Nahela Morales – Christmas For New Muslims Don’t Isolate Yourselves

Nahela Morales
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The speaker discusses the difficulties of Christmas celebrations in the UK, including the lack of religious celebrations and the need for socializing with family. They suggest maintaining family ties and visiting family events, but also acknowledge the potential for feelings of isolation and sadness.

AI: Summary ©

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			Salam aleikum, everybody. So
Christmas time is fast approaching
		
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			us. And for many new Muslims, this
is a very difficult time we are
		
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			faced with dilemmas. Should we go
and sit with our families should
		
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			we not? What many born Muslims
don't understand is that this time
		
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			is full of traditions and fond
memories and happiness. And it's
		
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			difficult for new Muslims. Because
we don't know it. Should we
		
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			abandon that or not. I remember
looking back at my family time at
		
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			Christmas, and it's always been
full of fondness. And it's just
		
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			about family. We are not a
religious family. And the 25th and
		
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			26th of December in in the UK are
public holidays. So more than
		
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			likely this is when the whole of
families can sit together because
		
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			everybody seems to be off at the
same time. I'm from a coal mining
		
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			background. So you know, my dad
used to have two weeks off for
		
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			Christmas and, and his brothers,
and all of my relatives actually.
		
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			So it was just a time that we all
used to congregate together and
		
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			just enjoy the season. It was
never religious, we weren't
		
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			religious family, we didn't go to
church to celebrate, there was no
		
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			actual religious celebration in it
whatsoever. Unless you count the
		
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			hymns, and the nativity play done
at every school, which still goes
		
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			on till now in the UK.
		
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			With my family, we used to go to
my grandma's house from my
		
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			mother's side on Christmas Day.
And we used to sit all together
		
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			me, my two sisters, my parents, my
grandma, two of my Auntie's, and
		
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			my cousin, and we used to sit
there and have a nice dinner. And
		
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			then after this, we would reenact
school plays that we used to do,
		
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			for example, Cinderella, or
Sleeping Beauty, because my
		
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			grandma didn't used to come and
see them so often. And we used to
		
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			try and remember those so that we
could do those in front of her, we
		
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			would also play with some toys
that we had, or we would watch the
		
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			films on TV. And then later on at
night, from my mother's side, one
		
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			of her other sisters would do her
a big family get together at
		
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			night, and the kids would play
party games like pass the pass. So
		
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			musical statues, musical chairs,
and you know, it'd be full of
		
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			sandwiches and these lovely cakes
and things that kids love. And
		
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			then on Boxing Day, we would do
the exact same again only with my
		
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			dad's family. So it was just
purely family time for us. So when
		
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			they got to be a common Muslim, I
didn't stop it because it was the
		
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			only time that we can sit
together. And because we had no
		
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			religious element in it
whatsoever. There was nothing
		
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			wrong with it. And in Islam, we
are supposed to keep how family
		
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			ties. So when I first got married,
my husband had his first time with
		
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			us and it carried on up until my
daughter was born. I have missed
		
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			just three Christmases with my
family. The first one was actually
		
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			the first year I became a Muslim.
But it was through work, I had to
		
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			work so I wasn't with my family
whatsoever. And I think that was
		
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			the first time I probably felt how
any new Muslim feels when they are
		
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			isolated, or maybe pushed out by
their families because I was
		
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			completely alone. And it was so
horrible for me.
		
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			And I just remember just being so
sad. And it was nothing to do with
		
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			my family. I just had to work. But
this is a choice that many new
		
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			Muslims face. And it's very
difficult time. So my suggestion
		
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			here would be at least surround
yourself with people who are also
		
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			not celebrating it. So you're not
feeling alone, and you're not
		
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			feeling sad. Or maybe you can
treat yourself for a few days
		
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			away, just to forget that and just
try and have a little bit of fun
		
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			instead. The other two times was
my daughter's birth because she
		
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			was born Christmas Eve which was
the 24th of December, and we were
		
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			in hospital. But that was a joyous
occasion in itself. And this the
		
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			time was I was ill. I had been
diagnosed with cancer five months
		
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			beforehand. And so I was in Egypt
for Christmas. And in Egypt. They
		
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			don't celebrate Christmas. Muslims
don't anyway and the Christians
		
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			celebrated on the seventh of
January. So it was just in very
		
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			normal time for me. And because of
everything I was going through
		
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			even if I was at home, I don't
think it would have been very nice
		
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			for me. Anyway. This year will be
our first year in Canada as as a
		
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			three my husband and my daughter
and I can't make her forget that
		
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			her family is Christian. We must
keep those ties with those. So
		
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			she's been given presents from
them and we've sent them presents
		
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			as well. Plus she gets her
birthday the day before so she's
		
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			going to be happy spending lots of
days playing with their new toys.
		
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			We will just have a quiet time
just the three of us having some
		
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			dinner and I will do a live video
chat with my my family so that I
		
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			can
		
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			still be a part of it in some way.
And so that I can still be with
		
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			them on some in some way. And
Islam teachers never cut the ties
		
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			of family. So if this is how I'm
going to create strong bonds with
		
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			them, then I'm going to do that.
And for those of you who are
		
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			wondering what to do, if you are
still close with your family, I
		
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			suggest you go and visit them at
least even if you are not
		
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			comfortable with the whole Merry
Christmas or giving gifts, at
		
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			least go and sit with them on the
day so that they can still see
		
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			that you want to be a part of
them. It's very important to keep
		
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			those family ties, you don't have
to participate and you shouldn't
		
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			participate in any of the
religious meaning, but at least a
		
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			family get together. This is okay.
As far as if you're away from your
		
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			family, you've been pushed away
from your family and you're facing
		
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			it alone. Again, I would suggest
you surround yourself with your
		
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			Muslim friends or maybe you treat
yourself to a few days away
		
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			anything not to be alone at this
time because it can be very, very
		
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			hard. Anyway, I hope those tips
have been helpful. And I will I
		
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			will see you all soon as salaam
aleikum wa rahmatullah wa
		
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			barakato.