Final Episode
Nouman Ali Khan – Commanding Good & Forbidding Evil #3
AI: Summary ©
The concept of commanding Good and Forbidding Abuse is discussed, emphasizing the importance of knowing one's words and actions in order to correct others. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of sharing words of Islam with others and embracing one's own values. The speaker also discusses the misuse of the word "by definition" and the consequences of it, including avoiding embarrassment and confusion. embracing one's own values is also emphasized, but it is also a bad thing. The speaker encourages people to find their way out of darkness and make mistakes, but acknowledge their mistake and find their way back.
AI: Summary ©
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suddenly we are silly Emily. Emily, Sania Callie is a bit naughty La ilaha illallah wa la Medina, Mina Latina de la Sally had, what I was hoping happy, whatever sub sub i mean, yeah, but I mean, today, I want to complete the brief comments I wanted to make about the concept of commanding good and forbidding evil. And the art of reference today are, again, 110. And maybe a little bit of 111 of
this passage, actually, in the Quran, it's this, this towards the end of this passage, is actually probably the most comprehensive passage on the subject of command and good and forbidding evil. That theme and the concept is reiterated over and over again. And it's echoed over and over again in this passage. But anyway, in previous clip, as I've talked to you folks about the mannerisms of commanding good and forbidding evil, I've talked to you about how somebody could actually think that they're doing so but actually serving their own ego. But we also talked a little bit about what is it that we come in to, and how if there are things that are smaller, and that are, you don't even
understand the technicalities of them, the average Muslim may not be qualified to know the technical details of you know, a thick and things like that. That's not what they don't take their opinion, and then impose that on everybody else and say, This is commanding and good, commanding the good and forbidding evil, but rather, it's about values. And there are certain values that are timeless in our religion, they have been there, they've always been there, they're always going to be there. And these are some of the values that were given even to the people before us. So it's not just us who has them, they were given to the people before us. And then they were reinforced and confirmed with
what Allah gave to us. So it's actually a continuous thing that started much before us and is carried on with us. This is why it's called the letter A b comma, Rahim, the religion of your father Ibrahim. Now, last time, I talked to you about commanding good, and I wanted to actually take some time today to talk about the word commanding.
And then even, we talked about my roof before, but today I want to talk about I'm gonna I'm gonna switch over to the side that talks about forbidding evil. So the first thing I want to bring up about the concept of ama in Arabic, is that it's actually not just a command. It's interestingly enough, in the in ancient poetry and other references. The word the same word was used when you tell somebody to do something, which is a command. Also use when you advise someone to do something, which is totally different from a command. When you command someone, you come from a position of authority. When you advise someone, you may even be requesting them, you may be counseling them, you
don't come top down, you're actually on the same footing, you understand. So in life, there are some people that are under our authority. There are for example, our children are under our authority, for example, right? And those, I can tell
a certain age, at least I can command them to do certain things, I can instruct them. But then there are others in life, friends, other family members, etc. Where we're no longer in a position to command or we never were, all we can do is what all we can do is advise, right. And so, it's important to understand that because sometimes what we don't get is that since Allah said command, we can take an authoritative tone with whoever we talk to, and start talking to them about what Allah says this and you better know, and start coming down with a hammer, and not having understood that there's every every situation has a place. And what's remarkable in the Quran is that even the
people we have authority over, for example, a father has authority over his son, and he can tell his son what to do. And what you find in the Quran is the example of one of the Allahu anhu giving advice to his son. But instead of telling him what to do, he first starts with Yabu Nia and then says not to Shrek Billa, he said, My beloved son, my little son, in other words, he used a term of endearment. First you acts, you soften the heart by expressing the love that you have. And it also tells you the advice that's about to be given is not coming from a place of anger, or frustration, or it's not coming from a negative emotion. It's actually rooted in love. It's because I love you
that I wanted to tell you this. And then he says something so serious, he says not to predict the law. Don't do sherco de la. Right. And it's important that you understand the flip side of that too, because human beings by nature are defensive. If I went to somebody and said, Hey, I love you don't do shark or they do. Excuse me, you think I do shake
you think I got it the problem. You're gonna believe in a law, or even a some kind of father and say, Thanks a lot, dad. obvious. I did go to Sunday school, turn to shake. Yeah, that's the wisdom father. You see, you can dismiss good advice, and not understand where it's coming from. And perhaps you don't you know, for example, even just thinking about Chuck for a moment, even though we're not discussing those items. It's very easy to understand that shift isn't just the worship of idols, shift can take many forms. It can be like the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam described like a blank black end, on a dark night on a rock on a black rock, you can't see it, the ship can creep
into your thought process in many different ways. And because Allah has so many names, right? Allah has an each one of those names of Allah has an effect on the relationship I have with Allah, I can actually do ship with any one of those names, for example, I can do that to give you an example of that.
Last name is the one in control. Right, the one in complete control. And sometimes I can make decisions in life, absent of the thought that Allah is the one actually in charge. And I think I can cross those lines and follow other rules or tape make other plans. That is good. That's gonna get me where I want to get assuming that Allah has nothing to say about that or do about that.
Great, so and that moment, I don't actually hold the view in my heart that in Allah Allah Khalifa in Cadiz, I don't hold that view. So you know, and similarly, when you start when you and I start feeling entitled, when you and I start feeling like we deserve, we deserve, we deserve, like, even something small, like you open up your fridge and your favorite drink, isn't there, come on. Right for that moment, when it's not there. We forget that there are so many who don't even have clean drinking water. We don't we forget that. But more importantly, whatever we do have inside that fridge, that's actually a gift given from Allah. Because he's the hub, he's always up. He's the
provider. So in those moments, we can actually start thinking or losing sight of a name of the law. The other relationship we have a lot with a lot of the other. He's telling me Sunday, mindful of a lie in everything that you do. He's not just saying don't bow down to idols you understand. In other words, the son will have to engage in some thought to appreciate what's being said.
What I'm coming back to then is when you advise, there's two bits of ironically advice, the advice to the one giving advice to the one receiving the advice of the one giving is don't jump the gun and assume I know what you're gonna say, Okay. I already know what you're gonna say. Thanks. Thanks for your advice. You already put up a wall and you don't want to hear what's being said. And you don't want to think about it because you assume that the person is coming from a place of judgment, not a place of love, not a place of sincere advice. For the advisor for the one who's going to share some advice, a few bits of advice for them are first and foremost, you should know who you're talking to.
I mean, most of the time, we're not going to go give advice to strange
You're going to talk to your sister, your brother, your cousin, your uncle, your, your husband, your wife, your mother, your father. These are people you've spent lifetimes with. These are people that you live with. These are people you know them, you understand and you've had, that's the truth of it, you've had a million arguments with them. You've had a lot of conversations that started normal, and then they fell off a cliff, you had those conversations already, you're smart enough to know that if I say it in this way, it's gonna lead to something really bad. Because you can almost you can, many of you can actually play out the entire conversation in your head before having the
conversation. So think carefully and say, What can I say, that doesn't lead down that road, I still want to say this advice. But maybe I want to cushion this advice, or capture this advice, with love with care with concern, yada, yada. And then give that advice. You know, go back to this, this idea, again, that I'm trying to share with you, you know, the best of all nations brought out for the benefit of humanity, Linda's for people. We start thinking this is only about Dawa to non Muslims, you can't talk about balota non Muslims and sharing the message of Islam with others, when we're not even good at sharing basic advice with each other. That's the that's the next step. When somebody
comes into this on our Islam as the best, you know, I don't see you guys being the best to each other, how is this the best?
The best and brochures? You only the best in like dhaba videos, that's that's where you're the best? How are you the best and the way you talk to each other? How are you in the best in the way you advise each other. So that's part of what I wanted to highlight in
that you give advice to something. And by the way, it's remarkable that roof is being used. And by that one of the meanings of the word of mouth, in addition to what I already shared with you before is that which is known
advising to that which is known. Now that's interesting, because if it's already known, why do you have to advise it?
Why do you have to tell someone because they should already know, that's actually a fundamental principle of religion. Because for that kid remind, you can't remind someone of something they didn't know, you can only remind someone of something they already knew. You can teach someone something new, you can inform someone of something new. But the word reminder is actually rooted in the idea that you already do it. But you lost sight of it, you became a little you ignored it a little, you know you, you didn't realize that at the time, or left your conscience, so it's being refreshed for you. The entire Quran is called reminder. Think about the just the word reminder what
that would mean. That means that just because someone's telling you something you've heard before, or I've heard before, my attitude is that men already heard this already, just from you already know this.
You know it here. But sometimes we need to know it all over again over here.
We need to see it. We heard it before, but our eyes get rusty. Our hearts get rusty. And when you're reminded the dust comes off. And so that you advise to get another religion is perfect. And the religion is beautiful. And the weight of the teachings of our profits or something are priceless and without flaw. But the way we share it can have plenty of flaws you understand. And the way we receive it can have plenty of flaws. And both the shipper and the receiver have to understand that they're dealing with something more sacred than each other's egos, have to put themselves aside. The book unlimited law here earlier, the word of Allah Supreme. The worst case scenario of this I'll
share with you is sometimes somebody misuses an IRA.
Or misuses a hadith to correct you.
Right? So there, it's sacred. It's the word of Allah. It's so it's the authentic words of the Prophet salallahu alaihe salam, but they they misused it, and you know better already, you know that they're misusing it. Yeah. And we use that to do some honorable Madoff and the hallmark of SmackDown on you. Right, that's what they're, that's what they're doing.
And you have an opportunity to say, you know what, you're misusing this Hadeeth you're misusing this IRA. And you know what, this is what it actually means. So you need to check your place.
If somebody wants to, you know, and the devil can contact any of you and myself in the middle of such a conversation, if somebody tries to come and tell me, you know what the law says. I could go in my hand and say, You know what, I got a lot of YouTube videos. I can call on you right now to
you want to go you want to Islam. Yeah, I could have slapped me right back. Well, I'm pretty good at Islamic back. But this isn't a ping pong match. This isn't you smack that harder than smack it back harder. Because now what are you doing? You're using the word of Allah, or he use this one. I'm going to use that one. And he says,
I'm going to use this one and now you are actually using the word have a lot of fun.
Do your own ego.
It's just the thing to use to win an argument, you understand? So who's higher now? Is the word of a law higher? Or is my need to win an argument higher is no skinny thing is not a crime against the laws word when Allah says the rate of allies in the highest place. So in such a situation happens, and somebody misuses a hoodie misuses an IRA and slaps it on your face. What are you supposed to? Do you always see at that time as someone being obnoxious and arrogant and abusive and ignorant, actually, right? That's all you see at the moment. But as a slave of Allah, what do you need to see, we need to see that what came out of their mouth is the word of Allah.
And I am having I'm not having an argument with the word of Allah. I'm having an argument with this person, you understand? So right now because they chose to use the word of Allah, I'm just going to become quiet.
I'm not going to respond. I'm not going to correct it right now. Because I'm not talking to someone who wants to reason I want I'm talking to someone who wants to win.
And there's no reason to, to disregard or do a disservice to the Quran to the words of the prophets. I said, I'm by bringing using that in this conversation, or allowing them to continue to use it in this conversation, I will do it. I will not do it. I will leave the weight of a lot right now out of it. This is part of that group, by the way. You have to stop yourself from doing something. He what you think is good. Let me know I want to correct him right now. No, that's not the time to correct them. You should know better, you should know the people you're arguing with. If you correct them, then they're gonna do Oh, thank you for this correction. I never understood that the feet of this
island this way. Finally, I understand jsoc Hello, hello.
That's what your mom's gonna do. That's what you're gonna do. That's what I was gonna do.
They're gonna turn around and come back even harder, is it right? You should know that you're paving the way if they said one thing that's out of line, now you're paving the way for them to say even worse,
and the angels are recording all of it. So you have to learn to defuse the situation. So you just just that you can't even say By the way, what you said is misuse. And I heard I heard, but I'm not gonna say anything. Because I'm so humble. That's not humility.
That's gotta be just in
myself. I won't say anything. And you know what that person might think. Here's the fun part, the person who were silent to now, they'll say, I got him good. Man, I dropped that I dropped that Hadees. And he was like, quiet. Yep, he got a slump. Good. And then over the telephone, you know what he was arguing me. And I told him was heavy. Or I told her this. And she was quiet after that, would you say nothing, once you're gonna say?
Well, she goes after that.
And in your head, because you were quiet, you're like, I can't let him have those points. This victory, they're gonna go back and report it to others. We're gonna tell everybody else they won this one. You won't have to lose some of them to gain your humility back with a law. Part of American mouth is understanding that allies, the one giving us this charge, that we don't use the word of a line this way. And this is why I advise over and over again, I don't get tired of saying it. That if you are having a personal disagreement with someone, and the conversation is getting heated, don't bring Islam into it.
Don't bring the sacred word into it. You can talk about it later. You can bring the words of the prophets I saw them, or Allah xojo later why? Because in the moment, if you say you know what that had, if you know what it says about people like you,
you don't have a message about what you just said, you know what Allah says about that? I'm very capable of doing that in an argument. Your true. You've been, you've heard enough lectures, you've read enough books. You can quote something from the provinces and the provinces will never do what you're doing right now. Because you know what he did not say, Oh, yeah, he wouldn't do what I'm doing. What about what you're doing? What about this?
This is again, drifting away. And in their head, you know, that the crazy thing is, when people do this ugly behavior, what's in their head, I just commanded the good and forbid forbade the evil.
This is evil in and of itself. We don't play with the religion like that. What what are the what are the consequences of playing with a religion like that? You know what it does? Over time, people. Originally a person resented you because they you were arguing with them.
But because you kept on using the religion, they no longer just resent you.
they resent the religion. And so every time a loss word is brought up, they get flashbacks of how they were slapped. And in the middle of those steps, they heard a loss words. So they are now dismissive and defensive against any words that come from Allah, because it just reminds them of the arguments they had with you and me.
And so we practically
Took someone's heart away from the word of Allah, what a crime that is committed crime. We gave them this, you know, a trigger, that the Quran now becomes a trigger for them.
When they hear I asked about parents, when they hear about inheritance when they hear about whatever has been involved, they get triggered, I don't want to hear this. I know these people use that.
Because they remember those arguments. And this is why, you know, one of the one of the tricks of shape on is z and Allahumma, shavon shavon beautifies their deeds for them. In other words, they think they're doing something good while they're doing the devil's bidding. And that's what I wanted to warn myself and all of you about when it comes to that little number, but then hone down. And then lastly, and I know I've taken quite a bit of time, but
what you what then homeowner and in Lincoln, you forbid evil and forbidding is actually not advising. It's actually hard. You know how I said, commanding is arranged you can advise all the way to command depending on the situation, right? But when it came to the word for forbidding it's not or advising against, no, it's forbidding, it's putting a stop to it, this is not going to stand. And when cut is something not recognized by the soul. Actually, I'm summarizing a lot of discourse behind the word one cup, uncut is to deny, and a lot put goodness inside of our nature. So one of the words for evil is evil is not something put in our nature. So the inside goodness of a human
being rejects it. And that which is rejected and unrecognized as good is called therefore mooncup.
So it's you know that it's a value that's evil, that's wrong, and that something is evil and wrong. You don't have to be politically correct about it. You just got to say that's evil. That's wrong. I know, hearing that it's wrong hurts your feelings. But it's still wrong.
You might feel like I'm judging you, I'm not judging you. You are this act is judged, not by me. But by a law. Your judgment is with a law. I can't judge you. You can't judge me. But the wrong that is actually wrong. That is actually evil, will never be bound to make you feel better. You can run that you can still speak in loving ways. But just because you speak nicely, doesn't mean you've been the truth. And that's an interesting trick of Chopin. Sometimes we'll put in a corner and we're made to add, we're asked a question that may be the answer to it is politically incorrect. But it's not something people want to hear. Because there's a narrative in society in which that answer is not
acceptable. What is Islam stance on homosexuality? so complicated question, but at the base of it, it's not complicated at all. A law stands against it.
There's no ambiguity in the Quran about it. There's no ambiguity in the prophets teachings about it. Someone lahardee who said them, it's been called it a fafi shot as something disgraceful. That's what he calls it. Something shames I didn't choose those words. He did. Now in order to protect someone's feelings, I say, but I'm not judging you. But I didn't. I wasn't asked to judge you. I was asked to. I was asked, What is the message of this?
What does he have to say about this? This is what he says.
Are you committing a shameless act? Are you committing an act of indecency? That's what he said. So when it comes to this issue, or any other issue, somebody will get offended? The truth is, someone will get offended. But you can't not say if you're asked, Is this an evil in a song? Is this considered acceptable? No, it's not what do you what do you mean it's not acceptable you hate those people? You want to kill a ListView a standard I said, I just said that's a that's an acceptable feel. But maybe there's maybe I can find a difference of opinion for you so you could feel better. Know when something's there is no difference of opinion. Facts are facts. chemists, coming from a
local optima Rubicam, tell them the truth comes from the monster from the chaff and you've been on my shelf, for whoever wants, they can just, they can believe it, whoever else they should, this belief
is not going to compromise what he says, I cannot speak I started this football, I cannot speak from a position of authority, right?
But Allah speaks to His slaves from a position of authority. And I don't have a right to be nice to someone and mess with his authority.
And then his words so you can feel better about yourself. So you don't have to feel judged. So I can't judge you that a law certainly can. And that's up to you. If you're asking. That doesn't mean I go around slapping people with a lot and say, You know what, you know what this is?
Again, coming back to what, how it works, what and how not everyone can do it.
values that we will always stand by, doesn't matter if it's politically correct or not, doesn't matter if it's acceptable to somebody else or not. And in a world where people carry all kinds of values, all kinds of crazy values, and then they expect everyone else to glorify them, then if they have no shame in glorifying whatever values they want, why are you and I so ashamed to glorify the values Alliance given us? Why?
Everybody has a right to be however they want except us. There was one thing that I felt, you know, the first time I
you know, this, I don't consider the Koofi a part of, you know, a mandate in the religion. There's a study behind it. Nobody's gonna study on but I will tell you a story. When I first became serious about my religion, I couldn't even grow a beard. But I felt like this is how I can show everybody that I'm Muslim. When I put this thing on and get on the subway in New York City, and I first time I was shaking in the inside, like, and somebody somebody bumped into me, excuse me, Muhammad. And I was like,
you know, it was a nerve wracking thing, that you visibly look Muslim, you know.
And because it's a symbol, right? But when I did that, before I did that, you know what it was when you go into a subway, I don't know how it is nowadays, because nobody on the subways knows, quarantine. But when you when you see people with all kinds of stuff, man, you see, rings, not those rings in places I didn't know you could put rings,
tattoos where I don't know where the face hands on the tattooed.
People are in all colors and shapes and sizes. People do with their hair people do with their bodies, what you would not imagine. And none of they're proud of it freedom of expression, right? To live a pride, they could dress however they want with pride. And I'm so ashamed to identify myself to visibly look Muslim, and they have no hesitation in being however they are.
And they're doing that to make themselves they're proud of themselves. And I'm not proud of my religion.
I'm not proud of my profit. I'm not proud of the word of Allah. I'm hesitating. Why don't they should even have an exhibition of me.
I
can ask the question, which of the two groups should feel more at ease, we should we should feel peace.
We should be more comfortable with themselves carrying themselves a certain way. So the thing is, when it comes to our values, you have to become comfortable with them. When it comes to the word of Allah, you have to become comfortable with it. And so I ended
up with the following the conclusion of this ayah was Amina kita, vena cava, how you alone, have the people of the book actually believed it would have been better for them.
What this is about believing and disbelieving, this is the same as it was about commanding the good and forbidding the evil. And unless he's had they believed that would have been better for them. Why? Because the abandoned this principle. They started changing the good and the evil to their liking. They started they stop speaking out against against certain evils. They started becoming more accepting of others kinds of sins, it's okay. It's all like, I don't want you, I want you to feel accepted in the end. Because that by the way, making someone feel accepted sounds like a really good thing. And it is a good thing. We accept all human beings, but we don't accept evil itself.
And even if someone is engaged in evil, accepting them, you know what that means? Let me help.
Let's understand where that came from. What did you go through that spiraled you down? Let's help you heal. Let's do that. But you know what that was the new acceptances, acceptances, you could do whatever, you know, evil that Allah says not to do. But I want to accept you so I still want to give you a hug and not talk about what you're doing wrong because you might feel bad. And I don't want to address what's actually happened. I'm saying going to the goodwill treat people like people nobody starts drinking because they just want to harm one day. They went through a bad divorce or they got they lost their job or they got diagnosed with a disease or something happened to them and they
decided one day that they just need to check out they went in the wrong direction but they're going through a lot emotionally before they went down that road. Isn't that true?
So when we if you want to help someone and accept them first understand the pain
understand what hurt them understand that they need someone that cares for them, which is what I started with when you enjoying good first you demonstrate your love and your care. But even as you care for them, and you think I'm a bad person because I drink
going to * because I drink right? How should I answer that? I'm even because I drink right? I mean, because I do I do sinner right? I'm evil because I do drugs right now.
You're not evil, but what that what you're doing is evil. That's just the truth. It is you should get away from it, it is harmful for you. And I can't tell you otherwise, it is wrong, but you shouldn't lose hope and mercy. You should try to find your way out of that darkness, the fact that you even say that yourself that you're doing that. And it's not something that's good for you. I didn't say that you said that. So there's something in you that already recognizes that it's a problem.
And I, that has given every one of us the strength to come out of darkness and he can bring us into light. He can do that. So let's find a way you'll get out of this. I know you will. Any human being who makes the intention to come out of darkness alone will not leave them abandoned. Why is it such a hard conversation to have? It's obviously
understands.
Now that's the wrong thing to say, alone understands. It's okay, keep people alone, understand your pain, alone understands how you can slip alone understand that you can make mistakes, every child of either makes mistakes. But the point is you must recognize your mistake and find your way back. That's the real conversation. So that's part of commanding the groom forbidding the evil and being accepting of people because the more people have tried to do now is to say that if you say the right thing, you're being judgmental, you're not being compassionate. You're not being understanding. You're not being merciful. As long as merciful. Be merciful. Yeah, you should be merciful and still
stand by the truth. You don't pick one or the other. Religion is both of those things. Some people want to be the just be the flag bearers for the truth while being ruthless. And the others want to be merciful by letting go of the truth. We don't get to pick between those two. Now allows us to truly make us an Omar commanding good and forbidding evil, and not allow us to fall into the traps that the people before us fell into and if we have fallen into them, that allows them to give us the commitment to his light that we come out of them. barakallahu li Welcome to the court and Hakeem when I finally we accompany it with the Kentucky
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