Muslim Unity Center
Rania Awaad – Prophet Muhammad’s PBUH approach to mental health
AI: Summary ©
The interviewer discusses the origins of Prophet sallama's approach to mental health, including his use of images and a message of God, and the loss of people, including their relatives and family members. They stress the importance of balancing emotions and helping everyone, while acknowledging one's ego in a family. The community has become more normalized with people speaking out, and resources for mental health and crisis therapy are available. The importance of finding resources for mental health is emphasized, and the speaker offers resources for those who attend the gathering.
AI: Summary ©
Sit down with a coma rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu
I pray you're all well. Thank you so much, email Masha Allah for the wonderful introduction and also the reminder of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam his character, and who he was Subhanallah to so many in his time, And subhanAllah how many of us are so many generations after continuing to remember the blessing of character, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and hoping to emulate his example and today Inshallah, on our discussion on mental health, that is exactly what we hope to continue to do. Smilla Rahmanir Rahim was Allah Allahu Allah say that Muhammad wa ala alihi wa Suffield use an image of mine. Also, my thanks to the Unity Center for this invitation. It's always wonderful to be back
here amongst family and friends, community that I had a blessing to spend some time with my youth growing up and hunted Allah and a recognition to both of my parents who are both here. Mashallah, may Allah bless you both. Aloma? I mean,
I mean, you haven't been out I mean,
in our discussion today, the topic I was asked to address by this wonderful group and congregation is the discussion on the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam himself and his approach to mental health. And you might think, Subhan, Allah, what is this connection? Is there something from the Prophet salallahu Salam himself that talks about mental health? Is this term even found at the time of the Prophet sallallahu Juanda he was sent him? What is this? How do you translate this word into Arabic? Exactly? And do they have something like mental health or psychology or psychiatry in that time?
And subhanAllah this is a long discussion. And I'll give you the nutshell kind of, you know, in a nutshell, kind of explanation, to say that the Prophet himself sallallahu alayhi wasallam, inspired an entire generation of people, and generations after them, including ourselves this many centuries later, to really take care of all aspects of health.
This concept of health or health, is something that actually led Islam right directly from within Islam says that there should be no distinguishing or discrimination between any one of the sorts of or the facets of health, not physical health, not mental health, not emotional health, not spiritual health, all of which are equally important.
And so for anybody who's thinking still, not a no, no, Dr. Ananya, mental health seems to be kind of like this new age thing. Are you sure? It seems kind of a? I don't know. Maybe, kind of more of a modern construct. Was it really something part of Islam? Is it really something part of the Prophet himself? SallAllahu wasallam in his sunnah his blessing Sana? Well, let's explore this together in sha Allah to Allah. So this is where I'd like to begin. You know, some of you know that I love to speak about history, but I'm not going to worry about history today, sha Allah, although I find it very exciting, from didn't know, but what I will tell you about is directly about him. So Allahu
Allah, He will send him
one of the most important things that we understand about the reason Allah subhanaw taala sent prophets.
Listen closely to this, okay? Think about this, if Allah subhanaw taala has a message to humanity.
It is very easy for a lot of Azerbaijan, to send down that message directly to us. It could have been in the form of a book, it could have been in the form of tablets, it could have been in the form of any sort of Scripture that comes. But he brought his message with a messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.
And he could have said, maybe that's sufficient. We will learn the Quran literally the Scripture, the living example of the Quran through the prophet himself. So Melania will send them a walking put on, as we say,
but in addition to that, he also sends
a community Sahaba and so how Viet men and women around the Prophet sallallahu wasallam, to live life, everyday life, so that whatever happens with them, good and bad, whatever good happens and whatever mistakes happen. He sallallahu alayhi wa salam can explain to us what is appropriate according to the Quran, and what isn't, you see, because he himself as the most perfect of all human beings, the most blessed of all human beings, the best of them have at Hunkeler. He's not going to make the kind of mistakes, right that ordinary individuals will but the Companions men and women may and so we'll learn right through his right through his sunnah through his sayings through his
actions, what is accurate, what isn't? You take all of this together, the Quran and the Sunnah, and the examples of the righteous that were all there at the time of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam that then inspire the next
generations, and you start to understand the story of mental health.
Let me tell you how.
Let's start with the Prophet himself. Some Allahu alayhi wa sallam. Many times when people think about mental health, they think about difficulties.
They think about words like depression or anxiety. They think about trauma. They think about diagnoses.
They think about, maybe even medications, or maybe they think about a label that someone puts on them, or their children, let's say.
How did the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam himself deal with his difficulties?
That's the question. Because he is the best of all of creation.
And human,
human, meaning, there were times that things were rough. There were times that he cried, and grieved. There were times that he was frustrated, and things were difficult. There were times where things did not go his way SallAllahu ala he was in and through his example, and later, I'll get to the next layer out example of the companions, we learn quite a bit about how you deal with trials and tribulations and your mental health, your mental well being
the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam had a year,
that was very difficult for him. So much so and so prolonged, that the scholars of Sita, those who kind of captured everything related to his life,
called it What does anyone remember?
Um, and who isn't? Literally on a year of sorrow, a year of grief, a year of prolonged sadness? Why is this important?
When I tell people sometimes that are going through something difficult, and I say, this is rather human, but it doesn't just sort of mean that you twiddle your thumbs and sit around and say,
you know, if Allah sent it to me, then it shall pass. Of course it will. Because Allah has also said that he sent you difficulty, he will send you ease in America or three, your straw, and it's repeated a second time in America, oh, sorry, your straw. And whenever Allah subhanaw taala, repeat something twice in the put on, it means
pay attention.
This is important, and therefore I'm repeating it. And when we talk about difficulty, people think well, how is ease with difficulty because after difficulty comes ease. It's literally what Mara, it's with, literally tucked tucked into the difficulty is your ease. But sometimes you can't see it right away. And sometimes that ease isn't the thing itself, but rather circumstances around it. People, individuals, resources, just the ability to deal with something heavy, emotionally, all of these are forms of your straw.
Right? And so look at the profits on the law and even send them in this year of prolonged sadness and difficulty. Let's count together what happens.
Who knows the Seto well, how does it start? What's the first thing there's a series of losses that happen? What's the first loss?
I'm hearing different things.
So I'm hearing his wife, his wife say that so you the Khadija on the Allahu on her. Right? This is his wife of so many years, the mother of all of his children up until this point. And right his blessing companion.
His anchor, beautiful description, a lot a beautiful description. Yeah. In Home internally, this is his anchor, we would call her his internal supports.
Anyone you're terrified and you're running off the mountain and you're literally trembling as described in the Quran, and she is there to hold you to support you and to remind you that Allah does not want bad for you.
After all these years of support, who's given you all of this what emotional sustenance and support and is literally given all of her wealth for the dollar, right for Islam, and has given all of her support to you?
She passes away.
It's heavy.
It's heavy.
And soon after, what happens?
The next loss? Yes, Michel. We have some Sita experts here. The loss of his uncle. What's his name?
Obatala. Why is he important?
Why is he important?
What is the role that Ebola plays for the Prophet sallallahu wasallam and for Islam, and you say for Islam, we don't know him to be Muslim. There's some trade off. But let's just say that there's we don't know him publicly visibly to be able slim. So why is he so important? Yes.
It is exactly while his uncle was alive, the people of Perish the enemies could not touch the Prophet salallahu Salam, he was protected. So you have an internal protection and anchor from Sierra Khadija, for some reason, so you're not alone. And you have an external protection from his uncle, both of whom passed away and in a very short span of time, told me there's another loss that happens after that.
Yes, in the backdrop, there is a sanction, there is an economic boycott against the Muslims, meaning no trade no in no out. So much so that they're literally starving. In this period of time, the Sahaba would talk about how they were eating leaves. One of them said, I took in the darkness, I picked up something mushy, I didn't know what it was, it was dark arts. And I picked it up and I put it on my mouth and it was chew and I just chewed it
Yanni to this level of starvation.
And then there's another loss.
What else happens in this year?
All within weeks of each other
before that, there's something
and then
we're missing something.
F Very good. All I know what I like very good. What happens after the death of the uncle. And in the backdrop of this economic boycott, the Prophet sallallahu wasallam says, Well, I have distant femoral family that's in thought if I no longer have protection of push, and they're not going to be listening to me. They're there other the people that are, you know, the important people of Croatia no longer listening to me. So why don't I try another set of a distant family members and another tribe altogether? Maybe they'll listen. So he literally walks Has anyone been to potluck by the way? Anyway? Visited life?
Yeah. Can you describe what's it like?
It's it's 50 Some miles. Right? And what does it look like?
It's someone's a beautiful, what about five?
It's very different than the other cities. It's different than Mecca. It's different than Medina.
It's very luscious. Jonnie, it's yes. You're still in the Arabian Peninsula, but it's very green. It's very lush, it has orchards and orchards. It's so interesting, a different place. Subhan Allah. And here you have the Prophet sallallahu wasallam head over there. And he starts his Dawa, he starts to call people to Assam. He's got very specific, the heads of the tribe that he wants to reach one by one. And he goes to them, one by one. You know what they say to him? One person says to him, what your Allah couldn't find someone better than you to send us.
Someone else says, if you really are the Prophet, that I'll be cursed, right?
The next person says, Don't even try to talk to me. Basically, each one of them kicks him out. Each one of them in turn kicks him out. And so he decides, despite all of this pain, right of people, being very human humiliating him, he decides to stay in it for a little bit longer. Why? He says, Well, let me give the Dawa to the common people. Right, their leaders don't want to listen, maybe the commoners will listen.
And then they started to actually be interested in what is this message of Islam?
Do you know what happens next? The leaders get wind of the fact that the people are getting interested in Islam. So what do they do to him?
They literally drive him out of thought F and tell me what they do because it's very humiliating what they do you know this part of the story. What are they do?
They gather the who? The children and they literally pick up stones and pelt him with this so much so that literally he starts to bleed us a little longer want to send them. It said that his heels were so * from this ends
didn't have them so many stones hitting him that his foot is sticking into his sandal because of the blood.
Some Allah want to send him and you know, when you're when you're targeted like this, you're so humiliated like this. He said, I lost track of where I was. Can you imagine you're being driven out and being pelted and pelted with stones and you're bleeding? And you're kind of a little bit confused where you are beside I did not even know where I was.
Until we got to a specific orchard
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam
Do you know whose orchard it was?
Guess that this was with him. It was the the purse, the servant, their servant SubhanAllah. And he sits in this orchard on a rock. And he it makes a very special dua to Allah subhanaw taala powerful dua, I encourage us all to learn it and even memorize it. Because in this drop, He literally says to Allah, if I've done something wrong, and this is some sort of punishment for me, then forgive me, I accept it. But if you are happy with me, you're pleased with me. And this is basically like a test or tribulation that I'm going through that I accept. I accept. And he sees at that point, what? Who? Who does he see?
The angel? The angel?
What angel?
Satan Jeffrey, and what is Satan revealing coming with a message? What does he tell him?
See, you said Hills earlier and there were mountains there. And he says to him, If you want I will take these mountains and
basically destroy this group of people that have humiliated you so much.
And what is the profit say so the law Juanjo Santa.
You said Rama, mercy. He says maybe it could be that from their progeny from their next generations. There'll be believers. So keep them the call merciful. He is salAllahu alayhi wa sallam despite the agony, despite the agony. And there's a beautiful next part of the story. And I didn't mean to go all the way into the store. I thought if I love the story, but there's the next part of the story, which is I'll just share very quickly. Subhanallah where is the where is the use that I tucked into the hillside here?
He's sitting in an orchard. And the orchard belongs to people who are technically enemies, right? But he's sitting there. And the people see him and he's bleeding and very difficult. It's a very difficult journey. It's like they had some shuffling off for him, right? They had some, you know, empathy for him. And so they said they sent their servant to him. And they said, Give him some grapes. From the orchard. Remember, I've told you orchards. Right. So when he, when he see when he when he's offered these grapes, he says Bismillah.
And the servant who listens to this, he says, Who taught you to say this?
And he says, I'm a prophet of God. I'm taught this the way Allah has taught the prophets. And so he says, the servant says, I haven't heard anyone in these lands say these words.
And he says, Well, where are you from? Do you guys know where he was from?
From your city.
Masha, Allah,
Masha, Allah, Oh, beautiful.
Founded in LA. And he said, I too, am a descendant of which Prophet said that Eunice. And I'm a prophet, just like the Prophet Yunus. And we are both given a message from the same God. Do you know that that servant right there, took his shahada
and became a Muslim people don't know some of the little finer details, but that was he hoped for thought if to become Muslim, but he had this one person and he said with this one person, it was the weight of that entire current city that leader that him that I had a chance to visit thought if sounds like you did to Masha Allah, they are the most generous, beautiful people you will meet Subhan Allah, and they are core like, like very proud believers and Muslims today. And generous, generous. They still have the orchards and they're very generous. Subhanallah and you think about how that whole city been annihilated? There wouldn't have been those believers today. But let's go
back to our story. Here's the Prophet sallallahu ala he was send them he's had what? Multiple losses one after another after another in his life.
And you're right. You mentioned something that happens right after this and this theta, what does that illustrate with Mr. Dodge? This is the night journey. Right? And to the ascension happens right after this incident. Allah is giving him relief after these difficult moments and things that has healed he's been through Subhan Allah as he goes through these
difficulties.
He's a Mullah Juana he was and then we learned from him. And from all of the stories, that he grieved
that he cried
that he felt a sense of even being in melt with the confusion and an almost like everyone is against you. And he physically bled and hurt. Why do I share this? Because when you think about the discussion on mental health, and you think about person's well being and mental wellness, we turn first to the prophets of Allah, why do send them? What is it that we don't see?
We don't see somebody turning after some difficulty turning against Allah subhanaw taala. We don't see somebody saying why me.
We don't see somebody saying, I can do this completely on my own.
That last point is very important. Because we talked about how the Prophet saw us and him had his internal anchor, His external anchor, and he had his community.
And he went and tried to seek out support from the leaders who wouldn't listen to him. But he was trying because he knew that you don't do this alone.
See, today, we have a little bit of a trouble with this. A lot of us believe that we can do things completely on our own.
We think that we need to be self sufficient. We need to be able to wipe away our own tears. And in fact, we maybe shouldn't even have tears in the first place. And that's just simply not the message of our Prophet, or the prophets of the Quran.
Do you know my best example of this? You must know my best example of this. Who am I referring to? In the Quran?
Saying they are poop. What about say they are killed in the Quran?
Allah subhanho wa Taala described very eloquently and specifically,
the crying and the tears of you say a day Jakob, what did he say? What's the verse?
He did say that
to a mom? And how does he say his crying specifically?
what your thoughts are, you know, who made his name, for who are calling him. It's amazing.
The fact that the description of the crying of Satan, they are called the Father of us have on the loss of his son, his loss of his son, right? This is the part of the story early on in the suta, where the whole story reads like a story SubhanAllah. And early on, we see that the loss of faith in the use of the brothers are jealous of him. They put him in they can't get themselves to kill him, although they think about murder Subhan Allah, what jealousy can do to you. And instead they put him in the the well, they come back and complain to it, or they report to their father as though he was dead. So the output has a sense, a feeling that something's not right. But nevertheless, even as a
prophet of God, who's receiving revelation from God, he's what
he cries.
I want to ask you something.
Will we ever say that say they are poop is any less of a prophet because he cried? No. What do we say that he's any less of a man? Because he cried.
When we say that he's any less of a believer because he cried.
Pasha, you can't, there's no way. And not only does he cry, I don't mean just some tears. I'm talking about the kind of tears and crying that described in the Quran as his eyes and went white with grief. And the scholars debate was this blindness, or was this more like a haziness? The way cataracts might do to you? Whatever it is, the point is, the word in Arabic is will be held, but Aina his eyes went white, with grief.
Yanni so much crying and for prolonged period of time, do you know from the time saying that Yusuf was lost until he was found?
Or reunited with his father? How many years was that? Does anyone know?
How many years?
It's a few decades, some say between 20 to 30 years, before he's reunited with his son, that many years of crying.
It'll do it too.
What do I want to say? We would never say here's a prophet of God, after the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam our understanding of who are the best humans are the prophets, the most closest to Allah subhanaw taala. And here is a prophet of God, who is crying so much, why do I really emphasize this? Because forgive me, but I'm going to put something there that you may not be happy with me, but especially our boys on our men. What do we say to them?
Be a man.
Don't be a girl.
Men don't cry, man up.
Would you say that's a prophet?
I'm not trying to say a lot, everybody start crying.
But what I am trying to say is tears have a purpose. And tears have a place. And tears are something that is not considered to be the opposite of a believer. This point is very important. Because for so many people, when we talk about mental health, the immediate thing is, well, if they just had a better Iman, they wouldn't have mental health problems. Would you say that about Prophet Jacobi the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam,
you have a whole entire arm and husen a whole year of sadness, of grief of sorrow. When we say this to them, that their Iman wasn't strong enough. No. So what do we mean then? It means that there's possible that a person can have very strong belief in Allah and be an immense pillar of belief. But
mic sometimes don't like me, that's okay.
They are going to start crying two, three.
And here's my proof for you. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says about the believers, right? He says about believers that if Allah subhanaw taala wanted, good for you, he's going to test you. Because the best of all people are the prophets and they are the most tested. And after them are the people who are the closest to Allah subhanaw taala. And they are the most tested after the prophets, and so on and so forth.
And people have a really hard time with this, but it is part of our tradition, it's part of our Islamic concept. For example, the Prophet sallallahu wasallam says maturity level will be higher and you will sleep in Minho. What does that translate to whoever Allah intends good for he sends them affliction
that benefits them.
Sometimes these difficulties are a purification.
Sometimes these difficulties are a reminder.
Sometimes it's a prick that kind of says, Okay, what is this? Or maybe it's a humiliating and humbling experience to say, I need to get help. I shouldn't and can't do this completely on my own.
And I think that's really important because so many times I talked to individuals who they themselves have gotten to a point where they realize I need help. And they'll say to members of their family and their community, their friends, and they'll say, I think I need some help. But often they're met with resistance. No, you don't.
Just pray more. No, you don't. Don't be so lazy. No, like get up, get up. No, you don't. If you just did X, Y or Z, you'd be fine. But this isn't the message of our deen. And it's not the message of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. In fact, you want to know what is the message? I'll tell you.
There were times in the prophets life himself SallAllahu Ana who was send them that he wanted so much to spread Islam to give this message of Dawa, that he wanted everyone to be part of the fold of Islam. But there were some who were resistant and they just weren't going to listen Subhan Allah and Allah subhanaw taala talked to him or addressed him directly in the Quran.
And he says to him as an idea that you all know and probably recite weekly, but let's think of the context in which is revealed. Fela Anglica bath your knapsack Allah at him Ilam you mean will be herbal Hadith the SFL
Are you familiar with this verse? You recite it? You know it? What is it translated to? It says, Now perhaps all Prophet, you will grieve yourself to death. Okay, listen to me, and grieve yourself to death, over their denial. If they continue to disbelieve in this message.
Allah is saying to him,
there is a limit of what you can do, and of convincing other people about this message. Even if they don't listen, you can to basically put yourself in a situation where you will grieve so heavily and so deeply that will start to affect you, psychologically and physically.
So Allah puts a limit in place of how far you can go before you have to address this. Do you see what I'm saying?
And Allah subhanaw taala told him
fell out to the hip enough set out
to the hip net. So Galle him Hassan not Do not grieve yourself to death over him Oh prophet. You
Annie, remember that even the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam as a human? Yes, the best of all humans was prone,
was prone to going into a state of grieving so extensively that it could be problematic. So Allah is telling him don't go that far. Right?
So I have five messages for you or five main aspects of when people want to know what is the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu said in his approach himself to mental health, let's do all five. Number one, the first and foremost, that suffering can be that blessing from Allah subhanaw taala. And for somebody who does not believe in Allah and doesn't understand the concept of a God centered kind of concepts, worldview, where you realize that you are not the one in charge, there is a laws, divine wisdom,
really orchestrating everything, it's hard to understand this concept. Why would you have somebody who's going to have a suffering be a blessing, but here's my proof for you.
There's a hadith where the prophet muhammad sallallahu wasallam says, I do have the Umbrian money in Umrah who could do
that the book The wonderous, it's wonderous, the believer, all that happens to the believer is later is good. All that happens is good.
And he emphasizes that this is not for anybody except for the believer, that if Allah gives them good,
but hunted Allah, it's good for them. But if he gives them difficulty, then what? Also in Hungary Allah, exactly. But if it that, if the good, the gratitude, the prosperity comes to them, then they have sugar. They're in gratitude to Allah subhanaw taala. And if the difficulty comes to them, the adversity befalls them, they endure patiently. And this is also good for them. Only a believer can understand this. And only a believer can have the kind of patience to kind of push them through or pull them through this difficulty when it comes to them.
Number two,
to embrace this knowledge of your emotions, in balance, like the message I was saying earlier about the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, even Allah subhanaw taala put limits to the Dawa, that he was doing that it can't be a point where it drives him into the ground, essentially, right? Even the Dawa of Islam. And so here, this idea of balance, the Prophet sallallahu wasallam taught us the importance of acknowledging our own emotions.
If people think this is so interesting, but this is really the Prophet told us about our emotions, yes.
Not only did he SallAllahu Sallam acknowledge his own emotions, but he acknowledged the emotions of the people of his community.
And there are many examples of this. But let me tell you the story, which is a difficult story, but an important story. And it comes later in the prophets life.
And now he has the youngest of his children, a son
by the name of Ibrahim.
And Ibrahim was not to live. He was not going to live very long.
And as he's literally taking his very last breaths, he's sitting on the lap of his father, the prophets, Allah Allahu Allah He was.
And this little child is taking the very last breaths, and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam begins to cry.
Visible tears coming down his cheeks. So much so that the Companions see that's curious.
And so they asked him, because they're curious, they want to know everything. The prophet does everything he says everything he does everything they have to understand. Is this okay? Is this not okay? What do we do? What is this mean?
So they asked him about the tears.
And this is what he says.
In the line
while apologizing, while an Apollo in law, my god Rapana.
Were in Nairobi, firaga Ibrahim Lama has,
indeed the eyes shed tears and the heart feel sorrow.
But we do not say that except which is pleasing to Allah Subhana Allah to Allah.
Surely your departure, oh, Ibrahim leaves us all deeply saddened.
And he explains to the Companions
tears are normal. They're normative. There is what this is what Allah has given us to grieve with. It's different crying is different than wailing and screaming and carrying on
the tears and being overcome by emotion. And the feeling of sorrow and grief in your heart is human.
And if you don't have this and you're a robot
and he shows through his own blessitt example some Alonzo Salem, the not only is it okay to cry,
but a believer cries, but what they don't do is push against, or say something that Allah would not be okay with. Does that make sense? It's so important when he says, and we do not say except that pleases Allah means I don't complain about what Allah has given me.
I don't push, I don't have access at all. I don't push against the feet that God has given me. He's taken my young son away. Some might say, Why me? How come? Why not him? Why not her?
I understand that this has come to me until I accept it. But it does not negate that I can be tearful and sad. Does that make sense? This is important. This balance. This is what I mean by balance of emotion. Recognizing emotion. See, sometimes as modern humans, what we do is we start to label emotions. We say sadness and tears, bad.
happiness and joy, good.
We don't realize that the entire spectrum of emotions is something Allah created. He created sadness, just like he created happiness, and therefore, all of which are hid the creation of Allah subhanaw taala. So you can't label some of them good, and some of them bad. Does that make sense? And this balance is part of his prophetic example, towards mental health. Number three,
to regulate our emotions.
The prophetic example on mental health here is a regulation of emotions. Think about a hadith that you know, I know you know this one about anger.
What does the Prophet say? Anger is an emotional law has created
and put in the right direction it could actually lead to good, put in the wrong and to an extreme situation, it can definitely lead to bad. What is the Hadith that you know about anger?
lappato Tell me more. What else do you know about anger?
What happens if you're angry? What is the Prophetic sunnah to do?
Oh, good.
Excellent, excellent. You're saying all different parts of the Hadith. Excellent. But if a person is standing, they sit. And if they're very, and if they feel that heat, right? What is this? This is another narration of what that anger is from shaitan shaitan is made from fire. So how do you put this out? Water so go make will do. Right? There is a behavior this is in psychology, we would call this a behavioral modification to an emotion that you're feeling.
Literally, you're regulating the emotions.
By putting again limits around them, you're not cancelling them out and saying nope, canceled. You're actually modulating them, modifying them, helping them to be the best version of you, Inshallah, tada.
Number four, to take time to take care of yourself. And you'll say really, self care as part of the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam? Absolutely. Sometimes people hear this word, self care. And they think I'm saying selfish.
I'm not telling us to be selfish. But when I'm saying self care, it's the same kind of care that we give to anything that we're doing. When we say self care, I don't just mean spa days, ladies.
When I mean self care, I mean, everything, all aspects of care. So if it's physical, then it's taking care of our physical bodies, whatever form of exercise that allows you to do now, when I say emotional self care, it's regulating and working on our emotions. And if there's something that is just like physical, by the way, some people are very motivated. They say I can go run a mile, no problem. Other people, they literally need like a running group to do anything.
Some people are like, I can have the running of the machine, the treadmill in my own house, and I'll have the self discipline to get up on it and to do something with it. Others, they'll have every machine created.
Yep, what's missing? Is them getting on to the machine saw. Michelle. So then what do they need? They need encouragement. They need a group. Sometimes they need a trainer.
Right? I have this excellent trainers Pamela, and Muslim lady. She was really excellent, Mashallah. And I have noticed the difference of having a trainer versus not having a trainer. You know, it's something about there's accountability. I knew that I was accountable. I was gonna shut up and she was going to ask, right, and I had to be there. And there were certain times in certain days that I had to be on time. So
On the wall, and that level of accountability was very useful if we do that for physical health, what about for emotional health?
Okay, you're not ready to hear about emotional health. What about spiritual health? Now come back to emotional health. What do you do for your spiritual health?
You're here, here on a Friday night. You could be at the movie theaters. You can be at the mall. I don't know, The Who. The gym
to an extent the gym might be okay. But it's a Friday night, you could really be literally anywhere Subhanallah What are you doing for your spiritual health and well being.
You're here with the man mashallah, you're here in a circle of knowledge Holika. You're here in a bonds of sisterhood and brotherhood that kind of uplift you and keep you going spiritually. And then from that on the many programs that you're attending,
this is helping you spiritual health. If you completely cut out all aspects of a Muslim community and a place in which you're learning Islam, you'll find this is deficient. It's just like the treadmill that can't get the person on it. Same thing with spiritual health. Now we're ready to get to emotional health.
What happens with emotional mental health, if we find ourselves unable to do this completely on our own,
some people can, they may have the resources or the family, or the friends or the support. And maybe what they're dealing with is what we would call mild, mild on this, the grand scheme of things mild, but maybe for some people, their tribulation in life comes in that
mental health or emotional health aspect. And maybe it's a moderate or even a severe.
Even then people say you can do this on your own. Why we're not Superwoman and Superman.
We're not. That's not how God created us. He didn't create us to fly. He didn't create us with special superpower. He really didn't. He created us humans. And he gave us examples of people close to him, who also told us to get help. You want my proof?
That companions went to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and they said to Him, if we get sick, should we go get treatment?
What are they implying in this question?
They're asking the prophet of God. It's as though even though it's not said, It's as though it's implied. Yada, yada love isn't prayer enough? Are they good enough?
They didn't say this. But it's essentially implied Should we go get treatment? They're asking the prophet who if you go to the average Muslim today, and you told them I'm a depressed
he would say, you SOB would be
a believer does not get depressed. Go pray. This is the typical answer.
What was the prophets answer? So the long while he was selling
to dow
Dow Whoo, yeah. How about Allah?
Seek out treatments Oh servants of God.
In Allahu Alem, yada, yada and Illa Well, da Mara, who she thought I want some narrations, Dilip.
I'll translate. The Companions asked the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, if we get sick, should we go get treatment. And he's on the law to sit him answered and said, Seek out treatments, oh servants of God. For God does not send down illnesses. He does not create illnesses, unless he creates its cure. Or in some variations, its treatment. And this is what modern medicine would tell you today. There are some illnesses that have cures. And some illnesses that have only treatments that are chronic, they won't go away, but you can treat them.
And this is powerful, you know, when the pandemic happened, and nobody understood what was happening with COVID-19, especially in those first few months. Think about March 2020. Right for the first few months. Can you put yourself back there? It's not that long ago. Yeah. Put yourself back there. I don't know. None of us want to be witches. We're just a few that just emotionally because it's so recent history. Right? Can't believe we're saying history. But anyway, it's so recent, that you can put yourself back into the feeling of English of just being angst of like not knowing what is this thing and people are dying and they're telling us to isolate and to drop everything we're doing and
to stay at home. And
do you remember that feeling? This tiny, little microscopic, microscopic little virus that you can't see, that brings the entire world to a standstill?
And I was so wonderful to hear believers say that if Allah created an illness, he's also created its cure or treatment, and Subhanallah would only be within a matter of months given to modern medicine. Subhan Allah
And the work of people, some of whom are Muslim, by the way, right? who figured out the vaccine for COVID? Who put, right because the cure doesn't just fall from the sky, you have to actually take active work to make it happen. Science and rec room and verbinden, lab work and kind of research and so on. Anyway, the point is the belief of knowing that if Allah sent an illness, even a brand new one we've never seen before, he's also going to send its cure treatment. There is no discrimination in Islam between physical illness and mental illness. And if you want my proof to this, the proof are the institutions that the Muslims created.
We actually named our nonprofit organization that is done after these institutions. For those of you know, funciona, do you know the word be mod
illness, Stan location, be modest? Stan is the hospitals of the Muslims.
The Arabic of this is daughter, she thought.
Interestingly, in the Arab lands, they have the big amount of stones, that's what they call them. And then the non Arab lands, they call them with AutoShape.
They're the same kind of institution, they're a hospital, and the hospital was run by physicians.
And you know, it was so beautiful by it.
We're writing a book at this moment, make dua inshallah we're almost done with it in sha Allah Tada.
But we can't find proof of other civilizations parallel or before the Muslims, that put psychiatric wards in their hospitals before the Muslims.
Then you tell me, that there's something in Islam that discriminates between mental health and physical health.
There isn't
any they had the wherewithal to say, if Allah says there's an illness, there must be a treatment that I'm going to whatever illness I see in front of me in society, I'm going to work hard to make sure we provide health and care for that person.
So their hospitals are literally like this, a section for surgery, a section for obstetrics as such extend for internal medicine, a section for Ear, Nose and Throat, a section for ophthalmology, a section for psychiatry.
There are papers written by non Muslims, I'd say that that blueprint of the Muslim hospitals is the blueprint of the modern hospital system. They took it from the Muslims.
Because you know what the alternatives were that were available at the time. Send them to the nuns or priests to pray on them,
or in Europe at the same exact time. Burn them as witches at the stake. Because this is all supernatural possession, that's happening to them.
Do you see what I'm saying? This is not what the Muslims understood, and where are they getting it from? So though, yeah, about the law, seek out treatments of servants of God. And lastly, number five, to seek help.
This is part of the Prophet sunnah. sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, it's himself.
You already heard the Hadith. But I'll tell you something very beautiful about the Sita.
Now, so it's not you shall get to finally say talk about her.
That says that you shall do love more on her years and years after the Prophet sallallahu wasallam passed away. She lived him for many, many years.
And for years afterwards, people would come to her specifically for many things.
One of which is medicine.
And people will be so amazed by this, they would say,
oh, shall we know that you are really good with your film, your Islamic laws and legislation because you lived with a Prophet sallallahu wasallam you're an immense narrator of the Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So that makes sense. We know you're really good with lineages, which was very important at the time for the Arabs until today. So one of our mock classes, actually to the preservation of the lineage. And they would say, we know that that's the case, because your father is a Wilbekin. And he was very good at this knowledge. So you pass it down to his daughter. But how is it that you're so good at medicine?
And she would say, because when I would get sick, when I went, when the prophets Allah sent him would get sick.
All of the tribes of Arabia, we try to send him different types of medicine, right? They all want to make sure that he's okay. So everyone is given, can you imagine try this, try this, try this treatment, try this or try this thing. Right. So she was a witness to all of this. She said, I learned all of the different kinds of treatments that were available at her time.
So she learned medicine.
And she learned from the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam himself, to give people treatment when they were ill not just simply to make dua for them or pray for them. You do that plus, you take the medicine,
and that's really important. And one such example that I'll give you is a special kind of soup, or kind of a meal you call it maybe a comfort food
called Sabina the people not Albina some people still make it till today.
Do you know what Silvina is? It's barley. Yes, exactly. It's a it's a it's, um, I take barley flour and milk and honey, and they would make it and they would give it to anybody who is feeling down having some anxiety or some down, you know, sadness. And when the people asked her about this, why do you give to a subpoena to these people because this was something she was doing. So it's an RV show. She said I heard the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam say Filipina helps the ailing heart cope and find rest. And it also relieves some sorrow and grief support.
Now, to me that to Lena itself is an interesting thing. But what's more interesting, is the fact that she actually learned from the prophet to treat depression and anxiety and sorrow and difficulty with a physical substance, not just merely DUA and prayer. Does that make sense?
Does that make sense? It's really important to understand that they took things to help them as well. And in the generations after them, because they're not the look that we're writing. We're looking at how to the in that hospital that I'm telling you about the medicines? What did they treat? They had the psychiatric wards, how did they treat those who are mentally ill? They had actual treatments for them, including treatments that were medication based, including treatments that were talk therapy. Yep, you just heard me right.
Talk therapy. I'm not saying the Muslims created it, we stopped to do more research to see if they were the first ever, but they were definitely some of the very first to work and to really help understand the benefit of something like talk therapy. That is not just talking, talking, talking, but it's actually learning techniques and tools to help you in healing. And the Muslims did this. And thirdly, spiritual help.
When you combine the three together medications, plus the therapy, plus the spiritual upliftment, you get a recipe for care, and concern
Hamdulillah, I can go into many, many more
examples of from our tradition Subhanallah, in which the the types of treatments that were used and the types of certain scholars and certain leaders of our historical paths that actually were really at the forefront of all of this discussion on mental illness, and I'm happy to share some of those things, I do want to give some time for the q&a did hamdulillah I'll conclude with this, we have our five kind of main examples of how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam dealt with mental health. And in addition, we'll say this, in this my closing kind of remark here is a call to action to really for our community.
And what is our call to action, that we have a tradition that literally teaches us that in addition to making dua, and making sure that we don't lose that connection with Allah subhanaw taala. And continuing with strong Iman, despite whatever difficulties and tribulations come our way, it is also a tradition that says, get help when you need it. Please don't stand in the way of those who do need that help. And here I very with a lot of humility,
say to our community,
please, parents don't stand in the way of the children that need the help.
Please, husbands don't stand in the way of the wives that need the help. Please, wives don't stand in the way of the husbands that need help. Please, young people don't stand away the elders that need the help Subhanallah at every level. And I meet so many people that come and talk to me afterwards. And they approach and they say I know I need help, or I know someone so needs help. But I can't seem to move the needle.
And I asked why. And they say shame.
Or if they're young, they'll say my parent is worried that I'm not going to get married?
Or they'll say they don't want it on their insurance record. Or they'll say
is it going to go on some other academic or job record?
Or they'll say, I'm not sure that I actually need this help in the first place. My concern with all of these things is all of them have a solution. None of them are you're not making any of them up all of them are real important things to consider. But ultimately, my concern is a decade later, two decades later, after you see the young people become older people. You see what happens is the cycle perpetuates. It just continues to perpetuate
I know people from my generation that grew up when I was growing up here, right and now they're my age and they have children mashallah our children are teenagers now. Subhanallah and as we see the cycles continue to perpetuate it's it's it's sad. And you think Subhanallah Had there been intervention earlier on?
What could have happened? And we don't go back and say well, no, because now we have to have admission. Right? The word if opens the door Shavon. So we're not going to say, you know, what if we got that help earlier, but we will say is today, from today, moving forward, let's make sure that that help can happen, that the healing can happen, that we can break cycles of difficulty. And cycles that will put in will protect that unnecessarily don't need to perpetuate themselves. And I say this to people, and they're not always happy when I say it, but I say, I don't want
your child or your family member 10 years from now to sit in my office and complain about you.
Not because you did something, but maybe it's the lack of doing something, the lack of getting help when they needed the home,
the lack of being there when they needed it. And more importantly than that, is to stand in front of Allah subhanaw taala. And to be asked him, he said, I put you in a community and in a place in a situation where you had resources, and you didn't take up the resources to get the help when needed.
Are you upset with me that I said this?
Some might be so forgiven Subhan Allah, but it's it's really a year it's because of deck literally no, it handed into been doing this work for a number of years. And it's like a number of years worth of seeing
kind of a pile up of what could be avoided by actually doing the thing that we're taught to do by our own Prophet salallahu Salam in our own tradition of getting the help. Clearly their medicines weren't empty, they clearly were filled with people that needed the help. And so they created the institutions, they created the programming, they created the treatments. My friends, my sisters, my brothers, they created this. The earliest of these happened right after the time of the Prophet sallallahu Sena, he ordered the very first of them to be created, and the standard loan institutions actual brick and mortar institutions, from as early as the eighth century psychiatric word boards as
early as the eighth century.
So
are we somewhat convinced now, Inshallah, I'll end with this, let's remember in sha Allah that all of the prophets were sent to us as role models and examples. And the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam in himself, was the best example of
holistic well being balanced well being balanced, whether it's emotional, mental, spiritual, intellectual, physical, all of it is very much balanced together. This is the tradition of arson, Nestle Allahu on the prophets of Allah wa to send them and that our Muslim pioneers, our noble predecessors really pioneered in this field that we today call mental health, and we hope Inshallah, that we'll have many from our communities going forward, many of you in sha Allah, who are in this pipeline are really contributing to something that I believe the Muslims had a beautiful tradition and heritage of, but somewhere along the way, we seem to have lost the sense of that, and it's time
to revive it at sha Allah in the best way, bridging, of course, the best of modern medicine, but also understanding that we have a holistic methodology that differs than just the straight way you see psychiatry today and needs some fixing as well. That holistic fixing that can come and lend from Islam. So the two together I think, can be something very powerful and I hope Inshallah, that prophetic example continues to live forward and that we're able to benefit not only the Muslims, but even all of humanity, this is my dua all of humanity 100 in lanhydrock Malala mean, Barack Obama who was a Loma Linda had the Mohamed Juan early he was going to use
a icon
check Do we have time for it was or I we started to ask questions and maybe after sha Allah
we do
if some have questions about the workplace and
what he
came up
to acknowledge him during the
day embark upon cultural traditions that we don't want to acknowledge less religious, I think more than was more tribal and cultural things that lead on this helping as a family and I think still education but not only education about the topic itself, a lot of religion also how
teach us how to provide
acknowledged us.
Tata coffee, thank you so much for that comment. I appreciate it.
Some people, it's really, it's really a challenge to acknowledge that there is a problem. And you also mentioned that don't be that person who was in the way of your husband or in the way of their child to get help. What if the person who needs help is the leading member of the family, for example, fathers, or husbands most of the time, they're the head of the families. And they're also breadwinners, their provider, their protector. And that kind of becomes a matter of their egos to acknowledge that there is a problem with the rest of the family really wants to take the father to her and be really more supportive, because what can the family members do?
And I'll clarify, thank you for much of the question. I'll just repeat it so that everyone can hear it as well. The question is, what happens if the person who needs the help may be the head of the family? The person who's leading the family, if you will? And if so, are you saying they're not willing? Or you're worried about their ego?
Yes,
it is, I agree with you about the challenge part. Anytime we don't acknowledge, in fact, subhanAllah in therapy, when in this field, one of the first things we tell people is, in order to be able to start to move the needle, one of the very first steps is acknowledgement. And you can't really go anywhere without it. If a person isn't willing to acknowledge that there is a problem, or that there is help that's needed, then you're right, it's very hard to do so. So what do you do?
First, there's a there's two points to this one has to do with the ego. And one has to do with getting the help for someone who doesn't want to get the help. I'll address the not getting the help first. And then I'll talk about the ego part.
Often, I tell people, Look, there's different approaches you can take for somebody who probably needs that help, you can see the Help as they need the help, but they're not willing.
Maybe they're not willing to listen to you. But there may be somebody else that they're willing to listen to. So I often say whose support can you leverage? Do they have a brother do they have a father, an uncle, even the Imam, somebody who that they respect. And maybe that person, when they say it to them, they hear it differently either say the same things from Allah, but they hear it differently from somebody else, that they respect that they honor that they are able to live with to leverage their support. Sometimes the issue is knowledge. Right? They don't realize that there's actually something related even from within our deen, that gives a full permissibility for this and
encourages this, in fact, right. So maybe it's knowledge, sometimes the issue has to do, as you said, with ego. And this often is much more cultural than it is anything else. But it's also this the communities that we build, because we cause that Subhanallah
as in to say if they were communities, that was much more normative. And you will see this now and in fact, so many of the, you know, fellow people who are people who speak, you know, the shoe conditioning cards, and the people who are stronger than it was to others. You know, I often say to them, I know that many of them are in therapy, because we have private conversations. But I say to them, if you're willing, and when you're willing, and you feel it's the right time, when you're on the microphone, say even in the middle of a hotspot in the middle of a class, you might say and when I'm in therapy, because because some of you probably have Oh, shucks Owens was in therapy. And it's
an but what does it do? It normalizes the conversation. why it makes sense that they wouldn't be they're carrying so much stress and burden soprano. They're carrying an entire community on their shoulders. It makes sense they wouldn't be, but somehow normalizing the conversation. Now you'll see, especially for those who are on social media, you'll see this, you're talking about athletes, actors and entertainers, whoever. If everyone's talking about mental health and therapy, it's like the new buzzword out there. And for better or for worse, it's starting to normalize the conversation a little bit. So when a person does say a big shot person says, and I go to therapy, it's not like
woowoo. It's like, oh, yeah, that makes sense. So they have a lot that they're dealing with. It makes sense, right? So we start to normalize this, you start to break away some of the ego issues. So it's really about a community.
We're in a community I'll tell you this much where I normally am on a Friday night is my own home community, my own home masjid,
where I live in California. So Pamela, and that Ohana foundations that have already come to the sisters. A lot of my Holika sisters are actually watching online, because I normally I'm with them on a Friday night, doing our holidays and this is in California. And within the masjid, intend to unity
within the Masjid. We literally have a therapy office. And the reason and it's interesting people are like, Why? Because in the years that we've done this, what I have found, what I have found is that about half of our community literally will not send their children or themselves will not go to therapy unless it's within somewhere they trust.
So they wouldn't they wouldn't go they wouldn't let their child go anywhere else unless it was literally outside of them Mr because this is the safe space. The other half
But our community wanted nothing to do
anything that's all related to them. They wanted it to be like an actual medical building. So the so we have a medical clinic that's actually in an actual, separate building. And we needed that we needed the two pronged approach. And it was very important. And we found people were starting to utilize services by having these two different are multiple different kinds of models of service. Why do I say this? The community that we created became one of mental health language, you go into the MCC today sit down to the MCC oshoala, which is our my home Masjid Al Hamdulillah. And you'll see that the conversations on mental health is very common. Yes, okay, maybe because I could
probably because every week, but the reality is, people started to talk the language and mental health, it became much more normalized. And then you started to see the husbands the father is the breadwinner start to come through. And if they weren't willing, at first, you know, what I do very often in therapy, I do a lot most of my work is with a woman and with women, young and old. And,
you know, they'll say my husband isn't willing, my father isn't willing, etc. And I'll say, how about we do one family session, one family session. And I don't mean to trick anybody rather, it's actually very helpful for me to understand what is the backdrop so I'll say to the husband, I need you to come to this one session. Because it helps me you get to complain, you, you get to tell me what's happening. From your point of view. They're like, Oh, I can complain about my life. Excellent. I'll be there.
But anyhow, they'll come and they'll come to the session and what it does, it gives me a sense of what's happening in the background, but more importantly, and maybe as equally importantly, it breaks the ice.
You fear the unknown. You're not sure what this whole therapy thing is, but when they're there, they're kind of like, oh, is this it? This this is okay. Actually, I think I could benefit from this. I have so many husbands after that session, say I think I can benefit from this, that we refer them for their own session as well.
Hopefully one of these aspects work and Shama know.
There's a brother here, then we can come back and Shalva.
Thank you.
So there'll be myself but not for you. Thank you for that courageousness.
Somebody is seeking therapy. They kind of wait till they're in a crisis space.
Just kind of just an open question here is Where do people go to get resources? Yeah, that's a great question. So you're talking about resources as in ahead of time.
Even in an emergency situation, okay.
A big challenge. Yes, yes. So this is true. And I also agree with the idea of like, we wait sometimes until it's, I don't want to say too late, but it's late in the game. Right.
So a couple of ideas. I do know that there is a group in Michigan, or there's a group of mental health providers that are put together, I know if anyone's here from that group in Michigan, anyone here from our Michigan Muslim mental health group, there is a group Mashallah. And I know that they have been pulling together the resources that are part of the Michigan Community. So basically, Metro Detroit, or just all of Michigan, kind of who are the therapists who are the resources on our and I'm leaving here some information both depends for you guys on the bookmarks. But on Madison's website, this is the nonprofit that I've helped found. On the Resources tab of our website, we
actually have listed the different directories that have on it. We don't know everybody there, but we know that they're all Muslims. So we've gathered together as many Muslim mental health professionals across the US as we could find. And so you'll find actually a list specifically for Michigan on there. And I hope inshallah that's useful. So that's providers. And then in addition to that, there's also the kind of resources that are just how do you keep up with mental wellbeing? So one of the things I'd like to actually invite you all to do is if you're part of our mailing list, one of the things you'll find is we do every month, a mental wellness healing circle or learning
circle. Learning circles are about topics on mental health. So this this month, for example, is actually yesterday or the day before, we actually had one on men's mental health, Muslim, men's mental health was actually specifically for that June is related to men's, men's mental health. So that was the topic but you can find the recording on our YouTube channel. And then sometimes when there's a crisis that happens, like across the Ummah, will actually do a healing circle. And so those are helpful too, because it's just the moment of like being able to tap into something that kind of grounds you again, and we've done one just recently for Sudan, prior to that to the
earthquakes in Turkey and Syria, and so on and so forth whenever there's a crisis in the OMA and there's many of those that happen as well. So hopefully, those resources can just jumpstart being able to tap into something consistently that helps with some of the mental health and well being,
of course.
Still good.
We're done. We're done and shallow because of melody. Well, let's let's plan to cello will end here. I'll kind of just to kind of wrap up, closing very quick to Ah, I see there's a couple more hands but I can be around a cello.
After the prayer to answer one on one some of the remaining questions we have
BarakAllahu li comb first my gratitude to the entire community and to all of those who have attended on this Friday night. I really appreciate your presence here and to our Imam and hamdulillah and also to the Unity Center that is always very particular and talking about mental health Michelle, I really appreciate that. Similar Ramadan Rahim wa sallahu model had the Muhammad Ali was off to use an imaginary unit Luke era blossoming into one with a look at Lana with Ramona and Lola and Alfonso Nadal poem and Catherine Elena said who can talk for under your happiness a look into her dinner with a dinner with a John in a suburban Lima?
Y'all Allah we ask you in this gathering tonight this gathering of knowledge and this blessed days of nights of good hija Yatta be these blessed days we asked me a Kadeem to please showering your mercy down upon us on our STRB with Islam on a rest with email and make a CRP from those who are connected to you and connected to those who are connected to you. You ought to be making these knights of ours blesseth knights allow us to reach you academe The Day of Arafah allow it to be a day in which all of the dwarves we say are most of the job are accepted. And we asked you to believe me that this time next year you find us all gathered at hedge you're up and running and to make ESEA
Kadeem from those we're all gathered at the hold of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam on the Day of Judgment. Yeah, Kadeem and they were a people that go we are those who go straight to agenda.
The highest levels of gender therapy without previous a setup or judgments been handled in Iraq Alameen wa sallahu WA and howdy Mohammed Voila, it was produced an imaginary while many people would would Hideo nos was salami who couldn't make NSL okay RPB serie Surah did fatty Han for acceptance of this dua, please take a moment and read so little fatty.
BarakAllahu pico was Santa Monica motorhomes Allahu wa barakato