Suzy Ismail – #45 AlMujib

Salam Alikum, it's nice to see you again as we continue to bring the

divine into the daily by understanding how we can

incorporate the 99 names of Allah subhanaw taala. And the

characteristics of those names into our daily lives to improve

the relationship with our spouse and with our children. The name

that we're going to talk about today was M Wuji. Which means the

one who answers or the one who gives response. Now, oftentimes

when we are reciting the 99, names of Allah subhanaw taala, we think

of Allah subhanaw taala as Mooji but the however, the one who

answers are the one who hears us and responds in ways that we may

sometimes never even imagine. Now, how do we incorporate that sense

of being one who answers and having that type of a

relationship, knowing that when there is a request, it will be

answered in the best way possible with our own families? When we

think about our children, many times they are filled with

requests, you know, at a younger age, the requests may range

anywhere from the Monday and you know, Mom, can I have candy? Dad?

Can I have a skateboard to the absolute observed? You know, Mom,

can I have a lion as a pet? Dad? Can I have a million dollars, you

know, and the requests can often come in one after the other after

the other. As children grow up to be teenagers, and those preteen in

those tween years as well and young adults, we see that sense of

entitlement sometimes continuing and carrying over to consistent

asking, and an expectation of a response. That is a yes. But the

reality is that in each stage of therapy with our children, there

is a way that we need to approach those requests, and a way to

approach how we answer and how our agenda or how our response will

affect their therapy and their development. So for example, when

we have a teenager or a tween, who is asking consistently for an

iphone four, an iPad for an X Box for a PlayStation four devices of

technology that we seem to see, to be the most requested this often

nowadays, from the teenagers and middle school, high schoolers and

even into college. What happens when we consistently say yes, yes,

yes. And what happens when we consistently say, no, no, no, both

extremes are extremes that can send our children into the wrong

direction. We want to ensure that our responses to our children are

balanced, that there is a sense of moderation in everything that we

do. So when our child requests, something that is observed, or

that we know is not beneficial for them. This is where we have to

recognize and realize that there are boundaries and that our

children need those boundaries. And sometimes depending on the

stage of Serbia, the boundary may not be something they understand.

But it does have to be something that they accept. But within those

boundaries again, there needs to be that sense of moderation. So if

we're raising our children where everything they asked for is haram

haram haram, then we're going to raise them to fear the deen or to

feel that there are so many restrictions. But if we are

raising them with alternatives and possibilities, and an explanation

that there is so much more halal and haram in our deen, then we

grow a sense of love and respect within the hearts of our children

for the deen.

How do we know what to answer? How do we know how to respond? It

begins with listening. It begins with others Understanding Our

Children from a young age when they enter our cars after school

pickup. And they're bubbling with words and things that they want to

share. This is the point where we need to listen and answer

accordingly. And as they get older, and maybe they're a little

bit more reticent, they're not as easily willing to share, we need

to learn what to ask in order to get the right answers from them.

And as they continue to grow. This is where we shift the focus to

rather than us being the consistent disciplinarian, to

opening the door to allowing our children to make the right choices

with our guidance to make the choices that we have hopefully

taught them throughout the process. And in this way, we

become the parent who is able to give the correct answer to give

the correct response. And I pray that Allah subhanaw taala and

would you allows us to be apt to have that confidence in terms of

our parenting, to have that ability to have that knowledge and

to have that connection to him in sha Allah in our responses in

giving our own Asia back to our children as we raise them to be

hopefully the best version of themselves that they can be

because I come a little late and I look

forward to speaking to you again as we continue to bring the divine

into the deli or Santa Monica