Nouman Ali Khan – Marriage in the Quran – The Only Story
AI: Summary ©
The transcript discusses the surprising story of a woman named Assy who married a technology company developer to one of the greatest developers in history. The woman was not allowed to drink water but eventually found a bottle and started drinking. The segment also touches on the struggles of men in Egypt during the pandemic and their behavior towards women. The importance of being a good person for one's life is emphasized, along with the need to make it easy for young children to get married and become better at their jobs. The speaker encourages parents to use the YouTube video about a difficult road to marriage to make learning the Quran easier.
AI: Summary ©
Allah is the Greatest, Allah is
the Greatest.
There is no deity worthy of worship except
Allah.
Allah says in his noble book, after I
say I seek refuge with Allah from the
accursed Satan.
And when he went to meet Midian, he
said, Perhaps my Lord will guide me to
the right way.
And when he entered the water of Midian,
he found on him a nation of people
drinking.
And he found beside him two women, both
naked.
And he said, What is the matter with
you?
They said, We do not drink until the
caretaker comes, and our father is a great
sheikh.
My Lord, open my heart and ease my
affair, and release the knot from my tongue,
so that my word may be understood.
And Allah, make us firm in death with
no deity worthy of worship except Allah.
And Allah, make us of those who believe
and do righteous deeds, and continue in truth,
and continue in patience.
Ameen, O Lord of the worlds.
In today's khutbah, inshallah, I'll be speaking to
you about a few ayat that belong to
Surat Al-Qasas.
Surat Al-Qasas is one of the many
surahs in which Allah tells the story of
Musa Alayhi Salaam.
And a unique part of his life is
mentioned in Surat Al-Qasas that's not mentioned
anywhere else in this way.
And that is the story of how Musa
Alayhi Salaam got married.
Now, there is no other prophet in the
Quran about whom we get the story of
how they got married.
Except Musa Alayhi Salaam.
That's it.
It's the only prophet.
And every story in the Quran has purpose.
Divine purpose.
Allah selectively chose these stories for our guidance.
So of all the stories, there are marriages
happening every day, and there are hundreds of
thousands of prophets in history.
And several dozen of them have been mentioned
in the Quran.
And none of their marriages are talked about
in the way that the marriage of Musa
Alayhi Salaam is talked about.
So the wisdom in that is that we
should be seeking wisdom about marriage itself from
this story.
Allah did not just tell us these stories
in vain or not just for interesting facts.
But every part of the story gives us
some principles, gives us some guidance.
And in these next less than 20 minutes,
I'm going to share with you some parts
of that story and some things we might
be able to learn from that story.
The first thing to note is that it's
a very unusual marriage.
What makes it unusual?
Musa Alayhi Salaam accidentally, he was trying to
stop a police officer from hurting someone, and
he got in the middle of the fight,
and he threw a punch a little too
hard, and the police officer died.
And I'm fast forwarding, now he is wanted
for murder in Egypt.
So he's considered a criminal, and the order
given to the police is shoot on sight.
They're not interested in arresting Musa Alayhi Salaam.
They are going to, if they find him,
they will kill him and ask questions later.
So that's the idea.
Now knowing that, one of his friends told
him, in the Quran we learned this, إِنَّ
الْمَلَأَ يَأْتَمِرُونَ بِكَ لِيَقْتُلُوكَ in the same surah,
Surat Al-Qasas, that the police chiefs have
already made a secret plan to kill you.
So don't turn yourself in to the police,
because the police have decided, there's not going
to be a trial, you're not going to
court, you're not going to jail, you're going
to be killed.
They will kill you.
So he runs away.
فَخَرَجَ مِنْهَا خَائِفًا يَتَرَقَّبُ He runs away from
Egypt.
He runs away from Egypt into the desert.
And in the desert, there are no roads.
There's no way you know where you're going.
But Allah guided him, and Allah says, وَلَمَّا
تَوَجَّهَتِ الْقَاءَ مَدِيًّا When his face turned exactly
in the direction of Madian, قَالَ عَسَىٰ رَبِّي
أَن يَهْدِيَنِي سَوَاءَ السَّبِيلِ He said, maybe, hopefully,
my Rabb will guide me to the most
straight path.
He doesn't even know that he's facing Madian.
Madian is many, many, many days, maybe weeks
of travel away.
But he just turned his face in a
certain direction, and Allah just put in his
heart to make this dua, and he went
in that direction.
Now you know something about the desert, if
you go one degree off, you might end
up making a giant circle.
You end up where you started.
You have no idea if you're going the
right way or not.
And yet somehow he finally reaches, and Allah
describes, وَلَمَّا وَرَدَ مَا أَمَدِيًّا So the background
that I want to emphasize, is that Musa
A.S. is number one wanted criminal right
now in Egypt.
And if you find him, you better tell
the authorities.
So he escaped the world's biggest superpower right
now.
Two, he's homeless.
He has no job, he has no money,
he has no other food, nothing.
And he reaches this lake near Madian, and
he finally finds a rock or a tree,
and he sits under the tree to relax.
And when he relaxes, he sees people are
bringing their sheep, and their goats, and their
cows, and they're giving their animals water.
Obviously it's the desert, so very few places
that have water, they're going to bring their
animals to give them water.
And he's watching this scene.
So he says, Allah A.S. describes, وَلَمَّا
وَرَدَ مَا أَمَدِيًّا وَجَدَ عَلَيْهِ أُمَّةً مِّنَ النَّاسِ
يَسْقُونَ When he reached the waters of Madian,
he saw a group of people, they were
giving their animals water.
And then he says, وَوَجَدَ مِّن دُونِهِ إِمْرَأَتَيْنِ
تَذُودَانِ He saw two women far away, and
they were pulling on their animals.
Their animals want to drink, and the girls
are not letting them drink.
So all the men are giving their animals
food, drinking, and the two women are pulling
their animals back, but the goat wants to
drink, and is fighting with the two girls.
So he leaves the shade, and he went
up to them and said, مَا خَطْبُكُمَا What's
wrong with both of you?
What's your story?
Why are you doing this?
And so they were tough, and they responded
to him.
They said, لَا نَسْقِي حَتَّى يُسْتِرْ أَرْبِعَا We're
not going to give our animals water until
all the other men and all their animals
are done.
We don't go down there, and we don't
want to be alongside these other men.
What is Allah telling us?
Those men were not very respectful towards women.
And if they go down there, they will
be inappropriate, and they will behave badly towards
them, they will harass them, they will say
things to them, behave a certain way.
They're protecting themselves by keeping themselves back until
those men are done, because they don't know
how to be around women.
Now Allah عز و جل is telling us
a story about women that are living in
a situation where it's very difficult for them
to earn a living.
They basically work in a farm, they take
care of animals, but they live in a
society that doesn't respect women.
And it's harder for them to make the
living than it is for the men.
They have to do twice, three times the
work because they have to hold the animals
back.
Musa عليه السلام sees this whole scene, he
grabs the animals, and he gets them food,
he gets them to drink.
And then he brings the animals back.
فَسَقَى لَهُمَا ثُمَّ تَوَلَّى لَوْلِلْهِ So he gave
both of those girls' animals the drink, brought
them back, and then he went back and
sat down in the shade.
And he says, قَالَ رَبِّ إِنِّي لِمَا أَنزَلْتَ
إِلَيَّ مِنْ رَبِّ فَقِيرٍ So he says, رَبِّ
إِنِّي لِمَا أَنزَلْتَ إِلَيَّ مِنْ خَيْرٍ فَقِيرٍ He
says, Ya Allah, whatever good you send my
way, I'm faqeer, I need it.
The word faqeer means two things.
Faqeer means someone who's bankrupt, someone who has
nothing.
Faqeer, faqr also means when your back is
broken.
If somebody put so much pressure on your
back that your back snapped, that means completely
helpless.
And what is Musa a.s. asking Allah?
He's telling Allah, Ya Allah, I have no
food, I have no money, I have no
job, I have no safety, I have nothing.
So whatever you give me, I will take
it.
I will not be picky.
I will not say, Well, yes, you gave
me this water, but I really like apple
juice.
So I'll wait until I get some apple.
He's not gonna have this kind of attitude.
Whatever Allah gives, you know in Arabic they
say, الرَّاشِي رَضِيَ بِمَا رَكِبِ The one who
is walking, he'll be happy with any ride.
If you're walking 30, 50, 70, 100 kilometers
and somebody offers you a bicycle, you're not
saying, no, no, no.
You have a BMW, we should talk.
I don't want your bicycle.
Whatever you get, you'll take it.
So he says, Ya Allah, whatever khayr you
bring to me, I will take it.
But the other meaning of this is also
important.
Musa A.S. felt guilty because he did
kill someone.
And he did escape.
And he knows a principle that we learn
in the Quran, إِنَّ الْحَسَنَاتُ يُذْهِبْنَا السَّيِّئَاتُ Good
deeds get rid of bad deeds.
So whatever other opportunity to do something good,
you give me, I will take that opportunity
also.
Meaning he just saw these two girls that
needed help, he just did some khayr.
And he came back and he sat down,
and now he's asking, Ya Allah, if there's
any other volunteer opportunity, anybody else I can
help?
Let me know, I need the good deeds.
So, رَبِّ إِنِّ لِمَا أَنزَلْتَ إِلَيَّ مِنْ خَيْرٍ
فَقِيلٌ From this we also learn, if you
think about this, that every opportunity to help
someone, because of the words, أَنزَلْتَ إِلَيَّ Any
opportunity to help someone was revealed by Allah.
In my life and in your life.
If somebody came in your life and you
could have helped them, that that was actually
something revealed by Allah, sent down from the
skies, as an opportunity for you and me.
And Allah is telling us, if someone like
Musa a.s. is faqeer, then you and
I are definitely more faqeer, for any good
deed.
The other thing here, that when he makes
this dua, I want you to go back
to what he said when he first left
Egypt.
He said, hopefully Allah will guide me, سَوَاءَ
السَّبِيلِ عَسَىٰ أَن يَحْدِيَنِ رَبِّي سَوَاءَ السَّبِيلِ Maybe
Allah will guide me to the straightest possible
path.
And what's beautiful is, the straightest possible path
led him to get married.
Like Allah is actually even describing the merits
and the beauty of getting married in the
story in the strange way.
But anyway, so he helps these girls and
he's sitting in the shade.
These girls go back home, because they only
came to the lake to feed their animals.
So they go back home.
But they go back home early, because usually
they wait for all the men to finish,
and then they go back home.
Now they show up home 5 hours early.
And their old father who cannot work anymore,
he says, basically the Qur'an doesn't tell
us, you can assume logically, why are you
home early?
What happened?
And they say, well there was this man,
he was very strong, he just took our
animals.
And these girls, they deal with men outside
all the time.
So when they talk about Musa a.s.,
they're telling their father, this was not like
other men.
His behavior was different.
He was not looking at us the way
other men look at us.
He wasn't talking to us like other men
talk to us.
He didn't help us and he followed us
home or he was staring, nothing.
He just went back under the shade and
he just disappeared.
And the father is very intelligent.
He knows that he sends these girls out
everyday for work in a corrupt society.
And if you're living in a corrupt society,
finding a good husband for your daughter can
be very difficult.
You don't know who's who.
Everybody is bad out there.
And you want to find a good match
for your daughter.
So he, even when he hears this description
from his daughters, he realizes this is a
good man.
In his head, he's already got a plan.
And the father understands his daughter.
So the way she's talking about him, he
can tell she liked his character also.
So what does he do?
He sends one of them back to get
him.
Now if I'm a father and I have
two daughters and I'm going to go get
a man, it's safer to send two daughters.
Doesn't it make sense?
Send both girls.
But we find in the Quran, وَجَاءَتْ فَجَاءَتْ
إِحْدَاهُمَا تَمْشِي عَلَىٰ اسْتِحْيَةٍ He said one of
them.
And she came walking shyly.
She came walking shyly.
She's shy because she's alone and she's nervous.
Perhaps she's also shy because her father sent
something, she kind of likes him.
And it's a final test for her.
He already puts tawakkul in Allah when he
puts her outside everyday.
So he's already in this situation.
He trusts his daughter.
He trusts his daughter.
So he sends her out and he says,
bring this man.
فَجَاءَتْ إِحْدَاهُمَا تَمْشِي عَلَىٰ اسْتِحْيَةٍ Now when Musa
a.s. sees this girl again, he's like,
what do you want?
You need more help?
Why are you here?
So she feels shy and she says, إِنَّ
أَبِي يَدْعُوكَ So she makes sure he understands.
No, no, no, I'm not interested.
My father is calling you.
إِنَّ أَبِي يَدْعُوكَ لِيَجْزِيَكَ أَجْرَ مَا سَقَيْتَ لَنَا
So he can pay you for what you
gave us, for the help you gave us.
He wants to pay you.
Now the simple question is, did Musa a
.s. do this for the sake of Allah?
Or did he do this to make money?
He did it as an act of ibadah.
That's what he did.
His niyyah was for Allah.
But this woman comes and says, my father
wants to pay you for your work.
Musa a.s. could just turn around and
say, جَزَاكِ اللَّهُ خَيْرًا But I did that
في سبيل الله I don't want anything from
this dunya.
Thank you so much.
I'm going to go back and make dua
to Allah.
Because I did it for the niyyah of
ibadah.
That's it.
But Musa a.s. says, sure, let's go
get paid.
They go.
So why does he accept it?
Why?
Because Allah is teaching us how to understand
dua.
When Musa a.s. said to Allah, Whatever
good you send my way, my back is
broken.
I will not be picky.
And when this woman comes and says, my
father would like to pay you.
He understands Allah just answered his dua.
He doesn't need to be more picky.
He doesn't need to be more Islamic than
Islam.
Not saying, this is for the sake of
Allah.
I don't want anything dunya.
Yes, I need dunya.
I just asked Allah for some dunya.
So he goes.
And when he goes to the father, he
tells the father.
The father asked him, what are you doing
here young man?
I've never seen you before.
They have a conversation.
And the two girls are also listening from
the side.
And he says, فَلَمَّا جَأَهُ وَقَصَّ عَلَيْهِ الْقَصَصِ
When he came to him, he told him
the whole story.
What's the whole story?
I was born in Egypt.
I was raised in the palace.
I accidentally killed someone.
I'm wanted for murder.
I escaped the country.
I'm a fugitive.
I'm an illegal alien.
I don't have a visa here.
I don't have any citizenship here.
I have no job here.
I have no money.
I'm bankrupt.
And here I am.
So now the father knows that this young
man, he's a good guy.
He's a good young man.
He's honest.
But the world's biggest military wants to kill
him.
And he's homeless.
And he's bankrupt.
And all of this.
And the girl calls the father.
The girl says, يَا أَبَتِي اِسْتَأْجِرْهُ Dad, I
love you.
Give him a job.
Dad, give him...
She says...
The girl says to the father, Give him
a job.
The father understood.
If he gives him a job, there are
two young girls in the house and this
young man in the house.
You can't give him a job.
This doesn't work.
So she is speaking, Kinaya.
She's speaking indirectly.
Give him a job means, Can you marry
me to him?
I know other men outside.
They're not good like this man.
I like this man.
I like him enough.
I trust him enough that he can work
in this house.
Remember, they don't even trust men enough that
they can go to the same lake.
Remember that?
But she trusts this man enough that he
can work in this house.
And she says to her father, We can
hire him.
He can work for us.
The father understood the girl.
And he goes to Musa a.s. إِنِّي
أُرِيدُ أَن أُنكِحَ إِحْدَ بْنَتَيِّهَتَيْنِ I want...
that I want to marry one of my
two girls to you.
Now, think about the marriage proposal.
This young man came and said, I am
illegal.
I'm wanted.
I have a criminal record.
Wanted for murder.
I don't have a job.
And the father says after five minutes, Yeah,
I think you should marry my daughter.
It's a good idea.
عَلَىٰ أَن تَأْجُرَنِي ثَمَنِيَ حِجَاءٍ And he says,
the father says, But you have to work
for me for eight years.
وَإِنَّ تُمَمْتَ عَشْرًا فَمِنْ عِنْدِكَ And if you
want to work for ten years, up to
you.
You have the choice.
You have to work eight years or ten.
Now, look at the genius and the wisdom
of the father.
This is a good man.
And a good man is hard to find.
But you know what?
If the man doesn't have the degree you
wanted, he doesn't have the job you wanted,
he doesn't have the papers you wanted, et
cetera, et cetera.
But he's a good man.
That much you know now.
One hundred percent, that's a good man.
Then all the other things can come from
Allah.
Goodness, I don't know if that will come
from the sky or not.
The character is there.
All the other things we can help him
with.
So when he says, you have to work
for me, he's not asking Musa for a
favor.
He's doing Musa a favor.
Now Musa has a job.
Now Musa a.s. is married to one
of the girls.
The father is also happy because one of
his girls is married.
Now they also have a protector in the
house.
Everybody benefits.
Everybody benefits.
But you can imagine if we were talking
about today's society, some Muslim neighbor, hey, so
I heard you're getting your daughter married.
Yeah, yeah.
Who are you getting her married to?
Oh, this guy, he's not from our village.
You're getting her married to an outsider?
Must be a VIP, some important guy.
Oh no, he's just homeless.
Oh my God, what are you doing?
You have such a wonderful daughter, you're ruining
her future.
Why are you getting her married to this
person?
And people talk, don't they?
People talk.
And when people start talking, people say, I
don't know, this marriage is a good guy,
but people are doing too much talking.
I don't think we can go forward with
this marriage.
Right?
This is what we do in our societies.
This is what we do in our cultures.
If we don't make marriage easy, and if
we don't make marriage based on the right
reasons, the right reasons are character, the right
reasons are integrity, the right reasons are honesty.
If we don't make marriage easy, and if
we stop listening to our daughters, because we
listen to everybody else, everybody talks, the uncles
are talking, the cousins are talking, the in
-laws are talking, the neighbors are talking, everybody
is talking.
But the one person the father needs to
be listening to is his daughter.
That's the one person, she's an adult.
And the one thing the father needs to
be checking is the character.
And he tested the character too, he sent
his daughter alone, he tested.
And he heard the whole story, and nobody
comes to the house and says, by the
way, you know, and tells the story that
Musa A.S. tells in order to impress
someone.
That's not an impressive story.
That's a pretty good reason to say, you
know what, I think you should leave.
So he's seen his honesty first hand.
And so when you find that, then everybody's
noise can stay, you make the right decision
for your son and your daughter.
That's the teaching Allah has given us.
That's the beauty Allah has given us in
this surah.
And so with that, what I want to
sort of emphasize is when we make the
door to nikah difficult, when we make the
road to getting married difficult, then the road
to haram becomes easier and easier and easier.
And we cannot blame non-Muslim society, kafir
society, fitna, the media, the internet, TikTok, this,
that.
You can't blame anyone else.
Their job is to make the haram easy.
Our job, Muslims, our job is to make
the halal easy.
So when we make the halal difficult, then
we don't get to blame anybody else.
We have to blame ourselves.
Young men have to become more serious about
work and about integrity and about character.
Young women have to think more about what
kind of husbands they should be looking for.
Fathers, in many cultures, it's hard for fathers
to have conversations with their daughters about marriage.
They just say, oh, he's got a good
job.
Just do it.
Yeah, but he's smoking weed.
He's doing that.
That's okay.
I know the family.
He'll become better after he has a baby.
This kind of nonsense.
This kind of idiocy.
The Quran came to save us from these
kinds of behaviors.
So my dua for all of you, especially
those of us that are fathers, that our
children are able to find good spouses, and
Allah makes us a means by which their
journey towards marriage is made easy and it's
not made difficult.
And they can have good, normal, honest conversations
with us about what they do want and
about what they don't want so that we
don't force them or pressure them into situations
that will create fitna for the entire community.
بارك الله لي ولكم في القرآن الحكيم ونفعني
وإياكم بالآيات والذكر الحكيم I hope you guys
enjoyed that video clip.
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