Jamal Zarabozo – A Guide for the New Muslim Part 8
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The importance of following guidance from Allah Sub hangro wa Taala in protecting one's life and the ultimate benefit of humans is emphasized. The need for individuals to reflect their actions and apply them in their daily lives is also emphasized. The importance of having a strong relationship with one's parents and being proud of them is emphasized, as it can be difficult to face conflict. The choice of being friends with pets or parents is difficult for most people, and individuals should consider what they need to do to save their own lives. The natural love of their parents is also emphasized, and the importance of protecting their religion and not obeying those who do not want to be associated with it is emphasized. The importance of healthy relationships with non Muslim relatives is also emphasized, and individuals should not disidentify themselves and show support for non- Islam individuals.
AI: Summary ©
Amina Muhammad or shadow in the law? Why should you get out? What should one know Mohammed Abdul
Allah Subhana. Allah says in the Quran,
all believers enter completely into Islam. As we stated earlier, Islam is a comprehensive religious
teachings touch upon all aspects of life. This is because no matter what aspect of your life you're speaking about, you should be behaving in such a way that you are pleasing Allah subhanho wa Taala, and you're worshiping Allah,
there is no compartment of your life that falls outside of the scope of a snap. And this is what is meant by entering into Islam completely. Once you become a Muslim, now that you've accepted Islam, it's not just a matter of, Okay, now I'm going to change my beliefs and say, I used to be a Christian, now I'm saying, I'm a Muslim,
I used to go to church, now I'm going to mosque.
And everything else will be the same.
No, actually,
Islam, the teachings of Islam touch upon all aspects,
all aspects of the behavior of your character of your ethics of your morality. So therefore, in reality, there might be a lot of things that over time, you're going to realize, Oh, this is not the way I'm supposed to behave as a Muslim.
There's actually a very different way than I'm supposed to behave.
And so Islam goes well beyond the articles of faith and the ritual acts of worship that we spoke about. But all of our behaviors is that our ethics, our manner, our practices, all of them must be guided by our belief in Allah, Allah, Allah, all of them must be guided by our belief that is none worthy of worship, except Allah.
Therefore, it is inconceivable that someone is really believing in Allah subhanho wa Taala, and implementing that belief properly. And at the same time, he's mistreating somebody, and he's cheating somebody else. And he's abusing somebody else, and he's abusing his spouse or children or whatever this is, this kind of behavior would actually demonstrate that his belief in Allah subhanho wa Taala, is faulty. And his implementation in his life based on that belief is not complete and proper.
Again, with respect to a no convert to Islam, it This may mean that there might be many things that you have to change about yourself,
in order to become a complete and true Muslim
might have many, many flaws from an Islamic perspective, maybe you never even thought of them as far as before, but you might have many flaws from an Islamic perspective
that you need to work on and you need to correct and this is not again, this is not, if you really want to be a complete Muslim, and do your best to please Allah subhana wa tada and to get as close to Allah subhanaw taala as possible, this is not an option. This is what you must do to be a complete and true Muslim. You start by being convinced of the truth of Islam, and you're entered into Islam, you start practicing the rituals of Islam and you continue to grow and you continue to change.
Now, personally, I have seen many, many people who have changed quite a bit after they becomes
you know, I'll give you a simple example of how people change.
And that is, there was an individual who, before he became Muslim,
when he got it when he would, when you participate in sports, it was very competitive.
And you know, when you play basketball, for example, on
the playground stuff, you're you're your own ref and you're judging the
game on your own you know, and sometimes somebody gets away with something and you feel it's not right it's not fair and you start getting really angry and almost fighting and stuff just over again,
due to the your competitive mate nature or you saw someone do something that you didn't like and so forth.
And as I said, this individual used to be like that before it became
like what after you became Muslim?
After you became Muslim, then all of a sudden his perspective changed, you know, again, was just just a matter of exercise just for fun. It's
doesn't really mean anything, if he loses or he wins, this doesn't make him a better person. Because for him now a better person means what he's doing with respect to have less fun with that. So now you can lose 50 games in a row, and it won't affect him whatsoever is getting his purpose from the game, his purpose from the game used to be maybe, to make himself look better than everybody else. And now his purpose is just to get some messages.
So his characters changed completely. And now when he plays, it never gets upset. He has no problem, you know, it gets along with everybody is playing with. And now it just becomes sport exercise.
Actually, the post I said him described the same kind of characteristic, when he spoke about a person who, before he was Muslim, he would eat a lot. And then after him, after he became some, all of a sudden, he changed his eating behavior, because of the influence and the effect of of Islam.
So as I said, it's not actually needs to permeate all,
all of your character. Because now you're
you have to understand that now, the way you look at the world,
especially for most people, you know, some of you maybe have a religious background, and, and the changes maybe are not that abrupt,
but for most people, but for most people who will convert to Islam that I've known,
their total worldview now has changed. Why are they living? What is the purpose, and this has ramification on all of their kinds of behavior.
So the goal is to become not just a Muslim with respect to what we claim to believe in, and maybe our rituals, but also our character, our behavior, our men's, and I'll listen to what the Allah has provided us guidance.
Allah has provided us guidance for our interaction with all different kinds of people.
And therefore, we have to understand what is this guidance? How are we supposed to behave, and then from there shallow work on making ourselves follow this game.
So listen to what God has given us guidance, even with respect to Muslim with respect to his own soul with respect to his own self,
he has some guidance from Allah subhanaw taala, a Muslim with respect to his parents,
a certain way of behaving the certain guidance from Allah Subhan Allah about how you should behave with respect to your parents,
with respect to your spouse, with respect to your children,
with respect to your neighbors, with respect to other Muslims, with respect to non Muslims, with respect to society as a whole, even with respect to wealth, and property, and the environment and animals and all sorts of things, all that's fine with that it has provided guidance with respect to all of these things.
And not only that, not only that Allah subhanho wa Taala. And the prophets I sent him and made it very clear that this is part of the essence of what Islam is all about.
This is the the behavior, the overall behavior with an individual. And with respect to all of these different categories that I mentioned, this behavior is part and parcel of what Islam is all about. Unfortunately, many people, many people emphasize some aspect of Islam and unfortunately, many times it's the outward aspects.
they emphasize you have to pray and they emphasize for example, maybe the dress and all of these things are important. But
the other aspects of the character and behavior cannot be neglected.
I cannot show yourself as a Muslim or think yourself as a good Muslim just because you dress a certain way, or use the to stick or something of this nature, while inside you and in your behavior. You're not actually behaving like a Muslim.
Because this is not Islam at all.
The promises made it very clear and what and what I did the process and described his message, he said I have been sent only for the purpose of perfecting the good morals and behavior.
This is what has been said.
This is part and parcel of what Islam is all about. The overhaul the the overall behavior,
not just the prayers and fasting so forth, but the overall behavior, morals, ethics.
This is what Islam is going to give us. And so therefore we can find, for example, the prophets I sent him talking about
good behavior.
Hold up the behavior, the manners, the etiquette, the ethics of an individual
And how important this is in Islam.
The prophet SAW Selim said, The tea is an enzyme he is he is a guarantor
of the house baits and Fiala Jin demon has an akula co is a guarantor of a house in the highest part gender, the highest part of paradise for the one who makes his behavior good.
This clearly shows the importance and the reward of improving and perfecting one's behavior.
Some people claim that their their character is simply what they're born with, and their behavior and the reactions are just what they're born with. And they cannot change. This is not true. And this hadith and all these are inherited, demonstrate that this isn't this isn't true.
As I said about the individual, for example, who used to get mad while playing sports, and then changes ways.
When you change your perception of things, you change your behavior also.
When you start really internalizing Islam, you change your behavior.
And so therefore, you cannot claim Well, this is the way I am and I cannot change it, this is not true.
Not true whatsoever, you can change may be difficult to change, may take a great deal of effort on your part.
But if you're willing to show that you can change
the promise I'll send Him as He even told us, the rope portion of
the profits I sent him told us that piety and righteousness is being of good character.
So the one who is pious, one of the ones who is pious, one part of that definition of being pious means that he has good character, he has good behavior.
And in fact, when the prophet SAW Selim described the hypocrites,
when the prophet SAW Selim described the hypocrites, the main things that he described about the hypocrites, is he described their behavior. He said that when they speak, they lie.
When they make a promise, they break their promise. So
is describing their behavior, you're saying that this, these are the characteristics of a hypocrite.
And if you have any of these characteristics, you have the characteristic of a hypocrite, not of a believer, not a true Muslim. These are the characteristics of a hypocrite.
So if you want to be if you want to have the characteristics of a true Muslim and a true believer, you have to rid yourself of all of these characteristics.
And once again, the example par excellence for the Muslims, and how to behave is the promises.
And as I said before, even some people talk about following the sun and emphasize the importance of following the sun. And again, following the sun is not just on the outward aspects,
doesn't have to do just with the length of the claws or growing the beard and these things which are, as I said, they are important, but this is only part of the sermon.
And by the grace and the mercy of Allah subhanho wa Taala, the Prophet Muhammad wa sallam.
He was not just the Messenger of God, but he was also a husband. He was a father. He was a member of society, he was someone who interacted with his friends, he was the leader of society and so forth, and so on. hamdulillah This is a great blessing from Allah subhanho wa Taala. That he has given us this example this man who has fulfilled all of these different roles, and whose teachings and his life has been so preserved, that a handler we can go to him and we can see how he behaved.
Am I said earlier, his wife, I said, kind of pull up a whole Quran that his behavior was different than what he was the embodiment of the Quran. We want to know how to act to implement the forum, we looked at the process. And when we studied the prophet SAW Selim, we see how he did, we see that he was sincere, he was honest, he was grateful, he was straightforward. He was humble, he was patient, he was calm, he was forgiven, he would not lie, you will not backbite you will not slander others, you had a cheerful disposition.
He treated all the people all the different people in society according to how they should be treated.
And all of these, all of these characteristics that he had,
he was setting the example for us and these are all part of what it means to be a Muslim and these are all part of what it means to be following the Sunnah and example of the promises.
And from an Islamic perspective,
the character in the manners and the behavior of an individual or once again, comprehensive.
We talked about the comprehensiveness of Islam and how it touches upon all aspects also, when we talk about
person's character, we are also talking about it in a comprehensive sense.
His behavior with respect to others is important.
His with his behavior with respect to himself is important. And his behavior with respect to God is also very important.
And this is another extreme that some sometimes we see people falling into.
You see, for example, someone who was very kind and a Muslim, you see a Muslim who was very kind and polite and very nice and smiles and so forth. And people say, Oh, this person has a good character.
At the same time, perhaps that person doesn't pray, doesn't fast, doesn't fulfill fulfill any of the rights of Allah subhanaw taala upon on the individual.
So therefore, his that person's character with respect to God is very bad.
And you cannot really say that the person has a good character if the one who's deserving the most, and the best behavior, the person is completely disregarding.
So from an Islamic perspective, when we talk about good behavior and good character, it is comprehensive, starting with our behavior towards Allah subhanho wa Taala.
That is the most important category.
But it extends all the way down to, as I said, even our behavior with other living creatures, animals,
our behavior, with the environment, all of this,
all of this is part of the Muslim behavior. Muslim is not free to behave, for example, to treat an animal just in any way, just because it is an animal.
It will be answerable to all of us. And with that,
it'll be answerable to Allah subhanho wa Taala, even with respect to how we behave,
how we behave with respect to animals. There's some Hadith of the process in which you described someone who was punished because she didn't allow his cat to go out and feed for free for itself or even to feed it. And how somebody else would be forgiven because he gave water to a dog to drink and so forth.
Yes, even how we behave towards animals
are shocked one time I was coming out of the the cabinet, and Mecca and there was an old man walking into the garden, if you visit the cover, you know, there's cats all over the place. And there was a cat in front of him and instead of just moving the cat, he just kicked the cat
is entering the cab of the harem, the place where the car was situated, is entering that mosque and
obviously you're going to enter that mosque to worship Allah subhanho wa Taala does he not think that there's any relationship between his worship of Allah and how he treats this cat that's in front of him? Now this is part of our problem as Muslims that we Muslims ourselves, we do not understand Islam and it's totaled
and I think it's important for new Muslims inshallah not to fall into those traps. I'm trying to shall advise you now that this is incorrect. You might see unfortunately, you might see many things from many different Muslims.
Maybe they don't mean wrong, maybe they just don't have knowledge, whatever the case might be.
But at least for yourself, try to understand Islam and the proper way
and inshallah do your best to apply and
even when, even when slaughtering an animal, Allah subhana wa tada has given us the right to eat certain animals and we should take them and slaughter them. Even when slaughtering an animal the prophets I send him has told us in the last testable sny the cliche, phrase a cartel for us in no particular way the bathroom. But as you know, the professor cinema has told us that Verily, Allah has prescribed excellence and all things.
And I think this statement, of course, the head is contingent, let me stop here for saying, I think the statement is a good description
of how a Muslim should behave in his life. under all circumstances,
the province has set himself in Qatar but is an akula a
son, sun means goodness, excellence.
know something with we will go above and beyond the call of duty as this
there should be some kind of dignity in the behavior of a Muslim and all of his actions. When he does any work, he does it with an excellence.
So the problem is I sent him said that unless prescribed excellence in all things, and then he goes on to even when you're going to kill when you're going to slaughter an animal, if you kill kill in a good manner, and if you slaughter slaughter in a good manner.
You know, you don't just take the animal and say, Oh, it's going to die anyway, so just run any way we can and just kill it.
Make it calm, make it relaxing. You know, don't make it. Watch other
animals being killed, make sure you sharpen your knife. So you don't have to struggle to kill the animal. This is all part of the etiquette, and the behavior of a Muslim.
And if that is how we're supposed to behave, even when slaughtering an animal, we should make sure that the knife is sharp, so we don't bring any undue harm to the animal. Then obviously, what should be our behavior towards everybody else in the, in this world? And what should be our behavior actually towards anything in this world? I mean, we just we just need to, we just need to reflect some sometimes.
We just need to reflect sometimes upon the Quran and upon the Hadith of the process. And just think about what you know, what is the process and I'm telling us here,
what does Allah subhanho wa Taala say in this verse, what are the implications of these teachings?
We do that in Shall I think? I believe
that if we do that inshallah, it will have a great deal of effect upon us
on our behavior,
we will then inshallah begin to really understand Islam and inshallah really apply it in our lives. And the ultimate goal, inshallah will be pleasing to Allah
will begin with the behavior of a Muslim visa v his own self.
Obviously, we are creatures of Allah.
This is something that the the the people in the Human Rights Movement,
forget many people in the Human Rights Movement, they are actually deist they believe in they believe in God, like Robert George, one of the famous natural law theorists, he says, He believes in God,
but they are forgetting the fact that we are a creature of God.
And so therefore, even how we behave, with respect to ourselves, what we can do and what we think we can do and what we think we shouldn't do, the answers to those kinds of questions what we can do with which we can't do what our rights what aren't our rights,
should be answered with respect to what Allah subhanho wa Taala has revealed.
And the prophet SAW Selim has explained to us, as mentioned in the Hadith is told us to individual that you know, yourself, your body, for example, has some rights over you.
And we are a creation of God.
And so, therefore, we are not even, we cannot even think of ourselves as our own owners, we do not own ourselves.
We're always a creation of God.
And the ultimate authority over ourselves even with respect to ourselves, is God.
And so, therefore, we have to behave with respect to ourselves in the manner that Allah subhanho wa Taala has ordered us to do.
First and foremost,
the individual should think about what he needs to do to save his soul.
And Allah subhanho wa Taala of course has given that to us in the guidance of the Quran and the Sunnah are the processes.
And as I mentioned, as I mentioned earlier,
actually, all of this guidance is for the benefit of humans. You know, Allah Subhana, WA tada does not benefit from us worshiping Him.
As I said earlier, if all of mankind turned their back on God, that one time God whatsoever, but we are the ones benefiting from it.
And it is a right that our soul has upon us, that we that we benefit from this guidance that Allah Subhana Allah has revealed.
There's no excuse for us to harm ourselves by ignoring this guidance from Allah subhanaw taala.
So therefore, the most important rights that we as human beings have on our own selves. Before we talk about anything else, we should demand ourselves that we turn to the guidance from Allah subhana wa tada and benefit from that game.
And as we said, when you do that, it is only for your own benefit.
As Allah subhanaw taala says in the Quran, we quoted some verses earlier, Allah subhanaw taala also says,
rarely We have revealed the book to you and truth for instructing mankind. He then who receives guidance benefits his own soul, but he who strays interest his own soul
and then
Talking to the boss Assalam says, and you are not set over them to dispose of their first processor was conveyed to us the guidance and we have the choice as human beings.
We have the physical choice in this world whether to follow that guidance or not.
But if we are going to do justice to ourselves.
And if we're going to fulfill the rights that our own soul has upon us, then we have to actually choose only one thing and that is to follow the truth. And that is what is going to benefit us in the long run.
Find and I will not go too much more into detail on this point. But you'll find that in Islam, find guidance for your own personal behavior.
You'll find guidance with respect to for example, eating and drinking and some of the practices even for example of what are known as the Sunil fitrah, or practices of personal hygiene. All of this has come through the revelation from Allah subhanho wa Taala.
And inshallah, if you apply it all
right, I should say if you do your best to title,
all of these teachings will be benefiting you. And so therefore you'll be doing justice to your own soul.
And this is part of your obligation, and part of you behavior that you should have towards your own soul. And let's move on to maybe the next category of people are the closest to you, that is your parents.
Allah subhanho wa Taala has demanded that Muslims we as Muslims, when we want to behave as Muslims, Allah subhana wa tada has demanded that we treat our parents in a very special and good fashion.
General, Muslims, by nature are very grateful.
First and foremost, we are grateful to Allah subhanaw taala. Obviously, this is part of our nature, part of our characters.
We have this characteristic of being grateful in the first place. And so therefore, we are also grateful to people who do good towards us.
As the policy SLM said, Man, let me go to nurse nimish Corolla, the one who does not, who is not thankful to the people that actually is not thankful to all this.
So the Muslim has this characteristic of being thankful towards people who do good to him. And obviously,
obviously, in general, for any individual, it is his parents who
did the most for him in his life.
From the time that he was born.
This there are some exceptions to this, obviously, but in general, it is the parents who have the most important role in your life and who you should be most thankful to.
On the time that you're born.
As you're growing up, they provide for you, they tried to teach you, they tried to help you, they're concerned about you, they sacrifice for you.
any harm comes to them, you know, they're willing to even risk their lives many times to protect you.
They do whatever they can to make sure that no harm comes to you and they guide you to the best way possible. And this is true By the way, regardless of whether the parents are Muslim or non Muslim in general, this is the way parents behave.
In general, unfortunately, you know, maybe nowadays things are changing a little bit. And some parents are not behaving in this fashion. But normally this is the way parents behave.
So there's no question especially for Muslim, there's no question that he should have a special feeling towards his parents.
And Alyssa, I know Donna has actually obligated upon the Muslims, that they be thankful to Allah subhanho wa Taala and that they behave properly towards Allah subhanho wa Taala and that they also behave properly towards the parents who also did much good for them. So for example, Allah subhana wa tada says in the Quran
for
me,
worship will love and join none with him and worship.
Do good to parents, kinsfolk orphans, the poor, the neighbor who is near can the neighborhood the stranger, the companion by your side, the wafer you meet, and those slaves whom your right hands possess.
Rarely Allah does not like such war, proud and both.
So in this verse, Allah Subhana, WA tada has combined his rights over his servants with the servants rights over each other.
And when I say servant, by the way, that expression, it means that human being means the human being in general, but the means more specifically, the Muslim who is obeying all is fine with that.
So among these different humans, a person must treat the following five classes, especially
those that are related to him, this is what we can see from this verse, those that are related to them, especially the parents,
those who are weak, and in need,
those whom he mixes with and sees on a regular basis, such as neighbors and so forth. Those who he comes upon on a temporary basis, such as the wafer,
and the slaves that he owns.
And in this last category, by the way, also some included with the slaves also the animals that he possessed.
So when you when you think about when you see when you read this verse, in the light of putting it in these different categories, it's very clear that actually almost anyone you've come across almost anyone you deal with either regularly or irregularly. You have to behave properly towards them. But as I said,
with respect to parents, there's many verses and many Hadith that put them in a very special position. So for example, Allah also says in the Quran
See, the farmhouse awesome say to them, come, I recite what your Lord has prohibited you from join not anything in worship with him and be good and beautiful to your parents.
In many places, Allah subhana wa tada combines the fact that we have to worship him along with the obligation to treat our parents well. Allah subhanho wa Taala also says
Karina,
and your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Tim, and that you'll be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life. Do not say to them a word of disrespect. And Do not shout at them. But address them in terms of honor.
And lower on to them the wing of submission and humanity through mercy. Always be very kind and merciful to them and say, My Lord, bestow on them your mercy as they did bring me up when I was small.
So here Allah subhanho wa Taala is teaching us this supplication
and telling us all love Have mercy on them as they did bring me up. In other words, they have rights upon me. They have rights upon me and so therefore I'm going to ask Allah subhanaw taala to help them
and Allah subhana wa tada also says,
and remember when we took a covenant from the children of Israel saying worship none but Allah, and be beautiful and good to parents again, relationship worshiping Allah only Allah and also one who was worshipping Allah subhanho wa Taala property he understands then the importance of being good and dutiful to parents.
When the prophet SAW Selim was asked one time about what deed is most beloved to Allah.
What did his most beloved to Allah,
Prophet the prophet SAW Selim said, or Salatu Allah wa T, her
prayer in his proper time.
This is the most beloved tool
and then he was asked and what after that, and the prophet SAW sent him said DOMA will validate.
Then after that, being dutiful to one's parents,
and then he was asked
Again and what after that, and the problem is SLM, said, Jihad roofie civilian, and the prophet SAW Selim said jihad or striving for the sake of Allah.
So even that striving for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala. The prophets, I said have mentioned, being dutiful, to one's parents, even before making jihad, for the sake of oil is fine with that. And in particular, with respect to the parents, Allah subhana wa, tada points out, the mother has a special place.
Mother, of course, went through a great deal of hardship and effort
in the child's birth and in bringing up the child. And in general also, we see that mothers are more emotionally attached to their children, even more willing to sacrifice for the children. So therefore, they are deserving of even more love, and respect, and gratitude in return.
So for example, Allah subhanho wa Taala says,
and we have enjoyed on man to be beautiful and kind to his parents, his mother bears him with hardship, and she brings them forth with hardship. And in fact, the province has said him when he was asked who was most deserving of our good friendship, and closeness, when the man asked him who's the most deserving of his good companionship, the Bible says Adam said your mother. And then he asked again, who next and he said your mother. And then he asked again, who next and he said your mother again three times you said your mother. And then on the fourth time, the process, said, your father,
so especially the mother, from Islamic perspective, has a very important role and deserves a great deal of respect and country.
Now, obviously, for most converts to Islam,
their mother, and their father, their parents
are usually not.
And when they convert to Islam,
the relationship with they have that they have with their non Muslim family can sometimes be a very difficult one.
Many times they receive opposition from them non Muslim family.
This obviously, for someone who is so close to you, and you grew up in you and you, you're obviously going to feel this love for your parents.
So therefore, you have this conflict, this will be a great trial for any condition, imagine this, if you haven't experienced it, you can just imagine what a great trial This is going to be for an individual. Here's his parents who he probably feels closer to than maybe anybody in his life.
And yet, at the same time, here's here's the teachings from God that he recognizes to be from God, his creator, his Lord.
And so when when you choose this, his parents get upset. And if he chooses to be with his parents and follow their ways, he knows that he'll be displeasing his Lord.
So the two most important figures if we can say, his parents and his creator,
there's this
conflict sometimes
have the left for many people, they don't, they don't face this, but in reality, many people faces
and we have, we have an example in the case of actually the companions of the pump, pump system.
And Mecca, when the prophet SAW Selim was first preaching his message, and that got the message received a great deal of opposition.
And many of those people who embraced Islam, they received opposition from their closest family relatives.
And some of them were even tortured because of their embracing of Islam.
Eventually, as we know, the small Muslim community emigrated to Medina and the community grew and so forth.
So therefore, they were forced to actually leave their lands, leave their homes and leave their families for the sake of their faith.
However, hamdulillah they were patient, and they persevered.
They by pleasing the Lord
because they understood,
they understood that their newfound relationship with God must and must take precedence over any ties with anyone in this world.
That is the fact.
It is the fact that when a human meets a lot the hereafter
when every individual meets Allah and the hereafter,
stands in front of Allah subhanho wa Taala as an individual he will be or she will be responsible for
his or her own actions
and the fact that others close to him or her dislike the truth
and try to persuade them from not following the truth This is obviously not an acceptable excuse to all to all of us.
And in fact, the love the Quran gives us numerous examples of how the person has to follow the truth. For example, Abraham with respect to his father and so forth, even if it means
even if it means breaking the relationship with his relatives.
And in fact, if such were an option,
you know, someone for example, could disregard God's religion because of the family ties and obviously, Allah subhanaw taala would have made that an option for the Muslims during the time of the prom houses.
So, therefore, they would not have to have been tortured, they would not have to have been banished from the lands and so forth.
But in reality, there is no such option. Unfortunately, and it is very difficult and if you just try to imagine it is very difficult. Unfortunately, some people have to make the decision between following God or being close.
And being friends with their pets.
In this good, this is one of the most difficult decisions that some people have to make. And as we said, in reality, there's only one choice that can be made.
There's only one choice that can be made, the individual has to follow Allah subhanho wa Taala and the teachings from Allah subhana wa tada
but that hamdulillah Al Hamdulillah for most people, for most people, even for most converts, even now, in the West, even with all of the negative attitudes that we find with respect to Islam in the West.
For most people handler The situation is not like what I just described
is usually a mixed reaction to a person's conversion.
Usually the relatives kind of accept the choice, but they may not like it,
they might even try to persuade the individual away from the choice that they made, but in the long run, they expect they respect and they accept the individual choice, they may never completely like it, they may never completely accepted, but at least they realize okay, this is my son or this is my daughter, this is the choice that they made. And I have basically two choices accept them as they are now as a Muslim or reject them completely. And most of them most of them ended up most of them ended up accepting,
accepting their child even if they even if they do not like the religion that is.
So under these circumstances, now, which is the more common case I would say nowadays, the Muslim has to realize that what is the what is now the limits limits of his relationship or her relationship with those people who do not belong to this faith and at the same time, they are not openly opposing the individuals.
Even after embracing Islam, your blood relatives have
still have rights over
fine. For example, in the case of Smith,
during the time of the prophet SAW Selim, a smell was a Muslim. And her mother was a polytheist.
And she was coming to visit so asthma went to the processor and said, What should I do?
My mother is coming to visit Should I still maintain the ties of relationship with my mother? promises seldom said yes. Keep the ties relationship with your mother.
Even though she's a polytheist
is still her mother.
And for example, a general teaching in the Quran Allah subhanho wa Taala says,
Allah does not forbid you to deal justly and kindly with those who fought not against you on account of religion and did not drive you out of your homes. Verily, Allah loves those who deal with equity.
So in other words, part of the relationship between a Muslim and non Muslim has to do with their attitude towards Islam and attitude towards Muslims. If they're not outwardly antagonistic, and fighting Islam, then we deal with them in a kind and just manner are they dealing with us in a kind of just matter that we
Then we reciprocate.
And with respect to non believing parents in particular Allah subhana wa tada says,
but if they were referring to the parents if they strive to make you join and worship with me,
that's concerning which you have no knowledge. So if they tried to make the individual they tried to make the Muslim commit Sure, I can see scribe partners to Alyson Hannah with Allah, Allah subhana wa tada says, then do not obey them.
do not obey them, okay?
First and foremost, you have to protect your religion, you cannot commit ship under any circumstances.
First, you have first responsibility towards your own soul even before you have responsibility towards your parents.
So if we commit you, if you obey them and committing shirk, then you are violating your own souls right upon.
This takes precedence over the right of your parents. So you have to protect your faith. And if they are, if they're putting undue pressure on you, or if they're trying to make you join, command, shift can COVID and so forth, then you did not obey them. But then all of a sudden with that, and this verse continued, it says, but behave with them and the world kindly.
And follow the path of him will turns to me and repentance and obedience. Okay?
don't obey them in anything that is obviously wrong, disobedience to Allah subhanaw taala and should cover, you have no right to obey them. And then, but even what's even in reference to these parents, Allah subhanho wa Taala says, but behave them in this world in a kind fashion.
So even this kind of parents, the Muslim, even though is not going to obey them and these kind of things, still, the Muslim is going to behave in a kind and generous
bashing towards his parents. As I said, a Muslim by his very nature, or by her very nature, supposed to be grateful.
We read the Hadith, the process, and I'm said the people or someone is not grateful towards the people's means is not grateful to Allah subhanaw taala.
And what this means, therefore, is that a Muslim will always have what is known as a kind of natural love towards his parents, even non Muslim friends, because of all the good that they did towards him, he recognizes, no part of being Muslim, is recognizing what is true and what is just and what rights people have. This is part of being Muslim. So he recognizes what they did for him,
though he recognizes the goodness that they did, the kindness that they did. And probably they're continuing,
to some extent, to be kind to them and so forth. And so therefore, he always will have this
what is known as in the Islamic in the Islamic terminology, this natural love, you will always have this natural love for his parents, and there's nothing wrong with it.
However, at the same time, he cannot possess a religious love.
In other words, a love based on the teachings of the religion for their actions.
In other words, he can never condone or approve
of the way that they're following that goes against Islam.
So he cannot have any love for the you know, they are not Muslim. So they're following Cofer and shortcode. Or following display for associating partners with Allah subhanho wa Taala. He cannot have any love for the way of life Therefore,
as much as he shows kindness to them, and as much as he has this natural love for them.
For all that they've done for him, he can never condone, or accept or approve of the way of life therefore, and if at any time there's a conflict between this natural life
and the demands of the religion or this religious level, what is right and what is wrong, then the religious aspect has to take precedence
as Allah subhanaw taala says in the Quran,
Oh you believe, take not for supporters and close friends and helpers, your fathers and your brothers if they prefer disbelief to believe.
And whoever of you does so
wherever you use still takes them as their close friends and supporters and helpers, even though they prefer disbelief, then whoever does so then he is one of the wrong doors.
Say and then Allah subhanaw taala says to the problems and to tell the people, if your fathers, your sons, your brothers, your wives, your kindred, the wealth, we have gained commerce and what you fear decline and the dwellings in which delight are dear to you, then Allah and His messenger and striving for his cause, then wait until Allah subhanaw taala brings about his decision. And Allah guides, not the people who are rebellious disobedient to Allah.
So when they when there is a conflict between the religious demands, and what you love and respect and wants, from a religious perspective and recognizes the truth, and what is correct, then that has to take precedence over your feelings for your parents that are based on this natural love of the goodness that they've done to you in the past.
Because ultimately, Allah has more rights over you than even your own parents. Yes, the parents did a lot for you. But even what they did, even all that they did for you, does not compare to what allegedly
many things are outside of the control of your parents, and they were given to you by Alyssa and without your sight you're hearing all of this is actually given to you by Allah subhana wa Tada. So if you're going to be grateful to anyone, and see who has more rights over you, it is actually Allah subhanho wa Taala has more rights over you than your own parents, and even your own soul,
even your own soul when it comes to conflict.
When it comes to this kind of conflict, your soul has the right that you will bail us out with data. And you do not obey your parents. But I hope and show love for most of you. For most of you, you do not get into too many situations where there is this conflict between? Or am I going to treat my parents well, or am I going to bail us out? Shall I that is not going to occur to most of you. And if it doesn't show that's not going to occur often.
And so therefore, and Muslim does not have any right to show approval and acceptance of any force for motion. And the law, Allah subhanho wa Taala has guided you to Islam. And you recognize that it is the truth. And so therefore, we should embrace this truth
completely and recognize that
every other path is not the path that is pleasing to us.
So even when you keep cordial and good relationships with your non Muslim relatives, whether it is your family or not, you must keep yourself clear of doing any kind of action, especially any kind of worship, and participating in any kind of worship, which you know, is shocking.
For example, a Muslim, after converting to Islam can no longer celebrate Christmas.
Because Christmas supposedly is right a celebration of the birth of the Son of God, the whole, the whole idea of the Son of God and so forth is now things that you reject you don't believe in this, you believe that this is to say these things even to believe in these things. This is shocking
to say these things that this is displeasing to God. So obviously a Muslim cannot compromise
is to hate and his relationship to Allah subhanho wa Taala by participating in any kind of celebration, any kind of act of worship, that he knows.
And he should not even congratulate them, for example, for these kinds of actions.
And as I said, participate in these kind of actions in any way and he should or he or she should be very clear
and straightforward with everybody.
Look in all these things, I do not believe in these things anymore. they contradict what I believe in, and they even negate actually what I believe in. So, you know, I respect you, and I'm going to deal with you in the best way.
And actually, by the way, many, many converts after they convert to Islam, even though their parents are non Muslim, they begin to realize the importance of their parents and they begin to treat them much better after becoming Muslim than before their homes.
But anyway, you're a good example in your behavior towards them should show them Look, I don't mean any hard feelings by this, but this kind of practice, obviously, I can no longer I can no longer do.
Now part of the proper relationships towards one's relatives, one's parents and other non Muslim relatives, includes visiting them.
Especially if part of the intention behind your visit is to let them know about Islam and to show them, let them see you as a Muslim and to let them learn about the learn the true information about Islam, obviously, such visitation is good.
We can, we can find many examples. And the sooner the province has in them that there's nothing wrong with visiting non Muslim relatives and, and obviously one's parents especially, especially if there's some hope, inshallah, that they might learn about Islam. The prophet SAW, Selim visited obatala, with all of his uncle, the polytheist, when he was ill, he visited a Jewish boy, Jewish boy who used to come to him when he when he was ill, he went to his house and visited this Jewish boy on his deathbed, he would accept invitations for meals and so forth. So, therefore, this is still part of the proper relationship with the non Muslims you can still visit them and, and keep these kind of
ties of relationship but as I said, the important thing is to remain within the limits of Islam not to condone, shirk and COVID and so forth. And in fact, one particular situation that arises quite often is the question of when one of one of your relatives or non Muslim relative passes away.
Obviously, the death of someone is a very emotional situation and therefore the your your non Muslim family members are going to be expecting you to show up and be part of the
part of the ceremonies that's going to occur with respect to the death of an individual.
In general, what we see from from like the practice of the early Muslim scholars, is that a Muslim should pay condolences to the family and he should be you know with them, and present with them during the time during this time of stress and hardship from them, but he must stay away from the specific acts of the funeral process. He should stay away from anything that obviously has any kind of religious overtone.
The obvious goal then as to remain away from anything that may contradict Islamic faith in any way.
When obatala began dunkel processor have died as a non Muslim, the prophet SAW Selim
told Ali, who was the son of obatala, to go and bury his father. And he did so,
is also reported that when the province of Salem was asked about a Muslim whose Christian father had died, the power system said that he should go and attend and bury his father.
So, this kind of thing, still you offer condolences to them and you are present, but you must stay away from anything that has any kind of religious significance to it whatsoever.
And even while paying condolences to them, you know, you wish them well.
You tell them that you have nothing but goodness reaches them and you encourage them to be patient. These are all part of the proper behavior towards a non Muslim, but you do not ask for forgiveness or you did not seek forgiveness. Right for the one who has died. While not
this is been prohibited by Allah subhanaw taala furano Listen, I'm
it is not proper for the prophets. And for those who believe to ask a loss forgiveness for the policies, even if they be a relative after it has become clear to them that they are the dwellers of the Hellfire In other words, after it is clear to them that they died in a state of disbelief.
So there are limits
Obviously, with respect to dealing with one's parents and with respect to dealing with not one, once non Muslims, relatives in general, in general, unless they are outwardly fighting clearly against Islam in general, the principle is you continue to deal with them in a kind and very good fashion, you keep the ties in relationship with them, you visit them.
If they ordered you to do something wrong with that, you know, that goes against the Sharia, obviously, you do not obey them. But even if they are ordering you and trying to encourage you to do something wrong, even then you'd have to try to behave with them in a good way. And you try to explain to them, Look, I'm a Muslim. Now, we have these beliefs, we have these practices, I can no longer do these kind of things that I used to do in the past shala when they see that you're sincere, when they see what a good effect Islam has had upon you, as in many cases, this is the case is the cases with people who convert to Islam. When they see these things in your inshallah, they
begin to appreciate in many cases, they begin to appreciate the fact that you are now almost, you know, they may never become Muslim. Unfortunately, they may never really like Islam, but they, they can get to the point where they appreciate that you are a Muslim, and therefore inshallah they respect you as a Muslim. And therefore inshallah they respect the limits of your religion. And you know, when you are calm with them, and when you are open with them, and when you show them that you still have that love for them, and you're still behaving properly towards them, inshallah, they will accept and respect and they will allow you to practice your religion and not try to influence you to
do something that is wrong, inshallah, and you will continue inshallah, to have a good relationship with them, even though now you're a Muslim, and you cannot condone and accept the way of life that they're following. But you still have that feeling of gratitude and respect for them, due to what they have done for you during all of your years of growing up.
And that's all we have time for now. So inshallah next time we'll continue.
We'll talk about relationship between Muslim and his or her spouse next time.