Tim Humble – Mental Health, Depression, and Wiswaas

Tim Humble

[Southampton]

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AI: Summary ©

The conversation covers the negative impact of social anxiety and the importance of following Prophet's teachings in shaping behavior. The speakers emphasize the need for a way to manage anxiety, manage stress, and avoid negative emotions, and emphasize the importance of finding the right partner and following the Prophet's teachings. healthy relationships and finding one's true self are also key drivers of success.

AI: Summary ©

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			just temporarily instead of stressing over it we'll just switch the microphone to the laptop
microphone the backup
		
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			two
		
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			double A batteries could you get me some
		
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			I've got them but I don't know what I've got no idea what I did was
		
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			okay I don't know the live stream I don't know if they got any of this I feel like they got they got
Yanni just intermittent amount of of information. But the first thing we spoke about is there hasn't
what called will handle the law lady and her annual hasn't in our Benalla photo Shaco
		
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			they said all praises to Allah Who made this hasn't gone away and we said hasn't is grief over
something. It's grief over something that happened in
		
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			the past. So someone has got some trauma in their life, and it's caused them to grieve over it to be
sad over what happened in the past. And Allah azza wa jal tells us in Jannah that there is no
heaven. There is no sadness, there is no trauma, there is no depression there is no grief.
		
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			So this is the first one the Quran tells us about when this hasn't becomes worse it becomes prison.
		
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			Like Allah azza wa jal said What are well?
		
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			What Karla SFR either use of WebGL but ie now who mean who's Neva Calvi?
		
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			Yaqoob turned away from them. And he said, Oh, my sorrow overuse of and his eyes became blind from a
husband, for who are covering and that shows you that issues relating to someone's mental health. It
can actually cause a person physical illness. He became blind because of his grief over what
happened to us of ybr but I know whom in a husband, his eyes became blind because of grief, for who
are calling him and he was concealing.
		
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			And this is the extreme grief that leads a person to physical illness yet
		
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			and from it is algum.
		
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			And Allah azza wa jal said, firstly, Jebin Allah when a Jaina who made me work early can only mean
we answered him, and we saved him from a lamb. They say algorithm it is the
		
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			distress of a situation that is ongoing in your life. So this situational has an enhancement, it's
gone it happened use of his gun finished. And it's happened in the past.
		
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			I love album is something which is still ongoing. It's a current emergency, a current matter of
stress and distress. You're you're stressed about the situation. And you're panicking about the
situation that you're in right now. Somebody's got money problems, somebody's got various
difficulties that they're going through, but they're going through those difficulties right this
minute at this moment in time.
		
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			They're going through these issues right now at this moment in time.
		
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			So we call it algum. And again, Allah azza wa jal tells us that we will be saved from this distress
and that we can be saved from this run this distress and this anxiety. We can be saved from it.
		
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			When we make dua to Allah subhanaw taala
		
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			What did Jakob call upon Allah with La Ilaha? Illa? Anta Subhana Allah in the Quran to me now volley
mean, there is no God worthy of worship but you Oh ALLAH Exalted are you indeed hours from the wrong
doing people out from the people who did wrong?
		
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			So, what we can take from this is that Tober is a major way of addressing these issues.
		
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			A major way of addressing our stress and our distress and our problems is Toba to come back to Allah
to repent to Allah miRNAs elit musi veteran in Lebanon, as is the famous proverb it's not a hadith,
but a famous statement, that no calamity ever be filled before the person except because of their
sin, the horrible facade to feel better you will be Marchesa, but at NUS
		
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			Leo the calm bow of Allah the
		
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			law of
		
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			corruption has appeared on land and at sea because of what the hands of men have done, your own
hands have done. So they may take some of what they have done and they may come back to Allah azza
wa jal.
		
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			With that being said, and that being understood, so we now understood that Toba and turning back to
Allah azza wa jal is a major means of relieving your sadness and your stress and your grief.
		
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			And making dua to Allah is a major way of relieving your stress and your distress in your grief.
Fernanda feel vote Almighty Allah ilaha illa Anta Subhana Allah in the contribution of volume in
first A jabber Allah when Ajay now Hamid alum worker that he cannot mean, so we answered him, and we
saved him from his distress. And in this way we will save every single believer and he everyone who
makes to add to Allah with that dua La Ilaha. illa Anta Subhana in the countrymen of Valley mean,
Allah azza wa jal promises to save them from their distress.
		
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			Allah azza wa jal tells us about Al him
		
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			Allahumma inni Udo becoming a Hemi will has an O Allah, I seek refuge with you from Allah hem. What
IS LM?
		
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			And hem is anxiety over the future. So what did we say Al Hasan is the past you had a grief, a
moment of grief a moment of trauma in the past, you can't get over it. It's just bouncing around in
your mind. This we call Al Hasan. If it starts to produce physical illness, we call it herzan. Then
you get something which is still happening right now I'm going through it today. I'm going through
it right at this minute, this moment in time we call it algum. And then there is panicking over the
future and we call it a hammer. But one of the things I really really like
		
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			about this word is that this word is the same word for being busy with something. For example, you
say, hammer the shape, and he he was given importance to something he was preoccupied with it.
		
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			Almost like you say He intended it. So the thing which is bouncing around in your head, and you are
preoccupied by it, you can't think straight you can't do your work because this thing is in your
head. And it's something you tell worker Oh, you expect it's going to happen? It hasn't happened
yet. And this anxiety over the future is something to seek refuge with Allah from.
		
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			Yes, it's true. And here we can bring in a very important Hadith, the Hadith. And there's some
weakness in it but the concept of the hadith is absolutely fine. It's mentioned in numerous Hadith
the concept.
		
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			Men Jalil humo, Muhammad Anwar Hayden, hammer him men Jalil Houma Herman noir Hayden Hamel Mahad
		
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			Kapha hula hula hammer dunya.
		
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			Woman Tushar backfeed human fi Ohmori dunya LEM Newberry la houfy a deity ha Halak. I'll come a call
a SallAllahu Ariosa whoever makes their him one hand. They make they're preoccupied their worries
the things that they're worried about and preoccupied about? They make it one concern. What should
it be? Malacca hammelmann
		
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			the hem of the akhira. So a person tries to transfer the exam anxiety onto what onto the outcome.
They try to transfer their anxiety by thinking about
		
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			To accurate, because there is no doubt, there is one thing that cures an anxiety, and that is having
a bigger problem to worry about. So everybody tried that and you're worried about something, and
then a bigger problem comes along that other thing is very small now, because you have something
bigger to worry about. As a Muslim, you always have something bigger to worry about. And that is the
actual
		
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			time you are sick. What? You are sick, what is that sickness in comparison to standing in front of
Allah? You're scared? What is that fear in comparison to
		
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			crossing the Ciroc? You're in a state where you're poor. What is that? That poverty in comparison to
being thrown into? Johanna
		
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			is nothing. So when you get perspective, your anxiety decreases. You don't we see young kids will
Allah He panicking over their exams,
		
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			like stressed over the exams, and you know, I'm not going to pass my exam on my exam and they're
panicking over it. And Wallah, he you say to them, just leave, you could just see the two years
after your exam, Wallah, you wouldn't think about your exam at all.
		
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			Because what comes is more stress.
		
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			If you see what it's like, you don't when you have a family, you're married, you have kids, you have
bills to pay, now it's more stress. But ultimately, the Euro is more stressed and all of that I
can't tell you what it's like, you know, I can't tell a 16 year old kid that trust me, when you set
your a level exams, these GCSEs are going to seem easy. And I can't see someone doing a levels look
honesty, when you go to your you know, second year, third year of your degree, you're gonna pray to
Allah to bring you back to these 11 exams.
		
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			But they don't understand it because I can't communicate, but I can communicate to them the severity
and the hardship of the actor.
		
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			So a person says, Look, I am worried about my exams, I'm not gonna say you're not gonna worry, these
are natural things that happen. I'm not going to say you're not going to worry, you are going to
worry. But I'm going to say that if you're you, your concern and your worry is guided towards and
attached to the era, the worries you have in this dunya are going to be relatively smaller and
easier to manage. Because you realize that this dunya doesn't really have any value in of itself.
Its value is in earning the ACA. As for the dunya itself, it doesn't have a value in of itself. It's
only benefit and it's only value is earning the actual.
		
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			So a person says, you know, at the end of the day,
		
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			whatever happens to me in this dunya, poverty, sickness, you know, calamities, loss of family and
friends, whatever happens to me in this life, ultimately, everything is going to go back to how it
should be in the afternoon. And I'm going to stand in front of Allah. So I'm going to make my hem
the thing that keeps me awake at night. And the thing that panics me and worries me, I'm not going
to make it my exams. I'm not going to make it my rent, I'm not going to make it my family. I'm not
going to make it my kids I'm gonna make it to Aria.
		
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			Then those other home they're gonna seem to be very small. But if you allow yourself to drown in
anxiety, of all the things in the dunya LEM, you Valley la houfy AG o deity, her Halak, Allah will
not care which Valley you die in. And Allah will not care which one of these Humann will kill you.
Maybe some people will die because of the worry for exams. Some people will die because of worry
over money. Some people will die because of worry over their kids and stress over their kids. Some
people will die over their reputation. Allah does not care which one of these things destroys you.
		
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			If you're not concerned about the ACA, but if you're concerned about the akhirah, Allah will take
care of your dunya Allah will take care of your worries, yes, you will have them everybody has them
you will not escape, as well has an will whom you will not get out of this dip this sadness and
difficulties and worries and stress. What's the evidence? The statement of Allah azza wa jal
Lockhart Hala canal in Santa Fe Cabot? We created mankind in a state of suffering toil, Cabot and
your hard work and suffering. That's your life in this dunya cupboard.
		
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			Whatever money you have, you are not going to get out of a statement of Allah Allah called Carla
canal in Santa Fe Cabot. We created mankind in a state of toil and suffering and hardship.
		
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			So that being the case, you are going to suffer. But ultimately if you're caught
		
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			concern is the era, your suffering in the dunya becomes manageable. Because I want it what are you
going to do to me? Like the magician said to fit around faculty mentor club in America, we had the
hill highlighted dunya. Do whatever you want, you're going to cut our hands, you're going to cut our
legs, cut whatever you want, because the only thing you can do to me is this dunya that's it. You
can't do anything to me in the ACA. So for almost threatening them
		
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			that will suddenly when they're confused or enough, I'm going to crucify you on the date palm trees.
		
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			He was threatening them. I'm going to nail you to the date palm trees. I'm gonna crucify you to the
date palm trees.
		
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			And you're going to know which of us is I shall do other than what other car which one of us is the
worst in punishment and which ones punishment is going to last? But they are thinking look, whatever
you're going to do to me after it's in this dunya you cannot do anything to me the Acura if I
disobey Allah Allah's punishment is forever
		
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			any Allah's Hellfire is forever for those who disbelieve. As for the Muslims, they will not be in
the Hellfire forever, but Allah has Hellfires forever for those who disbelief as for whatever you're
going to do to me for out in this dunya faculty amount intercom, do whatever you can do because
whatever you're going to do to me it is this dunya only.
		
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			It's only dystonia.
		
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			And if a person's hand reaches an extreme level, it might even reach the level of Eliot's despair.
		
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			Like the statement of Allah azza wa jal that he said from Yaqoob when Yaqoob said to his children,
while I take assumere Rohilla in a hula, I assume your Rohilla Halal comb will care for you don't
		
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			don't despair of Allah's relief. Nobody despairs of relief from Allah except for the disbelieving
people. So a Muslim however much you're suffering however much you're going through hardships,
however stressed you are, however confused you are. You should never despair that Allah is going to
bring you relief.
		
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			And from the descriptions that Allah azza wa jal talks about in the realm of what we would today
call mental health is the Posada.
		
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			Your chest being compressed,
		
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			feeling like you can't breathe?
		
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			Like someone is squeezing your chest?
		
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			Allah azza wa jal said Walla Walla codnor Allah more Annette que el de casado can it be Maya Quran?
We certainly know that your chest is squeezed and compressed because of what they say. And Allah
azza wa jal said from a unity level a DIA who Yeshua sada Rahul Islam when you read it and you will
didn't know who Yeah, John Sadara who a year can Hala Janka and nama Yes, sir Adolphe Sana. Cada li
ke Jalla who register Allah leadin Allah, you know,
		
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			whoever Allah wants to guide them, he opens up their chest to Islam. Look at how Islam is described
what is Islam described us, inshallah Harada. Your chest becomes open. Allah national halacha Sadat
didn't we open up your chest? What does it mean? Inshallah Hassan is like you can breathe. It's like
someone took the pressure off you like something very hard, where like a big storm was on your
chest. And then the storm was lifted, and it's like your chest opens up and you can breathe.
		
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			And this dear casado, it's like somebody placing a big heavy rock upon your chest. And you feel the
weight and the burden of your sadness, your anxiety, your worries, your stress, like you can't
breathe like someone is compressing your chest and you can't breathe. Allah says whoever Allah wants
to guide he opens up his chest for Islam. And whoever Allah wants to misguide he makes his chest
tight and compressed,
		
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			as though he was being propelled through the sky. This is powerful. What happens when you're
propelled through the sky?
		
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			Like for example, in a rocket astronaut or a fighter pilot, when they go very, very fast upwards in
the sky, they get what G force right? The force of gravity crushes their body and crushes their
chests. The astronaut who goes in the rocket or the fighter pilot when they drive them, but they fly
the plane upwards. They get extreme extra
		
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			him pressure in the chest. Look at the miracle. This is a miracle of the Quran that Allah describes
this pressure in the time that the Quran was revealed. And the word used is not there is no other
word for it. And then I saw I do. He didn't say
		
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			can never Yes, I do. Yes. I don't mean to climb up like he's climbing up in the sky. Because when
you climb in a plane when you climb up a flight of stairs, you don't feel that pressure. When do you
feel it can nema? Yes, sir, I do feel like you're being propelled at high speed through the heavens.
		
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			That's the feeling of somebody crushing your chest.
		
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			That feeling of crushing your chest, it comes to people. It comes to people sometimes it comes to
people because of misguidance. And other times it comes to people because of sadness. And that's
what Allah is which I said well Akkad Nyla mo annek al De Posada ruka paymaya co wrote, We know
Mohammed that you feel this pressure in your chest because of what these people are saying about
you. They're saying they're calling him names. They're calling him Sharia. Kahin sir, had the
calling him a poet and a magician and a fortune teller.
		
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			They're saying that he's that he's taking this from Al Kitab. And the prophets I some feels like his
chest has been squeezed because of what these people are saying about him.
		
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			What did Allah azza wa jal give us the cure to this? This is important, because when we describe,
		
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			we talk about the sickness. So we must also talk about the cure. So we talked about
		
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			the sickness in the sense that the Prophet size LM felt like his chest was being compressed. What
did Allah give him as the solution to feel better? For Serbia behind the rock beaker welcome Mina
Sergi D was able to rub back a hat, Tia Kelly Akin.
		
00:37:02 --> 00:37:31
			Glorify with the praise of your Lord and be from those people who make such them. Does that not tell
us that by seeing Subhanallah And Alhamdulillah and the ADKAR you can bring relief to your chest?
And does that not tell us by worshipping Allah why Buddha wrote back and continuing to worship
Allah, you can find relief and you find relief through sujood Do you not hear about what the
prophets I said to Bilal
		
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			used to say to Bilal
		
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			to give the other or to give the karma in it to give the Adhan for the prayer, what Bisola give us
relief
		
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			in our prayer, and he make our prayer. A reason for us to feel a Raha to feel relaxed, and to feel
relief. So each of these ayat that I'm mentioning this distress and each of them is giving us an
answer. We heard the DUA Allahumma inni Udo becoming an HMI what hasn't. This too are in itself is
one of the most powerful tools against depression, sadness, grief, anxiety, trauma, worry. So you're
making dua
		
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			you are praying, you're making such them. You're saying Subhan Allah And Alhamdulillah you're doing
your car. You're asking Allah's forgiveness La ilaha illa Anta Subhana Allah in the Quran to me
nobody mean
		
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			and you continue to worship Allah
		
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			until that which is certain ie death comes to you.
		
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			And Allah azza wa jal mentioned
		
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			SF.
		
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			SF. And we mentioned this in the I in surah.
		
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			Use of
		
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			whatever law I'm humo Carla Yeah, so Allah use he turned away from them and he said, Yeah, SFR or
use of sorrow right.
		
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			He said, How I feel such sorrow over us.
		
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			And Allah azza wa jal.
		
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			He mentioned Farah who will come
		
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			what is Farah who is your heart just feels empty.
		
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			And these are feelings people can identify with there's no beauty no description that is more
beautiful than this description. That your heart feels empty. Like it feels like you don't have any
emotions. You feel numb, your heart feels empty.
		
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			Allah azza wa jal said we're us but have to owe me more surface area.
		
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			The heart of the mother of Musa felt empty like it was. It's like an empty heart.
		
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			In candidate lead to buddy be he Lola a robot wanna call be her lead? akuna minal meaning she was
about to inform the people of figure out what she did with Musa if it wasn't that we tied her heart
and he we made her heart strong we tied it made it firm,
		
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			so that she would be from the believers
		
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			the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam we mentioned that he he experienced these feelings in his
life.
		
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			And Allah azza wa jal said, la laka burfi or Neff Secor Allah corner meaning perhaps all Muhammad
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam you would kill yourself out of grief, that these people will not be
believers.
		
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			So even the messengers went through stages of sadness and sorrow. But Allah azza wa jal made them
firm.
		
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			Allah subhanaw taala made them strong. Look, Allah azza wa jal said about the mother of Musa she was
about to tell what happened to Musa but Allah made her heart firm.
		
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			Allah made her heart strong. And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam if it wasn't for the fact
that Allah made him strong, he would have wanted to have killed himself.
		
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			Because these people would not believe.
		
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			But Allah azza wa jal made him strong.
		
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			So seeking strength from Allah, and turning to Allah, and looking at the cures that are mentioned in
the Quran, like the statement of eternal came. This is very, very, very powerful and very important.
		
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			A lot of people, what happens to them is that they actually neglect the Qur'an in dealing with these
issues.
		
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			So what they do is they give a lot of attention to the medical world and I'm taking medication I've
been to the doctor and I go to the psychiatrist and I'm going for counseling, but a lot of time they
neglect and I'm not saying those are bad things, but a lot of time they neglect the Quran. The Quran
mentions depression, grief, trauma, sadness, feelings of suicide, all of these are mentioned in the
Quran and the Quran gives answers to each and every one but like even know him said
		
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			Why am I Kulu are hiding
		
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			you are Hawala you were Falco is to Shiva.
		
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			Not everyone is able to actually look at the Quran and find that solution or able to be able to use
it
		
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			so what are some of the ways the Quran gives us to deal with depression and sadness inshallah we
take about any five more minutes we start to talk about with swass as well.
		
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			The first one Allah azza wa jal gives us knowledge.
		
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			And from this is the statement of Allah subhanaw taala. In nama Escobar fewer herdsmen in Allahu
Allah Momina Allah He may Allah Tala Moon what is it that brought you Yaqoob through his depression
and sadness? Well I am Amina Allah He may Allah Tala moon I know from Allah what you don't know
		
00:43:33 --> 00:43:55
			and Allah azza wa jal said when my yet Tapi la hija I love Omaha Maharaja, whoever has Taqwa of
Allah, Allah will make him a way out. And Taqwa means doing what you can to obey Allah and whatever
you can to avoid disobeying Allah. And if you do that Allah promises you your Allah Who Maharaja
Allah is gonna make for you away out of your problem.
		
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			We talked about remembering the hereafter, and we talked about dua, and from the most powerful of
dua for overcoming issues of the mind and emotions. Is this to Allahumma inni arrows will become in
LM me well hasn't. Well, I just see well, QSL Well, job money well, boehle While dollar a day and he
was all about your region,
		
00:44:24 --> 00:44:48
			or Allah, I asked you to protect me from anxiety and grief, and from helplessness and laziness, and
from cowardice and stinginess. And from being heavily in debt or overpowered by men. Some of the
scholars they said this to our it covers every single thing that could go wrong in someone's life.
		
00:44:50 --> 00:44:59
			Either you're worried about something that hasn't happened, or you're depressed about something
that's already happened, or you are IGS you're incapable of dealing with a problem.
		
00:45:00 --> 00:45:05
			or you are cast Lang and you have a problem you can deal with it but you're not dealing with it
properly.
		
00:45:06 --> 00:45:29
			Or you have cowardice you're too You're not brave enough to tackle an issue or you're stingy and
you're not willing to give what is needed or you have a debt that you cannot pay back. Or you have
someone who is bullying you, or who is causing problems for you and he is all about Hillary John
someone is overpowering you or attacking you or bullying you.
		
00:45:30 --> 00:45:33
			This is every problem that can go on in someone's life is in this to
		
00:45:36 --> 00:46:04
			and from them is the dua Allahumma in the Abduch webinar Abdic Ibnu ametek na CITV Edik Mauldin fear
hockomock I don't fear called UK as ello cabbie coolamon who Alexa Mehta between F six O and delta
houfy keytab IC o r lambda who I had them in Caltech always sticks out to me he fell in love Ibn
deck and tells you a little Khurana Robbie kalbi will neurosurgery, wa Jalla, Hosni Weatherhead a
hammy.
		
00:46:06 --> 00:46:13
			Oh Allah, I am your slave, the son of your slave, the son of your female slave.
		
00:46:14 --> 00:46:16
			My forelock is in your hand,
		
00:46:18 --> 00:46:36
			your command over me is always executed. And your decree for me is always just, I asked you by every
name that is yours, the name you named yourself with or revealed in your book or taught to any one
of your slaves are preserved in the knowledge of the Unseen with you, that you make the Quran the
light of my heart
		
00:46:37 --> 00:47:01
			that you make the Quran, this the life of my heart or the spring of my heart, and you make it the
light of my chest and you make it the reason for my sorrow to go away and you make it the release of
my anxiety. And from this we can take that reading the Quran and reciting it causes a person's
distress and worry to go away.
		
00:47:02 --> 00:47:23
			And also the DUA Allah Humala, Metallica Allah Jew fell outta kidney Elon FC thorofare time was
literally shut and Nicola La ilaha illa. And, Oh Allah, it is your mercy that I hope for so do not
leave me to myself for the blink of an eye. Correct all of my affairs for me there is no God worthy
of worship except you.
		
00:47:25 --> 00:48:02
			And from this the statement has spoon Allah who are near Milwaukee. Allah is enough for us and one
excellent disposal of affairs in the Ibis Radi Allahu Anhu. Now, he said Ibrahim alayhi salam said
it when he was thrown into the fire, and Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said it on the day
when Allah said in the nurse aka Gemma will come fuck show him for Azada home Iman and what Carlo
has put Allah who are near Milwaukee on the day of Allah hazhar When all the Confederates came, the
Prophet Muhammad sighs alimony saw all the armies that had gathered against the Muslims, he said has
spoon Allah who are near Milwaukee
		
00:48:04 --> 00:48:47
			from the means to come back to his patients. The prophets I seldom said I job and the MD movement in
the Umrah who Kula who hired where they said that Kelly had an eel movement. While they said that
Kelly had an elderly movement in Asaba Busara shake up the kind of higher Allah we're in Assam but
will Daraa or Saba Volcana Hi, Ron LA. How amazing is the situation of the believer is situation is
completely good. And this is only for the believer. If he is touched by affliction, his grave if
he's touched by good, he is grateful and this is better for him. And if he's touched by an
affliction, he is patient and this is better for him. Also, this contains what belief in Qatar,
		
00:48:48 --> 00:49:24
			Allah azza wa jal said when they You mean Billa here, the caliber whoever believes in Allah's decree
because you mean biller here means because Rila were my you mean Pierre Cadila and you want me
Yeoman? Billahi yeah to Kalba. Whoever believes in Allah's decree, Allah will settle his heart.
Allah will make his heart satisfied his situation will He'll calm down, his heart will become guided
his heart will become settled if he believes in Allah's decree. Recognizing your blessings, the
Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said on Zorro, ILA men who are SPLM income wala tanzu era men
who have felt welcome.
		
00:49:28 --> 00:49:29
			He said
		
00:49:30 --> 00:49:39
			look at those who are below you and don't look at those who are above you. For it's more likely that
you will not reject the blessings of Allah upon you.
		
00:49:42 --> 00:49:54
			Remember the stories of those who came before the stories of a human his to add the story of use of
the story of Yaqoob and his two are the story of unison his two I let him know salatu salam.
		
00:49:56 --> 00:49:59
			What was the two of you and Nima Sunil
		
00:50:00 --> 00:50:14
			Well enter our hamara he mean, I've been touched by affliction and you are the Most Merciful of
those who show mercy. What was the dua of Jonas La ilaha illa Anta Subhana Allah in the Quran to
Mina volley me
		
00:50:21 --> 00:50:29
			Don't second guess yourself as well doors if only I did this I wouldn't have done that. And if only
I could have done this I wouldn't have done that in the Hadith of the Prophet SAW. I said love.
		
00:50:30 --> 00:50:55
			What in Asada cache on Fela, taco Lo and NIFA al to Cana Kedah, our Kedah. Well I can call cada
Allah whoever Akbar Shah Hassan for in a low tech demo, I'm going to share pan. If you've been
afflicted by something. Don't say that if it was like this, it would have been like that. If only I
could have done this. I would have done that. But say it was Allah has decreed he does what he
wants. For if only opens up the door.
		
00:50:57 --> 00:50:57
			To
		
00:50:59 --> 00:51:00
			the work of the shaper.
		
00:51:03 --> 00:51:16
			Think about the relief of paradise. Think about how it's going to be in paradise. What Claude will
Hamdulillah he led the ad Heather Annelle hasn't. They said Alhamdulillah who made this sadness go
away from us.
		
00:51:18 --> 00:51:19
			And that's why
		
00:51:20 --> 00:51:42
			I remember Mohammed was asked metta Ajay Mata Yeji Abdul Karim Allah. When will a person really get
relief from this world? When will someone really taste what it's like to rest? He said in the
outwardly cardamon Tao Baja Phil Janda. He said when you put your first foot in paradise,
		
00:51:43 --> 00:51:45
			that's when you're going to feel rest.
		
00:51:48 --> 00:51:49
			And don't
		
00:51:51 --> 00:51:57
			and don't let your feelings or your sicknesses stop you from doing good deeds.
		
00:52:04 --> 00:52:13
			Some people when they're afflicted by a calamity, they start falling into haram they start looking
for haram willing to earn haram saying things that are haram.
		
00:52:16 --> 00:52:31
			Instead of person should be patient they should have trust in Allah. They should remain firm upon
Islam. And they should believe that Allah subhanaw taala will make for them a way out and that the
end result will be for the people of Taqwa.
		
00:52:33 --> 00:52:42
			And that what has happened happens because of our sins. So they remain patient. They remember the
Promise of Allah is true. They seek forgiveness for their sins.
		
00:52:44 --> 00:52:55
			And a person praises Allah subhanaw taala in the morning and the evening. They don't get angry. They
don't say bad words about Allah. They don't get frustrated and say why is this happening to me?
		
00:52:57 --> 00:53:11
			seeking Allah's help through patience and prayer and recitation of the Quran, yeah, hallelujah,
administering with slavery or Salah in Allahu wa Sabreen or you who believe seek help from Allah
through patience and prayer. Indeed, Allah is with those who are patient
		
00:53:14 --> 00:53:45
			and a person seeking help through the recitation of the Quran, asking for forgiveness for their
sins, and worshipping Allah azza wa jal consistently. So that deals with an overview Allah it
doesn't have time to even go into specific sicknesses and their issues and how to deal with them.
But we do have a lot of people who are afflicted by what we would call with worse, the whispering of
the shaytaan and Allah azza wa jal tells us about this uncertainness
		
00:53:47 --> 00:54:00
			Pull out of Europe Venus, Maliki nurse Isla hiddenness. Means shadow real worse was ill harness from
the evil of L worse, worse and worse, worse is the one who whispers right.
		
00:54:01 --> 00:54:15
			I'll harness is the one who withdraws any he whispers and then runs away. And levy Wes we Sophie, so
do it in us he doesn't whisper to your ear. Because when someone whispers to your ear, you hear
them.
		
00:54:17 --> 00:54:23
			He whispers into your chest. It's subtle, right? You just you feel the effects of it.
		
00:54:25 --> 00:54:39
			He whispers into the chest. Now I've got a full video on the issue of whispers and how to overcome
it. But I just want to give someone if someone asked me, give me one single thing I can do to remove
the swaths of the shaper.
		
00:54:40 --> 00:55:00
			I'm going to give you just a few simple points. The first is that the greatest I believe benefit in
terms of keeping away from the whispers of the shaytaan is the statement of Allah azza wa jal in the
levena Taco either Messer home pa if Amina shaytani to that kettle for either one more pursuit on it
		
00:55:00 --> 00:55:33
			Indeed those people who are touched by an affliction from the shaytaan a feeling an impulse, anger,
confusion, worry, tell that cow who they remember, what do they remember? Number one, they remember
Allah. And number two, they remember that this is from the shaytaan. So let's say someone says, I've
got a problem of OCD, I'm just washing my hands again and again and again. And um, you know, the
person is in the shower for hours, the person doesn't feel everything is unclean, and so on.
		
00:55:35 --> 00:55:43
			We say, first of all, when you feel this feeling, remember this feeling is coming to you from the
shaytaan.
		
00:55:44 --> 00:56:21
			Don't get me wrong, I'm not talking about being medical or non medical. I'm not talking about being
mess or being a medical issue. I'm saying shaytaan is making it worse, yes or no shaytaan is making
it worse. Shaytan is the one who is fueling it because he wants you to ruin your prayer and you're a
bother. So you spent five hours making Moodle, you miss all of your prayers, and then you maybe
don't even pray after that. shaytaan wants you to do that. So shaytan is making it worse. Remember,
this is from Shaytaan, when you see yourself washing your hands for the 10th time to that capital.
Remember that this is from Shaytaan.
		
00:56:23 --> 00:56:53
			And when you remember it's from Shaytaan, you behave differently because when you think it's from
you, you keep going and you're stressing about it, you're worrying about it, when you remember it
from the shaytaan straight away automatically now you have an advantage. This is this is from the
shapefile This is not from me, this constantly feeling unclean, constantly being in the bathroom,
constantly washing myself not liking the way my room is the feed and everything is not right. This
is from shaper.
		
00:56:54 --> 00:57:30
			So the person reads is not me, this is shaper. And the person remembers Allah that caribou a deco
Allah, they remember ALLAH. So they ask Allah to keep them safe. They Say Subhan Allah Allahu Akbar
are older. bIllahi min ash shaytani Raji La hawla wala Quwata illa biLlah these words caused the
shaytaan to go away. Forever they say I still feel Allah La ilaha illa Allah Subhana Allah
Alhamdulillah La hawla wala Quwata illa biLlah. With these words they're saying are making the
shaytaan go away.
		
00:57:31 --> 00:58:16
			But there is a third thing mentioned in the ayah that people don't really pay attention to. Allah
said in a Latina telco, the people of Taqwa that means that you can't just achieve this by just you
know, disobeying Allah and doing haram and then say, Why am I not getting cured from it, you must
try your best to obey Allah, try your best to make your will do properly, try your best to keep away
from what is haram as much as you can to the best of your ability. And then remember, this is from
shaitan. And remember Allah. And if you do this issue, Allahu taala, you will find relief from this
problem. One more single piece of advice, because I know we're running late. And my single piece of
		
00:58:16 --> 00:58:20
			advice is, if you feel a lot of doubt,
		
00:58:21 --> 00:58:29
			what do we say to most people when they feel doubt about something? We say build upon what is
certain right? Yeah.
		
00:58:32 --> 00:58:32
			We say
		
00:58:35 --> 00:58:36
			the issue of
		
00:58:38 --> 00:58:47
			certainty is not removed by doubt, a clean, reliable check, right? Certainty is not removed by
doubt.
		
00:58:49 --> 00:58:58
			The problem is for someone who's suffering from this worse, they have no certainty in anything they
don't even certain in the one time they wash their hands.
		
00:59:00 --> 00:59:44
			And so they say my, I don't think I've done it and they do it again. I'm still not certain that they
do it again. I still don't think I did it and they do it again. In this case, you need a different
approach. Your approach here should be a lie. You can live Allahu nevsun Illa was Aha. Allah doesn't
burden a person with more than they can bear. So do your will do three the three washes and that's
it. Don't say that I washed it. I don't think I've done it yet clean. I don't have your clean. If
you suffer from extreme which was an OCD like symptoms, do not do it more than the number of times
mentioned in the Sunnah and say Allah you can live Allahu nevsun Illa. Allah doesn't burden a person
		
00:59:44 --> 00:59:55
			with more than they can bear. Allah told me three times I did it three times, call us done. And if
you still feel doubtful, ask someone else to watch. Don't trust your own judgment.
		
00:59:57 --> 00:59:59
			Because sometimes the first thing like the Boyd said,
		
01:00:00 --> 01:00:03
			The first thing that transgressors against you is your judgment.
		
01:00:07 --> 01:00:48
			The first thing that transgressors against you is your judgment. So let someone else look at what
you're doing. Tell them after you look Wallah, I'm having a little bit issues with my widow, just
watch me record or if you see me make a mistake, tell me, the person comes as your water is fine.
Started, go pray, don't say my wudu person is praying, you know, 10 rakaat every prayer, they keep
saying, No, I haven't done it. First of all, only do what is not a burden any live Kalevala who have
said Allah was Aha, you do it your full time and that's it. You're for like an act, that's it. But
if a person still is struggling, have someone pray with you pray in the gym, or pray and let someone
		
01:00:48 --> 01:01:27
			observe you and say to you, if you miss the rock out, they will say to you otherwise, you know that
your Salah is complete. Once you remember it's from the shaytaan and you change your mentality. And
you remember Allah and you try these small things. Slowly but surely the situation does get better
for a lot of people. There are some people who have genuine difficulties beyond that. And most of
those difficulties can be treated with Rukia and prophetic medicine in sha Allah Allah, that is a
topic for a whole nother day. And that is what Allah azza wa jal made easy for me to mention in this
again, I've spoken about these in more detail. I've got a video on Westeros I've got a video on
		
01:01:28 --> 01:01:47
			depression I've got but it's just like a, you know, a few points of benefit and a summary just for
people to kind of remind themselves about and just to Inshallah, think about Bismillah to Allah has
Allahu Allah wa Salatu was Salam ala Nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi H mine, we have q&a
time or not time.
		
01:01:52 --> 01:01:53
			What time is that there?
		
01:01:55 --> 01:01:56
			Is
		
01:01:58 --> 01:01:59
			No Leave it.
		
01:02:13 --> 01:02:21
			For 2425, so we have any 10 minutes.
		
01:02:23 --> 01:02:25
			Okay, 10 minutes for q&a.
		
01:02:26 --> 01:02:34
			Ideally on the topic would be very good. Because I keep on the same live stream. So it would be
good, but it doesn't have to be on the topic.
		
01:02:37 --> 01:02:44
			My question, put your hand up on the mic will come to you. Okay, which is awful luck and
		
01:02:50 --> 01:02:51
			stuff like that.
		
01:02:54 --> 01:02:58
			My question is more for those people who might have someone around them
		
01:03:01 --> 01:03:44
			might be question is about those people who might have someone around them who's suffering from
maybe depression or other mental health problems, maybe a family member, or they might actually be a
medical professional who's dealing with patients with mental health issues. So yeah, my question is,
is there any advice you could share with someone in that situation? So advice for someone who is
dealing with someone at maybe at home a friend, a neighbor, a family member who's suffering from
mental health issues, or someone in a medical context, in reality, the hardest one is the second one
because medical ethics somewhat prevent a person from involving their religion in a person secure,
		
01:03:44 --> 01:04:19
			but I believe the best you can do if you are a doctor, or pharmacist or you know, a nurse or
whatever it is any someone in the medical profession and a Muslim comes to you to ask you for with
regard to these medical issues of course Muslim or non Muslim you give them your best advice in
terms of medical medical advice, medicines or medical treatments or things like that. But if it's a
Muslim and if you're able you know better your profession you know what you're able to say or not to
say but if you're able to say to them
		
01:04:20 --> 01:04:30
			You know, just don't forget even just don't forget about you know your DUA your car, your reading of
the Quran and so on.
		
01:04:31 --> 01:05:00
			Some people you can say to some you can't even Muslims because you know, some people you will come
and say, Look, you know, don't forget about your DUA they'll go straight to the practice manager and
complain you know, like that. I can't believe this guy told me to make dua, I came to him for
tablets, not dua, but if you feel the ability to say, Look, can I give you some advice just between
you and me? Don't forget about your day. Don't forget about your car. Don't forget about making
Toba. Don't forget about reading the Quran, but it's very hard in a medic
		
01:05:00 --> 01:05:08
			Goal Setting because medical ethics somewhat prevent you from that having that full discussion with
people. As for
		
01:05:09 --> 01:05:48
			the situation of someone supporting someone, this is easier because now you have the ability to
actually advise them and bring them to what is best. And one of the beautiful things is Islam
doesn't prevent a medical intervention like Islam doesn't say you can't take tablets, you can't go
to the doctor, you can't see a psychiatrist. But Islam tells you that look, don't ignore the fact
that Allah has given you a whole set of tools that are outside of conventional medicine. And how
amazing is that? That I don't just have to take tablets? How many people are complaining what I take
these tablets, I have side effects I've it's horrible. For me, it's a nightmare. I don't I wish I
		
01:05:48 --> 01:06:28
			could get off it. We don't say stop taking them. We say why don't you start treating yourself with
the Quran, and the car and the DA and then see with your doctor if it's possible to reduce or even
eliminate the use of your tablets over time. And Wallah. I've tried this personally with many, many
patients walleye many a number. I can't even bring you the number of people that were taking various
medications and things. And they were not happy. It wasn't like they were taking them. They said I'm
happy. I'm side effects I'm suffering I wish I don't have to take. So okay, why don't we do this, I
can't tell you to stop them. Because they could be dangerous if you stop them. But I can just advise
		
01:06:28 --> 01:07:05
			you some Islamic treatments. And then with your doctor, you can work on reducing the medicine or
even getting rid of it complete. And maybe you can try and we give him all the solutions and the
different issues and DUA and ADKAR, and Rukia and prophetic medicine and you know all of these
different things Toba and the person is doing Hamdulillah, you see the person slowly, surely getting
off the medication to the point they might stop the medication completely. They might even stop
medication, their doctor told them you can never in your life, you're never going to get off it. And
they stop it completely. We have people with things like bipolar things with things like you know,
		
01:07:05 --> 01:07:32
			schizophrenia, severe depression, all different kinds of issues, who actually come off of their
medication or reduce it down to a much lower level just by supporting their treatment through Rokia
and DHA, and so on. And that's amazing. So I would say encourage them and show them that look, you
know, you're panicking over all these different different things, but actually Subhanallah there's
some treatments you could do that have no side effects.
		
01:07:33 --> 01:08:09
			Just try these few things. And just give them hope and Allah, Allah will cure you, Allah subhanaw
taala is going to make a way out for you. It's easy for you Don't worry, Inshallah, we're going to
do it together. So support them by guiding them in doing those things. Sometimes, for example, a
person knows they should do Rokia. But they don't do it. Why? Because they struggling to find the
time how to organize it how to, you know, how do I do it. So sometimes they just need someone to
kind of be like a mentor for them or like a buddy for them. Like, okay, come on to rocky time, now
we do an hour, we see how you feel, and so on. And we've also tried that, you know, I've tried that
		
01:08:09 --> 01:08:47
			with some brothers, I've been like, you know, a companion for them. And sometimes just about being
there for someone, you should never ever, you know, all of the thing about treatments, but you
should never discount from the concept of just being around for someone. You know, subhanAllah we
have people a lot of people come to my masjid, who really do have really quite difficult mental
health issues and the brothers struggling with different problems. And you know, different issues
they're going through and some of them are diagnosed with quite severe illnesses that they are that
they have. Wala sometimes, you know, all the brother knees just good friends, people to be around
		
01:08:47 --> 01:09:22
			and say, Look, come on, we take you to the hospital or the doctor will help you with your medication
or we'll you know, give you some hope or we just be around you just have personal server and just a
good companion around you someone to just make you smile. And you know, and sometimes people feel
especially with mental health issues, they feel very stigmatized. And they feel like people are
looking at them. They feel like people are making fun of them. They feel like people look down on
them because maybe their interactions are not as polished as some people like the way they might
deal with you or they may they won't talk or they might say things that are out of turn. So they
		
01:09:22 --> 01:09:59
			feel very stigmatized. They feel very scared to come into the Masjid. What if the brothers say about
me something or what if, you know some brothers have side effects from their medication? And they're
frightened of what people will think so just providing a safe space for people to come into the
masjid don't worry about it. We're here for you in sha Allah we all your brothers we know you got
some some difficulties right now. It doesn't matter don't even think about it. That in itself can go
such a long way. Paula houfy O'Neill out Makana atrophy only Allah will be with a person as much as
they are. They help their brother Allah will help them as much as they help their brother
		
01:10:00 --> 01:10:19
			And Allah azza wa jal knows best there are many things but just any points Shall we do the exam then
after the exam we have How long until July 14 So yeah we can do the other and then inshallah what we
can do is we can continue with the q&a So let's have our Watson
		
01:10:31 --> 01:10:36
			was working on work
		
01:10:38 --> 01:10:38
			loves
		
01:10:39 --> 01:10:46
			a long walk about a long walk about
		
01:10:49 --> 01:10:50
			a shed one
		
01:10:53 --> 01:10:55
			long long
		
01:11:14 --> 01:11:15
			I tried the one
		
01:11:17 --> 01:11:24
			mother was oh no all
		
01:11:27 --> 01:11:28
			I tried one my
		
01:11:29 --> 01:11:30
			mother was
		
01:11:32 --> 01:11:35
			on
		
01:12:03 --> 01:12:03
			Hey
		
01:12:07 --> 01:12:08
			ah
		
01:12:25 --> 01:12:33
			long work or
		
01:12:42 --> 01:12:47
			long all
		
01:12:57 --> 01:12:58
			just as a side benefit
		
01:13:01 --> 01:13:09
			there's a hadith narrated by Rouhani and Muslim just to show you like the like some of the things
that Islam provides to somebody that maybe people never thought of before.
		
01:13:10 --> 01:13:15
			The Prophet SAW Selim talked about a tel Vina tell Bina is
		
01:13:17 --> 01:13:26
			it's by Bali it's like a barley flour or something like that. I find the name of it one second, so I
don't get it wrong. Is this called karabiner everyone knows it by the name Kobina.
		
01:13:28 --> 01:13:29
			But it's called
		
01:13:30 --> 01:13:38
			barley flour. Yeah, it's a barley flour porridge. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said about
it. He said at 10 vina.
		
01:13:40 --> 01:13:44
			He said a Tobin MoodGYM Metwally for adding Maria.
		
01:13:47 --> 01:13:49
			Ted the hub will be valid.
		
01:13:50 --> 01:14:14
			He said Tell Bina gives comfort to the aggrieved heart and it lessens grief. Any it takes away
sadness from a person. So it comforts a heart of a sick person. And it makes certain sadnesses and
grief go away. It's just one example of prophetic medicine where one example of things that people
don't realize what Islam
		
01:14:16 --> 01:14:34
			can give you and we know the Prophet sighs LM he said to Dell, well, today will be haram I'll come
back I'll seek a cure or a medicine but don't use the medicine which is haram. Why do I mention
that? Because I saw a lot of people sometimes for example, let's just say someone goes to a
counselor,
		
01:14:35 --> 01:14:43
			counselor or psychiatrist but but often not so much a psychiatrist will often a counselor and the
counselor tells them to do something haram.
		
01:14:45 --> 01:14:59
			This happens I know people right now who are going through counseling for various different issues,
mental health issues. And those people they're counseling they're going through their counselor
regular tell regularly tells them to do things that are haram
		
01:15:01 --> 01:15:37
			Not like as in accord do haram, you know, do as much harm, but they tell something as a solution
that is haram. For example, the guy says, Look, I'm feeling really lonely and it's a trigger for me,
you know, I get worse and I start having anxiety because of the loneliness. You should go out and
meet a girl, you know, you should have a relationship, get yourself a girlfriend. So the counselor
doesn't know because the counselor might not even be Muslim or might not be a practicing Muslim, so
they don't have the ability to tell you what is right and wrong. So be careful that whatever
information you're given, you don't follow something that is haram. And this is something I've
		
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			experienced recently I've been working. Recently, a couple of times I've been to hospitals.
		
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			One time a consultant psychiatrist invited me to a hospital for opiate for a patient, the family
requested it. And I've been dealing with a case recently where I've been going accompanying someone
to go into hospital through these various sort of like the mental health side of things. And I found
this issue that is true that people sometimes the doctor or the counselor will tell you to do
something that's not allowed in Islam so be careful about that also, based upon the Hadith take a
medicine but don't take a medicine that is haram.
		
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			Tying any more questions we had
		
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			my salon for like,
		
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			what advice would you give in terms of what the what the religion says about physical fitness and
its role in the life of Muslim how we should look after that?
		
01:16:34 --> 01:17:18
			You know, I'm smiling, because I'm thinking of the statement of Allah azza wa jal yah yah Halina ama
no limit Hakuna Matata, how am I going to answer this question? Without being a hypocrite, Wallah,
he I advise myself the only thing I can say it's not see her lean FC word for me and for you, that
will Allah He we have to take care of our physical health. And I'm not even just going to say
physical health as a preventative issue. But Wallahi even as a means of seeking a cure from Allah.
From among the best thing is that I work regularly with people who have all different kinds of
mental health issues, like severe conditions and my less severe conditions, and I don't know any of
		
01:17:18 --> 01:17:23
			them. That doesn't improve by going outside and exercising.
		
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			And I'm talking about the whole range of mental health conditions, almost every single person I know
and I deal with a lot, any I deal with a lot and a lot of them all of them virtually, I can't
remember one single one that doesn't improve with going outside and physical exercise. So Allah He,
it's honestly it's something that Allah made it like a sunnah of or may Allah made it a nature of
human beings, that just to go outside, to get some fresh air, to get yourself out and to exhaust
yourself physically, it does so much for your mental health. It does so much for it and preventative
issues, no doubt, you know, Wallahi when you are not eating well, when you're not exercising, when
		
01:18:14 --> 01:18:45
			you are not keeping yourself healthy. There is no doubt that this leads to depression and sadness
and you know, all kinds of issues. It leads to anxiety over your image your body image, you know,
like constantly feeling fat and feeling like you're not healthy and you know worrying about how
people look at you and it leads to anxiety it is all kinds of problems. Even though Rajib said
something amazing Rahim Allah Allah, he said if you see a man with a stomach, you should consider
like this man has a disability.
		
01:18:47 --> 01:19:27
			And this person should be considered to be like they have like a problem with them. And will lie
it's it's so true Allah and there's nothing I have for myself. Why am I Oberon FC? I'm not saying
I'm innocent. But no see, I for myself honestly, that this issue of health is a big thing. I'm not
saying about people naturally. Yes, some people find it easy to lose weight. Some people find it
hard. But just looking after your health as best you can. Try and get outdoors a little bit trying
to get some fresh air trying to get a bit of sunlight. Trying to get eat a little bit healthy. When
you fill your stomach up. Right to the top who feels after that who feels good. Find the single
		
01:19:27 --> 01:19:42
			person who feels good when they fill their stomach to the top nobody. You feel good while you're
eating it. But once you feel your stomach, every single person you feel horrible, you feel lazy, you
feel down you feel full, you feel fat, all that stuff.
		
01:19:43 --> 01:19:52
			Falls and I'll say to myself, we really need to take care of our health. We need to take care of our
diet and we need to take care of
		
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			Jani our any physical well being because this body is a newcomer from Allah. Don't wait
		
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			Is this Nima from Allah subhanaw taala. But I'm worried Danny, I don't want to say to you that I'm
good at this. I have good times and bad times. That's why you see me on the video. Sometimes I'm
like, this big. Sometimes I like this week, because I have good days and bad days when it comes to
this as we all do. But Wallahi and I'll say hi to myself and say hi to all of you, is that look
after your health, look after your diet. And don't ever look down upon the value of just even taking
a walk outside in fresh air Wallahi especially among the young kids, a lot of what they want to
spend their time with his haram Right. Like for example, they want to spend the time watching holla
		
01:20:40 --> 01:21:21
			might have video games and phones and all that stuff. Just wasting time will lie just go out and
spend some time in you know, in nature. And Wallah he Subhanallah you barely Subhanallah maybe you
don't even see something haram in the whole time. And if you go out into the middle of somewhere
where people don't go the middle of you know, for example, a park or the middle of any we go
sometimes out into the ocean on a boat or we go you know, to like some place where like a part of
the beach where nobody goes like or you go hiking in the hills, you might not even see another
person. But Wallah, you've come back feeling so good. And much better for yourself. So don't I mean,
		
01:21:21 --> 01:21:39
			everything is in moderation. But don't neglect the benefit of looking after your health. And that's
anoxia to myself, so nobody says yeah, Muhammad Tim, this is the Falcon family. This is your
hypocrisy coming out here. We say this and I'll say hi to myself, and honestly, to all of you. Now.
		
01:21:41 --> 01:21:47
			We have one time time for one more Well, I would say five more questions but the way I answer
questions we have time for one more question.
		
01:21:49 --> 01:21:49
			salam ala
		
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			would you advise on solid?
		
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			Could you explain to me what the if you if you know the answer, what the cause of it is, from a
personal experience
		
01:22:04 --> 01:22:08
			affect us from society that pressured me to get married? She's going
		
01:22:10 --> 01:22:26
			to say oh, you can get set on you get older? No doubt. That's a very good question. So someone who
has a doubt about getting married and the cause of their doubt is maybe other people's experience.
You know, that's why he will allow when people talk about marriage IGB
		
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			people how they live in their married life is different but when they twin the brothers get together
and talk about marriage
		
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			and it's it is our job and our job and like you will be so amazed
		
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			some will give you the worst possible scenario yeah he Wallah here have enough sick be merciful on
yourself what do not get married What are you doing this? And you know some of the brothers who are
married and they're looking at the brothers who are not married and they're like, yeah, he I feel in
a good jealousy about you I wish for the day and then the other brother is they will tell you like
marriage is nothing bad ever happens. Like he will tell you like you're married to from the homeland
or there's your marriage or your you need to get my unreality is that neither of them is really
helping you.
		
01:23:18 --> 01:23:38
			There are two things you need to think about. The first thing is the prophets. I seldom said Yeah,
Mashallah. Chabad ministers are Amin Kamal Berta affiliate as a witch, or group of young men,
whoever of you is financially able to get married. So that's the advice of the prophets I some I
don't need the brothers experience or the good or the bad prophets, i Some said to get married, get
married. That's the end of it.
		
01:23:40 --> 01:24:20
			He also told you if you can't get married for either, you could be some. So now you have to fast. So
this issue of getting married the second thing you need to remember is the purposes of getting
married. From among the purposes of getting married, is to preserve a person's chastity and for a
person to keep away from the haram. So a young guy who finds himself falling into the Haram needs to
get married, it's not an option about what might happen or not happen and will it be good? Or will
What about my father had a bad experience or my uncle had a bad experience? And if you're falling
into haram, Malaya, timbul Awaji will be here for you. Whatever you cannot fulfill an obligation
		
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			with except by doing it is an obligation, therefore you have to get married.
		
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			But now the question is, how do you avoid the pitfalls and maximize the benefits and this is by
seeking knowledge of Islam properly. And by applying it in your search for marriage?
		
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			seeking knowledge properly. So for example, how to choose a good spouse. What is the qualities of a
good spouse? Because walleye lake you speak to people all you hear all kinds of advice when the
brothers get together, you should marry a woman from this country. They should marry one like this,
or you need to marry a woman like this
		
01:25:00 --> 01:25:18
			You should marry someone or they should marry someone younger should marry some of the same or
everything you hear every single piece of advice and most of it while I talk formally Sara can be
here to follow what you don't have knowledge of get knowledge of what the prophet size some said who
to marry the characteristics you should be looking for.
		
01:25:19 --> 01:25:58
			And implement that. Some brothers and sisters but some brothers I'm not talking about the brothers
because I don't know what the sisters talk about when they talk about marriage. But the brothers
what they talk about they put a condition upon the sister this condition you can only find it in the
photo a about beauty about this about this about her life she's never been out of the house and
she's never seen another man and she's never and she's the most you know what she's the most
beautiful woman on the whole earth. And and and and she's the same nationality my parents want and
and and they put short Jonnie, maybe nobody exists with this description.
		
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			So they should instead look at what's important in Islam, the deen the character, her nature, is she
caring and loving? They look at these issues. And then they look at Jamal beauty because beauty is
not a taboo in Islam. It has, it is important. But ultimately they put things in priority. And they
look at compatibility. Because how many times they look at one thing, they look at beauty, and what
do they find? They find she's the most beautiful woman in the world until she opens her mouth.
		
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			And then Allah homestyles is like he doesn't even want to know her. Because the character is not
there. The personality is not there. There's no compatibility between them. For this is important a
person looks at the deen looks at character. Yes, they look at beauty in the sense they will be
satisfied with a person and they look at compatibility. And the evidence for this is the statement
of Allah azza wa jal women area T and Hala kala come in and fusi come as well gently test Kuno la
		
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			that Allah has created for you, spouses, so that you may live together in a way that is tranquil.
And here Tescan means a second Maha was Sakeena.
		
01:27:17 --> 01:27:57
			Ma, it means that you live with her and you find tranquility with her. And that can only happen with
compatibility. So someone is looking at beauty looking at family, but he's not looking is this does
this girl match my compatibility and what I want from life? What my plans are? What I like to do in
my spare time do we match doesn't have to be identical. But does it go together? Or is it the case
that you want to travel the world and she doesn't want to leave her home city and you want to have a
football team have kids and she doesn't want to have any and so on and so forth. So this is going to
create problems in the marriage. Rather I believe someone who follows the Quran and the Sunnah in
		
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			looking for a spouse and someone who really learns how to do it and really follows it properly. I
don't believe that person will have any major issues in their marriage be it nila heeta Allah
		
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			but more than that, you can't survive without getting married and you cannot keep away from haram
and you can't expand even more so in this time, you cannot keep away from haram so a person has to
look at the right time and the right situation. As for the issue of money I actually think the issue
of money is
		
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			it has a role to play but it's not as big as people say it is like some people are like if you don't
have your own house and you don't have your own you know like your own business and you don't have
you know this much money in the bank account. I to be honest, any a woman who wants this from you
		
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			dare I say that she might not be worth it. So she might not be any she you know, the end of the day
like you see these people they give him $150,000 They give him a hug the first time he argues with
you it's like smashing your forearm into a brick wall. Yeah, he's like I just spent $50,000 on this
woman. And now she's arguing with me. If you make the math easy, make life easy make marriage easy.
So this means that he will not get angry with Jane she will not get angry with him be in the light.
Anna, did you have a tally from the sister site?
		
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			You had a question or
		
01:29:21 --> 01:29:31
			one minute to go. In that case inshallah that's what Allah azza wa jal made easy for me to mention
Allah knows best. Wa Salatu was Salam ala Nabina Muhammad wa ala early he or Sufi edge marine