Naima B. Robert – Stop Using Your Children Against Your Spouse REAL TALK

			I think we are facing a real
problem in the community, in that
		

			we have become totally self
centered. And it shows up in every
		

			area of our lives, whether it's in
the husband's role, the wife's
		

			role, the ex husband, the ex wife,
in laws, everything is about
		

			ourselves and what we want and
what we want to make the other
		

			person feel. And certainly, we've
been hearing so much more about
		

			children being used as weapons, by
their parents, often by their
		

			mothers, when two adults are no
longer on the same page, when
		

			they're no longer committed to
each other, it can be very, very
		

			difficult to put those feelings
aside and focus on the well being
		

			of the children. But that is what
we must do.
		

			Put your feelings aside, your
hurt, your pain, your
		

			disappointment, your ego, your
pride, to the side, and make
		

			intention for these children that
are lost planet Allah has blessed
		

			you with.
		

			Well, Allah He, the fate of our
kids, lies so heavily in our
		

			hands. And as parents as the
adults in the situation, we have
		

			to come back to the reality that
these children are a manner that
		

			they are a gift on loan to us. And
every decision that we make,
		

			especially if there is something
as devastating to children as a
		

			breakup, every decision that we
make will impact those children,
		

			often for life. So the brothers
and sisters who are at war right
		

			now, using their children to hurt
their ex spouse, please take a
		

			moment to remember these children
and their rights upon you. And ask
		

			yourself, what is the lesson that
I want to teach my children in
		

			this moment, in this period this
difficult time? What is the
		

			example that I want to set for
them? Because at the end of the
		

			day, our children have to know
that we love them regardless, and
		

			that we prioritize them and their
well being and they akhira
		

			regardless of what's happened with
our partner with our spouse, and
		

			may Allah make it easy for those
couples who are at war and using
		

			their children in between this
fight. May Allah make it easy for
		

			us to remove those feelings of
hurt and pain and allow us to stop
		

			putting our children at risk by
making them pay the price from
		

			when we as adults have not managed
to make our marriages work like it
		

			does