Convincing Dad
Nouman Ali Khan – Surah Yusuf #13
AI: Summary ©
The speakers discuss various scenes in a story, emphasizing the importance of avoiding false assumptions and avoiding false emotions. They stress the importance of trusting oneself and avoiding double-standing, citing negative language and observation to make people feel like they are not doing enough. The speakers also discuss the power of mind games and the duality of language in relation to emotions. They stress the need for a wolf to eat and the potential loss of respect from people if the wolf aren't able to defend themselves.
AI: Summary ©
salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. Allah wilhemina shaytaan awaji
callooh
malloc Allah.
Allah Yusuf our in Allah hulan lc hoon. I will sail
in Allahu Allah have
Allah in Nila zanoni haboob he will have a hula hoop the
man who was a loon
or Lula in Aquila hood bhuvana roozbeh in
horse Don't
be shy suddenly we're silly Emily waggle Dr. Melissa Nia Coleford hamdu Lillah wa salatu salam ala rasulillah hodeida he was a pH nine. About once again everyone salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. Today, inshallah we're going to talk about is number 11, hopefully, all the way to aisle number 14, that's one scene. And I think that we can cover the lessons in it fairly comprehensively, without compromising anything in shallow dialogue, at least to the best of my understanding. This scene is about it's the story progressing from where we left off last time, meaning the brothers had a conversation among themselves. And they've decided that, you know, the first suggestion is, was
let's just kill yourself and get it over with. And the other said, No, no, no, well, at least let's not kill him, let's put them away somewhere far, we don't have to deal with him anymore. And then one of them came in and said, I've got a better suggestion, fine, we won't kill him, don't kill him. But we can just put him in a well, on the on a road on a traffic road. And it's like a ditch kind of a well, it's not really well built. And if he's just in there, some caravan, eventually, some of some of the passers by are going to run out of water, and they're going to go in there, and maybe they'll pick them up. And that's going to be good enough for us. If you are bent on doing something
* bent on doing something, just do that, and we'll get it over with. And so that's the plan that they've agreed on. And from there, they're now going to try to convince their dad to let him come along. It's clear already, from what we learned before. That said, don't tell this dream to your brothers. That's the last thing we heard dad say. So that already makes it clear that dad's been being protective of use of an jacobellis arm is not just going to let use of go with them anywhere. And so he's being more vigilant because a scheme against them is coming any moment now. Right. So that's being extra precautious. And we've already been given a textual hint for that in the story.
But now what seems to be the case, before we read the next idea, you have to know that in this surah, a lot of the ayah by ayah, you know, references, they're not this happened, then this happened, then this happened, this happened, then a lot happened in between. And then this next is kind of the next major scene. And then there's stuff in between that hasn't been said. And then there's the next major scene. So what's in between that hasn't been said, it seems to be pretty obvious that they didn't try once they tried multiple times to take us forward convinced that, hey, he needs to come along with us. You need to let him learn some of the chores around the house to you
know, he's getting older now he should take some more responsibility. They're trying to come at dad with different ways to try to get use of away from him. So they could do what they were going to do and come up with some story. Right? So and that's not working. And they're just whatever scheme they come up with, that turns it down and says no, he's not going he's not going he's not going. So eventually this pressure keeps building up from them. And they say the following. So they say Fallujah Urbana, they said our father now before we even go further, usually I translate the whole idea and then I kind of go back and go deeper. But I want to know from the beginning help you
understand some of the implications. They didn't just say father, or they didn't just say what's wrong with you Malacca means What's wrong with you? They said our father meaning Come on dad, you're our dad. How do you not trust us? You're our dad. We're family. It's us Come on. Can you just listen to us for once your order to you know, all of that is inside what Yeah, Ivana are dead. You know, the English translation will say they said Our Father, but nobody talks like that. That's the English translation makes it seem emotionally disconnected. But actually, the Arabic is capturing something that I want you to appreciate. Come on dad, your your art head, please. Can you just
listen to us for once, you know, and even though father knows that they've they're going to be scheming something and they're up to no good and he he knows about that. Even attributed Shetlands was was that to them initiate Anna Lillian Senado movie, even though he knows that he's, you know, sometimes when you when you come at someone and pressure them pressure them, somewhere in the back of their head, they start giving you benefit of the doubt. Yes, they do mean harm. But maybe this time, not so much. Maybe this one time they are genuine, maybe I'm too being too judgmental. Maybe I am being over protective. Right. And they want to chip away at that guard that dad has that you
think that we're gonna hurt you so fragile
You think we hate him? Right? We don't. You're our dad, he's our brother, come on, how could we be like that, and they're, they're being convincing to him over and over chipping away at his, you know, his protectiveness, because they're not going to come out and say, by the way, we were thinking of dropping him in a well, so can we have them for a little bit, they're not gonna say that it's so they're going to come out as the opposite of their intention. And this is important because even though the father intellectually in his in his head, he knows that these sons of mine have made up their mind to harm my my young boy use of in some way. And they will be making a scheme we
already talked to you in detail about that before, even though that's the case, they are his sons at the end of the day, right. And you want to have a good opinion of your own family. So even if they're doing no good somewhere in the back of your head, you tell yourself, they can't be all bad. I mean, they can't.
Nobody's that diabolical, that they're telling me that they mean well, and they still mean some harm. Maybe this one time, they do just want to go hang out with him, right. And they're trying to appeal to that one ounce of benefit of the doubt that he has inside him. for them. They're they're trying to provoke that benefit of the doubt, from the very beginning, when they say, Yeah, abana, then there are other ways to convince. So the first way, the tactic they use to convince him is they use the relationship and love, right, and make him feel like you're not being as fatherly to us as you should be by not listening to us. So it's kind of putting, instead of them being on the spot,
it's putting dad on the spot, it's making him feel like I'm not doing enough, or I'm not kind enough to my sons, or I don't pay attention to them, or I'm dismissing their intentions, or I'm too quick to judge them. So he's putting him on the defensive, then they say Malika, that's the next words, they say, what's wrong with you? What's wrong with you. And that's another way of making that whole that they're trying to create a little bigger. Because you know what, what good, manipulative people do in these kinds of situations is they say things that make you feel like not something is wrong with them. But something is wrong with you. Like they flip the script on you here they are doing the
abuse. They're the ones lying. They're the ones scheming. They're the ones denying rights. They're the ones doing the abuse. But when it comes to what they want, they'll present themselves not as the wolves as they are, but as sheep, and then say, Hey, why are you? Why are you being so protective? What's with all the aggression? Will you be so judgmental? I don't understand why you're being like that. And they might even shed what they call crocodile tears, right? crocodile tears, meaning they're looking sad and upset, as if you did something wrong. And you know what happens with people, when they get when they get abused by somebody. And by the way, they call themselves or spa, right?
A tough group. They call themselves that, they get away with that. But when they want to get their way and dad sees them, you're being bullied to my son, or you're being mean, all of a sudden they turn into these mellow, I can't believe you think of us that way. Dad.
I'm What's wrong with you? Why would you even say that about me? And that's like,
you're not a wolf, you're a little kitten. And then the guard drops, doesn't it? So this is a very powerful emotional manipulation, that all of them come together and do and say, what's wrong with you? And this is important, you know, I wonder today as contemplating these ions and studying them and discussing them, which I saw him today. Also, every I told you every detail I mentioned in the story, there's something for us to learn, right. And what we're learning now is these on in one scene, they're ready to kill a boy. And they're scheming and at the very least, they want to leave him in the wilderness. They ruthless they don't care, they have no care or consideration about the
abandonment they're gonna do and the cause the damage they're gonna cause to him or their dad, or they just the evil nature of that act. On the one hand, you see this kind of really villainous face to them. And on the other side, they can put up a face where they're so innocent, and so hurt, that Dad's not trusting me. How could you not let me take use of how could you not? How could you even think this over, so they can put up a pretty good front. And that front works because sometimes they get their way by bullying. Other times they get their way by getting your pity. Right. And those are both very manipulative ways to get the wrong way. But it works for people that are afraid of being
bullies, or people that fear all the time. Maybe I'm being unfair, people that live with a lot of guilt. Right? Now, a lot of times what happens is when you stand up for the right thing, in a relationship, whether it's spousal or parental or children or whoever, when you stand up for the right thing, you're made to feel guilty, like you're doing the wrong thing. Like you're doing something wrong. How could you be so cruel? How could you be so judgmental? How could you draw that line and hurt me so much that you drew this fair line? They're not gonna call it a fair line? They're gonna say What's wrong with you? I thought you loved me. And I thought you loved me is
inside. Yeah. Ivana. And what is wrong with you? How come you're like this, Monica? And then they say La da, da da you so this is a
squeezed by by my lips as I said last month I like that because that's the pronunciation rule in Huff's it's actually a dogma and you can present pronounce it when you're reading even though in the must have in the house must have in the script. We read that midnight usually those of you that are familiar with the read when you put a shadow on the noon you're supposed to extend it a little bit so there would be a lot of
use of the noon is super extended, but here you're not allowed to extend it so it's not that Manila use of it's not that many other use of and that's because it's doing it's it's fusing Obama inside it now you can pronounce it with Obama, that's a correct recitation of it, which is Latin Noona, noona. Allah use of, or you can just make the facial expression of Obama without saying Obama, so that that man Allah use of like that just to make the Dhamma without pronouncing it. That's how it's also done in the Huff's reading. But anyway, the What does it mean? You don't trust us? You don't trust us? What's wrong with you, Dad, you're our Father, you don't trust us with the use of Allah
use of when it comes to you. So now, that's the next tactic. Also, you don't trust us?
us seriously. And now when you do that, when you know, this is a tactic, that's a really good way of making someone take their steps back, even if they're taking the right step. Let me let me show you how this works. It's pretty awesome and manipulative and evil. Don't try this at home. Okay, so someone comes to you and says, Hey, I don't think that, you know, he should go with you.
Seriously, you don't trust me? Wow. You don't trust me? I see. Okay, yeah.
Now, as someone pulls that off, what are you feeling?
Oh, my god. I'm sorry. No, no, it's not that I don't trust you.
No, I didn't mean it like that. Now you you get on the defensive, don't you? Because just just because of the way they said it. So they're actually getting their dad on the defensive. What are you making him question? Wait, should I be trusting them? Maybe they're right. They're so hurt. Obviously. They're so hurt because they've earned my trust, but they haven't earned his trust. And so they say, you don't trust us with you? So if we're in Allahu donostia, who were the ones who mean well, for him? We're the ones who are looking out for him who protects this household? Who brings who raises the sheep so he can drink milk? Who takes care of the outside farm? Who does this? Who
does that? We're not doing that for him. You think we're just we just hate him? Is that what you think? Well, actually, that is what that thinks. But he can't say that now because they put him on the spot like that. He can't make the situation more awkward and they say we're in the hospital. The literal translation is without a doubt and it is especially for him that we mean well knows means to have good good opinion of someone or good intentions for someone to look out for somebody's well being you know, this word was used in the story, interestingly, of it's a parallel I didn't describe when I was describing the parallels of Busan use of masala Sam was trying to escape. And when he was
trying to escape his actual genuine friend told him you need to get out of here. You need to run right? And when he told him to run he said in Neela come in and now say hey, I'm from among those who mean well for you same word. And other thing let him come along with us. We mean well for him. So you've got a contrast between someone who genuinely means well and someone who's claiming to mean well but actually means harm. Right? So here he say that they say that the Father you know in Allah who then obviously we're well wishers for him, he's our little brother. He's our baby. We're gonna take care of him. Like how can you never trust him with us? And then this, trust him with us? trust
him with us to go outside, trust him with us to go to the woods trusted with us to go to work, whatever. You don't trust me. You don't trust us? You don't trust us? You don't trust us. But they say Come on, at least give us one chance. Okay, just one time. So you'll see that this is all in your head. You're just paranoid. So what do they say out of sale? Houma. Anna, let him come with us. Just at least let him come with us. Almost suggesting that tomorrow morning. Can you just let him come just tomorrow? Can you know what fine, don't let him come with us to the farm and to do the work and do everything else. But this one time, we're gonna go, it's gonna be great. We're gonna do
our work. And there's a lot of, you know, fruits to eat there and things to enjoy. So can we have can we let that kid have a little fun, please, instead of just making him think his brothers hate him? Or send him and send him with us tomorrow? yada, yada.
Send him with us tomorrow, so that he may know there's several translations possible here. I'll go with the obvious one first, that's in the house reading that you seen the most have. And that is send them with us tomorrow. He'll eat his fill. He'll enjoy eating food. He's gonna you know he's going to snack on whatever he wants. Raja is used when cows eat. Right. And the idea is, it's used for people when they're grazing like a cow meaning either just chowing things down. He's gonna have so much fun dad work
Going to have hot dogs and barbecue chicken, there's going to be, you know, there's fresh fruits to pick and there's orange juice disregarded the other dad, he's going to go crazy with food, it's going to be so much fun for him, he's gonna love the food, they're, now they're selling it. So they don't just say he's gonna eat, they say yada, he's gonna eat like a cow grazing, like he's gonna stuff his face would be a translation of this ayah let it it's gonna be the time of his life. And on top of that, Well, yeah, but he's gonna play he's gonna get to, he's always here. He's always, you know, sitting around to let him come out and play a little, he needs a little exercise. So now all
of this is them, making a pretty good pitch for why dad should let him go. And we already know that has his reservations. But dad's defenses are starting to come down. Like maybe they do just want to have a picnic this once. Maybe they're not going to do this. I mean, they, if they would have done something, maybe they would have done it by now, they haven't done anything for so long. So maybe they don't feel the same way anymore. Maybe they're having a change of heart. Because you know, don't you want your kids to have a change of heart, if they have spiked towards each other. If all of a sudden one of your kids comes along and says, You know what, that and they give the usually
fighting each other and you get you watch them give each other a hug. And you're like, oh, that felt nice. Because you want that to happen, right? As a parent, you want to see that reality. And they're feeding their dad what they know he wants to see that their brother the brothers are not looking to harm their little baby brother use of, but rather to look out for him and to have him enjoy and to be his actual brothers. That's something that he really wants to see. So he's his guard is at its lowest. And he might he might just let them slip by with this. And they say you have to realize now there are other meanings of your Tarot era based on different parts of it. So one of the killer art
of it is concealer. Mahalo scenario, is this not very well, now that's a different translation. Not that, I would mean, we're gonna do the grazing, we'll take the app because it's not yet tagged with a sukoon. If it's your tag with the sukoon. rata means to eat like an animal like a cow, remember, but if you say no, Terry with a castra, two things change, the UI is pronounced new now. And the end has a castle. If you pronounce it that way. That actually means we're going to go grazing, it's from rye or rah rah to graze animals. So we're gonna go graze the animals, we're gonna go take care of the flock of sheep while he can play. So we're not going to be preoccupied with him. Anyway, we got
work to do that. But I mean, it's a good opportunity for him to come along, and to have some fun. So this this second translation is not he will eat and play, but we'll do the work while he plays. Okay, so that's another kind of case that they made. Another is your theory where you're like, you know what, that I think you should come along with us. Because he will learn how to graze along with us, he'll he'll graze and he'll play, meaning you should learn some of these responsibilities, too. I get that he's little, but he's getting older. And we could use a helping hand, he should come along and pick up these skills like, you know, grazing sheep. And then he can also play. And by the
way, when you talk about grazing sheep, or herding sheep, right, taking a flock out, then obviously for any Shepherd, what's the danger all the time? A wolf. Right. So there's no surprise that a wolf is coming. Right. So from these meetings, you can see why the wolf is connected. Another interpretation of this, this is not that we're not, we're all we're all going to just have a good time eating. And we're all going to play together, not just that he'll play by himself, we'll play with him too, which is now playing on dad's emotions, while you guys are going to sit with him and eat with him. You're going to eat and enjoy watching him eat, and you're going to include him in the
games you play. So he's not just gonna play by himself, you're gonna play with him too. And then they say we're in Allahu Allah Hafiz. And we are, we are the ones that are absolute. We're the ones that truly are his guardians. We're the ones that are going to protect him, which What that means is, when he goes out there, obviously we'll watch over him, we're going to make sure that he stays safe. And they're also saying, by the way, that we're always watching over for him. I don't think you'll see it, but we're always protective of him. And we're gonna be like we always are. So these are two things, we mean well for him, and we're guarding over him, right. Now, here's the fun thing
about these two facts that they made. First of all, they made a really good sales pitch. And they made themselves look, present themselves with the exact opposite intentions of what they carry. Right. And they did a really good job of doing that. But also they spoke about their intentions. They said, We mean well for him, and we're protective of him. Right? And you can do that you can say those things with such emphasis in law who the nasty one in law who the hospital, we're the ones guarding over him. Without a doubt. We're the ones that mean, well for him. You could say it with so much emphasis and emotion. Because all you have is words, your actions go to the contrary. And
here's what happened. Here's what's happening from the dad's point of view. The dad knows you don't mean well for him. The dad knows you're not protective of him, but the passion with which you
Speak, makes him question his own experience makes him question his own experience. And that's what really good manipulative people are good at. Their actions can speak to the contrary, but their words and their tears and the sincerity in their voice and the crack in their sounds, and the drama that they can put together is so convincing that you're like, Yes, I have seen to the contrary, I have seen you do the exact opposite. But I'm willing to erase all of that, from my mind, because of this, you know, Oscar winning performance, you just put up, it even convinced me. I'm convinced that what I saw, I didn't see. I am convinced that I've what I've experienced from you, I have not
experienced because your tears are so amazing. You're, how can that voice be a liar? How can those sounds be lies, you see the power of manipulation, the power of the mind games, emotional games, and that's what they're playing with their father. Now we know the father is wise. But what we're learning also here is you could be as wise as a prophet, but when somebody is playing games, it's very easy to fall into these emotional and psychological traps. Like anybody can be these games are not small. They're very elaborate games. And you can get caught up in them. Even if you're super smart. You could be a psychologist or psychiatrist, it doesn't matter. You can get wrapped up in
psychological games. You can be you can be the smartest person in the world. And you're dealing with someone who doesn't even have didn't even go to third grade, but they know how to play mind games. And they can run circles around you, even though you've been in school for 20 years, doesn't matter. This is not about education or knowledge. This is about the power to emotionally manipulate, and to use the right words in the right circumstances, to get people to feel what you want them to feel, to let get them to drop their guard to shape their you know, they already want their dad to have a certain opinion of them. We talked about that yesterday, right? Now, this is about that kind of
manipulation. So I do believe these ions are very critical. They're not just about going in the park and playing or eating and playing. They're about manipulating a Prophet's emotions, who's already on guard, and yet his guard is dropping down. Now, this becomes, you know, a million times easier for you and me to relate to how many times you might find yourself in a situation where someone is claiming to mean well, while you know better already, you've experienced worse and worse and worse, but their words are the exact opposite of what they're painting.
Every time and then they then you fall for it. And they do it again. And then you're in the same position again, and you're upset. And when you're upset, they'll come to you and say, why aren't you angry like this?
Why are you being so upset?
What you don't realize that I love you? Is that what it is? Is you're upset after everything? And then you try to remind them of what happened or what did you know you you misunderstood all of those things? Clearly, you don't even understand my intentions. Clearly you don't know my heart. And you're gonna hold on to things that didn't even count. And you're like,
you just you get so duped. And eventually, there's two ways out if there's only one way out of that. You're right. I'm sorry. And you start being the one that apologizes. You're the one that goes down. You're the one that drops their guard. What does the father do?
It doesn't say it doesn't say directly. But it seems the father said okay, fine. Just tomorrow. He gave him he didn't say you can be with him all the time. Just for one this one time, which is When? Tomorrow? Yeah. But the moment he said, Okay, I said, Thanks, Dad. You won't regret it. Thanks. And then some of them are like,
and some of them maybe went.
But whatever they did, Dad realize this was not a good thing. I know. I said yes. But I regret it. And you might find yourself in a situation like that. You got emotionally manipulated into saying yes to something, or to carrying on with something that you don't want carried on anymore? And the moment you said, yes, you realize, though I did I stepped in it, didn't I? Here we go again, isn't it? Oh, no. What have I just done? And instead of being happy because you're supposed to be old, things are not going to be that way anymore. Everything is going to be different now. No, you already know better. And the moment you You gave in before anything else has already happened. That
sadness has gone over you. You're already sad because you fell for it again. And even though they haven't let you down already, something in you is telling you it's coming. It's already coming. And you can't believe that you gave in. So look at the words of a Yakuza a Salam is profoundly psychological. He says scholar in nilaya Zuni and hobby he he said it is without a doubt it makes me so truly sad that you're you're taking him away. It makes me so sad that you're taking him away. In other words, that you are taking him away. Doesn't that mean that the decision to take him away has already been done. Right. And you know what the emotion that he expresses is which one sadness,
sadness that you're taking.
taking him away. And then he says, What? A half an yaku. And I'm afraid that the wolf will eat him.
And then he says, The third thing was a man who afternoon, while you are going to be unaware, you're not going to be paying attention to him while a wolf comes in. The wolf comes in eats him. So there are three things here. It makes me sad that you're taking him away. And then the second thing is, I'm afraid that a wolf is going to eat him. So you've got two feelings now sad and afraid. Yes. And in that order, sad and then afraid. Now, if you just do a surface reading of this ayah, and you say, first thing he felt was sad. Second thing he felt was afraid the problem with that is, sadness never happens about something that hasn't happened yet. Sadness, by definition, Arabic definition and
common sense definition. Sadness happens when something's already happened.
Something bad happened and you're sad. You're not sad about what's going to happen next year, you're going to be afraid about what's going to happen next year.
You could be sad that you got a bad grade. But that's after you got the bad grade. But you can be afraid that you're gonna get a bad grade before the test. Right? So before the thing you fear happens, there's fear before there's fear after there's sadness, okay? My mother says, Don't go on the motorcycle, I'm afraid you'll get in an accident. Before he gets on the motorcycle. She has what? fear? If he got into an accident and got hurt. And you know, he's in the hospital and all that stuff. And it's been a few weeks and he's in recovery. What's the mom feeling all that time? sadness. So before the event is fear, after the event is sadness, but this is reversed. He says, I'm
sad that you're taking him away. And then he says, I'm afraid that a wolf will lead him I none of this has happened yet. So they should all be about the future. So the word sad shouldn't even occur, technically, if you're reading it that way. But a lot of what's sad here first, and then you put fear in, by the way in the Quran, you find the reverse sequence most of the time. Now, hopefully, I know him well at home. Yes, I know. You must have read this a bajillion times. There's no fear on them, and they shall not grieve. You heard this phrase before. There's no fear. They won't be sad. Yeah, fear of the future. And when it's all said and done, and they had nothing to fear, they won't
be only looking back and being sad. That's it's logical. Because first is fear, then their sadness. But here is sadness, and then fear. So how do we deconstruct that? Allow them? my reading of this, and I and I felt more confident in that reading of it when I shared it with chick fil a, but he sort of said, Well, I can't believe I didn't see that before. It's so obvious. But hamdulillah Okay, at least I felt it was obvious to myself. And now I have at least one partner in crime. And that is as follows.
Do you know what duality means? Some of you might know what duality means. duality means when someone says one thing, but they mean two things by it.
Right? There's double meaning to what they're saying. Right? So
there's a conversation about or let's take use of can we take him tomorrow, he's gonna play, he's gonna eat food, enjoy himself, he's gonna learn to graze all that conversation. Yeah. And that says, it makes me so sad that you want to take him away.
But he's not just saying you want to take him away tomorrow. He's also saying it makes me so sad that you boys have such a hatred towards your brother, that I'm always worried that you're gonna want to take him with your spite of him, you just want him gone. You want to literally take him away to do away with him actually, the hobby, you can translate as do away with him. It's a phrase used in the Quran in surah, Al Baqarah, you know, walo Sha, Allah who doesn't have to be somebody him? Well, I'm sorry, him. If Allah wanted, he could have done away with their with their eyes, meaning he could have done away with their ability to see to do away with something. So it doesn't just mean
it makes me sad that you're taking him away to the fields, or to the mountains. It also means it makes me sad that you just want to do away with him. He's doing both things at the same time. And that's been a reality, right? He's known that they want to do away with him. And that's what makes him sad that his own brothers want to get rid of him. And he's agreed to let him go tomorrow. But he's that fear that that overarching fear that's always been there. It's not disappeared, that that sadness that how can brothers be like this towards brothers? And that sadness is now going to evolve into fear? Why? Yes, I've always been sad that you had this ill intention of your brother to do away
with him. But you know what I'm really afraid of. I'm afraid that when he goes out there, the wolf will eat him. Now, what in the world are we doing with the wolf? It should be a wolf, or some wolf. Right? though, it could be assumptions, which could mean a pack of wolves will eat him. That could mean that could be the meaning to but here's a few things shepherds back in the day. When you have shepherds, they know which areas are more than dangerous for the attack of a wolf. And it's not hundreds of wolves. It's a small pack or a lone wolf or whatever. And they may be knocked a tooth or one or two teeth or hit him in the eye or something with a slingshot or bow arrow or a stick or
something before so they know the wolf that causes trouble. The it's an
own entity. It's not like some unseen creature from before. These are people that love live out in the wilderness. So they've seen that wolf before you see what I'm saying? So they know. So he's the maybe one reading is the maybe a notorious wolf in the area that's been known to nab sheep or whatever. And he's attacked small children too, because wolves don't attack humans unless they're smaller prey. Right? So that's maybe one reading of it, and he's afraid that the wolf will eat him. But I still hold the view that just like the first thing, he said, had duality, two meanings. I it's making me sad that you're taking him tomorrow. But more importantly, it makes me sad that you just
want to do away with him all this time. This like that. The second fear also has two meanings. And it could mean that he's calling them wolves.
That the wolf or there's a wolf inside you, meaning that the whisper of the devil can be so strong that what does the wolf want to do? It wants to devour a prey that can't defend itself. You know that right? wolves don't go after animals that can defend themselves. Wolves go after animals that cannot defend themselves. Wolves when they when they hunt up, you know, a pack of gazelles or whatever else, they they'll have one circling around or running after them to keep an eye on which one's the slowest one or the oldest one.
Like, they'll find the weak link. And then they'll let the rest run away and go after that week when and then pounce on him. Do you see a parallel? You see a connection with what's happening here, a child who can't defend himself, easily pounced on, you know, and the obviously wolves prefer easy prey, which has smaller size prey because it can't run away, and it's easy to kill. And it's not as muscular big that it can kick them off. So children used to be easy, even though they don't like to hunt human beings or attack humans. The humans can become prey if they're smaller sized. Right? But the imagery here is as if you're not already one of them, or more had suggested kill yourself.
Kill the child. Right? And he's like, maybe some of you have that intention. Maybe you have a wolf inside you, that is going to consume him and maybe the wolf could be an allegorical reference to the devil, because the devil is the ultimate enemy. Initiate honor, Lillian, Sania, do we? And you know how, you know he there's this imagery of shepherd and sheep and the attack of the wolf and all of that you're claiming to be shepherds. But you're actually the the wolf. You know, and I'm afraid of that. But he wouldn't come out and say to them, I'm afraid that you're the wolves that are going to eat him that are going to kill him. He's speaking in indirect terms. Now the question arises, why is
he speaking in indirect terms, he's speaking in indirect terms, because clearly, they are going to become ultra aggressive. And they might, if they're called out in this way, they might not have to hide behind the entire drama have, we mean well, for him, or this and that, they'd be like, you know what, forget it, I'm done pretending I'm going to kill him right now.
Because then there's that psychotic he sees it. So he's afraid now to speak so directly to them, that the crazy might really come out. And so he's speaking in imagery terms, it makes me sad that you want to do away with him, or that you are to do away with him, or, or in the more immediate sense, take him away. And I'm afraid that the wolf will eat him. Clearly, if this was the fear, he would have said it before. But now he's speaking in both terms, and then we get to the final phrase, will enter man who half alone, while you are unaware of him. So the picture he's painting is, you guys are going to be busy grazing sheep, he's going to be by himself eating a wolf will see him
alone, and attack him and you guys will be too busy. And he'll just get devoured, right? Well, tomorrow afternoon, and you won't be paying attention to him, or you won't, you'll be unaware of who he is or who he is, or what he's doing. But the second meaning the duality in the text, so beautiful. The wolf might eat him, while you've never realized who he really is.
To be lawful of someone, you're unaware of who they are. And it's as if he's saying you have so much spite for your brother, you want to do away with him, you're even you might even be willing to kill him and all of this, you know why? Because you don't really know who he is, do you? You just hate him. And that's all, all the all you need to know is you hate him. You just think he's the problem. And that's all you need to know. You don't need to know to get to know him better. You don't need to understand who he is, you can remain with offi love him. And that makes your hatred easy, you can be unaware of him. And that makes your hatred easy of him. So there's that duality in the text here
too. And that tilt teaches us something very powerful. It teaches us that people that we develop hatred towards it's becomes easier when we don't get to give ourselves a chance to get to know them better.
We don't it gives us it's a better opportunity for us to maintain that hate if we don't communicate with them directly. Or don't give them a chance so long as we can be blissfully unaware of what they are. Because, you know, we like to reduce people to a mistake, or we like to reduce people to our opinion of them. There's they can be no more to this person than my opinion of them. Everything else I would like to be lawful of that will justify my hate of them. And that's kind of almost implied inside of the
texts were jacobellis. I'm saying, it makes me so sad that you're going to do this. And the wolf might eat him while you're unaware. While you while you're entirely unaware of him, are you and he's also in a sense, saying you don't realize who your brother really is. Now they're going to respond. And this is what I'm going to end with today. Their response, this is number 14, they make this claim. They say palu ln Allahu wa neurospora.
I love this language. It makes me cry and tear up at the same time they say,
seriously, if the wolf we're going to eat him while we're the band, where the gang?
Which means on the surface, what is it? What are they saying? How can a wolf eat him when there's so many of us? Both will run away? But ironically, the the irony in the language is why do you need a wolf to eat and we're here?
Why do you need to or even if the wolf will eat him, while we're around to do this job, who needs a wolf didn't even realize what they just said?
Nine o'clock.
But anyway, that's not their intention to say, but it kind of a slip of the tongue, almost you could say. But anyway, so they say if the wolf will eat him, while we're the gang, we're we're a tight band in the house, you don't we in that case would be ultimate losers. Now, this also means a few things, we would be ultimate losers. What are they saying we swear we'd be losers, what one people would say about us, these brothers that are supposed to be shepherds and fight off wolves couldn't even defend their little brother, we're gonna lose our reputation. If that happens dead, people are going to consider us losers. And we're not going to get further contracts degrees other people,
sheep, people are going to say you're going to take care of my sheep, you couldn't even take care of your brother, we're gonna lose our reputation. So by the way, reputation mattered to them before, right. So that's one meaning of it, neither lacasa alone. Another meaning of it is that seriously, if we weren't able to defend him, while the wall, this is how many we are, and we couldn't fight off the wolf, then we would have been bankrupt A long time ago, we would have been losers already. Because all the sheep that we have, and all the great things that we have is because we are able to fight off wolves dad. So obviously, we can defend him. And then they're also saying that another
meaning of it is, if we weren't able to defend him against if the wolf did eat him while we're around, and we're such a big bet, obviously, we will lose respect in your eyes, dad, we will lose you.
We are the ultimate loss. And we will be such losers, even in your eyes and your what you think of us matters to us. You know what's crazy? That is true. What do you think of them matters. But I want you to understand the complex psychological game that's being played. Dad, if we did that I know how hurt you would be, and how you would never look at this the same way again, we would never do that. That's what they're telling him to convince him while what's going on in their head is actually that's exactly what we're going to do. And then we're going to say Remember, we said we would never do that on purpose. So clearly, we didn't do that on purpose. What an alibi.
What an alibi, like, how could we ever do that? That would be the worst thing, because then you're not gonna love us like you? We hope you would. And so definitely, yeah, you're right. You don't want that. We do. But we don't. But we do. And we want to convince you that we don't. But we do.
So psychotic, in either law. So what we're learning in this ayah is the elaborate, emphatic, passionate way in which a liar can lie.
liars can be very passionate, angry, like, offended that you question their intentions. And they can make you feel like you should question your own existence. They're so good at it. They're so
emboldened by what they're saying. They say,
Are you serious law in economics?
Truly, if if the wolf were to eat healthy, and we're small, we're a band of brothers.
If that ever happened, I swear we would be the worst losers of all dead. How could you even think this of us? There's no way that's ever gonna happen. And there's no way we could have survived as a household. There's no way we would let ourselves fall in your eyes. And we're not going to lose our reputation in front of people, if that's the case. And it also finally means we're real losers, we deserve nothing. If you did that, if we did that, then we have no, no business, protecting sheep or doing any other work, because we're just no good for nothing. We are good for nothing. And that this is, by the way,
them saying that we are clearly we're good for something, and that I don't know why you think we're good for nothing.
You know, we're not useless, you know, we know what we're doing. And so that's the, you know, their response to their father to justify taking use of racism. Now, you know, in a surface reading, you might be left with the question, how could use jacobellis Allen let his son go when he knew that they're going to scheme. I hope I tried to explain to you today how emotional manipulation and
psychological manipulation can be pretty devastating. And you could know better and still fall into it. That's the wild thing about it, you could know better, but people are good enough to mess with your head to mess with your emotions and get you to slip from your resolve and make choices or have them do things their way that are going to end up harming everybody. And this is this is the willpower. That is it's so difficult to hold on to, especially if there's nine of them 10, you know, 10 of them, and they're ganged up, you know, nine of them actually ganged up, and he's just one man, and Instagram, and they're constantly making the same case to him, badgering him over and over
again, this isn't one conversation, what we're seeing in the IR is the culmination the climax of maybe weeks of conversation. Maybe this is going on for a while before finally dad caved in a little and said, no, no. They mean, well, like maybe they even said we need to play the long game here, guys. We need to show that that we love you, sir. Because he's not going to let him go like that. So we need to start being nice for a while. So his guard goes down because we're, we're in it for the long haul. This is a chess game for us. And eventually, one of his guards will slip one, there'll be some * in the armor. And that's how we're going to slip in. That's exactly what the devil does,
isn't it for the lahoma Bureau. He seduces people. And he deludes people with a little deception at a time, one little bit at a time, so they know that they have to play the long game, their dad's too smart otherwise. And that's what you might find yourselves in Alaska to protect us from emotional manipulation, and not make us of those who engage in such a thing and catch ourselves if we are doing such a thing. barakallahu li walakum filicudi Anil Hakeem. Whenever anyone here can be it with a game or cinematic camera to live in a castle.
It's gonna break