Lobna Mulla – #5 Standing Up for Yourself Khawla bint Tha’labah rA Upheld Allah Women in the Quran
AI: Summary ©
The speaker discusses the importance of patience and embracing change in difficult situations. They share a story about a woman named Khawla who refused to give up and went on to fight her husband, eventually finding a solution. The speaker emphasizes the importance of trust and working to find solutions.
AI: Summary ©
Have you ever confided in someone about an
unjust situation that you are in, and all
you were told was to just be patient?
Of course, patience is a virtue, but there
are times when patience is all we can
do, And there are times when we can
take action to mitigate the injustice.
There is a woman in the Quran who
is famous for just that, pleading her case
to Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam.
That woman is none other than Khawla bint
Thalaba radiAllahu Anha.
Khawla radiAllahu Anha relates her own story. She
says,
by Allah, concerning me and my husband Aus
ibn al Samit, Allah revealed the beginning of
Surat al Mujadila.
I was married to him and he was
an old man who was bad tempered.
One day he came in and I raised
a particular issue with him again. He became
angry and said, you are to me as
the back of my mother. Then he went
out and sat for a while in the
meeting place of his people.
Then he came back and wanted to resume
marital relations with me.
I said, no way, by the one in
whose hand is the soul of Kaulah, You
will never get what you want from me
after saying what you said, until Allah and
his messenger SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam decides between us.
SubhanAllah,
with her resolve and setting of boundaries, she
shatters stereotypes of the timid and weak woman
who has no voice.
Imagine Hawla stopping her husband's injustice
with her words and her actions, and then
taking her case to Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu Alaihi
Wasallam. She continues her story and says, he
tried to force himself on me, but I
was able to resist because I was a
young woman and he was a weak old
man. I pushed him away. Then I went
to one of my neighbors and borrowed a
cloak from her and went to the prophet
Muhammad SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam. I sat before him,
told him what my husband had done and
began to complain to him about my sufferings
because of my husband's bad temper. The prophet
Muhammad SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam said, oh Khawla, your
cousin is an old man. So fear Allah
with regard to him. I did not leave
him until Quran was revealed concerning me. He
was overcome as he usually was when Quran
was revealed to him, SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam. And
when it was over, he said, Oh Khawla,
Allah has revealed Quran concerning you and your
husband.
Then he recited to me, SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam,
Certainly has Allah heard the speech of the
one who pleads with you, O Prophet Muhammad,
SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam, concerning her husband and directs
her complaint to Allah. And Allah hears your
dialogue. Indeed,
Allah is hearing and seeing.
The Prophet Muhammad SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam told me,
let him release a slave. I said, Oh,
Messenger of Allah SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam, he does
not have that means to do that. He
said, Then let him fast for 2 consecutive
months. I said, By Allah, he is an
old man, and he is not able to
do that. He said, then let him feed
60 poor people with a wasak, a couple
100 kilos of dates. I said, oh, Messenger
of Allah SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam, he does not
have that much. He said, then we will
help him with a handful of dates. I
said, and I will help him with another
handful, You Rasulullah.
He said, you have done right and done
well, go and give it in charity on
his behalf, then take care of your cousin
properly. And I did so.
This incident placed Hawla radiAllahu Anha in high
regards among the companions who were her contemporaries
and knew her virtues,
especially Umar ibn Al Khattab Radilaw Anhu. One
day Khawla Radilaw Anha met him outside the
Masjid, when Al Jarud al Abdi was with
him. Umar Radilaw Anhu who was the Khalif
at the time greeted her and she said
to him, O O Umar, I remember you
when you were called Umayr, which means little
Umar in the marketplace of Uqaz,
taking care of the sheep with your stick.
So fear Allah in your role as Khalifa,
taking care of the people and know that
the one who fears the threat of punishment
in the hereafter
realizes that it is not far away. And
the one who fears death, fears missing some
opportunity in this life.
Al Jarood then said, You have spoken too
harshly to the emir of the believers, woman.
Umar said, Let her be. Do you know
that this is Khawla to whose words Allah
listened from above the 7 heavens? By Allah,
Umar should by rights listen to her.
Ibn Kathir
mentions in his tafsir that a man said
to Umar Radi Lu Anhu when he saw
him welcoming her warmly and listening to her,
he said, you left a man of Quraysh
and came to listen to this old woman.
Umar Radhi Wa Anhu said, woe to you,
do you not know who this is? The
man said, no. Umar Radhi Wa Anhu said,
this is a woman whose complaint Allah listened
to from above the 7 heavens. This is
Khawla bintutaalaba.
By Allah, if she did not leave me
until night fell, I would not tell her
to leave until she had got what she
came for. Unless the time for prayer came,
in which case I would pray and they
would come back to her until she had
got what she came for.
SubhanAllah, Khawla is an inspiration for all of
us. She summoned the courage to seek Prophet
Muhammad SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam's guidance when she was
faced with injustice.
And when she couldn't get an immediate solution
from him, as the legislation didn't exist yet,
Khawla didn't give up and go home, but
rather she continued to plead until Allah Subh'anaHu
Wa Ta A'la revealed Quran on her behalf.
When we find ourselves in difficult,
unjust, or even abusive situations,
we may not always have an immediate way
out, but we can put our trust in
Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta A'la as we try
to find that solution.
Understanding that we don't need to sit and
suffer in silence if we have the ability
to make a change can be very empowering.
Working to right a wrong whether it's home,
school or the workplace is not easy, maybe
very difficult, but perhaps reflecting on the courage
of Khawla will encourage us to plead our
case.