Suhaib Webb – Imam Baji’s Advice To His Sons
AI: Summary ©
AI: Transcript ©
I feel like we should talk about fellow
stains, be honest with you so,
I'm tempted to just,
you know, do that but I wanna be
also respectful of the,
what was expected,
from the people. So we'll we'll stick
to,
the topics,
but, of course,
we we should appreciate history.
Gaza actually has an incredible history as we
lead into our discussion about al Badri, al
Mariki.
You know, Gaza, actually, its name is Hafazah
Hashim
Because Hashim ibn Abd al Manaf,
the grandfather of Sayyidina Bisa alaihi wa sallam,
he's buried in Vazza.
And if you read in Surah of Quresh,
those
business
journeys that the Meccans that he started, Hashem
started,
the journey to the north was to Gaza.
Like, that's where that was.
And so that's why today till now, his
grave is still there,
hopefully.
I don't know about now, but up until
a few days ago,
action is next to the Azhar of Gaza
where I graduated from in in Egypt.
Also, Imam al Shafi'i
is from Gaza. He said,
He wrote a poem about it. He said,
I missed
Like, after I left it, it deceived me.
Like, you know, when you leave something, then
you appreciate it. Like, oh, SubhanAllah. You know?
I miss that place.
He said, like, now I bless,
you know, this place of wazl. So sayin'
to Imam Shafi
he was from he was Wazawi, Auslan.
Imam ibn Hajra al Aspalani.
Aspalan is the old name for that area
of Palestine,
which is about 20 kilometers from Wasra.
But the whole place is called Aspalan,
and he was from there. And the prophet
in authentic hadith, he said the best hijrah
is the hijrah of Ibrahim
meaning
who migrates the way that Ibrahim did so.
We know that he migrated to an area
of Al Qadhan and specifically
Gaza.
That's why Imam Iba Samiyeh said that this
hadith shows that there is a virtue and
a blessing to Gaza.
Also in Gaza is Masjid al Amari, which
is the masjid that was built by Sayidina
Amr Abu Khattab
that was destroyed in the Crusades and then
rebuilt by the Turks.
Even Katheri says in that
there used to be, like, a lot of
crowded lessons
in Jamiri Al Amari, and he
named after Sayna Amar Abu Khattab
And also the prophet
he
said, the best place for a person to
stay consistent
in protecting the Muslims
is this area that we now know as
Gaza, this Hadith of Sahih.
That's why some like and also puts
that's why Sufian al Thawri
he went, and he lived there for 40
years 40 days, excuse me, just so he
could
be from the blessings of this hadith.
So he went there. So, like,
the great grandson of Zaydna Umar Zayd
Zaid
ibn Abdila ibn al-'Amr ibn al Fattab, he
died there,
and he died there in Rehbaat
in Gaza. He's buried in Gaza.
Ubared Naswamat,
the the great companion of the prophet, sallallahu
alaihi, he's buried next to Babur Rahma.
So, like, there is a lot of history
that is potentially going to be destroyed.
Right?
Most importantly, human beings' lives who are being
destroyed.
But history allows us to maintain an anchor
an anchor into a place.
And I can say that I was just
in Andalus. I went to Spain twice this
summer, one for academic,
conference and the other with my family.
So how do I like, will you see
where Muslims were? You still see the impact
of Islam, the khair that Muslims brought.
You feel the the greatness of Islam, the
potential of Islam.
So I say that because people ask me
who's Imam al Baji?
That's unfortunate
if we don't know who
Imam Al Baji is. Rahim of Allah. Imam
Al Baji is so important that even now
in Portugal, there's a city called Badja.
Out of everything that happened, the last inquisition
was 1742.
Like, it wasn't that long ago, the final
inquisition.
They have a monument
dedicated to him.
And Imam al Badri is one of the
great scholars
and judges and poets,
and Madiki jurist
from Spain,
or is now in Portugal.
And he was
most famous for his explanation, Al Luntaka'a of
the Muwata'a, which is almost like 20 volumes
ahead of it. And a book called Al
Ekam and Osulufik,
which is 2 braims. And then his debate
and this is important for us to think
about now against ibn Hazan.
As Imam ibn Hazem Rahim Abdulusi, he led
sort of an academic
revolt, and he was actually forced to move
to Mallorca.
And Al Begi, he met him in Mallorca,
and he debated him. Unfortunately, like, the
the script is lost.
But he defeated him. And he defeated, like,
this Wahidi sort of approach to Islam that
we see now kind of
taking
hold amongst especially, like, TikTok, Ox,
you know, and people like that. Al Baji
specifically
actually destroyed the madrassa of ibn Hasan
in his debates
with him.
He he respected him, and in fact, he
even has some he praised him, so it
wasn't like he banished him or censored him,
but it, like, exposed
the flaws
in the Duahedi argument.
Very similar in the last 75 years of
what Sheikh Mafaloufi did in Bolugul Watsoul
in his small book A Great Israel Scholar.
Again unpacking the ideas of Shulkani and Ibn
Hazm that have led to kind of the
Wahhabi sort of
way of looking at things, if you will.
So Imam al Baji, outside of that, also
he was a father.
And one of the treasures that he left
us that hasn't been translated, alhamdulillah, we translated
it as a mission that we run an
online school. We have like 500 youth also
all over the world in our online programs
as well as adult education that follows the
EZHAR system. But for everybody, we also teach,
You name
it. Arabic language,
for only $9.99
a month for your whole family.
And a free app and text. This is
one of the text that we will we
just finished translating,
and we hope to,
release it in the future. Usually, we send
out books once a month free
to our subscribers to use, especially homeschoolers. Right?
Homeschoolers, Islamic studies teachers. As he said, I
I my degree is elementary education, so, subhanAllah,
I signed up for a life of perennial
poverty.
You know, as an educator, we know how
that works.
And then I added more to that when
I became an imam,
So
I understand the need for resources, especially as
a parent. I have 4 children. I have
a 23 year old, a 20 year old,
a 4 year old, and a 1 year
old.
Yeah. Exactly. So I'm poor and I don't
sleep.
But I have been in that situation where
I had to teach in Islamic schools, and
there's, like, a lack of resources. We also
share lesson plans,
things like that, pedagogy for people trying to
teach their kids. The best hood is parenthood.
So we're gonna read from a very interesting
letter
that was saved, you know, in in in
in Granada.
There's a square called,
you know, the the slang of the Andalusians
if you speak Arabic,
is that after
they will mention Behat. That's why it's not
hamrah. They call it what?
Hambra. So their dialect, the Andalusian dialect, which
is preserved, we don't need AI to preserve
it,
Is that after a mim with, they have.
So
became what?
This is their Elijah.
Like in Egypt, you say,
Right? They have their own sort of slang.
So there's actually a place in Granada called
Meydan Rambla, still there today. That's where they
buried burned all the Muqtul Ta at Granada.
It took 3 days to burn all of
them.
Plus
somehow some of the historical legacy of Spain,
Andalucia
was saved, and from what was saved is
this letter
of al vegi al mariki to whom? To
his sons.
And it's very beautiful because now you see,
oftentimes,
we
create an image of scholars that doesn't allow
them to be human. So it is we
don't let them make mistakes.
But here you see, like, a very honest
letter
of a father to his sons
who's
to us the scholar,
but, like, when I go home, I'm not
Suhehweb. I'm Hani and Papa.
Right? That's that's who you are once you
close the door.
So we'll read through his letter
and take a few lessons from this, and,
in the future,
hopefully, it will be a benefit. We'll we'll
release it for free, like, so people can
use it. Inshallah, it says.
He says, my children, which is like a
beautiful way to speak to our our his
sons were adults. But in the Quran, if
you notice, you see when the prophets talk
to their children,
you know, you
You know? They use a term of endearment,
which is called
in Arabic, like
like Hussein.
Like, the only thing I can liken it
to in English is like
or like
You know, it's like that kind of meaning.
It's a term of endearment.
So he begins and he addresses his children,
showing his his love for them,
his investment in them. He says, my children,
may Allah guide both of you and enlighten
you and grant you success,
protect you, and bestow upon you the best
of this world. And these are the words
of a parent.
Right?
Who who we make dua for like this
is our kids.
And the hereafter, and shield you from the
perils
of just doing you with his mercy. So
one lesson, we we take 2 lessons from
this, number 1, and I've seen this in
20 something years now working in the Muslim
community,
that sometimes parents are too timid,
and we don't push in.
But oftentimes,
our children need guidance.
I talked to one
young Muslim, and he said, I wish my
father would have murdered me.
Like, I wish my father would have pushed
in and
gave me advice sometimes, what I needed. Sometimes
we're shy because we don't wanna we have
especially if you come from, like my wife's
Lebanese, Irani,
you don't wanna lose not only your religion
but your culture. Right? There's a lot at
stake.
A lot of pressure on us as parents
not to push our children too far away.
But what I appreciate about
and then even the prophets in the Quran
is they push into the relationship with their
children.
They perform.
One time a man, he came to me
and he said at the Islamic school,
my son sent a love letter to a
sister
in 2nd, 7th grade.
I said,
What did he say? He said he proposed
marriage
at 12,
And he said, what should I do now?
I said, be a foreigner.
Like, that's a true chance. Like, now,
it's very easy
to
perform as a parent when things go well,
just like it's easy to be a husband
or a wife when things work out.
But the true test of relationships are when
things are
they need to be navigated. They need to
be a little bit uncomfortable.
So with the greatest accomplishments of the sahaba
were when the arguments happened. Like the Quran
itself is the argument between Abu Bakr asay
and Amrul Khattab.
Some of the greatest efforts of the Sahaba
came like Surat Al Ahzab
when they had to face adversity.
So as a parent,
don't shy away from adversity.
Ask Allah to give you tawfiq and push
in
and be wise.
So he pushes in.
And I love the fact that
Al Badri was a busy person. He was
a party. If you go to Granada,
actually,
right at the front before you walk on,
like, the Arab street, you're gonna see this
massive structure. That was the place of Qadab.
Every Friday, the the people would come and
give rulings to people in.
Ibadji was in Portoba, so he was the
very busy person, but he still takes time
to push in to his son
his his 2 sons.
He didn't have any daughters. He only had
2 boys.
The second thing is he makes dua for
them. We should make a lot of dua
for our kids, man.
And I've seen this, subhanAllah, where nothing else
works but dua in my own life. SubhanAllah.
And 'Abdu'l Wahab al Sha'rani was a great
scholar from Egypt. If you're from Egypt there's
a gate called Bab al Sha'rani named after
him. The gate of Sha'arani.
And he laments in his,
memoirs how his son wasn't a good person.
And he was a sheikh Abdul Abu Abshayarari.
And then finally,
you know, later on, he says the problem
was I was saying I I I
I. And I forgot, walavu yokadeeru layla wanaar.
Allah is the one who's in control at
me.
So he said,
Like, I left my son to Allah and
then his son became better. So
never, like,
if you lose hope in your parenting,
don't lose hope in Allah. If
If you lose hope in your marriage, don't
lose hope in Allah. Ask to
make
So he makes dua for him, his children.
And this is a pattern in the Quran
saying that Ibrahim way before he is married,
way before he has kids. He says,
Make me one who prays and make my
family
those who establish salan.
Yeah. Sure, sir.
So
King. Thank you so much. Bishop.
So, like,
keep making du'afal then.
Ed Olai,
I remember there was a a black American
brother who went and took with
me,
and he had learned quite a bit about
Islam. He was a historian.
And he said to me, I am the
answer of my ancestors to us.
It was like I like I had to,
like, how long, man? I didn't think about
it. You know? He was like, because my
family were Muslim, and then then Islam was
taken from us.
And now I am the Joao of their
du'a.
Woman.
So never underestimate like the good you do,
the duas you make for your children.
That
will come.
He says when both of you reach the
age in which religious duties become incumbent upon
you, I actually believe that we need to
have shahada seminars for emergent adults in our
community,
and they do, like, a 2 or 3
week intensive in the summer, and then it
then they take shahada, even though they're boobs.
And we should do a shahada party for
them.
Because
what's happening is we don't reinforce
religious
responsibility.
Society
is furnishing for our young people what responsibility
is when you're 18 and you're 21.
Right?
Young men now are encouraged
to be very immature.
We love our boys and raise our daughters.
It's not healthy.
Why is this sad?
And I talk to young people that teach
online about this. Like, you're mokumdif, you're not
mokumdif.
Like, either you're responsible or you're not. You're
responsible
to or you're not.
So I love, again, how banshee
Their life as being now you have
entered a point where you are responsible for
how you live your life.
Not to
me, not to Mama, not to Baba, to
Allah
He says, so now that you've reached this
age of religious responsibility, it is incumbent upon
you and an obligation to fulfill the rights
of Allah,
You're a creator,
and I am assured that you both have
attained this level, like I know you. You're
ready for this moment.
It's very important in parenting
that you appreciate
what
we talk about in education
are
sort of moments of achievement.
You create a resume of moments of achievement
in the life of yourself and your kids.
So they have a historic resume
on being with you. So, like, you went
from this to this. This that's why we're
we're school with our parents. Our parents took
us to school. We'll never forget
it. Or our caregivers took us to school.
They did this. They did this. They did
this.
So I bet you say, now I know
you, and now you're moving on into, like,
the next part of the journey.
And the next part of the journey is
adulthood, and adulthood comes with responsibility.
He says, I am aware that you have
the ability to comprehend reminders
and to discern what is right and wrong.
You have the ability to moralize.
One thing that he does that's very important
is he
amplifies
their sense
of agency.
Sometimes as parents, we don't do a good
job on this. We
kinda mute our children's agency because it's safer
for us to be parents that way.
Whereas Islam actually encourages us to
encourage and amplify agencies so that person can
be confident enough not to be a slave
to dunya.
Like, to be a slave to Allah, to
be a servant to Allah
needs confidence.
You've got to be confident if you're a
high school kid in America. Right? If you're
a Palestinian kid in America right now, you're
going to have some swagger to you.
Or you have to be able to push
in with.
Quran
says push into Bismar.
So while he's talking to his children, he's
also
noting
that ultimately they are responsible for themselves.
And they have now reached this point where
they have to take
charge of their lives.
I can't tell you how many Muslim parents
I've seen
teach
treat their 30 year olds like they're 13.
You're creating
a big freaking
baby problem.
For where were they married.
And and sometimes we can over parent.
What does it mean that we've over parent?
We parent to the point that we don't
parent failure.
We should parent failure.
Fail right. My son asked, Lord, if I
can get it wrong. I said, you get
it wrong right?
Because failure teaches you. I asked my teacher,
well, I was memorizing the Quran. How did
you memorize the Quran so well? They said,
I forgot it well.
There there's a motivation to failure.
So I like to tell Muslim parents be
sort of a
a wall that they don't feel.
What if they make a mistake? Somewhat.
They're not. And beyond.
And if you don't and I don't teach
our children the emotional
toolbox needed for failure,
we're not creating a whole child. We're not
creating a whole adult.
Someone that appreciates the layers of nuances of
life.
So he amplifies
their autonomy
while locating himself not as a supervisor, but
Also, what happens when we over parent is
that when God protect our young people, if
they fail as adults, then we blame ourselves
because we we overplayed it.
So now we are intrinsically
lead to the failure.
Whereas we shouldn't teach not only to be
successful,
but to fail.
But fail. Right?
Take some risks.
I have a friend. He sold his company
for $1,800,000,000.
He's a Muslim 2 years ago.
Practice, hon.
And I asked him, what type of people
do you hire? He says people who are
not afraid to fail.
Because that's how I learned a lot about
life.
Not encouraging us to run into failure, we're
talking about failure as the organic outcome of
hard work and things just didn't work out.
Then he says, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, and
he says, I felt it incumbent upon me
to present to you advice and to make
my words clear to you.
This is out of fear that I may
be overtaken by death. He was old now.
So the bad genes, his time was entering
the last phases of life,
so he wants to take advantage of the
time and advise his children.
And this is actually something that we noticed
amongst our early scholars. They married late. Imam
Ahmed Mabry when he was 15.
He said, like, I dedicated my whole life
to learning
until I was 15. Shep Mohammad al Hassan
de Dindo, our teacher, I asked him, Montan,
like, how long are you gonna learn? He
said, oh, I'm 50.
Although he had already had children. The point
is, oftentimes, we find with the early scholars,
they actually dedicated
probably 2 thirds of their life to learning,
and then they got married, had kids, so
they had kids and they were older.
So he says, like, I worry that I
may be leaving this dunya,
and in doing so, I want to impart
to you both
necessary teachings, training, guidance, and understanding.
What a lever,
and what a way to
push in as a parent.
It makes do I extend my life and
get grant us all enlightenment and understanding and
know that success is only from Allah.
Says, but in what I anticipate
occurs,
that the end of my life is near,
and I have no more hope to live
in this world,
and that comes between us,
then it is in this that I draft
to you and I compose to you
a methodology
of our righteous ancestors
that will make you profitable
in this world
and
the
next.
He said, I entrust
Allah with your faith
and worldly affairs,
and I ask him to safeguard your present
and future.
And I delegate to him all your situations.
He is sufficient for me and you both.
What a what? The language again. If you're
a father or a mother,
you feel it. The out of me actually
is very beautiful, but I'll just read it
in English for a time.
Then listen to what he says if you're
a parent. Very beautiful.
Know that no one advises you more sincerely.
That's why you don't talk to him. You
will not try so crazy.
And I want children to listen to me.
It's not easy to pairing.
I have 4 children. Right? So my the
latest firmware update
was born a year ago.
So I thought,
you know, Sabado Lab. 3 kids. Like, this
is gonna be easy.
Well, like, this new
SuiE
2.4
is a unique rocketship shooting through the universe
that I have no idea how to deal
with. Lena. Her name's Lena. I said, Lena,
takulena, without a rina.
If you speak Arabic, Lena means 4. That's
a letter means like insta. Don't be a
letter. Be a letter.
Right?
And I realized, like,
I know that I think about this.
And this is the 4th.
So young teenagers in particular, sometimes you want
us to understand you. You need to understand
us to
especially
as parents, we worry about things that you
don't necessarily understand yet.
That's just the reality of being a parent.
We think when we're younger, when we get
older, life becomes easier. But as we get
older, what happens? Our responsibilities
dilate.
You know, my father died 2 months ago,
and I got a phone call. My father
is not Muslim.
From his attorney that said he left you
in charge of his whole estate because you're
Muslim.
I was like, what? What?
Like, I trust you even though you're a
Christian. You want a bad Christian? Don't worry.
I was like, oh, what? How do you
you know? They go on on team Shahada,
Crescent the Crescent Society of Oklahoma. But they're
like because you're Muslim he knows
you'll, like, you'll handle things correctly.
So, then suddenly I'm like, my responsibility
I have kids and I have to take
care of my father. Oh. Right? So, as
we get older,
teens,
you have to appreciate the fact that your
parents also are insecure. Your parents also are
worried. We don't necessarily know if we're doing
a good job parenting.
And so, one of the things you can
do it is push into your parents and
say like, you're doing a good job. I
love you. You know, any parent will tell
you, when your child comes and just, like,
gives you a massage on your shoulder, you're
good for, like, next quarter.
Right. That quarter is good.
If your child says something kind to you,
it takes you through the week in a
different way.
So just as you and your teens need
validation
and
advocacy,
your parents did it too.
It's very important.
So Adebayji says,
there is no one who can advise you
more, Cecilia, than me,
and no one is more compassionate in his
love to you than me.
There's no one on earth whom I'd be
pleased to see surpass me and outperform me
and both of you.
And I don't regard anyone higher in religious
and whirling matters
than you.
Centers
his children.
Do we act this way?
My wife and I have a rule. We
go home, we leave our phone at the
front door.
It's hard, man. Try it, soar.
Life is
hard. Till they go to sleep.
And then you wanna schedule moments. So we
have, like, cozy time. What's cozy time?
Thirty lives before bed, we all get together,
turn down the light. I can't do candles
till my 1 year old freaking lizard of
mine thinks she's at a rave.
Like, you know, with Charlie Kendall for her
to be calm, she's like,
you know, shit. They're rolling. And Mariel was
like, stop. She's the thing in her mind.
So we had to turn on the lights
to keep her to go to sleep. Told
her she's a unique unique rocket going through
the state space and light speed. But we
schedule moments of attention.
So you want to schedule moments of attention
as a family
for each other. Not just for the children.
For you too.
You need it also.
So here we see al Badri. He centers
things
around his children.
He gives that moment. That's why it's called
present. It's a gift. Are you in your
present?
He says, and here's the first thing, know
that we as a family have always been
raised with virtue. What he does, I I
don't have time to go through it. He
he lists all of their family members who
were known to be
Auri'afin, Olamah,
So'alehin,
And this is very important for you in
America. Right? Like, my wife is from Ahenabeitrosul,
Ariesana.
Like, I told my kids, like, you're from
Dasha'anov.
Not out of arrogance, but it's very important.
I said earlier to construct meaning. That's That's
why one of the views, the modid is
important.
It allows us to construct the connection to
the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam. That's very important.
Whether you like it or not, that's fine.
But I'm saying for those of us who
advocate for it, one of the especially those
of us who became Muslim, because my family
are dirt farmers from Oklahoma. They go back
to Ireland, they're potato farmer. There's not a
lot of world ending Islamic history in that.
Right? But,
well, I tell my kids you're from the
Ashraf on your mother's side,
and
we
honor the family of the prophet
You have to think about creating meaning and
even mystery
in your children.
And that's why when you talk maybe some
like Anjed or others, how important is to
go back to where your family is from?
How how meaningful it is to pass by
the sajid that your grandparents used to pray
in or that some great grandfather built or
there was some uncle there who taught?
That stuff builds a meaning.
Why the processor wouldn't be sent to the
desert? Not just for language,
to connect to his source.
So Apache goes to this very long description
about who their family is,
so they can understand that your past
definitely leads to your future. So if you
know of great people in your family, you
should tell orally, actually, those stories to your
children.
What that means.
When I started to talk about the oral
history of Vazda, all of you listen.
Because, like, it it brings needing doubt to
the situation.
It brings, a spice.
There's salt on it.
Right? It brings it up to life. That's
why Allah says
These stories we tell you, Muhammad alayhi salam,
about those prophets has meant to strengthen you,
to give you resolve.
Junaid used
to
say, The stories of the righteous are.
That's why in classical system of study education,
one of the things we teach are the
lives of the righteous.
The Muslims, well, why was Hudhavo so popular?
It's not even a true story. Not on
TV, but we all liked it.
Why? Because it gave us a hero. It
gave us meaning. People start buying the hat.
Wear little Urto hats everywhere. The guy did
the tour of America, the actor.
He's like, people call me, he tell me.
People call me Urto. It's like my real
name.
I think I'm that person. Right?
So, the power of narrative.
What your family's name
is very important. My 4 year old, she
says to me, I wouldn't go to Oklahoma.
I'm like, girl, you're not an Oklahoma.
Why? Because that's
my family.
She knows her Jintu. She knows her Grandfather
from Lebanon. Right? But she doesn't know grandpa
and grandma. So she said, I wanna go
to Olam because that creates narrative.
We see now in young generations,
Palestinians,
young, little Palestinians,
very passionate right now, leading 120,000
people in the UK yesterday. 50, 60,000 people,
my my nieces in DC,
tied into this because that is their historical.
No. No. We appreciate that.
And so then he says after mentioning some
of the righteous people from their families,
that feels now that I am about to
follow in their footsteps, begin reminding them of
his mortality.
Has a great state that I saw with
my last 2 kids.
And that is he said, your children should
be raised by you and by their grandparents.
I always thought that was a strange statement.
So people ask him why. He said, because
your grandparents teach you how to die.
Your parents teach you how to live.
We see your badge now, reminding them, listen.
I'm not always gonna be here for you.
Unfortunately,
So I hope that you will continue the
legacy of your family. I've seen the barakah
of this in strange ways. I received a
phone call one time from a young woman,
actually a Instagram message. You can always tell
it is a non Muslim because it's like,
hi. You know, it's not like,
you know, it's none of that. It's just
like, hello, mister
Webb. You know, stuff like that. Right?
So 3 years ago,
2nd or 3rd day before Ramadan, I received
a message from a a young woman, a
teenager,
who's mister Webb. Hello?
And,
she's like, I really need to talk to
you. I said, sure. She made an appointment
with the office and got on the phone
with her, and she was telling me that
she was adopted.
She wasn't sure where she was from,
but that she kept seeing the prophet in
her dream, like, 30 times.
She asked, is it is it important if
you see Muhammad, peace be upon him, in
your dreams? Like, who are you? And actually
because it happened like 30 times.
30 times?
And so then I said, describe him, and
she described him in a light. It was
like I was reading the Shama'il.
Like the way she she described him perfectly.
So then I said to her, like, who
are you? You know? She's like, well, in
the dream the prophet peace be upon him,
hunts me, holds me close to him. Is
that banned? That's okay. Don't worry. There's no
Halal El Faram of dreams.
And so she said, I'm adopted, but I
have a piece of paper that is rumored
to be in my lineage. But it's in
a language that I don't recognize, and it's
written, left to
right.
So it was her shajalatua,
her family tree in Arabic. And she's Hasseini.
She's from the Imam Hussain's family. She was
from the Ashraf.
She was from the family of the prophet
sallallahu alaihi wasallam. She had been adopted.
So I said to her, I know what
your dream means now.
So I said, if your physical family left
you, your grandfather came back to get
you.
And she took sha'at.
Like, don't underestimate the power of your ancestors,
man.
The barakah. And we know that our ancestors
in Surat al Zumr, the souls of our
ancestors and us we can meet in dreams.
The prophet
said that the the people in the Barzaf,
they actually ask about us to people who
die. The authentic hadith of nisai, they asked
the people about their ancestors.
And authentic hadith also we know that the
people in the grave, when we go visit
graves, they can hear us.
So our relationship with our ancestors is not
one that they just die.
But, alhamdulillah, there is another realm that we
may meet them like, for example, in our
dreams.
He said, so the first thing I want
to advise you after this is the advice
of Ya'akov
to hisselves.
What are you gonna worship after Angkor?
We think about generational wealth. We should also
think about generational spirituality.
Generationally, human.
How do we
That my children will inherit from me and
my deen. How are they going to inherit,
this deen from us? Number 1, we worship
together as a family. Praying together, man. I've
seen a difference in families that pray together.
Not all the time. Got things going on,
of course. But I'm saying at least
because what you're doing is you're scheduling attention.
It goes back to what I talked about
earlier.
You're you're deliberately pushing into family.
So praying together.
I actually prefer, me, I don't like to
go to iftars at the masjid because I
have no time for myself.
Honestly.
I'll be honest about it. When you see
imams and teachers coming to the lessons, sometimes
you don't have to
crowd them. Like give them space, man. You
know? So my wife and I actually don't,
in Ramadan, do a lot of al iftar,
go places. We do a few
But primarily,
because I travel a lot as well, we
try to fit
deliberately make sure we do the family iftar.
It's very important and so forth. If you
think about how Islam structures these acts of
worship, they're very it's a great way to
buttress your family time.
Making du'a together once to week like the
last hour
on Jum'ah
before Mubarew. Bring du'a together as a family
sometimes.
Have a weekly gathering of du'a. Have a
repeat weekly gathering of salawat if you can.
If you do it, they do it. If
you theorize it, they don't do it.
That's why the prophet is Quran not
Quran Prophet is the living Quran, not the
talking Quran.
So how do we extend generational
spirituality,
and we don't outsource it to others?
And not only do we do, like I
just met Amjad, like he's playing ball, his
daughter plays ball, like we do things together.
You know? Like, we spend time together
in in different situations.
And the second advice he said I have
for you is the advice of.
Said to his sons, the ultimate shirk.
He says, I emphasize this both to you
with incredible anticipation,
hoping that you will have an attachment
and adherence
to Allah.
Like you connect to Allah.
So
because
we're not connected to Allah, we'll be losers
as the verse says in the hereafter.
And
if you die upon this way that Allah
has chosen and avoid what he has prohibited,
I hope we will meet each other.
And this is
Those who died
and their children follow them in iman
and will break them together
in the hereat.
So his love for his children is not
only regulated to this world,
but I hope to see you again.
That's why sometimes, you know, years ago, people
bombed to think it was Da'esh,
an orphanage in Afghanistan of Sawan,
Ta'ida.
Criminals.
And I collected all that hadith about children
who died, and now we've seen Gaza.
Is murderers killing infants.
You know, there are hadith of the prophet
that said, any child that dies in infancy
or a child that dies before birth
will refuse to enter paradise until his or
her parents enter paradise.
Say, I'm not going in until they come.
For women that have miscarried,
the prophet
said that that child will drag the mother
into Jannah
as she struggled to keep the child from
being dragged from her womb.
The prophet
he mentioned numerous narrations
about children that will be reunited,
alhamdulillah,
with their families.
So Al Baaji says,
I want to see you again.
Again, it's in part giving me a sense
of legacy.
Not just a legacy that's rooted in
wealth
and power,
but a legacy that's linked to the hereafter.
It's very important that we do that. You
know, the founder of Javat,
Tablir, Mohammed Imlis How
did he become How did he become Say,
how did he become
that person?
Actually, he was born and he was very
sickly as a child,
and he struggled with his weight. He's very
very
fragile.
And his grandmother
was a Aylianite,
Abydo.
And she would see him and say, when
I see you, I smell
the fray the fragrance of the Sahara.
It's Pamela then.
And then when he went
to study
in in Delhi
and he entered the madrasa,
1 of the teachers were teaching, and he
turned to him and said he never met
him before in his life. He said,
I smell the fragrance of Sayidina Umar.
That's how he became
Mawladi Yudis.
When Madik met Yahya for the first time
and he said to Yahia, what's your name?
He said Yahia. Yahia was always 16.
He said to him, become a scholar.
He didn't he didn't disintegrate his ambition,
amplified his ambition.
So here al Badri is saying,
I will see you again.
I hope that we see each other,
with Allah.
And thus, we would be reunited with your
believing ancestors,
nor would the righteous amongst your forefathers
at that time be able to help you.
Like, the only thing that's gonna help that
happen is you do what you need to
do. I do what I need to do
with Allah.
He says, My advice to you is divided
into 2 parts. Is everybody okay? It's not
too boring?
So making sure I can't see after 5
feet, so you have to forgive me.
He said my advice is divided into 2
parts, and we'll keep it short because of
time. First, our Sharia obligation.
We should teach our children like
we teach them. What are your what is
it? Because Islam is intrinsically late to me,
human. That's why Allah says,
But he calls us because the the epitome
of being a human being is being Muslim.
Now we see what's happening, and we're all
upset. You ought to realize through
this horrible
colonial genocide that we're watching, it's actually all
morally superior to other people. And I don't
mean that in a,
like,
a patronizing way. Like, we expect people to
be like us.
Somehow, we're from a woda woda woda woda
woda woda woda woda woda woda woda woda
woda woda woda woda woda woda woda woda
woda woda woda woda woda woda woda woda
woda woda woda woda woda woda wadwala we're
from the ancestors of Islam, Alaihi's Halim. He's
forgiving.
He's patient. He's loving.
So Muslims were shocked like you guys are
arguing about killing babies?
That's insanity.
But I realized something. As someone who was
a Muslim and became Muslim,
we think from a very, very high
moral calculus. It's a naman.
And we've been beaten up so much that
we forgot about this stuff. But now we're
seeing
things that we're witnessing.
No was some blow allowed this to happen.
I had a friend one time, his name
is Ruq'al'alam.
What a day, he felt, from Bangladesh.
And Ruf Al Alam
designed the PS 2
back in the days that
that,
label. He designed it for Sony. He's like
a very hit person at that time. Like
he didn't look like he was Muslim The
way he dressed, carry yourself. He went to
Cooks in the nineties.
He told me I went to Mashil Aqsaq
and I was praying there, this Palestinian man,
he said,
Come with me. He said I got scared,
you know. The first time you meet Arabs
in the Arab world is very scary because
they're so loving,
You're scared because their moral compass is so
high.
In Pakistan to I made up as one
man I was studying memorizing Quran. This Pashtul
man he grabbed me, I thought he kidnapped
me. And he took me to this brick
hut.
And he was like, dude,
and I was like, what? He was like,
carry on. Then he started making, dude,
on the fire?
And then he is like, this is an
honor to serve Gaur Sahib. I was like,
what's I figured out what Gaur Sahib mean
quick, like white boy. I know.
But, like, I thought I was about to
turn up on the nightly news, man. Because
we have Jeffrey Dahmer here. You don't have
that in the Muslim world.
You have serial killers in the US. So
we have serial lovers.
I, one time, flying from Cairo
to Bahrain,
Me and one person all day.
It's like 2 people on the flight. And
I had the Nazar Al Farron, and I
had no money. The brothers invited me to
Bahrain. I was like, you gotta meet me
in the airport. I have
nothing in my bank account.
If you're not at the airport, I'm Scott
Obalahee brother. It's a conference. We're gonna be
there. Hamdullah, peace abiditan. Of course, they didn't
show up.
So, I'm standing out in front of the
airport in Madaba at 1 AM. And that
Egyptian guy drives by.
The one that was on the plane with
me, Ahmed. He's like,
He's like,
why you live by yourself? And he said,
because the brother's like here.
He pump me in his car.
He's like, you gonna come I started getting
scared. Why would straight white American, no salt
on nothing?
I was like, oh my god, he's gonna
keep that. I'm gonna die. He's gonna do
something to me. I'm not gonna see a
little see like this, you know. Because
we think in America, largely the moral especially
the moral calculus is one of fear and
intimidation so people are morally
suspect a lot of times.
Most of the moral of the calculus is
like love,
care.
We forgot this because we've been getting
pounded, man.
They wanna pound the virtue out of us,
but they can't swallow.
So that brother, I spent the night at
his house. Next morning he made food, of
course.
And we're sitting there. He started crying. He's
like, my great grandfather was as high as
you like you.
And I was like, do I need to
pay you? Like, you know, always stay at
night and it's like so straight. He's like,
this is redemptoraitullah.
You know shing shing. And
we became friends. So that brother Ruhad Adam,
that guy took him from Cooks, took him
to his house,
served him tea,
brought him, you know, some matluba or whatever,
qunafa.
And then he said,
I need to go make mudu
and listen to what the Palestinian brother said
to him.
You're Muslim.
She didn't think he was Muslim, and still
he treated him like that man.
We are a community of high virtue, but
we demand justice. We forgot about that part.
So now we see what's happening in the
world. We hurt
because we actually have a very high our
prophet was sent to what
We are the embodiment of prophetic morality. We
are, as doctor said,
the last vestiges of prophetic
on the face of a famine to earth
when it comes to ethics and morality.
So Al Baji,
Rahim Abu Allah says the first thing I
need to teach you are Sharia obligations. We
shouldn't teach our children the Sharia obligation. The
best person to teach your child how to
pray is you. You know what I do
with my kids? I'm not a great parent,
by the way. I'm I have my brother.
But I
purposely make sure I teach them how to
pray. I make that a a freaking
field trip, man.
My daughters and my boys.
My son, his name is
he's named after Malcolm. When I lived in
Egypt, I took him to that Masjid where
Malcolm prays, famous picture, and I taught him
to pray at that spot. And I said,
this is what I named you after. And
I showed him the picture, and he started
crying. He said, why you live at?
I said, this is who you're named after.
Now I explained to him who Madakah Shabaz
was.
Again, creating resumes of meaning
is important.
It's narrated that the prophet
said he said to his sons of him,
I'll lead you with 2 things. And then
iman al Badri goes through
the Sharia obligations,
acts of faith acts of faith, acts of
worship,
and character.
And then he finishes by talking about
the Sahaba
and the righteous,
and respecting with them and respecting elders,
and being a person of character, and zakah
and cherry
and Ramadan.
The last thing I'm skimping, it's a lot.
We won't have time to go through all
of it,
is he talks about learning. We are a
community of learning.
SubhanAllah.
The word illud appears in one of the
Quran than any other word in its derivatives.
So he finishes
by talking about living a life of learning
and spending
your time in gross to the education.
Doesn't mean to learn scholarship. At my school,
we tell people, you're not here to become
a scholar. You're here to be functional.
We need functional or just literacy,
not dysfunctional attempts at scholarship.
And so he talks about how knowledge is
a means to a goal, and that goal,
as Imam Al Ghazari says, is to to
worship
and to be connected to Allah.
Knowledge in the in our epistemology
and nomenclature is not just cognition.
It's living.
So Ibn Abbas, when he was asked what
is knowledge, he said to be referent.
And then he talks about what to learn,
and he goes through some details on that,
and then he finishes because an hour
is up mentioning to them how he actually
traveled. Like, I bet you went to Baghdad.
From Andalusia to Baghdad, that's quite a journey.
And he mentions some of his trials and
efforts, challenges and struggles
to achieve
knowledge.
And we live in a society now that
honestly rewards and celebrates
and lauds
stupidity.
The more dumb you are, the more exhibitionist
you are,
the more you reward it. We see it
now.
Whereas
Islam
locates
our value on being
knowledgeable
and practitioners of the knowledge.
To be knowledgeable and not to be a
practitioner of it is moktobeearehim.
To practice without knowledge of the body,
to learn and to practice is an amta'idih.
So he
finishes.
Then he gets into some issues of aflak,
immorality,
sexual deviancy.
Then he talks about the dangers of shaitan.
And finally, he says to them that you
have to seek what is lawful.
We're a community. This is what I worry
about the influencer era. We have never been
a community
that chases fame.
We are a community that chases virtue.
That's very indifferent.
Run after what's good.
I was with a brother a few weeks
ago. Haven't seen him in a long time.
We're sitting together at a restaurant. He keeps
looking at his fold, like, a lot, you
know?
So I said to him, hey, man. Is
family okay?
He's like, oh, no. I posted the sandwich.
We'll make sure people like it.
Like, so you're just like, counting the likes?
Like, I haven't seen you, like, 6 years.
I don't like you.
I'm I'm about to post a book. I
don't like him.
Right? I I was tempted to do it,
by the way. He keeps looking. I was
like, I do not like you, the guy
in front of him.
Right?
But, unfortunately, because of how it's commodified, Facebook
sent me a message last summer.
Magic of a 30 year old kid that's
had this. They
sent me a message that said, if you
post
this many times,
in the next 3 months, we will give
you $30,000.
I need $30,000
for Rio. I got kids in college that'll
buy some books.
So then I said to my wife,
the number of times I have to post
would make it impossible
for me to actually think and filter through
the the content. Like I would just have
to post it.
So I'm uncensored. I'm unethical.
I'm just dumping stuff out there like crazy.
Right? I'm commodified to commodified to influencer.
And sheafis
saying here something very important to his children,
seek what is virtuous.
Don't seek attention.
Don't chase after fame.
Chase after virtue.
That will lead to success.
Then he says, and make sure that your
income is halau,
and that what you spend
is halau,
and avoid the doubtful.
And beware of oppressing anyone
because it will come back to haunt you
in the year after.
The oppressor is blamed by creation
and detested by the by creatures.
Shun situations
of disgrace.
Whether you both dread to be associated with
it,
you should avoid it.
And finally, he says, again
because of time, be careful with leisure.
Right now,
we had a webinarized the Quran. There was
this one brother who would always make, like,
catastrophic mistakes.
The catastrophic mistake is the first verse.
Our teachers say, if you make a first
our we're a generation of Z so forgive
me a little bit different error. A little
tougher. But used to say, if you make
a mistake in the first verse, leave.
Go
because we Like I didn't expect the first
verse.
Right? So
consequently we always would make him stay because
we're scared in the real birds. Right?
But this guy like consistently.
And so finally the Sheikh he said to
him, Sheikh Ahmed from Salazar,
brother, why why are you always making mistakes?
He said, Sheikh, I've been chilling.
Sheikh said, you're gonna chill till you thaw
in
*. It's tough statement, but he didn't forget
the law.
After that, he
he was down. After that,
No mistakes.
No mistakes. No mistakes.
Sometimes we need to be
checked. So the sheikh, he he spent some
time on things
like wasting your time on games and chess
and dice,
music, plants.
Doesn't mean that these things are bad. What
it means is that they take you away
from what you need to be ultimately
the primary responsibilities.
Those things are important too. Don't give it
your all. But they need to be disciplined.
I have a friend of mine. He's 46
years old. He's not married, never been married,
no offense to anyone.
But this is a unique person. He still
lives at home with his parents,
And he always complains to me about Muslim
limit.
These Muslim women, there's no Muslim good Muslim
women out there.
Right? So I said to him, hey, man.
How do you spend your day?
He told me I spent
7 hours a day playing video games.
I said, you don't need to be blaming
with someone, man. You need to be blaming
PlayStation 2, bruh.
Like, 7 hours?
And this
nice guy,
I said, why don't you take some of
those hours to try to put yourself in
a position to find
and build a family?
Sheikh is saying, yeah, when he's talking about
this, he means we have to be careful
with our young people,
that leisure certainly is a reward, but it
needs to be disciplined because it will take
over
and remove
what's
our priority.
That's what he's getting at here.
And then he finishes
because of time,
and he says,
you know, I
I have delivered this message to you,
and I ask Allah
to take care of you.
We just won't have time to finish it
all.
Again, he said I run an online school.
If you're interested, it's like $9 a month,
man. It's like 2 frappuccinos.
You support the zombie scholarship. You you support
our ability to work on texts like this
to bring them to the community, but also
that we bring a lot of good. And
then we have a lot of young people,
who go out through really significant challenges. We
have been a psychiatrist there who
can help,
have a pedagogy that's important and it's a
great supplement to
your on the ground Islamic kind of studies.
That's
like, we try to make sure all of
our teachers have a background in education and
Islamic studies.
So if you visit join or just visit
my website, swayabook.com,
I appreciate anyone that wants to sign up.
I have some cards. I forgot to bring
them. I don't know if I could pass
them out, but that has the, borrow code
in my bag. But if you're interested, you
can it's in my bag. If you just
open it, you'll see just don't look at
anything that I don't want you to see.
Joking. I think other than that, if there's
any questions or comments,
I'll turn it over to Kesemel Sock
about a close sheet.