Mufti Menk – Boost #04 The Importance of Parents

			Salam aleikum, my brothers and sisters, your parents are probably the most important people in your
lives, whether they're living or not. Remember, Allah Almighty says Wakaba Buka, Allah Abu Ilaria,
the first declaration that he makes is none shall be worshipped besides Him. That is a declaration
of Allah subhanho wa taala. And then he says, What will validate any asylum, and it is compulsory,
obligatory, to be kind to your parents, to be kind to your parents. So, Bill Wiley Devi, Sana, Allah
makes mention of both parents while he then to mother and father. Now, this includes, like I said,
those who are alive, those who have passed on those who are Muslim, those who are not those who are
		

			living together, those who are divorced, those who get on those who don't, those who've done good
things, those who have done bad things, all of them, we need to fulfill their rights accordingly.
Now, that's a very, very deep ruling. within Islam, it's one of the most important things. Why is it
so important? And why do your parents have great value, if not one of the greatest values that Allah
Almighty has created in terms of relationships? The reason is, Who made you ask yourself? Well, my
maker made me Allah made me and what means did he choose for you to be brought onto this earth, he
chose your parents, so he chose them, this is all part of your test, they may not be good people,
		

			you have to still fulfill their rights, they may be brilliant, they may let you do what ever you
want to do, you still need to do what Allah permits you to do and what he has ordained. So you find
some parents, they let their children do whatever they want. And we'll tell my parents are cool,
they're really good. You know, it doesn't make them good. Being cool doesn't always mean you're
good. But were they kept teaching you and reminding you about what was right in terms of what you're
supposed to be doing on Earth? Yes, by all means. But if they didn't remind you, it doesn't mean
that you've just got to fulfill whatever they're saying. Now, let's get back to the issue of
		

			fulfilling their rights. Number one, to be kind to them, kindness, be kind to your parents, the term
son generally refers to kindness, I need to be kind, kind in the way I treat them. And as I grow
older, they may become in need of me. Not just my prayers, but beyond prayers, maybe physically,
maybe financially, maybe emotionally, morally, whatever else they might require my support in one
way or another male or female. It's my duty to ensure that I've done whatever I can to make my
parents comfortable and to let them live a life where they believe I was always kind to them. Now
notice Allah didn't say you have to agree with them. No, does he say you have to obey them because
		

			obedience is for Allah, where they have asked you to do something that is against what Allah has
asked you, then there is no obedience. Two reasons one is Lata utterly McClure infamous
theoretically, there is no obedience to the creation. When it comes to the disobedience of the
Creator, be it your parents, or whoever else it may be. That's number one. Number two is Allah
Almighty tells us law to pay homage do not obey both of your parents. If they have asked you to do
something that is in disobedience of Allah. We're in Jaha Dhaka Allah to Shrek Habima la Celica be
here in one fella to the OMA, if they are striving towards making you worship that which is besides
		

			Allah, that you that you obey that or worship that which is besides Allah, Allah says, Don't listen
to them. don't obey them, in fact.
		

			And Allah says, Sahiba Houma for dunya, Madhavan still, you should remain in their good
companionship on Earth. So be kind to them, feed them, clothe them, maybe give them an allowance,
make sure they have good accommodation, look after them. Keep reminding them about what's right and
wrong if they need to be told, but in a beautiful way. This is the fulfillment of the rights of the
parents. And remember, it does not mean that we should, if we are parents, if we are parents, it
does not mean we should use that card to
		

			Do whatever you want, because my beloved parents, we are under the instruction of Allah. So as much
as yes, I've spoken about the parents being the most important people in your lives, in terms of
your relationships, indeed. But if you're a parent, it does not give you the green light. Because
I'm a father, I can do what I want. Because I'm a mother, I can say what I want to do what I want,
what are you going to do, Allah has given me the authority he has it. Parents have not been just
given a blanket authority, not at all. In fact, one thing that a lot of people are making a mistake
with, and many young boys and girls come up with this issue. Culturally, in some cultures, the
		

			parents decide who the child is going to get married to, and that's it, and it's closed. It's not an
Islamic thing. It's got nothing to do with religion. It's a cultural thing. In religion, the child
has to be consulted. In fact, the adult has to be consulted, the person getting married, or the
people getting married, have to be consulted, they have to be happy with whatever is being offered
to them. If not, you offer them something else, you introduce them to something else, you give them
an opportunity again and again. And this is something that keeps repeating itself, including today,
I received an email from Pakistan, where someone was telling me I'm being forced against my will
		

			blackmail. My father says he will do this. And he will do that. And I have to get married to X, Y
and Zed. You know what, what do I do? It's a cultural problem that you're facing. It's not got to do
with religion, your father has no right at all to impose on his child. What the child does not want
in terms of marriage, no ways no chance. May Allah subhanho wa taala. Forgive us. So people think
this and some people try to use religious evidence to justify it. It's not correct. It's not true,
not at all true. It is your choice, you have a right to say yes or no. And you should exercise that
right. And nobody should be upset with you if you have exercised it. But parents are foolish when
		

			they have not communicated with their children from an early age and kept them in the loop and
spoken to them and guided them. Because many children are also making a mistake of wanting to marry
people who are not even fit to be their friends, let alone spouses. It's a fact of life. The person
you're trying to get married to and you're trying to tell your parents to be happy with your choice
is not even fit to be an acquaintance, let alone a friend or a spouse to make it worse. Why this
you're blinded to their character, their conduct, their their entire direction in life the way they
are, and who they actually are totally blind because you know what love is blind. End of the day,
		

			you don't even see it's a crush call. They call it a crush because why crushes you. Secondly, they
say you fall in love. Why? Because you fall you injure yourself, you get hurt. That's what it is.
Notice the words, the terms they use,
		

			are selected. carefully chosen is it hurts pains. And a lot of the times you know what, you make big
blunders. So we're supposed to have a beautiful relationship. Father, Son, Father, daughter, mother,
son, mother, daughter, and so on. We're supposed to have a good understanding let's talk, let's
communicate, let's give and take. Listen. Today's world has new problems, talk about them, address
them, give and take See, educate yourself to respond to be able to respond in a convincing fashion.
So inshallah I pray that Allah Almighty grant this is the actual point that I wanted to raise in
tonight's boost was your parents, your parents mean everything, serve them, look after them, give
		

			them feed them, clothe them, spoil them, do whatever they would like you to do to the best of your
ability for as long as it is not in the disobedience of Allah. But remember, if they're
unreasonable, you also have a right and a duty to correct them to guide them to tell them they are
wrong is your duty. Ibrahim alayhi salam told his father My father, you are wrong Subhan Allah and
Allah loved it so much that he mentions it in the Quran in more than one place. And his father
threatened him and he played the father card on him. Didn't work. It didn't help. Didn't know. You
know why? This is what Allah is teaching us. That way they are wrong, they are wrong be that your
		

			father or your father's father. If they're wrong, they're wrong. So this is part of being kind to
them is to correct them gently, and to continue to remind, but in the meantime, don't ever utter an
abusive word. Don't ever use a swear word on your own parents. You're not supposed to be doing that
to anyone anyway. Your own parents don't believe
		

			tell them if you have a misunderstanding or even if you're correcting them do so in the most
respectful was beautiful way Allah is watching. And I tell you the most blessed of people on Earth
are the ones who have fulfilled the rights of their parents. Look at them and check how successful
they are. listen to their stories, they look after their elderly parents, and they never ever give
up. Sometimes you may have a problem with your spouse and your parents. It's okay you continue to
fulfill the rights you're supposed to be fulfilling, even if you have to excuse your spouse from
that. May Allah Almighty grant us all a deep understanding what wonderful days of Ramadan These are
		

			the days of reconciliation, make the most of this and Allah will open your doors Solomonic worth
Allah