Safi Khan – Soul Food The Harms of Careless Speech
AI: Summary ©
The speakers discuss the importance of community and practicality in speaking to people, the difficulty of communicating with people who are not speaking English, and the importance of praying and learning to convince oneself about the meaning of words. They also mention Facebook's use of social media and its use of kn Transport, as factors in their tests. The use of Facebook's platform, kn Transport, is a major factor, and the importance of knowing the meaning of words and the value of knowledge in one's life is discussed.
AI: Summary ©
Do
you understand what I just said?
So I go I'm
not sure what's going on
as your brother I'm seeing your brother in a long time
Oh nice. How long have you offered the like the basically like middle
of January call middle of January
okay love a new year and you stayed for Okay, so like almost
like two three weeks then. Oh wow. Mashallah, enjoy, obviously.
That's awesome.
Yeah, actually so there's really funny story behind this. I'm not
wearing this because actually, like, I am a Harry Potter fan, but
it's not like I actually wear it. There was there was a time where
like, my wife and I were in Orlando. And anybody moved to
Florida before don't go there. It's not really worth it. Yeah,
it's like it's it's like something you do you have to do it almost.
So we were there and it was like October and so October in Florida
is like you just assume it's like 70 degree weather and we woke up
one morning and it was like 46 degrees.
And like we had like an entire outdoor day kind of like planned
out and stuff like that. So you know, we were already in and
Orlando was like this giant touristy city right? Like I don't
know what other city to compare it to. It's like almost like LA and
like away it's like, like, it just benefits so much from tourism.
So we just like went there and bought like scarves because we're
freezing and the scarves ended up being like Harry Potter scarves. I
actually I actually wear the scarf one time when I give a flipbook. I
got called up mad called out for by people in the congregation
delay oh my god II mom's wearing Hogwarts.
I was like, just pray even count like
it was rough, but
Well, hamdulillah No, it's it was good. is good.
And obviously it was like, like $800 for one scarf. So yeah, no,
it was it was like 40 bucks for the scarf. Yeah, it's ridiculous.
It makes no sense. Like logically it just does not appeal to the
senses at all. Yeah, but this card but it gave me an agenda bro.
Okay.
Okay, so I'm actually going to just fullscreen this really
quickly for everybody and just zoom in some more.
Okay, awesome.
All right.
There's been level hamdulillah Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah wa
ala alihi wa sahbihi. Edge Marine, said I'm welcome everybody. Hope
everyone in Sharla is doing well. Well rested, rejuvenated. How many
of y'all are online right now? For school left for classes coming up?
Anyone online for the next like, week or two foreseeable future?
Okay. Anybody? Other Other Other y'all assuming back in person?
Everyone's back in person. Okay, good. Hunger. I mean, you just got
to kind of keep going, I guess. And to some degree, if you're
vaccinated and stuff like that, he's got to keep grinding away,
right? It's just life. I mean, no one really anticipated this thing
happening. Like a month and a half ago, everyone was kind of getting
used to like just the normal life going back to what it was. And
then all of a sudden, boom, this thing happens. And it almost feels
like like back in like April 2020. Right, everyone's like losing
their minds.
100, you know, on the lower or at least, you know, continuing on
with our community stuff and being together, it's very, very
important part of what we do here. So today, we're inshallah going to
be going over a very, very short, but sweet Hadith. I think this
hadith is really amazing, and a couple of different ways.
This hadith is very applicable, I will say, super applicable. It's
less theoretical, and more applicable. And I like that, you
know, and this kind of goes to it's a testament to what the
Prophet SAW Selim used to do, is that he was not just a person who
used to speak theory. He used to also speak practicality. He
wouldn't just give people theoretical advice. Anybody know
people that just give theoretical advice. You're like, what you
actually want me to do and you're like, I don't know, right? Like,
they're like, Yo, go be good. You're like, what's that mean?
Bro? Like, what do you mean be good? Like, what am I supposed to
do? Right? And the Prophet was the perfect balance of theory and
practice. And that was who he was in his life, right? He didn't lean
too far to the left or too far to the right. He was a very balanced
person and his advice giving so this hadith is really really
really amazing. So I'll read it in Arabic and I'll have someone
translated for me inshallah. Whoever wants to read the English
part. So the Hadith it reads and this is, by the way, in the books
of Imam Timothy, this hadith it says, a blue moon what killin Bill
monkey? Okay, very short Hadith. And so somebody want to translate
that for me real quick. in English. Akram, go ahead.
Okay, very good. affliction, Allah
Hello, my work killin Bill monkey, okay comes from loose talk or it
comes from like, frivolous careless talk, all right? And you
won't say it, guess what that means? I didn't want to, like,
take a shot.
Like talking. Like, it's like filling space. Okay? Okay, when
you're talking to talk, okay, when you're just trying to fill space
very good. Anyone else want to give a idea what this hadith could
possibly mean?
Okay, there's no benefit. Okay? What else?
Anyone else? That affliction comes from? loose talk. It's kind of
like a short but like leaves a little bit to be desired in terms
of like, what it could possibly mean.
Okay, so I mentioned that like, it's just kind of like word
filling, right? Just talk to talk anyone else?
There's a couple of different means we're gonna talk about
today. I want to take a guess. Sisters, girls, anyone? We all
think, loose talk. What does that mean?
Like
vague, so like, not specific, just kind of speaking broadly. Okay.
Anyone else?
So vague. Word filling. Who else?
It's like, loose.
Okay.
We're not as direct. Like, you might say something that may or
may not about right. Okay. Okay, very good. Very good. It may or
may not have happened not really sure how valid this speech was.
Right? It's like kind of like, you know, just blabbing on about
something on your essay paper, y'all Prusa i know. You're like
Yo, you got five pages. I got you in four and a half right? You're
like
you'd never get one more word enemy. Okay, very good. All right,
so let's let's go ahead and Sharla and kind of like translate a
little bit about what the first word is right so what's the first
word you guys see up there? Somebody can you read that first
translation for me like the first word their affliction albala
Right. affliction what is affliction? How would you guys
define affliction? Somebody who showed somebody share something
with me.
Problems what else? affliction what else?
misunderstandings. Okay. Very good. What else?
What else? What else?
afflictions problems, misunderstandings, any other
definition of affliction?
Tests Very good. Anyone else? Test misunderstandings. What else? Yes.
Blessing desktop, when a blessing gets stopped. Very interesting.
Okay. Anyone else? You have something?
No. Okay. So let's let's look at something real quick. Okay. So
Allah in the Quran actually defines Bella in a verse in the
Quran and actually specifically, is talking a little bit about the,
the story of Ibrahim Ali has set up. Okay. And Allah subhana wa
Tada. It's also sofort. He's talking about the trial that
Ibrahim alayhis salam was given with his son, and one of the most
famous trolls and Ibrahim was given a lot of trials. But one of
the most infamous trials of the Prophet, the Prophet Ibrahim Ali
salaam was given was this order to sacrifice his son, right? And
everyone knows about this, where he, you know, was it was given
Ibrahim was given this kind of divine revelation, or divine kind
of intervention that Allah said, if you are truly and Ibrahim was
Khalil, Allah, right, he was like, this friend is close friend of
Allah, if you're going to be worthy of that status, we will
test you a little bit more than the average person. Right? And
this also kind of like proves something very interesting is that
all tests and trials are not inherently bad. Right? And we'll
define this at the end a little bit. Okay. Some of the teachings
of our scholars are very, very beautiful, where they define a
test and a trial. That's one that's bad is one that actually
takes you away from God. But what if a test or a trial brings you
closer to Allah? Was that inherently bad in and of itself?
Right? Like I had to kind of learn the hard way as people say
nowadays, right? So in this kind of story of Prophet Ibrahim Allah
who said, he was told to sacrifice his son, okay, and when he went to
sacrifice him and he actually even asked his son what he thought
about this and this was just a character of the Anbiya you know,
fun Varma, that Tara, what do you think about this, right? How do
you feel about this? And by the way, Ibraheem Alehissalaam and the
other NBA, they did not have a choice but to follow to follow
through with what Allah subhanho wa Taala ordered them to do. It's
not like us, Allah tells us Hey, yo, there's a fajr prayer, right?
You gotta wake up early am you're like, Yo, I got exams though,
right? Like,
are you sure that's for me? Like, maybe for the guy next to me,
right? But like, I don't know if he has biochem exam at 830. Like
we start making excuses. We start kind of feeling one or one way or
the other, about certain commands that Allah gives us. And this is
kind of just like the general reason why we're just not
prophetic people to a certain degree. We try to be prophetic,
but we fall short a lot. Right? And there's a reason why, you
know, if you guys were wondering like how the Allah subhanaw taala
chooses
prophets, because these were people that were hand chosen by
Allah. They weren't just random. Right? Even though the prophesy
Saddam was a man Ibrahim was a man Musa Einstein was a man he had a
he had a mother and a father prophesy, someone had a mother and
a father. And this was one of the ways that the people that time of
their time, they used to actually try to take shots at them. Like
you're just like me. You're just like me, you you breathe, you eat,
you marry you, you die one day. Why? Why are you the Prophet? What
makes you a prophet and not meat? Right? This is the arrogance of
humanity. But the reality is that it's not about like, what they're
made up that made them profits in terms of physicality. What made
them profits was well it wasn't here. That's what made them
profits if you look at the Prophet SAW Salem, this slide right here,
is there is there anything really close to what we are honestly, I
know we try but but but he was up here and we're just trying to get
there to that level. And so after he was you know, Ibrahim was given
this order Allah subhanaw taala. After all of that, he says in the
hat that Allah who will biller will move in that this was a truly
this was this was a testing trial for you. Right? So below is
something that's very it's a trial. It's a tribulation, it's
difficult. It's not easy. It's not easy at all. It's something that
the human being struggles going through. It's not something that
anybody wants nobody should want a trial you know, sometimes like
there's this weird kind of like, I don't know there's weird culture
nowadays with people who are like yeah, man, I guess I just gotta
learn the hard way Brother stop it
like don't want Don't Don't Don't don't think you have to learn the
hard way right there's actually and this is kind of like you know,
it's not like authentic so he's there he but you can kind of take
some lessons from this that you know, Prophet use of it himself.
Everyone heard a prophet use of it. What was it what was his his
defining characteristic that everyone knows about?
Beauty right beauty beautiful man. MashAllah right? Amazing like a
human being the prophesy sudden when he saw him in the struggle in
the Mirage he said that I swear Allah gave half of the beauty of
creation to this one man and the rest of the half to everybody
else. That's how beautiful he was right? So everyone name user
they're like, Yeah, bro, me you know, mom's Mom's got their name
right this time? And I like but really jokes aside you know, he
was a beautiful man and to be quite honest with you a lot of
things that people deem like good qualities of people can actually
be their most most testing quality everyone's like man that guy so
good looking he must have like everything he wants oh my god this
girl is like so wealthy Masha Allah career super successful, she
must have everything she wants, how do you know that wealth is not
the most the true most testing thing in her life?
How do you know his like appearance is not the most testing
thing in his life and to be quite honest with you probably use of
adding his serum his beauty was one of the defining reasons for
why he was so tested in this dunya
right, and this conversation we had about not wanting tests and
trials you know, the whole you know, Chapter of Prophet use of it
his setup you know, when he walked into the to that hall and you
know, so they ha and the other people the other woman in the city
were cutting these fruits or cutting this you know, whatever
food it was, and they began to cut their own hands the Quran like
talks about this. And they all tried to basically kind of you
know, impose their will on him and profit use of it. He said, I made
a prophetic prophetic statement, Ya Allah make the prison more
appealing to me than what they call me to. And there was a
scholar who actually said is very, very interesting. There's a
scholar who actually said that had use of it he said, I'm asked Allah
for Afia like I mean, like just you know, relieve him of all the
you know, tests and trials Allah could have possibly given it to
him but it was because Prophet use of it his salon even just said,
you know, I want to be you know, given something other than this.
Oh, they're calling me to the Allah actually gave him prison.
You know, Allah gave him what he wanted. Allah gave him the other.
All right, and so when it comes to just kind of trials and
tribulations, a person shouldn't you know, and obviously use of
iclm Obviously, being a prophet, he knew what he was doing and
Allah had it in his other for use have to go to prison, but for you
and I don't ask for difficulty. Don't be like, Yeah, you know
what? I guess I just gotta go to this party to learn the hard way,
bro. Like, No, dude, listen, your mom, man. Like, seriously, you had
a friend that's like, giving you advice and you don't like it?
Yeah, man. Shoot, you don't know. Right? Like, I guess I was gonna
go find out who this person is myself. If I got burned, I got
burner notes. Your objective should not be to get burned.
Your objective should be to save yourself from that sort of pain.
Right? So Albula is like this kind of trial that you don't want.
Right? And so this hadith, it comes from actually a bigger a
longer Hadith where the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he
says, From Lisanna come okay on Tofu.
Tofu, and then he continues guard your tongue, lest you might utter
something that you may be tested by
felt guide your tongue guard your tongue. Okay? Don't just say the
first thing that comes to your mouth or your mind. Right? Because
indeed, affliction comes and this is where you get the rest of this
hadith, Ella Bella.
Mala Mala cologne, Bill monthly, that affliction comes from loose
talk. So I want to take a minute here really quickly, I'm gonna
pause, I want to ask you guys a question. Take one minute, I want
to pause here for one minute. Take one minute, I want you to talk to
the person next to you. You know what, 30 seconds I got time, one
minute, 30 seconds 30 seconds. Talk to the person next to you to
think of one side effect of loose Carolus speech. Okay, what's a
side effect of it? You know, when scholars like deduce like diseases
of the heart, one of the things that they actually do is look for
symptoms and side effects. So for example, if somebody is struggling
with arrogance, right, it's not as easy as be like, yeah, that dudes
arrogant. I know. How do you know what Brother? Just knowing? You
know, you always think like, tick tock guy, Sammy. Yeah, he's like,
he's like, was like the suck, bro. I just know. Like, like, no don't
like, you know, you don't know, you have to kind of identify
certain symptoms and side effects of why you're going through
certain things. Like for example, a side effect or a symptom of
arrogance may be that you can't hear other people being
complimented in front of you.
That could be a side effect of arrogance, right? You cannot
handle a conversation in a group of people when it's not centered
around you. side effect of arrogance whatever somebody has
something good happening in their life and Inkling a part of you
feels uncomfortable side effects of arrogance. So take 30 seconds,
talk to the person next to you and talk just a little bit about what
possible side effects of loose or careless talk can actually be
alright, so I'm just gonna go for it
shouldn't be does not have to do this. Why is why is it even
sitting here bro? Why should I sitting here man? Why isn't he
sitting up here? Why am I why am I not in the back like facing the
wall
thank you
all right. 20 seconds. 20 seconds. There we go. Get some good stuff
all right. Bismillah 10 seconds. Here we go. Everyone wrap their
thoughts up really quickly in sha Allah. Put that put that bow on
top. Finishing touches.
All right.
Here we go. All right, so let's hear it. What are some of the side
effects? Some of the symptoms of loose or careless speech? This man
left for start? Who was a brave soul?
Subhanallah Here we go.
You overshare your own Guinea
Subhanallah you overshare your feelings. Okay. Very very
interested in.
Only love your beloved so much that if they become your enemy, it
doesn't harm. Hola, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. So
oversharing. Right? What when you're feeling so comfortable in
front of somebody so quickly, that you end up just giving away too
much too quickly. It's a serious issue nowadays, by the way.
Everyone gets too comfortable. The internet has like, basically
expedited that process. Right? Like, oh, check this out. I got
this degree, homie. You don't know somebody don't like you.
Probably got more enemies than friends. Right? Okay, good. Very,
very good. Very good. Check with me started us off real high. So we
got we gotta climb even higher and shallows go anyone else?
misunderstandings. Okay, like meaning like, how would you like
describe misunderstandings?
Like somebody says,
actually within methods.
Yeah.
isn't exactly
okay. You get the wrong idea. Okay. Okay. Very good. So
misunderstand, you get the wrong idea, wrong impression of what
someone was trying to say. I would honestly say if you want to kind
of contextualize that issue in today's day and age, is that we
have way too many conversations that are not face to face.
You all agree with that? How many? How many? How many times do we
feel that people like misconstrue misunderstand things over text
messages? When easily if you care enough about that conversation to
have
but in person, all of that could have been avoided. So at least
like weeks of like animosity and assumptions that are not good of
another person who you should have good assumptions of. But it's bad
assumption because you just there was there was there was non
clarity in the conversation very good was your name? Liana okay
very awesome Very good. All right brothers what we got? Yes.
You lose value of your words explain. So like you talk a lot
like you're just talking to me like
you're just talking to talking. Like you
Subhan Allah subhanaw taala
right, there's a hadith blessed to be Jalama and Kalam. Right the
prophesy son said, I've been sent to you with brevity in my speech,
right? I was wondering that y'all were wondering that like, I don't
know if this is like just like me being like a weird Muslim, I
guess. But like, I just wonder like, if the province Olson was
here in 2022, like what type of a community member would he be? You
know, saying like, we have so many characters row. You know, we have
like, you know, Uncle Sal, Mashallah. And then you got
aunties. Right? And then you have like, your like energetic, young,
super woke intellectual, like college students. And then you got
like, the, the height of the careless high schoolers. I wonder
what the province lesson would be like, if he was here in 2022,
because we hear these stories about him 1400 years ago, but I
wonder like, contextually what he would be like, in 2022. There's so
many like, different like, there's so many different variables
nowadays. Right? So how a lot right, but I mean, but but one of
the reason why I'm saying this acronym is because like to kind
of, you know, back you up on what you mentioned, is that like, I
don't think he would be obsessed with like this kind of over just
talking tradition that we have nowadays. Right? He just kind of
be on the quieter side. Maybe only speak when necessary. You know?
Subhanallah Very good. All right. Anyone else? Let's Another side
effect. Another symptom of Kerala speech.
Another symptom, somebody give me another one. I want to pick on you
guys, bro, I got my teaching degree, dude. All right, go ahead.
Oh, I was gonna say that. They kind of lose trust in what you
say. Like, if you if you're oversharing
Cha. Interesting. So like, basically, he's saying that like,
if you overshare then there's like a lack of trust between you and
other people. Okay, like, this person just talks to everybody and
Blabs on about everything to everyone. So there's really no
like, person, you know, like, just, you know, just kind of
intimacy and conversation with close friends or close circles.
Right? Like you tell this person one thing that was very important
to you, and you don't have any confidence that this will stay
very close. It might reach to a completely different group of
people by the end of the day, right? Very good. Very, very good.
Anyone else? waste time? Wasting time? What do you mean by that?
waste time?
Yeah, okay. Yeah, that's it like you just keep on like
wasting your time. Mashallah, man. He's on this one tonight. Right?
He's on this one. He's on it tonight. I couldn't like I
couldn't like Yo, people talk too much nowadays. He's like, he's
like, I couldn't mashallah is like a 60 year old man in the body of
like a 19 year old bro. I love it. I love buses, bro. He's He's, he's
awesome. He's awesome gondola. Anyone else? Sisters? Yeah, what's
up?
Sorry, rumors, okay.
Yeah, no, I feel you, I feel you. Okay. So you say something and
somebody else starts saying something and just backbiting
starts happening. And then before you know it, you are those aunties
and uncles you made fun of right? You end up being like that. It's
concerning, right? It's very, very concerning. I want to I just want
to share a couple things with you guys real quickly in sha Allah,
okay. There's a scholar I love I'm gonna we are gonna holla he
actually said three things as a side effect of this, you know,
loose speech to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was
talking about, number one. Number one, he says, a person would be at
ease and peace, so long as they kept quiet. When a person speaks,
he will be judged or she will be judged according to everything
that came out of their mouth.
So he's stating here that it is actually if you want to be safe.
Look, if you want to save yourself, there's actually a
hadith. Abdullah ibn Ahmad Radi Allahu taala. And he said that the
prophets of Allah hadI was when he says that Verily, Allah despises
Allah despises the the extravagant speaker amongst people.
Allah doesn't like it. Like Allah is not a fan of people who like
talk extravagantly. So Akram is like vibing with Allah right now,
right? He's like, Man, I hate them through bro. Right? Like the
process and he said, he said he said, Allah doesn't like those who
speak extravagantly. Who flaps his or her tongue, like a cow would
flap their tongue.
In the province of Islam is like basically like making an analogy
with an animal and just being honest with you like in majority
of like Hadith tradition like being compared to an animal is not
good
there's even in the Quran right in the Quran anybody reads fossil
fuel before right the story of the elephant Allah Tala K for Fallout
Abu can be as high will feel Allah calls those people as How will
feel the companions of the elephant. By bro these dudes were
so like dumb, they're like friends or animals, they don't have human
beings that are like companions of theirs. There are that
intelligence level, you know, I'm saying. So Allah is saying that
like a person who talks too much or blabbers on and on and on, it's
not the comparison of like a cow that just like continues to chew
and eat food. Just just keeps on going. Just keeps on going, bro,
at least the cows eating. You're not doing anything. You're just
talking for talking sake. Right. And so, and this is one of the
most interesting things. So there was another beautiful beautiful
narration here that you know that was that speak what is good and
acquire gains or refrain from speaking evil and be safe.
Right, speak good and acquire reward. So speak good acquire
reward. This is where that beautiful Hadith comes from.
Right? Oh, you who believe? Okay. Oh, you who believe in Allah. And
in the era? Right? Speak. Good. Right, failure. Cool. Hi, Ron. Oh,
what's the last part? Be quiet last month? Right? Speak good, or
just be quiet? How many of us honestly, do this exercise?
Seriously, do this exercise? Do this actually one that I wanted to
actually see. I want to do this myself. And I want to ask you guys
to do it as well. I know it's hard. But try to do this one days,
try to at the end of the day, like before you go to sleep, try to
keep a count of what you said that day.
Try to keep a copy of what you said that day. And to be quite
honest with you. If we cannot remember more than half the things
that we said there's a problem.
There's a problem.
That means we literally within a 24 hour period cannot remember the
things that came out of our mouth.
And the prophets awesome. He talks about this, dude, you're going to
be asked about that stuff on the Day of Judgment. It doesn't matter
if you forgot about it. It's been written for you. Like hey, you
know Fatuma. On this day, January, you know, whatever day today is
20/21 Did you say XYZ to this person? thought through I might be
like No, I don't remember that at all. Actually, I don't remember
that. I don't think I even said it. I don't know it's right here.
You said it. It's right here got receipts and everything right? At
that moment, think about the panic that will overwhelm the heart. Oh
my god that I really say that if I said that, how many other things
that I say. So the first thing that one of the scholars teaches
us is stay safe, stay safe and be quiet in moments where you don't
want to like risk that you know, there's like a there's this kind
of like teaching in Islam. Right? And there's a there's a very
beautiful sutra that talks about the sorts of spiritual rot where
Allah Tada. He says, You have lived in an understandable
cathedral may not have been in the bow the bunny ism. He says, oh,
people, you know who believe avoid much assumption. Avoid much
assumption. Verily, in a bow Allah, some of them, bow the bunny
ism. Some of those assumptions will be evil will be bad will be
wrong. Because a natural argument for a person was like, Yeah, you
know what, like, yeah, I make assumptions. I say a lot of stuff.
But I can guarantee you some of that stuff might be good.
Right? We try to kind of play devil's advocate like with our own
goodness, we're like, yeah, no, but I'm pretty good, though. I may
do some stupid things, but like, I'm pretty good. No, Islam tells
you just stay safe. Don't play that game. Because even if some of
it is bad, that that is heavy. And I'm saying that makes sense to you
guys. Like you got you guys kind of get where that's coming from,
like Islam says like, don't play the like the numbers. You know,
we're like, very like numerical people as Muslims forever. Like,
yeah, well, you know, 49 good sayings. 30. Bad sayings. 49 is
good, right. I don't know what if that those 30 things that were bad
are actually heavier than the 49 that were good.
Ask yourself that question. Right. Super, super important. All right.
The second thing that he mentioned, he's a person is
discouraged to speak before verifying and knowing the validity
of what he or she is saying, who mentioned that somebody here
mentioned that, like verifying and making sure something is true
before they say that before they say it right. I think I think
Abdullah or whoever will somebody was mentioning it here that like
this idea of just kind of like speaking without knowing if
something is right or not. Right. And I'll tell you what, I'm gonna
see if you can kind of like feel me here. One of the most common
places where this disease is found is in social gatherings
where somebody is just like so willing to just be a part of
something that they don't care if what they're saying is right or
wrong. I just got to bring some juicy news to this conversation.
There was actually a paper that was released recently by like
Oxford. I remember like I read it a week ago, where somebody said
were the researcher actually stated that one of the biggest
anxieties of social gatherings in today's modern world is a person
feeling that they don't have anything to put into the
conversation act.
Like you're just sitting there is kind of listening. That brings
anxiety in people. You know what we call that back? 1400 years ago?
Hadith.
You think every time the prophets have spoken like, yeah, okay, let
me talk a little bit more over you know, dude, when he spoke there,
like,
just sat there. Just soaked it up. We suck at listening, dude. We
suck at listening nowadays. Nobody listens anymore. And you know
what's even worse than that, I want to see if you guys can like
picture yourself in this situation. How many of y'all have
caught yourself? Or other people when you're talking or somebody
else's talking? You can see the listener already formulating an
answer?
Yeah, Rob, protect us, man. That's the worst thing ever.
Like when you're talking to somebody and that person, you can
tell they're zoned out because they're already thinking of their
rebuttal to you.
How can you give me a rebuttal if you didn't even let me finish what
I have to say?
You just gotta, you just gotta say something. I just have to say, I
gotta get that last punch. And I gotta get that last job in there.
Because me being quiet is like my worst nightmare. Because if I'm
quiet, I don't know if like, you know, people will think that I'm
like, worthy of being a part of this group. If I'm quiet, it's
like, kind of awkward. I don't know if like, you know, they
really want me to be a part of this. If I'm quiet, man, I'm just
like that weird kid out. The province was just like, No, no
dude. Being quiet, sometimes it's good.
Being quiet. Sometimes it's actually this kind of intellect.
Right? There's a statement in English that the dumbest dog barks
the loudest. Right? That like sometimes the least intelligent
people are the loudest in the room. The most intelligent people
sometimes are the quietest people in the room.
I've learned this throughout my life with like, so many people,
experiences family members, friends, everyone.
They're the people, unfortunately, nowadays, and today's culture, to
be quite honest with you has promoted this, where like, if
you're good at speaking, if you're good at like writing, if you're
good at like all these, like different kinds of like, outward
things, outward forms of communication, and you're
obviously smart. Have you thought about like, right, like growing
up? How many of y'all got like dot points in school because you
didn't like raise your hand to participate? All right, the
teachers like you say something, you're like, just naturally a shy
person. But you got penalized for being shy.
The professionalism didn't do that to people, you know, some people
were just naturally quiet. And that's okay. You know, some people
were allowed. Some people were quiet, this all part of the
prophetic community. Okay, the last one I wanted to share with
everybody here. And we'll end with this intro and open up for some
kind of conversation and q&a here is that the scholar he mentions, a
person is discouraged from picking out and speaking about the faults
of other people.
That's the last thing he says about this hadith. Number one was
a person should stay safe and be quiet because you're, you're more
so in the safe zone when you're quiet. Because when you start
speaking, if you're held accountable, number two, is that
you should verify. And then make sure that what you're speaking is
truth. And not just frivolous, not lies, right? The third thing he
mentions is stay very wary of talking about the faults of other
people. And there's a hadith actually, I'm glad you're sharing
with us, your shaman we've been and I did this hadith about like a
few months ago, or like a couple of maybe like four or five months
ago where we talked about this hadith where the Prophet SAW and
he says, Do not rejoice over the misfortune of other people, lest
Allah takes the calamity or the test away from them and gives it
to you.
In other words, in modern day context, what goes around comes
around,
you're gonna sit there and like, really cool somebody else's issues
and problems. And be like, Oh man, like this person, and that person
and this and that, and that all that stuff. And you think like,
you're out here like sitting on your high throne, talking about
how bad this other person is? How do you know that Allah will not
save them from their trial and tribulation and just the next day
give it to you? Because you feel so high about it. Right? This is
one of the biggest lessons man and one of the another kind of like,
small piece of like, mental homework that I want everyone to
do this week. And to kind of think about this a little bit, is ask
yourself genuinely, when we have social gatherings, right? Y'all
ever heard like, where there's like, gatherings of like, you
know, the remembrance of Allah like the mullah Iike they stop and
join in. Ask yourself, the gatherings that you have that are
we have like with our friends and our social circles. Would the
minute you stop and sit or would they run far away from us? Because
they can't stand what's being said.
Right?
and honestly like a tangible thing to do is ask yourself if the
subject of our conversations are centered around talking of other
people, or staying away from talking about other people.
I remember one time I was giving this like high school, like kind
of Holika and it was about like friendship and companionship and I
said, a true group of friends can find things to talk about other
than people.
Like if you sit with your circle, and you can find like common
interests that don't have to revolve around like Ebola and a
crumb and you know, Fatuma and you know, you know, Xena like if you
if you can keep away from that your friends are real your friends
are for real? Talk about crypto bro I don't care
like what like Why does it always have to revolve around like human
beings like talking to a man like you know what? This person that
Subhanallah bro I don't care how much of the car you throw in that
conversation bro is still bad. Right? Oh Subhanallah you
just said quietly to yourself bro like make dua for them personally
stopped bringing their mess out in front of everybody else. You know?
And you know, that's something that that the scholar kind of ends
this hadith off. So this hadith very, very beautiful. Right? This
hadith and I'll just repeat it one more time. I LaBella. Oh, what?
kealan Bill Minh Bill monthly, right? The promises and he says
that affliction trials and tribulation comes from this
frivolous loose talk and loose speech. We ask Allah subhanaw
taala to protect us. And we ask Allah subhanaw taala to allow us
to stay far away from the people of loose and careless speech.
Because at the end of the day, we want to make sure that all of our
deeds are quality heavy, and will be DISA get us closer to Allah and
His Jana, and not further away from Alon his parents. I mean, no,
but I mean, Charlotte, anybody have any sort of questions,
comments, concerns, checking with beans here, so I'm just gonna let
him do the rest of the session as well.
Got anything, anything? Any, any any sort of reminder that you want
to add on to this hadith?
Yes, interpretations that came to light when I first read it is
that, like some of the stuff where you lose value of some of the
things that you do, say, and values of like words that you bear
a lot of weight. So one thing that immediately came to mind is like
the use of law speeches, like on a daily basis, and like, mostly
throwing it out that talk to you about it.
It was just like, that's the one thing that came to mind. Because
like,
the problems that can come with it if you'd like falsely, say it or
say it like very loosely, to be like a really big deal to person
without like realizing it.
Yeah, yeah, it kind of goes back to that point where we're like,
we're, we're talking about the idea of like, the, the, the
heaviness of the sin outweighs whatever chance of truth, you may
have spoken, you know, it's just like, it's like a smart person
would make that decision just to stay away from it. You know, this
is what we call in Islam, it's a concept called water. Water is
like just just staying away, you know, caution, being a little bit
like skeptic about going towards something. Because we don't want
to take the risk of like having that sin, you know, put up on our
shoulders. It's not something that I want to risk with my soul.
Right? Very good. Anyone else want to share anything? Anything
contextual?
Man, loose talk. It's crazy, bro. It's really scary, man. It is one
of the scariest things and it is something that is so ordinary for
all of us. And this is why I said this hadith is very applicable.
That is something that like we do, you know, we're just kicking it,
killing time with people that we like,
you know, something that started off as harmless became very
harmful. You know, and this is why I always ask people, you know,
like, and, you know, and this was another kind of small thing I want
to share with everybody here is that if somebody goes through
something like this, and this is true with all sin, you know,
whether it's small or large, whatever it may be, when it comes
to sinning, one of the things that we were taught, you know,
especially by like a lot of our Imams like growing up when we were
kids was don't justify sins. Like if you struggle with something,
it's okay. It's okay. Right? Because a lot of people are born
with different characteristics, right? Not everyone will be quiet.
Some people are like, just super extroverted human beings. I love
talking. Right? You can put them in a room and Subhanallah man, let
that tape recorder go out like it's gone. Right? Like, it's like
that things zoom and like, you put this person on, like, if you
don't, there's like people you put on like, slow down, like, like
point five, like, you know, like, speed and there's like, still like
at 1.5% speed like me, like a lot of reward some people you know,
and it's part of that character person characteristic. And so, you
know, one of the things is that, you know, if a person does
struggle with that, it's not you know, like, it's not it's not like
you know, shameful to struggle with a sin. But what is shameful
is you justifying that that sin is something that's not good. You
know, like, for example, if like, I'm like, oh, yeah, and this was
one of my
biggest pet peeves about, you know, just the general kind of
like, you know, Islamic kind of culture that we've, you know,
cultivated is that people are starting to like act like oh, it's
not a big deal. like nothing's a big deal, you know? Oh yeah
Muslims are supposed to pray but like, you can't if you want to
learn how have you been bro like we're likes boys are not fitna
like, you know, like, like, you know you don't have to pray no
there's lily in an interview I remember seeing like, have like a
it was a Muslim. I believe it was like an actor entertainer or
something like that he made a movie where like, a part of like,
the movie included, like a scene about like him going through the
classic like, you know, being yelled at by your parents. Did you
pray? And he was like, downstairs in his basement he like yeah, he's
like Yeah, mom I prayed and like he like basically like just stays
down there for like two minutes and then comes back up and just
lies about it. And so the interviewer this is really
interesting because this is a responsibility upon Muslim because
they asked Muslims about this stuff like Oh, in the movie you
portrayed that Muslims don't have to, like do you have to pray? And
and the guy literally Muslim guy who's like, yeah, you know you're
supposed to but it's okay if you don't know No, bro. That's a huge
statement. You can just go around saying stuff like that. Like if
you struggle praying then you know Ha, sir. Allah will Allah will
make things easy for you. Right? Put your head down, put get the
work, you know, Allah will make things easy for you. But don't
just be like, Yeah, I don't. I don't know how to pray. You know?
No, you should pray. If you have a problem cursing that Subhanallah
that we I was I was joking around about this with the youth on
Sundays, and I know shaking, moving will Bible this 100%
There's a new like bend of Islam where like, people going out here
like justifying smoking weed is hot out. Like, legit. No, like,
legit. There's actually like, there's actually like arguments
about it now. Like, oh, actually, you know, it's not the same as
cigarettes, you know, let's look at but you know, and like, like,
they read like one page of like Google Fit, and they think they're
scholars. Like, it happens. It really happens. It's crazy. So,
but it all stems honestly down to like this idea that like, we have
just gotten very used to the culture of just justifying what we
do. And that's not okay. Right? Struggle with something, call us
it's fine. Everyone struggles with their own individual problems, but
don't just start convincing yourself. Forget about other
people. You don't have to convince other people stop convincing
yourself that it's okay to do these these things. It's not
right. Some, you know, a small reminder for myself and for
anybody else inshallah. Anyone else anything, want to share
anything?
Anything, anything, anything? Yes. You know, when it comes to
listening,
when people listen to respond, listen to understand.
Saying that, like, come to my
grown up was like you have two ears, one mouth.
Started start listening to double, and you speak because you don't
even know, whatever you say is
as powerful as possible. It seems trivial, but it's powerful. Right?
And also, like, kind of going back to what your brother was saying.
This like idea of like, when a person speaks too much, their
words decrease in quality. It's just it just it's like, you know,
it's like you can draw the analogy to anything else in life. Like if
you find like an item in the store abundantly available, no one's
gonna be jumping after it. Like, oh, I can just get it next week.
Right? But like, go back to like, April 2020. Man, you see like one
roll of toilet paper on the in the in the aisle, you're like
Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa salatu. Salam, like jump at it, right?
Because it's rare. So like, if you speak less, the words that you do
say will stick with people more.
And this is really and we actually studied this in Hadith at the
seminary, that the Prophet Why do you think people clung on to his
words, there was a woman by the name of Uma, but very famous
narration who the prophesies that I'm just happen to have spent like
an afternoon with while he was going on migration with Abu Bakar.
Before the Lavon, an older lady, her husband was away. She was
literally at the farm. And the whole miraculous kind of, you
know, situation took place where he milked one of the animals that
she had that was very malnourished, and it was enough to
fill up buckets for him a bucket. So there are a guide, and also
left some for OMO and a boom rabbit.
And he spent, Sera says like maybe like a couple hours, a few hours
with her. And then when her husband came back, he asked, he's
like, Well, there was obviously a person here. Who was he? And she
basically spilled like the, to this day, the most vivid
description of the promises that we have. And one of the things
that she said was that whenever he spoke, it was as though pearls
were coming out of his mouth.
Dude, that was like, a few hours, a
few hours of being in a person's presence. You're like pearls came
out of his mouth. I'm like, man, like if I had my mom described
like my speech, you'd be like, yeah, like Jehan, I'm like, came
out of his mouth. Like, right, like, like, absolute atrocity,
right? Like, think about how beautiful must have looked. And he
didn't speak very often. He just spoke very little while he was
with her. But the few things that he said were so powerful, that
that's how she described his speech. Right? Can you imagine
that?
It is absolutely mind boggling. Right? So Hala
anyone else?
Anyone more? Sure? Anything? Anything? Any thoughts? Any
reflections that they have?
Everyone called? Yeah, no, man. Hello? Yeah, that's a good
question. Yes. How would you suggest people navigate?
Woke, you know, social media like, hey, you know? Yeah, attitudes
that people have towards like speech and what they say. Yeah,
I'm, honestly check you anything about this? What what are you what
are you? What do you think? No, no, that's not you, bro.
I defer to you.
Right you're not attending, sir. You are not attending. Um,
I, you know, one of the things that I was taught so this is not
my advices advice for people that have given me advice is ask
yourself every moment that you speak, why are you speaking? Is it
to satiate your own vanity? Or is it because you actually have
something of benefit that you can live by and you can share some
goodness with other people? I'll be honest with you, social media
is like one of the biggest like tests for the knifes. Like, why
are you posting this? Are you posting it? Because you're like,
Yo, I want like,
I want everyone to see, right? Everything that's going on?
Are you arguing with the person just because at this point, you
don't even care about like the benefit of this person? You're
just like, bro, I can't back down. You know, that's like something.
That's right. Why are you arguing? Because you're nuts will will tell
you like, no, no, you can't you can't take this URL. Like, if you
take this URL, Facebook will know about it forever. Right? Like, you
can't just back off of this argument. So ask yourself isn't
beneficial? Like, why am I doing this, and also to kind of combat
that, and I'll be honest with you, and this is very true. The more
you learn the in a really odd way, the more humble you get about
whatever you do know.
Like, you're more careful about what you do know, you know, like,
like before, like before, and you can ask, like the students at the
seminary, you know, Zeno's here and you know, Abdullah is here, as
you know, something Arabic.
When you come in, you're like, oh, man, you know, like, Yeah, I've
heard about this, right, you know, sort of Hadith and Quran, Sierra
right. I've heard about this stuff before, and you get there and
Rolla, you get humbled with like a slap. Like, I don't know,
anything. I know nothing. You know? So like, ask yourself like,
is your knowledge like something that's actually like, heavy? Or is
it something that you're like, it's crazy, you know, what my one
of my family members used to say? Like,
you take basically like, 80% of the knowledge that you have, and
you just like, read, like you read, just regurgitate it.
Like, but there's not, there's only 20% left in your brain.
That's
the people who are truly knowledgeable, they're not just
going to be spilling everything that they know, because they keep
majority of it to improve themselves.
They're not going to spill it to everybody else. Because knowledge
is Amana. If I know fajr prayer exists, it's upon me not to wake
up for pleasure. So what if I go out on a lecture people about the
importance of Fajr prayer and you know, the hadith of Fajr and
verses in the Quran by Fajr? Like, do you do I even abide by those
teachings? So knowing that, like, knowledge is an Amana, like, if
you know about Allah will ask you about it.
So walk the walk, you know, it's very easy to talk. Talking is
super easy, and anybody can do it. You know? So, just something to
think about, you know,
guy, man, you just got you. That's why I shake well, you know, 100%
agree with this is the why like, when you learn you got to learn
from like, people. You can't learn by yourself. It's a tragedy to
learn by yourself. Because yeah, knowledge is knowledge. But if you
don't learn from a person, that knowledge is completely untapped.
But yeah, you know, things you have no idea how to how to handle
them.
You know, there are times where like, I learned something and some
of the teachers that you know, I study with, they're like, No, shut
up. You're not like, like, you're not allowed to talk about this.
You haven't learned enough about it?
When like, my necessary normal, but I can do it. I sat here for
this whole semester, I can toggle. Like, no, no, you haven't let it
sink in. You haven't learned it properly yet. You know, that's
where like a person who knows more than you can kind of like check
you a little bit. That's the problem. today's day and age.
Honestly, everything's unchecked. There's no checks and balances.
Everyone just does where they want to. Anyone can make a Twitter
account
to whatever you want rule number 40 characters you got this? Right.
It's dangerous. This is crazy stuff.
Very good. Anyone else? Anything else? Everyone enjoys food. And
Allah has a deep I hope he's like something that like I hope it's
something that you know, you can take home
Which kind of think about a little bit i don't i don't want like the,
the conversation so if we just to end here, like I want everyone to
kind of go home to think about it, see how you can apply it in your
life a little bit. Because like everything that we speak about
here is not just supposed to be in these walls, it's supposed to go
out there and just kind of be a part of like your betterment.
Right? So the next time there is an opportunity for like a social
gathering, and someone's just saying stuff and just saying seven
things that you're like, Man, the process oh man, he like warned me
kind of about this stuff. You know, I can't just go around
frivolously saying stuff I've got to kind of watch what I say
because every single thing that I say is now you know something I'm
accountable for. Alright, so that's what Islam is supposed to
do to you.
All right, there's almost kind of everybody inshallah we'll be
pouring hot chocolate for you guys over here we have a fresh hot
chocolate we bought the steam the steam one out here for you from
the law. So if you guys want hot chocolate let us know and we have
halaal marshmallows you know we don't do them another Harami stuff
around here
check joking around about this is like chicken you don't ask me for
that marshmallows are from surprise.
So hello marshmallows and hot chocolate in sha Allah as you guys
head out and then also mashallah sister Xena brought some donuts
for us Hamza Lulu, so coffee and donuts were basically police
officers tonight Shala and coffee hot chocolate donuts but
hamdulillah it's it's a good mix and a good kind of like warm treat
for you guys on this cold night. But just like look, I don't thank
you guys for coming shot luck, and we'll see you all next week. So
don't want