Navaid Aziz – How to Make the Most of Ramadan

Navaid Aziz
Share Page

AI: Summary ©

The importance of fasting, addressing one's intimate desires, finding a culture of fear, protecting oneself from shav lie, finding a way to incorporate the Prophet's teachings into one's daily lives, creating a "has" system, maximizing potential for-you, and setting goals for the month of Guinea. The importance of family and friendships, setting goals, and maximizing potential for-you is emphasized. The speaker also discusses the importance of setting up a buddy system for children to avoid missing opportunities and creating a "has" system for parents to pursue their potential.

AI: Summary ©

00:00:06 --> 00:00:50
			So our last session inshallah, we'll be discussing two things, the concept of fasting and what we're
meant to attain from fasting and then, you know, how should we be spending our time in Ramadan. So
when it comes to actual fasting Allah subhanaw taala. He tells us the objective behind fasting is
that we may attain taqwa, right quotevalet camassia mahkamah kuchibhotla Lena Min kubla Khan, Nan
Lacan Excuse me. So to attain taqwa. Now, when you look at how even this habit of the low unknown,
interpreted taqwa, those definitions that they have are very, very different from one another. But
they're also similar in terms of what the state of the individual is, once they've implemented those
		
00:00:50 --> 00:00:57
			definitions. So my preferred definition when it comes to taqwa is something that's found in the
tafsir of
		
00:00:58 --> 00:01:39
			AB Hatem. In sha Allah Allah Maron, when Allah subhanaw taala tells us yeah, even the Drina Amano
taco la Hakata Kati Morton 11 to Muslim on that Oh, who you believe have Taqwa of Allah subhanho wa
Taala, a taqwa that he is truly deserving of and do not die except in the state of Islam. Even Abby
hides them with his isnaad he narrates that our beloved masala de la Han who was asked, what does it
mean to have a taqwa of Allah subhana wa tada that he is truly deserving of and we must know that
they love and we responded with three things. He says that this is for the slave of Allah subhanho
wa Taala to remember Allah subhanho wa Taala so much that he never forgets Allah subhana wa tada and
		
00:01:39 --> 00:02:24
			it is to obey Allah subhanho wa Taala so much, that he never dis obeys Allah subhanho wa Taala. And
it is to show so much gratitude to Allah subhanho wa Taala that he is never ungrateful towards Allah
subhanho wa Taala. So a very heavy emphasis on remembering Allah subhanaw taala obeying Allah
subhanaw taala and being grateful to Allah subhanho wa Taala. So now when you look at these three
components, particularly and you tie it in to fasting, they actually tie in quite well. Because when
you look at the act of remembering Allah subhanho wa Taala, because the slave of Allah subhanaw
taala is not distracted by eating and by drinking and by marital relations, or other than that, he
		
00:02:24 --> 00:03:06
			actually has more of an opportunity to do the vicar of Allah subhanaw taala. And then in terms of
the obedience to Allah subhanho wa Taala. Here, Allah subhanho wa Taala has asked the slave, to give
up his eating, drinking and marital relations, and that is perhaps like one of the greatest acts of
obedience to do to refrain from something that the body naturally has an inclination towards, right,
our bodies naturally have an inclination towards those things, yet you refrain from them, even
though the natural inclination is there, then that is what obedience is like. And then the act of
gratitude. The act of gratitude is built up in many, many ways, gratitude by obeying Allah subhanho,
		
00:03:06 --> 00:03:48
			wa Taala, but even an internal gratitude, that you become grateful for the food, when you actually
eat it, you become grateful for the water, when you actually drink it. Right? You become grateful
for everything else that you have in the Ramadan that you refrain from while you are fasting. So
this definition ties in really, really well with the objective of fasting itself. So those are the
things that you're trying to achieve while in the state of fasting. Now, when an individual is
fasting, one of the common mistakes that is made is that there's a heavy emphasis on the physical
aspect of fasting on refraining from the physical things that Allah subhanaw taala has prohibited.
		
00:03:49 --> 00:04:39
			But that spiritual element is just as important that spiritual element is just as important that
when you view the month of Ramadan, the month of Ramadan is supposed to be a training for the soul
to minimize the sins it commits. And the way it does that, is by two ways. Number one, by increasing
the good deeds that the slave does, and the more good deeds the slave does, naturally, the bad deeds
will wither away. But the second way of doing this is that the slave is to become cognizant of his
own weaknesses of his own areas that shaytan can exploit, and then try to cover up those areas so
that she thought cannot explode them. It was reported that a Buddha or the Allahu anhu he says that
		
00:04:39 --> 00:05:00
			from the true filk of an individual is to understand where shaytaan can come and attack him from
where his vulnerabilities are, that she thought gets the best of him. And that is what Ramadan is
actually about. That you understand your vulnerabilities and you work on those vulnerabilities. So
that shade bond does not give
		
00:05:00 --> 00:05:47
			get the best of you. Now the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam makes it quite clear in the Hadith.
What are two of the major vulnerabilities that people have? Number one is in terms of matters of
intimacy. And number two in terms of matters of their tongue, and particularly in the month of
Ramadan, these are two things that need to be observed. Why, in terms of intimacy, there's a huge
cafaro for the slave of Allah if he was to have intimacy with his own wife, right? the freeing of
the slave the fasting of, you know, 60 consecutive days, the feeding of the poor people. This is
like one of the strictest photos that we find that even though it is Halloween of itself, Allah
		
00:05:47 --> 00:06:31
			subhanaw taala has made it impermissible. So that is a clear indication that Allah subhanaw taala
wants us to learn to control our desires, in the month of Ramadan, that self constraint has to be
there. Right. And, and also in terms of the tongue, there's a very clear wisdom behind why Allah
subhanho wa Taala equates backbiting, with the eating of the flesh of your dead brother. So just
like you do not eat and drink in Ramadan, then you don't want to back bite your fellow brother, or
sister, because it is the equivalent of eating their flesh, it is the equivalent of eating their
flesh. So that is like some of the symbolism behind that. And those are the two things you want to
		
00:06:31 --> 00:07:13
			have really focus on. So now let's talk about the issue of one's intimate desires, in terms of the
intimate desires, and we'll call him Rahim Allah, he has a beautiful discussion on the relationship
that thrilling the stomach has with wanting to fulfill desire. And he says that if you look at the
Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam where he says, All you group of young men, those
of you that are able to get married, should get married. And if you're not able to get married, then
you should fast and he prophesized. And I'm goes on to explain why they should fast, because it will
help them lower their gaze, and will also help them control their private parts. So I have no claim,
		
00:07:13 --> 00:08:00
			Rahim Allah, He expands on this Hadith, that the body naturally has its own priorities. And it will
not focus on procreation, if it is not being sufficed with food. So the less the more you deprive it
of food, the less it focuses on procreation. So here, Allah subhanho wa Taala actually makes it easy
for you, that that your body has been deprived of food, it will not long for that procreation, but
in those instances that it actually does, then this is where that willpower needs to be enforced,
that force your body to submit to Allah subhanaw taala and wait until sunset, so that it can
copulate in a parallel manner with one's wife. And this is you know, something to understand in it.
		
00:08:01 --> 00:08:42
			Also, in this Hadith, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam clearly explains that it will help
lowered one's gaze. And the way that does is that the the desire naturally goes down. Now, this was
an interesting study. And you know, I mentioned this with a grain of salt that as Muslims, we, some
of us have developed a bad habit, that anything anytime you find something scientific, that
coincides either with the Quran or the Sunnah, then we jump to say that, look, you know, our
religion is being proved right by science. And I find that statement very, very troublesome, you
know, as our own personal belief system, our religion is the ultimate source of truth. So it should
		
00:08:42 --> 00:09:28
			be our religion has now proven science to be correct the opposite way around. So even conflating the
two you know, is a dangerous road. But if you do conflate them, then religion proves science correct
and not the other way around, particularly from our own standpoint, from the Muslim ethos. So now,
the study that I was reading was, what is the chemical body or element that is related to desire
inside the individual, and particularly for the man is directly tied into his testosterone. And
naturally, when a man is fasting, his testosterone levels will naturally drop. So that means that
the desire itself has naturally dropped. So the desire that a man will have internally is no longer
		
00:09:28 --> 00:09:59
			forcing him to a certain degree, and I use that term loosely, to look at that which Allah subhanaw
taala has made impermissible, so what causes him to look at that which is impermissible, while his
testosterone is down, is just the weakness of his soul and the trap of shape on and that is where
the person needs to rectify the situation of their soul and protect himself from the traps of
shaitaan. And the way you rectify that situation in terms of your soul, is that you force yourself
to lower your gaze and what that means is that if there's ever an issue
		
00:10:00 --> 00:10:32
			opportunity that you didn't lower your gaze, you actually punish yourself for that. And punishment
and again lose very use very loosely, like simple things like, hey, if I, you know, look at
something and also was to look at, I'm going to increase the amount of sadaqa that I give the first
day you look at something Haram, you get one pound. The second day, if you look at something, how
long you give five pounds, the third day you look at something how long you give 10 pounds, a time
where one of two things will either happen either you're going to run out of money, or you're
someone's going to run is going to say, Hey, you know what, I actually need to stop doing this
		
00:10:32 --> 00:10:51
			because this is getting too painful for me. So that is in terms of refraining from the soul in terms
of protecting yourself from the traps of shavon. She Thawne takes advantages of those opportunities
where he knows you're vulnerable. So if an individual is looking at something hot, I'm in a
particular place, so for example, you're walking through the shopping mall,
		
00:10:52 --> 00:11:30
			or is that shopping mall, we were just at the bullring right the bouldering here in Birmingham. So
in the middle of summer, you're in the bowl rink, you know, people aren't going to be dressed very
appropriately. And that's where you're probably going to find difficulty lowering your gaze at that
time. So the obvious lesson is don't empower shade on by going to a shopping mall at that time. If
you know, this is what your problem is, right? Just don't do it. So don't empower Satan. And that is
how you protect yourself from the plots of shaitaan. So this goes back to the statement of a Buddha,
from the film of an individual is knowing how she will attack him. So recognize where you are
		
00:11:30 --> 00:11:45
			vulnerable to the attacker straight on, and refrain from going to those places or being in those
situations. Now the second element is that of the tongue. Now, as I was mentioning, there is a
divine wisdom behind why Allah subhanho wa Taala
		
00:11:46 --> 00:12:26
			describes backbiting as eating the dead flesh of your brother, and how that ties into Ramadan that
just like eating and drinking is how long then backbiting is even more Haram in the month of
Ramadan, than it is outside the month of Ramadan. Right. So in terms of the tongue, because the
tongue is meant to be busy with the vicar of Allah subhanho wa Taala and the recitation of the
Quran, naturally, it should not have an opportunity to do anything haram with the tongue. But again,
it will come down to understanding the weaknesses of your soul and understanding the traps of
shaitaan. And then with certain people, you will find that naturally, all you will do is backbite.
		
00:12:26 --> 00:13:03
			Or naturally, all you will do is speak about foolish things. So avoid that company, particularly in
the month of Ramadan, so that you don't fall into that trap of shaytaan very become vulnerable. You
know, Islam has a social element to it. And it understands that, yes, there when a group is doing
something, you naturally want to be a part of that group and be a part of what they're doing. Now,
no one has forced you to be a part of that group, though, right? And that's what we need to
understand. So there's a particular circle of friends or a certain particular circle of associates
that we have, that we're doing harm with them, make sure you distance yourself from them in the
		
00:13:03 --> 00:13:31
			month of Ramadan, and eventually build on that outside the month of Ramadan. So you stay away from
that. So this is how taqwa ties in to Ramadan and into the act of fasting that is not just about
refraining from food and drink and intimacy, but even the sins that we commit need to be decreased
and that is how it ties in to Ramadan. Now, what I want to focus on for the next half an hour
inshallah
		
00:13:32 --> 00:14:15
			is what should our schedule look like? In the month of Ramadan? What should our schedule look like
in the month of Ramadan? So what I want to share over here is starting off with the nights of
Ramadan, the nights of Ramadan, generally speaking, are very, very blessed nights, right. And
there's a huge opportunity for adger in the nights of Ramadan, and they want to share with you how
some of the predecessors of the past you to divide us to divide their nights of hotel but daddy
Rahim Allah, he talks about what the scholars of the past used to do. He says the scholars of the
past used to divide their nights into three with three things. The first third of the night, they
		
00:14:15 --> 00:14:59
			would use for the seeking of knowledge and for the revision of knowledge. The second third of the
night, they would focus on the reading of the Quran. And then the last third of the night, they
would focus on the Salah, the last third of the night, they would focus on Salah. Now I found a
similar statement in the sermon hijo cassadine where he talks about the the righteous people of the
past. They would replace the seeking knowledge and revising knowledge with the making of Vicar and
the DA the making of Vicar and to do our so that they would dedicate the first third of their night
to the making of Vicar and then the second third of the night to that of the Quran.
		
00:15:00 --> 00:15:44
			The last third of the night of the Salah. So now, this understanding is going to vary from person to
person, just based upon the fact that if you're in school, or if you have work in the morning, you
cannot dedicate your night completely to that. Now we have a principal in filk that says, mela
Eudora cuando, la youtrack julu, that even though you may not be able to attain the completion of
something, it doesn't mean you don't go after its noblest part. So what that means is in the way we
typed in, is that just because you're not able to spend your entire night in the bath of Allah
subhanaw taala, it doesn't mean that you don't spend any part of your night in the bother of Allah
		
00:15:44 --> 00:16:05
			subhana wa Tada. So making sure that you're getting up early for support, even if you have to go to
work, just to spend some time engaging in a bother, whether it is in salon, whether it is in
recitation of the Koran, whether it is in making a vicar, it should be done during that time. It
should be done during that time.
		
00:16:06 --> 00:16:49
			Number two, how do we spend our days in the Ramadan? Now one of the biggest mistakes we've made as
an oma is that we've separated our worldly life, from our religious life. And what we've done is,
either there's a time to be in this dunya or there's a time to do something for the deen. But we
never put the two together, we never put the two together. Whereas when you look at the attitude of
our predecessors, it was completely different. You know, one of the What a beautiful story that I
love from the people of the past was one the halifa of the mothership no more one, he is on a
journey. And he is with his three young children. And if you've ever traveled with young children,
		
00:16:49 --> 00:17:33
			you know that they're an absolute annoyance. They're like, every five minutes I have to go to the
bathroom or you know, Baba, when are we going to get there, Baba, when are we going to get there? Or
they're going to be like I'm hungry, or I don't feel well. And it's just an absolute pain. So now
you look at how someone from the past dealt with this issue. So as this Khalifa is riding on his
journey, his three young sons are just causing havoc, not listening. He does something very, very
smart. He says, Do you guys see that tree over there? And they're like, yes, Baba, we see that tree.
He's like, I want to see which one of you can say Subhan Allah the Most till we get to that tree. So
		
00:17:33 --> 00:18:01
			they're just sitting there the whole time. They're competing amongst themselves, who can say Subhan
Allah, and they're No, they're not distracting their father anymore. They get to that tree, the
desert. Do you see that other thing over there? Hogan says hamdulillah the most till we reach that
other thing. And this way, their journey became an act of ibadah because they're constantly making
the vicar of Allah subhanho wa Taala. And that is how you put the two together. And that is why even
they in like modern day Saudi Arabia.
		
00:18:02 --> 00:18:39
			You know, one of the beautiful aspects of it is that as you're traveling on the highway, we have
these beautiful signs, you know, don't forget the vicar of Allah subhanaw taala or see Al
Hamdulillah or say Subhana Allah, this is one of the beautiful things that is still there, my shell
at the bottom of Allah. So now the way we put this together, is we want to make sure we have the
same approach to our lives, right? It shouldn't be it's either an act is either a time for a bada or
a time for doing something from the dunya when in fact they should be both be done together. And
there's like a beautiful conversation between them in Java number Musashi, where Marcel actually he
		
00:18:39 --> 00:19:15
			asks, Why were Yaba Musashi? No, madam God asked about Musashi, you know, how do you attain your
agenda from Allah subhanho wa Taala. So almost a response you know, I recite the Quran I pray I give
sadaqa another Moosa, he asked the same question to why this is what how do you earn your adjured
from Allah subhanaw taala. And what are the main Java dolla dolla and he responds by saying, I
earned from my sleep just like you earned from your prayer. And what he meant by that is that an
individual that has a righteous intention before he even goes to sleep, then even his sleep will be
an act of a bother.
		
00:19:16 --> 00:19:55
			So anything that you're meant to be doing, number one, find a way to have a righteous intention
behind it, so that you can be rewarded for that activity. So the wife that is as at home and is
cleaning the house, her intention shouldn't just be you know what, I don't like the house being
dirty. So let me clean the house because that's what I like. But her intention should be that Allah
subhanaw taala loves purity and loves cleanliness. So as an activity by the Let me clean my house,
and she's earning a job in the month of Ramadan and outside the month of Ramadan as she is cleaning
her house. So with each and every single activity that you're doing, find a way to have a righteous
		
00:19:55 --> 00:20:00
			intention behind it, and you'll be naturally rewarded for it. Number
		
00:20:00 --> 00:20:37
			To find a way to incorporate the vicar of Allah subhanaw taala with it, there was a photo that I was
reading from schekman basil Rahim Allah, where he was asked about a woman that is cleaning the
dishes at home while evangel Quran is on the back while the recitation of the Quran the Quran radio
station is on. And she said, you know, shake Am I allowed to do this that, you know, I'm not
completely focused on listening to the Koran, but it's still playing in the background. Is this
something I'm allowed to do? Now obviously, this is a matter of love. But I want to share with you
the perspective of schicken even though buzzer Rahim Allah, that he says yes, this is something that
		
00:20:37 --> 00:21:16
			she is allowed to do. Because one she didn't intentionally engage with the Koran, meaning she didn't
intentionally put like a tape or a CDN, where the Koran is being played, she just turned into a
radio station, and inshallah, that foreign key fire of someone listening to the Quran is being done
elsewhere to people, by people that are listening to the radio station. Number two, is that she
needs to look at that if she's not going to listen to the Koran. Sorry, and she needs to look at
that. Is it better for her to have no listening of the Koran, or for her to zone in and out of the
Quran. And obviously, for that woman to have a little bit of the Koran and to have no Quran is much,
		
00:21:16 --> 00:21:54
			much better for even if she's just listening to bits and pieces of it, and not completely. And then
number three, also points out that if she was not to listen to the Koran, would she be listening to
something else? And the reality is, it's very possible that you know, she might be busy on the phone
talking to someone and that could lead to a futile conversation, or she's listening to something
else on the radio that you shouldn't be listening to. Right, those four sort of possibilities are
all there. So this is how even if you're doing something mundane, where you have the ability to
listen, then there's nothing wrong with listening to a lecture during that time. Or you know,
		
00:21:55 --> 00:22:24
			listening to something else that can incorporate in order reminder of Allah subhanho wa Taala so
intentionally putting on a CD I don't think that's a good thing. But if you can find like a quote on
radio station next segment basilicum Allah mentions in this fatwa Is that something that's fine you
there's many Koran radio stations now on YouTube, in fact, in the month of Ramadan, they're
constantly streaming the live tarawih and recitation of the Quran from the haramain tune into that
that's perfectly fine as well. And that is how incorporate the Quran.
		
00:22:25 --> 00:23:08
			Number three, is that in your free moments, you want to incorporate as much of the vicar of a less
panelists on as possible. When you look into the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam,
there are certain numbers that are mentioned for a reason, right? The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam telling us that whoever says Pinilla 100 times, then you know he will have the rule See,
whoever says panela will become the hero 100 times he will have you know, his sins forgiven, even if
they amounted to as much as the form on the sea. Now, those 100 times is not just thrown out as a
random number is thrown out so that you have a goal in mind that this is what you should be trying
		
00:23:08 --> 00:23:49
			to achieve. Now the son of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, it does not stipulate that it
has to be done all at one time. Right? It doesn't say you have to sit down and you have to do 100
times, you know, while you're sitting in the machine, is not stipulated like that. But when it comes
to the act of Vicar, there's a lot more freedom that you can separate it throughout the day, and do
it at your convenience. So you want to look at what is easily done for you. So whenever you have
those mundane activities, where, for example, a person is driving, right, they have to commute to
work and to back and back. What can you do at that time, right? You would listen to the radio, a lot
		
00:23:49 --> 00:24:21
			of times people don't even do that. They're stuck at a traffic light. And we just start looking
around, you know, we look at what's happening in other people's cars. And I want you to think about
that. Really, like the vast majority of people when they're stuck at traffic lights. What they do
the most is that they look at other people's cars just to see what they're doing. It's like
psychologically proven, so weird spot on law. But if you just take advantage of that opportunity,
that as you're driving, you know, just busy yourself with the code of Allah subhanho wa Taala. How
easy is that? So make your goal. You know what today I want to try to achieve, saying Subhana Allah
		
00:24:21 --> 00:24:59
			will become the he 100 times. And other time I'm going to say Subhana Allah 100 times and other
time, I'm going to say this 100 times and just look into the books of the center. And what numbers
have been legislated for us and try to live up to those numbers, you know, even saying I stuck with
a law up to 70 times or up to 100 times just do it. And a lot of these cards, they don't have
restrictions on them. That it doesn't mean if you can't do 100 you don't do it at all. No Do what is
easy for you. Do what is easy for you to incorporate that into your mundane acts. And that is what
should be done during the days of Ramadan that you still live your day to day.
		
00:25:00 --> 00:25:10
			Life, but you've incorporated your faith into it. And so you can do both together, it doesn't have
to be either, or it doesn't have to be either, or. Now
		
00:25:12 --> 00:25:58
			something that I want to highlight over here is that in the month of Ramadan is the role of family
and friends. And I want to bring a different perspective to this is that people love to be generous
in the month of Ramadan. And especially if you have a big social circle, you're naturally like every
night or every second night, be invited somewhere for a thought. Now the reality of thought is, we
justify going to those thoughts and we're like, Man, that food is going to be amazing. And I get to
keep ties of kinship with my family and with my friends, and it's going to be fun to be with them.
You know what I should do that? But what are the consequences of those? If thoughts? What are the
		
00:25:58 --> 00:26:44
			consequences of those thoughts? The consequences of those if thoughts is that, if not all the time,
a lot of the time, your eba will struggle by going to those avatars, what do I mean by that, you
might end up missing a shot in congregation, right. Or in fact that, you know, while you're there,
time that you could have spent reciting code and then doing a youth guard and doing other things.
You just spend, you know, chit chatting away. That's the first element of suffering. Number two, is
that when people invite you over for if they're not just going to give you dates and water and say
Jazakallah khair. for coming, you know, you guys can leave now, it has to be like the most lavish of
		
00:26:44 --> 00:27:25
			food, like multiple types of biryani multiple types of query, multiple types of desserts, so that
even if you do end up coming to the machine that night, you're having trouble standing. And as
you're having trouble standing, you're like burping every two minutes. And not only is it like bad
for you, where you're like, Oh my god, I can taste what I ate. The people standing next to you can
taste what you eat as well. And it just makes it so much worse. So that is how you're on the bar the
struggles. And then the third thing is that the very next morning, waking up for so hold is an
absolute mission, because you had that heavy meal. And then the fourth thing is that the whole next
		
00:27:25 --> 00:28:06
			day, those lavish foods have ridiculous amounts of salt in them, you're going to feel even more
thirsty than you should be feeling just because of how much sodium is inside your bloodstream at
that time. So that is a perspective I want to bring into this is that be very, very careful and
selective of the downloads that you accept in Ramadan, that in the month of Ramadan, you have to
prioritize generally speaking, it is the HAC of a Muslim upon another Muslim, to accept their
invitation, but not at the expense of worshipping Allah subhanho wa Taala. So if you know for a fact
that your eba is going to suffer, don't accept those invites, or minimize them that say, you know
		
00:28:06 --> 00:28:44
			what, I will accept it once a week, either on a Saturday either on the Sunday, and we'll go out
we'll do this. And you know what, I'm going to end up praying for a week in congregation somewhere,
I'm not going to miss that congregation whatsoever. And I'm going to minimize the amount of talking
that I do so I'm not distracted and do anything wrong. And you know what, I'm actually going to
minimize my portion intake as well, just so it doesn't, you know, become harmful to me in the ways
that I mentioned. So those are some of the important aspects of our social atmosphere in Ramadan,
like our social activity completely revolves around food, and other elements I would like to share
		
00:28:44 --> 00:28:54
			when it comes to family in the month of Ramadan. And this is particularly for the brothers, we have
a very, very bad habit of abusing our wives in
		
00:28:56 --> 00:29:36
			completely bad habit that we expect them to wake up extra early to prepare are so hard. And then
they spend the whole day slaving over getting our authority. And that time between their authority
and their support. They're completely exhausted. Because they've had to do their own chores, they've
had to look after the kids, they've had to do their own work. And it's just complete abuse and
annihilation. And that shouldn't be the case. So this is like a plea that we need to have mercy on
our families. You know, let your wife cook and prepare a couple of times of the week and give her
the rest of the week off. You want to be a super good husband. Why don't you try preparing the
		
00:29:36 --> 00:29:59
			thought and this is what one day, just try for one day we'll see how much of a struggle it is. And
you'll actually appreciate your wife even more for that. So like I said, the man is responsible for
the man of his family. And in this cycle of abuse that takes place in Ramadan, their demand actually
goes down because we don't allow it to flourish. So make sure you allow the amount of flourish make
sure you have an environment that is conducive.
		
00:30:00 --> 00:30:43
			For a month in the month of Ramadan for your family, if you're coming to the masjid, perhaps you can
bring them every night. But at least a couple of nights of the week, try to bring them with you. Let
them experience and enjoy Ramadan, let them experience and enjoy Ramadan. So that's the second
element of the family, I want to share with you. The third element of Ramadan, kids need to feel a
little more Vaughn. Ramadan cannot be like any other month, it has to be special for them. And what
I mean by that is that this is an ideal opportunity to educate your children. Right? When you look
at education of children, at the time of the Sahaba, the Allahu anhu, there are two major things
		
00:30:43 --> 00:31:24
			that stick out. The first major thing is that raising of children during the time of this haba was
not a family obligation, it was a communal obligation, the whole community raised each other's
children. So anytime a child was doing something, right, they would encourage the child to do more
anything a time a child did something wrong, the community member took the opportunity to educate
that child, hey, don't do this, do that. And it was a completely obligate community obligation to
raise those children. The second thing that you learn is that there is no formal concept of a
mcgillis or a school, right. They weren't advanced enough in their, you know, skills of reading and
		
00:31:24 --> 00:31:58
			writing to have something like that. But what they did implement very, very well is that every
opportunity was an education to teach and to direct. So when you look at the Prophet sallallahu,
alayhi wasallam, when he sees that young boy, eating with his left hand, what does the Prophet
salallahu alaihe salam tell us And boy, he says, yo lamb or young boy, eat with your right hand, eat
from what is close to you, and say Bismillah before you eat, so every opportunity is an opportunity
to educate. Now particularly for the month of Ramadan.
		
00:31:59 --> 00:32:43
			We're experiencing Ramadan, anyways, let us try to make Ramadan an educational experience for our
kids. So in this month of Ramadan, spend extra time with them in the activities you're going to do
anyways. So if you're going to recite Koran, time, bring your kids along and recite Quran with them,
and get them to read the Quran. as well. It's time for Salah, get the kids to pray with you as well.
And then naturally, that love that is fostering between a child and their parent, and exponentially
grows. Because this love is no longer based upon that natural affinity between a parent and a child.
But now it's exponentially, you know, invested in through the love of Allah subhanho wa Taala that
		
00:32:43 --> 00:33:29
			relationship has gone to the next level that you're worshiping Allah subhanho wa Taala together, and
it will naturally flourish even more, it will naturally flourish even more. Now, what I want to
conclude with as this session is coming to a close soon, inshallah is that there are multiple things
that you should be doing in the month of Ramadan, to take complete advantage of, and this is what I
want to share with you. Number one is a buddy system, that when you're experiencing Ramadan by
yourself, it's nowhere as half as good as you when you're experiencing it with someone else. And
what I mean by that is, human beings go through like cycles, and particularly in the month of
		
00:33:29 --> 00:34:09
			Ramadan. I think we all experience it, that the first five days of Ramadan, really hyped up really
Jew rejuvenated, we come to the mesh did we want to do as much as we can. And then from like day
five, to like day 10 like half the community disappears, that you look at the machine and there's a
sizable population, that's no longer there. Why? Because they've started to experience that burnout.
So it sounds like that's not true from day 10. That's from like day five to the day 20. Before the
last time night start, that's when the community starts coming back. So one of the good things that
we can do is established a buddy system, someone that you're going to come to taraweeh with. So one
		
00:34:09 --> 00:34:46
			day you drive them and other day they drive you. And the beautiful thing about this is that you hold
each other accountable. You don't let a night come where you want to skip the lobby, oh, I feel
tired that night, I'm not going to go, your friend is there to remind you that you know what, we're
in this together. And we're going to go and pray together. So you have that extra motivation to keep
you on track. Number two, is that there is this really, really nice app that was launched last year
by a brother in Scotland. You know, it's not perfect, but it's still a very, very good app. And it's
called the Ramadan legacy app. And I would suggest that you guys download this app if you get the
		
00:34:46 --> 00:35:00
			opportunity and just experience it that each and every single day of Ramadan, you actually get
multiple reminders, reminders to read the Quran, reminders to make Vicar reminders to give to do an
act of
		
00:35:00 --> 00:35:26
			sadhaka. And those reminders are very, very nice. It also allows you to journal in that app. So how
much code can I read today? And where am I going to start and continue from tomorrow? You know, how
many times did they do the garden, how much is left over that I could continue at a later time. So
it has those features that are really, really nice as well. So downloading that app is something
that is highly, highly encouraged. And then number three, and the third and last thing,
		
00:35:27 --> 00:36:08
			in terms of maximizing your potential for Ramadan is from now think about the goals that you wanted
to achieve. Right? As I mentioned this at the beginning, we talked about what are the objectives of
Islamic law? And what are the objectives of Ramadan, that each and every Ramadan, choose some of
those objectives. And try to make the utmost most of them, don't try to do everything, you can't do
everything, it's not possible. But each and every Ramadan, try to focus on a few of those
objectives, like giving sadaqa like completing a reading of the Koran, like you know, praying a
certain number of rock eyes, right? Those are all goals that are very achievable. So focus on the
		
00:36:08 --> 00:36:45
			few of them, every Ramadan, perfected them, and then next Ramadan, either increase on it, or perhaps
even change your goals altogether, and then try to make the most of them move on. But goal setting
is very, very important. Right, we have goals in terms of our education, we have goals in terms of
our work, but we need to have goals for our iba as well. And I want to share a beautiful story that
one of my teachers from Saudi Arabia, told me and this is what we'll conclude on this one and open
up the floor for questions in Sharla. There's a young 16 year old boy, and he's telling this story
as if you're experiencing this as a movie. So that's what I want to tell the story as imagine
		
00:36:45 --> 00:37:31
			experiencing this as a movie, that there's this young man, 16 years old, and he wakes up at the end
for us. So the advanced going off, Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar. And this young boy wakes up in a
panic. And in his bed, he starts crying. So now as you're watching this movie, you're wondering, why
is this boy crying as his hearing the event, you know, doesn't make any sense. This boy runs inside
the bathroom hurries to make widow comes back out, and he runs out of his house. And he's walking as
fast as he can towards the machine. As he's walking towards the machine, you're just watching him
from a distance. And you see this boy stop. And he starts crying again. And this time he's crying,
		
00:37:31 --> 00:38:11
			because people are coming out of the masjid. And you're wondering, why is this boy crying? And
what's causing him to cry as people are coming out of the masjid? Then you see this young boy, he
starts thinking, he's contemplating he's wondering, you can see his mind is very engaged. Then you
see this voice smile, he becomes happy now. And you see him walk as fast as he can, in the direction
of another machine. He climbs up the stairs, and in the area where people take off their shoes. You
know, if you go too much in Saudi Arabia to take their shoes off on the outside, it's just like a
mess outside. And that area will people have taken off their shoes. This boy he takes a peek inside
		
00:38:11 --> 00:38:51
			the machine. And in the area where the shoes are taken off. He does such a shocker. He thanks Allah
subhanaw taala by making it such that that time, and then he goes inside, and he prays. Now this
young boy, he comes out. And you're curious that why was the boy crying multiple times? Why did he
become happy? Why did he perform surgeries, the sugar right there. And then what was that great
event that he remembered that he needed to thank Allah subhanaw taala for. So now you finally get to
speak to this young boy. And he starts to tell you that he heard the Hadith of the Prophet salallahu
alayhi wa sallam that whoever prays 40 days in congregation, unless I know it's either would free
		
00:38:51 --> 00:38:58
			his neck from two things from hypocrisy, and from the hellfire. And that day where you saw him woke
up at the end of
		
00:38:59 --> 00:39:42
			it was his last day his last Salah. And he knew that if he woke up at the event, he would miss the
congregation altogether. So that is why he woke up crying because he thought that he had missed the
congregation. So he made will do and he walked as fast as he could to the mustard. And as he saw the
people coming out of the mustard, his heart completely sank. He's like it's actually come true. Now.
I missed the last slot, the last 39 days and for Salas have been in vain. I couldn't achieve my
goal. And he was so distraught. And as he sat there, now he's thinking he's contemplating. He's
thinking, is there an other way that I can catch another congregation. And then he remembers that
		
00:39:42 --> 00:40:00
			there is another mush did that praise us or later than the machete that he usually goes to? So he
starts walking to that machine, he's climbing up the stairs. He's not sure if they finished us or
not, though. So he climbs up the stairs and he peeks inside the machine from where the shoes are. He
looks inside and the people
		
00:40:00 --> 00:40:38
			still sitting in the first row, they haven't prayed yet. So right there and then he's so thankful to
Allah subhanaw taala, that Allah subhanaw taala allowed him to catch his congregation that he makes
such that the show go over there. And then he goes inside and he prays a lot the last set. Now the
biggest lesson that I derive from this, and by the way, this is not the story of some Sahabi there's
not the story of some famous female of the past. This is literally the story of a 16 year old kid in
Saudi Arabia in Medina. Right, just a regular person, but made him unique though was he had goals in
his ibadah, he wanted to make an objective for 40 days, I want to pray in congregation. This is my
		
00:40:38 --> 00:41:21
			goal. And this is the message I want to leave you with that in life, we have goals for everything.
And it is only through our goals, that we measure our success and failures. So this will move on. If
you want to see how successful your Ramadan is going to be. Start setting your goals from now start
thinking about what it looks like. And at the end of Ramadan. You can see, hey, I was successful in
this, but I failed on this. And this is what I need to work on. So now I want to quickly recap
everything that we took today, that in the month of Ramadan, you are meant to focus on three things,
you're meant to focus on your relationship with the Quran. And we mentioned on how to make that
		
00:41:21 --> 00:42:01
			practical that that relationship needs to begin before the month of Ramadan. And it needs to be
consistent every day. And you will have three types of reading the reading for the sake of reading,
reading for the sake of understanding and reading for the sake of implementation. And that needs to
start before Ramadan. And in the month of Ramadan, try to do a bottom or a completion of the Koran
by just reading five pages before after every Salah. Then the second thing you want to focus on in
the month of Ramadan is the salon itself is the salon itself. And that needs to happen in two ways,
building upon the layers of the salon, the Father, the Son and the novel, and also building on the
		
00:42:01 --> 00:42:43
			quality of the salon by taking your time by understanding the meanings and understanding the actions
that you're doing. And the good book for that, as I mentioned is the inner dimensions of salon, but
it will call you then the third element of Ramadan is the act of fasting. And the act of fasting is
to teach self restraint to teach the vicar of Allah subhanho wa Taala and to teach gratitude and
that is how we defined taqwa according to our beloved muscles. And then we took the practical steps
that we mentioned at the end. So how those goals, jot them down, write them down, measure them and
build upon your Ramadan experience every year. And this is how I've been trying to get over the pain
		
00:42:43 --> 00:43:18
			of missing Alamo bonds in Medina. You know, since I graduated, as I mentioned, I haven't been able
to go back for a move on and that's something I longed for. But the only way I've been able to
compensate for that feeling of having Ramadan in Medina, is by setting these goals for myself that
Ramadan in Medina, you're a part of the system, right? You can't really create those goals as much
as you want. Just because there's that system that's already in place. But in the Western world
where a system isn't in place and you get to create your own system, that's when you can take
advantage of those goals. So set those goals and take advantage of them. Anything that I've said
		
00:43:18 --> 00:43:30
			that is correct, All praise is due to Allah subhana wa tada and Allah subhanho wa Taala alone.
Anything that I've said that is incorrect is from myself and from shavon and I seek forgiveness from
Allah subhanho wa Taala and from you and