, you know what I mean? You just got to do that, like, anything you can simplify to make it lighter on yourself easy on yourself. That's what you do. You know,
like, honestly, I would sell some sisters if, like, for example, if they're really not coping, if the school is completely unreasonable, and they're not ready to be flexible about the homework, I would even consider, especially for people in Sydney, because we've got a long lockdown. Now we've got into September, if they're not coping, if they're just falling apart, I would honestly tell them, you know, what, put your kids in a public school, what's going to happen, you're gonna make their home anyway. You know, it's gonna be better for your mental health and your own short your child's mental health, that you're going to be like screaming that every day and going crazy, trying
to get them to do all this. Keep up to all the, you know, the demands of the school. So that's just one example. But honestly, you've got to learn to just cut back whatever you can if you're not coping.
And then the other thing, like, I've tried to do, like, I have a structure like, a lot of people knock down that just completely forget what day it is.
But like, I actually have, I have, because I have, I try and have a variety, I have a lot of like I make my week like,
I have a variety of activities my week. So I have like, like I have certain days I do exercise, for example, I have certain days. So it's sort of split up. And I have classes on different days. So because I have a program every single day, I'm doing different stuff. If you do that, if you can try and make a program for yourself a weekly program, daily program, you'll find the time we'll just go. Yeah. So you got to have structure, it's really important to have structure, you know, that's right.
Yeah, because normally, normally, you know, when we're out of lockdown, we've got like, you know, this day, we're going to work this, they're going to school, this time from this, we've got the routine, and then as soon as it's lost, that's when we feel like oh, you know, like, we get bored, or we just get sick of everything. And we just go to this, you know, mood that we don't want to do anything anymore. Yeah, that's really important to have structure like local hungry. Now I have to say for anyone at uni, they're really blessed because they've got something to do, you know, if you're not a uni, look, there's lots of online courses you could be doing, you know, you could just
do some self development courses, you know, anything like learn about how to manage your money better, learn about, I don't know, resilience, learn about conflict met, you know, conflict resolution skills, there's so many good skills you could actually learn in his time, like I wouldn't, I would just be throwing myself into, you know, thinking about what else I can do to kind of enhance myself during this time. If you can,
ya know, inshallah, like, honestly, just the main, the main thing is to give yourself some purpose during this time, like, don't just let this time pass like, you know,
um, the only thing I also believe in, people laugh at me, but this is what I do. I'm a real, I'm a real big.
I'm really big on pampering myself, like so. So for example, Michelle, I'm like one of my students got me this amazing aroma therapy, um, hand sanitizer, and absolutely loved the sanitizer. You should smell it. It smells absolutely amazing, right, because we have to use hand sanitizer a lot. So I thought you're getting it at least make it good. Make it
so when you smell these, it's actually like a stress therapy. So like, you know, you put it on your hands and it's like, like, it's just amazing, you know, so like, I'm just doing
stuff like that, that really like, like just pampering yourself. It's, you'd be surprised how that can really?
It can really
definitely does.
And then besides that, um, look, I think one thing, and a lot of people do say these, what lockdown does, he kind of makes you more introspective like you tend to be like, you start to appreciate the small things I don't know about you. But like, you start to appreciate the little things. Like, one thing I can do. I've been appreciating right now is the beautiful sunny weather. I don't know what you've got done there. We've had the most beautiful days. Yeah. Today was actually we had really, really nice weather today. And we're doing good. Anyway.
Appreciate you start to appreciate that this little I went out today, like I went for a walk with my buddies. Yeah, beautiful walk together. It was awesome. You know, like, so it was just absolutely beautiful walk not too far from my house, of course in the 5k zone, right.
But for a beautiful walk, and it was just, you know, really loud, honestly. And that's what really brings up the mood, you know, like, because you cannot see anyone. Um, that's what brings you down a lot, because not socializing. So like, even my son's been doing that sometimes. Actually, he's got a friend that they've not like within, you know, the same LGA. Yeah, like he caught up with him one time, because otherwise, you know, I know they set our quota on zoom, or, but no one does do that. Like we don't, we don't bother to sort of catch up on zoom or half the time.
Or the phone will stop studying. And yeah, didn't catch up for a walk. It's just an idea. Like, you're walking, you're getting exercise, but at least you get to talk to each other a bit as well. You know,
I think, you know, that's something and like, so I think that it's about also being a bit imaginative, you know, like, trying to find your way around.
You know, the different
the different sour, let's say obstacles we have right now.
Yeah. So I mean, look, I think, yeah, like I said, being grateful for the small things, you know, yeah, um, I was talking to a teacher overseas, you know, I mean, honestly, like, we do find it difficult without lockdown. But if you talk to people overseas, they want to let it go out. And all, there's no such thing as going out for exercise. I know we like to whinge about it, but the reality is, obviously, they didn't go out for any exercise, you know, they had to stay down. But some of them were in lockdown for like three months, no going out whatsoever. They couldn't even had half the time go shopping, they had sailors come around to their house, you know,
from the friends or families overseas.
Complete look that way, though. There was like sirens, well, where everyone just has to like, as soon as they hear it, they stay on it.
So we want to give them ideas, but
but yeah.
And then besides that, this is my I mean, not the other thing I love to do as well, this really brings you happiness. So like, I think it's about looking for things that really bring you joy
as much as you can, like
I love to sit in the sun and recite Quran. That's not like it really brings me a great deal of joy and happiness. So just you know, consciously looking for things that bring you happiness during this time is really important.
And then really important as well is avoiding stuff that is just going to stress you out. You know?
Like a lot of stuff that happens online is very stressful. But you know people are very wound up they can they can they can make you stressed as well. So
um, yeah, and then I know there's a lot going on in the world and a lot of people could get really down from that. But look, at the end of the day, Allah tala is only asking you what to do what you can so you can only you can you're only responsible for what you can change, you know what I mean? You can't do everything. You want everything so don't try and take on more than you're asked to do. Yeah, you know, because I think that that can overwhelm some people like look if all you can deal with that right now is your circumstances in lockdown then so be it you know, just usually with that now you focus on that you deal with your Eman and your you know your mental health with that's
that's it that's what you have to do right now. That's what you focus on
Yeah, yeah.
They don't want you said about building like, you know, doing courses online and building skills that can actually turn you know, you can like explore a hobby out of that, you know, some people don't have like,
I can feel it's on me and they can they can do like a photography course or I don't know like
calligraphy or something and then realize, Oh, you know, I like this so I'm like continue to do it. And indefinitely you know, like fills in that gap. If you have you know, free too much free time is not good sometimes. Say
Additionally, it would really help thing is to some might discover a new career, like a lot of people have changed careers now, like
some careers aren't, you know, you can't do them now during lockdown. However, other doors have opened up in other areas, because people need other things, you know,
sometimes you might just have to change direction, and that's what it's about.
That's definitely right. We also have another question about, um, you know, now that we're all stuck at home with our family members, how to say you know, how to make the most of that, and keep, you know, build that connection instead of like, I know, sometimes it can get, you know, annoying or whatever, you know, always spending the time with the same people. So it's like some ways we can, you know, build like a special connection with our family members and keep you know, close. Look, one thing is definitely praying together. You know, I think I've really enjoyed that. Like, because my, my son and my husband, they normally go pray in the masjid. Yeah, you know, with lockdown. You
know, you actually have your own Imam at home and hamdulillah.
And the prayers bring you together. So like, trying to always pray together as Gemma makes a big difference. And then besides that, just having family experiences like sitting together, making sure you eat together, like some families, unfortunately, don't eat together. And that's actually not recommended. I mean, not there can be some days you don't eat together, but most days you should eat together, it really brings you together, even if you're arguing on the table is still being brought together.
experiencing that hole. Because Mom always tells us this, like, every time we thought, she says, Oh, look at us now cuz she's a she's got nine other siblings and now
in a different country. Yes, you're not gonna appreciate that you're together until you Oh, like, separate and go into your own countries and whatnot. And then we're like, you know, we realize it's, it's crazy. Like she can't see her brothers, you know?
Like, she hadn't seen some of them for a few years. So it's really important. We appreciate those little things.
Yeah, like look on my kids. When they were at home together, a lot of them used to fight like there was no tomorrow but as soon as they moved to London now, they've now they're all beautiful, giving each other you know, a gifts and everything and like Wow,
that's a bj
suddenly, they just, you know, it may keep and being really kind to each other, my show lots of loss. There is light at the end of the tunnel, What haven't been enough
yet, but I mean, this, this, this, you'll find that this this lockdown. And this experience of the pandemic is going to bring the family close together, like it's gonna there's gonna be a lot of memories inshallah, that we've shared. And will and as even as a Muslim community, you know, going to go back to that time back in 2000. And
back in 2009, whenever when
you're wearing it one
time and you know, like, it's gonna get memory that we're gonna share, you know?
Yeah, definitely. So might as well make the most of it, you know? That's right.
At the end of the day,
I was gonna say like, it's important for people to like so I gave you some
I gave you some, like more general tips on how to cope mentally and everything but look,
look, this is a time for us to return back to the Quran. Okay.
People have to realize that the Quran is panela is so full of hope, you know, and strengthening you like you want to think those as all those as well coming down to the Prophet so longer someone who's going through the hardest trials, all kinds of untold trials and hardships and he was facing most of that all on his own besides a lot you know, I mean, he had those times we had no one you know, he just started off like, really alone and a lot of things he's facing on his own right, except for a lot of paradata you know, um, so if you think about the yes you know, that Allahu taala sent us this so comforting like if you can just turn to the Quran at times you know, try every day to read from
the Quran because and just focus and look out for those yet that are so comforting and make you realize it's gonna it's gonna it's gonna lift your spirits you know a little bit the iron for example to the bottom right most people know this idea you know MSC betong and tedros many johnetta Well I'm yeah Chico method will Latina follow me over the come like did you think that you're gonna enter Jana? Right. And I'm what came to people before you is not gonna happen to you
knew I was reminding us to do you think you're actually going to go to Jamaica and you're not going to go through trials like those people who came before you?
And then he tells us about how they went through all kinds of trials. To the level they said, Actually the level
that the Prophet goes with them and the people who believe said, You met her natural law, like when is the help of a law coming? Allah in the Nostromo he already really the help of Allah is near. So I know he's kind of a yet a so comforting and I'm just reflecting on the Syrah like these are yet we're coming down to the Messenger of Allah while he's going through all kinds of untold hardships. Right? And think about that time we're in that during the valleys, the harboured and the prophet SAW, I said, I'm like, they've been boycotted, they're under siege. And, like Alhamdulillah, our cupboards are full of hamdulillah in general, right?
Like rocks to their stomach from the hunger to prevent the hunger. So they went through so many of you read the series, it's a great time to
actually read the seer and reflect on a Syrah and just think that Do you really think you're going to go to general without some sort of trials, and halfway through, you know,
especially with the reading part, like, I think it's a great time to also spend a lot of time on reading, like,
proper stories, the Sera, Sera is beautiful, you know, like, there's so many things that
to learn in Islam, like no matter how much you look into it, there's always so much more. It's very comforting, because you realize this is normal part of life, you know? And then you read the ad all day, like Allah says, Can early Kalyan with WWE for ad that's what I tell now who Tom Taylor, like, he tells us like, this is how we can fit you and support your heart like we strengthen your heart with this a yet so you know, like these yet? That's what they fought they were sent to strengthen you. Yeah, right. And just like they strengthen the Messenger of Allah, they can strengthen me and you as well.
You know, Panama. So, um, and the other thing I should mention, you know, we just had our shot, right? Yeah. Yeah, well, think about the message of ashuelot. Like, it's a perfect time to actually have Ashura because one of the greatest lessons we take out of the young, like, the day of ashuelot, is that as long as you have Allah with you, right, then you can get through anything much, right? Because if you think about the story, what happened for more stylized celeb, right? So, you know, he's, he and his, you know, Benny Australian.
They, like, fell in his, you know, armies, you know, chasing them until they get to the sea. And then they find themselves
cornered, you know, like, the only thing is they've got fit on these armies behind them. And
there's nowhere to turn right. Yeah. So it's okay, it looks like hopeless situation.
And Ben Israel, the people from any story that had some doubts that Allah has to avoid, but in a lot of what they said I had bad thoughts about a lot. They said, basically, that's it, we're finished. You know,
we've got Yeah, we've done exactly. And they will listen and say on
color, you know, in the lobby say yesterday, like, you know, he told him no, a lot of times without Yeah, and so kind of a long time I saved him. So like, the thing is, that message that we get out of our SRA, we just had it yesterday, depending on what day you know, Wednesday, but the point is
perfect time for us to have a shout out because we're going through this lockdown and just think that you know, yes, this is not an easy thing we're going through okay, but as long as we have Allah with us, we will find our way through this. Just like most nslm and his you know, he got through the sea we've been a street and all that I saved saved them. We will also be saved but in the lab we will we will get through this pandemic inshallah you know, we'll be safe he knew that Allah look after us.
Yeah, inshallah.
Michelle it's really great reminders to kind of like I feel like we're all need this you know, these reminders sometimes like we might all know you know, I lost funds I was always with us but sometimes we just forget now like we can bridge point where we're just like no, like, you know, everything just not working. You're just in this mood that you're you know, you're out of it and you know, you tend to forget a lot like that a loss panda is always with you. And he's he won't you know he won't burn into soul more than it can be.
Right. We also just want to address
any like depression or anxiety in these times.
A lot of V 12 students or even little kids or, you know, teenagers or people go through a lot of difficulties.
And also,
you know, like this thing that
People have, you know, I've heard this before, like, if you if you get depression or anxiety, that means your email is low or weak. So just want to, you know, get into this a little.
Absolutely, yeah. Look, um
one thing a lot of people don't realize is that
it is really important to look after our mental health, you know, and mental health can actually have, it can actually if your mental health is not in a good state, it can actually impact on your spiritual connection. You know, and a lot people don't realize that.
Because what happens is when you're in when you're in a poor state mental health, it actually affects your whole outlook on everything. Like, you see, everything is just, you know, black around you basically right?
You see, hoping everything and so you actually even think call How could Allah forgive me, you know, helpful, you know, what's the use of me praying because I'm not going to go to Jana. Anyway, you get yourself into this really negative mindset.
Like, I mean, recently, for example, I had this beautiful sister because I get sisters contact me all the time, right? Yeah.
You walking around? I'm just putting
them to me. You know, I almost forgot to charge my phone.
Yeah, that's okay.
Anyway, so I'm saying to you, I lost you there for a minute. But I'm gonna tell you. So the thing is,
like, I had this beautiful sister contact me recently, you know, a lot of sisters contact me with this issue, you know? Yeah. Um, and she was basically saying, this is really sad, you know, she's going through so many trials at home, okay. And she was saying to me, but you know, I pray you know, I pray as much as I can. And I can't feel anything and I'm just struggling. And I don't know why. She just, she's like, hating on herself so much, because she can't feel her prayer because she, you know, she, like, she's, she's saying to herself, because I'm praying and because I'm doing bigger, I'm doing my Quran, therefore, I shouldn't be feeling like this.
You know, me, and that makes her feel even more hopeless. Yeah, so what I tell people what I tell people, I say to them, Look, if you know, that you are doing, you know, you're doing your prayers, you know, you're trying your hardest to pray your prayers, or your you're doing your Deacon, you know,
and you're not feeling and you're still not feeling good. Despite what you're doing. It's time to seek help. Yeah, you don't try to say because, yes, you're like, definitely, you know, praying your prayers, brings you a great sense of peace during a vicar, you know, reading Quran, all of those things are there to support you. Okay? But if you've got other issues going on, right, and some of these issues might not be in your life right now could have happened to you in your childhood that you could be through, that's impacting you that you didn't even really think about, you know, and that surfing surfacing now, as an adult, that can sometimes happen to people. So what I'm saying to
you, if you're just feeling low, you're feeling like you're not, you know, you're just feeling really,
you know, negative, and I'm not feeling hopeful that anything, it's time to get help, you know, and hamdulillah we are so blessed in Australia, to have so many resources. You know, we've got so many more some psychologists, you know, and when you go to those Muslim psychologists Masha Allah, like,
you know, the beauty is that they've got the, they've got the knowledge of psychology to help you, but then they bring Islam into a truth that Allah subhanaw taala. And, you know what I mean? So we so blessed to have that. I mean, look, you can get telehealth these days, you know, like, you can,
you know, you can get suspicions like, no, like, there's like, I think 12 sessions, or 20 sessions for free, or something a year, isn't it? Something like that? Yeah, I've heard of that. Yeah. It's something like 12 sessions for free, you know, like, Um,
so, you know, and you can get it on zoom. You know, you don't have to go and sit, you don't have to you don't have to leave your home. You can actually do it from home. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, but knowledge is power. Knowledge is always power, you know, because there's a lot of things that you don't necessarily understand about your brain, the way it works,
you know, different things that you can be doing to sort of help yourself and also just understanding is of why are you thinking in such a negative way, you know, so that can help you so much. And so what I say to people is, if that's your case, work on your mental health, go work with someone you know, professional, and then you will find that subpoena law. Once you
work out what's going on with yourself, right mentally, your mental state, you start to heal that it will have an impact on everything else, your relationships, your connection with the loss of pantalla will improve everything. And you start to enjoy your praise again. Yeah. So it's it's sort of like a vicious circle, really, you know, if you if you're not in a good place, like I said, we do mental health, then it is going to impact on it can impact on your,
you know, on your
spiritual connection, and we have to realize that people can be tested with, you know, with different types of mental illness just like they're tested with physical illnesses. That's right, that's something people don't understand, why doesn't it make logical sense that if you get tested with different types of physical illnesses, that you couldn't be tested also in mental illnesses? Of course, you could, you know, and if you look in the Quran, you know, we have a your Elisa Lam, he had, he had he was tested in a physical illness. Yeah, but if you look at your
test, it was more like a mental type of illness that we had a very deep sadness.
So it was different, no like, and in fact, his sadness, as as Allahu taala describes to us was so severe, that it began to affect him physically, where he even, you know, he affected his eyesight. Yeah.
So, like I'm saying, so we have to realize that, you know, this could be someone's test, they could be tested with a type of depression or type of anxiety.
But also remember that that's not lost with a loss of pantalla, like, you'll be rewarded for that being the lead. That's, that's a way of having your scenes expiated for you. Right. So,
you know, so just seek help, because it really concerns me when
Muslims unfortunately, in a lot of cases, they, they see it as weakness, for them to go and seek help. That.
Yeah, and that is actually can I tell you, it takes a great deal of courage to recognize that you need help, and to go seek that help. That's the brave person.
That's what's that's courageous to realize you actually not coping, and that you need help.
Right, and to reach out and get that help. That's, that's what you call courage. Right? So this, we have to change, we have to change that mindset amongst Muslims.
That's Sharla.
I think,
especially when, you know, when someone's got so much going on, they, like you said at the start, you know, self care is very important, especially in the science. So I found that when someone's got, you know, a lot of things going on, they just tend to forget about themselves, or they put themselves loss.
And I found that with like, mothers as well, like, especially,
you know, like with my mom, you know, she's got like the house, like six kids, and then she's teaching on zoom, and kids like doing mush on them classes, and you know, all these things, and she'll tend to forget about, you know,
like herself and what she's going through. So I think that's also like, it really,
I don't know how to explain it, like it, you know, when someone's got so many things going and not focusing on themselves at the same time, that's when they start to lose, and it will take longer for them to recognize that, look, you know, they're not coping and they do, you know, need that extra help.
It's a very October, I'll tell you something, it's a very common mistake that lots of women fall into. Yeah, and I did the same thing.
And that's why I try to teach my students not to do the same thing. Now, because I did that, like, we women, we tend to not just women then to write but it's just a women tend to do this a lot. Like they just give out give out all the time. And they especially as mothers, because it just get exhausted because there's just no time for you. This especially practically no time for yourself at all, especially got young children, right. So you just give out give out, you just totally did not think that you actually need to also give to yourself to be able to continue to give to the rest of the family.
So a lot of a lot of women fall into that and they end up
something ends up happening to them.
They you know, ends up
you know, different things will happen to them. Eventually, they'll realize that you can't keep going on they just get go through burnout, basically they go through
um, and they, unfortunately so much to learn the hard way that that's not going to work, you know?
That's right.
Yeah, Allah help us through all of this. I mean, you're all baby. And just one more thing.
Just with all the
You know, restrictions going on and the laws that are placed
to emphasize on, you know, being as Muslims to follow the rules that we get faced with or any laws that we get, you know, that get imposed on us. It's, you know, it's part of our religion, you know, the country that we're living in, to just follow the laws that they, you know, imposed on us rather than rebelling. Or, you know, like I understand it can get tough and sometimes it is, you know, good to speak up, of course, but, you know, to be done in the right way, and just, you know, remember to be role models for the rest of the community inshallah? Well, I think as well look at it like this from this perspective, as well.
At the end of the day,
you've got to learn as a Muslim, that there are things we can change and the things that we can't change, you know, what I'm trying to say, and when you try to go up against a brick wall,
you're not going to get very far and you end up just hurting yourself and making yourself you know, basically frustrated, and you're going to just waste a lot of stress and anger and probably bring more harm to yourself mentally. Um, you know, and just getting angry, like, what's the use, you know, at the end of the day, I want everyone to also remember that whatever is happening to us, I know that we can be angry about the way things are being done and stuff like that. But let's also reflect on the fact that whatever is happening to us is also written was also written, okay for us 50,000 years before the creation of the heavens and the earth. Okay, so we, we as Muslims do have to
come back to our core beliefs, you know, some people you know, this is a trial for you and it's true for me, it's true for everyone to realize that yes, we can accept that. There can be people for example, doing plans in the world and stuff like that, but let's not you know, lay our beliefs in these things get to a point where it actually contradicts our Arpita you know, where we think that these forces have greater power or control over what Allah wills and you know, the ultimate power that Allah has over all of our fears, okay. So you know, like if you think about that how do
you know which the prophet SAW longer sometimes even our best you know, why lamb and then all matter? lunch dinner, I lay answer Okay, B shade in lamb Yun farehawker lamb Shea in Cabo logwood. deck, right. While which demo on a yo boo boo cabbie shading lamea boo boo, get your levy shade in Khattab? Allah who I like, right? So even if all of the you know, even if all the nations had gathered together to cause you some harm, they wouldn't be able to do that. And this is what Allah has already written. So if you can realize that, yes, we don't like these lock downs. They're not fun. Okay? However, let's just be realistic about these. It's do what Allah has written for us,
okay, Allah wrote it 50,000 years before the creation of the heavens and the earth. So it's better for you just to come to peace with it, you know, come to peace with it, and learn to be flexible. Okay, because that's something that our religion actually teaches us
about being flexible, like, if you look at what the prophet SAW Lotus and tells us, he says, other than the ambling workmen in the AMA Hall, hula hula height, okay like that the fear of the believer is something amazing and that everything that happens to a believer is always hired why because the believer when something happens to a believer they just changed direction no matter Yanni and it's always for the highest they look for the higher end whatever they going through like this think about this reflect on shall he said even to me Oh ashmont law, right.
I liked his I just absolutely adore his statement that he made when he said you know, what can my enemies do to me?
If they increase in me,
it will be highly one I'll be alone with Allah azza wa jal, right? No, I'll be in seclusion with a loss of counselor. If they exile me,
I'll be a tourist and I'll be I'll be reflecting upon the creations of Allah. And if they kill me obviously heat
you know, so what I'm trying to say is the believer always looks for the higher in whatever situation they're put under. That's why Yanni wouldn't have time to be like getting angry and going for what's the use, they're not gonna change. You're just gonna bring harm on yourself and harm on others. You don't I mean, so better for you to put your energy into doing something beneficial during this time. Just accepted and you know, as the messenger
A lot told us he tells us it hurts. It hurts. Elena young folk, right? Yeah.
always focus on what will benefit you, right? was staying below and seek the hope of Allah will adages and do not become hopeless. Yeah. Don't Don't be hopeless and don't think you can't do something any. So that's what you look for Look, look for what benefits you focus on what's really going to benefit you benefit your alma
and don't waste your your energy and anger and stress and you're just going to be what are you going to do, you're just going to make your your mental health
disturb your family, distribute your, you know yourself and cause more harm to yourself like I you know, maybe get arrested and cause more harm than it was to you. And your your mother will be upset with, you know, upset because of what happened to you and cause grief to your family and why it's such a, you know, they've got a program that all around the world doing lockdown. Yeah. Australia, it's everywhere. And, like, I'm not gonna give them ideas, but the reality is the lockdown in Australia, we're still able to do things they can't do overseas. That's right, you know, overseas,
they won't even crop with half this behavior about
that look on three, something I did want to talk about before we before we finish. Yeah, of course, I think it's really important to talk about it, right? Because the two things that are shown to really make people happy, and one of the reasons why they say Muslims are particularly happy more than other people. handily, that is number one, because our spiritual connection, but also number two
is the community. Right now. I want to just, you know, remind everybody of how important it is for us going through such a trial we're going through right now, to really hold tight to your safety networks. Okay, um, now is it time for us more than ever, we need to, like really hold on to our, you know, sisterhood and brotherhood and community and not be divided. It's very important, right? Because that's the main thing that's gonna help you get through this, you know, times like this. Right. And I think you would know, I mean, we've all seen it like that. One of, I think one of the hardest tests that many people have experienced with this pandemic, um, which has made coping with
so much more difficult, has actually been the harshness that some people have encountered. You know,
and the fighting that's been occurring, you know, between, like,
between sisters in Islam or brothers in Islam, or, you know, even family members, right, I have a different issue. Yeah. Yeah. Like people got strong opinions, but they're letting those opinions get to the point where they're actually cutting ties of each other, or, you know, just being so harsh. And
we have to realize that, you know, it's what, what strengthens us, is when we are united, but what actually weakens us individually and as a community is division. That's right. And there's actually a really beautiful idea in the Quran. The Alo talent tells us what are the keys to success, you know, when you're faced with a real hardship, right? And just reflect on these this idea right? So a lot of data says in the Quran, you know, yeah, living at Amazon, either lucky 10 feet at 10 to two, right? If you face a force then cesspool Stenson was good Ilaha Castillo Allah Allah come to feefo right and then remember a lot a lot. So you'll be successful. So first of all, stand firm, stand
firm, be patient, right?
Remember a lot a lot to make yourself be able to do that. And then he says, well, viola, what well I saw level right. So a bail law state stay stuck to the path of Allah and His messenger. And then this is where to naza
protection, do not divide. If you divide for tough, shallow, whatever, it hukum if you divide, then you will fail.
And your strength will go out of you.
Well, spirou in nama hammer, sobbing, be patient and almost with the patient. That's right. So this is the sort of Thank you, but really, if you can spend some time during this time to turn back to the court on you'll find the answers are there what what you're looking for, how do I stay strong in this pandemic? How do I stay strong in trials? It's all in the Quran all the answer then, right? Someone that like what is this?
Um
it's um, I'll send it to you after the I'll put it in the comments. Yeah.
After we finish this session, but the point is that I'm just trying to show you that the importance of staying together especially in trials, right, this is what actually, you know, strengthen up strengthens us. And look sisters and brothers, you know, it's enough the trial we're going through is enough without putting on top of that, you know, you know, feeling everybody knows the bad feeling that you get when you have a problem with another sister or brother. And just that harshness it's like, support where you can tolerate sometimes from saying non Muslims talking to you like that. But when it's your own brothers and sisters in Islam, it affects you so much more. Yeah, I
think most people can agree with that, right.
But I want to say something he true. And that is, look, everybody was just realized that everyone is feeling really vulnerable right now. Okay, so what i what i really advise everybody is trying to make a lot of excuses for others, I know that a lot of people may have hurt you from what they've said. But we don't understand what kind of problems that sister or that brothers going through behind the scenes, like, people don't always tell you what they're going through, right. And let's just try our best to like, step back, when someone's, you know, maybe attacking us, you know, like,
you know, a lot of stuffs been going on, you know, me, but if you see that just take a step back and realize they're most likely projecting because something else is going on in their life. Right? That's one thing. And then if look at yourself as well, like, if you find yourself lashing out, like, if you're the one who's been lashing out on people, you know, attacking people because of their views. Like why, like, you know, why would you attack people? You know, why would you? Do you don't want to say like, then maybe you need to take care of your own self? You know what I mean? Because if you don't, ultimately, ultimately, even if we don't agree with each other, does that mean
we have to hate each other now? And over dunya it's not even something in the deep end, even in deep, we're allowed to have different opinions.
You know, to me,
we should not let that come between in our sisterhood and brotherhood, right? So if you find yourself lashing out on people, you that's also assigned to you, like, Wait a second, things are not going right, you know, you need to actually go look after yourself a bit more, you know, you obviously like, not in a good place right now. Yeah, right. So just try everybody to be just a little bit Kinder. And do it for the sake of Allah. Do it for the sake of Allah, you know,
the Messenger of Allah told us your ham manfield out, yo, hammacher Mansi summer, like, you have mercy with those on Earth, the one in the heavens will have mercy with you, you know, you want them all to be merciful with you, and have more RAM in your life. Try to have more rational with others have more mercy. That's how we're supposed to be as believers with each other. We're not supposed to be harsh with each other. We're supposed to be gentle with each other, you know, especially when we, when everyone's going through such a hard time right now. But that's what people want, they need that they really need that gentleness, because there's too much harshness out there.
I was gonna say like, that's important, you know, that brotherhood and sisterhood is important in our everyday life, you know, let alone in this time, where everyone's going through the same thing. You know, everyone can be Moody, you know, going through all different trials, like you said, we just need to really stick to each other. Like this. There's no there's always going to be different opinions. Not everyone's gonna agree.
I guess that's what makes us grow together. You know, it makes us grow together even more, because we can understand our you know, each other's differences, but still, you know, we all have the same goal. You know, at the end of the day, we're strong. Tyler, you know, we're doing everything we can for the sake of Allah.
Yeah, hello, Michelle. A very beautiful words. Only these spiritual reminders. barakallahu li ke Chima.
We're just gonna address some of the questions in the chat.
Um, inshallah this live will be uploaded. Yes. So we're gonna save and upload on the page.
Okay.
Okay, there's a few questions. All right, we've got one I'm a Muslim river and handler it's so hard to stop listening to music. What are your recommendations?
Yes, so,
um, I had a lot of trouble getting off music too. But if you think about honestly music, the way I could equate it, it's almost like a drug. And you have to wean yourself off.
But when you get off it, you'll be amazed how much better you're gonna feel. So, because what it does he kind
I've just mixed you really stuck to the dunya. Um,
what i what i what helped me was getting into the sheets.
So like, I used to listen to the sheets, like extending the sheets that were always about a loss of pantalla you know, so I found that really helped me. Um, and also, obviously, I said learning the Quran as well, so that that really helped me and
after a while, like it takes a while to get off it. It takes quite a few years to get it out of your system. But once you do you you don't look back like you. It's like you've you've detoxed you've got to detox from it. That's That's exactly what I had to do I did from it. And then I got to a point right she couldn't stand it. I actually could not stand it anymore so panels that just shows you that it really is very addictive.
Yeah, finding that like an alternative you know, like finding an alternative not just cutting you off completely. Yeah.
Beautiful, huh? To try to initiate this and beautiful nice shoes. Yeah, like come You know, what's his name? My Zeno resign me.
Try to get the ones without instruments if you can, is really good as well.
Yeah.
I think that's a struggle that we all go through.
All right, we've got
sure where else is that Christians
are if anyone has any questions, feel free to post them in the comments.
We've got a comment from Gong found that the quiet time feels a bit like a normal blog in that there is more time for seclusion and introspection. Yeah. No, yes. Mashallah helps you slow down and focus on different things like normally we're in a rat race. For those of you who go to work, everyday got rush off out the door.
uni, it's just like a rat race. But we've got,
we can look at it, like we've got our energy a lot more conserved in it, we're able to just go, like it's much more peaceful outside, you know, you're able to focus on different things. Think about life. You know, as I said, introspective, you become a lot more introspective. Like, think about your life, the way the life, your life's going, what you want to really do with your life. Like ponder on this whole test of that the pandemic, how in any minute Allahu taala can change all of our affairs. You know, in any minute I can take our blessings away from from us. So we really have to be grateful for what we have and always thank Allah and just seek newness to him because we don't know
how much longer we have on this planet.
Yet searchers know
hamdulillah I'm just trying to see if we've got any more questions.
Shall we go someone from India, saying God 600 Al Hamdulillah Malik said from all of us, may Allah bless everybody who came tonight and ask the Lord Allah to fill your hearts with Amen. And you know, and your home's been Allah insha Allah.
Allah spent Allah reward you check on that was a very, very beautiful words.
You know, amazing reminders that we'll all need to hear, and shall all have, you know, more and more sessions like this, where more people can, you know, have a chance to ask questions we can go through, you know, other issues as well that are happening. You know, anyone who has like recommendations for things that they would like us to discuss in Sharla
we can go through them. I think there's one more question here.
How can I grieve the loss of my dad, we couldn't go to his burial because of the restrictions. My love mercy.
Okay, so remember that you can benefit your father earlier, Hummel so much through your diet,
through subtle, subtle jatiya write these things will benefit him so greatly. So if you're able to, you know, take from his from from the inheritance that's left over, invested in, you know, in some sort of some sort of agenda, whether it's a Masjid or a well or, you know, anything that Muslims will benefit from, that he got gets a continual reward in his grace, you know, and, you know, making making a lot of joy and just being a righteous child because that's what's going to benefit him the most because we know that there's actually an aeration that mentions about
that, that person he finds himself being elevated to a to another state's you know, status in jamna. He said to he says to a lot of pantalla but
How did I get to the status in general because I didn't, I didn't do the deeds to, um
you know, make myself get to this level. And then I'll tell a little fella tells him because you had a pious child who made you know, jobs for you and you know, your your father benefits through through the deeds that you do as a child get Stan as his child so you can actually help your father, your father to do even, you know, to be elevated new status due to your own piety. So the best thing you could do now is make yourself become closer to Allah Subhana Allah as much as you can. And also your drive is more likely to be accepted in such a state as well.
So focus, always sisters and brothers, focus on what you can do, don't focus on like, we cannot change things are going to happen in life which we have got no control over, we can sit the rest of our life feeling burnt that we couldn't do something and that is just going to be negative for you. However, you can focus on what you can do. You know and remember that's what Allah wrote in through you feel angry that they didn't let you see your father but it's do what Allah wrote isn't like Allah write it for you. So
focus on what you can, you know, focus on the good and what you can change inshallah. Pamela, so that's beautiful.
I think we've got two more inshallah. How do you not feel guilty watching TV? Sometimes I watch TV news or just something with the kids but constantly feel guilty and make sure I don't let it affect my day.
Yeah, look, it's okay to have, you're allowed in Islam, people understand this. It's allowed in Islam to have a break. And you do some recreation, as long as you're not seeing or harming your eyes, you know what I mean? So you're just watching the news, or you're watching something permissible, not you know, there's nothing wrong with having a break. And then after that, you get back into doing you know, other things beneficial things inshallah. So just means balance is them teaches us balance. Yeah.
Thank you, okay.
I think it's also you know, amen can goes up and down as well. You know, we don't always have to be elements never gonna stay, you know, top, it's always going to be going up and down. So you need to refresh yourself. If you don't do some other things. You can't be sitting all day and night reading Quran and praying, okay, you need to, even the scholars themselves used to do they used to do some recreational things in between to refresh themselves from time to time, and then they go back into you know, there are other types of bands or and stuff like that. So your human being, you know,
wherever you
think will take this last question. So Allah
says, The please share, what did you study
another session to
leave everyone we're just before before it cuts off. I think it's important, we just dress on to things right. Look to everybody. There's nothing blameworthy about you know, turning to Allah to Allah and showing him your absolute feeling of, you know, overwhelmed and feeling incapable there's nothing wrong with you, you know, 22 a lot of crying your eyes out, like you know what I mean, showing how much you're not coping there's nothing wrong with that. And then secondly, there's nothing wrong with you seeking the means to strengthen yourself. You know, a lot of data lumps and what meaning are we hired on what have we lulla mean and what may not buy like the strong what mean
is more loved than the than the weak mean, even though they both loved what does that mean? You go and strengthen yourself by you seeking out like a psychologist or someone to help you with your when you're not coping. You'll strengthen yourself by that inshallah. Okay, all right, everybody, so don't don't there's nothing it's as I said before, it's courage to seek out the help if you're being brave by doing that.
Yeah, that's beautiful Sharma.
Okay, I think we can wrap it up for today. Zack, everyone for joining us and for your lovely questions and a great big thank you and well let's find our body chef on demand, then
you'll find his handle everyone loved everything. He said. I definitely benefited a lot from the dealer. And I hope everyone did too, and share a little have more and more of these sessions to come. So keep a lookout inshallah. And we'll just thank them again for giving us your beautiful advice and wisdom and time as well.
It was an absolute pleasure. May Allah bless you all in Shell and keep you all safe. You and your families and