Nouman Ali Khan – Remarkable Stories – Death – Dealing with Grief & Loss with Hamza Belfedhal

Nouman Ali Khan
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AI: Summary ©

The speakers discuss their experiences with Islam and their journey to the UK, where they faced challenges and faced tragic events with their former founders. They also discuss their experiences with their former founders and their upcoming trip to Dublin. They share their experiences with their former founders and their upcoming trip to Dublin. They also discuss the use of cutting words for grief and the importance of responding to grief, and emphasize the need for a response to it.

AI: Summary ©

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			Soon as I got that news,
		
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			my heart sunk to my stomach because I
		
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			must have hit you so hard.
		
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			I didn't know what to think. Allah
		
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			has never tested me with something like this
		
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			ever.
		
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			Tubes in his mouth and wires all over
		
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			it, something out of the movies. That's the
		
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			guy I spoke to 15 minutes and this
		
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			is what happened.
		
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			I remember one of the challenges was that
		
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			we were swimming in a place called the
		
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			44 here in Dulere.
		
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			And it's a place where people jump in
		
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			through water.
		
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			Because one thing you need to know that
		
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			me and Suhayb Rahmahullah and Riyadh will never
		
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			ever go swimming alone. It's a thing that
		
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			we've never ever done. We're always together.
		
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			I got unexpected call that I need to
		
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			leave Ireland. I need to go to the
		
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			UK as soon as possible. Okay. Allah
		
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			wanted me out of the country.
		
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			As I'm on the way back, I get
		
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			a call from Sahib Rahim Allah. Connection got
		
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			interrupted and disconnected.
		
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			15 minutes
		
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			after, I get a phone call. And I'm
		
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			hearing walkie talks in the background. I'm hearing
		
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			a lady speaking in the background. Oh. I'm
		
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			like I'm like, what happened? Man, I can
		
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			hear the machines.
		
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			People crying and.
		
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			It's a kid's on his he's on his
		
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			final moments. Saka Rathe Moat, he's about to
		
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			go. I've
		
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			never ever been hit with something like that
		
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			in my life.
		
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			Like if it wasn't for Islam,
		
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			I would have lost it. I would have
		
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			gone crazy. That's the only thing that was
		
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			holding me back.
		
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			Allah tests you based on the first salamah,
		
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			the first hit. You can't lose yourself in
		
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			the first hit and then be like, oh,
		
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			yeah. Allah is telling me, you failed.
		
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			Allah tested you on the first salamah. What
		
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			are you going to do?
		
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			How are you? How are you? Tell me
		
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			a little bit about yourself.
		
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			So, my name's Hamza. I'm born and raised
		
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			in Dublin, Ireland.
		
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			23.
		
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			My parents are from Algeria.
		
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			That's basically in a nutshell
		
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			about myself.
		
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			What do I do? Yeah.
		
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			Alhamdulillah,
		
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			we
		
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			established the youth organization here in Dublin, Ireland.
		
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			Me and 3 of the brothers,
		
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			it's called 1 Badi 1 Ummah.
		
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			It's based on the hadith of the prophet,
		
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			peace be upon him, where he's explained that
		
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			the ummah is like 1 body. Right. If
		
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			a part of it hurts,
		
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			the whole body doesn't sleep at night until
		
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			How how long have you been doing the
		
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			youth group thing?
		
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			I've been involved with the community ever since
		
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			we were raised. We were raised in the
		
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			local mosque, one of the biggest mosques here
		
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			in Ireland. Yeah. And,
		
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			to be honest, we were raised with any
		
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			academic events,
		
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			any different halaqas,
		
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			by our elders, etcetera. So
		
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			the idea started off
		
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			with, when we were just 3 in the
		
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			borders, me, Riyadh and Suhayb
		
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			where we decided
		
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			to raise funds for a charity, basically. This
		
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			wasn't
		
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			Like an international charity? Yeah. Basically, it's
		
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			a it's a registered charity here in Ireland.
		
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			We started off with Human Appeal, Human Appeal
		
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			in Ireland. That was our first,
		
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			ever
		
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			charitable organization that we've ever started with. And
		
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			we started as something that's
		
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			we're doing good for basically
		
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			the people for the sake of Allah Subhanahu
		
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			Wa Ta'ala.
		
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			And I think I remember one of the
		
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			challenges was that we were swimming in a
		
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			place called the 44 here in Dunlari, nearly
		
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			where you had 2 today at Loza, especially
		
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			2 minutes away from it. And it's a
		
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			place where people jump in to the water.
		
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			It's very cold. And we decided to do
		
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			it in the winter months. Are you serious?
		
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			Yeah. You jumped in the cold water in
		
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			the winter months. Yes. While it was snowing.
		
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			While it was snowing? While it was snowing,
		
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			yeah. Like even So the intelligence level is
		
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			unusually high. Very high,
		
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			Yeah. It's, it's an interesting one, to be
		
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			honest.
		
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			Alhamdulillah, we start we started off as an
		
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			idea. How, like, especially
		
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			stupid things people call it interesting. Yeah. Okay.
		
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			But anyway, go on. Go on. So you
		
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			could tell how, basically, the idea kicked off.
		
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			We were adrenaline junkies basically. Yeah. Always looking
		
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			for a thrill.
		
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			Everything, anything that's exciting. Nobody got hurt, right?
		
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			Nobody got hypothermia or No. No.
		
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			For the challenges, no. But,
		
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			as we started to establish the organization, it
		
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			was me, Riyadh, and Suhayb We,
		
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			we thought of we're thinking of different names,
		
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			and I think Riyadh came up with the
		
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			names. Why don't we call it any one
		
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			body, one ummah, and one body, one nation?
		
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			We started off with different names. We fell
		
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			off with, like, we're comfortable with 1 body,
		
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			1 ummah. That's how we established it. And
		
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			we started off with doing activities that
		
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			hasn't been done before in terms of,
		
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			swimming in every single county in Ireland. For
		
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			example, swimming in every single city, like you
		
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			say in America, in Ireland in 5 days.
		
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			So we've covered every single city in Ireland
		
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			and we swam in every single county in
		
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			Ireland in 5 days to raise funds for
		
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			the Irish homeless. And,
		
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			Interesting. Yeah. And it caught attention by the
		
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			news media because it hasn't been attempted before.
		
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			And they could, like, we've raised, it's only
		
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			it wasn't a large amount like our previous
		
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			fundraisers, but the impact that it had
		
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			on the Irish people was far much better
		
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			than the funds that were raised. Why do
		
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			I say that? Because
		
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			we raised around 2 or €3,000 which is
		
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			it's good but it's very minimal. Right. But
		
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			the impact it had when we were looking
		
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			at our social media accounts and we were
		
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			looking at the comments, there was Irish people,
		
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			non Muslims commenting
		
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			oh my God, 3 Muslims are doing things
		
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			that the people of Ireland are not doing.
		
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			They're helping our own. 3 Muslims are doing
		
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			this, and why are we doing this? So
		
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			when they're looking at Muslims and Islam
		
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			from that channel How beautiful. Yeah.
		
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			So, you know, moving on we decided to
		
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			really
		
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			like, this started to grow gradually,
		
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			and we decided to, I knew, like, we
		
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			can actually make something out of this, you
		
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			know, for our, like, we know the prophet,
		
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			peace be upon him, said that there's 3
		
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			things that follow,
		
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			that continuous
		
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			rewards after your death, and one of them
		
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			is
		
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			continuous charity. So why don't we set up
		
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			an organization where it would benefit the 3
		
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			of us even after we pass away and
		
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			we can pass on to the next generation?
		
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			And that's what we've been doing lately. There
		
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			has been times where,
		
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			it slowed down, people get busy, you have
		
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			work, college, etcetera.
		
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			But still go until this day. And
		
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			we've recently had
		
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			a quite tragic incident with one of our
		
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			founders, like I mentioned, Suhay Bahramahullah.
		
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			Where it happened?
		
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			He, actually drowned in the same place that
		
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			we were doing these crazy challenges in.
		
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			How old was he? 23, same age as
		
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			me.
		
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			Wow.
		
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			He,
		
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			the story about it was, it was me
		
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			and the Muad.
		
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			We were
		
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			thinking about it, it still mind boggling me
		
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			till this day. Uh-huh. How Allah planned everything.
		
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			Because one thing you need to know that
		
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			me and Sohayb Rahimahullah and Riyadh will never
		
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			ever go swimming alone. It's a thing that
		
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			we've never ever done. We're always together.
		
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			We've never ever swam alone since we've known
		
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			each other. And
		
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			in the past couple of years, like me
		
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			and Sohayb became and he's he was my
		
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			best friend.
		
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			And,
		
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			like, every single
		
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			day, I'm seeing him.
		
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			So
		
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			the the day before the incident,
		
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			I got unexpected call that I need to
		
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			leave Ireland. I need to go to the
		
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			UK as soon as possible. On board, I
		
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			needed my help, basically. Okay.
		
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			And it was like 11 PM near midnight.
		
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			So any excuse that I gave to my
		
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			brother, he found a solution to it. Oh,
		
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			I'm too tired. Oh, I'll do this. Oh,
		
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			I can't walk a flight. Okay, I'll do
		
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			this. Every single problem I gave him there
		
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			was solution to it. Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
		
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			wanted me out of the country.
		
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			So I left,
		
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			it was meant to be a one day
		
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			quick trip. Yeah. I'm back. As I'm on
		
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			the way back, I get a call from
		
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			Sahib Rahimu Allah and,
		
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			he's going, Hamza, yo Hamza, where you at?
		
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			I'm just coming back from,
		
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			Manchester.
		
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			I'm going back to Dublin.
		
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			Where are you?
		
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			And, he flipped the camera, and it was
		
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			the same place that we were in, 44.
		
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			I was like, are you jumping in? Are
		
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			you jumping in?
		
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			Then the connection got interrupted. I was in
		
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			the motorway. And,
		
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			the thing is like me, like, Subhaib radiAllahu
		
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			was really looking forward to entering
		
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			swimming because, like, he was graduating this year,
		
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			he finished his final 4 years of computer
		
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			science,
		
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			And he was under a lot of stress,
		
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			final projects.
		
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			And he was really looking forward
		
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			to getting it off his chest. And one
		
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			of his ways on releasing stress is swimming.
		
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			He really got addicted to it.
		
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			So and coming up to it,
		
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			I used to always go to the place
		
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			and I was, Oh, sorry, but you're coming
		
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			down? He's like, No, no, no. I have
		
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			to focus on my studies. You know, my
		
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			mom really wants me to focus on my
		
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			studies. As soon as I finish, let's let's
		
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			go. And we had plans for Saturday
		
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			to really and he go swimming and
		
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			have food and catch up, basically.
		
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			So the connection got interrupted and disconnected 15
		
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			minutes
		
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			after it, I get a phone call from
		
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			one of his older brothers.
		
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			And
		
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			it's from a fake account on Instagram, so
		
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			I didn't want to answer. And he's calling
		
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			and calling and calling and calling.
		
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			I answered, Assalamu alaikum, who's this?
		
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			Assalam, it's Mohammed.
		
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			Who is Mohammed? He says, I'm Suhaib's brother,
		
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			where are you?
		
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			Coming back to Dublin. Where's Suhaib?
		
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			I don't know. I spoke to him 15
		
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			minutes ago. What are you what are you
		
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			talking about? And I'm hearing walkie talkies in
		
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			the background. I'm hearing a lady speaking in
		
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			the background. Oh, no. I'm like I'm like,
		
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			What happened?
		
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			He's like, Who who is he with? I'm
		
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			like, I don't know. There was no one
		
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			there. It was only me and him speaking.
		
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			That was it.
		
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			What happened?
		
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			And there was nothing there.
		
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			Couple of minutes go by and
		
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			I started
		
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			any thinking about the worst. It's a car
		
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			crash. Drowning? No. It's impossible. So I was
		
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			kinda drowned. He's amazing swimmer. We've been swimming
		
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			there for years. He wouldn't drown. That was
		
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			out of the picture.
		
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			So I'm looking at Google Maps. I'm zooming
		
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			into roads. Has there been any accidents? I'm
		
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			zooming in. My head's playing crazy games.
		
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			And then we call one of his older
		
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			brothers,
		
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			and he says,
		
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			yeah, he's in critical unit.
		
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			In allah. Intensive care and he's been found
		
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			drowned.
		
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			Soon as I got that news,
		
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			my heart sunk to my stomach because,
		
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			we were coming. You were driving at the
		
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			ferry? Yeah, I was, yeah, we were hopping
		
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			under the ferry and then I told him
		
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			my heart. I was like, my heart, my
		
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			heart. Like, I don't know the feeling. I
		
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			can't explain it to you. And he was
		
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			like, pull over. Pull over. Pull over.
		
00:11:10 --> 00:11:12
			I don't know. It's like someone just came
		
00:11:12 --> 00:11:13
			and gave me
		
00:11:14 --> 00:11:16
			a smack. I've never felt something like this
		
00:11:16 --> 00:11:18
			ever in my life. I've lost my grandmother.
		
00:11:18 --> 00:11:20
			I've lost my cousins, I've lost my grandfather,
		
00:11:21 --> 00:11:21
			I've lost.
		
00:11:22 --> 00:11:22
			But
		
00:11:23 --> 00:11:25
			with this individual So you didn't see it
		
00:11:25 --> 00:11:28
			coming at all. And not like,
		
00:11:29 --> 00:11:30
			like we've lost any
		
00:11:31 --> 00:11:32
			guy from the youth
		
00:11:32 --> 00:11:34
			a couple of years ago.
		
00:11:34 --> 00:11:34
			And
		
00:11:35 --> 00:11:37
			any of I was always the guy that's
		
00:11:37 --> 00:11:38
			consoling,
		
00:11:39 --> 00:11:40
			have patience. Sabar.
		
00:11:40 --> 00:11:42
			It's okay. It's in the.
		
00:11:43 --> 00:11:45
			But there's a famous saying that says,
		
00:11:50 --> 00:11:52
			How easy is it to speak about patience
		
00:11:52 --> 00:11:54
			When it's not your calamity. When it's not
		
00:11:54 --> 00:11:55
			your calamity.
		
00:11:55 --> 00:11:57
			And that was just playing on my head
		
00:11:57 --> 00:11:59
			over and over and over again. Now I
		
00:11:59 --> 00:12:00
			understand.
		
00:12:00 --> 00:12:03
			What people are going through. What people are
		
00:12:03 --> 00:12:04
			going through. And then,
		
00:12:05 --> 00:12:07
			oh my God. I must have hit you
		
00:12:07 --> 00:12:07
			so hard.
		
00:12:08 --> 00:12:10
			I didn't know what to think. I didn't
		
00:12:10 --> 00:12:12
			know what to think. I'm going around, I'm
		
00:12:12 --> 00:12:14
			walking around. There's still hope. He's in critical
		
00:12:14 --> 00:12:16
			unit. Yeah. There's still hope. He's gonna get
		
00:12:16 --> 00:12:18
			up. We're gonna speak to him. He's gonna
		
00:12:18 --> 00:12:19
			get back on his feet.
		
00:12:20 --> 00:12:22
			All of these thoughts. I'm in the very
		
00:12:22 --> 00:12:24
			the very street hours from the UK, it's
		
00:12:24 --> 00:12:25
			3 hours. I'm
		
00:12:25 --> 00:12:27
			just sitting down, I'm thinking, I'm walking around,
		
00:12:27 --> 00:12:30
			I'm praying, making duh, I'm walking around up
		
00:12:30 --> 00:12:32
			and down. I'm just I don't know. My
		
00:12:32 --> 00:12:32
			mind's doing
		
00:12:33 --> 00:12:34
			back flips.
		
00:12:35 --> 00:12:35
			And,
		
00:12:36 --> 00:12:37
			we we go to the hospital straight away
		
00:12:37 --> 00:12:38
			as soon as we land, and,
		
00:12:39 --> 00:12:40
			you know, they said they can't
		
00:12:40 --> 00:12:42
			no one's allowed to enter at the moment.
		
00:12:42 --> 00:12:44
			There's too many people. First thing in the
		
00:12:44 --> 00:12:46
			morning, the next day I go
		
00:12:46 --> 00:12:46
			and,
		
00:12:47 --> 00:12:49
			see him there, and it's just
		
00:12:50 --> 00:12:52
			tubes in his mouth and wires all over
		
00:12:52 --> 00:12:53
			it.
		
00:12:53 --> 00:12:54
			Something out of the movies.
		
00:12:55 --> 00:12:56
			Like, that's
		
00:12:57 --> 00:12:59
			that's the guy I spoke to 15 minutes
		
00:12:59 --> 00:13:00
			and this is what happened?
		
00:13:01 --> 00:13:01
			Like,
		
00:13:02 --> 00:13:03
			what?
		
00:13:04 --> 00:13:04
			And,
		
00:13:05 --> 00:13:07
			I'm a guy that usually never really tears
		
00:13:07 --> 00:13:08
			up.
		
00:13:08 --> 00:13:11
			But seeing my best mate there in that
		
00:13:11 --> 00:13:12
			situation,
		
00:13:13 --> 00:13:15
			There's just that flowin', you know? And,
		
00:13:16 --> 00:13:18
			it's very hard to see, you know?
		
00:13:19 --> 00:13:20
			That was like
		
00:13:20 --> 00:13:22
			my blood brother, you know. He was literally
		
00:13:22 --> 00:13:25
			Yeah. My blood brother. Like, yeah, there's there's
		
00:13:25 --> 00:13:27
			people that you meet in life and
		
00:13:28 --> 00:13:29
			they're even closer to you than
		
00:13:30 --> 00:13:31
			your own blood brother. I have an older
		
00:13:31 --> 00:13:32
			brother, but suhaima
		
00:13:33 --> 00:13:35
			Allah was closer to him than me.
		
00:13:35 --> 00:13:36
			And he was
		
00:13:37 --> 00:13:39
			an individual that always motivated me in terms
		
00:13:39 --> 00:13:42
			of salat. He was known for not missing
		
00:13:42 --> 00:13:44
			a single prayer in the masjid. He was
		
00:13:44 --> 00:13:46
			known for his manners. He was known
		
00:13:48 --> 00:13:49
			for doing good.
		
00:13:49 --> 00:13:50
			And he hates cameras.
		
00:13:51 --> 00:13:52
			One of the things I always remember about
		
00:13:52 --> 00:13:55
			Subhayhi wa rhammulahi hates cameras. I'm a guy
		
00:13:55 --> 00:13:57
			that always records. I'm always on social media
		
00:13:57 --> 00:13:59
			promoting everything. He's gonna have to record me.
		
00:13:59 --> 00:14:01
			Don't record me, bud. Don't record me. And
		
00:14:01 --> 00:14:03
			he to the point where he's like, okay,
		
00:14:03 --> 00:14:04
			Khasa give up, this guy's never gonna stop
		
00:14:04 --> 00:14:07
			recording me. Just do your thing. So he
		
00:14:07 --> 00:14:08
			always likes to hide
		
00:14:08 --> 00:14:09
			his deeds.
		
00:14:10 --> 00:14:10
			And,
		
00:14:11 --> 00:14:13
			that's one of the things that,
		
00:14:13 --> 00:14:15
			like, I'm still shocked about. Like, this is
		
00:14:15 --> 00:14:17
			the things that I know about him that
		
00:14:17 --> 00:14:17
			I've seen.
		
00:14:18 --> 00:14:20
			What he what does he have hidden between
		
00:14:20 --> 00:14:21
			him and Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala that we
		
00:14:21 --> 00:14:22
			don't know about?
		
00:14:23 --> 00:14:24
			You know? Yeah.
		
00:14:24 --> 00:14:25
			So
		
00:14:26 --> 00:14:27
			that moment in my life was, well, lies
		
00:14:27 --> 00:14:29
			like I've never ever
		
00:14:30 --> 00:14:32
			been hit with something like that in my
		
00:14:32 --> 00:14:34
			life. So Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala has never
		
00:14:34 --> 00:14:36
			tested me with something like this ever.
		
00:14:37 --> 00:14:39
			And like I said, we've been through calamities,
		
00:14:39 --> 00:14:41
			we've been through hardship, but this one was
		
00:14:41 --> 00:14:42
			a real test.
		
00:14:42 --> 00:14:44
			Like, Allah has really put me to the
		
00:14:44 --> 00:14:46
			test there. What are you gonna do now?
		
00:14:46 --> 00:14:47
			Are you gonna be patient? Are you gonna
		
00:14:47 --> 00:14:48
			be
		
00:14:49 --> 00:14:50
			and,
		
00:14:51 --> 00:14:53
			the critical unit was a nightmare
		
00:14:54 --> 00:14:56
			every single day. I I couldn't leave the
		
00:14:56 --> 00:14:56
			hospital.
		
00:14:57 --> 00:14:58
			I couldn't leave the hospital. I left the
		
00:14:58 --> 00:15:01
			hospital for one day. I couldn't sleep all
		
00:15:01 --> 00:15:01
			night.
		
00:15:01 --> 00:15:03
			I'm at home. I'm just opening my eyes.
		
00:15:03 --> 00:15:04
			I'm just thinking. I was like, I can't
		
00:15:04 --> 00:15:05
			sleep here.
		
00:15:06 --> 00:15:07
			I had to go sleep slept in the
		
00:15:07 --> 00:15:09
			hospital. We got the most uncomfortable sleep in
		
00:15:09 --> 00:15:11
			my life, but it is what it is.
		
00:15:11 --> 00:15:13
			We got, like, 2 couches and slept, and
		
00:15:13 --> 00:15:14
			I used to wake up with back pain
		
00:15:14 --> 00:15:17
			every single day, but I've done the job.
		
00:15:17 --> 00:15:19
			And that's that went on for now, nearly
		
00:15:19 --> 00:15:20
			2 or 3 weeks, just sleeping in the
		
00:15:20 --> 00:15:22
			hospital. I couldn't sleep at home.
		
00:15:23 --> 00:15:23
			And,
		
00:15:26 --> 00:15:28
			and then the doctors and the consultants just
		
00:15:28 --> 00:15:29
			kept saying
		
00:15:29 --> 00:15:31
			to the family, there's no improvements,
		
00:15:31 --> 00:15:33
			and there's little to no brain activity in
		
00:15:33 --> 00:15:34
			in the brain.
		
00:15:35 --> 00:15:35
			And,
		
00:15:37 --> 00:15:38
			they were basically telling the family that we
		
00:15:38 --> 00:15:40
			need to take the plugs off.
		
00:15:40 --> 00:15:42
			And the family was like, no. Islam, we
		
00:15:42 --> 00:15:44
			can't do that. No. There's hope. His heart
		
00:15:44 --> 00:15:45
			is still beating.
		
00:15:46 --> 00:15:48
			It's been going on back and forth, and
		
00:15:48 --> 00:15:50
			they were like, listen. That's it.
		
00:15:50 --> 00:15:53
			Legally speaking in Ireland, he has to go.
		
00:15:53 --> 00:15:55
			We've given him more than
		
00:15:55 --> 00:15:56
			what we can.
		
00:15:56 --> 00:15:58
			And the family was like, okay. What kind
		
00:15:58 --> 00:15:59
			of alternative
		
00:16:00 --> 00:16:03
			solutions do we have? They were like, take
		
00:16:03 --> 00:16:04
			him somewhere else.
		
00:16:05 --> 00:16:06
			All of all of Ireland wouldn't accept him
		
00:16:06 --> 00:16:07
			in the state.
		
00:16:08 --> 00:16:10
			So they started calling home. He was from
		
00:16:10 --> 00:16:11
			Libya.
		
00:16:12 --> 00:16:14
			And, Libya was like, no, you can't accept
		
00:16:14 --> 00:16:15
			him in the state.
		
00:16:16 --> 00:16:16
			But,
		
00:16:17 --> 00:16:19
			they made a few other phone calls
		
00:16:19 --> 00:16:21
			and a lot of dua, a lot
		
00:16:21 --> 00:16:23
			of a lot of connections. Alhamdulillah.
		
00:16:24 --> 00:16:25
			They decided to accept him.
		
00:16:26 --> 00:16:28
			And, they put him in a on a
		
00:16:28 --> 00:16:31
			on a private jet ambulance, and they took
		
00:16:31 --> 00:16:31
			him.
		
00:16:31 --> 00:16:34
			And, 2 or 2 weeks or 3 weeks
		
00:16:34 --> 00:16:36
			after I get a message, make a dua.
		
00:16:37 --> 00:16:40
			Make a okay. You've been making dua? What's
		
00:16:40 --> 00:16:40
			this?
		
00:16:41 --> 00:16:42
			So I decided to call him, and I
		
00:16:42 --> 00:16:44
			can hear the machines. There's
		
00:16:46 --> 00:16:47
			people crying and.
		
00:16:48 --> 00:16:49
			He's a kid. He's on he's on he's
		
00:16:49 --> 00:16:51
			on his final moments. He's
		
00:16:51 --> 00:16:52
			about to go.
		
00:16:54 --> 00:16:55
			Here we go. I'm home alone now. My
		
00:16:55 --> 00:16:56
			parents are not home.
		
00:16:58 --> 00:17:00
			And I'm hearing different stories. People are saying,
		
00:17:00 --> 00:17:01
			and
		
00:17:01 --> 00:17:03
			I'm like, what are you talking about? I'm
		
00:17:03 --> 00:17:05
			speaking to his brother right now. The machines
		
00:17:05 --> 00:17:07
			are still blaring. But the other day I
		
00:17:07 --> 00:17:09
			know that the machines means halal, the hats,
		
00:17:09 --> 00:17:10
			has stopped beating.
		
00:17:10 --> 00:17:12
			So I'm starting, like, my emotions are taking
		
00:17:12 --> 00:17:14
			over me now. You know, he's not dead.
		
00:17:14 --> 00:17:15
			He's not dead. Where did you get the
		
00:17:15 --> 00:17:17
			news? He's not dead. He's not dead.
		
00:17:18 --> 00:17:20
			And, that's it. When he said, Allah's
		
00:17:22 --> 00:17:23
			command to
		
00:17:24 --> 00:17:26
			Allah. That's when the real reality sunk in
		
00:17:26 --> 00:17:27
			because
		
00:17:27 --> 00:17:29
			that little bit of hope was killing me.
		
00:17:29 --> 00:17:31
			He can survive. He can survive. He can
		
00:17:31 --> 00:17:32
			survive. Yeah.
		
00:17:32 --> 00:17:33
			But then
		
00:17:34 --> 00:17:36
			the stamp of reality came and just
		
00:17:37 --> 00:17:39
			ended it all. It's reminding me of when,
		
00:17:41 --> 00:17:44
			my sister had cancer, and then it went
		
00:17:44 --> 00:17:46
			away. She went and she had chemo. She
		
00:17:46 --> 00:17:48
			didn't tell anyone. She tried to hide her
		
00:17:48 --> 00:17:49
			from the family,
		
00:17:50 --> 00:17:52
			and it went away. Then it came back
		
00:17:52 --> 00:17:52
			much stronger,
		
00:17:53 --> 00:17:54
			And,
		
00:17:54 --> 00:17:57
			she got hospitalized, and then now it couldn't
		
00:17:57 --> 00:17:59
			be hidden. So now everybody got to find
		
00:17:59 --> 00:18:01
			out. The family got to find out,
		
00:18:02 --> 00:18:03
			And she got to a point where
		
00:18:05 --> 00:18:07
			she had to be put in a specialized,
		
00:18:08 --> 00:18:09
			unit.
		
00:18:10 --> 00:18:11
			But in Dallas, where we live,
		
00:18:12 --> 00:18:14
			they consider that a nonemergency
		
00:18:14 --> 00:18:16
			because the medical system in the United States
		
00:18:16 --> 00:18:17
			is,
		
00:18:18 --> 00:18:20
			I don't have words to describe the corruption,
		
00:18:20 --> 00:18:22
			but it's not an emergency. So you can't
		
00:18:22 --> 00:18:24
			transfer her to the specialized hospital.
		
00:18:25 --> 00:18:27
			So we find out that the closest specialized
		
00:18:27 --> 00:18:28
			hospital is in,
		
00:18:29 --> 00:18:30
			is in Houston,
		
00:18:31 --> 00:18:32
			4 hour drive away.
		
00:18:33 --> 00:18:34
			And we're like, okay. Can we get an
		
00:18:34 --> 00:18:36
			ambulance to at least
		
00:18:36 --> 00:18:38
			take her there? Because they would take they
		
00:18:38 --> 00:18:40
			they might take her if you go in
		
00:18:40 --> 00:18:41
			through the emergency room.
		
00:18:42 --> 00:18:44
			Not actual transfer, but you block in like
		
00:18:44 --> 00:18:45
			in a walk in emergency,
		
00:18:45 --> 00:18:47
			they might take her.
		
00:18:48 --> 00:18:49
			Wouldn't give us an ambulance.
		
00:18:49 --> 00:18:51
			Wow. So I for the first time, I
		
00:18:51 --> 00:18:53
			drove an RV. You know, those mobile Yeah.
		
00:18:53 --> 00:18:55
			Yeah. Yeah. I I got one of those.
		
00:18:55 --> 00:18:57
			My her her husband,
		
00:18:58 --> 00:19:00
			he drove the car. I carried her into
		
00:19:00 --> 00:19:02
			the back, and I'm just lying her lying
		
00:19:02 --> 00:19:04
			with her in the back, just making sure
		
00:19:04 --> 00:19:05
			she doesn't fall because she couldn't even sit
		
00:19:05 --> 00:19:07
			up. Wow. And we drove through the night,
		
00:19:08 --> 00:19:08
			like,
		
00:19:09 --> 00:19:11
			to the to the hospital. I put her
		
00:19:11 --> 00:19:13
			in a wheelchair, and we walk in. And
		
00:19:13 --> 00:19:15
			then that's how she got admitted admitted to
		
00:19:15 --> 00:19:17
			that. Because the first hospital told her she
		
00:19:17 --> 00:19:17
			has
		
00:19:17 --> 00:19:19
			she's not going to last a day, but
		
00:19:19 --> 00:19:20
			they wouldn't let her go to a hospital.
		
00:19:20 --> 00:19:21
			They wouldn't have transport?
		
00:19:22 --> 00:19:24
			No. No. So then we went through the
		
00:19:24 --> 00:19:26
			emergency room. They diagnosed her in an hour,
		
00:19:26 --> 00:19:28
			then they put her in the cancer unit
		
00:19:29 --> 00:19:30
			that they were refusing to put her in
		
00:19:30 --> 00:19:31
			otherwise.
		
00:19:31 --> 00:19:33
			And now she's there, and she would literally
		
00:19:33 --> 00:19:35
			be you know how you were sitting next
		
00:19:35 --> 00:19:36
			to your friend and you couldn't leave the
		
00:19:36 --> 00:19:37
			hospital?
		
00:19:37 --> 00:19:38
			I don't live in,
		
00:19:39 --> 00:19:41
			Houston. I live in Dallas. So I just
		
00:19:42 --> 00:19:43
			I'm now at this point, just living in
		
00:19:43 --> 00:19:44
			the hospital,
		
00:19:44 --> 00:19:46
			practically and down the street from it. I
		
00:19:46 --> 00:19:47
			got my parents,
		
00:19:47 --> 00:19:49
			a hotel. I'm just going back and forth
		
00:19:49 --> 00:19:51
			from the hospital. And she'd wake up maybe
		
00:19:52 --> 00:19:54
			5 minutes in a day, 8 minutes in
		
00:19:54 --> 00:19:56
			a day, say a word or 2. And
		
00:19:56 --> 00:19:58
			she used to work with me at Vienna.
		
00:19:58 --> 00:19:59
			So,
		
00:20:00 --> 00:20:02
			you know, and she just in, in like
		
00:20:02 --> 00:20:04
			half conscious, she'd just say my name. I'd
		
00:20:04 --> 00:20:05
			be, I'm right here. I'm right here. And
		
00:20:05 --> 00:20:07
			she'd refuse to eat. And then
		
00:20:07 --> 00:20:09
			the only one she'd drink something from is
		
00:20:09 --> 00:20:11
			if I'm holding it for her. So like
		
00:20:12 --> 00:20:13
			I'd give her and then
		
00:20:14 --> 00:20:16
			just 2 weeks before then, she had arranged
		
00:20:16 --> 00:20:18
			for me to go to a program
		
00:20:18 --> 00:20:19
			in, Malaysia.
		
00:20:21 --> 00:20:21
			And
		
00:20:22 --> 00:20:24
			I canceled it because I'm I'm not gonna
		
00:20:24 --> 00:20:25
			leave her. Of course.
		
00:20:25 --> 00:20:27
			So she comes to her conscience, and she
		
00:20:27 --> 00:20:30
			goes, why aren't you in Malaysia right now?
		
00:20:30 --> 00:20:31
			And I was like, no. I I'm not
		
00:20:31 --> 00:20:33
			gonna go. I'm not gonna leave you. She
		
00:20:33 --> 00:20:35
			she gets really upset with me. She says,
		
00:20:35 --> 00:20:37
			I you have to promise me. I put
		
00:20:37 --> 00:20:40
			that together. You will go. You will not
		
00:20:40 --> 00:20:41
			stay behind. Go and come back.
		
00:20:42 --> 00:20:43
			But I will not be I'm not going
		
00:20:43 --> 00:20:45
			to eat anything if you don't go. She
		
00:20:45 --> 00:20:47
			starts she she goes big sister mode on
		
00:20:47 --> 00:20:49
			me. Right? So I was like,
		
00:20:50 --> 00:20:52
			I can't upset her in this state. Yeah.
		
00:20:52 --> 00:20:53
			Yeah. Okay. I'm going. I'm going.
		
00:20:54 --> 00:20:55
			So I go
		
00:20:55 --> 00:20:57
			to the programme, and
		
00:20:58 --> 00:20:59
			I still remember. I get the I I
		
00:20:59 --> 00:21:01
			come back from the program that night in
		
00:21:01 --> 00:21:02
			the hotel, and I get a call from
		
00:21:02 --> 00:21:05
			my my younger sister that she's gone.
		
00:21:06 --> 00:21:06
			And,
		
00:21:08 --> 00:21:10
			my entire family was in devastation. I was
		
00:21:10 --> 00:21:11
			frozen, and I, like,
		
00:21:12 --> 00:21:14
			I didn't know what to think. And I
		
00:21:14 --> 00:21:15
			I don't even know how I I don't
		
00:21:15 --> 00:21:17
			remember the flight. I don't remember anything. I
		
00:21:17 --> 00:21:17
			don't just
		
00:21:18 --> 00:21:19
			I got there, and
		
00:21:20 --> 00:21:22
			my family was in disarray. Nobody
		
00:21:23 --> 00:21:24
			this is the this is the first time
		
00:21:24 --> 00:21:26
			we're dealing with something like this in my
		
00:21:26 --> 00:21:27
			family. And she was my she was my
		
00:21:27 --> 00:21:30
			best friend. Wow. Like, I've had many friends
		
00:21:30 --> 00:21:32
			in my life, but nobody likes Saima. Like,
		
00:21:32 --> 00:21:34
			she was my best friend. And if you
		
00:21:34 --> 00:21:35
			if you saw us together, you wouldn't think
		
00:21:35 --> 00:21:36
			we're siblings.
		
00:21:38 --> 00:21:40
			We're 2 different worlds, but she was my
		
00:21:40 --> 00:21:41
			absolute best friend.
		
00:21:43 --> 00:21:44
			And him.
		
00:21:44 --> 00:21:47
			And him. And you know, it's not an
		
00:21:47 --> 00:21:48
			easy thing to,
		
00:21:49 --> 00:21:51
			to deal with, especially the whole part you
		
00:21:51 --> 00:21:53
			said, you know, like, okay. She's she's drinking
		
00:21:53 --> 00:21:56
			now. She's eating now. It's gonna it's gonna
		
00:21:56 --> 00:21:57
			get better. We used to eat we used
		
00:21:57 --> 00:21:59
			we used to dream for that. Yeah. But
		
00:21:59 --> 00:22:01
			there was actually nothing. Yeah. There was nothing.
		
00:22:01 --> 00:22:04
			Because we had the from the 3 weeks
		
00:22:04 --> 00:22:05
			that we were sleeping in the hospital. Yeah.
		
00:22:05 --> 00:22:07
			Which you shouldn't be sleeping in a critical
		
00:22:07 --> 00:22:09
			care unit, but they they found out that
		
00:22:09 --> 00:22:10
			we're very emotional.
		
00:22:10 --> 00:22:12
			So they've done a
		
00:22:12 --> 00:22:13
			few switches. But
		
00:22:13 --> 00:22:16
			we've seen at least 6 or 7 deaths.
		
00:22:16 --> 00:22:18
			Families coming in. My sister's about to die.
		
00:22:18 --> 00:22:20
			She dies. Move on. We've seen so many
		
00:22:20 --> 00:22:22
			patients coming in and out and Sahib is
		
00:22:22 --> 00:22:24
			still there. Right. And one of the patients
		
00:22:24 --> 00:22:25
			was like, oh, my sister is moving her
		
00:22:25 --> 00:22:27
			right hand. Or I wish
		
00:22:28 --> 00:22:30
			Sahib opened his eyes. I wish Sahib and
		
00:22:30 --> 00:22:32
			I think they were giving him some,
		
00:22:33 --> 00:22:34
			medicine where
		
00:22:34 --> 00:22:36
			and it was only a reflex from his
		
00:22:36 --> 00:22:38
			eyes, and his eyes would would open. I
		
00:22:38 --> 00:22:39
			was like, oh, Suhaib's listening to us. He's
		
00:22:39 --> 00:22:42
			reacting. He's reacting. And then the doctor you
		
00:22:42 --> 00:22:43
			know, the doctors were telling us, no. This
		
00:22:43 --> 00:22:45
			is only a reflex from the eyes. I
		
00:22:45 --> 00:22:46
			was like, no. No. No. They don't know
		
00:22:46 --> 00:22:47
			what we know. We know we can hear
		
00:22:47 --> 00:22:49
			us. The soul can hear us any bit
		
00:22:49 --> 00:22:51
			of a hope that there was. So after
		
00:22:52 --> 00:22:54
			after he was gone Yeah.
		
00:22:55 --> 00:22:55
			How did you
		
00:22:56 --> 00:22:56
			feel?
		
00:22:57 --> 00:22:59
			How did you deal with
		
00:22:59 --> 00:23:00
			all of that experience?
		
00:23:02 --> 00:23:03
			Allah here.
		
00:23:05 --> 00:23:06
			I didn't know how to deal with it,
		
00:23:06 --> 00:23:07
			to be honest. Yeah?
		
00:23:10 --> 00:23:11
			He was one of the guys that
		
00:23:11 --> 00:23:13
			whenever there's nothing there or there's nothing or
		
00:23:13 --> 00:23:16
			no plans, Saeb. Yo, Saeb, you wanna
		
00:23:16 --> 00:23:17
			go?
		
00:23:17 --> 00:23:18
			Dad's gone.
		
00:23:19 --> 00:23:20
			What do I do now?
		
00:23:20 --> 00:23:20
			Yeah.
		
00:23:22 --> 00:23:24
			Who's gonna join me in my swimming?
		
00:23:27 --> 00:23:28
			How are we getting Like a it's such
		
00:23:28 --> 00:23:30
			a part of your life. It's an extension
		
00:23:30 --> 00:23:32
			of yourself almost, you know? I didn't know
		
00:23:32 --> 00:23:34
			what to do. I bought one One of
		
00:23:34 --> 00:23:36
			the things I used to always remember is
		
00:23:36 --> 00:23:38
			when the prophet, salallahu alayhi wasallam, lost his
		
00:23:38 --> 00:23:38
			son, Ibrahim.
		
00:23:39 --> 00:23:39
			Yeah.
		
00:23:48 --> 00:23:49
			Of course, like,
		
00:23:49 --> 00:23:50
			I
		
00:23:51 --> 00:23:52
			was actually on social media and I was
		
00:23:52 --> 00:23:53
			just,
		
00:23:53 --> 00:23:55
			like I always tell this to to the
		
00:23:55 --> 00:23:57
			brothers beside me,
		
00:23:57 --> 00:23:59
			like if it wasn't for Islam,
		
00:23:59 --> 00:24:01
			I would have lost it. I would have
		
00:24:01 --> 00:24:02
			gone crazy. That's the only thing that was
		
00:24:02 --> 00:24:04
			holding me back. Allah
		
00:24:05 --> 00:24:07
			is testing me. Allah tests you based on
		
00:24:07 --> 00:24:09
			the first salamah, the first hit. You can't
		
00:24:09 --> 00:24:11
			lose yourself in the first hit and then
		
00:24:11 --> 00:24:12
			be like, oh, yeah. Allah
		
00:24:12 --> 00:24:14
			is testing me. You failed.
		
00:24:14 --> 00:24:17
			Allah tested you on that first salamah. What
		
00:24:17 --> 00:24:18
			are you going to do?
		
00:24:20 --> 00:24:21
			And as soon as that hit me where?
		
00:24:21 --> 00:24:23
			So had it not been for Islam, what
		
00:24:23 --> 00:24:24
			would have happened?
		
00:24:25 --> 00:24:27
			You know, you look up families here without
		
00:24:27 --> 00:24:30
			Islam, and the first thing they result to
		
00:24:30 --> 00:24:30
			was
		
00:24:30 --> 00:24:33
			alcohol. Let me forget about it. Drugs. Let
		
00:24:33 --> 00:24:35
			me forget about it. Let me do this.
		
00:24:36 --> 00:24:37
			And
		
00:24:38 --> 00:24:39
			Islam holds you back. Yeah.
		
00:24:40 --> 00:24:42
			Yeah. Akhan is better for you. You know,
		
00:24:42 --> 00:24:44
			like, I was thinking about this conversation and
		
00:24:44 --> 00:24:45
			like,
		
00:24:46 --> 00:24:47
			the word for grief,
		
00:24:48 --> 00:24:50
			in the Quran there are a few. But
		
00:24:50 --> 00:24:51
			one of
		
00:24:51 --> 00:24:53
			them, one of the more intense words, huzun
		
00:24:53 --> 00:24:55
			is the common word for grief in the
		
00:24:55 --> 00:24:56
			Quran. But karb
		
00:24:57 --> 00:24:59
			is actually a much stronger word. Al karb
		
00:24:59 --> 00:25:01
			al a'adeem, for example.
		
00:25:01 --> 00:25:03
			And Allah uses that for
		
00:25:04 --> 00:25:05
			and he uses it in 3 contexts.
		
00:25:06 --> 00:25:08
			He uses it for Nuh alaihi salaam,
		
00:25:09 --> 00:25:09
			who
		
00:25:10 --> 00:25:12
			in his own way, for the longest time,
		
00:25:12 --> 00:25:13
			has false hope
		
00:25:13 --> 00:25:15
			that things are going to turn around for
		
00:25:15 --> 00:25:17
			his family. Right? But he's holding onto that
		
00:25:17 --> 00:25:18
			hope. And then every day that that hope
		
00:25:18 --> 00:25:20
			is not met is another,
		
00:25:21 --> 00:25:21
			you know, another
		
00:25:22 --> 00:25:25
			poke of pain, another stab, another stab, another
		
00:25:25 --> 00:25:26
			stab. It's not just when his son drowned.
		
00:25:27 --> 00:25:28
			Like, in a sense, his son was drowning
		
00:25:28 --> 00:25:30
			every day. You know, and he's dealing with
		
00:25:30 --> 00:25:33
			that. Allah uses garb for,
		
00:25:34 --> 00:25:36
			Musa and Harun and their nation.
		
00:25:37 --> 00:25:39
			And those are 3 different kinds of kirk.
		
00:25:40 --> 00:25:40
			Like
		
00:25:41 --> 00:25:41
			Musa
		
00:25:43 --> 00:25:44
			his entire life
		
00:25:44 --> 00:25:46
			of grief and the things he went through,
		
00:25:46 --> 00:25:47
			and Harun
		
00:25:47 --> 00:25:49
			as his brother and also a slave of
		
00:25:49 --> 00:25:51
			the Israelites. Right? And all the things that
		
00:25:51 --> 00:25:53
			they went through on all the atrocities that
		
00:25:53 --> 00:25:55
			they saw that they couldn't get out of.
		
00:25:56 --> 00:25:57
			And
		
00:25:57 --> 00:25:59
			but then the 3rd time,
		
00:25:59 --> 00:26:01
			Allah uses it and He says, min kulli
		
00:26:01 --> 00:26:03
			karbin, like Allah will rescue you
		
00:26:04 --> 00:26:06
			from all kinds of kerb. And it's interesting.
		
00:26:06 --> 00:26:09
			Allah uses the word tanjia, like rescue
		
00:26:10 --> 00:26:12
			with kerb. Like, it's not something
		
00:26:13 --> 00:26:15
			you can get out of yourself.
		
00:26:17 --> 00:26:19
			Like, this this kind of grief is not
		
00:26:19 --> 00:26:21
			something that a human being is capable of
		
00:26:21 --> 00:26:24
			overcoming on their own. It is something Allah
		
00:26:25 --> 00:26:27
			only Allah can rescue you from. You would
		
00:26:27 --> 00:26:29
			think rescue you from, like,
		
00:26:29 --> 00:26:32
			a deadly thing, a danger. Allah uses the
		
00:26:32 --> 00:26:34
			word rescue for this kind of and then
		
00:26:34 --> 00:26:36
			I I started wondering, what what does karab
		
00:26:36 --> 00:26:38
			actually come from? Because, you know, Arabic words,
		
00:26:38 --> 00:26:40
			they have this interesting origin. Right?
		
00:26:41 --> 00:26:43
			And karb alhamu shadeed, fine. That's the the
		
00:26:43 --> 00:26:46
			dictionary meaning is intense grief, but it actually,
		
00:26:47 --> 00:26:48
			was
		
00:26:48 --> 00:26:50
			used when you when you take the shovel
		
00:26:50 --> 00:26:52
			and you dig the inside of the earth
		
00:26:53 --> 00:26:54
			and you bring it out.
		
00:26:55 --> 00:26:57
			So the outside of the earth is tough,
		
00:26:57 --> 00:26:59
			but the inside is soft soil.
		
00:26:59 --> 00:27:02
			Right? When you dig in and you bring
		
00:27:02 --> 00:27:03
			the inner softness out
		
00:27:04 --> 00:27:07
			Yeah. That's actually karbul ard. Okay. And what
		
00:27:07 --> 00:27:09
			that means is there's emotions inside me. I
		
00:27:09 --> 00:27:11
			can handle myself. I have composure on the
		
00:27:11 --> 00:27:14
			outside, but something happened that cut me deep
		
00:27:14 --> 00:27:16
			and something deep and raw inside
		
00:27:17 --> 00:27:19
			was ripped out and pulled out of me.
		
00:27:19 --> 00:27:21
			Right? And that's one of the meanings of
		
00:27:21 --> 00:27:23
			Then it's it's used for the sun. Like
		
00:27:23 --> 00:27:25
			Karbo Shams says when the sun is drowning
		
00:27:25 --> 00:27:28
			or it's setting in the evening. Right. So
		
00:27:28 --> 00:27:30
			all of its brightness is going away. You
		
00:27:30 --> 00:27:31
			can feel
		
00:27:32 --> 00:27:33
			light going away
		
00:27:34 --> 00:27:35
			and slowly disappearing.
		
00:27:36 --> 00:27:38
			Right? This darkness is taking over you. The
		
00:27:38 --> 00:27:40
			feeling of darkness is taking over you.
		
00:27:40 --> 00:27:42
			Was used for like,
		
00:27:43 --> 00:27:45
			when a container is almost full.
		
00:27:46 --> 00:27:47
			And that's why the Ulema used the word
		
00:27:47 --> 00:27:51
			to describe grief that almost overwhelms you, like
		
00:27:51 --> 00:27:53
			it drowns you in itself.
		
00:27:53 --> 00:27:57
			You know, so it's so incredible. And finally,
		
00:27:57 --> 00:28:00
			was used for like raqdul ghhalif. Like, when
		
00:28:00 --> 00:28:01
			you tie a bucket, you have to tie
		
00:28:01 --> 00:28:03
			the rope really tight for the well.
		
00:28:04 --> 00:28:06
			That knot was actually called a Qarab.
		
00:28:07 --> 00:28:09
			And like, it's a grief
		
00:28:09 --> 00:28:12
			that binds you. Like you can't undo it.
		
00:28:12 --> 00:28:13
			You can't get away from it. It keeps
		
00:28:13 --> 00:28:16
			coming back. It keeps hitting you. And Allah
		
00:28:16 --> 00:28:18
			keeps Allah says something so profound here that
		
00:28:18 --> 00:28:20
			he's the only one who can rescue you
		
00:28:20 --> 00:28:22
			from it. Like, you know, of course, people
		
00:28:22 --> 00:28:24
			go through traumatic experiences. Right? And they go
		
00:28:24 --> 00:28:25
			through grief and they're like, how do I
		
00:28:25 --> 00:28:27
			get past this? How do I move on
		
00:28:27 --> 00:28:29
			from this? I keep having these thoughts. I
		
00:28:29 --> 00:28:30
			keep crying. And, you know, I've met people
		
00:28:30 --> 00:28:32
			that lost their mom and they say my
		
00:28:32 --> 00:28:33
			mom was my everything.
		
00:28:34 --> 00:28:36
			And it's been months, it's been years and
		
00:28:36 --> 00:28:37
			I cry like it just happened.
		
00:28:37 --> 00:28:39
			I can't get past it. And of course
		
00:28:39 --> 00:28:42
			we have the story of Yahuwah Alayhi Salaam
		
00:28:42 --> 00:28:42
			who
		
00:28:43 --> 00:28:46
			like, it's actually the hope that's killing him.
		
00:28:46 --> 00:28:47
			Like if he found out that Yusuf was
		
00:28:47 --> 00:28:49
			dead. Yeah. At least, you know, there's a
		
00:28:50 --> 00:28:50
			It's
		
00:28:51 --> 00:28:53
			closure. I can move on, but he doesn't
		
00:28:53 --> 00:28:54
			know what happened to him.
		
00:28:54 --> 00:28:56
			He doesn't know if he died peacefully or
		
00:28:56 --> 00:28:57
			he died a violent death or is still
		
00:28:57 --> 00:28:59
			being abused. He doesn't know anything.
		
00:28:59 --> 00:29:02
			It's just stabbing away at him all the
		
00:29:02 --> 00:29:03
			time. Mhmm. Right?
		
00:29:04 --> 00:29:06
			And and Allah then says the only one
		
00:29:06 --> 00:29:07
			who can rescue you. Some people will be
		
00:29:07 --> 00:29:10
			tested with longer periods of grief, some with
		
00:29:10 --> 00:29:12
			shorter periods of grief, but the only one
		
00:29:12 --> 00:29:13
			who can rescue you in the end is
		
00:29:13 --> 00:29:14
			Allah. Is Allah
		
00:29:15 --> 00:29:16
			Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala.
		
00:29:16 --> 00:29:18
			And people will people will run
		
00:29:19 --> 00:29:22
			to the club to escape their grief. Video
		
00:29:22 --> 00:29:22
			games,
		
00:29:23 --> 00:29:24
			binge watching TV,
		
00:29:25 --> 00:29:26
			drugs, alcohol.
		
00:29:26 --> 00:29:30
			Right? They'll Exactly. They'll start doing, you know,
		
00:29:30 --> 00:29:32
			thrill sports or whatever, you know, just to
		
00:29:32 --> 00:29:33
			escape
		
00:29:34 --> 00:29:34
			their grief.
		
00:29:35 --> 00:29:36
			And
		
00:29:36 --> 00:29:36
			literally
		
00:29:37 --> 00:29:39
			the term you use is escape, right? Escapism.
		
00:29:40 --> 00:29:42
			And Allah says there's no escape. The only
		
00:29:42 --> 00:29:42
			rescue
		
00:29:43 --> 00:29:43
			is Allah
		
00:29:44 --> 00:29:46
			Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. Like what an incredible,
		
00:29:47 --> 00:29:47
			you know,
		
00:29:48 --> 00:29:50
			powerful thing that Allah has given us that
		
00:29:50 --> 00:29:51
			in His words we can find,
		
00:29:53 --> 00:29:55
			we can, we can find relief Allah. You
		
00:29:55 --> 00:29:57
			know, the last thing I'll share with you
		
00:29:57 --> 00:29:58
			on this is like
		
00:29:58 --> 00:29:59
			Nuh
		
00:29:59 --> 00:30:02
			right? How long, how many years of grief?
		
00:30:02 --> 00:30:03
			And
		
00:30:04 --> 00:30:06
			Allah says about him, like
		
00:30:08 --> 00:30:09
			Nuh called on us
		
00:30:10 --> 00:30:13
			and how how beautiful, how amazing we are
		
00:30:14 --> 00:30:16
			as givers of a response. Meaning Allah says,
		
00:30:16 --> 00:30:18
			I'm the best giver of a response.
		
00:30:19 --> 00:30:19
			And then he says,
		
00:30:21 --> 00:30:24
			Then he says, we rescued him. Now the
		
00:30:24 --> 00:30:25
			critical question is,
		
00:30:26 --> 00:30:27
			if Allah is the best one to give
		
00:30:27 --> 00:30:28
			a response, how come he didn't give it
		
00:30:28 --> 00:30:29
			sooner?
		
00:30:30 --> 00:30:32
			Right? Like the best response would be the
		
00:30:32 --> 00:30:33
			moment I felt grief,
		
00:30:34 --> 00:30:36
			Allah solves it. And it's not like I'm
		
00:30:36 --> 00:30:38
			going to make any better dua than Noor
		
00:30:38 --> 00:30:40
			because it's kind of a prophet. So
		
00:30:41 --> 00:30:43
			I can't beat him in Ibadah. Exactly. So
		
00:30:43 --> 00:30:46
			and if he's making dua for 950 years
		
00:30:46 --> 00:30:48
			and Allah is not relieving his grief, and
		
00:30:48 --> 00:30:49
			then Allah says he's the best to respond.
		
00:30:50 --> 00:30:52
			The Ayah is teaching us that
		
00:30:53 --> 00:30:54
			the relief and the rescue,
		
00:30:55 --> 00:30:56
			it's not on our timetable.
		
00:30:57 --> 00:30:59
			You have to give yourself to
		
00:31:00 --> 00:31:02
			Allah and he, he will decide when the
		
00:31:02 --> 00:31:04
			relief will come. Exactly. You know,
		
00:31:04 --> 00:31:06
			it'll come for Musa's mother in a few
		
00:31:06 --> 00:31:09
			hours and she'll be reunited with Musa
		
00:31:09 --> 00:31:11
			and it'll come with,
		
00:31:11 --> 00:31:14
			Yaqub alaihis salaam after many years and he'll
		
00:31:14 --> 00:31:16
			be regularly reunited with Musa. And it will
		
00:31:16 --> 00:31:19
			take 9 50 years for Nuh alayhi salaam.
		
00:31:20 --> 00:31:22
			You always use the example of, like, all
		
00:31:22 --> 00:31:24
			we see is pixelated images. Allah subhanahu wa
		
00:31:24 --> 00:31:26
			ta'ala sees the full picture. That's correct. Yeah.
		
00:31:26 --> 00:31:28
			And that's Yeah. That's what it is. And
		
00:31:28 --> 00:31:29
			Subhanallah. One of the areas
		
00:31:32 --> 00:31:34
			Yeah. You think we've just created you uselessly.
		
00:31:34 --> 00:31:36
			Yes. You're not gonna come back to us.
		
00:31:36 --> 00:31:37
			So
		
00:31:37 --> 00:31:40
			this life is just, like, it's a test.
		
00:31:40 --> 00:31:43
			It's the nirma of Islam, man. Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah.
		
00:31:43 --> 00:31:45
			The blessing of having Allah's words
		
00:31:46 --> 00:31:47
			to help us get through
		
00:31:48 --> 00:31:51
			these really challenging times in our life, you
		
00:31:51 --> 00:31:51
			know.
		
00:31:52 --> 00:31:52
			And
		
00:31:53 --> 00:31:55
			just, just having the comfort of knowing
		
00:31:55 --> 00:31:56
			that
		
00:31:57 --> 00:31:58
			we have to do our best
		
00:31:59 --> 00:32:00
			to be able to be reunited
		
00:32:00 --> 00:32:02
			with the people that we love. Exactly. Right?
		
00:32:02 --> 00:32:03
			Because the
		
00:32:04 --> 00:32:06
			gathering is happy happening whether we like it
		
00:32:06 --> 00:32:09
			or not, it's coming. Yeah. But whether we're
		
00:32:09 --> 00:32:10
			gonna be united on the right side of
		
00:32:10 --> 00:32:12
			things on the wrong, that's still up to
		
00:32:12 --> 00:32:15
			us. Exactly. That's still, you know. So now
		
00:32:15 --> 00:32:16
			it becomes
		
00:32:16 --> 00:32:17
			when I lose a loved one, when you
		
00:32:17 --> 00:32:20
			lose a loved one, then our motivation to
		
00:32:21 --> 00:32:23
			get away from darkness and to run towards
		
00:32:23 --> 00:32:26
			Allah's light, like Exactly. That should become all
		
00:32:26 --> 00:32:27
			the more intense because
		
00:32:27 --> 00:32:29
			there's loved ones at the end of that
		
00:32:29 --> 00:32:31
			journey, not just for ourselves in our meeting
		
00:32:31 --> 00:32:32
			with Allah, but they're also there
		
00:32:33 --> 00:32:35
			and they're waiting for us too, you know?
		
00:32:35 --> 00:32:37
			Exactly. SubhanAllah. And like one of the critical
		
00:32:37 --> 00:32:39
			questions as well is like, what are you
		
00:32:39 --> 00:32:41
			gonna be known for after you pass away?
		
00:32:41 --> 00:32:42
			For
		
00:32:42 --> 00:32:44
			so Ibrahim Allah who is known for a
		
00:32:44 --> 00:32:46
			man of the masjid. The imam of the
		
00:32:46 --> 00:32:46
			masjid
		
00:32:47 --> 00:32:49
			has bears witness, but he never sees
		
00:32:50 --> 00:32:51
			a line of fajr without Suhayb.
		
00:32:52 --> 00:32:54
			It. And the people that are around him,
		
00:32:54 --> 00:32:55
			family, friends,
		
00:32:56 --> 00:32:57
			people that don't even know him. Like one
		
00:32:57 --> 00:32:59
			of the guys that he said he met
		
00:32:59 --> 00:33:00
			him for wallahi, he said he met him
		
00:33:00 --> 00:33:02
			for 10 minutes. This guy is from the
		
00:33:02 --> 00:33:04
			UK. He's met him for 10 minutes. The
		
00:33:04 --> 00:33:05
			conversation was suhayb.
		
00:33:06 --> 00:33:08
			And when he heard suhayb passed away, he
		
00:33:08 --> 00:33:08
			flew
		
00:33:08 --> 00:33:11
			from from the UK to Ireland to join
		
00:33:11 --> 00:33:12
			our group speaking about Suhayb. He said, oh,
		
00:33:12 --> 00:33:14
			Allah, I had this conversation with his brother
		
00:33:14 --> 00:33:16
			for 10 minutes, and he had a big
		
00:33:16 --> 00:33:18
			impact about me. I don't know what this
		
00:33:18 --> 00:33:19
			guy achieved. I don't know how it hit
		
00:33:19 --> 00:33:20
			me, but
		
00:33:20 --> 00:33:22
			your brother's something special. And some people are
		
00:33:22 --> 00:33:24
			just special to Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. And,
		
00:33:24 --> 00:33:27
			alhamdulillah, I till this day, I look up
		
00:33:27 --> 00:33:28
			to him like, how how am I gonna
		
00:33:28 --> 00:33:29
			beat this guy?
		
00:33:29 --> 00:33:31
			And he was known for a masjid. And,
		
00:33:32 --> 00:33:33
			we decided to
		
00:33:33 --> 00:33:36
			fundraise for a masjid and a quranic school
		
00:33:36 --> 00:33:38
			for him. Because he was a man that
		
00:33:38 --> 00:33:40
			was known for that. And it's only right
		
00:33:41 --> 00:33:42
			that we do something on, under his behalf
		
00:33:42 --> 00:33:44
			to carry on his legacy inshallah. Well, you
		
00:33:44 --> 00:33:46
			know how beautiful our religion, like death is
		
00:33:46 --> 00:33:46
			a tragedy
		
00:33:48 --> 00:33:50
			across the board in humanity. And for us,
		
00:33:50 --> 00:33:51
			death can be a means of celebrating the
		
00:33:51 --> 00:33:53
			good legacy of someone. And it could be
		
00:33:53 --> 00:33:54
			a means of carrying,
		
00:33:54 --> 00:33:56
			like, perpetuating a goodness
		
00:33:57 --> 00:33:59
			and even being jealous of the one who
		
00:33:59 --> 00:34:01
			passed in a good way.
		
00:34:01 --> 00:34:03
			Right? Like we're like
		
00:34:05 --> 00:34:06
			it is like they made it. May Allah
		
00:34:06 --> 00:34:09
			forgive him and grant him the highest levels
		
00:34:09 --> 00:34:10
			in Jannah, but it's
		
00:34:10 --> 00:34:12
			a beautiful truth that Allah has given us.
		
00:34:12 --> 00:34:15
			And the stronger we connect with Allah Subhanahu
		
00:34:15 --> 00:34:15
			Wa Ta'ala
		
00:34:16 --> 00:34:17
			and with the core of what we believe,
		
00:34:18 --> 00:34:21
			like the easier life becomes to navigate. Thanks
		
00:34:21 --> 00:34:23
			so much for sharing that with me.
		
00:34:23 --> 00:34:25
			I know it's a difficult experience to recall,
		
00:34:25 --> 00:34:26
			but
		
00:34:26 --> 00:34:28
			I appreciate it. And I think, inshallah, it
		
00:34:28 --> 00:34:29
			will benefit others who are going through
		
00:34:30 --> 00:34:32
			their own trials that Allah has given them.
		
00:34:32 --> 00:34:34
			You know? Allah is Saba. Yeah. Saba is
		
00:34:34 --> 00:34:36
			a, it's a light word. As soon as
		
00:34:36 --> 00:34:39
			you're afflicted with it, it carries a huge,
		
00:34:39 --> 00:34:40
			huge meaning behind it. Yeah. Alhamdulillah.
		
00:34:41 --> 00:34:42
			And your man of Sabr
		
00:34:43 --> 00:34:44
			give you good risk and make you a
		
00:34:44 --> 00:34:45
			good continuation
		
00:34:45 --> 00:34:47
			of the inspiration your friend gave you. Ameen
		
00:34:47 --> 00:34:50
			You Rabbis Allah to forgive your assistance and
		
00:34:50 --> 00:34:51
			grant to the highest level of judgment. Ameen
		
00:34:51 --> 00:34:53
			You Rabbis Allahum Ameen. Thanks so much for
		
00:34:53 --> 00:34:53
			sharing.