Naima B. Robert – Gratitude Episode 03 A Sister’s Ramadan

And welcome back to a Sister's Ramadan.

I'm your host, Naima B. Robert, and I'm

honored that you've joined me today.

This show is all about answering one central

question.

How can we as Muslim women

use this time in Ramadan

to grow and heal?

I would like to explore with you how

we can renew and replenish our iman and

our spirits throughout this blessed month.

The purpose of this show is to share

a set of skills

that are essential for personal growth and healing.

And also the ways in which we can

best practice them through the rituals of Ramadan.

Insha Allah, it will offer you a perspective

that will be beneficial

long after the month has passed. Be'ivnillah. In

today's episode, we will be looking at the

power of Dua and

importance of setting healthy boundaries.

There is no doubt

that many of us may be experiencing

aspects of our lives that are new, that

are different, that are unfamiliar.

And usually, the impact of big changes,

big disruption to our normal routine

is

fear, anxiety,

stress,

general lack of certainty,

which can lead to its own set of

issues.

And because we know that this life, this

world that we live in is a place

of test and examination, that things are constantly

changing,

moving, disrupting.

This means that

anxiety, stress, fear

are a natural part of our experience as

human beings.

Now Abu Hurayra reported that Allah's Messenger sallallahu

alaihi wa sallam said, the believer does not

allow himself to be stung twice from the

same hole.

So my question to you is this,

is there anything in your life right now,

anything that you're doing, anything that you're exposing

yourself to that is bringing on increased levels

of fear, anxiety or stress.

Because if there is, which for many of

us is the case,

I'm going to invite you now

to examine those things

and ask yourself,

if I'm truly preserving

my sense of peace, my iman,

Will I put my attention towards this thing?

Will I focus my energies on this thing?

And it could be anything. It could be

social media. It could be the news. It

could be a particularly

toxic family member. It could be your own

negative thoughts.

Whatever they are, I'm going to invite you

this Ramadan to examine them

and make a decision

to safeguard your own peace of mind.

Moving on to the aspect of Ramadan that

I would like us to focus on in

this particular episode, and that is Dua.

Because

the cure for the fear, the anxiety, the

stress

is Dua.

The comfort that we seek, the sakinah,

the peace of mind that we are all

wishing and hoping for,

can be found with Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala.

And a beautiful reminder of this is,

when Allah says,

and when my servants ask you concerning me,

then answer them.

I am indeed near to them.

I respond

to the supplications

of the supplicant

when he calls on me.

SubhanAllah, Aladeem.

So on the one hand, we have this

life of fears and anxieties and things that

we can't control.

On the other hand, we have a Lord

who assures us

that when we call out to him,

he hears and he responds.

Ibn Al Qayyim said, The Dua is one

of the most beneficial cures

and is the enemy of all diseases.

It fights them and cures them and prevents

their occurrence

and causes them to be raised up or

reduced after its occurrence.

It is the weapon of the believer.

So my dear sister, I ask you this,

at those moments when you are feeling low,

when you are gripped by fear or uncertainty

or anxiety and you worry about the future

or the present or the past.

How many times do you remember

the Dua?

And the ease and the solace and the

comfort that is in the Dua.

I hope this is a reminder for you,

anytime those feelings of fear or anxiety come

up, to turn to Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala

and remember his promise,

that He hears the supplication

of the supplicant and He responds.

Again, another amazing reminder of

the fact that although we are simply 1

in a 1000000000 other human beings, you know,

in our own way, nothing special.

While that is true,

we are also

special to Allah, Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala, in that

he hears us, he sees us, he knows

us,

and He is almighty and all aware and

able to respond to every single one of

us.

In terms of personal skills, my sister,

the big takeaway I want you to take

from this episode

is setting healthy boundaries.

A lot of the time

when we are going through life on a

day to day, we allow a lot of

things into our mind space. As I said,

it could be the news, it could be

social media, it could be friends or family

that have a negative influence on us.

Setting healthy boundaries

means setting up a wall of love around

your head and your heart.

Your emotional, mental, and spiritual health is your

responsibility.

You are the one who must guard your

mental state, your emotional state, and your spiritual

state at all costs.

Now,

this doesn't mean that you go around upsetting

people, that you go around, you know, making

enemies or having fights with people and sort

of pushing them away.

It doesn't mean that. But what it means

is that you take active steps to protect

your space emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

Because at the end of the day, the

Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam advised us

to take benefit of 5 before 5.

Your youth before your old age,

Your health before your sickness.

Your wealth before your poverty.

Your free time before you are preoccupied

and your life before your death.

And subhanAllah,

He also told us that there are 2

blessings which many people lose.

They are health and free time for doing

good.

Now, I ask you my dear sister,

look at these 5.

Are they not wasted and frittered away by

not having a protective boundary around them? Look

at your time,

look at your health,

look at your wealth.

If you don't set up boundaries to protect

those things

and treat them as the that they are,

then they will always be intruded on. Your

time will be wasted

in ways that are not beneficial. Your wealth

will be frittered away on extravagant useless things.

Your health will be wasted by you not

actually taking care of it and taking ownership

of it.

So

today's

big takeaway

is setting up those healthy boundaries.

And I would like to invite every one

of you to ask yourself,

what am I allowing?

What am I allowing into my space that

is not benefiting me in any way?

And don't be afraid to start saying,

I'm not going to allow that into my

space anymore.

Now many of you may have an issue

with toxic friends or family members. Negative people,

people who have a negative negative effect on

you, your iman, your emotional well-being, your mental

health even. And I know that many sisters

struggle with being able to set healthy boundaries,

and you may be thinking to yourself, Sister

Naima, this sounds great, but you don't know

my auntie so and so. You don't know

my cousin.

And my invitation to you is to start

with the understanding for yourself that my mental

health is important.

My spiritual state is important. My emotional well-being

has value.

Start there,

because many of

us don't make boundaries because we don't think

that those things are important. Or we think

it's someone else's job to look after us,

and to make sure that we're okay.

But my dear sister,

as a slave of Allah,

You will answer for those 5 things to

Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. You will answer for

your health. You will answer for your wealth.

You will answer for your time, you will

answer for how you live this life. And

so it's your responsibility to protect those things,

so you have the right answers to give.

So start with the understanding that you matter,

and that your personal state matters,

and then start dealing with the people.

JazakAllah Khayron for joining me for this episode.

SubhanAllah.

If you've benefited from anything that I've said,

Alhamdulillahi

rublaalamin.

Please do give us your comments. Tell us

what you think and share this with friends

and family.

Don't forget to use the hashtag sistersramadhan,

and tag iman channel, and me, your sister,

Naeema b Robert.

Subhan'alaqallahumarabbanobihamdikashaduunla

ilahaillah and washtaghfirukawanatoobuilayk.

See you in the next episode when we

will be discussing the importance of istighfar

and the power of letting go.