Omar Usman – 3 Things I Learned from Everyone Communicates Few Connect John Maxwell
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In this video, the speaker discusses three things he learned from the book Everyoneinicles: Few Connect by John Maxwell. The first thing is that communicating is about putting others first, and the second is that communicating is about finding common ground with the audience. He emphasizes the importance of finding a common ground and finding a way to approach the audience in a way that is authentic to them. He also shares his own experiences with miscommunication and how it can affect the audience's perception.
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In this video I'm sharing 3 things I
learned from the book Everyone Communicates, Few Connect
by John Maxwell. Now the basic premise is
basically the title that we all get up
and communicate. We speak, we present, we teach.
Some of us communicate, but some of us
establish a real connection with our audience. Let
me give you an example.
You've got 2 professors.
Now let's say that they're both teaching the
same course, the same curriculum,
the same syllabus, the same textbook, the same
body of knowledge, they're both communicating the same
information over the course of a semester,
yet one professor
has
a line out the door. There's people waiting
to take her course, there's a waiting list,
people can't get in, and the other professor,
the class is empty. People don't want to
take a class with that professor. What's the
difference? The knowledge is the same, the information
is the same, they're both communicating, but only
one is connecting. How does that happen? That's
what we break down in this book. The
first thing that I learned was that communicating
is about putting others first. Now that sounds
really simple, but the reality is that when
we communicate
we oftentimes put ourselves first without realizing it.
When we put ourselves first we can see
a lot of signals. For example, if we're
needy we seek praise. If we are insecure
we seek validation from our speaking. If we
wanna if we're egotistical we wanna be lifted
up, and even if we sometimes communicate out
of responsibility,
we want to be seen as someone of
being, you know, acting in good faith.
The reality is when we get up and
speak, when we communicate, when we present, if
we're thinking about ourselves we're worried about how
do I look, how do I come across,
what are people gonna think about me, what
image will people have, am I gonna get
invited back.
All of these questions and concerns
are reflected back on myself.
Whereas when I put others first, the questions
become more of what's the message, what am
I communicating to the audience, how can I
serve them, how can I be gracious to
them, how can I showcase my gratitude to
them for being able to present to them?
It's a very subtle shift in mindset, but
it has a huge impact.
I have to change my mindset to being
one of someone who's giving to the audience,
not someone who's taking from them.
The audience is primarily concerned with, how can
you help me? What value are you adding
to me? Do you care about me? The
audience is concerned with how you made them
feel. Did you provide value to them? Did
you showcase that you care about them? And
that only comes from being in that mindset
of someone who's giving and serving the audience,
as opposed to what do I get out
of this by presenting? The second thing that
I learned was that intellect is not enough.
I alluded to this in the introduction.
The information that you're conveying
is not enough to connect with someone. We
think that a lot of times if we
lay out information,
we lay out a logical sequence of facts,
that we will somehow persuade an audience to
our way of thinking, will persuade them to
accept whatever messages that we're delivering,
but that doesn't work because we're overestimating
how receptive an audience is. We're thinking more
in terms of what we have to give
them, and we're thinking less about how receptive
they are, what barriers there are to them
accepting that message. You know, someone who's a
very charismatic speaker that's able to connect with
an audience, they recognize that.
They come across as having that unselfish attitude
that lets people feel that connection. We talked
about this a little bit when I shared
3 things I learned from the book Charisma
Myth, which I'll share in the link in
the description down below. In order to connect
see the information,
it has to be there. It's still a
prerequisite. Without the information, you have nothing.
But once the information is there, there has
to be an emotional connection.
It comes from your energy, your passion, your
intensity,
and you're connecting with the audience.
The 3rd lesson I learned from this book
was to find common ground.
Now common ground, again, this is one of
those common sense things, but it's making sure
that you're approaching the audience from the same
framework that they're already in. Do you really
understand
what the audience knows, what they feel, and
what they think? Now a lot of times
miscommunication
happens
because we assume that we already know what
they think. We assume
that we know what mindset they're in, what
framework they're operating out of, and then when
we get up and communicate to them there's
there's some kind it's 2 ships passing in
the night because we're in a different framework
or a different paradigm.
The other mistake that we make is that
sometimes we it's not just assuming that we
know what they want. Another way that miscommunication
happens is that we
don't care to know what they know or
feel or think or we simply we don't
want to know.
Anytime we do this we're dismissing the audience's
concerns
and we're becoming more selfish in our presentation.
Nelson Mandela said that if you talk to
a man in a language that he understands
it goes to his head. But if you
speak in his language it goes to his
heart. And that's the emotional connection that we're
trying to create when we talk about connecting
with someone. Finding that common ground with the
audience is coming to them from the same
framework that they're in, and that willingness
to
maybe put my own biases aside,
and look at things from their perspective, and
come to them from their perspective,
that willingness helps me to find that common
ground,
and that common ground
is the secret to connecting instead of simply
communicating.
That's 3 things I learned from the book
Everyone Communicates.
If you connect, a link to the book
in the description down below. Make sure you
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