The speakers stress the importance of protecting oneself and others from drought, saving people's birthright, and setting goals for oneself. They stress the need to be firm in one's success and to avoid negative language and set goals for oneself. The speakers also emphasize the importance of grounding and focusing on one's mental health to achieve long-term goals. They stress the need for control over one's thoughts and feelings and emphasize the importance of using " acknowledge your anxiousness" to connect with the "immediate of your heart." They also mention a webinar on this topic.
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Alright, so now I can recommend to everyone Oh Vanessa Marina shape hauntings melanoma Hainan handed
in Angola anime What are wanting on one knew what after about two minutes of being Muslim
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because silica Mohammed in Salalah why he was so long winded only He also became a southern Seaman
cathedra I want to welcome you all on behalf of European Institute to this special webinar I want to
welcome our guests and our fellows actually sister sada and sister Nigel as well and thank them for
taking the time out to do this and May Allah subhanaw taala make it easy for everyone the last panel
to allow everyone to come out of this stronger with more reward with more perspective with more
gratitude with more closeness to Allah subhanaw taala close to their families, greater appreciation
of their health, the blessings and so much more inshallah tada in this in this in this very unique
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time. And I think in sha Allah Tada, I probably have the least beneficial things to say, out of out
of the three of us on this on this webinar. So I'll start with just two things inshallah they're
actually dropped requests, our brothers and sisters in Christchurch, New Zealand,
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Subhan, Allah, special special people who have suffered tremendously under you know, the
circumstances, not just that of last year, but also this year. And, you know, tomorrow and of
course, New Zealand's far ahead of us, those of us that are in the United States marks the one year
anniversary of that terrible terrorist attack. May Allah subhana wa tada Have mercy on the umlauts
on those that have passed, except in the Shahada, LS Panasonic comfort their families, and allow
them to find peace and joy in this world and tranquility in this world and then ultimately be joined
with their, with their families with their loved ones, in the same rank and station in the hereafter
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ultimate, I mean, so please keep them in your jobs at this time. Somehow, I was supposed to be in
New Zealand this weekend. And so it's been on my mind, and I just got the message from the families
that they actually cancelled all the programs in Christchurch. So you can imagine even as one year
passes, they're not able to gather in the messages, they're not able to, to come together and
comfort one another with what will surely be a grueling day for them. So that's one thing with
perspective, when we're talking about thinking of those who have suffered far more than we have,
please specifically remember them because I think that coverage will be lost with everything else
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going on right now. Secondly, I posted something about share. So headline here, a man of great
public, you know, great virtue, who's done a lot for the community. And his family has also been
through a lot
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checks ahead as a teacher at the Boston Islamic Seminary in Boston has done a lot for the local
community over there. And is well known to students with knowledge and scholars and people that are
acquainted with the tradition. And he suffered a stroke last month I posted about that, and his
elderly mother passed away in July, yesterday and his father is also elderly and not doing well
right now and check Sohail is recovering, and of course, his siblings are going through a very rough
time as well. So please keep them in your drive as well and Charlottetown and then finally,
everybody else that that will not get Facebook mentions or, or make any type of headlines, but that
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are going to be made even more vulnerable through this, the families of those that will pass away.
And in the headlines, it'll just be an uptick in the number of casualties in that particular
country. But to them, it would have been a father, a mother, a husband, a wife, a sister, a son, a
daughter, so please keep keep all of those people in your drought inshallah. And may Allah subhanaw
taala, activate us, not just protect us from this, but may allow us to activate us to be of use to
people in a way that's beneficial.
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We should not just be seeking to protect ourselves, we should not just be seeking to make it through
this ourselves. We should be seeking to be as beneficial to everyone around us as possible through
these times whether that's in the capacity of offering spiritual guidance, emotional support, food
and drink and supplies and groceries, volunteering in our communities. I really do hope that allied
uses each and every single one of us in a way that's beneficial. So please keep that in mind when
we're talking about shifting the mindset and the perspective that the goal is to be not just
protecting
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But to be connected to Allah and to be useful to the people, and in the process of that be even more
connected to a loss of habitat. So I want to address this from a different perspective than I did in
the multiple years. I keep saying cultivo, because it seemed like it wasn't really a hotel. But I
want to address this from a different way, which is I want to specifically talk about the role of
drought here the role of supplication, because I know that sister sada and Sister najwa, Vinay Tato,
will, you know, get into some of the more practical tips and Sharma with this. But when it comes to
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one of the things that we find from the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is that you're at,
stabilizes, there actually stabilizes your core. And that's why if you think about the most frequent
draft of the prophets a whole lot when he was young will probably Baku sub it's called biala Dena ko
Turner of hearts, make my heart firm on your religion. The idea is that everything around you and of
course, that has a very specific context, which is that a person remains firm on guidance, and does
not go astray that the heart turns so frequently. But, you know, if you connect that to the larger
picture, everything around us panela is in constant motion. The world around us is in constant
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motion. And just like an earthquake, you know, we get so used to the earth being stable that if the
earth shakes from under us, we'll call an insanity malahat. And a human being says, What's wrong
with it? There's an expectation that this was supposed to be stable. This was not supposed to be
moving, right? I because I've never encountered the earth shaking from beneath me. So a person
wouldn't naturally say, Man, what's happening here? Why is the earth shaking? Why is this house not
providing me the protection that was supposed to provide me? Why is my health giving in? Why Why is
why are things closing down, right? We took so many things not just for granted, you know, in the
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capacity of appreciating our blessings, but we also depended on things and considered them to be
stable when they weren't really stable at all. And that's actually the point is that everything
around us is in constant motion. Our our circumstances are always vulnerable. We are always
vulnerable. Even if we do everything to solidify at the at the at the physical level. We're always
vulnerable to something and do has the stabilizing effect. yarmulke LIBOR colusa bits can be idealic
alternative hearts make my heart firm on your path that allows us to be connected to a loss of
Hannah, which Allah who is unaffected by any circumstances, do our allows us to long for the
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inevitable to long for that reward with Allah subhanho wa Taala, as everything around us is always
going to change. We don't know what's going to happen to us tomorrow. But we do know that at some
point, we're going to meet a loss of control, and to be connected to that inevitable reality. And to
not just have more perspective on what is stable and what is not, but to actually actively seek to
stabilize yourself. And the only one who cannot be moved or changed by anything else, is a means of
actually making yourself more firm. Right? So if you think about the downs of the profit slice on
the applications of the profit slice of them, there's a category of neurons that have a lot to do
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with setbacks, which is firmness is the karma, right? It's the karma is to is to remain is to remain
binded on the path. You know, this, this idea of resisting the change of circumstances and keeping
our hearts firm. There are also the drafts of the prophets lie Selim and you know, a lot of people
are going to be looking for which do i do i make for this circumstance, right? You're going to find
your eyes about health, their eyes about anxiety do is about how to deal with stress. But remember
that every drop that you make every moment of his thought, every moment of seeking forgiveness, from
every moment of connecting to your Creator, is a means of bringing about goodness in your life and
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as a means of warding off harm. Right? So it's not just the dryness is not just the supplications
that are specific, right? So last time I mentioned two reasons for example, that prevent that
prevent that, that prevent punishment, hardship coming upon people, which is the profit slice lm
being amongst them, welcome your stuff, they don't or that they're in a state of seeking forgiveness
from a loss of habitat. And that's why when we look at the supplication of Yunus it is out of the
prophet Jonah, peace be upon him. You know, Yunus it is salam, when he asked a lot to protect him or
he asked a lot to change his circumstances, as he was, and I know we, you know, we're going to use
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the word quarantines in every single way, but isolated in the belly of that whale. As I'm loving
Massoud on the lower end hosa illustrating just such a powerful way in the darkness of the belly of
that whale and the darkness of the bottom of the ocean.
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The darkness of the night I mean completely away from everyone and he calls out to Allah subhana wa
tada La ilaha illa Anta Subhana kidney quantum in a blinding me learn you know, learn to subhanak it
when you come to learn you know
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there is no god but you how perfect are you? I was from the wrongdoers there is no god but you how
perfect are you I was from the wrongdoers. And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam mentioned
that there is no doubt that removes hardship like that. There's nothing in there that actually says
Allah remove hardship from but it's the it is, is the connection to Allah subhana wa Tada. It is the
acknowledgment of allows greatness and glory. It is the acknowledgement of our own shortcomings, and
everything that's embedded within those inherently that allows for these things to actually ward off
harm from us.
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And so think about doing as a whole the entirety of drop, think about you know, if you've been
lacks, and I'll see if I've been if we've been lacks right with our Cardoso back with myself which I
do the daily remembrances in the morning and in the evening, the supplications that we're supposed
to be saying throughout the day, are weird, which is our daily regimen of seeking forgiveness of
this default or tests via which is saying some kind of law declaring the laws glory or praise and
hamdulillah or to compete aren't saying Allahu Akbar, that hello and afford to love Allah. Right,
these are which means that there is no power or might accept of that which is with Allah. So these
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daily remembrances if we've been lacks with them, this is a time for us to actually regain them in a
very, very, you know, in a very regular way. Right, and to find deeper meaning and, and all of those
prayers, all of those supplications all of those of God, all of those remembrances are a means by
which we stabilize our core. And we connect ourselves to the one who is unmoved and unchanged by
everything that happens around us. And we long for that which is promised for us, which is the
reward of agenda. There is no disease and agenda. There is no earthquake agenda, nothing happens in
Paradise, where our blessings can be taken away from us once we get there we are there in the
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nighttime so we longed for that which Allah has promised us and in doing so, within nahi tada we
find some sort of peace and tranquility in you know, in the midst of our own making drop out Who are
you by the supplication is worship, so let's increase in that inshallah Tada. And then the last
thing I'll say, inshallah, then I'll hand it over.
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This idea of good deeds, warding off harm, good deeds warding off harm. This is embedded in many a
Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam. prophets like Selim said that nothing Ward's awards off
or changes a person's lifespan, like something like charity. And remember, charity is not just
restricted to the financial, really deeply think, with your community in the next few weeks, how you
can be a positive force of good with everything and everyone around you think about those elderly,
that cannot fulfill their basic needs right now. Think about those people that you know, were
already vulnerable that have just been made so much more vulnerable, activate yourself towards that,
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and you do not see the forces of Allah subhanaw taala and warding off for him from you may be very,
very clear. It could be that something harmful was destined for you, but because of some good that
you do a loss of kinda Tyler changes your decree, right, because the profit slice I mentioned that
good deeds can change the decree. So you're not going to get a message that by the way, you were
supposed to have this happen to you tomorrow, but because you went out and you did something good,
or because you you offered some sort of benefit, or because you connected to a line this way, it got
warded off, you're never going to know that because that's not that's not accessible knowledge to
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you. Right, that's a loss of habitat is knowledge. That's a loss of time as a Divine Decree. It's
not something that we can access. But we can be assured by the principle, right that doing good is a
means of warding off harm, doing good for ourselves in the forms of our personal rebound, doing good
for others around us, engaging in that community benefit and Sharla trying to take care of those
around us. And these times, those are means by which a lot Ward's off harm that otherwise would have
been destined for us. So engage those regularly. Don't be reckless with them. Don't be like, Well,
in that case, and I'm not gonna forget about this whole social distancing thing right? Now engage it
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with with caution, but with love and with Karen Charlottetown as you go out there, and we do these
things. So think with your local community. What can you do in sha Allah to be a part of
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to be a part of this? And the last thing
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I would say is, look, okay, see, this is a this is not mindless stuff
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because it's it's a lot more
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it's a lot more used than probably my last parents after give us some holiday mishaps that were
passed down from our parents, they always have beat up pages. And, and you know, the covers are used
because of how often these mishaps were used and obviously, we use our phones now and things of that
sort. But don't just don't just say, Okay, I'm gonna start reading quota and every day actually give
yourself a goal. Just like in Ramadan, you've got a you know, you've got your goal of how much
you're going to read a day, think about how much gold you're going to read every day from now set it
and set a goal that's that's modest to start with and shop matana whether it's five pages or 10
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pages, or whatever it may be the set that goal for yourself in Charlottetown and keep with it and if
you see yourself able to do commit to it over the next few days in sha Allah, then move it up a
little bit okay, so set a goal five pages for example 10 pages but make it a point to do so
inshallah time every day. And I promised myself I wasn't going to say this corny joke, but I will
pour anti or anti yourself Alright, so so you can you can
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I don't know if someone else has used that but definitely use these moments inshallah Tada, and my
last contact, connect this through to the and and to him in these days. I'm going to go ahead and
pass it over to sister.
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I believe that sister Solomon's going next to her sister, oops, I
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think it was okay, so I'm gonna go ahead and pass it over and show to Sister najwa or sister sada.
Whoever was a sister silent schottlander? No.
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Whoever is next? I'm sorry, I lost the order. I can't see the chat.
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Does that let me actually come on. It's a so I'm going to be next inshallah. My name is Sofia
Sultan, I'm a fellow with the European Institute and licensed mental health counselor and
professional counselor come to LA. So does that qualify it on shahabad for the the wonderful tips.
There were a couple that really resonated with me, Mashallah. And so I wanted to delve into them
even a little bit, a little bit more, and trauma. So one of them that really resonated was this idea
of the reliance on LS Pat data that we already all do on a daily basis, right, the idea of us, being
the almighty being the creator being the most powerful being our protector, right. And the idea that
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he's the one who created the Coronavirus that we're all talking about and that everybody's really
concerned about. But in that understanding, we also realize that he's more powerful than it. And
knowing that on a daily basis, we're already relying on all US data every single day, every moment
of the day, every breath that we take in, and we noticed that the air actually accesses our lungs,
every time our heart beats, right. Any time we are doing anything in our daily lives, it is a
reminder of the power of electronic data. And it's a reminder of our dependence and reliance on
electronic data. So in knowing that our health is always in his hands, right. And knowing that on a
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small level on a daily basis, when we might not always think about it. But in a time like this, when
we're all worried about our health. It's a really intense reminder of that. And it reminds me of the
area where Alice kinda reminds us, he says, who has fed them, saving them from hunger, and made them
safe saving them from fear, right. And so even if we're feeling fearful at this point, it's a
reminder that even in these difficult moments, and in the easy moments are less proud that it is the
one who's saving us from all of these hardships on a daily basis.
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And the other thing that she had mentioned, which I thought was really that really resonated with
me, was the idea that life is always in flux, right? That life is constantly changing, that there's
a certain degree of uncertainty that our lives are filled with. But we tend to have this idea that
our lives are very predictable, because in our experience, they have been right. on most days, if
you're like an average person, you're either waking up in, you know, eating breakfast and going to
school or going to work, you know, driving the same route, seeing the same people and things like
that you have a routine. And that gives us the idea and the misconception that life is predictable.
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And when something like this happens where suddenly everything
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is changing in just in just a couple of weeks, right or even less, you know, when you go to the
grocery store and all the rocks are like cleaned out of fresh produce and meat when your kids school
has been canceled, like my kids school has been canceled and you're trying to navigate that, right?
When you hear news reports that can be really scary. Suddenly, the immunity we thought we had to
unpredictability. This is this is just like a huge reminder, like a huge dose of uncertainty. You
know, in reality, I had heard a talk by Dr. shefali, sabari. She's a really well known psychologist.
And one of the things she said was two days ago, we didn't know if we'd be alive right now. Right?
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We didn't know we assumed, but we didn't know. And so we're always living with uncertainty, but we
just tend to deny that uncertainty. And so now we have this heavy dose of it. And so how do we use
that dose of uncertainty for the purposes of growth?
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One of the things that
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measure one I often do, we're both therapists, right? So one of the things that we often do with our
clients is that we try to teach them a skill called distress tolerance, right? Which is basically
that whenever we're uncomfortable with something, we all have a human tendency to try and avoid that
discomfort to push it away, to deny it to avoid it in whatever way we can. Right. And everything
that's happening with the Coronavirus brings so much discomfort to the forefront for us. And one of
the blessings that we have is that we have this huge, like surge of an opportunity to sit with
discomfort, to learn how to deal with distress and to learn how to accept the reality of a situation
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and what's outside of our control, while also focusing in on working on what is within our control.
So it's a really powerful opportunity if we can view it in that way. inshallah, I think one of the
other powerful things that happens when something major occurs in our lives, whether it's something
traumatic, or whether it's something like what's happening right now, with everything happening with
the Coronavirus, and our worries about it is that it really helps us to shift gears into focusing in
on the big picture in our lives, focusing in on what we truly believe to be important. The things
that we suddenly realized that we're willing to forego for the sake of health and safety, those are
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the things that are truly important to us. And so suddenly, we realized that a lot of the other
things that we had been prioritizing, maybe they aren't as much of a priority as we once thought
they were right and focusing in on that and using that and taking it into our daily lives once
inshallah things get back to normal.
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The other thing I wanted to mention also is that if you are feeling nervous, if you're feeling
fearful, if you're feeling overwhelmed with everything that's that's going on, and if it's bringing
up a lot of anxiety, then just realize that that is really normal for that to be happening. It's
when when so much of our lives change very suddenly, it is very normal to have a level of anxiety.
And so have a little bit of self compassion, where you're telling yourself like, of course, I'm
feeling a little bit anxious who wouldn't feel a little bit anxious in a situation like this, right?
It doesn't mean that you're not relying on a less Pat data, it just means that change is hard. And
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that's a very normal thing.
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And to kind of elaborate on that point, and why that might be happening for you and for a lot of us.
And why that might look different in different people is the idea of like the fight flight or freeze
mode that we tend to get into when we are in a difficult situation. So some anxiety is a very normal
thing. And it can actually be a really big protective factor. Anxiety is an emotion that is pandemic
created within us. And so it exists for a reason. And one of the really amazing functions of it is
that it can be very protective. It it's what gets us to look both ways before we cross the street.
It's what gets us to not touch a hot stove. Right? It helps us to make smart decisions at moments
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when we need to be cautious. What happens sometimes is that it kind of gets a little bit over
activated. And the survival part of our brains get a little bit too energetic. And what happens in
those moments is that the front parts of our brains which are responsible for healthy decision
making good judgment calls, they don't function as strongly because they're so we're kind of in
survival mode. And so you know when we see people fighting over a roll of paper towels
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In the grocery store, that's the survival part of their brain that's coming up rather than the, you
know, rather than the healthy judgment, decision making part of their brain, their survival mode is
in overdrive. And the reason why it gets into overdrive is because of the what ifs. You know, if we
stop and think for a moment about whether our lives will be so different, if we, you know, have this
one paper towel roll from the grocery store, or whether it wouldn't, then most of us would stop and
make the decision that yeah, it's not going to impact my life tremendously, right. But it's the what
ifs that keep our minds going toward anxiety. And the problem homosassa Lam, he told us, he
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encouraged us, he said that in situations, say Allah did that, which he ordained to do. And your if
opens the gate for shikon. Right? So if when we open the door for if that's how our anxiety are like
arises and it gets, it gets a little bit out of control, and then the decisions that we're making
aren't ones that we'll look back on in the best possible way. Right. So if we know this, then how do
we try to get out of survival mode, and reinvigorate that front part of our brains, that's going to
help us make some better decisions. And so that we can try and deal with the situation and the
anxiety that we're going through in a way that we can look back on with some comfort, and trauma.
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00:27:19
So, Sr nazwa, is going to go into a lot of detail with regards to that. But I wanted to share a few,
a couple of things that she'll then elaborate on with some really practical tips, and chulmleigh.
But one of the main ways that we utilize in in, in therapy, when somebody is really anxious, is a
technique called grounding. Right. And chiffon would actually alluded to it when he was talking
about that. And that being like this firm, tyent, Ellis patata, and like a grounding technique and a
lot of ways. So what grounding is, is that it is a technique that helps you to calm your body,
right. And when you can calm your body, then it sends a signal to your brain that you are safe. And
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it is okay to be calm and shut down that fight flight or freeze survival mode.
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00:28:13
And when you use this, right, when you try and calm your body, then you're focusing in on the what
is right, you're focusing in on the present moment, rather than on the what ifs that shaitan then
uses to get us off track. And I often think about the Hadith of the Prophet homosassa. And when I
think about browning, where when he was in any type of difficult time, he used to turn to be led.
And he used to say, he's asked me not to give the event. And he would say, oh, Bella, give us rest
with it. Right? Where he would know that Salah prayer could be that act of engaging in prayer could
be a way of grounding himself and calming and connecting with a less past data in a really powerful
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way. And the actual act of Salah because it uses our bodies, and we're using movement. And we're
actually you know, when we're Institute we're touching the ground, right literally grounding, that
actually can be a really helpful way to to calm ourselves and to calm our minds. Other ways could be
to hug somebody that you really care about and to really feel that hug or focusing in on one of your
five senses, to really focus in on the present moment. And then also deep breathing, deep breathing
is is a very common one and very, very helpful.
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00:29:33
So the other part of it too, when we're thinking about grounding and focusing in on the present
moment is focusing in on the feeling of safety that you can experience right now, instead of going
down to what is right. So asking yourself, am I okay, right now? Do I have enough right now? Do I
have enough food? Do I have enough? Toilet paper? Right? Like everybody's so worried about? Do I
have enough of that right now? And for for addressing the majority of us even though I know that
there are a lot of people who actually can't answer yes to that, right. But in the majority of who
we're talking to right now, the answer would typically be Yes, right.
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Now, just because everybody else is reacting in fear, it doesn't mean that we have to react in fear
and it can actually feel very empowering to shift your focus. So instead of just,
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00:29:59
you know, feeling that fear and going with it, instead allowing yourself to feel that fear, but
still move forward. Right? Do something consciously make a decision and a choice that goes against
your fear
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Right, not in a reckless way. But doing something movement oriented or action oriented can be really
powerful and healing. So enjoying a walk in nature, journaling, verbalizing the things that you're
worried about, because a lot of times the thoughts that we have going in our mind can be a lot
scarier if they stay up there, rather than if we say them out loud. They lose a lot of their power
when you say them out loud.
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00:31:11
So I want to end with a couple of points about how we can shift our mindset as we are going through
all of this. And a lot of this is really applicable in any hardship that we go through, you know,
everything that's happened with the Coronavirus is a test from illustrata in the same way that we
experienced so many other tests right? and remembering the reward associated with tests were the
problem. homosassa Adam says that there's no fatigue, nor disease, nor sorrow or sadness or hurt or
distress that befalls almost them, even if it was a prick he receives from a thorn, but that LS pata
XPS takes away some of his sins for that, right. So everything that we're going through with the
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00:31:54
with this, you know, with a quarantine, with things being canceled, with the disappointment, the
disappointment we might be facing about some things being canceled. All of that is an exploration of
our sins, right? The other thing is strength, right? That almost the power data gives us
capabilities that we need in order to get through difficulties, right? Human beings are incredibly
adaptable. And it's one of the one of the mercies that LS panda has given us. So when we, when we're
in difficult situations, the qualities that come up in difficulties are things to be treasured,
right. Because if we hadn't experienced this difficulty, we may never have known that we had these
00:31:54 -->
00:32:37
qualities to begin with. So things like flexibility, right, being able to be flexible in the time in
a time of a lot of change. That's a huge skill, that if we can hone it now and treasure it now, we
can use it later. Right. The other way is to view this, as I know, it sounds a little bit corny as I
say it but to view this as an opportunity that there are certain things, you know, like for for me,
for example, my my kids are off from school for two weeks. Right? So the question that I asked
myself was, you know, what are things that I can do? Because they're off for two weeks that I
wouldn't have otherwise been able to have the opportunity to do? Right. So spending time with family
00:32:37 -->
00:33:06
trying out new recipes with your kids, things like that, which your mama was mentioning about the
Koran, like imagine how amazing it would be if this test of that we're going through with the
Coronavirus was a way to start a routine of reading daily Quran that we wouldn't have otherwise been
able to implement because our lives would have just gone on as normal, right? So it could be a
really powerful opportunity.
00:33:08 -->
00:33:47
Gratitude searching for, you know, training our brains to search for the things that we have, rather
than the things that we like, if we can do it now, then it's going to be a lot easier to do once in
Sharla things get back to normal. And one thing also, I think it's really important to just pay
attention to the privileges that we have, right? Where that also Salaam told us to look at those
below you and not look at those above you because it's the best way to not belittle the favors of
Allah. Tada. Right. So there is a lot that we might be going through right now, a lot of us, but
knowing that a lot of us are a lot more privileged than other people. But there are some kids whose
00:33:47 -->
00:34:02
schools are closed who rely on their schools for one hot meal a day, who now no longer have that,
right for people who might be let off of work for a couple of weeks because their employer can't pay
them. because nobody's frequenting their restaurant, for example.
00:34:03 -->
00:34:20
For some of the elderly, who their only social interaction, where they may have been so lonely, and
their only social interaction now has been canceled and they have nobody to interact with. Right. So
everything that we're dealing right now with right now is a reminder that other people are
struggling with even more.
00:34:21 -->
00:34:30
And to build on that point, as my as my final couple of points is the idea that
00:34:31 -->
00:35:00
we are in a time where it could be really easy to focus on ourselves and to be consumed with worries
about ourselves. But it can be a lot more powerful to alleviate a lot of our anxiety if instead we
exercise empathy, right? So when you go to the grocery store and you see that there's only one roll
of paper towels left, leave it there for the next person, they might need it more right. And it's it
really brought to mind a at Ellis pathauto when he talks about the day of drying
00:35:00 -->
00:35:42
And how nobody's going to care about anybody else. And they're going to be running away from one
another not caring, where he says that every man on that day will have enough to make him careless
of others. Right? It's not that day yet, right. And if we were in a position where we can still care
about one another, and that's a way that we can really take a great deal from this, and alleviate a
lot of our anxiety and accept the reality of the situation, right, the situation is a reality, it's
not going to change, but we can choose how we're going to interpret the situation and channel our
energy in a positive direction, rather than fighting against the inevitable at this point. So a
00:35:42 -->
00:35:47
handler, I'm just here for listening, and I'm going to pass it off to us as soon as well, inshallah.
00:35:54 -->
00:36:17
So why they can work with local dairy cattle. My name is Mitch Juan, and I'm a psychotherapist in
private practice in Maryland, and I'm also a fellow at the Institute. So she's acamol parasara. And
she'll harmar for really talking about some foundational parts of dealing with Coronavirus from both
a spiritual and a psychological perspective.
00:36:18 -->
00:36:26
There were some points that Sora had mentioned, that I wanted to discuss a little further because
they are just so important.
00:36:27 -->
00:37:13
And, you know, as therapists, a lot of therapists are getting this question of how do I get rid of
my anxiety? And I think this is an important question to look at, because there are different
components to why I feel like there's misunderstandings incorporated into this question. The first
in that, what I was talking about is that anxiety is a normal part of being human. The physiological
response that we have, when there is stress in our environment, a lot created that for a reason we
are adrenaline goes up. And so certain bodily functions may decrease so we can concentrate on that
stressor in our environment. And this helps motivate motivate us, it helps us not be complacent, and
00:37:13 -->
00:37:27
it helps us take action. So this idea that we can be completely free of stress and anxiety is not
really grounded in reality. And then the second part of that anxiety is a normal part of the human
00:37:28 -->
00:37:59
process, right? Nobody comes into life, Nobody leaves, without having encountered some kind of
stress or anxiety. And sometimes we forget in that we create these perfect environments for
ourselves, our homes, or you know, and try with our family. With the ultimately we are here to
worship Allah and this is not a vacation this is where is the life filled with trials and
tribulations. And then we go back that anxiety and stress is an inherent part of life, then we also
look at that question from a different way. So one,
00:38:01 -->
00:38:39
we are, you know, it designed to respond to stress in a certain way, that's part of our
physiological makeup, but to also that we should expect some level of distress and in our everyday
lives, and sometimes it's going to be more than others. And so the issue doesn't really become Well,
how do I get rid of my anxiety? But kind of reframing that to how do I manage my stress and my
anxiety in healthy ways? Because stress isn't inherently bad. It's just when it mobilizes us, when
it prevents us from taking action when it makes us feel so bad that we can't get anything done. And
so,
00:38:40 -->
00:39:02
part of our webinar, we had, you know, some objectives, objectives were to how do we cope
practically, with with this Coronavirus from a psychological perspective, as well as a spiritual
perspective, and I feel like you can't have one without the other mindset is important. But then
also
00:39:03 -->
00:39:38
taking the action to execute some of those things that we really need to do in terms of taking care
of ourselves. So for example, say you do have the mindset, you have the knowledge and the right
spiritual perspective on things. But then you're not doing what you need to do to take care of
yourself, that's a problem. And then if you heavily rely on pop psychology at all those articles
that completely ignore the spiritual part, and then just talk about, well, take a hot bath, eat a
snack, those are all good things, those are all coping skills, but without the spiritual
perspective, then, then then it's lacking. So it's really important that when we are looking at how
00:39:38 -->
00:39:47
do we manage our stress and our anxiety, that we're looking at the mindset, but then also the
concrete and practical things that we need to do day to day.
00:39:49 -->
00:39:59
And another point that both shikamaru and Sarah brought up is the importance of the reminder that we
really aren't in control of our lives and the current
00:40:00 -->
00:40:34
Buyers is such a good reminder of that, that ultimately Allah has control, we don't know how this is
going to play out. We don't know when this is going to end or what it's going to be like. And so
it's really important that we turn to a law and connect with him and know that we are in the best of
hands. And, you know, some people can look at that and feel some anxiety. But then I think we can
also look and say, it's, there's a certain amount of relief from knowing that I don't have control
and Allah is in control.
00:40:35 -->
00:40:52
Now, that being said, although a lot is in control, I think sometimes we lose sight of the things
that we need to do day to day, that we are in control that Allah gave us certain thoughts and skills
and abilities, that certain things that we do need to control in our day to day lives to stay
healthy.
00:40:54 -->
00:41:19
And, and so incorporating that, that Allah is in control, but then also we have responsibilities of
control of our lives, essentially, is that you cannot control what happens to you. But you can
certainly control how you respond to what happens to so you cannot control if you're going to get
sick, or a loved one can get sick. But you can respond. Okay, well, how am I going to cope
00:41:20 -->
00:41:37
when this happens? And so, what I want to talk about today is what are those things that we are in
control of? And how can we use that for our well being and to decrease our stress? So the first
thing that we are in control of is our thoughts.
00:41:38 -->
00:42:21
So and whether or not people are aware of this, but we always have some kind of background noise,
you know, in our mind, and sauna. You know, I know you experienced this too, with sometimes people
come to our office and they say, I have anxiety. And I have no reason. There's no reason why I feel
anxious. I get panic attacks or I'm depressed. But there's no reason why. And to us therapists that
kind of shows the disconnect between our emotions and the thoughts that are behind those emotions.
And so while it's always important to connect those two, I think during times like this, it's very
important for us to when we are anxious to look at why am I anxious to kind of sit with that and
00:42:21 -->
00:42:37
say, Okay, I'm feeling a certain kind of way. Let me think about the thoughts that I'm having. So I
can reflect and then change those unhealthy thoughts. Because most of the time, there are irrational
or unhealthy thoughts that we're not even aware of that are in the background.
00:42:38 -->
00:42:49
And where are these thoughts come from, they come from our upbringing, they can come from TV, we are
sponges, we kind of absorb everything around us. Sometimes we don't even realize we are
internalizing some of these things.
00:42:51 -->
00:43:25
So kind of To give you an example, you know, everybody's talking about toilet paper and paper
towels. So I think the normal the the average person walks into a grocery store, and they see that
most of the toilet paper is gone. And what's that feeling? When you get that feeling that's like
most people, they get that feeling of panic? Did I miss out on something? Maybe everybody knows
something that I don't, maybe something bad's gonna happen. So if you don't think about it, you're
just gonna go and you're going to take that last roll, right? Or you don't you don't you're don't
have the ability to get the rolls, you walk away thinking, feeling really anxious. But if you take a
00:43:25 -->
00:44:02
moment to do it, what is my thought process behind this? And then you kind of think, Okay, well, if
something catastrophic can happen, if I don't have toilet paper, I mean, a few miles down is full of
tissues, and full of you know, others they. So when you start to look at your irrational thoughts,
then you are able to change how you feel. And this sounds like a very stupid example. But I
guarantee you this happened, probably every grocery store across the country, where people don't
think about the thought process behind, they just go straight to the emotion. And so taking that
time to reflect on your thoughts, so you can have more control of the feelings that you have is
00:44:02 -->
00:44:16
really important. And if this is something that you struggle with, you can write it down, you can
get a journal and say, Okay, why am I feeling anxious, and then start to look at the cognitions that
you have behind that so you can change them and make them more healthy.
00:44:17 -->
00:44:26
And going along with the whole control over your thoughts. We also have a big degree of how positive
we choose to be
00:44:27 -->
00:45:00
social scientists, they talk about happiness and where that comes from. And there's lots of
different theories and different opinions. And some people say, you know, it's partly genetics, some
people say, you know, it's your environment, but I think everybody agrees that they're that the
average person that they have a big degree of control over how happy they decide to be that
regardless of your circumstances and your genetics and all that. I think across the board,
researchers think that people have a choice at the end of the day, and how
00:45:00 -->
00:45:26
How much you decide how positive you decide to be and how negative you decide to be. And so during
these times, you can choose to focus on how people might be behaving irrationally or maybe silly. Or
you can look at more positive things like how people are coming together and helping each other. So
you will find whatever you're looking for. So if you're looking for the ugly, you will find that, if
you're looking for the beautiful, you will find that as well.
00:45:27 -->
00:45:45
And ultimately, whatever it is, you're seeking will become a part of you. So it's very important
that you know, you know that you have a choice in deciding whether or not you want to be positive or
negative, but then also the profound effects that it has on your thought process.
00:45:47 -->
00:46:19
And in terms of perspective, thinking good, you know about three things, thinking good about
yourself, thinking good about your environment, and then thinking good about a lot. Because
ultimately, this narrative shapes, how you will look back on the situation. So if you have a victim
narrative, or an angry narrative, that can really lead you down a dangerous path in terms of
spiritual well being and psychological well being, versus something called the redemptive narrative
where you try find the good in every situation.
00:46:20 -->
00:46:33
And one of the things I saw brought up that was very important is gratefulness. When we practice
gratefulness, this will help us look at the good in every situation. Because when you do look at the
good, there's always more good than bad.
00:46:34 -->
00:46:38
And whether you look at it from an aesthetic perspective, or just, you know, in the research,
00:46:39 -->
00:46:56
practicing gratefulness, whether you identify things that you're grateful for every day, throughout
the day, in the morning, in the evening, it has profound effects on well being. So gratefulness is a
very important concept in Islam, but also just in mental health in general.
00:46:58 -->
00:47:08
Another thing that we have control over is our goals. So with all this instability, you know, my
kids are off from school to,
00:47:10 -->
00:47:15
if there's going to be a change in routine people are teleworking, some people might be off from
work. And so
00:47:17 -->
00:47:59
in these situations, it's very easy to lose sight of our long term goals. Because this, in fact, is
a small snippet in time and shall it's going to end whether it's two weeks, six weeks, eight weeks,
or whatnot. And so if you are someone who studies the Quran, it's important that that that's
something you continue to do. If you are doing some kind of program with your kids, that's important
that you have something that you continue to do. If you're writing a book, or you're on some kind of
exorcism, sticking with your long term goals can be incredibly grounding. Instead of getting lost
into Well, let me stay, you know up to date with all the news or let me then you're just kind of,
00:48:00 -->
00:48:39
you're just, it's like you're with the ocean, you're just kind of subject to whatever comes your
way, because you are not exercising that ability over your goals and over your day. And that was a
second thing that I want to talk about in terms of, you know, you're having control over your goals
is having control over your day is my concern. With people staying home, although I see tremendous
amount of benefit, is that just the way on the weekends, or when we go on vacation, people are going
to start to go late, go to sleep late, wake up late, they're not going to be paying attention to
structure and routine. And as human beings, these are things that we really need, we need structure,
00:48:39 -->
00:48:41
we need stability, especially if we have kids.
00:48:42 -->
00:49:08
So being in control of your day, you know, and that's waking up on time, it's exercising, it's
taking scheduled time to read whether to put on or some other intellectual thing that you're doing,
it's going to bed at the same time, these are all things that we need to stay stable. But if we are
starting to be more lacs with those things, I fear that
00:49:09 -->
00:49:22
that can have you know, some some effect on our, our mental health. And then the last thing that we
are in control of is the company that we keep. And you know, we don't have that much control over,
you know, our families.
00:49:24 -->
00:49:55
But, you know, I want us to pay attention to the virtual company that we keep how many of us you
know, spend, you know, certain amount of time on WhatsApp or on Facebook on Instagram, that is
virtual company. If you spend three hours reading a certain publication that has a certain negative
view, or you're part of a Facebook group that is very negative. Those people are in your company
even though it's it's online. And so in order to keep a healthy mindset, making sure that you're
moving people
00:49:56 -->
00:50:00
who are negative or who are not helping
00:50:00 -->
00:50:05
you utilize your time in the best way, during this time that were a lot of us are, are off.
00:50:07 -->
00:50:37
I also wanted to add that if you are someone who has depression or anxiety, this might be a little
bit harder than the average person, right. So it is going to be a little more of an uphill battle.
And but that's okay. I think understanding that acknowledging that is the first step. So I think for
you, it's Paramount, it's even, it's even more important to wake up on time, go to sleep on time,
for example, if you are depressed, you can get yourself out of bed, it's even more important to try
and do that.
00:50:38 -->
00:51:03
Now, you know, some of us are going to be contained, we have to stay home. sunlight is incredibly
important. If you're depressed, maybe you can't go outside, but you can definitely open the window,
keep the blinds open, if you are in a place where you can walk around, you know, there's a lot of
research that talks about how it is to be in nature, where you can walk around and not be in contact
with people that you know, by all means, do that.
00:51:04 -->
00:51:16
So and now with teletherapy, there are a lot of therapists who are able to give therapy online, so
definitely utilize that. Don't think that this is a break, I have to stay home and,
00:51:17 -->
00:51:18
and not do anything.
00:51:19 -->
00:51:36
Um, so you know, just to conclude, I think in terms of coping from psychospiritual perspective, I
think we really have to look at two things. It's, you know, our mindset, within also the actions
that we decide to take day to day, and they're both very important.
00:51:37 -->
00:52:22
And I think you know, the Muslim community, the oma we are very good at listening to webinars and
to, you know, taking classes, and we can be junkies in that way. But we don't always execute, right?
We don't always end up practicing what we learn. So I really encourage after this webinar is over to
do three things, one, kind of write down some things related to mindset that any one of us talked
about three things that you really want to remember and take with you, you know, during the next
several weeks, to remind yourself of what of your long term goals. And if you don't have long term
goals, you know, definitely consider doing that. Because that will not only help you grounding the
00:52:22 -->
00:52:41
situation, but as Muslims, we should have long term goals, or primary goals to worship alone. Of
course, we all have individual responsibilities that we need to take care of, however, that looks
like for each of us. So write down some of your long term goals. And then three, write down some
things that you want to do day to day.
00:52:42 -->
00:53:10
And these are reminders, sometimes it's just the intention that can make a tremendous impact and how
we execute our day. So it could be you know, every night before I go to sleep, I'm gonna make a list
for the next day of what I need to get done. Or every day I'm going to read in an hour or cron, or
you know, it can be whatever, but just the intentionality and writing it down will make it you'll be
much more likely to execute some of those goals inshallah.
00:53:12 -->
00:53:16
Okay, and so now I'm going to take it and turn it back over to shakaama.
00:53:22 -->
00:53:23
So now I need to cancel.
00:53:24 -->
00:53:27
So does that mean Oh, hold on to all of you for
00:53:28 -->
00:54:03
tuning in. And I want to tell it to make a few things and then we'll go to a few announcements. And
we'll go ahead and go to q&a. So first and foremost, while you're looking for things to do, I know
that system as was just said, we're webinar junkies. We're going to be providing content and show as
much as we can to sort of be in touch with with the community throughout this time. There's also a
lot of great existing content. So if you haven't checked out yet been conversations and you're
spending a lot of time with your family, just go to the front page, click conversations and Shawn
and it'll provide some great material for you to discuss things not necessarily related to the
00:54:03 -->
00:54:40
Coronavirus but in general to over content and well structured way in a way that can ensure will
keep your family engaged with something beneficial throughout this time so again, you can go to our
website, go to conversations and do so inshallah tada and you can continue to follow along. If you
click on if you go to webinar got peanuts to do that word, and subscribe. We actually have an
infographic coming out in Charlotte Tata shortly that actually summarizes the notes from this
webinar. So it's very beneficial, something that's shareable, something that you can pass around,
just has some great practical advice in there in Charlottetown about how to proceed spiritually,
00:54:40 -->
00:54:49
emotionally mentally, from here inshallah so again, subscribe webinar dot yuckiness to that organ.
You know, that way you can, you can get it as soon as it comes out in sha Allah.
00:54:51 -->
00:54:59
You know, I'm personally going to try to do as much as I can, while going every day, whether it's a
Facebook Live or an Instagram, live, whatever it may be, inshallah, just to just to be in touch
00:55:00 -->
00:55:29
I think it's important for us to keep on reminding each other just a short beneficial reminder here
there, but as sister Nigel just mentioned, by all means stay practical in Charlottetown don't just
listen, act upon it inshallah. And and don't forget that that joke that I made earlier on time and
teen. Yeah, hold on to yourself and if anyone else preceded me and using that joke please do
identify yourself online so I will happily cede the corniness over to you and give you credit.
00:55:31 -->
00:55:39
But hopefully we ended at least for all of us, which is to read as much as we can. Lastly, before I
go to q&a, inshallah tomorrow there's going to be another webinar
00:55:40 -->
00:55:43
that celebrate Mercy's putting together in Charlottetown.
00:55:44 -->
00:56:09
And you can find the information there The link will also go ahead and send it to everyone. That's
going to be tomorrow at 5pm Eastern sha Allah imams a DR Ingrid Madson others inshallah Tada. So
we're gonna keep this going and collaborate with other organizations as well, just to keep keep in
touch with the community. So please do inshallah tyla. Sign up for that. And we're going to have
information. I'm going to be posting this online today,
00:56:10 -->
00:56:13
as well as on that webinar. We'll talk a little bit more in depth about this.
00:56:14 -->
00:56:22
As far as getting involved with the community, we just launched the campaign through launch good. If
you go to launch good.com slash Corona
00:56:24 -->
00:57:01
you'll see a Muslims unite for Coronavirus relief. And so working together with with celebrate
mercy, Penny appeal, and others in Chatelet, tada, so we can actually get out there and actually
help some of those that are going to fall into financial duress because of this, to help them get
through this and Charlotte's as that's a very easy way for you to contribute and shovel lunch, good
calm, slash grown, and we'll talk about it tomorrow. And, you know, just keep on following through
and Shawn will will, will stay together as we can as much as we can, as a community and
Charlottetown online during these times. So I'll go to the questions. Now. A few of these are very
00:57:01 -->
00:57:20
basic questions. They're they're 50 questions or they're spiritual questions. The first one is very
general. My question is that I feel distant from Islam after I started my PhD in Italy. I'm trying
hard to go back but all the time I face something which destabilizes the level of my faith. I did a
series of feudal bonds ago called the faith revival.
00:57:21 -->
00:57:57
I don't know if someone can post the link. I can't see anything except for the questions right now.
But the faith revival was a series that actually goes through how to keep your faith consistent. So
I didn't want to let that since it was the first question that came in with that question go
unanswered. So the quick answer is that all of us have things that deeply stabilize our faith. Part
of our faith is the fight to constantly retain it, that's part of the action of faith is that we
always have to be on guard with our emotions and to protect them inshallah Tada. So, please do go
together, go to that link, inshallah faith revival. How can we come together to help our communities
00:57:57 -->
00:58:01
through this difficulty when we are advised to be isolated from everyone?
00:58:02 -->
00:58:34
I would, you know, I'm not I'm not going to speak about this from from an expert perspective in
terms of social distancing, and things of that sort. But I think that following best practices from
other organizations that are going out there, they're doing volunteering and things of that sort,
getting involved with those services as much as you can while practicing as much responsibility as
we kind of saw a time and you know, there's some great organizations that are out there I mentioned
Penny appeal, Simon Greenleaf, it currently, you know, here in Dallas models, if I didn't mention
your organization, please don't get upset. Find which organizations are doing national organizations
00:58:34 -->
00:59:06
are doing great things locally, and also connect with your local organizations, you know, or your
messages or whatever it may be inshallah to be productive. In that sense. Is there regarding good
deeds wording, so I'll just answer this question, and I'll move on inshallah regarding good deeds
warding off arm. Isn't life supposed to be ups and downs, despite how much solid and you're out?
That we do? So this is an interesting question, and it's combined with another question, right? So
what do you mean good deeds word of harm, because isn't the point that we do good deeds anyway.
00:59:07 -->
00:59:49
Good Deeds can ward off harm, charity can extend your lifespan. However, the point is, is that we do
good unconditionally for the sake of Allah subhana wa Tada. So sometimes, sometimes, Allah subhanho
wa Taala will test the person in the midst of they're doing good, and that'll be a form of elevating
their station. But we know that you can live long enough to allow us to add a lot does not burden a
soul beyond its scope. So sometimes a hardship can be a blessing or it can be a test, sometimes a,
you know, an aim of blessing, or some ease. I'm sorry, I shouldn't call it an ease can be a blessing
or a test as well. However, the default is that good.
00:59:50 -->
01:00:00
Yields good and bad yields bad, but we have limited dimensions. Okay, so anything that comes to us
as well
01:00:00 -->
01:00:31
Results are doing good is good. And anything that comes to us as a result of our doing bad is bad.
And there's a lot that's outside of our dimension outside of our understanding, however, do good
unconditionally. But one of the rewards of doing good is that it Ward's off harm that you might not
have ever known was headed your way in the first place. And so that's something to keep in mind
there in Chatelet silence. So not ask a question. And I'll just leave it to SATA or najwa, whoever,
whichever, and thank you both for your wonderful presentations, by the way, just like Milan feta.
01:00:33 -->
01:00:52
So I see two questions here, that both kind of go to the same thing, or that speak to the same
thing, which is, I have a great deal of fear. How do I overcome or overpower the paralyzing, you
know, sense of fear, right? I feel like I cannot move right now.
01:00:53 -->
01:01:15
You know, and you spoke about practicality and tips and things of that sort. But you know, another
person says this virus has skyrocketed my anxiousness and I feel overwhelmed by all of this, I truly
feel a loss in control, but I just cannot help myself is a lot angry with me as I don't put my trust
in here. So I'll I'll let both of you choose whoever wants to volunteer to take that one on, go
ahead. And
01:01:19 -->
01:01:21
I'll go ahead and start inshallah.
01:01:22 -->
01:01:32
So I think that these are both really, really good questions, and something that probably resonates
with a lot of people who are listening and who are struggling with this.
01:01:33 -->
01:02:00
I think in the same way, that, you know, this is the everything that's happening with this virus was
bringing up anxiety levels, in the same way that it the other things might bring up anxiety levels,
right. And one of the things that I think is the is one of the most powerful ways to combat that,
there's an activity that I do with a lot of my clients in sessions, where
01:02:01 -->
01:02:49
it's, you, you basically try to actually bring up the anxiety levels instead of tampering them down.
Because a lot of times what happens brain wise is when we avoid, when we try to push when we have
fear or anxiety, we try to push it away, it sends a signal to our mind that, hey, this is a really
dangerous situation, because you keep pushing it away. So that means that whenever it comes up, it's
going to be a huge red flag. And I should avoid it at any cost, right. And so that actually serves
to continue this cycle of anxiety. And, and a lot of anxiety disorders are maintained in this way.
And so one of the really powerful ways to do the opposite is to purposefully not to an overwhelming
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01:03:33
extent, right, but to purposefully allow yourself to feel the anxiety and welcome it in. I know that
sounds so strange, right? It sounds like the absolute opposite of everything that your brain would
want you to do and seems like that as a human being, why would I want myself to feel more anxiety.
But what happens with anxiety is that it goes up to a certain point, if you imagine a graph, and
then it can't stay that high, it just can't, and it starts to gradually go down. And once you
experience that feeling of allowing the anxiety to heighten and then it naturally starting to
dissipate on its own, that discomfort dissipating on its own. It's not as scary anymore. And you can
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01:03:42
actually find this particular, this particular exercise that I'm talking about, it's on a website
called and I see a BM.
01:03:43 -->
01:04:19
It's very long acronym. I can't remember what the name stands for. But they do excellent work. And I
see a BM and it's called Mindfulness for anxiety. And basically, it just encourages you to you read
through the script, and you sit through the anxiety you welcome it in. And then you try and bring it
up again, and you welcome it in. And you're going to notice at some point that you can't bring it up
anymore, that it's going to start to really dissipate. And that is a very empowering experience. So
instead of trying to push the anxiety away, my suggestion is just to sit with it for a little bit.
inshallah, and I'll leave it to you actually has any other input about that.
01:04:26 -->
01:04:59
I don't have too much more to add, but I know one of the one of my personal favorite thing to do is
when I feel overwhelmed with anxiety, and when anxiety does it makes you feel like you have to
figure everything all out at once when you really don't. And so, what one strategy that I really
appreciate is just think when you feel completely paralyzed and immobilized. Just think about the
just the next step, what is the next step that you need to do? And sometimes that just puts you on
the right trajectory to be to getting the ball rolling. So the next step, I just have to get up and
I have to pray to her. That's it.
01:05:00 -->
01:05:09
With it, or I just have to, I didn't drink water all day. And I know that makes more interest, I'm
just going to go and get a drink of water. Once you drink your water, you're like, Okay, well,
01:05:10 -->
01:05:26
I have to send out this email. So you just focus one step at a time, instead of this whole thing of
really what what it is, is putting kind of like the cart before the horse. And of course, you're
going to feel stuck, there's nowhere else to go. So that's kind of my little hack for feeling
overwhelmed.
01:05:30 -->
01:05:31
So
01:05:32 -->
01:05:34
there's an interesting question here.
01:05:35 -->
01:05:53
It's not the first question, but I'm intrigued by it. And I think it's very beneficial. Because I
don't know what this is. So do you recommend the acceptance Commitment Therapy, I feel like it's
helping me a lot in Islam equals accepting a lot a lot in public, I don't know what acceptance
Commitment Therapy is. So
01:05:54 -->
01:05:57
I'll assume that one of you could maybe shed some light on that.
01:06:03 -->
01:06:11
There's so many theories in psychology, and that's one of them that I'm not as familiar with. So I
don't think I could speak to that with knowledge.
01:06:14 -->
01:06:57
So I can talk a little bit about it until and I can I get why this person has brought this up at
this point, because it's really applicable to everything we're discussing. So acceptance and
Commitment Therapy, I guess, like the you would say the foundation of it, is how to accept the
reality of the moment and just move forward with it rather than trying to change it. Right. And I
think that that makes a lot of sense, right now. There's actually a concept, not really, I don't
know if this is a part of acceptance and commitment, therapy, but there's a concept called radical
acceptance, right, which is basically and I know, Sister najwa, has actually written about this. So
01:06:57 -->
01:07:42
she can probably talk even a little bit more about this, this topic, but like the idea of just, you
know, accepting that whatever, it's the exactly like what this person is saying, in terms of
accepting the decree of Allah, tada, and knowing that whatever was meant for you was never going to
miss you. And whatever mystery was never going to was never going to hit you. Right? And, and then
how to roll with the punches, basically. And it's a very, very powerful approach. And I think it's
something that can yield a really strong sense of strength, empowerment and contentment, contentment
being a huge, a huge benefit of it. So that's just a little So actually, the acceptance and
01:07:42 -->
01:07:54
commitment therapy techniques, like if anybody wants to Google that, to help them cope through all
the anxiety of the what's happening with the virus would be would probably offer a lot of a lot of
really great techniques.
01:07:57 -->
01:07:58
Okay, great. I'll take the next one.
01:08:01 -->
01:08:13
Which is, you know, some people say the same, the drives should protect you from the, from the
virus. But if this was true, then surely the Sahaba and Palestine would have
01:08:14 -->
01:08:19
been protected from the illness that was spreading around. So I think this is a reference to the
loss.
01:08:21 -->
01:08:21
plague.
01:08:23 -->
01:08:27
Which which I actually talked about the first plague that I was played with HIPAA Sahaba.
01:08:29 -->
01:08:34
And so if you go to if you go to our website right now, you'll actually find the reference to that.
01:08:36 -->
01:09:07
I think it's important to clarify this from from a creek perspective, from the perspective of your
loved one to walk in on the job, but call upon Allah while you are confidence in the response. That
means that you are confident that Allah subhanaw taala will answer and we'll do what is best with
the response and that Allah is capable of doing all things. Meaning, it's not that you know, and I
think there's, it's a subtlety, but it's a it's an important one. When you call upon a loss of human
time, you say, oh, Allah,
01:09:09 -->
01:09:12
move this mountain in front of me, okay.
01:09:13 -->
01:09:53
And then, like, I'm going to test the loss of animals I have up I have certainty in the draft, okay?
That it's going to happen. The certainty even if I was to do something like that was that a loss of
habitat is capable, and Allah subhanaw taala does hear me and a lot of times I will do what's best
and so my dear, I will not go to waste. My supplication will not go to waste. And so I'm going to be
a woman who said, you know, something very powerful. He said, when I make dua, I don't concern
myself with the job. I don't concern myself with the answer, because it was two feet from Allah. It
was a blessing from the last time that he allowed me to make the draft in the first place and Allah
01:09:53 -->
01:09:59
Subhana Allah would not have given me the trophy, the ability to make the supplication if he didn't
want to answer
01:10:00 -->
01:10:18
And so I focus on the draft itself being able to make the draft and that in and of itself that
supplication in and of itself is a sign that Allah wants to give me something in return for it.
Because as a man, not allow him Allah said, matter, matter,
01:10:19 -->
01:10:54
Paula Berlin and redo and you're clear or something along those lines, I believe that's the exact
statement. But whenever a loss of hundreds and allows your tongue to move with supplication, know
that it's because he wants to give you some. So the certainty that we have when we make these drops
when we do this remembrance is that a lot is certainly capable, and a lot is willing, but Allah will
do what's best in accordance with his infinite knowledge of things that are completely out of my
grasp. And so I'm not worried about that part. I'm just worried about making the rounds and making
the tough cop. And yes, a lot in his power could make it all stop right away.
01:10:55 -->
01:11:35
And Allah subhanaw taala, in his great wisdom, will allow things to proceed as he best sees fit. And
I don't know how exactly my darat is going to impact in all of these different ways, I just know
that it will be responded to and will be impactful in a way that allows these festivals. And so
that's how the Sahaba did not feel like betrayed, like we make them out and we still got hit by a
plague. Instead they focused on Well, if I still got hit with the plague, despite making that draft,
that means that a loss in Canada has a lot of this and the sheriff is LACMA. For me, it was mercy
for me because the answer to this or the results of this Shahada is martyrdom. If I'm patient with
01:11:35 -->
01:11:59
it's an accepting of that decree of Allah subhanaw taala. And that's why you can see that their
mindset was immediately able to shift in accordance with the, with the shifting circumstances,
because they had the complete trust and certainty and Allah subhanaw taala. Throughout all of this,
hold on. I'll just do one more question. And there are a lot of questions, so please forgive us that
we weren't able to get through them.
01:12:01 -->
01:12:15
And this last question, I'd like both of you to speak to a little bit and kind of give your closing
thoughts in Sharla. And for the benefit of the audience, Mashallah sister sada and sister nets, we
just finished the trauma collection at yaqeen. And this was a long, you know, this is a workout of
about two years
01:12:16 -->
01:12:32
of the relationship between trauma and faith, it is highly beneficial, probably the most beneficial
without any offense to all the other authors series that we have as a whole Association. Now, I love
proofs of profit, don't be offended. It's a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful series
01:12:33 -->
01:12:41
of the relationship between faith and anxiety and trauma and how to and how to, you know, understand
that relationship and then be proactive.
01:12:42 -->
01:12:58
So this last question is, can anxiety be good for religiosity? Is anxiety a good thing for my Deen?
And if you could both kind of give your final thoughts inshallah, and then we'll go ahead and we'll
wrap it up, and we'll continue to be in touch with with all of you in Charlottetown.
01:13:04 -->
01:13:08
As soon as What do you want me to get to start it? Okay.
01:13:09 -->
01:13:26
That's, I think that's such a powerful question. Like, just the fact that, you know, you who are
experiencing anxiety could pose that question as to, could it be possible that this could be
beneficial for me in my relationship with Alaska data in any way?
01:13:27 -->
01:14:06
I think that is, I think that just a beautiful question to ask because you're viewing it already
through the lens. Michelle love. Okay, I know, this is incredibly hard for me, I know that these
feelings don't feel good. And there's a huge part of me that would rather get rid of it. But at the
same time, if it's not hard, then it's a testament to that data. So how can I view it in that way,
to help me solidify my, my relationship with him? And to increase my level and his eyes? Right. So I
think it's a very, very powerful question. Mashallah. And you're ready there shifting your mindset?
You know, I definitely hear that.
01:14:07 -->
01:14:55
I think that one way to view this is that any tests that we go through the LS paths that are sent
our way, the goal of it is to determine if we can get closer to him or further away from him, right.
And so anything that pushes us to, to increase in whatever type of worship that we can, or whatever
way we can connect with all this data is inherently good, even if it feels bad, right. And I think
that that's a really powerful thought to keep in mind. Right? So it's, a lot of times when people
are going through difficult times or experiencing struggles, that's when they turn to Allah and when
things get easier, that's when it's so easy to forget. Right? We tend to forget our reliance on all
01:14:55 -->
01:14:59
those parts that are dependent on him. But when we're really struggling is when we really remember
01:15:00 -->
01:15:50
All right. So anxiety can definitely be a means toward increasing our connection with data. And one
thing to just know about any feeling that we experience, there is an underlying reason for it and an
underlying purpose, it's just a signal for us to pay attention, right. And when we pay attention to
what is going on for us mentally, physically, emotionally, then we can kind of delve into what it's
connected to, and then decide how we want to react and respond to it. So it's like the
differentiation between guilt and shame. If we feel guilty, we strive to make a positive change, to
fix whatever situation has led to those feelings, shame. Instead, we view it as there's something
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01:16:09
inherently wrong with me, and I am beyond recompense, like I'm beyond being able to be fixed. And
that will, will push us further away from data. So the same thing can go for anxiety, it can be a
means toward getting closer to the fact that if we, if we choose to view it in that way, which it
sounds like you are with that question,
01:16:11 -->
01:16:12
I'll pass it to the sister Xuan Chung.
01:16:16 -->
01:16:24
Yes, and I completely agree with with sada in that, you know, we create in our lives, we try to have
so much control over
01:16:27 -->
01:16:54
in terms of how we appear in terms of our family in terms are of our environment, we really seek
stability, and we should seek stability, because upon a lot anxiety, stress and anxiety can be a
gift. Because when we are satisfied, then there is no need for growth mode for most people, if you
are satisfied, everything is exactly the way it should be, the average person will just continue on
with their day to day and
01:16:56 -->
01:17:12
anxiety that disables you. I mean, we're not talking about that. But a mild amount of anxiety or
distress, can give you the push to, you know, go back to your credit and reconnect with a lot. It
can give you the push to I'm not satisfied with how my communities dealing with things. So let me go
change it.
01:17:14 -->
01:18:01
And I don't remember who said this, but they were saying that without without, in the absence of
need, there is no growth. So we can look at anxiety and stress as an opportunity for us to look at
what's around us, say handler and be thankful but also say okay, well, these are the things that I
can continue to get better at. So when looked at in the right way, it can be you know, a blessing in
that it can be a motivator and help push us to do good. When there's something that causes anxiety,
we can sit with it. And that's a really, you know, negative feeling. And sometimes we should sit
with it for a little bit. But it's that next action, right if if you get some anxiety about how are
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01:18:29
the elderly people in our community going to get food that's not bad. As long as you don't sit there
for the rest of the day and not do anything about it right when you get mobilized but if you get
that same anxious thought and you're like how do I I'm nervous about these elderly people getting
food. So I'm going to create a whatsapp group and we're going to get everybody together and we're
going to take action. Now you have used your anxiety for to help address the need to help others and
for the growth of yourself and the community.
01:18:34 -->
01:18:45
Alright, so just like Milan Faden, really appreciate both of you against this terror sada system,
Angela for tuning in for everybody, for contributing your thoughts and for everyone for being with
us today.
01:18:46 -->
01:19:27
We pray that Allah subhanaw taala forgive all of us for our shortcomings, purify us through all of
these changing circumstances protect us protect our families, and allow us to grow closer to him in
these times and allow us to do things that are of benefit to the entirety to the entire community
within it time. We will be in touch as I said, please sign up at webinar that you can use to do that
work to get not just the notes with the infographic and follow along infographic which will
summarize what we talked about today and shall tune in to the webinar tomorrow and shout louder with
celebrate mercy and many other esteemed speakers and Sharla and just keep following along and as I
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01:19:43
said we'll keep on trying to put out content that is practical that's beneficial and keep your
brothers and sisters as I mentioned, particularly in Virginia inshallah tada right now. And of
course, those that are vulnerable populations all over the world about philosophy comes
01:19:48 -->
01:19:49
to learn about accounting
