Nouman Ali Khan – Taqwa of Allah and Family

			In today's clip I will be speaking to you about a few reflections just some lessons that we can take
from the opening ayat of surah Nisa, that is the fourth Surah of the Quran in the Muslim order and
an early Surah revealed to the Prophet SAW Selim, when he was in Medina, it's one of the largest
soldiers in the Quran. Also, you will notice that some of the largest soloists in the Quran are also
in the beginning of the most have some things you should know about the larger sutras is that in the
introduction of the larger solos, Allah will mention a few comments, introductory comments. And
those are the most comprehensive, rich comments. They are kind of like, you know, when you go to a
		

			college course and you take an orientation, and your professor kind of sets your mind and your
thought process about what's going to happen in the rest of the semester, sets your expectations
tries to brief you about what take, you know how to navigate the course successfully. That's kind of
what happens in the beginnings of long students. Allah will say a few words, but if you contemplate
those few words, then the rest of the study of that surah and the message of that Surah will become
easy to understand, because you'll have to keep reminding yourself of that opening comment. So the
same thing happens in Al Baqarah. The same thing happens in earlier Imran and now the same thing is
		

			happening here. Just to give you another outside example for example, for instance in earlier Imran
Allah says, For Emelina few Colombia he was able in fact to be Runa Mata Shabbat Hammond, who, if
they are al fitna to have the heart attack really he or Maya Allahu Allah, or Rossi, Hona, filler
anemia coluna Amma Nobuhiko Lumina, India Rabina Amaya Kuru Illa. Alba in the opening comments and
so Talia Moran Allah mentioned people when they come across when Allah says something in the book,
that something in the book Allah deliberately on purpose, he made it very explicitly clear. And some
things he was not as open about it. He left it not completely clarified. Right. He puts into shabu
		

			in it. And then he says that people who have fitna in their hearts, they tried to find some crazy
interpretation for the thing that he did not make explicit appear to test for them. If they've all
fitna of the law, really, they want to create some kind of a new scandal a new fitna out of it a new
interpretation, or they want to be the first to say nobody could figure this out. I'm the one who
just figured this out. They want to lay claim to that. So somebody can make a new YouTube video.
Nobody knows what Olivia memes means all these years. But I my friends have figured it out now.
Right? And he wants to get a million views or whatever. That's that's the goal. So Allah says
		

			Barassi Hona, Villa AMI, and NaVi, the people who have rich richness in their knowledge, they have
faith in it, and they say coolamon and the rabita. All of it is from our master. So what happens
later on in the Surah? is, there's a passage about esala He set up an SR. They said I'm Allah
system, it Nemo fika, Rafi Rocha. Illya. Right, and Jesus and the last part of the life of Jesus is
one of the greatest, you know, debated components of history in the world. What exactly happened to
Jesus, right? And so some, even among the Muslims are going to pick that passage, and then try to
come up with creative interpretations out of that passage, and come up with theories about what
		

			actually happened with ASR days. And that's just an example. If you go back to the opening of the
Surah, Allah said, I will test you with this. I will, I will give you something I won't make
everything explicit. Let's see what you do with it. Right? And the same thing is going to happen in
Surah, Nisa, Allah will mention lots of things in the Surah, but the opening is going to be this
orientation. And in fact, this time, the orientation is just a handful of ayat. And the first of
them is extremely comprehensive in the Sunnah of the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam, we learned that
this is an idea that was also seldom used to encourage and also recite in the Nikka ceremony. So
		

			when people are getting married, this idea would be recited. This was a common practice of the
Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam, yeah, you had Nashotah or unbuckle humanity. So this is an address
to all human beings, not just Muslims. He says, Be be spiritually conscious of your master. Allah
the Halacha culminates in Wahida, the One who created you from a single person wahala come in has
Osa and from out of that person, he created his spouse, meaning he's talking about Adam and her work
salmonella Hema Rowbotham in Houma, Dijon Kathira and through the both of them he spread from both
of them many men, what Nisa and many women what talk hola hola de Tessa Luna be here and be mindful
		

			and spiritually conscious of Allah, in whose name you ask each other for things. Let me explain what
this means briefly in who's a Lolita Luna be in whose name you ask each other for things you know,
and we'll do this lucky have asked me modificado Hodaka was talking about but Karna you know, Billa
teff you know just ice we're just in Allah's name just please stop you know forgot in English we say
For God's sake, can you please do this for me? Right. We have these phrases where we call on Allah's
name and we ask somebody in the in the hoping that their sense of faith to Allah will be enough for
them to do something or stop doing something for Allah stay safe. Please don't
		

			do this anymore. Please don't do that anymore. You know. So this idea that when we get really
desperate from each other, and we really want to beg for something from each other, or really want
somebody to do something that we're asking them for hoping for, we call on Allah, we bring Allah
into the conversation, it happens in Muslim culture, it happens in non Muslim culture, Allah is
making a comment about societies around the world who beseech God when it comes to desperate
requests, and Lolita Aluna V. But then he adds something he adds Well, or Hama, while our Hama, what
the cola what the Quran or Hama, actually, so the Arab of it is be spiritually conscious of Allah,
		

			and also be spiritually conscious of our harm. And I'm not translating that yet. And we'll see in a
second in Allahu cada Alikum MerKiVa, certainly Allah has always been protective, watchful guarding
over you receive actually, in its origin of meanings, it has a few themes, it has the theme of
someone watching over you, someone having authority over you, somebody overseeing you, right,
that's, that's one idea of a theme. Another idea of Rakeem some extract from the word Raka, which
means the back of the neck, right. And, you know, the idea that, you know, shepherds, for example,
can grab the back of the neck of the animal, right and steered away from going off the cliff. So
		

			they're in a sense, the team there have also and hurries also over their animals. This is the name
of Allah that he uses that he calls upon at the end. Notice in this is strangely Allah tells us to
have Taqwa of himself twice. It's the core of bucho humanity have Taqwa of your master. And then
later on what Allah in the same idea have Taqwa of Allah. But the second time he mentions it, he
says, What duckula Lolita, Luna V. While our hammer was something really beautiful about this is the
first time he mentioned having Taqwa of your Rob. He mentioned how He created us from our mother and
our father. The first time he mentioned taqwa, then he mentioned the creation of ourselves through
		

			our mother and our father Adam and how was salam ala Hema, the second time he mentioned that he
mentions the womb. So there's a direct correlation again, Taqwa of Allah and then the womb. But it's
strange that in the Quran, you don't find usually Allah telling us to have Taqwa of anyone other
than himself. You usually find what the koala what the Quran, you know, what Takala is actually the
most common one, right? And here you find what the cooler ham actually by Arab have, be mindful and
be careful and be cautious of the room relationships. The room relationships are Hanrahan is or
Rahim is the plural. The or ham is the plural. It's actually the belly of the Mother, the pregnant
		

			woman, her womb is called a ROM. And why would we be mindful of that Allah is saying all the
relationships that are connected to the womb, you should be mindful of among the opinions of the
scholars on what Aloha means, who does it include? Does it include the obviously it includes the
mother? Obviously, it includes the father, obviously, it includes children, but does it include
anybody else? Actually, there's a trickle effect, which is why the opinion existed even classically,
also mentioned in quote, unquote, to be as his fifth position, his fifth opinion on this is anyone
related to you with any degree of closeness that came by blood, all of those relationships fall
		

			under a lot, hum. Even your cousins can fall under or other harm. In fact, even your wife or your
husband will fall under a lot of harm, because the the I began with Adam and Hawa, Salaam and Alia
Hema, where all of humanity began. And then Allah mentioned that no harm later. So what does that
mean that even the wound could not have happened without the marriage happening, and the children
could not have happened without the spouses spousal relationship happening. So at the source of it
is actually the spousal relationship. Right. And so it has a special place. And it's not to be
excluded from the conversation of LR Han. But today's hotbar I want to focus, myself and all of you
		

			on this strange expression, this unique expression in the Quran, Taqwa of Allah, and Taqwa of Allah
hum. Now, Taqwa of Allah is mentioned hundreds of times in the Quran, hundreds of times. And the
more Allah mentioned something, there's a reason for that. When someone tells you something over and
over again, you might think it's annoying. But Allah does not mention anything except in do
proportion. Everything is in proportion. Allah says well will the Amazon a lot of rollfilm isn't
right. So Allah Allah put down a scale and Allah sent a scale and a scale means everything is in the
right amount, right dosage right proportion, any medication you get more than you need, then you're
		

			going to get a good overdose and you're going to die. You need the right proportions right amount of
pill at the right amount of times. So when Allah mentioned stuck was so much you know what that
means? That is the thing that disappears from my consciousness the most quickest. The thing that I
lose the fastest without even realizing it.
		

			or its concentration, its strength gets weakened without me even thinking about it is Taqwa. And
that's why it has to be talked about more than anything else. So Allah keeps mentioning taqwa and
Taqwa and Taqwa. And so, if we contemplate the Taqwa of Allah, we might learn something about how to
have Taqwa of Allah hum. Because he associated both of them in this IRA. So the Taqwa of Allah,
there's a few things, there's hundreds of things we learn about it. But there's only two or three
things that I'm going to mention to you. And as I mentioned, each one, we're going to see what we
might learn from that from the Taqwa of Allah hub. So the first of them are what I mentioned to you
		

			is small deeds. Were integral Hassan Nubar, if Ha, right Allah says, even if you do something small,
Allah will multiply it, you might not think much of it. But if you become more, more mindful, when
you're making will do your Salah is going to be better. If you just take this little small step,
you're going to notice something your consciousness of Allah has changed. If you start just being
mindful that you're walking into your home with the right foot and you're making a dog, small,
little deep takes you less than five seconds to do that. But it might actually have a multiplied
effect on your consciousness and your awareness of Allah. When you're getting in the car and you're
		

			making dua for travel. Right? I'm assumed offer travel. If, again, 10 seconds or less, you can make
that door. But it's going to be hard for you to start the car and go somewhere Allah doesn't want
you to go. If you made that Doha first, you understand. So small elements of thicker, what do they
do they bring about Taqwa of Allah, small, small things add up. And when you start getting rid of
those small things, one by one, you're like, Oh, that's not fun. I don't have to do it. It's not,
it's not mandatory. I'm not coughing, if I don't do it, fine. You're not coughing, you're not done.
You didn't You didn't sin technically. But you know what you're doing. You're diluting Taqwa. You're
		

			diluting the awareness of Allah, you're not I'm not mentioning him as much anymore. I'm not thinking
about him as much anymore. And when I'm not thinking about him as much, in my conversations, I might
notice that I start talking about people a lot more. Or I notice that I'm using foul language a lot
more. I'm noticing that I'm maybe laughing at others a lot more, I become more cruel, more, I'm
become I become meaner, I'm generous, a lot less. You know, I'm grateful a lot less I contemplate a
lot less. So my the mind is a strange thing, right? The more you the more you make it aware of
something, the more it thinks about kids that are watching TV shows, or, you know, YouTube series,
		

			or whatever day and night are their gaming, they're even gaming in their dreams. And they wake up
Picking up from where they left off. There's a safe point in the on the hard drive or your of your
PS five or Europeans for your switch. And there's a save point in your brain already. And you're
like next time I'm gonna get this boss this will you wake up with that ticker? Right? Because you've
you've programmed yourself with it. So what might we learn from that on the side of Aloha Aloha
means all of our relationships, there are small things that you and I can do in our relationships
that annoy each other, a wife can do very small, little things, every time you see hear her do it or
		

			see her do it, you're like, ah, but you just knew. And you just keep going. Right? And just like
when you don't remember Allah properly, and you don't do the small vicars over time, the heart
starts getting harder and harder. Your the small annoyances that the husband does towards the wife
or the wife does towards the husband. Over time, what does it do, it starts distancing their hearts,
they're still living in the same home, they still fulfill all of their responsibilities. They're
still raising the kids together, they're so all of those things are going on. But emotionally
slowly, but surely, because of small, small things. Like she always laughs at me when he does this.
		

			Or he always says that when I do this, or he's always commenting on this or this, and she doesn't
bring it up. And she doesn't say anything, I'm just gonna have sub, and the Sub Sub Sub Sub
eventually becomes he, I don't like him, he's so annoying. And in fact, when the husband says, Hey,
I'm going on a trip for two days, inside of her heart, she's like, be like, I'm so happy that he's
gone for two days, I don't have to put up with those habits. You know, like there's a, the, the
absence of the loved one should cause distress should cause sadness. But what's happened over time,
because of the small small acts of insensitivity one to the other, the other to the first, that they
		

			actually celebrate being far apart from each other. They're happier when they're not around or the
you know, you're really happy when he's not home. You're like calling your friends you're happy.
You're smiling. And the moment he walks around like home,
		

			and your energy disappears because he's here, right? Or she does the same thing to you, you do the
same thing to her. And you can do this towards your children, small, small things that pull siblings
apart from each other small things that put both parents and children apart from each other. So it's
the first thing that we learned about Taqwa. On the on the spiritual side. Our Taqwa to Allah is
small deeds. When you when you and I become mindful of them, they add up and they start affecting
bigger things. So small thing for example, could be changing your sleeping habits me changing my
sleep.
		

			Eating habits, hey, I, every time I sleep late, I miss Fudger. So I'm going to start sleeping
earlier. I'm going to try to take care of my schedule and make sure that by this time I'm out. I'm
going to put that in my, you know, make that my routine. Now when you do that it has an effect on
your morning. And when you have that effect, you feel different when you caught your budget. You
pray, you prayed on time, it felt good, you got to make dua to Allah, You begged Allah Allah. Don't
let me miss another Fajr again, You Allah give me give me this gift, you make me better and better,
you know. So like these small things they add up in life and in our relationship with Allah. So
		

			that's the first the second thing. Let's take a look a little bit of a bigger step. The Taqwa of
Allah can also be you know, in our, you know, our thoughts. Allah is directly connecting in the
Quran, mindfulness of Allah and spiritual awareness of Allah. He's directly connecting it with the
way that we think I've heard a directory loan, you know, Lala contractor for karoun Why don't you
think? Why did you ponder why did you think deeply? Well, and Allah even says about us, says to us
that there are things we can say that are offensive to Allah, you know, Gabor McDonough and Allah
and to whom Allah Allah moon, you can say things about Allah that you don't know. Um, so there's
		

			thoughts and their speech. So I'll make a quick comment about thoughts and speech. You see, what
happens is, we when we turn to Allah with duck while we make dua to Allah for forgiveness, when we
pray to Allah, we have to be aware of our own mistakes. Right? I have to be aware of my flaws. I
have to be aware of my sins. And I know there's no secrets between me and Allah. Allah knows how
messed up I am. Allah knows all of my failures. Allah knows all of my flaws. I can't pretend in
front of Allah and say, Ya Allah, I'm not that bad. You know, Allah knows exactly how bad and I know
that Allah knows. So I have had an unfiltered conversation with Allah. And I'm very real about
		

			myself. And I don't want Allah to judge me based on one mistake, or based on even 100 mistakes. You
Allah, I know I've made 100 mistakes. You Allah, you know, I made 1000 mistakes. But you know that
in my heart, I want to make a change. You know that in my heart. I'm not I'm going to try my best
never to make those mistakes. Again, you have this. If you truly have taqwa, you have a confession
to Allah. And you don't pass judgment on yourself. You're real about yourself, right? You're real
about yourself. But if you gave up on yourself, think about that for a moment. If you gave up on
yourself and said, You know what, I've made way too many mistakes. I messed up anyway. If you give
		

			up on yourself, then it's impossible for you to have a real conversation with Allah. In fact, you'll
avoid it. What what is the point of me talking to Allah now? What is the point of view praying to
Him now I'm already messed up. There is no there's not like he's gonna forgive me. So even the Taqwa
of Allah and what results from the Taqwa of Allah, the dua to Allah, the prayer to Allah. All of
that cannot happen if I'm not real about myself, and vulnerable before Allah. Now, let's bring that
to our relationships. What happens in our relationship sometimes is, if I made a mistake, if I made
a mistake, that's because I was really mad. Or, you know, you did this, this, this, that's why I
		

			made this mistake, or it's understandable. You know, it just it happened, I messed up, fine, I
messed up, it happened. But if your spouse makes a mistake, if your child makes a mistake, you know,
they always do that. That's how they always are. You're not looking at their mistake, you're looking
at their heart behind the mistake. And you're saying, This person. The reason they spoke like this,
is because they're filled with hate. They're filled with arrogance, they're this way, they're this
way, they're this way. I've already judged them. Their intentions, not their action, I've already
judged their intentions. When it comes to myself, I only want somebody to judge my action. And never
		

			my intention. I messed up. But that wasn't my intention. And you know, it makes it a lot more
innocent. But when somebody else messes up in the relationship, you're the first thing we go after
is their intention. This is who they really are, you know, in law, you have this concept of innocent
until proven guilty, right? So what we often do in our families, is we become so used to the people
in our family, we develop, we don't say it, but it's in our mindset guilty until proven innocent,
actually. So they're already walking around guilt. Whatever comes out of their mouth, you're like, I
knew you were gonna say that. What a surprise. You said that I know exactly how you are. This is the
		

			only thing you can say. And even when they say something good, you assume Something bad must be
behind it. Because you've already assumed that they're guilty all the time. Right? You know what
this does? This makes me unaware of my own self, and I don't want to judge them the way I would
judge myself. Right? And this is the best way to destroy a relationship. By the way, we make the
same assumptions about Allah sometimes, Allah is not going to forgive me. Allah doesn't care about
me. And what does that do? It destroys your taqwa. Just raise your hand if if I want to beg Allah
for my forgiveness. And I see myself even if I made many mistakes if I see myself as someone who's
		

			made those mistakes, but Rick
		

			Read stem and wants to turn back to Allah, I have to see the other the same way, I have to be able
to see them the same way, I cannot use look at someone as a pile of their mistakes. So that's
another thing I have to become mindful of in my relationships. You know, I was I was listening to a
therapist talking about. He's done, you know, 1000s of cases of, you know, people that come to him
for arbitration for therapy, couples that are having a lot of trouble. They're on the verge of
divorce and things like that, right. And he's like, after years and years of his experience, he was
asked to summarize, what do you think is the root like, of the conflict? And when Pete When two
		

			people are heading towards divorce, what seems to be the root problem? Right? Can you point out to
one or two things? One of the things he pointed out, you know what it was that when you look at your
own mistakes, you say it's understandable. And when you look at the other mistakes, you say, that's
how they really are, like you assume them to be guilty. Right? Once you start developing that
mindset, then you're headed towards the end of a relationship, it's going to cut, because you can no
longer give benefit of the doubt anymore. You can't see them as a person anymore. You've already
painted a picture and you won't undo it. Right? So that's another thing we have to become when Allah
		

			says what to kill or harm. What I'm telling trying to tell you is, if we're going to have Taqwa of
the relationships, then that means we have to be mindful of the things that can destroy the
relationship that can separate the hearts and talk well by the ways in the hearts. Right? A toque
Hoonah. Quran says for infidelity come in taqwa and Kulu that is from the taqwa of the hearts. So
this one also has to do with the way we feel towards someone, the way we feel towards Allah, and in
this case, the way we feel towards family members. Right, and those two things go hand in hand. A
third one that's a little bit more sensitive, is actually money matters. Money matters. In our
		

			religion. Money is a big deal. Earning Halal is a big deal. giving zakat is a fundamental pillar.
Not consuming haram money is a big deal. Right? Riba is a big problem, it's a serious thing. So and
stealing is a serious thing. Not giving the widow her share, or not giving the inheritance These are
big crimes. This Allah has elaborated financial crimes in great detail. In fact, Allah has even
talked about bribery, and using your influence to gain advantage in business and things like that or
are corrupting politicians with Kulu Amala combiner Campbell Baldwin, what to do, we have ll hook
CAMI data Kulu for the covenant, Melinda Sybil isn't, right. Well, and don't, don't, don't, don't,
		

			don't give your money to buy influence. So some people can consume the money at the expense of
everyone else. Don't do those kinds of things. So financial corruption is actually a major component
of taqwa, by the way that I had that I just mentioned, about financial, you know, consciousness and
being mindful of not being corrupt with your money is mentioned right after the Ayat of Ramadan. The
month in which we developed taqwa, right after you have Taco fix your money situation, right? Don't
be corrupt with your money. Well, we need to bring the money conversation into the family matters to
if we're going to have Taco Bell or ham. Then it has to be that inheritance disputes are solved by
		

			Allah's book with Taqwa. When you when you get married, you have to take financial responsibility
for your spouse, you know what be mindful minimally him, you cannot, I cannot take ask my wife to
pay the bills. I can't tell my wife to go. If you couldn't support her financially, then you
shouldn't be you know, you shouldn't be in the, you know, taking the Nikka contract on and then
saying, Well, you know, you have to pay your own, or you go to a restaurant, you're like, Well, I
only ate two pieces of chicken. That means I'm paying 1837 ua three pieces of chicken, you pay 2130.
It's not gonna work. That's that duck level or what we might call minimum wildly him. You got to
		

			spend on the kids, you got to spend on your you have to take care of your parents. And what happens
sometimes in this Taqwa is that because a lot of times men are and by the way, men are not the only
ones in this situation. Sometimes women are in a situation where they're earning all the income, you
know, that happens to there are situations like that. And there are sometimes understandable
situations like that, like the daughter of the old man. And in you know, in Meridian, whose
daughters were were basically taking the animals out to graze. So they're the ones making the money
in the house, right? That's in the Quran in certain cases. So situations like that can happen, or
		

			there was a married couple and the husband became disabled and the wife has to do work. And she's
supporting him financially, her the general the Allahu taala, and have supported a suicide and
financially for a time. There are situations like that exist, that are based on mutual
understanding. That's different. That's a separate thing. But outside of that, what I'm trying to
tell you is, I cannot impose a financial obligation that Allah did not impose.
		

			And I cannot make just like in the Taqwa of Allah, I cannot make haram. What Allah has made
		

			Hello. And I cannot make Halal what Allah has made haram the same way in my financial dealings. I
cannot tell my wife, hey, I don't like my mother, I don't like your mother, don't give her a gift to
seed.
		

			I can't do that. Why is she she doesn't have a right to give her mother again. She doesn't have a
right to take care of her cousin who needs a loan or it's her. It's her choice. That's a goodness
that Allah has made that halal for In fact, it's even an active brother. Why would I stop her from
doing that? And the same way she cannot stop the husband, Hey, you said you're gonna give your mom
this. This is why are you gonna give her this this this. Your mom has enough? You know, or your dad
has enough. You know, she can do that to you. And your mother can come along and say I see you're
taking your wife on a vacation. Ha. Don't take me on a vacation.
		

			Your wife has a right? She has a right. And your mom can come and impose her judgments on how you're
going to spend on your spouse, or your children. So you're stuck in the middle. Everybody hates you.
Because whoever you spend on you make somebody else angry. Congratulations on being a man. Right.
		

			But the idea is the idea is that you have to have Taqwa of Allah and that you don't. You're mindful
that you're being fair, in all of your financial dealings and all of your financial
responsibilities, and you're giving people what their rights are. That's actually part of what the
caller has. In fact, early commentators on this is said that this water cooler harm has to do with
inheritance law first, because inheritance laws coming later on. In other words, they understood
Taqwa of the close relationships will have to do with money matters. The ugliest family dispute
happens when the wealthy father dies, and the children are at each other's throats. Or when somebody
		

			dies, and everybody's like, who's gonna get the house, who's gonna get the car, who's gonna get the
land, who's gonna get the farm, who's gonna get this, who's gonna get that, and there's this. People
used to be brothers and hugging each other and either now taking each other to court, for what, for
a goat for a house, or just a patch of land, which you're going to be under it in a little bit. But
you're destroying family ties because of it. So money is yet another thing that we have to be
mindful of in terms of Allah, but also in terms of family. The final thing I'm going to mention is
time is time. Allah has created this the system of Taqwa with him, and it revolves around time.
		

			There are specific times when I'm supposed to pray. There's a specific time when we go to Hajj,
Umrah and Hajj season now, may Allah accept the Hajj of all of the Hajaj, and those of us that
haven't had the desire to go to Hajj that Allah provide you that is to go to Hajj.
		

			So there's a specific time for her. There's a specific time for fasting, there's a specific time for
prayer. There's a specific time for Eid, the entire religion and our Taqwa of Allah. Mindfulness of
Allah is actually about taking advantage of particular times and even voluntary times. There are
special times to make dua, there are special times to make a car well, Mr. very nebulous har, he
noticed beehoon, you know, early mornings, late at night, there there are times times, times and
times, well, if we apply that formula, and what it could mean for our families, then there are times
that we have to give results Isilon used to give a lot of times and spouses, there's, there has to
		

			be dedicated time where people that have a relationship with you feel like they got your individual
attention. If you, for example, have three children, right? And the only time you talk to them is
How was dinner, how school, blah, blah, blah. But you know what, there's a time where it's just you
and your daughter, even if it's 10 minutes, it's just you and her, she got exclusive time from you.
Right, and you made it into a habit, you discipline yourself. This is the time eight is daughter
time, come here. And there's a set time. Like I said before, it could be a small thing, but it was
it could be life changing in the psyche of that child. It could be life changing. It could be that
		

			you're living with your wife, you're living with her for 20 years. But you never actually take time
other than the groceries, the shopping the bill, the kids the commute to this, that the other
somebody's always around, we're always talking about No, no, there's a time we're just going to go
for a walk. Just you and I are just going to go for a walk and we're going to talk this is our time.
No, there's no phone. Everything's on airplane mode. Everything Is Everything else disappears. It's
just you and me. And we're just going to talk we're just gonna take our walk whatever's on our
minds, right? There is that exclusive time what does that do? Just like in our religion, it
		

			strengthens our relationship with Allah right? The daily prayers on their times, the same way if we
can figure out a way to discipline our time with our family members, if they don't have to give them
all day, Allah didn't ask for all day. Even Allah only asked for a few minutes every few hours,
doesn't he? So human beings actually need a lot less even. But that time it's not the
		

			length of it or the shortness of it, it's the quality of it. If you're sitting with your kids
watching a show watching a TV show you that's not quality time. Even though you're present there,
you're not actually talking to them. So you didn't spend time with each other. You both said spend
time with the screen, you understand. So it tacular harm can include a lot of times that can slowly
but surely one drip after another after another in a few months in a year. In some time, you will
notice that relationship becomes a lot healthier. It's a lot easier to protect. So we come back to
the meaning of the word Dukkha Dukkha. Actually, I keep translating it as spiritual consciousness
		

			and protection. We are, we're protective of our relationship with Allah with duckula. Protect
yourselves from hurting the relationship you have with Allah. This is kind of a nuanced translation
of this word. If I lose my Taqwa my feeling towards Allah will get weak. I won't feel anything when
I pray. I won't feel anything when I make dua. No, I won't think about it anymore. I'm just gonna
live my life and I happened to be Muslim. That's, that's the life of a Muslim without any Taqwa
consciousness and awareness, and a protectiveness. I want to protect my feelings towards him. The
same way I want to protect my feelings towards a lot of harm. That's the command Allah has given
		

			what the call or harm in Allah Karna Alikum nativa. And Allah at the end adds that he's always been
watchful over you. He's, he's protecting over you. In other words, this instruction, one way you can
look at this is, this is Allah's way of trying to preach of asking to protect you, guiding you
guiding me, so that we can live a life where both of these things go hand in hand. And I would
finally argue that one of the lessons we can learn from this ayah is the Taqwa of Allah and the
Taqwa of Allah hum are in fact hand in hand. You cannot have Taqwa of Allah and you're not mindful
of the family relationships, one will affect the other. And if your relationships are going bad,
		

			your relationships with Allah will also suffer. These two things have to be connected to each other.
May Allah azza wa jal make us mindful of our of ourselves to him spiritually, and actually consider
that our mindfulness towards our family and our goodness towards our family, and our strengthening
the relationship with our families is also part of our Taqwa of Allah that it strengthens our Taqwa
of Allah.