Omar Suleiman – Attaching to Allah, A Dhul Hijjah Series #10 – How Do I Stop Comparing Myself To Others?

			Thinking about the afterlife. I remember one of my friends she asked me this question. And she was
like,
		

			don't you think, you know and show up one day we get to agenda you're gonna be tired of you know,
getting every single thing that you want. I was like that's so interesting
		

			Allahumma Baddeck Liang female was an actor who worked for Lavon Warhammer.
		

			So one of the reasons why we can't see our own blessings is often because we're so focused on what
we think are the people's blessings. Alright, so especially in the social media world,
		

			you see everyone else's best side, and you only see your worst side. Right? Everyone else's life
seems amazing. And they're putting on a show. And all you see are your own hardships. Only their
blessings, only your hardships. Like imagine if they had social media back then. Right? And this
made it is that I'm seeing what's going on with this. How do you see that? You know, this whole
civilization is developing in Palestine. And here I am in a barren desert. You know, but Subhanallah
there's something beautiful about this made it so that and how divine ESL, honestly, when it comes
to them about losing hope and what other people possess or not being connected to what other people
		

			possess is have you ever jealous of sada. You don't see it? You don't see her being jealous of Sal.
You don't see how you're saying, you know, I could have been over there living this life of clamor,
and having, you know, this lineage of Prophethood developing in front of my eyes and civilization
she's pleased was a little lost pantiles decree for her. And Allah tells us about his made it his
Salam o countercyclical white. He was truthful to his promise yet, just thought it was okay. He was
you know, he was teaching his family. This small group of people, tribe of children in the desert
teaching them Prayer and Charity, truthful to his promise with Allah subhanaw taala at no point
		

			Yeah, Allah How come I can't be like as happened yeah, gold and all of those. And liquid Allah
gifted him with
		

			Subhanallah coolness of his eyes, you get to have Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa salam from your
eventual offspring. Alright, so you see the I always look at those those charts of the profits,
right? So you see is hap it has Jaco Valdez, the children of Kobe salmon delineates in the lineage
and lineage. And then you got this made out Islam, this long line that goes to Muhammad Sallallahu,
hadal Hunkeler, the bust of Allah's creation.
		

			But really, I mean, just the idea of how they embraced their role. And sometimes, you have to lose
hope and what other people possess or what you think other people possess prophesized that I'm said,
I'd marry so many of us lose hope and what other people possess, because you might have something
and then you see what someone else has. And then suddenly, what you have is insufficient. You know,
where as if it was just you, if you didn't know even that that blessing exists, you'd be satisfied.
But because you've seen their house, because you've seen their car, because you've seen their
spouse, because you've seen their life, because you've seen all that they're putting forth, suddenly
		

			everything is insufficient for you. And you're constantly after what someone else has, and
especially when it comes to the matters of this dunya in the matters of this world. You know, one of
the sayings from I thought, Rahim, Allah, La you shack at a dinner if you do now, don't compete with
the people of dunya over there. Dunya don't compete with the people of this world over the world.
And so it's recalibrating, as we talked about previously, but it's also reactivating right towards
that pursuits that you really should have pursuing the Ophira. without hating people, or envying
people, or seeing your blessings is very little because you think you're seeing someone else's
		

			blessings as a lot. What do you say to someone who is you're advising someone who's,
		

			you know, thinks that your life is amazing, or your life is great? If you ever sat with someone and
they thought you you were doing well, and you were going through something as well, and they're
complaining to you about life? And it's like, Hey, you just don't know what I'm going through. Every
one of you nodded your head.
		

			It's like, you know, just because I'm not telling you. What I'm going through. Doesn't mean that I'm
not going through something. Right. But you know, is there a moment maybe you can share something
anonymous where like you
		

			You either realized a blessing that you had or someone who you thought had it all, and they didn't
have it. All right, the blessing was wow, like Subhanallah, they're actually going through a lot of
hardship, or someone who didn't appreciate your hardship. I think in this day and age, if the news
and social media are these, you know, people we think well off, and then you realize, so they end up
in jail in prison, or they were doing really illegal, or, you know, how, how miserable their lives
are, you know, substance abuse, in and out of rehab. And, in the end, again, it's what you
mentioned, social media, we see people portray this lifestyle. But the reality is, you know, it's
		

			probably most of the time is different. And everybody goes through hardships, everybody has test
difficulties. And, unfortunately, we, and if once you realize that, you know, whatever you have 100,
that, you know, this is, this is what I have, I don't, I don't care what somebody else's eyes. And
this is what Allah has blessed me with, has blessed me with still, you know, I'll be content with
it, and just do the best that I can with it. But as far as comparing our lifestyle of other people,
or, you know, it's just, it's, it's never ending something so unique about Islam. We're taught to
think about death, often. And it's not in a way for it to scare you or to make you feel sad. But
		

			it's just to remember that at the end of the day, there's another life, and we're all going to be
buried the same whether you're Muslim, non Muslim, rich, poor, you know, whatever it is, we're all
going to be very the same. And thinking about the afterlife, I remember one of my friends, she asked
me this question, and she was like,
		

			don't you think, you know, Inshallah, one day we get to agenda, you're gonna be tired of, you know,
getting every single thing that you want. I was like, That's so interesting. And I thought about it
is like, that's the beauty of, you know, expecting and working for the hereafter. That, that ability
of jealousy or that ability of laziness, they don't exist, because you've already gone through the
test of this dunya.
		

			To experience, you know, the riches and the beauty of two things that you mentioned there that are
very important and often not brought into the discussion on the Prophet saw some said, Remember
frequently, how do we live that the destroyer of pleasures, it's not just the destroyer of your
blessings. It's the fact that that person that you're looking at,
		

			who has billions and billions and billions of dollars, millions and clamor Subhan Allah when they
die, not a single penny can be accessed.
		

			When you think about that, like not a single penny can be accessed. Not a single phone call can be
made.
		

			It's like wait a minute,
		

			I don't care what you build on their grave. Were in the same situation were in the same boat. And
the one amongst us who is greater is the one who has a greater share in the hereafter. So the
redirecting of pursuits Allah knows we have a competitive nature inside of us
		

			well, he that he carefully it's an accident with an axe and the law says compete over that. See,
will be formula who will be Rama T for Be very careful. Yes. Rocco, your own blessings. Say in the
blessing of Allah, the bounty of Allah and His mercy. Let them find joy in that meaning. Instead of
these worldly blessings you have find joy in that but then when it comes to competition, don't stop
competing, compete over the right things and in the right ways. When you compete over that which is
righteous, then you only compete in righteous ways to you're competing for what is the righteous
reward and competing in righteous way so competing with your brothers and sisters you're trying to
		

			get ahead with them you find joy when they get ahead and you want to get ahead to see compete for
good deeds and you love them the way moose it is that um you know, the profits are the greatest
example this Musa Islam saw the owner of the Prophet Muhammad SAW I said, I was like, you know,
subhanAllah this is things I wish I could have had but then he gives him advice on how to grow this
right because let's be real 50 prayers a day or you still become a Muslim 50 prayers a day.
		

			And
		

			then like, hey, how do we break these up? But definitely Yeah, so I mean,
		

			writer spawns
		

			but the fact that Musa is some still gives him an advice the prophets like some advice and tries to
make things easier for us, right and
		

			We have that way for when Brahim is some sees the prophesy some and sees his Alma he's proud give
Salam to the OMA says yeah Muhammad. So I said I'm giving it out to your own. And then he gives us
some some ways to get ahead. Here's some seeds you can plant for Jenna Subhan Allah, Allah, Allah,
Allah, Allah like, like, like Ibrahim Islam told the prophets, I saw them, give us Saddam and tell
us plant some seeds for yourselves in paradise. That's what you should be doing right now. So it's
like, compete, but compete over the right things. And so that's one element that you bring in have
had the one of the that the destroyer of pleasures, that person is not going to have any of this
		

			when they die, we're all going to be in the same boat. And the second element of this is when it
comes to Paradise, and a competition over paradise, that's an open competition. And it's for the
taking. And the beauty of it when we get into paradise May Allah make us from the people genuine,
make it may Allah make us from and for those of Allah, the highest level, we don't have hard
feelings towards each other. That's one. Number two, no matter what level you're in, you think
you're in the highest level. You don't think you don't see people above you having more than you
because that would grieve you.
		

			Which is one of the blessings of paradise, right? Because if you're in paradise and thinking you're
left out and deprived, then it's not really done that for you, right? So Subhan Allah these, these,
these redirects, Allah does not crush our nature. Allah subhana wa Tada redirects it to its most
perfect potential. And that's what this pursuit becomes. So SR SATA, someone says, Look, I know I
should be pleased with what I have. And I know I should be thinking well of what other people have.
But I can't shake this jealousy and envy that I have. I can't stop comparing myself to other people.
What do I do?
		

			Jealousy is one of those natural human emotions. But it's one of the ones that we feel most judged
for, and we judge ourselves most for, and it is one of the ones that can be most detrimental to us,
it can really let lead to a sense of, of dissatisfaction. And it's just a very hard feeling, to to
experience. And one of the reasons why it's so important to work on that that feeling of jealousy
and try to really combat it, is because in essence, when we're jealous, and we have this idea of Why
did Allah Subhana Allah bless her or him with that, and not me.
		

			It can, it can inevitably lead to some doubts, it can lead to us questioning Allah subhanaw taala as
decree LS pans out as wisdom, when we're thinking, that should have been me, but we don't know
better than Allah Subhana Allah, if Allah subhana, Allah chose that person for that blessing, then
that means that that was that's the decree of Allah Subhana Allah and there's some good in that,
whether that's their test, whether that's, you know, there's, there's some sort of good in it for
them. And there's some sort of good in it for us that we were not blessed with it. And when we can
embrace that, it really helps to alleviate any of those doubts or negative feelings that we might
		

			have toward toward ALLAH SubhanA. Donna? And so how can we take that step to really combat that,
that feeling of jealousy? I think one of the most helpful things is to create a mindset shift that
instead of looking at a blessing that somebody has, and think, why them and not me, instead, view it
as an indication that if ALLAH SubhanA, Allah gave it to them, then there's always the possibility
that he can give it to me too. And making dot for that person and you know, the LS path that
increases them and whatever good there is in that for them. And that LS pancetta gives you that as
well. So that it's not or, but it's and it's natural for us to want things that we don't have. That
		

			also Selim describes it beautifully, where he says that, you know, if the son of Adam were to be
given a valley filled with gold, he would want to, you know, and and we all want that we all and
that's actually a quality, that can be beautiful, is that you're always striving for better, you're
always striving for good. So how do we channel that quality to gain good in this life? Is you look
at your circumstance, and you think to yourself, Okay, I'm in this boat? How do I make the most of
it? And if I am dissatisfied, is there something that I can change? Is there something that I can
take control of in this moment, to, to yield something something positive? Is there something that
		

			Ellis Pattana has given me that I can I can do to create a change in my circumstances. And then
also, I think one of the things that's really important is to look at the blessings that you do
have, a lot of times we're always looking at the blessings that other people have, which causes us
to ignore the blessings that we do have, and that's where jealousy can come into the mix and be
really detrimental. So shifting our focus in in terms of that
		

			That can also be really powerful. So go ahead and give a shout out below to someone that you know
who has been doing great work for the community but often goes unrecognized and make sure that you
put a do out for them as well. Does that go low height?