Mustafa Khattab – Tafsir Sura Yusuf 7 Part 2

Mustafa Khattab
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The speaker describes various women in dressing rooms with men, emphasizing the importance of finding a good balance between work and personal life. They stress the need for release from punishment, stress, and finding a good balance between work and personal life. The speakers also discuss the rights of couples, the importance of not being engaged until 5, and the need for supervision and supervision of relationships. They stress the need for release from stress and finding a good balance between work and personal life.

AI: Summary ©

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			And she gave up. She said, what what
		
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			is this? He's not taking all the clues
		
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			I'm throwing for him. What is this?
		
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			Maybe he doesn't get it, so I have
		
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			to be very abrupt with him.
		
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			So she locked the doors.
		
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			They say in the Tafasir,
		
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			there were 7 doors in the palace,
		
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			so she locked all the doors.
		
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			And she said,
		
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			She doesn't
		
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			locked the doors, she locked them firmly.
		
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			She made sure that no one is coming.
		
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			Like there are some people they have like
		
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			10 locks on the door.
		
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			And the thing because they are afraid.
		
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			And eventually the thief will come from the
		
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			window. Okay?
		
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			And she said,
		
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			come to me.
		
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			Okay. She was very subjective. She was very
		
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			revealing in the way she was dressed.
		
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			Now in her in her words, she's very
		
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			abrupt.
		
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			I want you. I'm ready. Come. Come to
		
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			me. Okay?
		
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			Imam Abdulkayim
		
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			describes
		
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			this situation.
		
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			So I remember. She
		
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			said,
		
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			if a woman that you go to work
		
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			with
		
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			or your,
		
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			colleague at school invites you to do something
		
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			haram,
		
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			if you say no,
		
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			well, in this case, you are a hero.
		
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			Or something.
		
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			She she
		
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			tries to seduce you. She said, come, you
		
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			know, let's have a good time together and
		
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			all that stuff. If you refuse,
		
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			then you are from a badulrahman.
		
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			The people who don't make zina. Right? Commit
		
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			adultery.
		
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			But he said the situation of Yusuf alaihi
		
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			salam, it is not,
		
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			like an acquaintance.
		
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			He gives 13 different reasons why Yusuf alaihi
		
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			salam
		
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			yeah. And he did a fantastic job refusing
		
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			to do something haram. He said number 1,
		
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			the lady was beautiful.
		
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			Right? They say she was very beautiful.
		
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			And number 2,
		
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			she had authority over him. She was not
		
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			asking him kindly.
		
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			She was giving him an order, like, you
		
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			have to do it. Like,
		
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			you know, I'm your boss. You have to
		
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			do it.
		
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			At the end of the story, she said,
		
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			if he doesn't do
		
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			what I command him to do, like, she's
		
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			commanding because he is
		
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			working for me. He's living in my house.
		
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			I'm feeding him right.
		
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			So he has to do it.
		
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			Her authority.
		
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			And number 3, his youth and beauty. There
		
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			are so many hadith about how beautiful he
		
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			was and all these things. And sometimes
		
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			when you see yourself beautiful,
		
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			you say, you know,
		
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			I deserve to do this because I look
		
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			good. Right?
		
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			But if you don't look as good, you
		
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			said,
		
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			hamdulillah
		
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			Allah. Yeah. And he protected us from this
		
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			fit now. Right?
		
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			So
		
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			if someone has these qualifications,
		
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			he looks good. The eyes, the hair, whatever,
		
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			the height, you know, I deserve this. I
		
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			would do it, inshallah. And it wouldn't be
		
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			a problem because,
		
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			you know, I just look at the girl
		
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			and she will follow me. Right? Because the
		
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			way I look,
		
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			his youth and his beauty. They say that
		
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			use of Alai Salam had half of the
		
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			beauty of humanity. Allah, Adam, it can be
		
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			an exaggeration. We don't know. We never saw
		
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			him, but he was very beautiful,
		
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			and he was a youth.
		
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			And you have this,
		
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			instinct
		
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			to be with someone.
		
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			Right?
		
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			This is the human nature.
		
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			Right?
		
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			And number
		
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			4, he says he was a stranger.
		
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			Like, say, for example, you live here in
		
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			Saint Catherine's. Your family is here. Your friends
		
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			are here.
		
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			If you walk in the street, if you
		
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			date the girl, you walk in the street,
		
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			maybe the imam will see you.
		
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			Maybe you and dad will see you and
		
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			he will give you a nice beating when
		
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			you go home. Maybe your mom, maybe your
		
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			sister, maybe someone you know, and he will
		
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			report to your mom.
		
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			Right?
		
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			But if you are in a a stranger
		
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			in you are in Vancouver, you are in
		
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			a different country,
		
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			no one knows you there. So you can
		
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			do whatever you want. Right?
		
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			This is why a lot of brothers, they
		
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			have, like, a master's degree.
		
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			They go somewhere to a different country. They
		
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			can't find a job of let me go
		
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			to this, to Tim Hortons, man. I'm gonna
		
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			wash the dishes because nobody knows me here.
		
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			Right?
		
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			And some people
		
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			in their countries,
		
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			because they know that the culture is against
		
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			it.
		
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			So when they come here for a scholarship,
		
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			they come to study.
		
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			I know so many cases.
		
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			Nobody knows me here. I can do whatever
		
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			I want. They never come to the masjid.
		
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			Like, we have literally hundreds
		
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			of students in this country, actually, in this
		
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			city from different countries.
		
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			Most of them are from conservative countries.
		
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			There they have to go to the Masjid
		
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			5 Salawat. Right? They have to dress in
		
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			a certain way. They have to live decently.
		
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			But as soon as they come here, not
		
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			even as soon as they come here from
		
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			the air from the from the plane.
		
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			They take off. They do whatever. Right? Because
		
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			they know that no one sees them here
		
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			except Allah. So now they do whatever they
		
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			want.
		
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			So he was a stranger.
		
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			If he did anything, nobody would have known.
		
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			Right?
		
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			Especially his family because they were in a
		
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			distant place.
		
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			Number
		
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			5.
		
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			She was willing,
		
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			right?
		
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			As we said, she was busting all the
		
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			moves, so she was willing. Usually,
		
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			if you are a youth, you are interested
		
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			in a girl.
		
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			Can I buy you coffee?
		
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			Can you talk to me?
		
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			You got beautiful eyes.
		
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			Are you on Facebook?
		
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			You know, so you are offering.
		
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			But in her case, she was the one
		
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			who was offering. Right?
		
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			You can't get any better than this. Right?
		
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			What is this? You know, you don't have
		
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			to do anything.
		
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			She's like, she is ready, man.
		
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			You talk to our girl, you look beautiful,
		
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			she slaps you in the face.
		
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			This is not my lucky day. But she
		
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			was willing, not only willing, she was offering
		
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			herself,
		
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			and she was doing all the moves as
		
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			they say in the tafsir. Maybe the quality
		
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			of the clothes,
		
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			you know, how the women do sometimes, you
		
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			know,
		
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			revealing clothes, inviting clothes, the way they talk
		
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			and all these things.
		
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			You
		
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			know? Asala Vista, baby. All this stuff, you
		
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			know? And she was insisting because it says
		
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			in the eye of warah with that too.
		
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			You don't make more for someone if you
		
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			invite him to do something once or twice.
		
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			It must have been 15, 20 times every
		
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			day like she was bugging him day and
		
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			night. Rawah with that too.
		
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			And,
		
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			number
		
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			8,
		
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			she threatened him.
		
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			If he doesn't do what I'm commanding him
		
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			to do,
		
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			he's going to jail
		
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			and he will be humiliated,
		
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			disgraced. I'm gonna humiliate him in front of
		
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			everyone. So 2 threats.
		
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			And number 9,
		
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			if
		
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			he committed something haram with her, no one
		
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			would have known. No one would have doubted
		
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			him. Why?
		
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			Because he was living with her in the
		
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			same house under the same roof.
		
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			Right? He was in the house.
		
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			So, ma'am,
		
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			they asked this, lady was brought for Zina
		
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			with her slave. Like, it was in the
		
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			house with her. They said,
		
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			why didn't you make Zina with a free
		
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			man? It would have I mean, it would
		
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			have been we would have been more respectful
		
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			of you if you made dinner with
		
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			a free man. Why you're a slave? She
		
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			said, he was with me in the house
		
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			all the time.
		
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			Right? So I felt this closeness because he
		
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			was there
		
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			and no one would have doubted because he
		
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			was already in the house. But if they
		
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			see a free man from outside,
		
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			they're gonna start asking questions.
		
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			What is he doing in the house? So
		
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			they will know. So this is what happened
		
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			with Yusuf alaihis salam. He was there all
		
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			the time. So no one would have doubted
		
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			if they saw him inside the house.
		
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			Or maybe he was laughing or sitting with
		
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			the lady. They are having a light moment
		
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			up.
		
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			He's her son
		
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			because she adopted him. Right?
		
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			Nobody would doubt anything. Right?
		
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			Carlos,
		
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			number.
		
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			I don't know. 10.
		
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			Her husband was very lenient. Like, at the
		
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			end of the story,
		
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			she was crying.
		
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			There's a crime here.
		
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			It's either him or her, Yusuf or the
		
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			lady who did something wrong.
		
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			Try to attack the lady, harass her or
		
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			she was, you know, whatever.
		
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			And he said, okay. Yusuf,
		
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			like, oh, Yusuf, Don't talk about it. Don't
		
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			mention it, man. Don't talk about this, man.
		
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			It's okay, man. Nothing happened, man. You know,
		
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			like this.
		
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			Say sorry
		
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			because you are at fault.
		
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			That's it.
		
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			Like,
		
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			no chairs flying,
		
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			no shooting.
		
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			Like nothing happened. Like he's okay. Like it's
		
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			cool man. Like nothing happened man. What is
		
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			the what kind of man is this? Right?
		
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			He was a lenient man
		
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			locking the doors. As we said, she was
		
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			so insistent. She was locking all the doors.
		
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			So
		
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			I mean,
		
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			she was very insist she was into it.
		
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			Also,
		
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			this is number 12.
		
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			The women
		
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			that she invited for the banquet,
		
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			she told him the same thing.
		
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			You know, you're in her house. She is
		
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			feeding you. She has authority over you.
		
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			You have to listen to her. Listen to
		
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			her, please. You know?
		
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			It says it says at the end of
		
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			the story of the banquet, oh, Allah, if
		
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			you don't keep their cunning away from me,
		
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			maybe I will do something haram.
		
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			So they say in the tafsir, why he
		
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			said this? Although the lady was trying to
		
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			seduce him,
		
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			he said if you don't keep their cunning
		
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			away from me, they say because they told
		
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			him
		
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			obey her, listen to her. Whatever she asking
		
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			for do it.
		
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			So he was pressured
		
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			by the ladies.
		
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			So this is why Ibn al Qayyim
		
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			said,
		
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			well, Yusuf alaihis salam was a great man
		
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			because of all these pressures,
		
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			all of these things around him, he still
		
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			refused.
		
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			So he said,
		
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			when he refused to do it,
		
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			is the first reason.
		
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			I won't do it because of Allah.
		
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			This is number 1. Because he was afraid
		
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			of the punishment.
		
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			And number 2,
		
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			you can call someone.
		
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			Rub is like the maintainer,
		
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			is the provider.
		
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			Like, your dad is called Rabulbayt.
		
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			Well, the mother is called Rabbatulbayt.
		
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			Like, she is the guardian. She is taking
		
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			care of things. So the word Rab in
		
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			this case means a guardian or someone who's
		
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			taking care of someone.
		
00:11:49 --> 00:11:51
			How can I betray
		
00:11:51 --> 00:11:54
			the man who has been nice to me
		
00:11:54 --> 00:11:56
			in gratitude? So the first one is the
		
00:11:56 --> 00:11:58
			punishment of Allah. The second reason
		
00:11:58 --> 00:12:00
			is because of his master. How can I
		
00:12:00 --> 00:12:02
			do something like this?
		
00:12:05 --> 00:12:07
			And number 3, the
		
00:12:08 --> 00:12:10
			wrongdoers, the people who do something haram will
		
00:12:10 --> 00:12:12
			never succeed. Right?
		
00:12:13 --> 00:12:15
			And they say if someone does something wrong
		
00:12:16 --> 00:12:18
			with a single lady, this is not as
		
00:12:18 --> 00:12:20
			terrible in the side of Allah than someone
		
00:12:20 --> 00:12:22
			who does something haram with a lady who
		
00:12:22 --> 00:12:23
			is already married.
		
00:12:23 --> 00:12:26
			Because you violated the lady and you violated
		
00:12:26 --> 00:12:27
			the right of her husband.
		
00:12:27 --> 00:12:28
			Right?
		
00:12:29 --> 00:12:29
			And also,
		
00:12:30 --> 00:12:31
			maybe
		
00:12:32 --> 00:12:34
			if things work in a certain way, maybe
		
00:12:34 --> 00:12:36
			you can end up marrying the single lady.
		
00:12:37 --> 00:12:39
			If both make tawba, they said, there's nothing
		
00:12:39 --> 00:12:42
			haram if they get married. But if someone
		
00:12:42 --> 00:12:42
			makes
		
00:12:42 --> 00:12:45
			Yanizina with a lady who was already married,
		
00:12:46 --> 00:12:48
			I mean, there's no solution for this problem.
		
00:12:48 --> 00:12:50
			You can't get married to the lady. Right?
		
00:12:50 --> 00:12:52
			So it's haram in all in all counts.
		
00:12:56 --> 00:12:57
			In the hadith of the prophet sallallahu alaihi
		
00:12:57 --> 00:13:00
			wasallam he talks about this the 7 who
		
00:13:00 --> 00:13:01
			would be in the shade of Allah in
		
00:13:01 --> 00:13:03
			the day of judgment and one of them,
		
00:13:03 --> 00:13:05
			the person who says, you any if a
		
00:13:05 --> 00:13:08
			woman who is wealthy, she's in a certain
		
00:13:08 --> 00:13:09
			position authority,
		
00:13:10 --> 00:13:12
			She invites the person to do something Haram
		
00:13:12 --> 00:13:12
			and he says,
		
00:13:13 --> 00:13:16
			myaavallah in the in the akhafullah. He says
		
00:13:16 --> 00:13:18
			I'm afraid of Allah. I'm afraid of the
		
00:13:18 --> 00:13:19
			punishment of Allah.
		
00:13:21 --> 00:13:23
			Sometimes you you feel like this is difficult
		
00:13:23 --> 00:13:25
			to happen in our daily lives.
		
00:13:26 --> 00:13:28
			About a month ago, I was invited to
		
00:13:28 --> 00:13:30
			the house of 1 of the brothers in
		
00:13:30 --> 00:13:31
			the community.
		
00:13:32 --> 00:13:34
			He says he travels a lot
		
00:13:34 --> 00:13:35
			and
		
00:13:36 --> 00:13:36
			one time
		
00:13:37 --> 00:13:38
			his son went for
		
00:13:39 --> 00:13:41
			like a trip to europe,
		
00:13:42 --> 00:13:44
			an educational trip.
		
00:13:44 --> 00:13:46
			He has some friends with him
		
00:13:47 --> 00:13:48
			like boys and girls.
		
00:13:49 --> 00:13:51
			So of course in the in the hotel
		
00:13:52 --> 00:13:53
			he stayed in a room by himself.
		
00:13:55 --> 00:13:57
			The others, the boys and their girls that
		
00:13:57 --> 00:13:57
			were
		
00:13:58 --> 00:13:59
			together, right?
		
00:14:00 --> 00:14:01
			So one of them
		
00:14:02 --> 00:14:04
			came to this brother. He's a Muslim brother.
		
00:14:04 --> 00:14:05
			I know him. He's a he's a herbal
		
00:14:05 --> 00:14:07
			brother. I'm not gonna mention his name.
		
00:14:08 --> 00:14:10
			So he said one girl
		
00:14:10 --> 00:14:12
			that he knew she used to go to
		
00:14:12 --> 00:14:13
			school with him.
		
00:14:13 --> 00:14:15
			He said he came to him at night.
		
00:14:15 --> 00:14:17
			She knocked on the door. He didn't look
		
00:14:17 --> 00:14:19
			at the thing. He just opened the door
		
00:14:19 --> 00:14:20
			and she was there.
		
00:14:21 --> 00:14:23
			He said she pushed him inside and she
		
00:14:23 --> 00:14:24
			locked the door
		
00:14:25 --> 00:14:27
			and she said, okay, why is everyone after
		
00:14:27 --> 00:14:29
			me in the group and you are the
		
00:14:29 --> 00:14:30
			most handsome one. Mashallah
		
00:14:30 --> 00:14:31
			he's he's handsome.
		
00:14:32 --> 00:14:35
			It's taller than me. More handsome. Mashallah is
		
00:14:35 --> 00:14:36
			you know, whatever.
		
00:14:36 --> 00:14:39
			So he said everyone is after me except
		
00:14:39 --> 00:14:40
			for you. What is this? What's wrong with
		
00:14:40 --> 00:14:42
			you? You wanna see a doctor? What's wrong
		
00:14:42 --> 00:14:43
			with you?
		
00:14:44 --> 00:14:46
			He said I'm a Muslim
		
00:14:47 --> 00:14:49
			and in Islam I'm not allowed to do
		
00:14:49 --> 00:14:51
			something like this. So she said, what he
		
00:14:51 --> 00:14:53
			want to do is he said, I'm not
		
00:14:53 --> 00:14:55
			allowed to be with someone and and until
		
00:14:55 --> 00:14:57
			or unless I'm married to them.
		
00:14:57 --> 00:14:59
			Okay. She said, okay. Let's get married.
		
00:15:01 --> 00:15:02
			He said, no.
		
00:15:03 --> 00:15:04
			No. You are not the right person for
		
00:15:04 --> 00:15:06
			me, and he kicked her out. He said,
		
00:15:06 --> 00:15:07
			leave. So
		
00:15:08 --> 00:15:10
			he said after this happened, he started to
		
00:15:10 --> 00:15:12
			cry, and he called his dad.
		
00:15:13 --> 00:15:14
			And and and he said, when this happened
		
00:15:14 --> 00:15:15
			to me, I remembered
		
00:15:16 --> 00:15:18
			when she was talking to me, I saw
		
00:15:18 --> 00:15:20
			use of Hari Salam in front of me
		
00:15:20 --> 00:15:23
			because it's exactly the same story. Right? She
		
00:15:23 --> 00:15:25
			locked the door, she pushed him and all
		
00:15:25 --> 00:15:26
			these things.
		
00:15:27 --> 00:15:29
			So it it can happen.
		
00:15:31 --> 00:15:33
			Sometimes it is difficult because
		
00:15:33 --> 00:15:35
			Shaitan is there, the nafs is there and
		
00:15:35 --> 00:15:36
			all these things.
		
00:15:37 --> 00:15:38
			And one of the things that I didn't
		
00:15:38 --> 00:15:39
			put here,
		
00:15:41 --> 00:15:42
			something is very
		
00:15:42 --> 00:15:44
			interesting. We call it,
		
00:15:45 --> 00:15:46
			stress.
		
00:15:47 --> 00:15:48
			Every one of us, if you're a student,
		
00:15:49 --> 00:15:50
			if you go to work,
		
00:15:51 --> 00:15:53
			if you left your country or on visa
		
00:15:53 --> 00:15:55
			and working here, there will always be stress
		
00:15:55 --> 00:15:58
			in your life. No matter how comfortable and
		
00:15:58 --> 00:15:58
			and
		
00:15:59 --> 00:16:02
			no matter how, you know, you have luxuries
		
00:16:02 --> 00:16:04
			in life, you'll always have this
		
00:16:04 --> 00:16:06
			stress in your life.
		
00:16:06 --> 00:16:08
			Every single one of us
		
00:16:09 --> 00:16:09
			needs
		
00:16:09 --> 00:16:10
			release.
		
00:16:11 --> 00:16:12
			Release.
		
00:16:12 --> 00:16:12
			Right?
		
00:16:13 --> 00:16:14
			So
		
00:16:14 --> 00:16:16
			what do people look for?
		
00:16:16 --> 00:16:17
			For release?
		
00:16:17 --> 00:16:19
			Some people do drugs.
		
00:16:20 --> 00:16:22
			Some people run after women
		
00:16:22 --> 00:16:23
			or men.
		
00:16:24 --> 00:16:25
			Some people drink.
		
00:16:25 --> 00:16:27
			There has to be a release.
		
00:16:28 --> 00:16:30
			The best release for youth,
		
00:16:30 --> 00:16:33
			from my personal experience, is ports.
		
00:16:34 --> 00:16:36
			So this is why if someone Yani says
		
00:16:36 --> 00:16:37
			my
		
00:16:37 --> 00:16:40
			my, Children, they don't listen to us or,
		
00:16:40 --> 00:16:42
			you know, they are away from Islam. I
		
00:16:42 --> 00:16:44
			tell them number 1, they have stress in
		
00:16:44 --> 00:16:46
			their life. They look around, they see their
		
00:16:46 --> 00:16:47
			friends doing stuff.
		
00:16:48 --> 00:16:49
			They have a lot of stress in their
		
00:16:49 --> 00:16:50
			life. They need release.
		
00:16:51 --> 00:16:52
			The best way is
		
00:16:53 --> 00:16:55
			sports. We play soccer Saturdays.
		
00:16:56 --> 00:16:58
			You can if it's a girl send her
		
00:16:58 --> 00:16:58
			for swimming
		
00:16:59 --> 00:17:01
			or basketball, Saturday, Saturday,
		
00:17:01 --> 00:17:02
			right?
		
00:17:03 --> 00:17:05
			You have to find release for the stress
		
00:17:05 --> 00:17:06
			in your life.
		
00:17:06 --> 00:17:08
			This is the normal way. It's perfectly natural.
		
00:17:08 --> 00:17:11
			Every single one of us, we have stress
		
00:17:11 --> 00:17:13
			in our life. So you have to find
		
00:17:13 --> 00:17:14
			the right release.
		
00:17:16 --> 00:17:17
			In Nafs.
		
00:17:22 --> 00:17:23
			In Shadrach
		
00:17:23 --> 00:17:24
			Bilbod.
		
00:17:25 --> 00:17:26
			The human self.
		
00:17:26 --> 00:17:28
			If you don't busy yourself
		
00:17:29 --> 00:17:32
			with good, it will busy itself with evil.
		
00:17:32 --> 00:17:34
			So you have to keep yourself busy.
		
00:17:34 --> 00:17:37
			And they say the wolf always attacks the
		
00:17:37 --> 00:17:40
			lonely sheep. If You are sitting by yourself,
		
00:17:41 --> 00:17:43
			you shot your room and you sit and
		
00:17:43 --> 00:17:44
			you think for yourself and you're not talking
		
00:17:44 --> 00:17:47
			to anyone, shaitan will jump over you. But
		
00:17:47 --> 00:17:49
			if you are talking to people, you are
		
00:17:49 --> 00:17:51
			out, you are busy with people, shaitan will
		
00:17:51 --> 00:17:52
			keep you away.
		
00:17:52 --> 00:17:56
			He'll keep away from you. Taban.
		
00:17:58 --> 00:18:00
			The prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam says in
		
00:18:00 --> 00:18:00
			the hadith,
		
00:18:03 --> 00:18:05
			if a man and a woman they sit
		
00:18:05 --> 00:18:06
			by themselves,
		
00:18:07 --> 00:18:09
			shaitan will make a third of them. This
		
00:18:09 --> 00:18:10
			is an authentic hadith. Right?
		
00:18:11 --> 00:18:14
			It doesn't matter how righteous you are. Kabir
		
00:18:14 --> 00:18:14
			al Hajjaz,
		
00:18:15 --> 00:18:16
			you made her 10 times,
		
00:18:16 --> 00:18:19
			she has half his Quran, it doesn't matter.
		
00:18:20 --> 00:18:22
			Well, Shaitan is not gonna look at your
		
00:18:22 --> 00:18:24
			credentials. He doesn't care. Right?
		
00:18:24 --> 00:18:27
			A man, a woman, Shaitan will make a
		
00:18:27 --> 00:18:27
			3rd.
		
00:18:28 --> 00:18:30
			And in about 9 months, you will be
		
00:18:30 --> 00:18:33
			4 because there's a boy or a girl
		
00:18:33 --> 00:18:35
			or maybe you'll be 5 if you have
		
00:18:35 --> 00:18:35
			twins.
		
00:18:36 --> 00:18:38
			This is how it works with Shaitan. Right?
		
00:18:39 --> 00:18:40
			This is how it works.
		
00:18:41 --> 00:18:41
			So
		
00:18:43 --> 00:18:45
			sitting together in khalwa is not recommended in
		
00:18:45 --> 00:18:47
			Islam. Some people when they,
		
00:18:48 --> 00:18:49
			when they get engaged,
		
00:18:51 --> 00:18:53
			now we're engaged. We can do whatever we
		
00:18:53 --> 00:18:54
			want. We can go out. We can go
		
00:18:54 --> 00:18:57
			to the movies. We can sit together by
		
00:18:57 --> 00:19:00
			ourselves. Nobody is there. Yes. Yeah. There's something
		
00:19:00 --> 00:19:02
			about this. I've seen people and you know
		
00:19:02 --> 00:19:04
			why I'm asking for it. I see people
		
00:19:04 --> 00:19:05
			who are like,
		
00:19:06 --> 00:19:07
			they'll be on the phone 24 or something
		
00:19:07 --> 00:19:08
			like, who are you talking to? Like, it's
		
00:19:08 --> 00:19:11
			not like, oh, it's my fiancee. I'm like,
		
00:19:11 --> 00:19:13
			wait, did you marry or whatever? They're like,
		
00:19:13 --> 00:19:15
			no. No. This is my parents. No. I
		
00:19:15 --> 00:19:17
			I told my mom about this person, so
		
00:19:17 --> 00:19:19
			now I'm talking to him back and forth.
		
00:19:19 --> 00:19:20
			Yeah. And they're doing the same actually even
		
00:19:20 --> 00:19:22
			before that. Right? So So is is that
		
00:19:22 --> 00:19:24
			permissible or no? Just because the mom and
		
00:19:24 --> 00:19:25
			dad know, does this still make it okay?
		
00:19:26 --> 00:19:27
			Well, the word,
		
00:19:29 --> 00:19:30
			this is a promise
		
00:19:30 --> 00:19:33
			to consider to consider marrying someone in the
		
00:19:33 --> 00:19:35
			future. This is not marriage.
		
00:19:35 --> 00:19:37
			If 2 people are engaged,
		
00:19:37 --> 00:19:40
			the guy dies in an accident or something.
		
00:19:40 --> 00:19:42
			Does she have to do a for him?
		
00:19:43 --> 00:19:46
			The 4 months and 10 days? The answer
		
00:19:46 --> 00:19:49
			is no. If he dies, does she inherit
		
00:19:49 --> 00:19:51
			from him? The answer is no.
		
00:19:51 --> 00:19:52
			But if someone
		
00:19:54 --> 00:19:56
			gets married to someone even by signing the
		
00:19:56 --> 00:19:58
			contract, by saying I do's, even without the
		
00:19:58 --> 00:20:00
			consummation of the marriage.
		
00:20:00 --> 00:20:02
			If the person dies before the consummation, she
		
00:20:02 --> 00:20:04
			will do the 4 months 10 days.
		
00:20:06 --> 00:20:07
			If he dies,
		
00:20:07 --> 00:20:10
			5 minutes after signing the contract, heart attack,
		
00:20:10 --> 00:20:13
			boom, they die, she will inherit from him.
		
00:20:13 --> 00:20:14
			She will get
		
00:20:14 --> 00:20:15
			her share of inheritance.
		
00:20:16 --> 00:20:19
			Zawja. Right? This is infiq.
		
00:20:19 --> 00:20:23
			So signing the contract even without consummation, it
		
00:20:23 --> 00:20:25
			gives the husband and the wife rights on
		
00:20:25 --> 00:20:25
			each other.
		
00:20:26 --> 00:20:28
			If she dies after signing the contract,
		
00:20:29 --> 00:20:30
			he will inherit from her.
		
00:20:32 --> 00:20:32
			Right?
		
00:20:33 --> 00:20:35
			And so on and so forth. But engagement,
		
00:20:36 --> 00:20:38
			it doesn't give you any rights.
		
00:20:39 --> 00:20:41
			They cannot allow to touch the lady.
		
00:20:42 --> 00:20:45
			You have no rights. Inheritance, I've done nothing.
		
00:20:45 --> 00:20:47
			Right? It's a promise to get married in
		
00:20:47 --> 00:20:49
			the future. So they cannot
		
00:20:49 --> 00:20:51
			sit by themselves in a room and they
		
00:20:51 --> 00:20:53
			lock the door and all this stuff because
		
00:20:53 --> 00:20:55
			there's no relationship. Right?
		
00:20:55 --> 00:20:57
			She can't they can't break
		
00:20:57 --> 00:20:59
			up and she can marry someone else. No
		
00:20:59 --> 00:21:01
			obligations whatsoever. Right?
		
00:21:02 --> 00:21:04
			So in this case, if they wanna talk,
		
00:21:04 --> 00:21:06
			it has to be under the supervision of
		
00:21:06 --> 00:21:08
			someone else. It doesn't have to be the
		
00:21:08 --> 00:21:10
			father or the mother or the brother. It
		
00:21:10 --> 00:21:12
			can be yeah. And even out of the
		
00:21:12 --> 00:21:14
			mama is. Yeah. And a kid who is,
		
00:21:14 --> 00:21:16
			like, 6, 7 years old, He knows what
		
00:21:16 --> 00:21:17
			is going on.
		
00:21:18 --> 00:21:20
			And this is what happens if if your
		
00:21:20 --> 00:21:22
			dad or your mom, they're busy. They would
		
00:21:22 --> 00:21:24
			put your brother or sister
		
00:21:24 --> 00:21:26
			and all we have to promise him is
		
00:21:26 --> 00:21:27
			just a bar of candy.
		
00:21:28 --> 00:21:30
			And he will report like the FBI.
		
00:21:31 --> 00:21:33
			Like, he looked at her.
		
00:21:33 --> 00:21:35
			He hold he held her
		
00:21:35 --> 00:21:36
			hand. You know,
		
00:21:37 --> 00:21:37
			5:30
		
00:21:38 --> 00:21:39
			is what he said. They will give a
		
00:21:39 --> 00:21:41
			full report. You don't have to worry about
		
00:21:41 --> 00:21:42
			anything. Right?
		
00:21:43 --> 00:21:45
			So this is not this is not a
		
00:21:45 --> 00:21:47
			relationship. So,
		
00:21:49 --> 00:21:51
			you don't take advantage of the engagement.
		
00:21:52 --> 00:21:54
			And as I as I say, once you
		
00:21:54 --> 00:21:56
			make sure that this is the right person
		
00:21:56 --> 00:21:57
			for you, you started them, you make it
		
00:21:57 --> 00:22:00
			to follow, you asked about them the background
		
00:22:00 --> 00:22:03
			check as most cultures do, they're caused. There
		
00:22:03 --> 00:22:05
			is no reason to delay in 5 years
		
00:22:05 --> 00:22:08
			7 years. Yes? Yeah. Because I've seen people
		
00:22:08 --> 00:22:10
			who've gone through the whole process like a
		
00:22:10 --> 00:22:12
			day before the marriage and then they didn't
		
00:22:12 --> 00:22:14
			work out. The girl like ended up talking
		
00:22:14 --> 00:22:16
			with the guy for like a year straight.
		
00:22:17 --> 00:22:19
			And then it's just a day before the
		
00:22:19 --> 00:22:21
			marriage didn't work out, heartbreak and the girl's
		
00:22:21 --> 00:22:23
			miserable. So The guys miserable. Things happen.
		
00:22:24 --> 00:22:26
			And I give this story before you Anawalay,
		
00:22:27 --> 00:22:27
			after the
		
00:22:28 --> 00:22:28
			like,
		
00:22:30 --> 00:22:33
			Khalas, they signed the contract, everything.
		
00:22:33 --> 00:22:36
			They disagree on the winning party.
		
00:22:36 --> 00:22:39
			Who is gonna buy what? Where they disagree?
		
00:22:39 --> 00:22:42
			Well, they they agree. Well, we're going to
		
00:22:42 --> 00:22:43
			buy gold.
		
00:22:44 --> 00:22:46
			He's gonna buy her a bracelet
		
00:22:47 --> 00:22:48
			and a necklace.
		
00:22:48 --> 00:22:48
			Alhamdulillah.
		
00:22:49 --> 00:22:51
			No problem. They signed the contract. Everything. They
		
00:22:51 --> 00:22:53
			go to the store.
		
00:22:53 --> 00:22:55
			We wanted to buy a necklace. They want
		
00:22:56 --> 00:22:57
			15 grams.
		
00:22:57 --> 00:22:59
			No. We thought you were gonna get 50.
		
00:23:00 --> 00:23:01
			So they they agree on the what they
		
00:23:01 --> 00:23:03
			are going to buy, but they disagree on
		
00:23:03 --> 00:23:04
			the weight
		
00:23:05 --> 00:23:07
			of the day. Or they disagree on how
		
00:23:07 --> 00:23:09
			much everyone is going to pay for the
		
00:23:09 --> 00:23:12
			wedding party. And they there is a divorce.
		
00:23:14 --> 00:23:18
			There's something interesting about women and men's relationship
		
00:23:18 --> 00:23:19
			in the Quran.
		
00:23:21 --> 00:23:23
			When Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala talks about
		
00:23:24 --> 00:23:25
			theft
		
00:23:27 --> 00:23:28
			It says,
		
00:23:32 --> 00:23:32
			The male
		
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			and female
		
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			thieves
		
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			give them the this punishment.
		
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			But
		
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			when he talks about
		
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			zina, it says, Azaniatwazani.
		
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			The female
		
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			and
		
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			male fornicators give them this punishment.
		
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			So why did Allah start with
		
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			the males in theft
		
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			and the females in fornication?
		
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			They say because most of the time in
		
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			fornication,
		
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			it's even if the man is approaching,
		
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			it is the woman who allows him to.
		
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			So if she is willing,
		
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			he will be able to do it. If
		
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			he's not willing,
		
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			he will never be able to do it.
		
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			If he if he forces her, this will
		
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			be * and he would be punished. There's
		
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			nothing with her. But most of the time,
		
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			the signal comes from the lady. He will
		
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			see something, he will hear something inviting,
		
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			and this is why he will go for
		
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			it. Just like you see in the story
		
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			of Yusuf alaihis salaam.
		
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			Usually, it is the way the lady speaks.
		
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			She tries to be more effeminate the way
		
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			the tone of her speech.
		
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			Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is telling the wives
		
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			of the prophet, sallallahu alaihi wa sallam,
		
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			don't be too effeminate when you talk to
		
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			men
		
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			because the person in whose heart there is
		
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			sickness, nifa,
		
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			will be attracted.
		
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			Right?
		
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			Or in the way the person dresses, like
		
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			the ladies, the way they dress.
		
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			They say that
		
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			sometimes
		
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			when ladies were revealing close,
		
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			most of the time they are desperate because
		
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			no one is taking care of them because
		
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			this is the human nature, you like to
		
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			be with someone, someone to care for you
		
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			emotionally and stuff. So when you see the
		
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			tight clothes and whatever and the cleavage and
		
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			stuff, this is why
		
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			because they're trying to attract attention. Right? They
		
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			want to be with someone. They do it
		
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			for attention. Right?
		
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			So this is why the signal comes from
		
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			the from the ladies,
		
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			not necessarily from the men. Right?
		
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			I'll show you a video
		
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			to show you that the quality of the
		
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			clothes
		
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			the person is wearing
		
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			will determine their action from the men.
		
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			We'll take a look then we'll,
		
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			continue inshallah.
		
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			We'll talk about it. Yeah.
		
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			Hey, everybody. It's me Kareem, Are We Famous
		
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			Now? You might have all seen a video
		
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			of a woman walking for 10 hours in
		
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			NYC while getting harassed.
		
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			Well, I thought I'd do a different version.
		
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			And in this version, we're gonna have my
		
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			friend walk for 5 hours in Hazlan clothing
		
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			and walk another 5 hours in hijack, which
		
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			is the Muslim guard. We're gonna see how
		
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			both compare, and we're gonna see the response
		
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			that she gets. Let's check it out.
		
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			Now with the hijab.
		
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			The same woman.
		
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			So she did 5 hours in normal clothes
		
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			like jeans and whatever.
		
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			And and you heard the comments.
		
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			Then 5 hours in full hijab and hijab
		
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			like this, and nobody said anything. 5 hours,
		
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			not even a comment.
		
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			And my understanding, this lady is not Muslim.