Sajid Ahmed Umar – Successful Parenting #09

			If we look at the first story that I cite the use of it, salam, and yopu, salaam we have this young
boy use of. He's between the age of five and seven. And he sees this dream, and he goes to his
father. And he reveals the dream that my father I saw the sun in the moon and 11 stars prostrating
to
		

			the father is a prophet of Allah. He knows that this dream means that Allah has chosen my son.
		

			And through deduction, you understand that the Father is contemplating that what will happen if the
rest of my sons know about this dream? I'm trying to raise all My children, right? If they know
about this dream, it will become a tool for Shere Khan to use to sow enmity between them. Look how
deep he is, Jakob is not just taking the dream at face value here is thinking of the consequences of
the dream being released to the rest of the family. This is what a father does. Right? Yeah, he's
not just winging it, is he's being a father. Right? So he tells his son laptops,
		

			do not mention this dream to your breakfast.
		

			This is a command.
		

			But he doesn't stop at the command.
		

			This is what we need to do. We need to ponder how his home is different to our homes. Today. Many of
our homes are military bases, we just give commands. If you're a mother, you have your stripes. If
you're a father, you have your stripes, who is the general who's the sergeant, all we do is give
commands to our children do this, don't do that. And then we get angry when they don't listen.
That's our parental philosophy, right? We give the commandment then we dish out that punishment.
Right? We never teach them why. Right? And in modern day, science in terms of psychology, they
actually state that if you give you if you instruct a child without explaining your instruction,
		

			then children are inquisitive. They're curious, they might listen to you instruction when they with
you because they're scared of you. But when you're not there, they don't experiment to say, let's
see what happens if I do it. Right. Let's see what happens if I do it. So we run our homes in the
military way where we dish out commands, and we don't expect feedback and don't accept feedback. We
think about raising our kids how our parents raised us, or our grandparents raised our parents,
right there if the child today questions his mother or father, what would we say? Hola. Hola, hola,
De La Villa, where the disrespectful son you are, you know, when your grandfather used to talk to
		

			us, when we were young, we used to sit like this. Whenever you see we'll look at his eyes. And you
can look at our eyes and ask us things. I told you don't do this, and you telling me but you do it.
		

			In case you didn't get the memo, Brothers and Sisters in Islam, this is the upgraded version of
children, this is Windows something else. You running on the previous version, you better move with
the times, right? Because a lot of software is not compatible with your software at the moment, you
need to upgrade your operating system. This is a different child in a different century. Their minds
are stimulated in different ways. If you're going to tell them not to do something whilst you're
doing it, they're going to tell you but why do you do it? I don't think you can just tell them do as
I say don't do as I do something to catch it. It doesn't work in this century. They're going to do
		

			it to see what happens if I do it. Right. Right. I was I was watching this
		

			speech that was given by these Toastmaster
		

			candidates and the person who wanted was talking about, you know, his discussions with his son. And
he says I had a son who likes to write on the walls. So you know, I tell my son, that don't write on
the walls. And you know what, the next day he looked at me and you write on the board. That's how
dirty the children are, right? It's a different generation Brothers and Sisters in Islam. The point
is, your uncle is teaching us the correct parental philosophy. He commands his son, but He explains
the command. He says for your key to like a Qaeda, my son, if you tell them about your dream, the
atrocities
		

			he explains why you shouldn't do it. But he doesn't stop there. Brothers and Sisters in Islam. He
realizes and this is what the father is doing. This is parenting in practice. He's thinking that all
these are the years I've been teaching my child that you know, his brothers are his protectors. As
brothers, you must be United Blood is thicker than water. There shouldn't be enmity between you or
you all and so on and so forth. He's thinking about this that, you know, how will you receive my
instruction now, when I tell him that these brothers who I told you are your protectors right now
I'm telling you if you tell them about this binder project things, no doubt Jacobi is contemplating.
		

			So what does he do? He goes to teach he goes on to teach
		

			just chat about shaper. He says in the shape on lily insanity, or Doom movie that indeed shape on to
mankind is a clear that my dear son, look, whatever they do if they do it, they're responsible for
doing it. But don't forget, share pawns row
		

			in the math.
		

			Now, these are lessons being passed on to a boy at a very young age. And if you contemplate this,
you learn from the Quran that your child is never too young to learn. And you shouldn't have this
philosophy that they too young leave them ignorant later on. We'll teach them later on. We'll teach
them later on. We'll teach them doesn't work like that Brothers and Sisters in Islam.
		

			If you don't teach them, the TV will teach them. The internet will teach them. Right. The neighbor's
kids will teach them
		

			right the street will teach them they have minds that are like magnets, they absorb whatever is
around them if you not, if you learn, you know first in charge, in terms of what goes into their
mind, don't think they'll remain ignorant. They won't remain ignorant. They will become educated
from other sources.