Shadee Elmasry – Mothers’ Hour, Being Mom 13 (1112 missing)

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			Alright, so are they gonna have
our ketchup?
		

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			Okay, so inshallah we're gonna
continue today today is going to
		

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			be the final lecture, having to do
with starting with mutual, we're
		

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			going to be continuing with sister
Janet. And if you guys got my
		

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			message today in the last week of
May and into June Inshallah, and
		

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			I'll agree with you on a time. So
what have we been looking at in
		

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			the last couple of sessions, we've
been looking at a builder dealing
		

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			with very sophisticated living
beings, right? Children, children
		

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			who are not always very rational,
rational, or reasonable in their
		

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			behavior, or attitude, or in their
questions and queries. Sometimes
		

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			kids are just, they don't make
sense in everything, anything that
		

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			they do, right. And above all,
this, the soldier is not just
		

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			assigned to talk or to deal with
his children. But he's appointed
		

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			to build a nation, a community, a
society, and a building an entire
		

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			humanity. This filter is not just
dealing with us, but he's also
		

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			dealing with what with the unseen,
but why he's dealing with the jinn
		

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			he's doing and communicating with
what beings from heaven to angels,
		

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			he's receiving revelation, he goes
to Israel on Mirage, he goes to
		

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			heaven and even sees health, but
yet he has the time to talk to
		

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			children, yet he has the time to
address their concerns. Even if
		

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			there were minor concerns as minor
as what a dying pet, as we said,
		

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			in the industry before innovate.
And this culture is not Hasting
		

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			things, this builder is building
blocks and said the first block
		

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			was the block of emotions, and the
block of love the block of mercy,
		

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			the block of building a bridge
that could be later used to build
		

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			other blocks on top of so this
bridge of emotions, love and mercy
		

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			between the child and the parent,
or the Prophet Muhammad. So Salem,
		

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			or the builder is going to
transfer the other blocks. Okay,
		

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			so we said the base was the
emotions, the first thing was the
		

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			emotions, okay, and if the block
of our creed and as if the block
		

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			of our Creator is heavy, which it
really is, and if the bridge is
		

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			weak, can you imagine if the
bridge of emotions between you and
		

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			your child is weak, and you try to
build up as an Arpita, what's
		

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			going to happen, the block will
collapse, or will fall into a
		

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			river below. If the bridge of
emotions is weak, the block of
		

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			data or worshipping will not
sustain itself. And the children
		

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			will pray for a while, or they
will pray when you're observing
		

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			him or her as a child as a parent.
But when you're you know, or he or
		

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			she's out of your sight, he'll
have other things that he wants to
		

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			do nothing to do with Iboga.
		

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			Because the Prophet Muhammad
Faisal, and spent a lot of time to
		

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			build that bridge, okay, today,
we're going to talk about the next
		

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			block in our building, and
unfortunately, gonna be the last
		

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			one for today. I wish we could
continue some more. Okay, hoping
		

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			that our kids will reach that
level that we aspire for them. And
		

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			they will continue the process of
building with their children we
		

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			built with them and they continue
to take that on to the next
		

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			generation. Today. It's
unfortunate nowadays, that we have
		

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			to sometimes demolish entire
buildings to build brand new ones.
		

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			You see how kids are you see even
how men or women are raised, and
		

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			you feel like you how are you
going to change this person? You
		

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			have to demolish the whole
building and start rebuilding from
		

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			scratch again, it's double the
effort. And that's why the Prophet
		

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			Muhammad Salim says in the Hadith,
I miss my beloved ones. And the
		

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			companion says, aren't we say they
say, What aren't you your beloved
		

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			ones here, rasool Allah. He said,
No, you are my companions. You are
		

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			my friends as hobby, but I am
missing there be my beloved ones.
		

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			They said who are other that your
Rasulillah they said who are also
		

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			So who are your beloved ones? Yasu
Allah. So do you know who they
		

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			are? Okay, it's you. You are the
beloved ones. If the Prophet
		

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			Muhammad sai Salim were to see you
today, he would tell you, beloved
		

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			ones, come your other resources.
And can you imagine we're gonna as
		

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			Hubble, we didn't live with him.
We didn't see him. He didn't eat
		

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			with us or interact with us. But
yet we're his beloved ones. He
		

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			doesn't just consider us as his
companions. No, but his beloved
		

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			ones, okay. They said, y'all
rasool Allah, why are they your
		

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			beloved ones? He said something
explaining exactly what I'm
		

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			saying, destroying the building
and building the new one. He said,
		

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			they believed in me without seeing
me. They attempted to do whatever
		

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			I wanted them to do without any
help from my side. You had me to
		

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			help you right? The Prophet was
there to help the companions and
		

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			to guide them, and they found no
one to help them. Right. And
		

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			despite we missing out on things
so Roeselare Salam, yet trying to
		

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			follow his sunnah we get good news
are glad tidings. What is the good
		

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			news? The good news is that
whoever practices the Sunnah of
		

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			Muhammad Salah Salem, and he isn't
alive, gets 50 times the reward of
		

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			the companions. Can you imagine?
And the companions were as shocked
		

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			as you might be now. They said 50
times the reward of us or do we
		

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			get 50 times the reward of them
weighed up were the Companions
		

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			here. You know, we're the ones who
established Islam, because they
		

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			thought they were honorable,
because they saw and lived apart
		

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			with the Prophet Muhammad Salam,
and they truly were they're very
		

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			honorable. Okay. But here the
Prophet Muhammad salaam tries to
		

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			twist the feeling of honor. He
wants to make them feel that
		

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			others to could be honorable and
he says no 50 times the reward of
		

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			you. So this is the good news
Subhan Allah every time you try to
		

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			follow the Prophet Muhammad sai
Salam you
		

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			You get rewarded 50 times the
companions did, okay? What they
		

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			did, but the point here is the
process of building has to
		

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			continue. And you have to build,
but you for building, you have to
		

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			read and you have to educate
yourself. You can't expect someone
		

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			you give them, you know, you give
them the tools, the bricks,
		

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			whatever the you know all the
different tools for building and
		

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			you tell them okay, go ahead build
a building.
		

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			You know, they might build like a,
you know, a shack or something
		

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			that would the first gust of wind
is gonna fall apart. Or they'll
		

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			probably put maybe the base on the
top and then the windows on the
		

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			bottom, they don't know how to
build. If they don't educate
		

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			themselves, they don't know how to
build and the same thing with you.
		

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			Allah subhanaw taala has given you
this child, you have to start
		

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			educating yourself, how are you
going to build this child, you
		

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			have to read you have to seek
knowledge, okay? The Prophet
		

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			Muhammad wa salam says, Whoever is
blessed with three daughters, and
		

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			he takes proper care of them, he
will go to Jannah. That's the
		

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			mission, right? That's your
mission, take care of the three
		

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			kids, you got agenda, your mission
is to do what to take care of your
		

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			kids. So one of the companions had
two daughters. So he said, you
		

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			also have Allah. What about those
who have only two daughters, and
		

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			the Prophet Muhammad wa sallam
said, even two daughters. And in
		

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			another narration, a companion
says, how about if you only have
		

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			one daughter? And he replies, even
if you have one daughter, okay? So
		

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			why don't you make it your mission
of your life and seek Jana through
		

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			taking care of your own children,
and on those hard days where
		

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			you're struggling, and you know,
and you're trying to go through
		

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			that day, and you don't know what
you know, with all these tantrums,
		

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			and all their troubles and their
teenage troubles, or whatever it
		

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			is, try to visualize that you're
striving for agenda, and that your
		

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			kids will be advocates of gender
waiting for you. And you'll be
		

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			asking them by name, can you
please open the gate for me, and
		

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			each one of them will grab a
handle and open that door for you
		

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			try to really visualize that,
picture that and you'll be able to
		

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			make your kids better. Alright,
today, inshallah we're going to be
		

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			building the fourth block, the
block of morals, and the
		

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			manifestation of all that is
behavior or morals. When we talk
		

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			about a clerk or a DAB or manners,
I think that before we can
		

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			manifest that truly and genuinely
there has to be a concept of the
		

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			concept of data worshipping,
right. And if that is not well
		

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			ingrained, and situated and built
in the mind of the child, manners
		

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			will be artificial and potentials,
if the kids are not doing it out
		

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			of love and fear for Allah
subhanaw taala is going to be
		

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			something that they're just
they're just pretending to do it.
		

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			And once you're not there, they
won't care. But if they have fear
		

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			of Allah subhanaw taala, they know
that Allah subhanaw taala is what
		

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			observing them at all times, they
have the link of anger or
		

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			worshipping that we spoke about
last time, then the manners will
		

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			fall into place very easily.
Again, as we said, it's a
		

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			building, you have to take by
steps, you can't just stop jump
		

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			building, either when they don't
have that link with you, they
		

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			won't do it, they won't do it for
you, they won't do for anybody,
		

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			they doing it for you. Once they
don't have that bond with you,
		

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			they won't do it. So if you don't
think your child to you, you don't
		

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			link them to the Prophet Muhammad
says salam, as we said, it's very
		

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			important to tell your kids
stories about the prophet to make
		

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			them love him. Because even if God
forbid, say we're not here
		

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			tomorrow, nobody can work can
guarantee their life, they can
		

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			have something they can always
refer to. Right? If he becomes the
		

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			role model. And that's, that's
your duty to make that they can
		

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			always refer to him. Right? You
can sit telling your kids I am
		

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			good, I did this, I did that. But
you can always tell them stories
		

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			about the Prophet Muhammad. So
seldom, you could tell them about
		

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			Allah subhanaw taala and how
merciful he is, if we are here for
		

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			our children, it's great that they
see that in our actions and our
		

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			behavior. But if we're not here
tomorrow, they shouldn't, they
		

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			shouldn't feel that the whole
world collapse in front of them,
		

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			they should have something that
they can refer to, they could have
		

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			somebody that they could be their
guide, and that's the Prophet
		

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			Muhammad sai Salam.
		

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			And we said that if we don't build
that, first the emotions and so on
		

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			so forth of reaching the iPad,
right athlete and then a bed, any
		

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			wave would come and it will be
very evil, you know, very easy to
		

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			destroy it to destroy the entire
building that we built right? If
		

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			we don't have that built on top of
each other. Now when we talk about
		

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			manners and o'clock, what do we
say immediately? Look at the
		

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			outcome of a child who has been
brought up by the one whom Allah
		

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			subhanaw taala says about him.
We're in Nicola Hula, hula
		

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			crowding truly upon what the
greatest of manners. Okay? Do you
		

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			understand what a hobby means? If
you look at the Quran, it means
		

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			great, right? And if you look at
the Quran, and it asks Muslims to
		

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			be well mannered, you will always
notice the Quran tells you what as
		

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			you as human beings or as Muslims
to have hola Hassan good manners.
		

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			It doesn't tell you to have hola
Kadeem, it tells you what hola
		

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			cousin, if you always look through
the Quran, that that's the term
		

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			use with us as human beings. Now,
this is what you're required to
		

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			do, right to have good manners.
But what is our we mean?
		

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			It was kind of Dallas telling you
that a Rasool peace be upon him is
		

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			a higher status that even those
who have good manners, okay,
		

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			cannot reach that step. It's not
Avi, we have the greatest of
		

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			manners, and that's why we should
always try to link our kids to him
		

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			SallAllahu wasallam. So any
companion or any follower or any
		

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			holy person, on you know, until
this day or yesterday or 100 years
		

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			ago, that existed on Earth, with
the most magnificent manners and
		

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			morals and has the best of o'clock
		

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			I always be certain that the
Prophet Muhammad Ali Salam is
		

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			what? Higher way higher than that
person so much that he has a clock
		

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			of him great manners, not just
o'clock has enough as we are
		

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			related to as human beings. Okay,
do you understand the impact this
		

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			verse has when we say we're in
Nicola. Hola Hola can Hassan or do
		

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			we say? No we're in Nicola
hooligan. Are we truly you're not
		

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			just upon good manners but you're
upon the greatest or the greatest
		

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			or the biggest of what matters.
And if you look at the word or the
		

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			it's always linked with greatness,
right? Allah subhanaw taala has
		

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			been the Quran has been the Day of
Judgment of robbing the hellfire
		

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			and it's punishment of our theme.
But the mores of the Prophet
		

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			Muhammad Salim deserve to be on
that same level of greatness. Do
		

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			you ever think of that right?
Hence we're in Mecca Lala Hola,
		

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			Kannada, not Allah, Allah
hooligan, Hassan, you're probably
		

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			not the greatest of manners. Okay?
Now imagine this Avi Satana,
		

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			Muhammad wa salam, this human
being is moving on Earth, right?
		

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			interacting with other humans? Do
you think there'll be artificial
		

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			in their manners? Or are they
going to be superficial? Or
		

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			they're going to be pretentious?
No way. There's no way. How could
		

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			you It's you said about it. Think
about it. Whenever you're in the
		

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			presence of certain people, or you
live with them for too long, or
		

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			you're with them for too long.
Somehow somewhat, you get affected
		

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			by their event, you pick up
something from them, whether you
		

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			like it or not, you find yourself
either talking like them, or
		

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			acting like them, or your voice
level either goes higher like
		

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			them, or it goes lower like them,
depending right? Sometimes people
		

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			who are allowed when you talk with
them, you find yourself without
		

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			even realizing you're raising your
voice. And sometimes you walk into
		

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			a room and you're speaking to this
person who's so like soft spoken,
		

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			you find yourself automatically
like, oh my god, what am I doing?
		

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			Why am I screaming? You know, like
crazy or what? And you bring down
		

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			your voice level. So imagine if
now you're accompanying this man
		

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			who is worth walking on Earth with
holo coffee, right? What is going
		

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			to be the outcome? Is it going to
be superficial? Is it going to be
		

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			natural? Why? Because the other or
the greatness is radiating. It's
		

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			like the sun radiating its heat
from miles and miles. And you can
		

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			feel the heat you can feel the
greatness of the scholar and
		

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			definitely has to impact you.
Subhanallah right. And it's not
		

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			just that what you feel that feels
the sorry, it's not you that just
		

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			feels the greatness of the whole
look. No, it's felt by the plants,
		

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			the animals, it's felt by
everything on the face of Earth's
		

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			panela everything felt that whole
front of it Muhammad Sallallahu
		

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			wasallam. And you remember the
Hadith, where the prophet Muhammad
		

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			wa salam used to lean on the trunk
of the tree for many many months
		

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			before they built him what a
member in the master that never we
		

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			write and now you sit on a chair
and after you get up you know,
		

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			you'll sit and sit you know, you
think about it nowadays, you sit
		

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			on a chair. And after you get up
somebody else comes and sits on
		

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			this chair, you know, there's
Sunday Halaqaat and Thursday
		

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			calipers Monday calipers. So many
people go and come and then
		

00:12:38 --> 00:12:40

			eventually it's just going to be
what ruined, you know, it's going
		

00:12:40 --> 00:12:43

			to be what thrown out in the
garbage, right? And so on, so
		

00:12:43 --> 00:12:46

			forth. Right? But that didn't
happen with a tree trunk. We see
		

00:12:46 --> 00:12:50

			that Muhammad, because it wasn't
like these chairs. And the person
		

00:12:50 --> 00:12:53

			who was leaning on it was not like
me and you right? It wasn't any
		

00:12:53 --> 00:12:56

			person who was the prophet. Can
you imagine that this trunk
		

00:12:56 --> 00:13:00

			continued to weep after the member
was built out of missing the
		

00:13:00 --> 00:13:04

			Prophet Muhammad Ali Salam leaving
on it. Can you imagine a trunk
		

00:13:04 --> 00:13:08

			even the solid things nonliving
things they could feel him
		

00:13:08 --> 00:13:11

			Subhanallah as I sell them, the
greatest of men. So try to raise
		

00:13:11 --> 00:13:15

			your aspirations right way higher.
So you can make it easy to think
		

00:13:15 --> 00:13:18

			about children then raised by the
Prophet Muhammad say salam, if
		

00:13:18 --> 00:13:23

			this is how he is. So picture How
are children if the tree was
		

00:13:23 --> 00:13:26

			impacted by him? The tree who can
talk or move or understand was
		

00:13:26 --> 00:13:29

			impacted by him? How are the
children going to be impacted by
		

00:13:29 --> 00:13:33

			him? Think about it. Same lino try
to think of it that way okay. How
		

00:13:33 --> 00:13:37

			can they be not have the best of
morals and manners you understand
		

00:13:37 --> 00:13:41

			now how these companions were who
they were you know when you think
		

00:13:41 --> 00:13:43

			about how saved them a homicide
Salim was because he was their
		

00:13:43 --> 00:13:47

			companion right? Even when they
were little children. Now let's
		

00:13:47 --> 00:13:50

			move to incidents that happened
right to kind of explain a little
		

00:13:50 --> 00:13:52

			bit more. And listen to the medic
says what we keep on referring
		

00:13:52 --> 00:13:54

			always to an incident emetic,
because he lived with the Prophet
		

00:13:54 --> 00:13:57

			Muhammad says Allah he says, I
served the Prophet Muhammad so I
		

00:13:57 --> 00:14:00

			sent him for 10 years and tried to
picture someone is talking to you
		

00:14:00 --> 00:14:04

			about their work experience you
can definitely imagine especially
		

00:14:04 --> 00:14:06

			if you don't like your job right?
What will you say oh, the salaries
		

00:14:06 --> 00:14:09

			this or that or the managers this
or that? Or they're always whether
		

00:14:09 --> 00:14:12

			there's always something bothering
you about I can't believe look at
		

00:14:12 --> 00:14:14

			the, you know, the schedule they
gave me or something, something
		

00:14:14 --> 00:14:18

			always that nags you about it,
okay. But imagine a child saying I
		

00:14:18 --> 00:14:22

			worked for the Prophet Muhammad
Sallallahu, wasallam 10 years. And
		

00:14:22 --> 00:14:27

			by Allah he never told me often
once he didn't have a path to me
		

00:14:27 --> 00:14:31

			once, right? He never said to me
why we said this before. He never
		

00:14:31 --> 00:14:34

			said to me, why did you do so?
Okay, which I never asked you to
		

00:14:34 --> 00:14:38

			do? Or why didn't you do that that
I asked you to do? When law he he
		

00:14:38 --> 00:14:41

			never did that? I still don't
comprehend that but I don't know
		

00:14:41 --> 00:14:44

			how it happened. But then how say
them how Selim was. But what's
		

00:14:44 --> 00:14:48

			interesting is that honestly Malik
is using a Quranic expression
		

00:14:49 --> 00:14:52

			walawe Hema Connolly often caught,
right. And this is a Quranic
		

00:14:53 --> 00:14:56

			expression that is related to what
to parents, right? Well, it's an
		

00:14:56 --> 00:14:59

			homage to the kalam often do not
tell your parents what off he's
		

00:15:00 --> 00:15:03

			relating to a Quranic verses
little child who's 10 years old or
		

00:15:03 --> 00:15:06

			11 years old. Imagine Allah
subhanaw taala is saying you don't
		

00:15:06 --> 00:15:10

			say often to your parents to have
good manners, and the Prophet
		

00:15:10 --> 00:15:14

			Mohammed Salah Salem is not saying
off to a 10 year old servant in
		

00:15:14 --> 00:15:15

			his house
		

00:15:16 --> 00:15:17

			is in this Holika we
		

00:15:18 --> 00:15:22

			were ordered not to tell our
parents of, but the prophet is not
		

00:15:22 --> 00:15:26

			telling off to a little 10 year
old, not his child, but a servant.
		

00:15:26 --> 00:15:29

			You hear now about what people do
to their servants overseas. It's,
		

00:15:30 --> 00:15:32

			it's hideous, they treat them like
I don't know, if they had a cat,
		

00:15:32 --> 00:15:34

			they probably cheat the cat better
than what they do to these people.
		

00:15:35 --> 00:15:37

			Right, they sign off a contract
from them taking away from them,
		

00:15:37 --> 00:15:39

			their kids or they can travel
without their permission or this
		

00:15:39 --> 00:15:43

			or that. And the Prophet Muhammad
SAW I sent them not saying offer
		

00:15:43 --> 00:15:48

			huffing and puffing to a 10 year
old servant in his household. The
		

00:15:48 --> 00:15:51

			twist is that we are ordered not
to say off to our parents, because
		

00:15:51 --> 00:15:55

			this is our level, right? This is
what we could do to be the best,
		

00:15:55 --> 00:15:57

			right? But the Prophet Muhammad
said Salam is even better than
		

00:15:57 --> 00:16:01

			that. He never ever said it to a
child. Anything that is not
		

00:16:01 --> 00:16:03

			distressed anything sorry, that is
disrespectful, never ordered
		

00:16:03 --> 00:16:07

			something that's disrespectful to
a child, even if it was the word
		

00:16:07 --> 00:16:08

			half. Or
		

00:16:09 --> 00:16:12

			which we say how many times do we
say that to our children? Subhan
		

00:16:12 --> 00:16:16

			Allah, not to a servant, but your
own children? Do you see the
		

00:16:16 --> 00:16:19

			greatness and how you should lead
yourself he's our role model. He's
		

00:16:19 --> 00:16:23

			the one that we should inspire
ourselves with, right? So we can
		

00:16:23 --> 00:16:26

			treat our children the way we want
them to come out to be the way the
		

00:16:26 --> 00:16:29

			companions were. And in another
incident, the Prophet Muhammad
		

00:16:29 --> 00:16:33

			Sallallahu Sallam sends us run an
errand. And he forgets and he
		

00:16:33 --> 00:16:35

			starts playing, we mentioned this
one again, with other kids that
		

00:16:35 --> 00:16:38

			were playing. And suddenly he
hears the Prophet what from behind
		

00:16:38 --> 00:16:42

			him saying what an S. And Anna
says, I turned around, of course,
		

00:16:42 --> 00:16:45

			can you imagine like you sent your
child to do something? And then
		

00:16:45 --> 00:16:47

			you go find them? So playing
whatever with their iPad, or their
		

00:16:47 --> 00:16:50

			rocks or whatever? Or they're
Lagos? After an hour? What are you
		

00:16:50 --> 00:16:54

			going to do? Like, you just, your
voice is going to the neighbors
		

00:16:54 --> 00:16:56

			are probably going to complain
from how loud your voice is,
		

00:16:56 --> 00:16:59

			right? But this is the prophet,
the prophet who sent all mankind
		

00:16:59 --> 00:17:02

			he sees him. He says, No, so Allah
says, what? Oh, my God, like, he
		

00:17:02 --> 00:17:05

			thought he's in trouble. And he
says, I turned around, and I
		

00:17:05 --> 00:17:06

			looked at him, and he was
laughing.
		

00:17:08 --> 00:17:11

			I don't know how but he was
laughing. So he was selling. Now
		

00:17:11 --> 00:17:15

			imagine you asked your husband to
pick up something for you. Right?
		

00:17:15 --> 00:17:17

			On your way back, you have some
people coming over. And after an
		

00:17:17 --> 00:17:20

			hour, he shows up and nothing is
with him? Would you be laughing?
		

00:17:21 --> 00:17:21

			Exactly.
		

00:17:22 --> 00:17:27

			She's like, No. Or imagine you ask
your child to clean up something
		

00:17:27 --> 00:17:30

			or do something. And after an
hour, you find them still playing
		

00:17:30 --> 00:17:34

			with what they were playing with?
Would you be laughing? Is it a
		

00:17:34 --> 00:17:38

			context of laughter? I mean, there
is nothing to urge you to live in
		

00:17:38 --> 00:17:41

			such a situation, you're very
upset, right? How could you do
		

00:17:41 --> 00:17:44

			this? Or how could you not do
that? Is it a context of smiling?
		

00:17:44 --> 00:17:47

			Or is it a cocktail of sorry, a
context of approachment? Right?
		

00:17:47 --> 00:17:50

			And why did you do this? Or why
didn't you do this? And I told you
		

00:17:50 --> 00:17:54

			how could you forget? And and it's
the end of the world? Right for
		

00:17:54 --> 00:17:57

			them to relate? Who were who your
talk. And I looked at him and he
		

00:17:57 --> 00:18:02

			was laughing? And Anna said, Did
you and he said NS did you go
		

00:18:02 --> 00:18:06

			where I asked you to go? And I
said I replied, I am going on
		

00:18:06 --> 00:18:06

			going?
		

00:18:09 --> 00:18:12

			Typical of children. Right? And
the Prophet Muhammad Salam
		

00:18:12 --> 00:18:16

			understood, it's typical of
children to forget, it's typical
		

00:18:16 --> 00:18:20

			of children, to see children
playing and to get what distracted
		

00:18:20 --> 00:18:24

			by them, okay? It's normal for a
child to be fascinated by other
		

00:18:24 --> 00:18:27

			children play and it get easily
distracted. And out of this
		

00:18:27 --> 00:18:30

			expectation that this is typical.
The Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu
		

00:18:30 --> 00:18:34

			Sallam laughed and smiled. We want
our children to be like robots. Do
		

00:18:34 --> 00:18:37

			this, do that do that. Kids are
kids, they need to play they need
		

00:18:37 --> 00:18:40

			to laugh. I know they need
discipline, they need to have
		

00:18:40 --> 00:18:43

			their certain routine and
everything. But their kids, they
		

00:18:43 --> 00:18:46

			still don't have that heavy weight
of responsibility on their lives.
		

00:18:46 --> 00:18:49

			They're still experimenting, and
we expect them to be like robots
		

00:18:49 --> 00:18:51

			do this do that. Why are you
laughing? I don't think it's
		

00:18:51 --> 00:18:53

			funny. You should have been doing
this. You shouldn't be doing that.
		

00:18:53 --> 00:18:56

			You know. But so you know,
Muhammad Hassan understood the
		

00:18:56 --> 00:19:00

			nature of a child, a child wants
to play in life, and therefore out
		

00:19:00 --> 00:19:02

			of that, he didn't have the
expectation of I expect him to go
		

00:19:02 --> 00:19:05

			and if he sees kids, he's not
going to play with them. He knows
		

00:19:05 --> 00:19:08

			very well, if he saw a child
playing, you might very well get
		

00:19:08 --> 00:19:11

			distracted. That's natural for a
kid. And their thing to do was not
		

00:19:11 --> 00:19:15

			what anything except that smile on
his face. SallAllahu wasallam. Do
		

00:19:15 --> 00:19:19

			you know when you become angry,
you become angry when you're
		

00:19:19 --> 00:19:23

			surprised. You become angry when
you anticipate or expect
		

00:19:23 --> 00:19:26

			something, and it doesn't happen,
right? You tell your child to do
		

00:19:26 --> 00:19:29

			so and so and you expect them to
do it. When they don't do it. Then
		

00:19:29 --> 00:19:33

			you come out. Angry great. But the
fact that the Prophet Muhammad SAW
		

00:19:33 --> 00:19:37

			Selim is smiling, shows that he
knows the nature of children. And
		

00:19:37 --> 00:19:40

			this is exactly what we as parents
should come to learn and
		

00:19:40 --> 00:19:43

			understand. And when you come to
learn and understand that a year
		

00:19:43 --> 00:19:47

			old child behaves like this, you
will never be angry.
		

00:19:48 --> 00:19:49

			That's natural.
		

00:19:50 --> 00:19:54

			Or even a six year old or a seven
year old, you will be angry. It
		

00:19:54 --> 00:19:57

			doesn't mean that you become
insensitive or that you leave your
		

00:19:57 --> 00:19:59

			role as a guide or or as an
advisor. It means
		

00:20:00 --> 00:20:03

			that you don't become hysterical.
And that you don't change the
		

00:20:03 --> 00:20:05

			wrong with something that even
wrong or something that will break
		

00:20:05 --> 00:20:09

			your original bridge that you
spent years and years and that
		

00:20:09 --> 00:20:13

			emotional bridge the bridge of
confidence you got I'm saying,
		

00:20:14 --> 00:20:17

			because once this bridge is broken
again, once this confidence is
		

00:20:17 --> 00:20:20

			destroyed, expect anything. Once
you make your child lose
		

00:20:20 --> 00:20:24

			confidence in themselves and you
break that bond between them, you
		

00:20:24 --> 00:20:27

			can expect your child to look for
alternatives that your child will
		

00:20:27 --> 00:20:30

			lie to you expect that one day he
could even hate you expect
		

00:20:30 --> 00:20:34

			anything, any of that he'll go
look outside for another friend or
		

00:20:34 --> 00:20:36

			girlfriend or a boyfriend or god
knows whatever again, whatever it
		

00:20:36 --> 00:20:40

			is, it could be that we'll just
basically give them that feeling
		

00:20:40 --> 00:20:43

			that they're confident or give
them that you know what they're
		

00:20:43 --> 00:20:46

			they're lacking from you know from
you or what you are not giving
		

00:20:46 --> 00:20:50

			them basically. And the Prophet
Muhammad Salim wanted to laugh and
		

00:20:50 --> 00:20:54

			to assure him, and I'm sure that
this smile had a tremendous impact
		

00:20:54 --> 00:20:57

			on a soldier law and, and it made
him a little embarrassed because
		

00:20:57 --> 00:21:01

			he saw that confidence that the
Prophet Muhammad SAW I send them
		

00:21:01 --> 00:21:06

			gave to him. I trust that you are
going that's why I'm laughing. He
		

00:21:06 --> 00:21:08

			smiled. He was like, I know you're
going, you got destroyed, but I
		

00:21:08 --> 00:21:13

			know you're going. Okay. And that
feeling is being radiated through
		

00:21:13 --> 00:21:16

			his laughter and this is what gave
him the confidence to say that I'm
		

00:21:16 --> 00:21:18

			going now you're also I didn't
wait for him to say anything. I'm
		

00:21:18 --> 00:21:21

			going down there. I'm going, I'm
going okay. It's different than if
		

00:21:21 --> 00:21:24

			I read if he raised his voice and
yelled at him. He would have still
		

00:21:24 --> 00:21:28

			gone right either way he was gonna
go. But it's a big difference
		

00:21:28 --> 00:21:31

			whether he looks at him and smiles
or did you go yet? Right versus
		

00:21:31 --> 00:21:34

			like, what are you doing? Why
don't you go I told you like I
		

00:21:34 --> 00:21:37

			told you to do. He's still gonna
do the same thing. But with what?
		

00:21:37 --> 00:21:40

			Here? You didn't break the child's
confidence in here. You did what?
		

00:21:40 --> 00:21:43

			You broke something in them. You
belittle them, right.
		

00:21:45 --> 00:21:48

			Okay. And then as I said, he
smiled and anise went and his love
		

00:21:48 --> 00:21:51

			for the Prophet Muhammad wa salam
did what it grew. And the proof
		

00:21:51 --> 00:21:55

			for that is he narrated this
hadith to us when he was 60 or 70
		

00:21:55 --> 00:21:59

			years old. Since he was 10 years
old. It's an embarrassment. He put
		

00:21:59 --> 00:22:01

			him on the spot in front of his
friends. And there's another
		

00:22:01 --> 00:22:04

			narration for this hadith by
Ernest that highlights another
		

00:22:04 --> 00:22:07

			dimension for it and he says the
Prophet Muhammad Salah never
		

00:22:07 --> 00:22:11

			ordered me to do something that I
didn't do. So there were incidents
		

00:22:11 --> 00:22:14

			that he didn't do what he was
ordered to do. Right? Meaning that
		

00:22:14 --> 00:22:17

			obviously Alice sometimes didn't
do something the Prophet asked him
		

00:22:17 --> 00:22:21

			to do, right. So and the wives of
the Prophet Muhammad wa salam
		

00:22:21 --> 00:22:24

			would start blaming what Ennis?
Okay. And he would intercede take
		

00:22:24 --> 00:22:28

			them 100 To sit for him saying
what? Leave them alone. Okay,
		

00:22:28 --> 00:22:31

			Allah didn't destined for so and
so to happen. So it didn't happen
		

00:22:31 --> 00:22:35

			faster and be like NSP. Do you
know what the Prophet Muhammad wa
		

00:22:35 --> 00:22:39

			salam was doing here? Of course,
he was educating the wives. But
		

00:22:39 --> 00:22:43

			more importantly, he was teaching
the children about cada and cada
		

00:22:43 --> 00:22:47

			about predestiny. Right? Not in a
way that Oh, I won't study and
		

00:22:47 --> 00:22:49

			just make dua to pass or in the
sense where Anna's becomes lazy
		

00:22:49 --> 00:22:52

			and doesn't do whatever he's
supposed to do. Or he doesn't
		

00:22:52 --> 00:22:54

			fulfill his chores. No, in a
constructive way. Leave him
		

00:22:54 --> 00:22:57

			colorless. Let him go. Is it if
he's saying it's something of the
		

00:22:57 --> 00:23:00

			past now? Okay. Don't sit blaming
him. Don't sit, you know, like
		

00:23:00 --> 00:23:03

			putting oil. Why didn't you do
what I told you to do? It's too
		

00:23:03 --> 00:23:05

			late. Like, for example, something
you had to do during daylight.
		

00:23:05 --> 00:23:08

			Okay. Why didn't you do it? Now?
We can do it call us. It's over.
		

00:23:08 --> 00:23:12

			It's in the past. Leave him now.
Okay. But oh, Anna's think about
		

00:23:12 --> 00:23:15

			tomorrow and think about the
future. He's educating the
		

00:23:15 --> 00:23:18

			household about Kedah and coddle
predestiny. Equally, and
		

00:23:18 --> 00:23:21

			importantly, he's not blaming the
child. And blaming, by the way, is
		

00:23:21 --> 00:23:24

			not a very good thing. Remember,
we said before, and the seven
		

00:23:24 --> 00:23:26

			things that we must never do with
a child, one of them was blaming,
		

00:23:26 --> 00:23:28

			okay? By the,
		

00:23:29 --> 00:23:31

			because by the way, it makes your
child will lose their confidence,
		

00:23:32 --> 00:23:35

			and doubt themselves, they become
hesitant, right. And I think when
		

00:23:35 --> 00:23:39

			children grew up being blamed,
they pass on this behavior by
		

00:23:39 --> 00:23:42

			blaming their wives, or spouses,
because this is how they were
		

00:23:42 --> 00:23:45

			raised, they always find the blame
to put it on you. You are not
		

00:23:45 --> 00:23:47

			doing you're not doing why aren't
you doing this? You didn't do this
		

00:23:47 --> 00:23:50

			happen? Because you didn't do
that. And it becomes they forget
		

00:23:50 --> 00:23:53

			about what about my role, and they
start putting the blame on the
		

00:23:53 --> 00:23:57

			other half. Okay. And one of the
items in that block of morals is
		

00:23:57 --> 00:24:01

			mercy. And we spoke about mercy, I
believe this in the third lecture.
		

00:24:01 --> 00:24:04

			So, and I know we did mention it,
but we have to emphasize on this
		

00:24:04 --> 00:24:07

			meaning again, especially in the
times that we live in, where
		

00:24:07 --> 00:24:10

			relations are being severe by
parents and spouses and children,
		

00:24:10 --> 00:24:14

			and we have to talk about mercy.
This is what moisturize the rest
		

00:24:14 --> 00:24:17

			of the relationships. When you
have Subhan Allah, maybe you're
		

00:24:17 --> 00:24:19

			you know, you're tentative about
something in the house, and just
		

00:24:19 --> 00:24:22

			out of nowhere, you come and show
an act of mercy Subhanallah it
		

00:24:22 --> 00:24:26

			kind of calms down everything, you
know, the tension breaks, even if
		

00:24:26 --> 00:24:29

			it's something even if it doesn't
make sense, you know, in your, you
		

00:24:29 --> 00:24:32

			know, in your logic, it might not
make sense to you to be merciful
		

00:24:32 --> 00:24:35

			towards that person or how they
acted. Subhanallah you know, when
		

00:24:35 --> 00:24:39

			you give that mercy, it could just
totally change the dynamics of the
		

00:24:39 --> 00:24:42

			house. Because the person in front
of you sees like, oh, well, like I
		

00:24:42 --> 00:24:45

			did this and they're still acting
this way with me, like, they kind
		

00:24:45 --> 00:24:48

			of like, you know, play low, a
little bit of kind of like, you
		

00:24:48 --> 00:24:51

			know, girl, and the Prophet
Muhammad Salam was a source of
		

00:24:51 --> 00:24:55

			radiating mercy that was absorbed
by those around him. And I'll
		

00:24:55 --> 00:24:58

			mention a hadith narrated by
Abdullah ethnographer who says, I
		

00:24:58 --> 00:25:00

			was with the Prophet Mohammed
Salah mwah
		

00:25:00 --> 00:25:04

			One day, and we entered the garden
and there was a camel. And when
		

00:25:04 --> 00:25:07

			the camel saw the Prophet Muhammad
Sallallahu sallam, he started
		

00:25:07 --> 00:25:10

			weeping the prophets that not the
Prophet sorry the camel started
		

00:25:10 --> 00:25:13

			weeping and Subhan Allah and the
fascinating thing is, this is what
		

00:25:13 --> 00:25:17

			happens when you accompany great
people. I don't think Abdullah
		

00:25:17 --> 00:25:20

			Magoffin would have witnessed the
camel weeping. Have you walked
		

00:25:20 --> 00:25:23

			alone into the garden right? But
he saw the camel weeping because
		

00:25:23 --> 00:25:26

			he was with an amazing person and
this is what happens when you
		

00:25:26 --> 00:25:29

			accompany great people you see
great things, and the Prophet
		

00:25:29 --> 00:25:32

			Muhammad Salim wiped the camel on
his head. And just to tell you
		

00:25:32 --> 00:25:36

			that wiping was not just for
children, he wipes and pads
		

00:25:36 --> 00:25:39

			everything in anything the tree
trunk, you know, the camel, the
		

00:25:39 --> 00:25:43

			children, and he embraces
anything. He's an open arm to
		

00:25:43 --> 00:25:46

			anyone who needs love and care
because he is Rama lol I mean,
		

00:25:46 --> 00:25:50

			he's a mercy to all mankind. So he
writes the head of the camel and
		

00:25:50 --> 00:25:54

			he asks, Who is the owner of that
camel? And a young boy comes and
		

00:25:54 --> 00:25:57

			says your rasool Allah, it's me.
So he says, wouldn't you feel
		

00:25:57 --> 00:26:01

			Allah subhanaw taala in this
animal, which Allah made you own,
		

00:26:01 --> 00:26:05

			he complained to me that you must
feed him he starves the camel
		

00:26:05 --> 00:26:09

			Subhanallah and I think you should
memorize this hadith and tell it
		

00:26:09 --> 00:26:12

			to animal rights civil rights
activists, people who like tell
		

00:26:12 --> 00:26:15

			you the rights and this and that,
and you should tell to children to
		

00:26:15 --> 00:26:18

			them animals talking is a
marveling thing for them. Tell
		

00:26:18 --> 00:26:20

			them the story about the camel.
You know, once upon a time this
		

00:26:20 --> 00:26:23

			this happened, you know, well
marvel that kids love to hear
		

00:26:23 --> 00:26:25

			about oh animals were taught
really? And how did you talk to
		

00:26:25 --> 00:26:28

			these speak German that year? They
get fascinated by these things,
		

00:26:28 --> 00:26:31

			especially the younger ages. Now
what is Abdullah nega getting out
		

00:26:31 --> 00:26:36

			of all of this, what is he
internalizing? He's internalizing
		

00:26:36 --> 00:26:39

			the value of mercy. He's
internalizing the value of
		

00:26:39 --> 00:26:42

			responsibility that you own this
animal. And if you own it, you
		

00:26:42 --> 00:26:46

			cannot abuse it, and take that to
the level of human beings. If you
		

00:26:46 --> 00:26:49

			have a spouse, that doesn't mean
that you abused them. If you have
		

00:26:49 --> 00:26:51

			a child, it doesn't mean that
you've used them because they
		

00:26:51 --> 00:26:55

			belong to you or you own them. And
I don't mean as an beating I mean
		

00:26:55 --> 00:26:58

			as a neglecting them or not giving
them the rights because we said
		

00:26:58 --> 00:27:00

			again abusing I will never speak
about beating this is out of the
		

00:27:00 --> 00:27:04

			question. This is not something
that we even have to talk about.
		

00:27:04 --> 00:27:06

			This is a done deal beatings are
recorded, I'm talking about even
		

00:27:07 --> 00:27:10

			just emotional wise, right. If you
own a child, it's your
		

00:27:10 --> 00:27:13

			responsibility. And this is a duty
it's not about feeding them
		

00:27:13 --> 00:27:16

			properly, or dressing them
properly, but treating them well
		

00:27:16 --> 00:27:20

			and taking care of their emotional
and physical requirements. That's
		

00:27:20 --> 00:27:23

			your duty. And what I want you to
start doing from today inshallah
		

00:27:23 --> 00:27:24

			is to read a hadith
		

00:27:26 --> 00:27:30

			and try to calculate this in your
own way of thinking right? After
		

00:27:30 --> 00:27:33

			you understand its literal meaning
try to make you know a jar to
		

00:27:33 --> 00:27:36

			Allah subhanaw taala to give you
the wisdom to understand the
		

00:27:36 --> 00:27:39

			Hadith beyond the literal meaning,
okay, basically, here he saw the
		

00:27:39 --> 00:27:43

			camel patting what the prophet
sorry, comparing the camera. Okay,
		

00:27:43 --> 00:27:46

			fine. But what does it mean,
right? And he's sort of telling
		

00:27:46 --> 00:27:49

			the boy that you're supposed to
feed him, you have to have mercy.
		

00:27:49 --> 00:27:51

			But on the other side, you're
responsible for loss because I'll
		

00:27:51 --> 00:27:53

			give you something, it's your
duty. And this is what we should
		

00:27:53 --> 00:27:56

			say we should think about it might
be just a fascinating story for
		

00:27:56 --> 00:28:00

			children. But for us, we should
try to, you know, analyze it and
		

00:28:00 --> 00:28:03

			think What am I coming out of it
out with it? You know, when we
		

00:28:03 --> 00:28:05

			read a hadith don't just read it,
okay, I understand it, I
		

00:28:05 --> 00:28:08

			comprehend it, but what does it?
How does it connect to me? How can
		

00:28:08 --> 00:28:11

			I apply it in my own life, you
know, okay.
		

00:28:12 --> 00:28:15

			And abroad of raising meaning in a
meeting that could be applicable
		

00:28:15 --> 00:28:18

			to you in the living or you know,
in the status that you're in,
		

00:28:18 --> 00:28:22

			okay? Or wherever you are, okay?
Your Allah make me feel as if this
		

00:28:22 --> 00:28:25

			hadith was directed to me, even if
I don't have a candle. Alright,
		

00:28:25 --> 00:28:28

			try to understand or read the
Hadith in this way. And this is
		

00:28:28 --> 00:28:32

			how we should be reading our
Islamic texts and religion. We
		

00:28:32 --> 00:28:34

			shouldn't just be reading it.
Okay, I'm reading it to get the
		

00:28:34 --> 00:28:37

			third. That's fine. That's great.
I'm reading Quran to get as many
		

00:28:37 --> 00:28:39

			you know, deeds, one letter
equals, you know, one multiply by
		

00:28:39 --> 00:28:44

			10. Allah can multiply what for
whomever, whomever he wills, but
		

00:28:44 --> 00:28:46

			I'm trying to read and understand
how does it relate to me? How can
		

00:28:46 --> 00:28:50

			I apply it directly to myself into
my family into my kids, that's how
		

00:28:50 --> 00:28:53

			you should be analyzing anything
you read in Islam, right. And if
		

00:28:53 --> 00:28:56

			we don't do that, our religion
won't be about a shortage of bad
		

00:28:56 --> 00:28:59

			or praying Friday prayers. It
won't be just about fasting in
		

00:28:59 --> 00:29:02

			Ramadan, and wearing a fancy dress
and AIDS, right? It will become
		

00:29:02 --> 00:29:05

			your oxygen because unfortunately,
we kind of get caught up in the
		

00:29:05 --> 00:29:08

			rituals. And we don't project
think about the deeper meaning,
		

00:29:08 --> 00:29:11

			right? And it will become your
light and your entire life is
		

00:29:11 --> 00:29:14

			based on this understanding. This
is how we should be when it comes
		

00:29:14 --> 00:29:17

			to reading something in our
religion. And again, if you look
		

00:29:17 --> 00:29:20

			at this hadith being set in a
desert, where girls were buried
		

00:29:20 --> 00:29:24

			alive, it showed children and
adults for the first time that not
		

00:29:24 --> 00:29:28

			only children need to be given
compassion, but even animals have
		

00:29:28 --> 00:29:32

			feelings. Okay? They bury their
kids alive, they bury girls alive
		

00:29:32 --> 00:29:34

			and now the prophet is getting a
camel on his head.
		

00:29:35 --> 00:29:38

			Do you see what he's trying to
convey here to them? And if they
		

00:29:38 --> 00:29:42

			had the right, or the tongue, or
the ability to speak, they would
		

00:29:42 --> 00:29:44

			have spoken out and said we have
been abused? Right, but they
		

00:29:44 --> 00:29:45

			didn't.
		

00:29:46 --> 00:29:49

			What a revelation for Abdullah
ethnographer and imagine him now
		

00:29:49 --> 00:29:52

			growing up and narrating the story
to his youngsters and the value is
		

00:29:52 --> 00:29:56

			being taught in this story. Okay,
so now if we look so far, what
		

00:29:56 --> 00:29:59

			have we said two things that the
Prophet Muhammad I said I've had
		

00:29:59 --> 00:30:00

			Hello Calvin, right
		

00:30:00 --> 00:30:02

			And the highest standard of
manners and moles. And then we
		

00:30:02 --> 00:30:05

			spoke about the manifestation of
this HELOC Robin was children,
		

00:30:06 --> 00:30:09

			right. And the first manifestation
was mercy. And we said that he
		

00:30:09 --> 00:30:13

			taught them rough math, through
many ways, through everywhere in
		

00:30:13 --> 00:30:15

			every possible way he could show
whether it's a smile or a pad or a
		

00:30:15 --> 00:30:19

			hug, to a person to human being to
a tree to an animal, whatever it
		

00:30:19 --> 00:30:22

			was another item that the Prophet
Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam would
		

00:30:22 --> 00:30:26

			build in the child is something
related to the most significant
		

00:30:26 --> 00:30:31

			thing in that child's life. His
parents, hence the item of manners
		

00:30:31 --> 00:30:35

			and added with what with parents,
okay, yes, um, teacher teaching
		

00:30:35 --> 00:30:38

			you how to be of good manners, and
so on, so forth. But how about
		

00:30:38 --> 00:30:40

			your parents, these are the most
important things, these are the
		

00:30:40 --> 00:30:43

			first thing your child sees when
they open their eyes as they see
		

00:30:43 --> 00:30:46

			you, right? You as a parent, okay?
And he taught start teaching them
		

00:30:46 --> 00:30:50

			something called variability in
being dutiful, being good,
		

00:30:50 --> 00:30:53

			treating them with reverence,
respect, and kindness. And I'm
		

00:30:53 --> 00:30:55

			sure we have all heard many
lectures and topics about
		

00:30:55 --> 00:30:58

			betrayal, but it ain't Okay. And
how it's a struggle now between
		

00:30:58 --> 00:31:02

			generations and mothers and
fathers. And I think one reason,
		

00:31:02 --> 00:31:05

			okay, for the lack of this
harmonious process taking place of
		

00:31:05 --> 00:31:09

			building blocks is that we don't
really focus on building we don't
		

00:31:09 --> 00:31:12

			have that established very well.
Okay. And what I would like to
		

00:31:12 --> 00:31:15

			focus on is how the Prophet
Muhammad Salah Salem, help
		

00:31:15 --> 00:31:18

			children, children internalize,
build what it is, not through
		

00:31:18 --> 00:31:21

			rhetoric, but through examples,
not telling them, okay, you have
		

00:31:21 --> 00:31:23

			to be dutiful to your mother, your
mom, you have to do this to your
		

00:31:23 --> 00:31:27

			parents. No. But through examples,
he was a living example.
		

00:31:27 --> 00:31:30

			Everything was what he modeled
them if you as a role model, and
		

00:31:30 --> 00:31:34

			it's so much more it has such a
bigger impact when you act it than
		

00:31:34 --> 00:31:38

			when you say it. Because kids hear
all the time. They hear talking
		

00:31:38 --> 00:31:41

			all the time from Europe, from the
school from their friends, talk,
		

00:31:41 --> 00:31:43

			talk talk, but sometimes they'll
see something and we'll stick to
		

00:31:43 --> 00:31:47

			their mind SubhanAllah. Okay. And
also with this hadith narrated in
		

00:31:47 --> 00:31:51

			the book of Muhammad, narrated by
Abdullah in the alpha, and he
		

00:31:51 --> 00:31:54

			says, We were with the Prophet
Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam once,
		

00:31:55 --> 00:31:58

			and a man came and said, came and
said, Oh, Prophet of Allah, a
		

00:31:58 --> 00:32:01

			young boy is dying. And we're
trying to persuade him and remind
		

00:32:01 --> 00:32:05

			him to see that Allah, but he can
utter it. You can say the shahada,
		

00:32:06 --> 00:32:09

			the Prophet Muhammad SAW Selim
says, does he pray? So that's the
		

00:32:09 --> 00:32:13

			first thing he asked Does he pray?
The answer was yes, he does. Okay.
		

00:32:14 --> 00:32:17

			Then the Prophet Muhammad Hassan
felt it was a matter that needed
		

00:32:17 --> 00:32:21

			his full attention. So he got up
and he went to see this young boy.
		

00:32:21 --> 00:32:24

			And around him were the
companions. And he met the boy.
		

00:32:24 --> 00:32:27

			And he taught him see, let you
know, hey, Lola, and the boys are
		

00:32:27 --> 00:32:32

			the Prophet Muhammad wa salam set
and said, I can say it, I know it.
		

00:32:32 --> 00:32:36

			I understand it, and I lived for
it. I said it every time in my
		

00:32:36 --> 00:32:40

			salah. So a relative, the boys
said, Oh, Prophet of Allah, he
		

00:32:40 --> 00:32:43

			used to disobey his mother cannot
happen, the validity, the
		

00:32:43 --> 00:32:46

			validity. Now look at the
following question that the
		

00:32:46 --> 00:32:49

			Prophet Muhammad Hassan poses,
right, the first thing he asked,
		

00:32:50 --> 00:32:53

			he's trying to say, is this boy,
right? He's about to die. He says,
		

00:32:53 --> 00:32:58

			is his mother alive? Right? They
say yes. He said, Let's go to her.
		

00:32:58 --> 00:33:01

			And now look at the conversation
between the mother and the Prophet
		

00:33:01 --> 00:33:04

			Muhammad Ali Salam. And look at
how the Prophet Muhammad Salam
		

00:33:04 --> 00:33:07

			dramatizes the situation. And he's
Allah send them says to her,
		

00:33:08 --> 00:33:08

			imagine
		

00:33:10 --> 00:33:12

			if the Hellfire with its
magnificent magnificant
		

00:33:12 --> 00:33:16

			magnificent serie is being lit for
your son, and your son will be
		

00:33:16 --> 00:33:20

			thrown within seconds into that
fire. But then someone turns to
		

00:33:20 --> 00:33:24

			you and says to you, you may
intercede. Would you intercede,
		

00:33:24 --> 00:33:28

			right? He didn't speak to her
about what her son did, or what
		

00:33:28 --> 00:33:31

			happened in the past, or was he
yelling or not? He said, he's
		

00:33:31 --> 00:33:34

			pointing out that the boy is dying
and you have the choice to
		

00:33:34 --> 00:33:38

			intercede. It's up to you or he
will burn what what he says what
		

00:33:38 --> 00:33:42

			we're in LA Jara kna. Okay, a
quantities final. How would you
		

00:33:42 --> 00:33:42

			intercede for him?
		

00:33:44 --> 00:33:47

			She replied, Your rasool Allah of
course, I would intercede,
		

00:33:47 --> 00:33:51

			intercede. He disobeyed he yelled
or, you know, he felt her half or
		

00:33:51 --> 00:33:54

			puffery didn't listen to her. But
when a moment of burning or how
		

00:33:54 --> 00:33:58

			come I will intercede, I will
forget the past. I will embrace
		

00:33:58 --> 00:34:02

			him. I might even throw myself in
the Hellfire to protect him. Then
		

00:34:02 --> 00:34:06

			the Prophet Muhammad SAW said Lim
said, then say Ya rasool Allah, I
		

00:34:06 --> 00:34:10

			bear witness that I will intercede
and she says, I did witness your
		

00:34:10 --> 00:34:14

			Rasul Allah that I will intercede.
Then the Prophet Muhammad SAW I
		

00:34:14 --> 00:34:17

			said lamb went back to the boy who
was still alive, thank God and
		

00:34:17 --> 00:34:21

			told him si la ilaha illallah wa
wa Sharika was shadow under
		

00:34:21 --> 00:34:25

			Muhammad and Abdullah Sulu. And
the boy said it and the Prophet
		

00:34:25 --> 00:34:29

			Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam says
what All Praise be to Allah Who
		

00:34:29 --> 00:34:31

			saved him from hellfire and
hamdulillah let's see what that
		

00:34:31 --> 00:34:35

			German Allah Subhan Allah this is
the the relationship here between
		

00:34:35 --> 00:34:39

			what the child and the mother and
deliver it in and I want to share
		

00:34:39 --> 00:34:42

			another Hadith about vulnerability
but another you know better one
		

00:34:42 --> 00:34:44

			shot like this was a little bit
one scary but we'll have something
		

00:34:44 --> 00:34:48

			a little bit more on the positive
side. And he said he narrated that
		

00:34:48 --> 00:34:51

			he should the Prophet of the wife
of the Prophet Muhammad Salim who
		

00:34:51 --> 00:34:54

			is by the way was only 18 years
old when the Prophet Muhammad says
		

00:34:54 --> 00:34:58

			salaam died right? And she said I
entered he said she says that the
		

00:34:58 --> 00:34:59

			Prophet Muhammad Salim said
		

00:35:00 --> 00:35:03

			I entered Janna to visit right
during what Illustra and Mirage.
		

00:35:03 --> 00:35:07

			So I heard someone reciting
Quranic beautiful voice, and I
		

00:35:07 --> 00:35:11

			said who is that? They said to me
this is harder to ignore man, a
		

00:35:11 --> 00:35:15

			companion to the Prophet Muhammad
wa sallam said, Cadet ecomobility
		

00:35:15 --> 00:35:19

			Chaotic Mulder, that is the
destiny of someone who is dutiful
		

00:35:19 --> 00:35:22

			to his parents, because it was
known amongst the Companions
		

00:35:22 --> 00:35:27

			amongst the whole city, that the
most dutiful of the companions to
		

00:35:27 --> 00:35:31

			his parents was who and how to
tame the normal Subhanallah the
		

00:35:31 --> 00:35:35

			Prophet Muhammad Salah Musa you
didn't ask a why would why is he
		

00:35:35 --> 00:35:38

			recited? Why do I hear his voice
reciting in Jannah? Right? When he
		

00:35:38 --> 00:35:41

			wasn't even Dario, how could I
hear his voice? He knew right away
		

00:35:41 --> 00:35:45

			you even ask what he was doing
right? He knew straight away. And
		

00:35:45 --> 00:35:48

			the commentator on this hadith
says and he was dutiful to his
		

00:35:48 --> 00:35:51

			mother. He knew because he had
been that dutiful, over, you know,
		

00:35:52 --> 00:35:54

			being dutiful to his mother. He
knew right away. That's why That's
		

00:35:54 --> 00:35:58

			why he was reciting with his
beautiful voice in what agenda now
		

00:35:58 --> 00:36:01

			compare between the one who was
about to be thrown in hellfire,
		

00:36:01 --> 00:36:03

			and between the one who was
dutiful to his mother or his
		

00:36:03 --> 00:36:07

			parents. And this is something
that is your duty, how to teach
		

00:36:07 --> 00:36:10

			your kids to have very to you,
whether you can show it to them by
		

00:36:10 --> 00:36:14

			exemplifying or showing it to them
how you are with your parents, or
		

00:36:14 --> 00:36:17

			even know telling them stories. If
your parents aren't around
		

00:36:17 --> 00:36:20

			anymore, then you can tell them
how you are with your parents. Or
		

00:36:20 --> 00:36:23

			how you know maybe you wished you
were to be you know with your
		

00:36:23 --> 00:36:26

			parents, show them how to do
better show them go kiss your
		

00:36:26 --> 00:36:29

			parents hands in front of them,
teach them how to have better to
		

00:36:29 --> 00:36:33

			you how to be dutiful to yourself.
Now imagine Hadith a hearing the
		

00:36:33 --> 00:36:37

			story and then passing it on to
his children. You see how it's you
		

00:36:37 --> 00:36:40

			know the building of blocks has
been inherited, and that will hurt
		

00:36:40 --> 00:36:41

			your rates and sorry
		

00:36:42 --> 00:36:45

			that the Prophet Muhammad wa
sallam saw a man and with him a
		

00:36:45 --> 00:36:49

			boy. So the Prophet Muhammad says
salam asked Who is this, the boy
		

00:36:49 --> 00:36:52

			replied, he's my father to Prophet
said then don't walk in front of
		

00:36:52 --> 00:36:56

			him and don't do anything that
will provoke him to insult you.
		

00:36:56 --> 00:37:00

			Basically Don't be the cause of
your father what doing a sin Okay,
		

00:37:00 --> 00:37:03

			as for the walking in front of him
this color say like Some scholars
		

00:37:03 --> 00:37:06

			say you should walk behind your
father or behind your father
		

00:37:06 --> 00:37:08

			during your day or your parents
during the day and in front of
		

00:37:08 --> 00:37:11

			them to protect them during the
nighttime right kind of a
		

00:37:11 --> 00:37:14

			bodyguard. But wherever, whatever
way, it was explained by the by
		

00:37:14 --> 00:37:17

			the scholars, the bottom line is
try to show respect to them.
		

00:37:17 --> 00:37:19

			Right, if you father's work, you
don't just go ahead of them and
		

00:37:19 --> 00:37:22

			teach that your children it's your
duty. Don't come and complain when
		

00:37:22 --> 00:37:25

			your kids grow older, that they're
not what being dutiful, they're
		

00:37:25 --> 00:37:28

			not being respectful, if you don't
teach them how that respect is.
		

00:37:28 --> 00:37:32

			Don't expect it from them later.
Okay. And in another Hadith, a man
		

00:37:32 --> 00:37:35

			came to the Prophet Muhammad say
salam and told him all prophet of
		

00:37:35 --> 00:37:39

			Allah, I have committed a major
sin. And this is important to
		

00:37:39 --> 00:37:41

			understand guys, sometimes you
hear people reading about the
		

00:37:41 --> 00:37:43

			companions and then they say, Oh
my God, how could have they done
		

00:37:43 --> 00:37:46

			this with that? The companions are
not saints, they're not holy,
		

00:37:46 --> 00:37:49

			okay? They're human beings, they
sin and they learn and so on so
		

00:37:49 --> 00:37:52

			forth. Of course, they were much
more privileged because they lived
		

00:37:52 --> 00:37:55

			with the Prophet Muhammad sai
Salam, but they're human beings
		

00:37:55 --> 00:37:58

			are we're all human beings that
human beings are created to sin,
		

00:37:58 --> 00:38:01

			but they always did what they
always knew the wrong and they
		

00:38:01 --> 00:38:05

			repented intensely. They like the
once they did something, they went
		

00:38:05 --> 00:38:08

			right away into repented. And it
was a genuine repentance. It
		

00:38:08 --> 00:38:10

			wasn't just like, oh, I repent.
And then the next day I'm like,
		

00:38:11 --> 00:38:13

			you know, kind of sort of, you
know, swaying back and forth.
		

00:38:13 --> 00:38:17

			Okay. The Prophet Muhammad and
send them right away, asked him
		

00:38:17 --> 00:38:20

			what he didn't ask him. Do you
pray? Do you fast? Do you do to
		

00:38:20 --> 00:38:23

			hedgerows? You know this or that?
Have you done harsh? He said, What
		

00:38:24 --> 00:38:25

			do you have a mother
		

00:38:26 --> 00:38:30

			is a girl so he made it a major
sin? Do you have a mother? The
		

00:38:30 --> 00:38:33

			young man replied, No, your rasool
Allah. What do you think the next
		

00:38:33 --> 00:38:35

			quote? Next question would be?
Maybe it asked Do you have a
		

00:38:35 --> 00:38:38

			father or do you have you know,
something like that? Or did you
		

00:38:38 --> 00:38:40

			fast or can you faster? Do you
have money to get for the sake of
		

00:38:40 --> 00:38:44

			Allah? Whatever? No. He says,
What? Do you have a maternal aunt,
		

00:38:45 --> 00:38:49

			a sister to your mother? He
replied, Yes. Yeah. Rasool Allah.
		

00:38:49 --> 00:38:53

			Rasool Allah Salam said what then
can borrow on behalf the beauty be
		

00:38:53 --> 00:38:54

			dutiful to her.
		

00:38:55 --> 00:38:58

			The mother is not here. It's your
aunt then. The closest one to your
		

00:38:58 --> 00:39:01

			parents. Hello. There are many
morals that the Prophet Muhammad
		

00:39:01 --> 00:39:04

			says Selim instilled in children,
in addition to better read it in
		

00:39:04 --> 00:39:07

			and one of them is adapt even with
your own siblings. And in the
		

00:39:07 --> 00:39:10

			Hadith Narrated by Abu Hurayrah.
The Prophet Muhammad Salah Selim
		

00:39:10 --> 00:39:13

			says, Whoever points just points
even with a stick at his brother
		

00:39:13 --> 00:39:18

			to scare him, then the angels
curse him. Even if he's your own
		

00:39:18 --> 00:39:21

			brother. Can you imagine? No, of
course potential danger has to be
		

00:39:21 --> 00:39:24

			it doesn't have to be a metal
stick, or was it just pointing
		

00:39:24 --> 00:39:26

			like, you know, intimidated? Like,
how could you do it like well, we
		

00:39:26 --> 00:39:29

			see the older siblings, you know
what they do to the younger ones,
		

00:39:29 --> 00:39:33

			you know, even that Subhan Allah,
He is building the awareness
		

00:39:33 --> 00:39:37

			against caring others. He is
creating sensitivity. He's making
		

00:39:37 --> 00:39:40

			you become sensitive towards other
people's feelings, especially your
		

00:39:40 --> 00:39:43

			siblings. And the Prophet Muhammad
has said I'm did this with what
		

00:39:43 --> 00:39:47

			are my respects, and he did this
with the camel, and now he's doing
		

00:39:47 --> 00:39:52

			it with even pointing out handed
someone. Many examples for you to
		

00:39:52 --> 00:39:55

			internalize and Institute the
simple character, which is mercy
		

00:39:55 --> 00:39:59

			and Kiran sensitivity. And another
adult or mentor the Prophet
		

00:39:59 --> 00:40:00

			Muhammad says
		

00:40:00 --> 00:40:03

			Some of them taught the kids was
preserving their identity, not
		

00:40:03 --> 00:40:07

			behaving away just to be accepted,
or to dress or act in a way to
		

00:40:07 --> 00:40:11

			they're not what? secluded or left
out. And when I say preserving
		

00:40:11 --> 00:40:14

			identity, I don't mean it in a
negative way, or an aggressive
		

00:40:14 --> 00:40:17

			sense. Not at all. Okay? But I
mean in a decent and dignified
		

00:40:17 --> 00:40:20

			way. And to clarify more, let me
share with you a hadith narrated
		

00:40:20 --> 00:40:23

			by a child to Abdullah Abdullah
Ahmed, and he says the Prophet
		

00:40:23 --> 00:40:26

			Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam saw a
young boy shaving parts of his
		

00:40:26 --> 00:40:29

			head and leaving parts of his
head. You know, how punks are now
		

00:40:29 --> 00:40:31

			like you have the little, you
know, that cool thing that was out
		

00:40:31 --> 00:40:34

			in the 80s or whatever. And it
seems this boy was trying to
		

00:40:34 --> 00:40:38

			follow a trend in back then. Or he
was trying to be distinct and you
		

00:40:38 --> 00:40:40

			know, outstanding and noticeable,
like people like, oh, wow, look at
		

00:40:40 --> 00:40:43

			him, you know. So the Prophet
Muhammad wa sallam told him you
		

00:40:43 --> 00:40:47

			either shave it all, or you keep
it all okay? And I believe the
		

00:40:47 --> 00:40:52

			Prophet Muhammad Salim wanted the
child to be dignified, and have
		

00:40:52 --> 00:40:55

			you know, two distinct, you know,
have a distinct identity and not
		

00:40:55 --> 00:40:59

			just be a follower, like a sheep
following whatever magazines fell
		

00:40:59 --> 00:41:02

			upon you. This is the fashion this
year, or this is what the TV tells
		

00:41:02 --> 00:41:05

			you. This is how you should be,
you know, dressed up, or these are
		

00:41:05 --> 00:41:07

			the kinds of fashion Oh, you don't
wear white before, I don't know,
		

00:41:07 --> 00:41:10

			may 1, what is it? I don't know
what it is, whatever it is, they
		

00:41:10 --> 00:41:12

			tell you, No, you should do this,
oh, no, this is out of fashion,
		

00:41:12 --> 00:41:14

			you can do this, or you have to be
wearing the silver cord, whatever
		

00:41:14 --> 00:41:18

			it is okay. And secondly, teaching
the child to be independent. So
		

00:41:18 --> 00:41:22

			when he sees maybe a best friend,
or a famous person that they're a
		

00:41:22 --> 00:41:25

			fan of, okay, they will know that
they have principles and rules
		

00:41:25 --> 00:41:28

			that are guiding them, and they
shouldn't just blindly imitate.
		

00:41:29 --> 00:41:31

			Okay, and this is something very
big I'm sure we can all relate to
		

00:41:31 --> 00:41:34

			nowadays. And again, that's why I
always have to keep telling you
		

00:41:35 --> 00:41:38

			link your children to the Prophet
Muhammad says and then make him
		

00:41:38 --> 00:41:42

			the role model, you will Wallahi
this is going to just cut out so
		

00:41:42 --> 00:41:46

			many problems that you might face
later on. If he's the role model,
		

00:41:46 --> 00:41:49

			you don't have to worry about what
they're going to be wearing, how
		

00:41:49 --> 00:41:51

			they're going to be acting who's
going to be different, because
		

00:41:51 --> 00:41:55

			this is who they love. This is who
they're attached to. Okay, and I
		

00:41:55 --> 00:41:58

			spoke of the hair and you could
weigh on this the way of dressing
		

00:41:58 --> 00:42:02

			the behavior, the hijab, certain
words or certain actions or manner
		

00:42:02 --> 00:42:07

			or attitudes. Are you articulate,
articulating your identity as an
		

00:42:07 --> 00:42:10

			American Muslim? Or are you
articulating your identity as
		

00:42:10 --> 00:42:14

			someone who wants to be liked, and
to be just accepted, and to be
		

00:42:14 --> 00:42:15

			just going along with the flow?
		

00:42:17 --> 00:42:20

			Something that we can internalize
and think about? Okay, so I'm
		

00:42:20 --> 00:42:22

			going to end up with that
inshallah. But I want you to sit
		

00:42:22 --> 00:42:26

			and think and Shala please refer
to whatever we took so far, what
		

00:42:26 --> 00:42:30

			are the seven things we cannot do
with our kids? Right? What are the
		

00:42:30 --> 00:42:32

			ways that the Prophet Muhammad has
approached how we spoke about
		

00:42:32 --> 00:42:36

			punishment or how it was totally
not allowed? It wasn't even okay,
		

00:42:36 --> 00:42:39

			how we spoke about punishing
sometimes for things that were not
		

00:42:39 --> 00:42:42

			even okay to punish for? What were
the challenges from Mercy from
		

00:42:42 --> 00:42:45

			understanding from finding what we
said, we have mercy with everybody
		

00:42:45 --> 00:42:48

			around us. We're understanding
what those around us. Let's bring
		

00:42:48 --> 00:42:51

			that mercy into our homes and shop
and try to bring back the family
		

00:42:51 --> 00:42:54

			together, punishing, or trying to
always be on the case of your
		

00:42:54 --> 00:42:58

			children only built this like
neglected and isolated islands
		

00:42:58 --> 00:43:01

			inside your home. And it doesn't
do any good. You're trying to
		

00:43:01 --> 00:43:04

			bring your family back together in
sha Allah. So with mercy and
		

00:43:04 --> 00:43:07

			guidance and trying to link your
kids to the Prophet Muhammad Salim
		

00:43:07 --> 00:43:10

			I think that's the best way. It's
the way I would say that, you
		

00:43:10 --> 00:43:13

			know, that your savior like how
they say, you know, they, they
		

00:43:13 --> 00:43:16

			throw that little though what's it
called?
		

00:43:17 --> 00:43:19

			What's it called? lifesaver, you
know, the lifesavers that's that's
		

00:43:19 --> 00:43:22

			your lifesaver, basically insha
Allah okay. So please try to refer
		

00:43:22 --> 00:43:25

			to that and you know, and try to
stick to it until again, as I
		

00:43:25 --> 00:43:25

			said,
		

00:43:26 --> 00:43:29

			Let's just end over here and then
after that, I'll discuss with each
		

00:43:29 --> 00:43:29

			other about the following
		

00:43:31 --> 00:43:32

			lectures inshallah.