Sulaiman Moola – Parenting – Developing A Generation Of Excellence – Drug Awareness Q&A
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Respected Ulamah,
Mufti Surayman, Mullasab, Damad Barakatuhum,
members of the community,
fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters,
students,
and beloved youth,
Assalamu Alaikum Warahmatullahi
wabarakatuh.
Firstly, we begin by praising Allah Subarika Wa
Ta'ala.
Sending salawat and durood upon the seal of
prophets.
Muhammadur Rasool Allah, Hissalallahu
Alaihi Wasallam.
Indeed Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala is most kind
on us
that Allah has favored us together
this evening
to engage
in a very very important discussion and discourse
that will be delivered by honorable guest Hazrat
Mullana Suleiman Mullassa.
In the same breath I would like to
say
to 1 and all.
Also to the listeners of Radio Islam International
and the listeners of CII Radio.
To begin the proceedings this evening
and to bring upon us
the mercy of Allah Tabarakahu Ta'ala.
We would commence with the recitation of the
Quran Sharif
and I would like to call upon
who everyone known know as
Prince and there is our none other
than Kari Naim Chonarasab
to join me on stage to render the
opening kirafali at the Fad al Mashkura.
So in on that note,
I would like to also make mention
that inshallah today's program is going to be
formal and informal.
Formal
in a that Hazrat Mufti Saab will be
presenting from the front which will be on
the topic itself
and informal when we get to the q
and a session insha Allah. Without further ado,
insha Allah we will request our Hazrat Tari
Naim Saab to render fast the opening prayer.
Say Mashallah to Karinaim for that most beautiful
rendition.
May Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala accept and take
us from strength to strength.
In the eye of the Qari sub rendered
wherein Allah
says,
Yeah.
How beautiful it is. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
addresses us as believers
as reciters of Allah
So it starts off from ourselves and today's
topic inshallah
is based on parenting, based on the Quran
and sun of Rasool Allah sallallahu alaihi wasallam
and also developing a generation of excellence
because we find
this lethargy that is setting in
within our students, this lethargy that's setting in
within parents
and maybe or probably we're becoming a little
too complacent on the way things are running
and as a result,
the vices are also increasing within our community
as Roshni,
the surrounding areas and many of these challenges
are actually even global. So Hazza Mufti Sahib
will be elaborating
on these aspects as well.
Of recent as well, as we know, like
I mentioned not specific to Roshni but in
general and as Olehmar, we normally deal with
these cases on a on a day to
day basis
amidst
from substance abuse
to,
disobedient
children
to, lack of desire to learn from our
children as well which exist whilst we do
have the other positive side to it where
learners and students do have the drive. We
also have the flip side and like I
said, that could be setting in because of
complacency.
So we do have that and then also
other vices that are coming up like we
know the LGBTQ
and its entire drive and movement internationally, globally.
The the the the issue of * is
also something that is coming to the fore.
So these are serious concerns
that, that are coming to the fore and
vices that are creeping
well into our communities
and this is why we have actually arranged
this program here tonight is to address these
issues head on with Hazal Mufti Saab Insha
Allah will elaborate and will guide us on
how to tackle many of these things that
we are facing Insha Allah. So
these are some of the aspects and and
just talking a little bit about developing a
generation of excellence,
everything starts from home. We know very
well that learning starts
when the child is in the womb of
the mother. That's the first institute.
And from there, of course, the child grows
and it's important as the saying goes, it
takes a village to raise a child that
each one of us in society, in community,
as educators, as olema, as parents
that we play our role in the manner
we ought to play it based on the
Quran and sunnah towards the upbringing of our
children so that they are rooted that so
that they are rooted in the Quran and
the sunnah of Rasulullah
salallahu alaihi wasallam. May Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala
protect our children. May Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala
protect our generations
and make such youngsters grow up that would
be leaders in in the Ummah of Rasulullah,
his salallahu alaihi salallahu alaihi.
Yes. Tonight,
we are very very honored as a community
of Roshni and for this program to be
taking place here
that we have
the likes of Hazrat, Molina Suleiman, Mullasab, Damod
Barakatuhum
that due to his busy schedule as well
has taken out the time to be here
with us to tackle these issues that we
are raising head on Insha Allah. And like
this, like I mentioned we're going to extend
it a little bit further where we're gonna
have the q and a session that's gonna
be happening as well. And Insha'Allah, we'll talk
about that when we get to that point
of the program. So without any further ado,
I would like to call upon Hazrat Mufti
Surayman Mulla Saab to the stage to address
us InshaAllah. Falaatifadir mashhoorah.
Yeah. This thing mustn't be flimsy.
Expressing
the deceptive nature of battle.
And
says that the
used to prefer
reciting these couplets at the time of because
battle and in its deception has a sense
of similarity. Now can you
has a sense of similarity.
Now can you imagine the relevance of these
couplets today when the is gripped with both
a battle and fitna.
So,
the great poet
had initially,
composed these couplets
sketching out the deceptive nature of battle.
In essence, he says,
when battle starts, likewise,
it looks attractive and he likens it to
a young, beautiful, attractive girl.
How often do you youth say this is
trending? This is new. Try this. Explore this.
Browse on this here. Sign up for this
here. There's an element of excitement. It intrigues
you. It attracts you. Sometimes innocence.
Sometimes curiosity,
sometimes adventure.
Battle in its inception
presents like a young beautiful girl. Fitna in
its inception
presents like someone beautiful and attraction attractive.
Every naive, foolish, vulnerable person is just drawn
in.
But as you get close and the heat
becomes intense and the flame starts blazing, you
realize this is far from beauty and far
from young.
It be you realize it's someone old, aged,
frail, senile,
with no companion, no partnership, no loyalty.
And the very thing to which you were
going head on, now you're trying to come
out but unfortunately, you've been overwhelmed, you've been
gripped, and you simply cannot come out of
it.
There's a man who unfortunately has succumb to
substance abuse,
and I try and keep contact with him.
And as the time progresses and inshallah, hopefully,
I've been given a list to speak on
so many things. So I hope I can
encapsulate it in my address.
Every time I meet him,
I ask him, is there one advice that
you can give the people? You've now ended
up on the streets, unfortunately.
And obviously, you don't like the life that
you are living and neither would your family
like to see you, but the brutal truth
is you are on the streets.
Is there one single piece of advice
that you can give to anyone out there,
young, adolescent,
vulnerable, susceptible,
still exploring the earth, finding his wings,
trying to, you know,
enjoy life.
He says tell them to deny and decline
the first temptation.
That's it.
Once you have a choice
for the first time. After that, it's an
addiction.
After that, it's just free falling. May Allah
protect us.
So that's the nature of fitna and that's
the nature of battle. And the prophet
said before,
there will be types of fitanas that will
grip you.
That it would
veil your sanity.
It would block your logic. It will obscure
your vision.
You would just be, you know what,
drawn into it. It probably pops up on
your screen
and, casually, you just browse in through it,
and you just move into that site. And,
unfortunately, you are addicted.
Yesterday, I had a call from a sister,
a message that had come through that, unfortunately,
repeatedly,
she happened to get exposure to the
device of her husband. And, unfortunately, there's been
a * addiction that has persisted from the
inception of the marriage.
And unfortunately, typically, commonly, averagely, you start lying
and one lie leads to another lie.
As the Arabic proverb says, no liar is
good enough to remember his lies.
No liar has a good enough memory to
remember his lies. No. No. It's not my
phone. Somebody else took it. I'm not sure
who did it. And one thing to another.
When we look at the teachings of Islam,
this just as a preamble to my talk,
then every one of us
by birth, without exception,
was born with the absolute ability and inclination
towards truth.
Let's be clear on this here.
Every one of us by inception, by birth,
Allah dispatched us onto earth in a manner
that we all were inclining
intrinsically,
inherently towards nobility, purity, and Islam.
As the hadith
says, The Quran says, it's the natural religion
with which Allah
has created us. Imam Muslim makes mention of
the hadith under the chapter
The qualities which distinguish the occupants of *
from the dwellers of, paradise.
May Allah make us from the people of
paradise and save us from the occupants of
*.
The hadith is in Sahih Muslim. That's the
chain of narration. The prophet
addressing the congregation
and the assembly of the sahaba said that
Allah himself says, and I'm just extracting one
caption of the hadith so that we could
make progress on the other aspects that we
need to discuss.
I created
every servant of mine
with the total
ability to embrace truth.
I often say without fear of contradiction
that amongst the many logical
proofs
to the veracity of Islam
is the perfect synchronization
of the tenets of Islam with the human
anatomy.
So you will find no discrepancy,
no disparity,
no dichotomy
between the human composition
and the injunctions of Islam.
Because the very Allah who created me and
you legislated our deen.
Sometimes you buy a house which is very
amazing, but it's not practical.
Because the man who designed it, designed it
for himself, not for you. So it's awesome.
It has a brilliant view, but it doesn't
suit your interest. You've got an elderly parent.
You need a ramp. You probably have someone
else with a certain challenge. So it's great.
The aesthetics, the decor, the layout, the view,
But it's not tailor made for your interest.
There is no dichotomy
between the human makeup and the laws of
Islam.
Everything is in perfect harmony and synchronization.
And if perchance
you find yourself
frowning or objecting
on any of the aspects of deen, be
it inheritance,
be it the prohibition of drugs, be it
polygamy,
then this is due to external influence
which has obscured
your lenses
and compromised the purity of your vision.
There's external influence
that has blurred.
It's made it foggy.
So now your view is not clear.
To benefit the human race in this world
and the latter.
Furthermore, he writes,
When we say that the sharia has been
designed to benefit the bondsman and the bonds
woman,
then to qualify that statement, it means to
benefit us
as defined by Allah and not as defined
by us.
So father tells his son,
the shop,
this factory, this warehouse, this empire, this is
yours, my son.
So he said, then give it to me.
He says, no. No. It's yours on the
time I decide, with the conditions I decide,
and in the manner I decide.
I will relinquish
at the time I see authority,
responsibility,
maturity, commitment. That's the time. Allah has designed
the laws of Sharia and in its limitations
and restrictions,
there's wholesome freedom.
And in the apparent freedom of others,
there's nothing but destruction.
Or to attract some benefit
or simultaneously
to give you both.
This is a very academic and an intricate
point.
The Sharia by design
does not intend
anything difficult,
complex or cumbersome,
leave alone being colossal or mammoth or daunting
for the humans.
The sharia by design
does not intend
anything difficult or complex for the servant.
Just like
a medical practitioner
or a surgeon
whose
function is to operate, to cut, to take
you into theater.
His aim is not the operation.
His aim is the cure. His aim is
not the bitter medication.
His aim is the treatment.
The Sharia doesn't want to burden you. The
sharia wants to discipline you. Part of the
discipline
process is that, yes, you'll have to sleep
early, you'll have to rise early, you'll have
to donate so much, you'll have to lower
your gaze, you'll have to limit your food,
you'll have to manage your diet. This discipline
is to save you from other harms in
this world.
If you study, I don't want to it's
a whole academic thing that last year I
had the privilege to study. In fact, Imam
Shatibi says for a mufti, one of the
fundamental things is he has to become an
authority on the Maqasid of Sharia.
Understanding the objectives of Sharia before he can
pronounce any judgment.
So primarily,
primarily,
the sharia
focuses on 5 things
which we refer to as.
Five things is the primary focus of the
sharia.
Number 1,
The preservation of religion.
And hence the Sharia says, if your religion
is a threat and someone is opposing you
and denying you, then you need to resist.
Those who were driven out of their homes
because their only crime and offense was they
believed in Allah. Like today, so many sisters,
only offense is that she is dressed modestly
and it becomes,
a sore
sight for many people.
Is loving Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wa sallam,
then I want to be very bold. This
is a crime from which I won't repent.
I'm proud of this offense.
So Islam primarily focuses on 5 things. The
preservation
of religion.
The preservation of religion. Islam recognizes
to coexist
with non muslims
in a common economy, in a common setting,
allowing tolerance,
respect,
mutual cooperation,
mutual existence.
The the the the the Sharia speaks about
4 types of relationships.
Mu'alat,
Mu'asat,
Mudarat,
Mu'amalat.
It's a whole academic
explanation in its great detail form, the different
types of interaction.
Then you have
the preservation of human life.
Human life needs to be sacred. Well, it's
not longer it's not sacred anymore.
It's not sacred anymore, unfortunately.
We have slogans. We have organizations.
We have entities.
But it's it's there's a void. It's empty.
Nothing. How many thousands of people are dying
and you're seeing this here and you're still
debating the term and the definition?
So, hifada to nafs,
that's the second focus of the Sharia. Hence,
Islam legislates
a penalty,
a consequences.
If you claim someone's life, you injure someone,
There's consequences. There's repercussions. You cannot murder. You
cannot kill. You cannot harm. You cannot injure.
You cannot maim someone and just be acquitted.
There's there's consequences.
Then Islam speaks about
The preservation of intellect. So the entire sharia
revolves around these 5 things.
The preservation of human intellect
and hence,
the prohibition of intoxicants.
Because the sharia wants
you to be functional,
sober, and sane at all times. Now, I
don't wanna go into iftar here, but I
need to share something important.
In writes one place,
The difference between
ileat and hikmat.
Ileat is the reason hikmat is the wisdom.
The laws of Islam operate
on its not on its hikmat.
The rules of Islam operate and are based
and revolve around the reasoning
and not the wisdom behind it.
The wisdom
is the intended
benefit
that you would achieve and accomplish when you
practice upon it.
So he gives 2 analogies. 1, let's be
relevant to the context of intoxicants
because that's one of our topics.
And this has plagued every home.
It is just like a guttering fire.
When it hits home,
I've been involved and helping and counseling for
the last 15, 20 years.
I say to my brother and I say
to my sister,
of course we will address our youth to
become conscious, to become responsible
and to understand the consequences of this year.
But at that time,
the moment is too serious
and the situation
is
critical.
We have to rise above
the bigger difference
and the bigger the the the minor bickerings
and differences we have, and we need to
get the patient admitted
ASAP.
I know it's a stigma,
and I know it's a taboo to say
my son has been admitted
or your son is in a facility or
you wanna rather choose to use a more
euphemistic
expression. It's a medical. It's a wellness center.
It's there to give him some form of
relaxation. Whatever it is. I do appreciate it.
We're living in a common society. I have
young kids. You have young kids. But at
the moment, the issue is too serious.
The siren is coming. The ambulance is coming.
The alarm bells
are have been sounded off. The issue is
too important for us to still,
you know, what, limit ourselves to our minor
issues. We have to rise above.
He needs to be admitted right now. We'll
deal with whatever afterwards.
So he gives the analogy
to consume
alcohol is forbidden.
Why?
Because it's an intoxicant.
What is the wisdom of it?
To protect the human intellect
from it being overpowered.
To incapacitate
him. To give him a paralysis.
To create mental
impairment.
That's the wisdom.
But the ruling is not based on the
wisdom.
The ruling is based on the reasoning.
The reasoning is that this is an intoxicant,
hence it is forbidden.
So if somebody counterargues and say, you know
what? I'm a functional addict.
I'm a functional addict.
Yeah.
Nobody who's on the street
believed he would end up on the street.
Nobody whose marriage broke up thought his marriage
will break up.
I know when you came out of the
rehab, you phoned me and you asked me
to convince your your wife,
but I don't have a face to ask
her to give you a chance anymore.
She's exhausted.
She started a life with a good future
or what optimistic of a good future.
So the wisdom is to save the brain
from
from from, you know, deteriorating.
But the ruling
will not operate based on the wisdom.
It goes on the and not on the
hikmat. And then he gives another analogy
just like traffic
lights. The red light is to stop so
that, you know what, the traffic on the
other side could flow to avoid a collision,
to avoid an accident.
So would it be correct then to say
that given the wisdom
of the lights that this one needs to
hold, that one needs to flow. So if
I come here and it's a red light
and there is no traffic flowing,
then there's no wisdom for me to stop
here now because there is no fear of
a collision. Can I continue on a red
light? South Africa as an exception.
Obviously not.
The rule operates on the.
I had a sister recently, why why should
I be in eded?
I can't fall pregnant. There's no there's no
need to verify if I'm pregnant or not.
Yes. That's given as a hikmat. That's not
the rillah. You have to be in riddah
because he divorced you. If he did it
wrongly, that will be his consequences.
But after talaq, the Quran says there's itat
for you. Your husband has passed on, the
Quran said there is itat for you.
So it's important to distinguish between illat and
hikmat.
Because, of course, our youth today think they're
smart, think they're wise. You assume you calculated,
you assume you're functional.
I told you of the young man who
came to me and he said that,
I think cannabis
is permissible.
So I'm like, okay. What's up, bro?
He's like, if it's forbidden, why does Allah
allow it to grow?
I thought you could be smarter than that.
But, anyway, let's say that that's what it
is. So I said to him, so if
the teacher gives you
a questionnaire
and he says choose the correct answer, so
then all the answers are correct.
Or is the fact that choose suggestive of
the fact that one is correct?
You say, hey, you're smart.
So the third thing is
The
deen in its pristine,
original, unadulterated
form has been revealed,
preserved, transmitted
and it focuses on the preservation of the
human intellect. Wow.
SubhanAllah.
Wow. What a rich deen. What a wholesome
religion.
What an amazing
deen.
Flawless. Impeccable.
The fourth thing is
The protection of wealth.
It's valuable.
There's consequences if you steal
these hands.
They were valuable as long as they were
loyal.
But once they betrayed, the shari'a said, no.
No. No. No. These hands don't. They're not
they're not
fulfilling their function.
When Allah spoke about the prophets in the
Quran, then Allah described them in different ways.
But one description Allah gave of them is
they are people with hands and eyes.
There are people with hands and eyes. We'd
hang on. What do we have?
The scholars say they fulfilled
the role of every organ and limb that
Allah had given them.
So
if you have eyes, what would you say?
But you don't have ears, you have potatoes.
Why? Because
you're not listening. It's defeating what it's supposed
to do.
And last, out of the 5, there is
difference of opinion amongst the experts
in terms of the sequence.
Of course, Dean stands first.
And then is the preservation of human body.
Regarding the other three, there's difference of opinion.
What is the sequence in terms of merit?
Islam, out of the 5 preservation, religion is
first.
2nd is the body. And in in the
other three, there's difference of opinion.
The preservation
of progeny.
Establish your lineage.
Confirm your identity.
Hence, the prohibition of adultery and zina. We
need a society where people are responsible,
not unfortunately
irresponsibly
impregnate a woman and off you're gone. There's
no connection. There's no responsibility.
And then, you know, you're you're having a
campaign of of abuse against women and children.
Raise the alarm bells, put an end to
the perpetrator, etcetera.
But then from the roots are you tackling
the problem?
Islam says there's a lineage.
There's a responsibility.
You got to stand tall.
The nestle, the progeny needs to be identified
and recognized.
I
haven't started.
So
just relax yourself.
If,
the only 2 people
that told me I better speak short is
my wife and my daughter. So I'm a
bit under pressure.
Al Asmari,
he was
an authority.
He was a grammarian. He was a philologist
born in the 7th century.
Those that are into Arabic grammar would know.
You heard his name so many times.
In the quest of learning better Arabic,
he said I want to go
to the outline towns,
communities to learn pure language.
I mean today, it's so bad wherever you
go, you just hear vulgar.
Vulgar.
You can barely sit amongst a group of
youth
and not hear you'll be appalled.
Sometimes you're at the airport and you just
turn here and the guy in the queue
is like swearing like a sailor. No. Like
a traveler.
Change the phrase and what's this?
Some people swear
so casually. I'm not condoning it. 1 is
in anger and rage and frustrated.
But one is like, you had a good
time and you swear it.
I don't wanna be mimicking the words here
obviously, but you know what I'm saying.
What? It's just vulgar. Just pure vulgar, obscene
language.
If you're sitting with the group that are
mocking the deen, that are doing wrong, then
move away from there. And if you forgot
you were with them, as soon as you
realize, move away.
And, oh, you just got to be cool.
You got to go with the flow
and it's just vulgar. It's just stupidity. It's
naivety. It's
vulnerability
and that's it. And then you look at
the outside
marketing world. How irresponsible
marketing
is. How many times you exit your house,
there's an urge of sin.
And just at that time, if something comes
up which you know, it's not like you
don't know. Allah is watching.
What a halt. What a break. What an
alert.
And if you come out and say, I'll
just do
it. You are getting a whisper, you're getting
a provocation,
you're getting an incitement,
and then to further,
you know what, compound and augment
that, you get in external messages that are
telling you, go for it.
Go for
it.
I dare you take a bite from the
forbidden fruit.
That's the kind of advertisement.
I dare you take a bite from the
forbidden fruit.
Speaking on the forbidden fruit,
The devil came to our ancestor Adam and
Hawa
And what did the devil say?
The devil said to them,
I promise you
I represent your interests.
That's what the devil said. He sugarcoated
his deception and his delusion
by saying,
I promise you I represent
your interests.
My young boy,
besides Allah and his Nabi and your parents,
Be weary, be watchful, be vigilant
of anyone who's a smokescreener
with that slogan.
I say this and I'll repeat
this. Your parent can
in
the advice he gave you.
But he will never in the motivation of
the advice he gave you.
He is human,
so he is fallible,
so he's short sighted,
but he didn't
mean harm for you. Wallahi
only meant well when he said get married
here, when he said take a job here,
when he said buy your house here, when
he said disassociate with this person. It went
pear shape, it went wayward, it steered off.
Is this not adequate compensation
that you heard or you responded and obliged
to what your parents said? Allah will offset
that harm by giving you divine because
of your compliance to the sentiments of your
parents.
Let me say something.
Allah has blessed me with 3 grandchildren.
May Allah guide our children. May Allah guide
our grandchildren.
I love my parents.
My parents love me.
I love my children. My children love me.
In one word,
if I can tell you what distinguishes
my generation
from my children,
We feared our parents. Our children don't fear
us.
They love us, we love them. They do
for us, we do for them. Do our
children fear us? They don't fear us.
I fear my father. I fear my mother
lovingly,
respectfully.
But you know, that's it. Papa said, Ma
said. Done.
Done.
Our children
don't fear. There's no cut off point.
Listen, hey. Abu said we need to be
home at 10 o'clock.
I
kid you not.
That's a phone call from my kids. And
I I mean well.
Bali, how's it?
Bali, we chilling. We relaxing.
Okay. Where you are? Make sure you in
the right place. Read your to us. Don't
worry.
We feared
and that has changed the entire dynamics.
I come from a generation when I was
married,
my better half will tell me or
confirm it.
29 years ago,
and my those that are my equals and
older than me, when I got married,
there was no house, there was no home.
But there was values how to be economical
and frugal and build a house.
And there were values of tolerance and respect
and how to shape a home.
The generation of today, including my sons and
your children,
are married
and they are given a built house
but they lack the values to make that
house into a home. So it's become a
tall order and a big ask
to ask them from the built house make
a home.
With the passage of time, all of us.
My generation and those beyond me, even all
the more, you saved what they say marriage
is not only about being 5050, it's about
being thrifty, thrifty.
What's the problem? I got too much
month left at the end of my salary.
You didn't get that?
I got too much month left.
It's like, oh, it's only 10th.
Hey. I don't know how to budget. That's
how the youth of today is.
When you got married, when I got married,
the old folks hold the there's nothing.
The old folks will talk of fitters,
and then this is how will but there
was values.
Every time your child does something wrong,
you defend him.
Tomorrow you'll get a lawyer to defend him.
Child discipline is not abuse. It's shaping him
into a good human.
Every time he's in a problem,
you give him deliverance.
You save the moment and you deny him
the lesson of life.
That is why I say to parents,
sometimes they say, oh, he got caught.
I said if he got caught,
my advice to him, don't just pull him
out.
He needs to feel it a bit long.
Let him feel the consequences.
Otherwise, I promise you if you if you
got him admitted, say wait, I got pulled.
I got clout. I got muscle. And you
had him pulled out today.
This boy will become a monster if not
he's already a monster.
When he got caught,
I can't forget the words of this mother
and I said my it's only a mother
that can talk. The son was apprehended, intercepted
due to drugs. The mother is crying one
side, I was there. She said, oh Allah,
jerk my son but don't hurt my son.
Oh,
jerk my son but don't. I said, who
can coin these words? You can't make these
duas.
This is a mother's motherly sentiment screaming out.
There was a youngster we had admitted because
the family contacted
me. Finally, when he got discharged,
I phoned the mother. She made lot of
dua for me. She said, for Allah's sake,
don't bring my son back to my house.
I said, ma, he's your blood. She said,
no. No. I can't deal with 12 o'clock
and knock on the door and a gangster
and a fight and then I can't. I'm
too old for this.
I said, but he's a change. She said,
whatever you say, I don't have strength to
give him hope or chance or belief.
The laws of Sharia are designed in your
interest.
I've said this and I'll say it again.
Sin can make you look happy. Only obedience
will make you feel happy.
Sin will give you a thrill. If sin
doesn't give you a thrill, nobody would buy
into sin. It has it has to have
some offering.
Don't bite at the bait of sin unless
you know the hook that is beneath it.
Don't bite at the bait of sin. It's
just throwing itself out there.
And you just bite on it. You know
my brother,
expensive things are costly on your pocket.
Unhealthy food is costly on your health.
And is expensive on your iman.
Is very expensive.
One affair,
one romance,
one flirtatious
contact,
and you throw your entire marriage down. Gone.
So we're talking about
the mobile phone
And how this has unfortunately
first it was, don't bring the phone to
school. Now the old school is in the
phone.
That's that's how things have evolved. We are
a nation blessed and cursed with our innovation.
I haven't found a more comprehensive
explanation of modern technology than this statement.
We are a nation blessed and cursed by
our innovation.
Some would argue that there are benefits in
sin.
The Quran doesn't deny that.
Some say if you take a tot of
alcohol in moderation, it enhances your IQ. The
Quran is not averse to that. The Quran
says look beyond. Are the benefits more or
the harm more?
You said, you know what? With the lottery,
we've helped so many people. Great.
But have you helped more or made more
people poor?
You've enhanced one person's IQ and the other
people you've destroyed their entire life.
Today today today fresh. Just before Jumayah got
a call,
he was high and he gave 3.
It is what it is. A bullet is
a bullet.
When it shoots out of the barrel, that's
it. It's gonna cause its harm.
The consequences are catastrophic.
So here's an analogy
and,
for parenting, may Allah give me may Allah
grant you the understanding.
Somebody said if I could rewind my life,
I would have less meetings and spend more
time with my kids.
I say to my son, I say to
my daughter-in-law,
you know what?
You wanna keep
your child busy and you wanna keep them
off the phone, it will mean serious adjustments
of your life
to spend quality time with this child.
If you're not ready to make that adjustment,
then then it's not going to happen.
So you're gonna have to come back early
from work.
You're gonna have to compromise on probably going
to your beauty parlor,
going for your manicure, pedicure, whatever it is,
your massage, your weekly this year. And both
of you have to find time with this
little one to keep. This is an inquisitive
mind.
He was a Tabiri.
He was a judge.
He was appointed as a judge during the
period of Sahaba.
His 10 year old son was sent to
Madrasa.
On the way, he got distracted. There were
few youth that were playing and there were
some dogs that were running around, so he
diverted, spent his whole time, then he came
back. This is a Tabiri.
He was appointed as the judge during the
time of Umar. There was no devices, and
this was the distraction
because of which he didn't go to Madrasa.
The next day, Kadeh Suray asked his son,
you went to Madrasa? He said no.
So he wrote a letter,
to to to the teacher.
And,
he said to him,
Arabic poetry.
He neglected
for and abandoned his salah
because of some youth that were just playing
and they were having some fun and some
entertainment.
See, this is what I say. I've got
such an influx of thoughts.
The whisper of sin
was in the human from the inception of
time.
But the access to sin was never so
available like today.
The whisper to sin.
You you you have a crave for something
sweet. Why they say it's difficult to be
a woman? You wanna cry without a reason?
You wanna lose weight and you like to
eat something sweet.
You're sitting at home, you're trying to discipline
yourself.
If the crave of sugar comes and there's
a bar of chocolate or a slab of
chocolate,
you're gonna you're gonna eat that whole thing.
So and if the slab is not there,
it happens often to me. You're traveling in
a hotel room and suddenly you just have
a crave for something,
and now you say phone reception. It's late.
Or, you know what, do an Uber. It's
okay. Leave it. It's 10 minutes of behavior
and the crave is over.
But if the slap is there, the chances
are very slim you're gonna behave.
The whisper comes of sin.
The hand the phone is in your palm.
The excess is too much.
I said to a young man, phoned me
recently, and he said, no. I've done every
wrong. I've been sleeping around. I've been pulling
around. I've been popping things. I've just done
a lot of nonsense, but I'm miserable.
And I said, of course. That's a given.
That's a given.
You show me one person who's living a
life of sin and he's happy.
I will do what Imam Shafi said. I'll
give him half of whatever virtue I have.
I don't have much, but I'll give it
to him. Show me one man
who had an affair, who took a drug,
who did something haram. We're not talking of
halal.
If you're doing halal, that's a separate thing
altogether because Allah has kept wholesome pleasure in
Allah's obedience.
Allah has kept wholesome pleasure in it. There's
no doubt about it. But in haram, if
one person, he got a thrill. He got
a cake. There's no doubt about that. But
the uneasiness, the restlessness, the anxiety,
looking over your shoulder, holding your phone. What's
this? There's no life.
And I'm a say something
because I deal with this so often.
The young generation, they get married and, no,
he's on this app. She's on that app.
He posted here. She posted there. I need
to see this. So I said to them,
see. When you are married,
then of course, Islam has allowed you to
be intimate with your spouse.
And if you're if there's anybody else in
the room, you said, please can you leave?
I need to change.
Right?
Hopefully the same thing happens at the germs.
Because again,
what's this?
Islam The prophet
said don't look at the thigh
of a male or a female, living or
dead.
Our deen is so modest. What did I
say? If you frowning on any aspect,
it's external influence.
Fatima
said to Asma bintu Omayz, I'm so worried
when I pass away. How they going to
cover me? So Asma said, you know what?
We went to Abyssinia.
Asma
was the wife of Jafar
Jafar and Asma had migrated to Abyssinia.
The union, Aun, Muhammad, and Abdullah, Allah blessed
them with 3 children. Then they came back.
Then Jafar
went to Muta. Then he passed away in
Muta.
The amazing couplets of Ka'b e Malik contribute
and homage
to Jafar
So she went to Abyssinia.
Some argue Ethiopia, some say Eritrea.
Geographically.
She said, come I show you Fatima
what I observe there in the in the
land of Africa.
And then she created this canopy.
Regeneration.
She took twigs. She created a cover and
she said this is how they would cover
a female's body there. That's what I observed.
Fatima
was intrigued by this display of modest
day and she said to Ali, this is
what I've heard and this is what I
want you to do.
Bury me by night, cover me like this
and I want you to get married to
my niece, umama, my eldest sister Zainab's daughter.
Three advisers she gave.
Is rife.
Our community and our society
still holds polygamy as an absolute taboo.
I'm not here to advocate anything. I'm saying
we need to be in Allah's obedience.
A life of sin is a life of
deprivation
of. A life of obedience is a life
of.
So we take the phone today.
The Quran speaks of the tale of.
So what happened in the tale of?
He came out with his flamboyance.
He was fleshing his muscle, his economic
muscle that he had.
Displaying it, opulence, flamboyance,
beauty, splendor.
And as he's walking, those that are looking,
they're like, wow.
That's now stunning.
My word.
Right? Thus the Quran says,
Exact verbatim translation.
This man is damn lucky.
This is luck falling in his lap. What
happened?
Listen to me. Follow my pattern of thoughts.
Appreciate my angle of my analogy.
Makes an appearance.
He makes a presence.
People are occupied doing their own things. They're
caught in the spectacle.
It just mesmerizes
them, spellbound,
leaves them all riveted. They're all are, you
know, what? Water dripping from their mouths in
in in envy of this person.
Those who had iman, who were anchored, they
retorted. They challenged the narrative. They said, no,
man. That's fickle, man. That's transitory.
That's temporary. You can't fall for this here.
Just take you know, the guy passes you
zoom with top speed, and then he couldn't
negotiate the bend. And then you see the
body lined and the corpse and the car
burnt out. And then you're like, no, Allah.
This jalopy is good.
Because even if I wanna put up speed,
I can't put up speed.
That's exactly what played out.
You must see what the aluluga write on
the in terms of the grammar of this
word.
Now here's my point of question,
and here I want you to put your
thinking caps on my sisters and my brothers.
These people by default
got exposed
to the presence of karoon
and his economic muscle
which dazzle their eyes momentarily.
Today, the world has been designed such that
every night, every one of us, before retiring
to bed, it's almost compulsory
that we take out our phone and we
start searching for the quroons of the day.
Hey. Where was he today? Where was his
Kharija today? Oh, wow.
I, by design,
sit me as a man, my wife as
the spouse, and my children.
So we all live in a life of
misery, depression,
ungratefulness
Because what's been shown before me, she cooks
nice, he dresses nice, their marriage is happy,
their holidays are awesome, Their location is stunning.
Their everything is great.
Daily, if that's what I'm feeding. You know,
as kids, the Gujrati proverb, what they say?
Join a.
Join a.
You're gonna see. You're gonna feel for it.
You are consciously these people didn't go looking
for
happened to come out. And the Quran is
very beautiful. The Quran is pragmatic.
The Quran says the believers are those, they
don't go to evil places.
But the Quran doesn't say the believers are
those who don't pass evil places because it's
a real world. You have to pass a
casino. You have to pass a club. You
have to pass a pub. You have to
pass a place where there's wrong. So the
Quran doesn't say that the pious are those
who don't pass evil.
Allah says they won't enter it.
They'll never go into the venue because they
know it's not compatible to their faith. And
if they happen to pass by, the Quran
says they pass by with dignity.
The scholars unpack the word dignity by saying,
they lower their gaze, hasten the pace,
despise the offense that is been perpetrated
there and they don't shun the perpetrator.
My word.
My word.
Ours is the direct opposite.
Your profile, your dressing doesn't allow you to
get in. So you're just circling the area.
No. No. There's a lot of traffic here.
Yeah. So but why are you going there?
No. We just you're not there.
So, this is the brutal truth. As long
as I'm sitting on my phone and you
sitting on your phone, you're not gonna be
happy with your partner and your partners are
gonna be happy with you and your children
are not gonna be happy in the home.
It's not gonna happen.
I once heard a radio program
and a woman was talking about the importance
of healthy food.
GMO free, organic, natural,
doesn't have all these,
artificial
flavorants and chemicals in it.
She said, if a child at birth
is told,
eat pure, eat natural, eat wholesome, eat organic,
and you start making impressions on the subconscious
mind of that child.
You start making impressions on the subconscious mind.
Eat good. Eat healthy. Subconscious, right? You you're
making impressions on it. The wiring of the
the child.
Because today I was in Ireland. Okay. I'll
come back to this.
And,
we were having Suhoor and the next day
I had a flight out. So this brother
was saying his daughter is in the US
and she did a whole research on the
negative impact of
of the phone
today on the human race.
Never before
in human history
were the humans
exposed
to such conflicting
information simultaneously.
It took you time to get good news.
That new good news created that electrons
that gave that ecstasy,
that gave that, jubilation, that gave that euphoria,
that translated in that, happiness in the body,
the excitement, whatever it is. After a period
of time, you discovered some sadness. The body
accordingly triggered those reactions and emotions.
But now the human race simultaneously
is being exposed to good and sad news
at one time, which is disturbing the human
anatomy and wiring like it has never done
ever before.
And this is my analogy. Imagine you take
in a laxative and imodium at the same
time.
Imagine you take in a laxative,
you know, now this this you gotta be
very euphemistic. So you mustn't say he's constipated.
You must say, you know what,
he he is,
got limited bowel movements.
So now you're constipated,
you're taking a laxative,
and at the same time you're taking Imodium.
What are you gonna do to your body?
Can you imagine this body just constantly? You
don't need to know everything that's happening all
the time.
And this is something you have to decide
yourself. You have to control it. The world
out there
is a crude world.
Wherever revenue can be generated,
they will make it. That's it. You're not
gonna be able to change it. You've got
to up your immunity to become resilient to
the bacteria.
But end of the day, you know what?
You're gonna inoculate yourself spiritually.
You're gonna inoculate yourself. But if it's making
money there, who cares?
That's the will. It's crude. It's brutal. It's
harsh.
I've said this in that last drug program
that I had. I have an eye for
wildlife,
and I have an eye for safari and
of course, we've been seeing the migration
in the Masai Mara, in Africa, in other
places, and I it kinda intrigues me. And
often when you see nature play out,
in its natural form, in its natural habitat,
and a mom just giving birth to her
calf, and just then, they are predators in
ambush and they pounce on. And of course,
it it just brings a tear in your
eye. It brings a tear in your eye.
A mother in the wild, in the wilderness
alone having to give birth
to and and and and, you know what,
delivered this issue and this child and this
baby and trying to give some shelter and
just then comes the lappet, snatches this newborn
and off it's gone. And then you'll get
the comment that would say, but brutal, but
harsh, but that's nature. No. That's not brutal.
Brutal is a drug merchant who's wicked and
evil,
infamous and nasty, who can sell a pill
to a 10 year old child, knowing this
is going to bring an entire hometown.
Kept him hooked on.
That's brutal. That's inhumane. That's harsh.
I just got to sell it to him
once.
And then in the UK, I travel all
the time. There's balloons.
They just go high and it's out.
Like, how much more merciless can you be?
How do you sleep at night?
So I was saying to you
that,
we expose ourself.
We choose to expose ourself to these fitanas
and daily we get onto these sites
creating this
constant dragon that we're chasing.
So we have the problem. I mean, I
do a marital counseling
and, I don't envy myself and by the
way, I don't have any open slots.
Yeah. Honestly, I don't have any. I I
openly apologize. I can't even answer all my
emails. I can't even reply. I'm just overwhelmed.
It's beyond my capacity. It's just too much.
May Allah bless my family for allowing me
and and and coping with me and and
giving me the space. But it just invades
and, you know what, infringes and encroaches and
and consumes your own life.
So,
today
in in in
marriages,
you find
how many partners
are on antidepressants.
ADHD, better known as ADD,
attention deficit hyperactivity
disorder.
Mental health which has exploded in the last
10 years.
Right? Someone described it like an iceberg.
You see in the top,
the top is anxiety.
The top is irritability.
The top is restlessness.
But the real ice is beneath the water.
Those are the external symptoms manifesting in the
individual.
He or she can't hold a conversation. He
or she can't stand in the queue. He
or she is irritable.
Those are the external factors given, but the
whole ice is beneath.
I cannot tell you the amount of more
commonly
on the side of woman that are on
on on on on pearls at a young
age
And you can't really have a fair,
you know what, balance
dialogue between the couple because there is this
mood swings, there is the bipolar,
there is, you know, split personalities.
We are in in serious times. We are
not in easy times. Don't be
deceived by the optical illusion. It's just all
like smart and good and glory. No. No.
No. No. No. No.
Things are rough and tough. Things are rough
and tough.
I can tell you in 25 years of
counseling if I've come to learn,
nobody's marriage that you think is hunky dory
is hunky dory.
People who you think that, no. No. This
is on the best side of life. No.
No. It's far from that.
It's far from that.
Recently, I spoke at one event
and then there was a joint set in
between a partner. I like to use very
very broad and generic terms because then people,
are you talking about me? No. No. No.
No. No. So I like to use the
most broadest generic context, you know. Or create
hypothetical
scenarios.
So anyway, the husband called out to the
wife and the wife replied via the veil
and everything. So I said to him, hey,
you know what? Besides the presentation that you
people gave and everything, but I think you
gave a lot of example to, you know,
couples to what's a happy marriage.
He said, that's what you think. I said,
oh, there we go.
There we
go.
So only Allah can help us in these
times, but we need to take some active
steps. Here's a reflection from the Quran.
Allah told the mother of Musa
put Musa in the basket, put the basket
in the river Nile.
Right?
Then Allah said,
She was on the verge
of divulging
and said, hey. That's my child.
Though we gave her the assurance your child
is coming back.
We learn from this
that no human
is strong enough
and capable enough
and smart enough and wise enough and intelligent
enough
to wade the deep waters
and navigate the stormy oceans.
Everyone
can only rely on Allah to get you
across.
I say to couples
when unfortunately
there is a discovery that a child is
on drugs, inevitably, it creates
tension in the house. There was one case
I was
overseeing and dealing
and obviously the father going a bit more
on the iron fist. The mother going on
the soft one. My son is soft. He's
like this, giving space. It create a tension
between the parents.
Do we keep him in the house? Do
we keep him out? And I said, see,
my young boy, we're not expelling you. This
is your house.
This is the kind of compromise I had
to make to kind of stabilize the equilibrium.
Equilibrium in the context because it was just
creating so much, imbalance and turbulence.
But for you to stay in the house
with your current addiction,
you disrupt the normality of the entire house.
You disrupt the normality of the entire house.
You walk in at 12 o'clock. You get
up at 12 o'clock.
You don't perform salah. You sleep with earphones.
You got music blasting. You got a 10
year old that is trying to just find
his feet in rhythm, and he's just saying,
but if my brother can do it, why
can't I do it? So you exacerbate
and compound and aggravate the situation.
So it's just not him per se. And
I must also
say that in my own observation
it takes at least 20 members
to save 1 person who has succumb to
drugs.
And I say that conservatively.
And I say that with 20 years of
working with people like this.
If you don't have a network of 20,
it's just a matter of time when everyone
in that group will be burnt out.
No. I'm done now. Listen, I've met your
brother. He's in a bad state.
Please don't phone me again.
Hey. I'm so sorry to see Ben. I
just seen your husband. You know what? He's
not my husband. You I can tell my
children. My children also don't call him a
father anymore. We done. You need 20 members
of society.
Each one rotating,
alternating.
You hang on now. You rescue now. And
just when you've done everything and he's finished
the 3rd day relapse or he's overcome the
3rd day obstacle and 11th day, after 2
months he says, no, I'm having crazy craves.
I'm suicidal or I'm gonna relapse.
Now if you don't have manpower,
it's over.
Lut alaihis salam said,
I wish I had a family around me
that could rally.
How often
there's one son who's moved on. He's stable.
He's anchored. He's prosperous. He's moving with good
speed. Daughter is settled, anchored, moving in a
good home. There's the one, the delinquent,
the black sheep,
the outcast.
The parents are old and aged, and this
one's 3 marriages broke, 4 times in rehab,
son and daughter too busy in their lives,
or whatever. They're too occupied. And you got
these old parents now. Their head has dropped.
Their back is hunched. Their bones are weak,
their body is frail, and they're back and
forth taking this 35 year old to police
station, to the rehab, coming back. If we
as children and society won't intervene,
what zulum aren't we doing to these parents?
The butchers out there, the merchants out there,
the infamous individuals out there, they don't care
any less.
So I was telling you about,
and we digressed into a host of discussions
but I pray that, each one of those
digressions
were meaningful and objective insha'Allah.
Asmahi was a philologist. He was a grammarian.
He went in the search of learning language
and that's where we digressed when we spoke
about vulgar because that's how unfortunately language has
become today. We need to sit with youth.
We need to connect with youth. We need
to take out a lot of time and
create a bond.
When the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam had
adopted Zayd
or good kari name?
Yeah.
We're still trying to reach our cruising altitude.
Yeah. We haven't yet yeah. We're still just
airborne.
Yeah. Now you must tell me to stop.
I'll stop. This is my my heart is
in this year. Wallah, my heart cries for
the youth. My whole life has gone in
this. I ask Allah to accept it. That's
all I can say.
I I seen an episode of a young
man 2 weeks ago. He had an outburst
with his drug. My word. My word. I've
never in my life seen he started banging
his head on the floor,
like, aggressively.
Was complete. I don't know
what what triggered, what happened, what reaction, whatever.
Completely insane. Just just gone off totally. And
he's just
like aggressively just hitting his head. It's a
mixture of empathy, anger, rage, frustration.
What is it?
So,
the incident
of Zayd
when the prophet had adopted him, right? And
then his father and his uncle came in
the search.
And then finally, they came and they met
the prophet and they said, we'll give you
a handsome ransom. Please give us our son
back. The missile said, I won't take a
dime.
I don't take money.
You can take him. But I won't set
him against his wish.
I won't set him against his wish.
And let me please say this again. Sorry.
I I know I'm making a lot of
interjections.
If your marriage is breaking up,
for Allah's sake, don't play nasty games with
the other partner denying them access to that
child.
You're gonna pay a heavy price. You're gonna
pay a heavy price in this world and
in akhirah.
Your children will rebel against you and they'll
go searching for their other partner, mother or
father, and Allah will reunite them. And if
you are one who's been subjected and denied
and barred, persevere.
Your son, your daughter will come knocking your
door. But if you are the one blocking,
hear it from me today.
You will suffer in this world and the
letter.
Can we stoop so low?
Let's agree.
You want a good wife. I wasn't a
good husband but you were a good mother
and I was a good father.
We we we were not gelling
or they were not gelling because I'm happy
with my wife. I mean, please say, like,
no. No. She's not gelling. No. No. We're
gelling well.
You gotta watch craft your words, bro. You
gotta craft your words, bro.
As husband and wife, you weren't getting along.
Why are you denying the other one motherhood
and fatherhood?
And you know what makes a healthy home?
Reinforce and impress on your children. Respect.
They respect your father. They respect your mother.
And it's not sufficient to say, no. Well,
I didn't teach my children not to dis
I didn't teach my children to disrespect you.
No. No. No. You need to teach them
to respect their father.
I never thought my child disrespect your father.
But what happens
when the child throws a tantrum? Dares it.
Like his father. Same.
Same. Dares it.
You have destroyed the self esteem of that
man in that house.
This is this is a small image of
your father.
No. I kid you not. This is serious.
Listen. That you we're not gonna just this
is your father, that's your mother.
Teach your children values and respect
for each other.
Parents are couples are differing on too many
fronts.
Show regard for the values of each other.
I have a reflection of Quran.
So when
when Musa alayhi salam came and the basket
was sailing
and pharaoh and
Asiya,
the faithful wife,
She said, Allah I don't want the palace
of this man. I don't want the palatial
home. Allah, I want the palace in Jannah,
Allah.
She gave up a royal life.
Now there's so many nikas you're performing. The
dowry is so exorbitant. They don't disclose it.
Yeah. This has happened. So I said, no.
What's happening here? No. In the nikar ceremony
when you solemnize in the marriage just so
that we don't divulge
to everyone, we would say, And the you
give in to your new bride is as
you discuss amongst yourself.
Yeah.
And then come 3 weeks later,
I want all my 10 rings back.
We worry so much about the wedding yet
we worry so little about the marriage.
The wedding is one day, the marriage is
forever.
Married for weeks. Married for months. Married for
days.
Why? Because the values were not given.
So as the basket was coming
and Musa alaihi salam was in that basket,
what does the Quran say in chapter 20?
Writes, O Musa,
the protection we sent was
we had cast beauty on you.
So anyone who's seen you was just melted
at your beauty.
We don't know what's love. We know what's
lust.
May Allah give us that love for him.
True love for Allah.
It's said when you need to explain love,
the medium today is lust
because people don't know true love for Allah,
love for the pious.
So
so
the wife of pharaoh said, look at the
deduction from the scholars of tafsir and the
richness of the Quran. And this is what
we learn, how to navigate.
And this is where we get a cue.
This is where we get inspiration. This is
where we get guidance.
So she said,
It's academics.
The Quran always opts for brief speech, comprehensive
speech.
So why did she say
Why didn't she just say
It was mentioned by Anur Quran.
She said, oh my love, oh my hubby,
you know what? He's so gorgeous.
You know, woman and everything nowadays now this
emojis also is a language of its own
Because it's dangerous, available.
Oops. Ouch.
Ouch.
It's platonic.
And from platonic it becomes something else totally.
From platonic you went into pedal.
Oh,
man.
She said to her husband,
love
is real.
The narration of Sahih Muslim,
the neighbor of the prophet came to invite
him.
Said come home for meals. So Nabi Salsam
said, and Ma'ayesh?
Said, no. Only you invited.
You see, that this is also something you
gotta be frank and candid. If you invite
anyone, say you won. Don't say, hey. You
must come. Who? No. You must come.
Now you can't say. You don't say. You
don't know what to say. You don't know
how to say. You just yeah. You must
come. Now I don't know
what? How? I don't know. You can't ask.
You can't say. No, man. Talk.
Say unto them, I don't seek
remuneration
and compensation
for my
mission.
And I am not from amongst those who
pretend and act,
who fake.
The whole world is just fake.
It's acting.
The Quran says if someone knocks your door
and the time is not right, tell him
to go.
And you who are at the door go
back. It's better for you to return.
Now you look in the camera and
hey. But your mama.
Just like he's I tell you.
Yo. Hey, Joe. Come in, my brother. How's
it, man? Hey. Come come come in. Yeah.
We're just talking about you. Hogwash, man. Back
off.
Nonsense.
It's not the right time. Tell him it's
not the right time.
Live the real life.
The nails are fake. The eyes are fake.
The eyelashes are fake.
Everything is fake, my Allah.
The prophet
said before,
respect will be fake.
Like, I mean, respect is not something physical
and tangible.
You know, this is pure, that's generic, that's
real, that's not real. Nabi salallahu alaihi wa
sallam said respect will be fake.
People will be respected
just to protect yourself against his evil. This
guy is nasty.
He can spit venom. So greet him.
In Arabic they say,
sometimes the only way you appease a barking
dog is to throw a bone at it
daily or to give it a slice of
bread. So you say, hey, you feed this
dog? He said, no. No. I just keep
myself away from the bark.
I'm not feeding it.
Your excellency. Your excellency.
What excellency?
Plaque outside the graveyard.
Inside the cemetery, there are many people who
thought the world won't function without them. If
any, the world is doing better.
Nothing's gonna change, man. My day will come.
It'll clock up, drop me off, and it's
over, man.
Promise you, we need to change. We need
to change the coordinates on our set nav,
man.
We're going in the wrong you can see
you're going in the wrong direction but you're
still carrying on with that same GPS.
The signal is not
right.
If you are told go back, go back.
So the prophet
says,
you invited me. What about my Aisha? He
said, no only you.
Rabi said, okay then I'm not coming.
Muslim. Then again,
the person came back and he said I'm
inviting you. Said,
and Maisha? He said, no. Only you. He
said, no. Then I'm not coming.
Patience, his demeanor. He's like, I told you
one time. How many times did I tell
you? No. No.
He's
so calm and composed.
Right? There's different types of people. Some people
are like this. They persisting.
Right?
Was sitting and villager came in.
Muhammad.
It was
Muhammad
here. He was a villager.
The authentic the the Saba said
Can you see this luminous face? Can you
see this brilliant human reclining? He himself is
Muhammad
Listen, I am very loud. I'm strong in
my speech. So I'm gonna ask you, I'm
gonna raise my voice. That's my nature. Don't
feel offended. Nabi salawam said,
Go for it. We have no issues.
Wow. That was the demeanor of our Nabi
The 3rd time he came back and he
invited. And Nabi said, and my Aisha? He
said, yeah. She's also invited. The narration of
Sahih Muslim, they both then go.
The the commentators commenting on the hadith say,
why did the prophet of Allah decline on
the first two instances
and then oblige on the third instance? He
said there was hunger at home.
So he decided
that if it is sleeping without food, we
both will sleep without food. And if it's
eating, we both will eat, my love.
That's love.
Not an emoji and a bouquet and whatever
and teddy bears.
That this is this is real.
This is a connection.
This is a feeling. This is empathy.
This is human
relationship.
Both ways.
When when when when when Assia
told pharaoh,
don't kill Musa.
She said,
basic Arabic grammar. I don't wanna give grammar
and and
lessons here.
Basic Arabic grammar,
it's a plural, but she's talking to one
person.
She addressed her husband with the plural
to denote respect.
How do you call your husband my sister?
Do you use respectful
expressions and terms?
And vice versa.
What impressions are we giving the children? Are
we showing respect?
Our addiction to our phone,
our own
children are not getting the right message. I've
always said the old folks
are an example
of not breaking marriages,
but they're not necessarily example of happy marriages.
Ask me.
One day I was giving this and this
on old man is going like this here.
I say, hey, uncle. Not so much. You're
telling everyone I wasn't talking about you.
Old folks are an example.
They come from a value system. Your must
leave from here. But they're not necessarily example
of happy homes.
The old folks started sleeping separate when, you
know what, the deep heat was too much
and the urine ate. The young generation are
sleeping separate in their thirties.
What's the common exact he snores too much.
What what what are we married for?
My word I don't know what to say.
Allah knows and when I read Quran, I
I cannot in words tell you
the ecstasy that grips me.
So what did Assia say?
She said,
She didn't say coolness of my eyes.
Then she's trying to prevent pharaoh from killing
Musa, So outwardly, apparently, supposedly, logically, it would
be coolness to your eyes don't kill him.
But she said coolness to my eyes then
coolness to your eyes
because she knew her desire,
her passion meant more to him than his
own desire.
She said, love, I like him.
Love, I like him.
Wow. How much regard do we have for
each others?
He came back tired from work.
Oh, I'm feeling for sandwich. Get up. There's
the micro. There's the oven.
And don't take off your socks here.
No, man. No, man. No.
The narration of Bazar, get married, your wife
will bring you wealth.
Your wife will bring you wealth.
How will she bring you wealth?
The right
where the prophet said your wife will bring
revenue, bring wealth, what? Because money per se
is not the object.
There's a greater purpose behind it.
Right? You ask you, why are you traveling
to be happy? Why you got married to
be happy?
Well, yeah, hopefully.
You know, I always tell the youngsters, you
know, when I'm married and I got 2
kids, I'll be happy. I say, how's your
father happy? He's.
In the struggles of obedience,
there's pleasure.
In the apparent pleasures of disobedience, there's misery.
There's misery, my brother. Allah's Qasem. 25 years,
I can tell you. I haven't come across
one person who sinned in his life and
was happy. There was a friend of mine
who was close to me in the early
years in Australia. Young man. So listen to
my talks and took a liking to me.
He
was young. He was
experimenting.
He was freelancing. He was trying the world.
And, I kept on telling him you're going
into a darker web. This thing is gonna
shackle you. You're gonna you're getting into a
darker place.
Sadly at some point, unfortunately, he then claimed
his life and, you know, I just got
a news to say this is what had
happened.
Sin just leads to a dark road. It
comes to an end. It's just misery. There's
just nowhere. Finally, the last thing the devil
says, just take your life.
Whatever the nature of the crime is, sin
was never gonna take you to happiness.
That's for sure.
Sin can make you look happy, only obedience
will make you feel happy.
Every Ramadan, my message to the world wherever
I travel is,
where's the answer to happiness?
Whole year you're eating. It's a lavish breakfast.
It's a sumptuous lunch. It's a finger lickin
dinner. It's decadent desserts. It's a great spread.
It was alright. Nothing to write home about.
Nothing to scream.
But come Ramadan,
from a 5 year old to a 75
year old, everyone is excited for 30 days
for 1 meal.
Why? Because moderate deprivation is the only thing
that can bring happiness to man.
Deprive yourself, limit yourself, behave yourself.
The youth of today, we were was speaking
about lethargy.
If if everyday is a weekend, then how
can you be happy on a weekend?
There's a 1,000 things to do. I just
can't get through the day. And he's like,
no. I'm just chilling, boss. What's up?
Yeah.
What?
Get a life, man.
I said to the youth and I used
to say to my students,
you enrolled in the seminary
at your elementary rudimentary years.
Perhaps you need a jumper cables to boost
your car or someone gave you a a
push from the rear to get your car
started.
But don't think or expect for somebody to
push you to the destination.
Your father told you get up. Your mother
told you get up. Life threw some curve
balls at you.
The Arabic proverb, the death of my seniors
made me a senior. I'm driving in the
car. I just seen my dad having a
heart attack. I've seen the steering moving. I
never sat there before. But when I looked
around me, my siblings were smaller. I had
to just take the leap.
I had to take the leap and hold
the steering to rescue the other passengers.
Grow up. You seen your dad go with
with cancer. You seen your mother fall. You
seen an empire crumble. You still drunk.
Some people grow old, they don't grow wise.
I read an amazing
saying the other day. I met a 15
year old adult and a 40 year old
boy.
I met a 15 year old adult
and a 40 year old boy. He behaves
like a kid.
Yasmin Muawiyah was walking.
And behind him there were 4 great
in their flowing robes.
And he was leading them.
So suleiman ibn Abdul Malik said,
how old are you?
He said,
I mean, woe be to these great scholars
in this robe, people of the cloth. And
they got one young man who barely got
facial hair leading them. How old are you?
He said,
I am no older than the young Usama
when the Nabi of Allah made him the
leader of the expedition and behind him he
had the giants and the stalwarts of Abu
Bakr and Umar.
Those were our youth, man.
They were leading us.
Today's youngster,
you can't even tell him to take take
his mother to the shop. Mommy, how long
you'll be?
What?
He says I went to visit Omar bin
Abdul Aziz.
I'm gonna mention 1, 2 things and start
wrapping up. Wallahi, what I was hoping to
speak on, I haven't even touched it. And,
it's gonna it's really a topic of its
own. I wanted to speak on about 12
fitnas.
It's a whole write up of.
It's 12 fitanas.
I was hoping to get there, but inshallah
for another time whenever Allah has willed it
to be, it would be there.
We all are stuck
with boulders
blocking
our own caves of life.
Those 3 people in those caves
did some amazing feat for those boulders to
move.
Do we have
actions in our reserves
that we can tap into
when we're seeing things are just not making
headway?
But we all have some boulders
blocking. Some child is not
recovering from his addict addiction.
Some this is not happening. That is not
happening.
Let me come back to that incident and
mention 1, 2 things and tie it up
with this here.
There is a fake pleasure in sin.
There is a wholesome
spiritual ecstasy in obedience
and in between that there is a divine
pleasure in resisting sin.
There's a divine resistance
sin. You're just in resisting mode. You didn't
go into any obedience. You're just in resisting
mode. He's messaging me. He's messaging me. But,
no. You Allah, I'm not going to do
it. You Allah, I'm not going to do
it.
Of course, for the time, there is restlessness.
There's no doubt about that. There is restlessness.
At the at the time when the urge
is in full swing, there is restlessness. There
there that's real. That that this world is
a place of test. There is that restlessness.
But once you've overcome the restlessness,
oh, man.
That that joy is indescribable.
It's ineffable.
It's something else. You can't quantify it. It's
something else.
So these 3 people were desperate.
And then they said, listen. We're blocked up
in life. Yeah?
There's no way we're gonna come out.
You need serious actions in your life
to get you out of
the the the the crisis in which we
are engulfed.
Yeah.
You you know the
you need to go buy something and
the child say, no. No. My got lot
money.
Now in his little, weak, simple mind, he
thinks that he's lot. He doesn't know. What
you need here is much more.
Josefa ibn Yaman said,
a time will come,
nobody will be rescued from the but
the one who begs Allah and cries incessantly
like how a drowning person screams for help.
When a person is drowning,
he's not like, are there any life savers
available?
Please notify them.
I've mentioned this many times and let me
just say it here. My wife is gonna
say why I said it. But Anyway, we
were in the Bahamas
and, on a jet ski. There's a child
in every adult and that child was in
me at its full at that day.
And, I needed to show her my expertise
on the throttle.
And, yeah,
I flipped the whole machine.
Literally flipped the machine.
And due to panic,
I forgot I had
a life vest on and so did she.
She's holding that side, I'm holding this side,
and we're screaming.
And at that time, this thing kinda dawned
on me. You see, often when you're in
a situation,
then it hits you. We were doing
humanitarian work in Lombok Island after the earthquake,
but shortly after Hajj. I just come back
from Hajj in 2019. And then immediately, we
went to Lombok.
And then we drove for 3 hours. We
summited the hill. And then I looked around
me, it was nothing but ruin and debris.
Nothing but ruin and debris.
And I rotated my gaze. Said, Nali
used to often.
He would just sit in solitude and then
rotate his palm and then talk to himself.
Ali
Ali
I leave the journey to Aqir. It is
so long. The road is unknown.
The path is hazardous.
But do you have adequate do you know
where you're heading?
So I sat there when we summited, it
was scorching, sweltering, blistering hot.
I rotated my gaze.
They had gathered everyone in a make shelter
and I had to give the talk there.
And when I looked around, there was no
home, there was no dwelling.
That's the time it hit me. The prophet
sallallahu alaihi wasallam said, if you miss one
salah it's like you lost all your family
and all your belongings.
Now I'm like seeing it real.
None will be rescued from the fitna of
that time,
but the one who makes dua to Allah
like a drowning person.
Create a home of tahajjud.
Create a home of salah.
Put that phones down. Allah give me tawfiq.
Allah give you tawfiq.
Honestly,
limited,
Wi Fi free connection
that has just brought misery in our homes.
We're only browsing, perusing, surfing, and nothing other
than depression and misery.
Because constantly you've seen something else so you
automatically feeling ungrateful about yourself.
I didn't have, I didn't enjoy, I didn't
experience.
So this person,
Asmari,
he goes in the search and he comes
to this particular tribe in Yemen.
Banu Hudra.
They were known for preserving the language. You
know, if you go in the outskirts also,
they speak the more pure language or the
climate is better.
Well, now it's so, you know, industrialized and
there's
so much,
you know, pollution
everywhere so it's questionable.
Anyway,
he's walking there. Many incidents had happened there.
So the people of this tribe were known,
the men, to have soft hearts, and the
women were known to have exceptional beauty and
modesty.
The men were very soft and the women
were very modest and very beautiful.
So he passes by and he sees on
a plaque it's written that
Oh, people
and this is now in eloquent,
refined, pure, wholesome Arabic.
Oh, people you know, like, we have graffiti.
You know, sometimes sitting in the toilet and
following the arrow.
And then you have this myth in our
communities
that when you go to the loo and
the lavatory,
then you clear your throat to dispel the
gin.
What a joke.
Then what you is is that how jinnads
go?
There's this myth
The Fuqaha speak about if you clear your
throat without any reason, that certain scholar say
it invalidates your prayer.
The jurors say do the clearing of the
throat if you have a problem that urine
is dropping and just change your posture to
make sure that there is no drops remaining.
It's got nothing to do to drive away.
It's like
knowledge is so important.
So
he comes there and it's written on this
block
or people help a young
man who's gripped in a crush,
in an infatuation,
and he's head over heels over a woman.
How does he help himself?
This is so he's here to learn Arabic.
And I told you in the 7th century,
he was a philologist, he was a grammarian.
There's
so many incidents about his. One day I
couldn't sleep at night and I got up.
So I went in my dining room and
I took out my kitab and
I started reading and I stumbled over an
incident of which is captured in.
One day he was walking.
I mean, makes mention of this Asmari.
There's so many incidents about him and, there's
this young girl singing
and in her melodious voice she's saying that,
you know, I fell in love with this
person and it has destroyed me.
I ask Allah to forgive me for the
love and the infatuation I had over this
man.
So Asma'i said
she was repenting
from her infatuation
but her voice was so sweet that I
said your voice is so attractive and seductive
and melodious.
She's making tawba but I'm like, she's creating
a sin with the tawba if you know
what I mean.
You know when it's a strange woman even
when she screams, ah, but she's so sweet.
But she's so cute.
And when it's your
own,
then it's gruff.
Somebody else is honey, then here it's like,
smell the coffee.
Excuse the pun.
May Allah give
us. May Allah give us. May Allah give
us love. May Allah give us warmness. May
Allah give us affection.
Date your spouse.
Excite your spouse. Surprise your spouse.
The prophet salallahu alaihi wa sallam said when
you're outside and if you're attracted to anyone,
come home because your spouse is no different.
Islam calls you back home. The world is
calling you outside.
So, Asma'i said, I said to this girl,
Wow, sister. That's so
articulate.
That's so stunning.
So she didn't fall for that. She said,
why are you praising me? Why are you
lauding me? This is not eloquent. Eloquent is
the words of Allah.
We're gonna do q and a. Maybe I'm
gonna do a sharp landing.
Okay. Let's mention this and call it today.
May Allah bless you. I hope I've,
you know, as Mona said, wanna keep it
formal, informal,
that that we take something. There's a lot
of things to take, to process, to digest,
to comprehend, to relate. Look here, I must
also say, every delinquent child
is not necessarily
a result of poor upbringing
because you're gonna have serious problems than reconciling
with the rebellious children of yahoo balayhis salam.
And you're gonna have a serious challenge
explaining the rebellious sun,
khanahu alaihis
salam. So, every every rebellious child is not
necessarily
is not necessarily
a result of wrong upbringing.
Commonly, averagely, yes, We are fallible and we
have so many mistakes we've made and we
can see that. We can see that. You
know, you've seen your son doing nonsense but
you know that's you in him.
You can't tell him that's me but you
know that's that's you. You know the boy
who said, dad, I brought my report and
I found yours also.
You say, okay. Leave both in the closet
there. But because
he knows what you did, so what are
you gonna thrill him with?
The challenge is let me be frank. As
I said earlier,
today outside, it's too dangerous.
Me, I I was, you know, a bit
of a delinquent in my school days
and may Allah bless my parents.
Though my parents in their own space were
not educated,
but they did everything to educate me.
They were simple minded. They didn't know much.
But they said, no. No. Give my children
the best.
I mean, till today I'm traveling for so
many years, my mom still cries every time
I travel.
Till today my mom, she gets emotional.
But, ma, you know my life is more
in the air than on the ground.
But that's a mother.
That's a parent.
They gave me knowledge. They educated me.
Today I can stand tall in society,
I can rub shoulders with the simple and
the elite. It's because of the values of
my parents that they have impressed upon me.
In our time when a child was
playing truancy
and he scaled the fence of the school
and he was being a naughty boy,
what was a naughty boy? He went to
the shop around the corner there. He maybe
picked up one uncle stompy from the floor
and he played Pacman.
I don't know if I'm too old here.
I'm I'm I'm talking of eighties.
I'm talking of eighties here. Now I'm just
being generic here, but actually that's what Allah
forgive we all did.
That that was a naughty boy.
You know the old folks that say, Allah
must forgive us, man. Hey. We did a
lot of wrong, man.
We did a lot of wrong. Lot of
wrong. Is uncle what you did?
You know me and a
Wallahi Allah is my witness.
I still have a vivid memory.
Probably I was 10 years old.
Right?
Mid eighties.
We plain.
Someone said wife
you are so rude. I'm going to tell
your mother you didn't say auntie.
When the world cup took place here,
there was a mainstream media that carried an
article
on some of the infamous
players
in mainstream
football.
1 out of that, turned that article during
world cup,
was guilty of *.
Another
in an interview had said he had bedded
and slept with 500 women.
My son, 3rd son now, who's a father,
alhamdulillah,
I think he was 5 years old.
I was giving a talk back then.
He came out. He said, Abu,
how did all the aunties one room?
That's how clean nature sends them.
That's how pure mother nature dispatches them.
And this is what we do to them.
This is how
we destroy them.
That mine was so clean and pure. Wallah,
I remember this as a 10 year old
child. That wife was crude, was harsh, was
brutal, was not dignified, was not respectful.
It was auntie, it was uncle. You couldn't
go straight to use those terms.
You take a youngster today doesn't know diplomatic
language when speaking to an Ustad. He wouldn't
say,
is your wife here?
Is that is that language?
Sayyidina Musa is returning with his wife from.
She's in confinement.
He sees a flame. He sees an amber.
He tells his wife, hold here.
I see some flames there and live ember.
Maybe I'll get a sense of direction there.
And then he says
stay here. The word
is a plural expression for a single person.
Again, an expression of absolute respect and dignity
when talking to his own partner and spouse.
The wife of Lut has been referred to
as ajuz.
Ajuz means old lady.
She was a kafira.
Some scholars say she was not old by
age.
Not withstanding she was a disbeliever
but the term ajus
elderly woman was used because she was the
spouse of a.
Sorry, uncle, is your wife here? What?
What?
Is Muhammad's mom here?
Auntie is uncle Ibrahim here?
They come to the door, wonderful looking.
Can you bring him in? Can you usher
the uncle in? Can you sit him down?
Can you make a conversation?
How you keeping uncle? My dad's in the
bathroom. My mom is just in the kitchen,
she'll be here. Can I get you some
water? Do you want to use the bathroom?
How are you keeping uncle? Where are you?
All okay? How's things?
Can you make a 5 minute discussion and
then connect the seniors to the seniors? Or
even that's a big ask.
Let's mention this here and hopefully I don't
digress here so that we can do some
basic q and a. So
he wrote here the next day, he said
when I seen this, I wrote it,
I I responded to the sentence.
I said,
treat your fantasy
conceal your your treat your melody,
conceal your fantasy.
And listen life
is
about.
The next day I pass by, this unknown
person responds again and he writes there, on
a stone there.
So many who come out relapse, come out
relapse, come out relapse,
simply cannot re even the sky is not
your limit.
You can do anything.
The sahaba, they dropped it. I always marvel
at the sahaba, they were humans.
Anak
was a woman of beauty.
Had a relationship with her. Now this is
this is emotions attached. And I like to
say to the youth out there, may Allah
transmit my message. You know, they would phone
me. I'm inundated.
Oh, I like her. She likes me. We're
happy and everything. Her parents are happy. It's
only my father's got an issue.
I said, you know what's your problem? 1st,
take responsibility.
You go in the shop, you take a
jacket, you put it on. You like it,
everything is good. You post it on social
media, you get the likes, you get everything,
everything is good, you negotiate the price, you
say you're gonna wait for this occasion, work
out everything, then you ask your mother, mommy
can I buy a jacket?
Now when she says no, it's just not
a no to a jacket. It's a no
to the post. It's a no to social
media. It's a no to the occasion. It's
a no to the function. You created this
whole
relationship
and this whole attachment to this here. Now
you say, no. I don't wanna hurt my
mother but I don't wanna let go. And
then this just goes on and on and
it's a unending vicious circle and cycle.
Every second day, this is the story. You
start the relation, create the emotion and then
9 out of 10, there's gonna be one
parent that's not happy. No. I don't wanna
go into it without my parents' blessings.
Well, then you you have to drop it.
Had a relation with Anak. He then accepted
Islam. Anak said to you, come. Let's meet
up. He said, no. I can't meet up.
I'm a Muslim. Now this is an emotion.
It's not easy. It's not easy to part
with an emotion.
It's an
attachment. So she said, okay. Let's get married.
Allah revealed the verse
You can't wet the polytheist
till she doesn't take the
shahada. He said, I can't. Done. Over.
I mean, how When the verse was
revealed,
Some narrations say at that time said, no,
Umar had 2 wives who had not accepted
Islam. And the verse came down you need
to part ways. He ended it. Finish.
You know, no. Okay. Listen. We're not getting
married but we can still be friends.
You never know.
Yeah. You know.
And, you know, even if I don't have
your phone number on my phone, you'll always
be in my heart.
Yeah.
Yeah. Remember, I'm always there for you.
Yeah.
What?
So
he said If you cannot
behave, manage yourself and say, no. This is
not a life, man. I I can't be
playing this game, man. Time is running. I
met a man in London who attended my
talk and he really appreciated it. He said
I went back and forth for 20 years.
And after 20 years, I said no. And
I'm grateful that Allah has given me a
life. He went back to his native country
Pakistan and he opened up rehab. Mashallah, he's
doing great work. I met a man in
Australia. I did an interview with him as
well. Also lived the life on the streets
and then he said no, it's enough man.
You know what? I've I've I've got to
turn the corner, man. I've got to turn
the corner.
I've got to stand up for myself. And
he said, I was determined.
Discipline.
He who lives a life without discipline
is exposed to grievous ruin.
An undisciplined person is a headache to himself
and a heartache to others.
Yes.
Discipline. Life is all about discipline.
On a recent trip to London, when I
was taking the train in Dubai from terminal
a to terminal b,
So I just hopped on in. Every time
my eyes just, you know, on aviation, I
just pick up so many lessons because travel
just teaches me so much so much.
Earlier this year when I was in Mumbai,
I was standing at the wrong carousel waiting
for my bag. And I said, searching for
happiness in this world is like waiting for
your bag at the wrong carousel.
How frustrating is it? You turn in this
bag, you're rotating that bag, you're looking at
the monitor, then you're oh, you're at the
wrong carousel.
If you're looking for happiness in material things,
you're waiting at the wrong carousel. Happiness will
never arrive at your at before
you.
Yes. Indeed, you will find that peace.
Your bag might not be as big and
fancy as that. It will be simple, but
it will be wholesome.
But it will be yours.
It will be yours. It will be real.
It will be tangible.
I often say when you're traveling,
2 boarding gates next to each other,
but they're flying in opposite directions.
It's in New York.
Last announcement. Oh, so you said in New
York next to no. No. No. No. No.
The gates are next to each other. 2
people can be buried next to each other.
One in paradise, one in *.
The the the the the
were also with the Sahaba
In Uhud,
the Sahaba had peace. The
were restless.
The next day when he came back,
he found a response and he found a
corpse there on the floor.
We tried. I couldn't manage the grave. I
couldn't resist the temptation.
My soul passed away. I'm happier off dying
in Allah's obedience than living in his disobedience.
May Allah bless you all. My dear brother,
Karinaim, is a good friend of mine. Our
relationship goes back to
the early nineties when I had enrolled at
the seminary and that's the time our relation
developed and evolved. And Mawlana Muhammad Sidat, mashaAllah,
for he's still in work. Hafiz Shokat is
a good family friend as well and of
course there are many others here. Please these
are just few that have been, you know,
actively,
pursuing me to
agree and obliged to this program and I'm
hopeful to the almighty that insha'Allah
whatever interactions we had and whatever message was
transmitted
it would inshallah drive a message, it will
ring a bell, it resonated with you and
hopefully we can go back to the drawing
board, effect the changes,
change the coordinates on our compass insha'Allah
and drive a fresh journey. On that note,
I conclude and then we'll ask them to
open the floor to the q and a.
We'll try and keep it brief to wrap
up,
shortly thereafter.
Masha'Allah.
We say JazakAllah here to Hazza Mulla Salim
Ansap. May Allah preserve Hazza Mufti Salab. Keep
him with afiyah and he shed over us
for a long time
guiding us
in every matter inshallah.
For those
profound advices.
If I sum it up basically hitting the
nail on the head, Alhamdulillah. I think every
aspect has been covered and inshallah we're looking
forward to the next program
whereas the Muftisib indicated
the 12 vices and so on.
May Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
make it easy upon the Ummat of Rasulullah
SAWSALAM
that I want to say to our parents
and this would be on behalf of all
our institutes.
Our Muslim Schools,
our Madaris, our Makatib.
Alhamdulillah, Allah has blessed us
with teachers.
We are saying to our parents,
let's tie the educational triangle.
Our commitment
to our students and our children and to
the youth
is at a 1000%.
We look forward to meeting them every single
day.
We're saying to our parents,
inshallah you come on board with us and
let us steer this together
so that we can get the best out
of our children and they will become leaders
inshallah in the ummah of Rasulullah
Next
up inshallah,
we're going to move on to the q
and a session.
I'm going to ask, the principal of Roshni
Islamic
School, mister Hafid Shokat Ali Khan to join
me on stage.
Avisab will be chairing the q and a
session. We probably would have maybe about half
an hour or so and, immediately after the
final dua is made Insha Allah, we'll perform
our Isha Salah in Jama'ah.
And, we have some ulama in the background.
Mufti Muhammad Nana was the principal of our
Vidma, Muttabia in Roshni
who will be going through the questions. There's
also a QR code that's going to be
posted
on the screen. So you can simply take
out your phone and you can just scan
the q r code and it will take
you to a form and you can put
your question there. Although Alhamdulillah questions have been
coming in already over the past few days.
And, I would ask Abaha Patel who's our
deputy principal at Roshni Islamic to make a
way around the ladies section if anyone wants
to ask a question and will indicate to
us on the side.
And, brother Idris
answer on the mail section inshallah.
So how it's basically going to work? We're
gonna take 5 questions from the floor and
then we're gonna move to 5 questions that
we've already received
via the link. So inshallah without further ado,
I'll ask, mister Khan Afishoka to to take
the proceedings forward.
Alhamdulillah. Firstly, we thank Allah for the bounties,
the blessings,
and the gifts that Allah has
bestowed upon us.
And we send durood, salaams, and salutations
to our beloved prophet Muhammad
Alhamdulillah,
Allahu Akbar. How blessed,
how fortunate are we that we spend the
time in the company of Mufti Sahib.
Allahu
Akbar. The words of wisdom, the pearls that
came out this evening
truly, truly I'm sure inspired each one of
us.
As as educationists,
certainly,
there's fantastic
ideas that Mufti Saab has shared with us
and Insha'Allah,
we'll try our level best level best to
implement
and try and make a difference in the
lives
of our beloved learners, insha'Allah.
Allah give us the strength,
the good health, insha'Allah,
to continue serving and trying to make a
difference
in the communities
and the lives of the learners that we
serve, inshallah.
So like Mawlana said, we'll take 5 questions
at a time. We'll start off on the
right. Ladies are always right like this in
my seats perfectly set from where I am
seated. Men on the left because ladies are
always right. So I'm gonna ask Abba, how
are Insha'Allah
we'll get Mufti Sab responding to to those
questions Insha'Allah.
Abohawa?
Oh, okay. Sure.
Nothing at the moment. Okay.
Then maybe we can go on to the
men's side. Any questions that we have? I
do have few questions that have come through
online. Maybe we'll start with that just to
to warm up the
the the the the mujah, inshallah.
So the first I'll do the first five
questions that I have here.
The first question
is
how to deal with
addiction.
Is there any hope for an addict? The
drugs,
alcohol
or even *?
The second question,
how do you convince kids
that have girlfriends before marriage?
That is wrong.
What is a suitable age
to give
your child a cellphone?
Question 4, educators
and our are putting in the effort
but parental and learner support
towards raising academic standards
and the enthusiasm to study is lacking.
There is lethargy from certain parents and learners.
How do we change the
minds
within the parents
and learner community?
And maybe the 5th one,
speaking lies
are becoming common.
What steps
can be taken
to resolve
this issue with the community?
Okay.
I always like to say this year that
every question is merited. Every question is important.
We appreciate every question. No question is too
simple, too easy or irrelevant.
So, please feel free within the time space
that we have. We welcome
and to the best of our ability, we
will reply those questions inshallah.
I think pretty much my address kinda overarchingly
addressed in a comprehensive way those things, but
maybe now we're choosing to single them out.
Is there hope for an edict? Of course,
there's hope. As long as you breathe in,
there's hope.
There's hope for you to repent quickly. Quickly
here many scholars say means that as long
as you live in and you change, there
is hope. Now, when we say to change,
you have to
make adjustments in your life. So when when
a youngster, for example, comes out of the,
rehab, I say to him, you have to
give up all your friend circle. No. I
cannot do that. No. Then you don't wanna
change.
Then you don't wanna change.
If you want to change, then you have
to be ready to give up that network.
You have to get get give up that
phone. Because on that phone, there's that context,
there's those messages, there's that back and forth
thing. You have a * addiction, your phone
needs to become public property.
You need to go and do your work
in the kitchen. You need to do it
in in the room where anyone and everyone
has access. You can't have a private code
to it. Now, if you choose to continue
to give safety and amnesty
and to to to give shelter and and
cover your wrong, then obviously the whispers will
will continue and you will continue doing the
wrong. So Allah says regarding
the they didn't participate in tabuk. And they
said, oh, we really wanted to. We so
desperately wanted to. Allah said,
If they wanted to participate,
there would have been active
planning to participate.
The scholars say it means if you claim
something, but you don't take steps towards it,
that means your claim is fake.
So I want to change. I want to
give up addiction. Of course, you can give
up. We just spoke about it how how
people have done it in their life. But
then you need to break away from that
friend. You need to give up that device
totally. You need to deactivate your access to
that so that your access to Allah can
be opened up. And then you would see
that happening.
I think there was another question there, Harissa.
Converse kids that have girlfriends before marriage. How
do you convince? So so this is this
is a two sided thing.
Number 1,
we need to tell them
that you know what and and I I
can give you just simple basic,
facts on the ground that by you dating
and courting,
you're only complicating your life because all what
you're doing is creating a rosy image,
to a fantasy,
and both of them are playing up for
the moment,
which is a facade and an optical illusion
and a deception
because they meet up at the appropriate time.
They they dress up according to the likes
of each other. So you you playing into
the hopes and the expectations
and you're not seeing the real person. And
this continues and continues and you you you
begin to imagine that, oh, you know what?
She's really got green eyes because the I
only I'm using this as a gen as
a figurative expression because she's only wearing contacts.
And you know what? Her teeth are straight,
man, because she's got braces on. And you
know what? Her hair is like this. But
it's all this that's just a facade that's
on top. And then suddenly, you get married.
And this is a figurative,
expression to all what I said. Now you're
seeing there's rage, there's anger, there's anger management,
there's lack of composure, there's addiction, there's habits,
there's a past, there's so many things. So
this 3 year that you were doing was
just a lie in which you were going
around in circles. That's the one side. The
second side of it is, as parents, we
also need to start taking active measures that
as soon as they are of age, we
need to start processing it. Now, that being
said, and I talk again from the capacity
of just not a humble scholar, but a
father as well. The time in which we
live, unfortunately, our children are not,
economically viable and responsible enough. By us getting
them married, we need to do a lot
within our own means to get them off
the ground. It would mean getting him a
house. It would mean getting him the rental.
It would mean getting him a car. It
would mean supplementing, complimenting. That's the brutal truth.
But if Allah has given us and our
children are on the right and we can't
use it for them, then for who are
we going to use it? So that's not
the ideal thing. These kids need to live.
They need stand tall. They need to understand
the responsibility.
But today, averagely, commonly speaking, there are the
exceptions. There are those that have excelled. They'll
only take the leap once they've got everything
covered. But by and large, that's not the
case. So we gotta find a common ground.
So I'm saying, we need to make them
understand that this is, you know what? It's
it's it's it's a fantasy you're going down.
You're gonna get nowhere with this here. You
just you you're just deceiving yourself
by supposedly assuming you're getting to know that
person and you're not coming to know anything
about that person. I mean, you're married 20
years and you think you know your partner
and then you get a curve ball like,
oh,
I thought I knew him. I thought I
knew her. You don't know after marriage properly.
Where you gonna know before marriage?
Right? And what happens is there's no excitement
left to nika. There's so much dating and
courting.
You can only enjoy iftar if you restrain
the whole day.
Then iftar is iftar.
But if whole day you're smelling food, you're
nibbling food, then what's iftar?
So that moment of joy, happiness comes with
that discipline.
And also parents need to take a bit
of an active role, find the common grounds
that if they're of age, let's give them
the leap, let's give them the push start,
propel them, get them going, and then help
them out to to to make the beginning
and take the steps.
Next question. The suitable suitable age to give
a child
a cell phone in this day and age?
It's a it's a real question.
It's a merited question. It's a difficult question.
I wouldn't
say this is the age. I would say
stall it as long as possible.
Stall it as long as possible. As long
as you could be with them and give
them. You know you know what I say?
Is,
Rabi'r bin said,
when I seen the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa
sallam,
I was so impressed
and I was so consumed
by his beauty
that I no longer had space to be
impressed with anyone else.
I was so intrigued.
So I'm saying
keep your child connect with you with physical
activity, engagement, things that by the time the
phone comes,
he doesn't get intrigued to substitute this but
rather he knows what is real, what is
absolute, what is tangible. You remember we used
to go here. Mama, you remember we did
this. He he or she has those fond,
good, rich, wholesome memories. So I can't say
this is the right age. I'm saying stall
it as long as you can. And to
stall it, that means discipline we need to
do.
In our quest to raise the academic standards,
we find that our learners have a lack
of enthusiasm.
How can this be turned around?
So I think I touched on the ADHD,
attention deficit hyperactivity
disorder,
And,
again for me, significantly,
it boils down to this distraction and disturbances.
Try and read Quran
or do research without the phone next to
you. And try and do it with the
phone next to you. And you will be
appalled to discover
how distracted you are. So when the prophet
sallallahu alaihi wa sallam went for,
if I can just ask the brothers to
settle down there just so that we can
just do this q and a quickly inshallah
and then wrap it up. When the prophet
sallallahu alaihi wa sallam went for Mi'raj
and then there was a spectacle, there was
beauty, there was splendor, there was so much
there.
Right? Anybody's eyes would be dazzled by the
beauty there.
And Allah praised the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam
for the discipline of his gaze.
The prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam's gaze did
not stray this way or that way, but
it remained focused
to the point on which Allah
had presented.
Today in anything that we do, ask yourself
how often and how long can the children
remain focused. So I think
we need to start some exercises,
you know, like,
free phone zones. Do some lessons whether we
read in some or Quran
and and just off the bell, off everything
and try and maintain that for this duration
we're gonna remain focus.
And if we can move out those things
in addition to I mean, I think today
on on the side of of lethargy and
and lack of enthusiasm,
you cannot exclude
the intake of foods. You are what you
eat.
You are what you eat. Right?
And and and and you just see give
a child, a toddler, an infant,
something heavy, fizzy in sugar, and the child
is hyperactive. The child just cannot be focused,
cannot be calm, cannot be tamed, cannot be
regulated, cannot be kept, you know, in one
place. So I think it's a combination of
factors,
but I doubt we could navigate
without bringing the dimension of the phone in
the equation. But again, for the phone thing,
if you really think about it,
we need to do some discipline on our
self.
Maybe maybe it's going to feature later. Let
me just say this here.
One of the most effective ways
they say
communicating to children is like dialing a phone
number.
If you miss 1 digit, you don't get
through.
Reaching out to children is like dialing a
phone number.
And if you remember the number as a
afterthought, it doesn't work.
So if you you dial this number 78623
and then somebody said 082. Okay. 082 in
the end. No. No. No. No. 082 had
to happen in the beginning.
You had to tell him this when he
was 3 years, not when he's 13.
You dial in the code in the end.
I'm not saying give up hope. I'm just
saying take responsibility
that you know what? We came in a
bit too late too long too long. If
we came in earlier, we would have been
smarter. So one of those
effective ways
is to curtail
perks and privileges.
That's the most effect. But now when the
child at a small age, so you don't
have to get wild or aggressive or anything,
And I think it took me so many
years to learn, understand, and appreciate.
Listen, you're not gonna be getting this here.
Now the child is gonna throw a tantrum.
He's going to rebel. He's gonna get aggressive.
He's gonna go wild. He's gonna become and
compose.
The key thing is don't lose your cool
and don't buckle under pressure.
And the worst thing you can do is
when one parent is putting the discipline, the
other parent overrides the discipline.
That's the worst thing you can do.
I cannot find
a more amazing example
than the Quran.
The delegation came to the prophet sallallahu alaihi
wa sallam and they asked him 3 questions.
Tell us about the 7 sleepers,
Tell us about the soul. And tell us
about Dhul Qurnayn.
And then we will believe you're a prophet.
And Nabi said, come tomorrow I'll tell you.
On the reliance that Jibril will come, communicate
it with Jibril and then I'll
transmit it to you. And he sallallahu alaihi
wasallam unintentionally
inadvertently
slipped up to say insha'Allah
and that created a pause in revelation
and these people started exploiting the delay in
the response to say Then you're not a
prophet.
We said give us these answers, you're a
prophet. You said come tomorrow.
And Allah
impressed upon the nabi of Allah salallahu alaihi
wasalam the importance of insha'Allah
and it was put on hold momentarily.
And Allah
is aware
that what these people are saying and doing.
And after a duration of 15 days,
Now you take the phone away Friday. You're
not getting this phone till next week Friday.
Saturday morning, he's gone with his phone nicely.
Everything is over.
Nothing.
You got to maintain discipline.
There will be a tantrum. There will be.
But like I said, it's gonna happen at
the right stage. Some of us, our kids
are a bit too old and too advanced.
And now if we take drastic measures, the
rebellion becomes worse.
That that's real. He'll walk out. He'll walk
out. He's too silly, too naive, too daring.
He's got no,
guilt, nothing. He could be walking. There was
a mother that phoned me and I cried.
She said, oh, my heart just sunk.
She said, I'm tired of crying out of
fear for my daughter.
I'm tired of crying out of panic that
the car will knock my daughter.
I'm tired of crying out of fear that
my daughter will come drunk because I've I'm
I I've exhausted all the fears
because she's been out at the most odd
hours, at the most odd times, in the
most scary places, with the most unknown of
strangers.
So she has dried up my tears out
of every fear. I can't cry anymore. So
if if if if somebody tells me, you
know what? She's with this person who's so
evil nothing can be I've I've just cried
it right out.
So anyway, I'm saying discipline by curtailing and
continue in the love.
Listen, you're not gonna get this here. You're
not gonna get this here.
There's gonna be no allowance and this is
it. Now no allowance or eat out means
you gotta eat at home yourself.
When you wanna go out and eat yourself.
So there needs to be harmony between parents.
You need to sustain the plan of action
and maintain it.
The last question
of the 1st batch of 5 of course.
Speaking lies becoming very common in our community.
How can we try and resolve this situation?
I mean, we all grew up as kids,
you know, when you spoke a lie, they
put chilies in your mouth. Right? When you
use vulgar, they put chilies in your mouth.
But we live in a lie a world
where lies is the norm.
You know? It's it's,
look at the irony of our society. Right?
If a beggar comes or a poor person
comes and he steals a loaf of bread,
people whole mob will get onto him, you
know. And then you'll get
the drug industry, the business industry,
the food industry
that will rob the daylights out of you
and they'll call it profit and they will
exploit and abuse, but that's legal theft. That's
legal theft. We're living in a life and
a world where lies is just perpetuated.
You can deceive. You can lie. You can
distort. The irony of the whole thing is
people are caught out and they still persist
on the lie. Like you exposed.
You exposed. No. I never steal. Okay. One
minute just, rewind the camera.
No. The camera is fake. No. No. I
mean, just like process your own words. Look
in the mirror and see what you're saying,
man, you know. So lies has become the
norm. The prophet
was set in and he said,
must I tell you people about major since
the hadith is in Bukhary?
We said, tell us he said,
a scribing part to what Allah is a
major sin.
Disobedience to your parents.
He was relaxing. For jealous,
he got up. He said,
lies, false evidence, lies, false evidence, lies. Sahaba
said he repeated himself so much in our
hearts we tried to say I wish the
Nabi of Allah keeps quiet and observe silence
in the sense we got the message. But
of course the prophet of Allah as in
Rasul Muhamalim it's mentioned He repeated himself salallahu
alaihi wasalam to impress the repugnance.
The repugnance of lies. The scholars say
the obligation of an injunction
can be appreciated
in the context with which it's spared
And the repugnance,
of an offense can be understood again in
the context of which it appears in the
Quran. I know this is academic. Let me
put flesh to the theory and simplify it.
So, to appreciate the richness of of goodness
to parents, Allah pays it up with monotheism.
So, Allah is talking of tawhid and when
he's talking of tawhid, he says, and be
good to your parents. So, the most important
of things is tawhid. That's the basis.
Worship Allah, be kind to your parents.
Then when it comes to lies,
Allah says in chapter 22 Surah Hajj,
Give up and abstain
from idolatry
and coupled with the prohibition of idolatry
Allah pays lies.
So the wicked nature and the repugnance and
the evil of lies can be understood that
it has been paired up with polytheism,
with idolatry.
So as parents, we need to lead by
example
and we need to put measures in place
to say these consequences of lies.
We'll take some questions from the floor.
Any questions we have here on the floor?
Hey. That's gonna be a dangerous one.
Oh, my word.
Meet me after the talk.
No.
Basically, I mean, it was a humorous ending
but I I kinda tied it up to
the sentiment of how desperate and frantically I
was screaming.
So my better half was on this side
of the of the jet ski. I was
on this side here. And due to the
panic, I was overwhelmed.
And I'm telling her, like, love hold there.
I'm holding here. And we're screaming. Only when
the guy came to rescue, I realized, hey.
You know what? I got a life jacket
on. I was in such panic that I
didn't realize that. And the dua of Husayfar
radiAllahu anhu,
fitnas will come only the one that will
be rescued
who calls out to Allah like a drowning
person.
And that's the time he kinda jolted me
and he gave me that year. Like even
when you got measure and cover, you know,
I keep on telling people, unfortunately,
today we listen to the Jummah lecture like
how on a flight we listen to the
emergency
in in a in a emergency landing, the
the the the rules and that you're you
know what? You're sitting at the emergency exit.
Are you happy to help? Yeah. Yeah. We're
happy to help you. You know what? This
mass will
close the doors and take off. That's how
unfortunately we listen to the talks of Allah
and rasool Allah SWAN. Like, you know what?
This is not gonna happen to me.
Do
you have any questions?
Okay. I'll go on to the online. I'll
continue with the online questions.
What is the terbiyah process in the upbringing
of children? The role of the father and
mother is outlined
in the Quran and practice of Rasulullah
Yeah. I I I think I I I
did touch on this here. The the the
reality is there is no perfect parent. The
perfect parent was Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam.
What kind of works sometimes for one child
doesn't necessarily work for the other child. And
Allah teaches you through that system that it's
not your upbringing, it is Allah that guided
them. Because what happened? You got 3 kids,
someone say, Hey, Mashallah. Your children are very
disciplined. You are me, line and length. Oh,
I got them measured. And then comes number
4, and he sorts you out.
And he just goes against the whole norm
of the family. And you ask yourself, wait,
man.
But the same house, same value, same thing.
And then Allah makes you understand it's not
you that did it. It's Allah that allowed
it to happen. So coupled with everything, here's
a reflection from the Quran. Allah tells the
prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam
If you had to spend all the wealth
in the world, you wouldn't able to unite
them, but Allah united them.
Hakim al Ummah writes under the we learn
from this
that to instill a good value in the
child
is not in the, the the the jurisdiction
or the control or the grasp of the
father nor is it in the grasp of
the teacher to instill that value in in
in the student. So we need to work
together. I said earlier on and I'm saying
again,
don't don't oppose
each other's views. You are trying different strategies
and angles. Some might try what worked for
them as a child with their parent. Of
course, we need to be cognizant of an
evolving world and evolving challenges,
but,
it is only Allah who can ultimately
steer them onto that right.
Parents are becoming more lenient. The question here.
J j j, please, sir.
Hello.
Assalamu alaikum. Assalam.
And I ask that, in today's time,
the are becoming very daring,
and they
are trying to,
self harm themselves,
to get joy.
So how can you advise and guide these
children
on the importance of value of life?
So, this is a very common thing. I
mean, I've done a talk, a dedicated talk
on suicide where they say,
men resort
or youth resort more while while girls are
more prone
and susceptible
to to to do certain things, to give
off the nature.
Very recently,
I dealt with someone who I considered to
be from a someone who who I would
least imagine resort to some drastic measures of
this nature.
And the individual was experiencing
serious low self esteem.
Serious low self esteem. And obviously, the usual
slit in the wrist and cutting things and
doing that type of things or writing suicide
notes or going on to websites and and
and and and and seeing things to to,
you know, do, like, harmful and lethal and
dangerous things. So generally, it's just like you
go medically and you say, you know what?
It's a persistent headache. You know, symptomatically, it's
a but there's an underlying condition. There's an
underlying condition and it's cyberbullying. It's a sense
of loneliness. Like I always say, you know,
solitude is wholesome. Loneliness is not wholesome. We
need to make a distinction between 2. People
need solitude, not loneliness. There are a lot
of the youth out there that are suffering
a complex.
I mean, some someone is of marriageable age.
You know what? Faith,
has it that the the knock is not
on the door as yet. Now sometimes this
person starts feeling challenged. Then you have,
the insensitive nature of society. How many sisters
have emailed? No.
I get the comment you're not marketing yourself
enough.
How more low can society be? You have
someone battling a particular
emotion hoping to settle like anybody would have
that aspiration
and then you go to a function and
somebody throws a nasty comment like this, say
you're not marketing yourself enough. And what would
that do to the emotions of that person?
Completely gutted and shattered, right? Now you feel
so depressed, so dejected,
somebody makes a nasty remark, it destroys your
self esteem. We need to be very cognizant
that we're boosting the self esteem of our
kids. And even when we're addressing them, if
we don't have the right language and the
right discipline, walk away. I say to youth,
you say, you know what? I don't wanna
visit my mother. I'm gonna have a blow
up there. I said, right. Don't visit. My
mother is gonna be upset that I didn't
go. I said, rather she's upset that you
didn't go, then you go there and you're
disrespectful.
I know if I'm gonna go by my
mother, me and my mother gonna have you
know what? She's gonna say words and I'm
gonna say paragraphs, and it's gonna be ugly.
Don't go.
So these are serious things, but what I've
observed that children who've lost the touch of
life, who've become despondent,
who just wanna throw life away, it's there's
a deeper reason. And,
we need to put our hand around them.
We need to meet with them. We need
to talk with them. We need this rapport.
We need this rapport where we can we
can we can talk. We need to talk.
Girl is eating 12, 13. Mommy needs to
have a frank open discussion with her. You're
becoming an adult, my girl. Boy is eating
12, 13. Dad needs to have an open
frank discussion. Take him together. Sit him out.
Go out for a meal and talk friend.
I had a youth conference in, Toronto
and then it was Ramadan.
After everything wrapped up, we said we're having
an exclusive q and a for the youth.
It was full mischief. Good 5, 600.
No action, no movement.
Again we said he said I gave my
talk. He said can the elders leave? Wallah,
as soon as the elders left
those youth kept me busy for 2 hours
till suhoor.
The questions were just firing up.
I've got this problem, I got that x
fantasy, I do these type of things, I
have to give pleasure to myself, I got
this So we have to be talking to
them.
So, I I,
I believe that them resorting to cutting their
wrists or being suicidal or making comments,
These are displays of low self esteem.
He was a person
the hadith
who lacked physical beauty.
So social standing, he didn't enjoy that prominence.
He was a person who didn't have all
that apparent looks.
So simple and he was even living hand
to mouth.
This is the hadith that speaks about it.
Generally,
society people would, you know, say, hey. What
happened to you? Your brother is so slim
in you?
Hey. Your brother is so clever. And you?
Hey. Your sister's married and you? No. I
mean, like, I've I've hopped on this. I've
hopped on this so many times
and my clips are out there that please
for heaven's sake if you can't heal don't
hurt.
And so Zayr would come and take his
stable and sell his vegetables.
Simple man
didn't have much physical beauty living hand to
mouth standing
there, and he would come outside the masjid
Masjid in Nabi and sell.
Nabi al Islam comes from the back,
puts his hand around his eyes,
casually interactive,
informal,
puts it around and blindfolds him. And he
says, hey, Zahir is selling this, I'm selling
Zahir.
Wow. This is Allah's Nabi.
This is Allah's Nabi.
Sadly, in our masjid so many times we
have people from neighboring African countries.
Never mind greet them. When they greet us,
we don't reply the greetings.
We don't reply the greetings. I've seen this
happening.
He greets you alone like, what's it?
Where where are we? Who are we? What
are
I'm
selling him. I'm selling him.
So
he feels the palms
and that's a giveaway because nobody else can
have such delicate and soft amazing palms.
So he gently moves the hand
and then he makes eye contact.
And then he says,
You're gonna sell me, but I'm so cheap.
I have no much value.
Nabi Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said
but in the eyes of Allah, you're the
most valuable.
One statement
from Allah's Nabi, what would it have done
to the self esteem of Zahir radiAllahu anhu?
How would it have elevated him? There's a
child in the class probably he's got a
bit of a slow learning.
He needs special attention. He needs a bit
of a you know help and assistance.
You as a teacher, I know it's a
challenge. I've been a teacher. It's not easy.
You have your own challenges. You have your
own dynamics. I'm saying, Apa, what you're saying
is great but for me that's symptomatic.
There is an under fever and there is
a current there that needs to be addressed
so that we don't have the display of
these symptoms.
Sorry. Parents are becoming more lenient in Okay.
I think there's a question there.
Yeah. I think we better wrap it up
now, Insha'Allah.
We'll do that and one more question.
So
I think I've indicated and I want to
reiterate
that,
it's guttering,
it's breaking homes
and it's hitting far and wide
until and unless
we don't consider the fall of my neighbor's
son to be my fault.
We we
we we we we we we're not moving
up to the speed with which this is
being unleashed upon us.
Until and unless we don't move together
to say what had happened. Hey, you know
what? This happened by my brother's son. I
I know myself personally of mothers
who've come to the rehab center
with their
cards
because they don't have funds. So we've got
some people that have come on board. May
Allah bless them. And we've worked with them
to say that, you know what, as soon
as there's a genuine case and he wants
to, have him admitted, we'll cover the entire
cost. Now we need society to mobilize.
I'm also speaking to few stakeholders.
When they come out, we need them integration.
They can't go into active work in force,
but they need to be brought back into
some space. You know what? Keep him here
for routine and discipline. I'll pay his salary
just so that he's got discipline because it's
more to help him to maintain discipline than
to get any work out of him. Because
just like a person comes out of accident
then he goes to a rehab center to
rehabilitate him, to get him back to walk.
It's gonna take time. But if you don't
get him into activity,
then you predispose him to a potential relapse.
So like I said, it takes 1 it
takes 20 people to help 1. This thing
has to be a much wider thing. And
I think we all know there isn't a
single family immediate or close by where there
isn't some member in some form or shape
or size who unfortunately hasn't been involved in
it. And now it's gone to the extent
that they're taking the codeine.
Codeine and Sprite.
That's that's the common thing. It's it's cough
mixture. Right? So you're taking your prescribed medications
at an abuse level. So it's not your
recreational
drug, it's your prescribed drug but it needs
an
abuse. So I think we've we've you know
what? The fire is guttering. The smoke inhalation
has killed so many people. The fire siren
is out. If we still can't get up
out of our slumber, then what will wake
us up?
Okay. Last question, I think.
Teens do not want to listen to
lectures. They are more inclined towards instant messaging
via WhatsApp and apps like TikTok, Instagram, etcetera
for their guidance and advices.
What proactive steps
can be taken as a community to address
this? Yeah. So I mean, of course, there
is definitely and this brings in the challenge
for scholars. You know what, to to to
come into that space or not because when
you come into that space to meet the
demands of that space then there is of
course a negative impact on you because it's
infringing on you. It's also giving off some
coloring on you as yourself going into that
space. So at one level, it is being
tackled because this is where
the battle has been fought and this is
where it is happening. That's the brutal truth
that everything is there. So of course there
is good,
info and material,
that is being presented on these platforms as
well. But
the the the the the harsh reality is
through the device
setting and scrolling is nothing but information.
The transmission of knowledge will never
change.
You have to sit in the traditional setting
when knowledge is transmitted,
Where richness is communicated.
Where values are communicated. That's why they could
read, you know what? I mean, you'll get
a message. Wow. Today I read something
brilliant. Wow. This is amazing.
And it inspires him for half an hour.
And then the battery cells are dead again.
The battery cells are dead. Right? So so
this,
constant need for gratification and addiction
to this phone and and and, you know,
somebody said we live in a strange world
before you had a diary and you kept
everything secret,
right? You kept the diary and the diary
kept you.
Post your death, that was your
your record.
Now it's so strange
that you throw everything out on social media
and you don't keep it secret. You get
offended
if people don't don't compliment you on it.
Before, hey, don't touch my diary. I don't
go in there. It is after my mort
you can read it. Hey, not now. It
was a private thing which was a confidential
thing and you kept it. Now the whole
world has just changed totally.
So this is a challenge. We need to
reach out to them. We need to have
I was in London recently.
There's this youth club, masha'Allah.
And of course our is doing great work
in this and he's made great strides and
alhamdulillah it's happening on many fronts. The Harari
launched recently a youth wing as well. They
invited me to speak on the trucking. They
had a similar set up and it was
very very well received, very well attended.
Same thing like this year, dealing with adolescent
kids, the challenges, how to navigate etcetera.
So I I think we are making the
the the the the impression and we are
making the mark, but the onslaught is too
heavy. Let me come back to that one
comment I made. I was saying about the
woman who said that if a child is
born and for 3 years you make an
impression on the subconscious mind of that child
to eat healthy food.
She says after 3 years,
exposure to the first bill board of fast
foods has wiped out 50%
of what you did in 3 years. This
wasn't my report. This was on a talk
show radio program.
She said for 3 years
you're making a subtle.
So, you know, I'm I'm, in tafsir uthmani
it is written,
in
in in chapter
11, somebody asked him that,
does
does,
wipe out your sins?
So he said,
Will Tawba wipe out your sins? Yes.
Provided
your detergent
and your soap is relative to the impurity.
So you know what? You got you got
you soiled
your entire body and you come in with
one drop of detergent
and you're trying to clean out. It's a
relative. It's not relative.
So I think where the youth are running,
we are making inroads. We're trying to reach
out. Sadly, unfortunately, we then have our own
internal bickerings
and other related challenges where, you know, we
we we we which kinda,
of creates a paralysis in our activities but
nonetheless we're trying to reach out but the
onslaught
is far more greater. I'll share this here
quickly reflection as well. There was a program
on a on a lottery on a radio
station as well. So,
this guy was challenged to say, you know
what? You guys promote and advocate the lottery.
You say if you play the lottery once,
your chances are good. If you play it
twice, your chances are stronger
which might be true but your chances are
still slim.
You tell the public, you know, play 3
times, you stand a better chance. But even
better is is is is relative. It's it's,
you know, it's like a one one day
old baby
and a 2 day old baby. So the
2 day old baby is bigger than the
1 day old but he's still small.
He's only he's bigger. He's elder. You know
the twins they say no I'm elder. I
was born 5 minutes before.
So it's still it's it's
it's it's still small within himself. He might
be bigger.
So they ask this person that you're having
this lottery and you're advocating it and you're
telling people you stand a better chance,
but you know there's no good chance 3
times or 4 times or 5 times. So
why are you lying to people? Open. You
know what?
Straight on.
He said, we know they won't win and
even they know they won't win but at
least we give people the opportunity to fantasize
being a millionaire.
What?
I'm like, did I hear you right?
That's the kind of lie and that's what's
thrown out there.
So we're giving you a chance to fantasize
on your dinner table to say, hey, what
if my numbers hit the jackpot? Imagine I
got this here. So at least we tickle
the fantasy of a pauper.
That's the world you know. So what I'm
saying is the onslaught is too big. The
counter is too small. You're taking probiotic to
restore good flora. How much probiotic No. No.
No. No. No. You got serious IBS. You
need to take much more. You're taking but
the volume is not right. The quantity is
not right.
I think I'm gonna hand over to Moran
Asidah to
continue with the program Insha'Allah.
I think we just
And I'm gonna ask some good few questions
are coming through via the link, but we're
not gonna get into any of that.
Inshallah, maybe at some other time. Just like
to extend the vote of things and say
to to
Hazrat Mufi Soleiman, Moolasa, Moolasa.
Really appreciate the time in addressing the pressing
issues.
To everyone that has, stayed till the end
of the program and those that are also
listening on air, as well as those that
are following us on, the YouTube via the
YouTube link. Uncle Baygora Badat,
uncle Mohammad Dokra, Jazak Mullahaira,
brother Rashad and his team yet in Yata
waiting in conference center,
for availing this facility, and all the support
with your team.
Aviz Imran Islam at CI Radio. Mullen Soleiman
Ravatsa from Radio Islam International.
Our sound master, uncle Ahmed Sirat.
Brother Ahmed Asma, by excellence.
The in educators from Roshni Islamic School and
Vidma for your support and your presence here
today. Have a as well for your presence
here.
The deco by sister Farzana and her team.
Karinaimsab
for
spearheading the program with Muftisab.
Brother Idris Hansa was here with us as
well. Brother Fayyaz Badat, RMW and all those
who supported and assisted us in the background.
To each one of you. There's a lot
that we're gonna take from the program Insha'Allah
and I think we need to listen to
it a second time and the third time
and the responses
to those questions and digest it and Insha'Allah
see how best wherever and however it affects
us to implement what doesn't Mufassa be shared
with us. Insha'Allah we request Mufassa to