Tom Facchine – Be Easy With People – Worry About Yourself

			There's
		

			a lot of there's, there's a balance to be to be struck with command and good and forbidding evil, a
lot of people I think are under a false impression about what it means I'm gonna be a matter of when
not
		

			a lot of people imagine, you know,
		

			correcting absolutely everything that they see going on from other people. And my observation is
that it has led a lot of people to focus on what other people are doing as at the expense of
focusing on themselves. And that's just my observation, I see a lot of people that are way more
concerned with other people toeing the line on this or toeing the line on that,
		

			as opposed to themselves. And there's a balance, right, there's a balance.
		

			We're all in the same boat. And if someone is committing major sins, like say, let's say you're in a
community, and somebody has a store convenience store, and that person sells alcohol, or that person
sells drugs, that person sells lottery tickets, like these are bad things. You know, now you should
try to exercise as much wisdom as possible when it comes to trying to
		

			successfully lead that person out of that behavior. That's better language to think about.
Correcting, right, because you, you think of correcting it's like, well, I just get to go in there
and blast the truth. And, you know, let the chips fall where they may. If they disagree with me,
then that's their problem, I delivered the I delivered the hawk. Right, that's their their issue
now.
		

			That to me, I mean, that lacks a little bit of sincerity, because every single Muslim wants the
prophesy. Salam said that none of you believe until you want for your brother, what you want for
yourself. So put yourself in that situation. If you're committing that sin, you need somebody or you
would want somebody to lead you out of that sin in a beautiful way, in a way that was easy for you
to accept in a way that was easy on the neffs. And not really hard on your pride. Right? So instead
of being very combative, or instead of being kind of young, a lot of times these things happen in
public right, or they have somebody you have no relationship with, right, you're definitely going to
		

			increase the likelihood that this person is going to be led out of the sin that they're doing. If
you are, you know, attentive to those things, you want to approach somebody through someone who they
respect someone that they have a relationship with, you want to approach somebody in a private way
in a way that enables them to save face. And the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam did this with Abu
Sufian. And it blows me away. Right when it comes to other Soufiane. We all know his story. And when
he brought out of Sofia, and out before that to Mecca, and he marches the army right underneath of
him, and I was with Yan is all about to accept Islam, but he still has that pride. And the Prophet
		

			saw you said and threw him a bone. He said, You know, it's like, Look, if you go back to Mecca, you
become a Muslim, and your house will be safe. And anybody who comes to you will be safe. You know,
the prophesy, Salam didn't call them out and say, well, you're being arrogant. You're being this
and, you know, why don't you change, you know, like, it, it was kind of a that's hard for me even to
reckon with the fact that he didn't call out that spiritual disease that Abu Sufian was was
struggling with, he actually worked with it. He's like, okay, he likes he's, he's pridefully, the
prideful person, he worked with the pride instead of trying to call out and shame him for the pride
		

			that he was having. So that's all about, you know, quote, unquote, correcting others, or maybe the
better language would be to gently lead people out of out of sinful behavior in a in a beautiful
way.
		

			But in reality, and again, this is my observation, a lot of people, this ends up being just a big
trap for them. Like, they end up
		

			focusing way more on other people than they do on themselves. And you have to realize that the
shaytaan is real, and that the shaytaan doesn't care which extreme you fall into. If he can drag you
down to the right, he's going to drag you down to the right, if you can drag him down to the left,
he's going to drag you down to the left. And if he can keep you busy with other people's stuff, at
the expense of your own stuff, and he's going to do it. Right. And so Sheikh Abdullah used to tell
us all the time, you know, this is the attitude we're talking about, you know, you you're somewhat
practicing, you're sitting around with your bros in the machine, and you start talking about other
		

			people. And you start talking about the bad stuff that they do and so and so drinks and so on, and
so sells this and so and so says that you're gossiping, first of all,
		

			and then what do you say May Allah guide them? May Allah guide them? Oh, look at you how righteous
you are. You may do for them to do that man. Take up tell us to tell us May Allah guide you. Don't
worry about them. You worry about yourself.