Getting Rid of the Problem
Nouman Ali Khan – Surah Yusuf #12
AI: Summary ©
The conversation between two brothers discusses the use of cutting off a crowd and the potential consequences of it, including negative consequences and the loss of family relationships. They stress the importance of avoiding comparison and being true to oneself, and discuss the use of "will" to protect against predators and chaos. They also touch on the concept of " firstly taking action" and its potential consequences, including loss of family relationships and chaos.
AI: Transcript ©
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movie Coco tolu sofa with Rocco buying Lola como bien calm water coo me min D komen slowly he called ACO min homelet okoto usofa Elko houfy Hoya bataillon job held Taco Bell both sejati in tune don't really rubbish, silly. Emily looked at me lasagna coli for hamdulillah salat wa salam O Allah, Allah Allah Allah He was happy Ah, man I'm a bad salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. Everybody. Today, inshallah I'm going to try to cover some lessons from is number nine and 10. of producers. This is the conversation continued, of what their brothers said among each other. So the conversation seems to be progressing. What I recited to you was actually from earlier on from set
from eight, and then nine,
and then all in all the way down. But today, we're just going to do in Sharla, nine and 10 are actually 789 10 is what I recited to you. But anyway, so the first thing, as I remind you from yesterday, they felt that dad loves Yusuf and his brother more, and they separate themselves from him, and even considered diet confused and lost. Now things are escalating, and they've gotten to the point where they say to Lucifer with Rahu, rather than kill yourself, or throw him far away thought in Arabic actually means a mechanic buried to faraway places called a Torah. So Torah as a verb means to throw something or to cast something off in a far distant away place. Now, who would
have meant by itself if the Arabic said it or who I could have translated this as kill use of and throw our cast him off to a faraway place, but the Arabic is it Lahu other than the cast him away to a foreign place, and then the word out, which means land, is used and the word land was in the infinitive form, you know, the indefinite form rather, which is the natural form in Arabic, what that means is cast them away somewhere far that we don't know about what that place is, at some unknown, Uncharted kind of location, a place that's not familiar to him or even to us, so that there's no way he can make his way back, because basically what they're trying to say. So the two
suggestions, so far pretty extreme, is kill us off, and cast him off to a faraway, unknown Uncharted kind of place. Now, before we read the rest of this ayah, what's important is to ask the question, who's saying this? Right? Like, who's because there's a bunch of them talking? Is this one of them saying it is all of them saying it, the way the Quran has captured this conversation is, it seems it's captured the essence of this conversation, there's a lot they have to say. And what they had to say did not happen over the course of 10 or 20 seconds, when you're reciting these IOD dad loves him more, kill him and throw him to a far off land, you can be done reciting these out in 20 seconds.
But this kind of conversation that happened between brothers did not last 20 seconds, it was like an hour long, or two hours long. They were ranting and venting about how much they hate us over how dad isn't fair and all of that other stuff was going on. So what the Quran is doing is it's taking the summary of everything that they said that, essentially the ideas that were being passed around other than the hot air that was being blown. The the fundamental ideas that were being proposed are being captured inside of this conversation. So it doesn't have to be that one person said this, it could be that one person said let's kill him. And so he's like, yeah, you know what? Yeah, no, that's
crazy. Don't kill him. Let's just get rid of him. Let's put them somewhere far away. And so there's multiple voices being heard in this, you know, isolated echo chamber. And the the the most vile ideas are the ones that are actually on the table are now being discussed. And so that's what's being captured inside of this ayah when Allah captures it by saying, kill yourself, kill him, why don't you just get rid of him? and killing him means that they're gonna have blood on their own hands, right? Okay, fine. Even if we don't kill him, can we just take him somewhere far away from here, so we don't have to deal with him anymore. This is their way of dealing with the problem. Now
the first thing that we we learn from this for ourselves because again, every time we learn something in the story, we have to take it back to what do we learn for it for ourselves, when someone develops a grudge and when someone develops this, you know, kind of twisted mentality that I'm not being treated fairly because of this part. They make me look bad. You know, it's kind of like in school, when you're getting bad grades and
One kid keeps getting 100 or keeps getting an A, when he walks in, you're like, I hope he falls down the stairs today, like he's making you look bad because he gets the a, or a sibling of yours that does better than you do. Every time they get a hug from mom or dad or they get a sticker or they get an award, you're like you're trying to trip them over on their shoes or something because it's burning you. Right? So they have identified use of as the problem use have never done anything to them. But he's making them look bad as their way of looking at it. And so in their mind, if we got rid of him, we wouldn't look so bad. And even if use of hasn't done anything for him, I hate him so
much. He's so annoying. He's so annoying. And sometimes kids will say things like that. I don't like you're so annoying. Why am I so annoying? I don't know, cuz that's always unfair. He's always taking your side, when you would you just said had nothing to do with him. It has to do with dad. Right. But this is the object of your anger become someone who has nothing who's done nothing to deserve your anger. And you might be the recipient of that from somebody else. They've just developed this spike towards you, for nothing you've done for absolutely nothing you've done. And this is kind of the nature of jealousy, it can make its way into, you know, sibling relationships, or family
relationships, but other kinds of human relationships, too. I've seen it all kinds of weird places, like even in, you know, supposedly religious, spiritual circles. Why is why is this guy getting the invitation to speak at the mainstage? And I'm getting like the morning 11am session, not even the main conference session? What qualifications does he have?
Like, you're feeling like you're being undercut by somebody else, they didn't do anything to you, they just got an invitation and came and spoke. Right? I've been in situations like that, where somebody is upset that they didn't get the final speech, because there's like four speakers in a row. And they didn't get the final speech, because that's supposed to be the climax, the keynote speaker, they didn't get that spot. So there, they have some things to say about the first three speakers who's never the guy who's never met them. He's never known anything about them. But he's got something to say about them. Because they apparently, you know, somebody else is taking that
final spot that he should have taken, or something like that. So what I'm seeing is this kind of mentality where you think that somebody else getting the spotlight, somebody else reaching success, somebody else accomplishing something, is somehow taking something away from you. So therefore, they're the problem. If you just got rid of them, then people would come and give you another silly example, to get this mentality. Because it's, it's pervasive, it's not limited to this story. It's this, it's this thought process that the devil wants to spread, you know, worldwide, you've got like, from New York originally. So I'll give the pizza example. And I also had an interview today
with a group of guys in New York, so so you got a pizza place, and it's terrible pizza. I mean, your pizza tastes about as good as cardboard. And down the block, there's another pizza place and they sell amazing pizza. And there are lines outside, there are people just buying it up. From the moment they opened to the time they closed, they got customers lined up, you're not getting much business, because even when people come to you, after that, they go from you, they go to the doctor. So therefore they don't come back to you for more pizza for you. And in your mind, instead of saying we need to improve our ingredients, maybe we should actually hire a chef, etc. You're thinking if that
store didn't exist in this neighborhood, we'd get business. Somehow them getting all that business is the reason we're not succeeding. So you're trying to figure out a way to burn that store down, or the thought crosses your mind, or you're trying to sue them for something, or you're trying to, you know, you know, take by a slice of their pizza and put a plastic bug on it and put it on social media and say I found an insect in their pizza, don't eat here, trying to discredit them in some way. In other words, you think harming them will be of benefit to you, because they're the problem. You can't see yourself as the problem. And they this can become so extreme, that even inside of a
family of thought so wild as killing your own brother, even if he's not a brother, killing a child,
killing a child is being tossed around and suggested, because when that kind of mentality takes hold, you develop your own sense of right and wrong and the actual moral compass that Allah has given disappears. So as to Lucifer, kill yourself. The first, the first extreme will be, I will be better off if I cause this person some kind of harm. Right? And the most extreme harm example is being given in the Quran. And that's to kill to kill use of the point that I'm trying to make is the Quran will give us extreme scenarios. But that doesn't mean unless that extreme scenario exists. We don't have the same problem. We may not wish or we may not know of a situation where we want to kill
somebody, but so long as you want to cause them some kind of harm. It's the same mentality at play. But what's the second solution? Okay, fine. We won't kill him. We're not going to murder him. Because, you know, after all, he's a kid. But I'm so mad. We should do something.
Well wait, why don't we just get rid of him? Wait, why do we have to see his face? Why can't we just take him away somewhere, so we don't have to deal with him ever. So now the second is, well, I can't hurt them, and I can't kill them physically. While the second is maybe if there was a way to get rid of them from my life in some way to, to put them in a situation where I never have to see them or deal with them ever again, to conspire and to scheme to get rid of someone to put to put them in a faraway place or, you know, to get them kicked out of the house, in some cases, you know, or to get them deported. Or to get them falsely accused. So they are not in your life anymore, they're taken
away, or get other people to look at them in the wrong way to slander them in some way. So they are far away from this circle that I want to own and, and and be the king of etc, right? This, this is the second kind of mentality at the Okay, fine, I won't hurt them. But I just wish that they disappear somehow. I wish they just go away somehow and not be around me. I don't have to deal with them. So it Rahu can take him far off to any any Uncharted place. And by the way, the second suggestion in the context of the story isn't much better than the first one. Because if you take a child out into the wilderness, where nobody knows where this is, out in the boonies, you know, and
you leave the child there, what's going to happen, either a human predator, or an animal predator is going to get to them, or they will know how to survive, and they'll die. So for all for all practical purposes, you're killing them killing him by your own hand, or you're letting the environment you know, and the elements kill the child. That's basically what it is. But essentially, it's the same suggestion. It's not really one that much better than the other, but one at least makes them feel like at least I didn't kill him. I mean, we just left them there. So this is rationalization. Okay, we won't be that bad. But this is not as bad. But practically speaking is
just as bad is just as bad. It's not any better, except that it gives you a false sense of, Oh, we didn't do something as terrible. Right. So those are the two suggestions that are being floated. But then comes the real kick in this idea. Like, why are they suggesting this? What's the point? The point they make is two things. They say yuck Lula como abiko. Now, this is a hard phrase to translate. And there are a few implications of it. So I'm going to go through a few of those implications. Hallelujah. Blue in Arabic means to become Exclusive OR soul. Okay? For something to be alone, like, there's a famous Hadith about halwa of solitude, or the Quran uses the phrase, what
is the holla bar boom Illa Berlin when they are alone with each other. So solitude or being alone has to do with the idea of halwa now they say your hula comb, wedge will become your father's face will become exclusive. For you, that's a literal translation, you'll get rid of him, throw him either kill him or take him in some faraway place where he can't make his way back. And if you do so, then your father's flip face will become only for you. That's a poor English translation. But that's literally what it says your father's face will be only for you now what in the world does that mean? That your father's face will become extremely exclusive just for you. The first thing it
means is well if he's not constantly listening to you, so for complimenting him or making dua for him and around the house because you know they were working outside the use of his in the house because he's young right? Well, he's got nobody to give that kind of attention to anymore does it does he so the only the only place he can give attention to now is us so the one who always gets his attention and we can't ever feel like we have any value is gone. So now we finally get to be the sole recipients of his attention. What can also be an expression for love? When you turn to your when your face when you when your face is turned towards someone, then they you're pleased with them
and you have love towards them? You know? So you have in the Quran for example. Would you who Yama even now there are a lot of behind now there are actually in the Quran. You know, Allah says what hola in order to aloof uttama, which hola facing Allah or the face of a live de la la, the pursuit of Allah His face. In Arabic expression pursuing someone's face means pursuing their smile, pursuing their love. So they're also saying, Get rid of him, and your dad will see that he did. We deserve the kind of love He hasn't been giving us because he's too confused and distracted, giving that love undeservedly to use of. So as if they're saying, dad doesn't understand his own feelings. He's so
confused, and that's why he loves you so much. But once we get rid of use of dad's gonna be like, I still have so much left to give. I don't know what I should do with all of it. Oh, well, at least you boys are still here. Come here. Let me give you a hug.
As if they can control the feelings of their father. They can control what love works like love is to them like a faucet. If you block this passageway, it'll go this other way. Right. And this is again, a part of twisted thinking you think that you can control
what someone else feels what someone else loves. And if they love one thing, if you get rid of that for them, they'll just find something else to love. Right? And this is a pretty, you know, irrational, crazy way of thinking. But when people become obsessive like that, and irrational like that, that they can start thinking crazy thoughts like that. But in a lesser sense, maybe you're not in a crazy situation in your life, but in a lesser sense, what happens in a lot of toxic relationships, is a person is trying to control the feelings of another person. They're trying to control how they feel, why don't you love me the way I need you to? Why don't you? Or if you're
angry, why aren't you angry the way I am? I need him to be angry the way I am. I need her to love me the way I want her to. I need them to I want to control their feelings. And their thinking that they need to take this step in order to guide and redirect their father's feelings. So that's one of the implications another is the sole attention well we've got he's got no one else to pay attention to whether he likes it or not, it's going to be that's all that's all I've got now is these boys. So I better make the most of them. So he'll appreciate this more that way. The other meaning of color is to empty out right? Not just to be exclusive but to empty out or to have left and what that suggests
is father's face is so full of joy when he looks at use of there's such a happiness on his face. There's so much contentment on his face you can see it in his eyes the the you know the calm he feels when he's around us. And if we get rid of him that look on his face that he has all the time when he sees you so is going to empty out of him
is going to empty and there it's only when that feeling of dad that he's always expressing with his the joy on his face for use of only when that's emptied out, will he be there for you. So long as Yusuf is there, he can't really be the loving Dad You need him to be Yusef is the problem actually. Right. So yes, Lu loco module a be calm is that His love will wear off for you serve and that face will change. And then finally that face gets to be for you. And also it means from the exclusivity point of view, there is no more comparison. He because they feel like they're being compared right from the conversation even started with a hub boo Illa Amina Amina use of his brothers, brother are
more Beloved, or more loved by dad, then we buy then we are we were less lovable to him? Well, there's no one to compare to now. So it's only us. So the if we get rid of him, then the problem of comparison will go away. And this is comparison is a very evil thing. People live their entire life in comparison. You know, they compare themselves to a sibling who accomplished more, or a cousin who got a better job or, you know, they compare themselves. Sometimes they live in their parents shoes, you know, in their shadow, my dad became a doctor, I didn't get to become a doctor. And they're constantly comparing themselves to the family name, right. And sometimes inside of a family, people
are constantly comparing you whether you want to compare yourself or not. So you've been trained from early ages to compare yourself. And your value only comes from comparison. So if you got to go to college and graduated or something like that, and somebody else in your, in your family, a sibling or whoever, maybe they didn't get a degree as high as yours, or they didn't get a job as high as yours, then somehow you are you have more value in the eyes of your parents, right, because these accomplishments make you more valuable of a child. Right. And this is the same thing in social circles and other things. In other words, value in our mind, our my value as a person comes from how
I compare to others in terms of my paycheck to others in terms of the kind of job I have, you know, the kind of prestige, I have the kind of car I drive, the kind of clothes I'm wearing, it's not even, I'm not even wearing the clothes that I like to wear for a lot of people, they're gonna wear the clothes that are gonna compare to other people. Right, so they every decision they make is rooted in comparison. It's not even about their own personal preference. And to the point where, you know, our kids get so bullied at school, that even down to the decision of buying a backpack, you know, or wearing a hat or something silly. The first thought in their mind is who's gonna make fun
of me, if I wear this, who's gonna think that I'm cheap, if I wear this, like they're comparing already in their head, in order to make that decision. It's not even about themselves anymore. And that that's the kind of slavery because you're not making free choices anymore. Your choices are dictated by this master culture that wants you to compare first. And that comparison will dictate what choices you will make, what what in what way you will speak, what actions you will take, and this comparison in that's in a culture setting. And in a family setting. These comparisons can drive people insane. They can make you do things just because just out of the need to compare to somebody
else. How much how much diseases in our cultures around the world. How many terrible decisions do we make? Because if we don't make them, what are people going to say? How are we going to compare to xy and z, financial decisions, family decisions, religious decisions, sometimes
times big just because of comparison. And here they are saying, we're going to do this horrible, horrible thing. So that there's nobody to compare to, we're going to start looking good. And so the end, which is the final part, now you're after Yahoo, local module decom. They gave the suggestion to each other. Well, if you get rid of him, and he's no longer around and dad has, doesn't have to look at him anymore, therefore, he's not pleased by his presence. What a cool new member D Coleman, Sally, hey, now simple transition is, and you shall be a group of good people after this. After this after it, you shall be good people, okay, you'll be a good group. This means a few things, the word
good solid, can actually also mean you'll be in a good place, like, your situation will be better. In other words, you guys aren't doing well, right now. Life is life is pretty bad. And you know what we've thought about it together, we figured out our life is pretty bad because of you so. And if we just get a get rid of use of then after him, we're gonna be good, this is gonna life is gonna look pretty good after him. As if your life is horrible, because he exists. Your life is terrible, not because of the actions you take, or because no, no, no, because of his existence. And this is again, a twisted way of thinking something a believer couldn't do a believer who truly understands the role
of a lion their life, Allah will not make your life miserable because of the existence of someone else. Allah will not take something away from you that's meant for you your risk, your dignity, your your place in life, your portion in life, none of that can be taken away from you and handed to somebody else. And none of it is being withheld from you because somebody else is alive, or because somebody else exists. You know, Musa alayhis, Salam did not, you know, pray for all those years, he didn't pray for the death of Iran just around doesn't exist, I don't have any problems. He couldn't do that. Allah could just send them with this with the staff that turns into a snake, drop the
snake, let that snake go up there and take a bite or two out of his head, we're done. But that's not how that works, is it. But we've got this idea that we identify a person as the problem in our life. And if they weren't around, I'd have a good life, if they weren't there. And in many cases, a person like us a very son who was done, you know, wrong, but you know, they keep making me look bad. And I'm so preoccupied thinking about use of, and what how impressive he is to dad and how much he loves him more than I can't concentrate on my own life. I can't get anything done because I'm so focused on him. So you know, once a once he's gone, I'll have peace of mind. And I can actually do the good
things I want to do because I want to have a clear head
with a good woman by the common solid. And then the second meaning of common solid hang can also mean you repent, meaning, I know this is bad guys. I know killing a kid I get it. It's a pretty bad thing. But can we just do this one bad thing, and then we're never going to do anything bad again, Dad will see that we're actually really good. So we're gonna, we're gonna do this one bad thing. Let me just get rid of get get away with this one terrible thing. And I know it's bad. I know. I know. But I just have to do it. Okay, I just got to do this one thing. And then after that, watch, we're going to be so good. We're gonna be solid. This is another another one of the devil's tricks. Let me
mess up this one time. Let me do this one evil and heinous thing. Let me do this one, hold on. And then watch. Once Ramadan starts, you're gonna see a different person, bro, you don't even recognize me. You won't even recognize me. Or I'm gonna just, you know, let me just do all this messed up stuff. But then this year, I'm also going to go to hedge if I can. And once I go to HUD, you'll see a completely different person. You've this idea that I'm going to do this bad stuff. And after I do it, once I get this out of my system, I'm going to be good. I just need to get it out of my system. That's all it is, you know, because once I get it out of my system shutdown will say hey, he got it
out of his system, I should leave him alone.
Especially Don's gonna do like he's convincing you to do something evil. And you told yourself once I do this evil thing after that, I'm good. I'm no I'm no longer prone to evil, because I'm going to be good after that. Because that thought of doing evil is no longer haunting me all the time. I just got to get rid of it. So I got it done. And now I can be good. That's how the devil works. No, this is a you know, this is a this is a gateway sin. You just did one crime and then it's gonna lead to another and another and another. shutdowns are done with you. He's just getting started. He's just getting started and the best thing he can do, the most successful thing Siobhan can do against you
was the yellow hobo. shaytani r mela home the devil made their deeds look good to them.
The devil beautified their deeds to them in their mind, okay, I know this is bad. But look at the long term. After I do this bad I'm gonna be good. I can't be good if unless I do this one bad thing. So you know the, the the ends justify the means. Right? The goal is to be good. I'm doing this for a good year.
And I know you can understand that right now. I know you can have a hard time getting it, but I really do mean Well, this is why I'm doing this because I want to be a good person
know what a scam and they're feeding it to each other. They're feeding it to each other and they're all eating it up like what takuna. Remember the common solid. And then there's a third meaning of what I can remember the comments on so the first one is, everything's gonna be alright, after we do this, our life is gonna look better. We won't have to be preoccupied with him. The second is, yeah, this is bad. But you know what, after that, we'll be good people will repent, we'll make Toba and everything will be fine. And the third part of this by the way, all of this is a laws way of telling us how to shape and become a human beings enemy. Remember, Jacobi told us Japan is a human beings
enemy. And in the story shaitaan is whose enemy the brother's enemy, isn't he? And so this is how he's being their enemy, getting them to say these words. So even though they're the ones talking, we know who's whispering from behind who's egging them on into this kind of thinking. So this is a legit way of showing us the source code behind these conversations. It's actually the devil at play. And so what's the third part of this? He said, they say what the kudamon comments are. And finally, after he's gone, you see how dad can't even see what we do around here. He doesn't appreciate us, we do all the work around the house, and he doesn't appreciate anything. Well, after he's gone, he'll
finally see the good that we have in us. Because he won't be so blinded by, by use of so in his eyes, meaning dad's eyes, finally, we're going to be good.
We're finally be able to impress father,
meaning a lot of times people do the most evil things, horrendous things, because they want to win the approval of someone. They want to look a certain way in the eyes of someone whether they are that way you're not
there, you're the impression you give someone can become an object of worship,
literally an object of worship.
All you're obsesses with is what did they think of me? in their case? What does dad think of us? If we can just, I'm really I'm willing to kill, and I'm willing to ruin a child's life, and let him go through unspeakable harms. For what, because then dad will think of me better. The impression I have the dad has of me will change when someone has a certain impression of you.
If they have a certain impression of you, let's just take that out of the equation for a second. If someone has a good impression of you, of you, or a bad impression of you, let me tell you something,
it changes nothing.
The impression someone has a view changes nothing. Who you are in reality is everything. impressions are thoughts, nothing more. There's nothing more. And if someone's impression of you as good as correct, well and good. And if it's incorrect, then it's incorrect. It changes nothing in your life. But impressions the impression we want to give on people, the way we want to present ourselves to people the image we want people to have us itself can become so powerful, that so many of our choices, like I talked to you about how so many choices are dictated by comparison. So many choices are dictated by I want someone to have a different impression of me. I want them to see me
differently. You know what this is? This is when you fail to see that your obsession with somebody else's impression of you. means more to you than a law seeing you for who you are.
Like how Allah sees you how Allah sees this action, how Allah sees this conversation is erased from your conscience. It has no part in this equation. The only thing that matters is dad has a good impression. Dad has a good view. And by the way, dad could have a good view even though you're no good. Could it be possible that you can falsify an impression? You can you can make someone feel that you are a certain way and you're not that way you can? Well who can you not lie to? Not yourself and not to allies origin? They're not concerned with a lie anymore? How does a lie see me? This is a lie accepting my deeds? Is he pleased with what I'm doing? is a law pleased with what I'm
doing? You see how use of Halesowen was given this impression from the beginning? Your master is the one that has chosen you. He's the one that's teaching you. He's the one that put you to a mission. In other words, if you ever have to impress someone in your life you so who is that going to be? Allah? I don't have to impress my dad. I don't have to look good in anybody's eyes. I just have to be good with Allah and Allah will take care of everything else. You think Miriam salmonellae have looked good in people's eyes. When she came back with a baby.
Do you think Yusuf Ali's arm look good in people's eyes when he was falsely accused? Or when he was in jail for so many years? He looked good in people's eyes. You know did he look good in people's eyes with the accusations that he had to face the massage and look good in the court. When he was being accused that he killed somebody.
The look good in people's eyes when the entire all the elite have recovered.
saying he's insane,
or that he's learning this from a point or he's got an ulterior agenda, and they're accusing him of all kinds of things.
Do you think that the impression that people had of him determined his value as a person? Or it had any impact on who he is as a person? No, because the only one who is looking to please the one he does such that to the one he does such that to his mind is also his heart is also doing such that to that entity, he's not doing such data impressions. He's not doing such that to people's opinion, or social standing or ranking. But now think about where we are in the world today. How much of my, my virtual presence, your social media presence, for example, how much of it is you're obsessed with? Who liked my picture?
Who liked my comment? who appreciate it? And every time somebody likes or thumbs up, you're more valuable? And so every time somebody thumbs down, or criticizes, and there's an anger inside you, wait, what? You didn't appreciate me? You didn't like it? How do you not like it, now I'm not gonna, I'm gonna unlike something you do.
So we're living in this world of fake impressions. And in their mind, that impression, the impression they make upon their dad, what he thinks of them, is so important to them, that they're willing to do this. And only after this, will that think I'll see the good in you. They can't seem to see that even if dad sees the good in you, the bad you've done won't get erased. And that's the last thing I want to share with you about this idea. Before we get to the next one. You see, all of us, every one of us is deeply flawed, not just flawed, deeply flawed. And the people who are closest to us know that better than anybody else. When you go to a job interview, you dress up nicely, you
speak formally, you speak good words, you don't use foul language, you don't, you know, you don't put your feet on the table, you're going to act like a decent human being. When you're at home, you're going to be the monkey that you normally are. Right, your different cat, your cat, your casual self, your own true self. So the people in your family know who you for who you really are, for who you really are. And you and I are a mix of good and bad. That's just the reality. We have some good qualities, some things that our loved ones and the closest ones to us appreciate. And we have some weaknesses and bad qualities. And they call us out for those. And they see them for what
they are. Right? We want that it's never going to be that anybody in your family thinks that you're perfect.
That you're perfect. And if there's a group of young men that are around each other, and they've got this discussion going on, where they've done nothing wrong, they've got nothing to improve. Everybody else has the problem. Use of existence is the problem. Dads confusion is the problem. You know what that means? We're already perfect. Everybody else is bad. We don't have anything wrong in us. We don't have anything wrong in us. And this is where the worst of it, you know, starts inside of a family. I have to be able to admit what problem I have. And to be able to work towards fixing it. And no one in a family, not a husband or a wife, not a father, not a son, not a daughter. You
know, not a parent, not a child. Nobody. Nobody can say I'm doing nothing wrong. I have nothing to improve other people do. I do everything I'm supposed to. I'm actually 100 Allah, Allah created me without flaws. But everybody around me I don't know why they have so many flaws, which I make sure I point out every chance I get
this, this that this mentality, because you see, not worried about what they're doing wrong. And even when it comes close to admitting they're doing something wrong. It's terribly wrong, dude, you're trying to kill somebody, your own brother. Even if it comes close to that, they say no, no, but we're doing that for a good cause. We're gonna be good after that. Even that's rationalized, can't come to terms with even what you're doing yourself. This kind of self righteousness can be so toxic, because all you see is somebody else's problem. But you don't see yourself in the mirror anymore. You refuse to mela never make us from those kinds of people. This is why By the way, the
prophets lie Selim told us that a believer is a mirror a Muslim is a mirror of another Muslim. That the the analogy of the mirror is really important. Because a mirror doesn't lie to you. If you've got something on your face, the mirror will say Hey, you got something on your face. If you clean it up to mirror say Hey, good job, you cleaned it up.
If your mirrors if you're wearing dirty clothes, the mirror is not is not gonna lie to you the mirror say you're wearing dirty clothes. If you go back and change and put clean clothes on the mirror will say Hey, good job you clean clothes on. In other words, when we are each other's mirror, and the first mirror is the family itself, when you're doing something good, they can acknowledge that it's good. And when you're doing something bad, there's a blemish, there's a scar, there's something then they can say there's a blemish, we got to fix that. And let me help you clean that that's the purpose of a mirror isn't it? problem happens when the mirror tells you nothing is wrong.
You're covered in mud, you look good.
You know that's that's delusion. That's delusion. And on the flip side, that there's a mirror that says you know, even
You cleaned it up, I remember the stain from last year, let me remind it to you every day.
Right? Then you're not a mirror, then you're a recorder.
Then that's all you because that's a believer is a mirror to a believer. And so this is why, you know, in this ayah, you notice that they're not being each other's mirror, you see that they're not speaking the truth to each other, and they're creating a false image of themselves and of each other. Now, one of these brothers is kind of seems like he's got the dominant voice and some impression of some of us who don't, some scholars of the Quran is that he sort of wanted to save use of and when I compare the biblical account, there seems to be, there does seem to be one brother, Reuben, his name is in the Bible, Ruben, who wanted to save Joseph. Right. But there, the Bible
version is way different guys way different, you'll see. But for now, I want to say some impression of the scholars is that he's saying he's trying to save user from being killed. My personal inclination towards this is that that's not the case. There are two options that are being presented. Let's kill them with our own hands and get rid of the problem right now or take him some faraway place. Right? Those are the two options. So the dominant voice in the room maybe the older brother, maybe one of the more outspoken ones, basically says color car aluminium, a one one that was a speaker among them said, this is the current language, a speaker among them said or a car
among them said, Now why would a car obviously says so why? Why not say one of them said, or, you know, the older one said or whatever, you know, but it says a speaker among them said, which suggests rhetorically, Allahu Alem, that the one that's more outspoken, or when he speaks others Listen, is the one that said. So you know, sometimes in a group, you've got people throwing out ideas, but one of them when they speak, they have kind of a social gravitas to them when they speak. Everybody kind of listens. You know? So that's the voice that's now being heard. And he basically says, lots of cool use of don't kill yourself. No, basically, let's kill him. Let's throw him far
away. Okay, nobody's killing you guys. Know, don't kill yourself. And everything. Okay, so what do we do?
And he says, What? alcovy rabbeting? Job?
First of all, don't kill him. And throw him throw him in the depths in the in the dark part of the well. Now, this is important.
It's though Well, not a well,
because he didn't say go throw him in some Well, it's throw him in the dark part of though Well, now, previously, they said we should take him to some faraway place. Yes. In Arabic, there are two kinds of wells bid. And job. Beer is a well that has bricks laid around it, or stones laid around it. Right. So that's like a, they dug the hole. And they fortified it with stone and brick. Yeah, that's called a bit if they dug the hole. But and you by the way, those kinds of wells that have the stones laid around them, you find them in a village, right? You find them near the farm, etc. So there's some civilization. But then there are wells that are just a ditch in the ground. No, no
reinforcements no real work except the digging the deep ditch exists. And way at the bottom, it's so deep that you can't see it beyond a certain point it gets too dark to be able to see that part when it gets too dark to be able to see that's called the hubba hubba. And then the avatar job is the darkest part of the world way at the bottom. Yeah. And actually, they were those kinds of wells were dug uneven sometimes. So they would have little nooks and crannies, too. So they were called higher, but like a corner here in the corner, it's not a straight like going straight down rectangle, or a circle or cylinder, right? But he says, there is a well, that's unfinished, right? Because it's a
job, it's not a bit bigger will be the finished well, but the Arabic word here is a job, which is the unfinished deep ditch. What does that suggesting already? They know about a well, and they know about well, far from civilization. How do we know it's far from civilization? Because if it was close to civilization, it wouldn't have been a job, it would have been a bit it would have been would have had stones laid out, right? And so it's far out somewhere. And you know, what we should leave him out there with the rationale would be, first of all, we don't have to have blood on our hands.
Second of all, if we leave him inside of a well, then he can't run away and come back because he's smart. So you might find his way back. So we need to leave him somewhere where he can't leave. And by the way, if it's an unfinished well, and it's dug that deep in the middle of the woods somewhere, is it possible there's snakes inside? Is it possible there are other predatorial you know, animals, anything else can harm him, you know, or we don't know how to walk how deep the water might be. So there are other things that can kill him there too. So this is not an unnecessarily merciful
You know, and you can realize, I mean, we read this story as a story. But let's put this in reality for a moment. I mean, I have children. And if I like hypothetically, a 10 year old boy, and I'm going to take his shirt,
I'm gonna take a shirt off. And then I'm going to put lower him, like forcibly lower him into a deep ditch. So black that you can't see yourself. Does that sound like a merciful option to you? And do so in the middle of nowhere and then leave
and then leave. So the impression that he's trying to save us of like, some say that he tried to come back. The Bible says he came back a few days later to check on him. Right, three days later, I was like, that's really thoughtful Three days later
to check on him. But we're not accepting that version in the Quran doesn't lutenist the Quran is saying he suggested there is that well, that's unfinished. It's way out there. Why don't you drop him in there? I'll goofy rabbit Hill job.
Now, when you drop him in that, well, we don't have to deal with what happens with him next. But one possibility is because that road, it's not civilization, but it's like a highway. And on the highway. You know how nowadays on the highway, you have rest stops. Right. So sometimes people see a hole and they figured we're running low on water that might have some water in there. doesn't doesn't look like a finish? Well, well, we could try our luck, right? So he says he'll get tobacco siara maybe some part some of the traffic that goes through here. So yellow can mean caravan. But it can actually means a yacht as a as an as a concept is traffic that goes back and forth and to save.
So people pass through there, they don't really stop here because there's nothing to stop it. But maybe somebody might want to get water from here. And if they do, okay, fine, they'll find them they find them no big deal. And they'll take it, we won't be our problem anymore.
Let's just do that.
I mean, that's that's our problem. And we don't have to feel guilty like we killed him. So you'll talk to tobacco sejati. Now, you know Lucky's from the same word lucky, it actually means that a stray you know, a wandering child that gets picked up and taken in. That's actually located from the same verb delta to El Takata. It's used in a famous saying of the Prophet Solomon hikma to bilateral movement in Mr. Takata, that wisdom is the Lost Treasure of a believer, they pick it up wherever they can find it, wherever they stumble upon it. So it's literally saying, leave him in the darkest part of the well. And some people that are passing by or some whatever traffic stops there. And for
whatever reason, they might pick him up. It also seems they've been I should suggest this.
Or maybe it was a lucila himolla that suggested that he seems to be not only familiar with the well, he knows that people pass by there. But he also seems to know that this is the kind of season where the water won't be deep enough to drown him. But it's deep enough for him to be invisible, or barely be audible. So even if he cries for help, nobody's going to be able to see him because if he's invisible, but he can still cry and scream that takes the point away from being invisible, right? So I better job meaning so deep down that he's hidden away. But still, it won't kill him. It will just leave him in the water down there. Right so that's the merciful suggestion that that he comes up
with other car elumen home laptop to Lucifer while goofy rabbit and job y'all Taka tobacco car. And then at the end of it, he says incoterm for it, which means two things in good to finally means one. I mean, if you are * bent on doing something, okay, let's just do this. Literally test if you will do if you are bent upon doing. So what that means is if you're going to do something, if you guys just really just want to take action now. Well, that's the one. If you're going to do it, just do this. The other is I'm not saying this is what you have to do. But if you want to take my suggestion, if I were you, I would do this. It's kind of soft suggestion towards that. Now come
back, there were two options, kill him, take him somewhere far away. He said don't kill him. And I've got a more specific idea about taking him far away. So he's not rejecting the second suggestion. He's actually reinforcing the second suggestion and adding to it, you see what he's done. So he's building on that notion that's already there. In other words, he's not disagreeing with his brothers. He's not disagreeing with them. He's just saying this is how we're gonna deal with him. You know, so other car illumine home lotta elusive while goofy rabbit job, Taco Bell era. So what does that tell you that tells you that there are, you know, in life, sometimes there are
people that just want you out of the way.
They just want you out of the way somehow they think that you are the problem. And if they can't hurt you, which is taken out of the and in most cases, obviously that's not going to be an option because that would be criminal, right? But getting someone out of the way can be criminal like it is here. But it can also be social. It can also be psychological. It can also be financial, stop paying for their tuition, stop doing this or stop doing that. There's other ways you can get somebody
out of the way, isn't it? And so the second second suggestion is, what was taken is actually what's taken in most family conspiracies, most family huddles, when you're trying to gang up against one person, how do we get rid of that this person from our life? Or how do we have them fall in the eyes of someone? How do we remove them from attention, then the way to get rid of them is going to be one of these schemes that are going to distance them from those that they love, create some kind of distance, you know, Shetlands, great job is to create rifts in family relations. In the shaitana Anzio, Bina comprion says, speak in better terms, because the devil wants to create friction between
you double the shaitaan no doubt wants to create friction between you in the story of Luton, Napoleon in haruta, marut, in certain Bukhara. Allah says that they used to learn magic. And the purpose of that evil magic was you follow the hoonah be binary, he was odd, that they could cause some kind of partition and separation between a man and his wife. That's that was the goal of it, to create that kind of, you know, tension between spouse and wife. Why? Because the chatons you know, his one of his goals is to take relationships that are supposed to be held together and cut them apart. This is why the corrupt people, corrupt people in the beginning of sort of Bukhara, Allah
describes one of their crimes as well. Dr. odema amatola, who behind us Allah will you see do nothing, they cut apart what Allah commanded to keep together. They cut apart, what Allah command to keep joined. Now what is what are the look command to keep joined family ties, he wants to family ties to stay join, but the devil wants those to be cut apart. And when family ties get cut apart, then the next thing is, well, you do nothing. And then by doing so they create corruption in the land. You know what this, I didn't see a connection to this. And I'll just kind of make a quick reference entire for today inshallah, is when I was a long time ago, I was studying criminal
sociology, and also criminology. I took a course and I was curious about it. And there was an interview with a judge from Brooklyn, New York, who's a judge of a juvenile court, right, and he's serving on the court for like, 40 years. And he's seen teenage kids, like get into gangs, murder, drugs, all kinds of things right and ruin their lives ruined their futures. And he seen young young men and young women destroy themselves in this way. And he was asked at the end. So what do you see as the problem after retiring? What do you see as the problem? He says, broken families? Like it was a one word answer for him, after 40 years of seeing cases, he said, broken families. And what he
means by that is exactly this. Not just single moms and single dads, there's nothing wrong with being a single mom or a single dad. But when families get broken, and there are no, you know, there's no supervision. And there's no real ties inside of the family, then you create ties outside that tie could be a gang, that tie could be a toxic group of friends, that tie could be virtual, horrible people that you meet online, that you create a tie with and you create a column, you join them for a common interest, that's no good for you or them or your dean or your dunya. But you find other ways to affiliate because the family bonds aren't strong enough. And that's really what
creates facade in the earth. What creates corruption in the earth. And trouble in the world is when families are no longer as as they should be. And relationships aren't any longer as they should be. And that's exactly what's happening here. These brothers are creating a rift inside the family. And it's going to create all kinds of chaos. In the case of use of La Salaam, he ends up in prison, and he's still able to hold on to his character. But how many young people end up in the wrong hands? And what kind of lives is lead them to? And when they're broken away from their families, when they don't have any adult supervision? What kind of life does a young man or woman have growing up when
they're coming up from the streets? You know, this is this is the reality that's being painted in very profound words, and just let him go, some caravan will pick him up if this if that's what you're going to do, he'll be somebody else's problem. We'll see about what we wouldn't have to deal with it. And then they can come back and be be good in the eyes of their their father. So from here, they've made this decision, you know what, agreed. Everybody's made consensus, you know, on this evil deed, and now that they've made this consensus, what's going to happen next in the story, is they're going to come to dad and convince him to let him let us have Allison come along with us. And
jacoba Sam is gonna see right through what they're saying. We'll explore some of that tomorrow and shout out Allah barakallahu li walakum wa salaamu Alaikum wa barakato
Oh wait, it's tradition.